BONUS: Other Jobs & Getting Older (w/ Vic Michaelis)

Summary

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Staying Alive with Jon Gabrus & Adam Pally

BONUS: Other Jobs & Getting Older (w/ Vic Michaelis)

SmartLess Media • May 26, 2026

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Episode Overview

In this bonus episode, Jon Gabrus, Adam Pally, and guest Vic Michaelis dive into candid (and often hilarious) conversations about “other jobs” they could see themselves doing if they weren’t in entertainment, their perceived lack of real-world skills, and the existential shifts that come with getting older. The trio balances irreverent banter with surprisingly vulnerable reflections on family, loss, adulthood, and finding new anchors later in life.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Fantasies About "Other Jobs"

[00:14-03:47]

• The crew contemplates which careers they could pursue outside entertainment.
• Vic poses the central question: “Do you have jobs where you’re like, if I were to give it all up tomorrow, I think that this is the job that I would do?” [00:14]
• Adam and Jon make self-deprecating jokes about their limited skill sets outside comedy:
  • “There's nothing that I can do that another person couldn't do better besides comedically act sometimes.” – Adam [00:20]
• They riff on the idea of teaching guitar, running clothing boutiques, or working in service — mostly landing on how these paths would end in “disaster.”

Notable Quotes:

• Jon to Adam: “You just told your best friend you think he can be an unsuccessful singer songwriter.” [01:03]
• Adam: “I think I would love to be a teacher… and then also mostly just live for my summers as a beach life.” [02:51]
• Jon: “I think I would be either a barten, a bouncer, or a lifeguard… and I, I, I had those three jobs when I was 20.” [02:26]
• Adam, summarizing: “I would be terrible in anything where my mind was relied on for… any problem.” [03:33]

The Absurd Alternate Life "Pitch"

[03:47-05:32]

• Vic pitches Adam a fake “alternate life” (married to Lucy, three blonde-haired kids, living between Greenwich, NYC, and Oxnard) to playful confusion:
  • Vic: “You and your wife Lucy are running a podcast that is kind of an mlm… you’re selling people stuff.” [04:42]
  • Adam: “It better be a movie or else, like, I won’t understand it.” [03:46]
• They joke about Adam’s likely failure as a salesman and the awkwardness of trying to sell to friends.
• Adam admits: “I don’t have the killer instinct. I don’t… I wouldn’t want you to feel like you had to buy it.” [05:10]

What Would Vic Do?

[05:32-06:51]

• Vic reveals that, given her experience during her mom’s illness, she’d become a nurse:
  • “I really, I was spending a lot of time in the hospital… and I was like, I could be a nurse… it’s like the performer part of, like, having to deal with people all the time. And I also don’t care about hurting people’s feelings if it's in their best interest.” [05:32]
• Adam and Jon draw a parallel between Vic’s straight-man style in comedy and the grounding, caring presence a nurse provides.
  • Adam: “You're probably the best straight man working right now… comedy is very giving… to both the audience and your scene partner.” [06:12], [06:44]

Grief, Family, and Getting Older

[06:51-13:38]

• The conversation shifts to processing loss and growing up through the death of a parent and becoming a parent.
• Vic shares about losing a mother just as dramatic career changes unfolded:
  • “My mother died… right when I got my first big job role… it was like the similar feeling… I have to grow up in so many ways so quickly right now.” [06:58]
  • Adam: “Your son was also born. Your first son was also born right around then, too.” [07:24]
• They talk about grief as an ever-present part of adulthood.
  • “That feeling of, like, grief… not something that you, like, kick away. It’s just, like, always there.” – Adam/Group [08:16]
• Jon reflects on his pro-union upbringing and how parental pride shaped his ambitions:
  • “Every time we watch a movie, Johnny, right there, that’s the bug. That’s the bug. Union puts food on your table every night. Don't you forget it.” [10:11]
  • “I wish I could call my dad about this. Of course, so, like, some of the successes don’t feel as rich, you know what I mean? Because you’re like, the guy I want to tell about.” [10:43]
• Adam references Larry David’s comment about fame in the absence of parents for perspective:
  • “Someone was like, how are you so excited that at, like, 65 you’re on the cover of Rolling Stone? He’s like, I don’t give a shit. My parents are dead.” [09:20]
• The group muses about looking for people “ahead” of them in life, with Jon jokingly using comedy veterans as his surrogate elders:
  • “Let’s just say older at this point are sort of comedy peers that have been doing it longer… I'd much rather look at Matt Besser’s life than look at any one of my blood relatives’ lives.” [13:07]

Notable Quotes:

• Vic: “I identified a lot with having to be, like, the kid and an adult at the same time.” [07:42]
• “The good news is it doesn’t get better.” – Adam (dryly) [08:02]
• “You have to, like, reconfigure how you view success because… so much of… for me, it was like, I want my mom and dad to be proud of me… and then it’s like, well, that doesn’t matter.” – Adam [09:43]

Aging, Mentors, and Comedy Elders

[13:07-13:57]

• Jon reflects on the lack of family elders for guidance after moving to California and losing his dad, noting that comedy mentors have taken their place.
• Vic: “Don’t look to them.” [13:38]
• Adam: “I'd much rather look at Matt Besser’s life than look at any one of my blood relatives’ lives.” [13:38]
• They joke about Florida’s “crazy customs” for entry, poking fun at family quirks and aging in the comedy community.

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Memorable Moments & Quotes

• “You just told your best friend you think he can be an unsuccessful singer songwriter.” – Jon [01:03]
• Vic’s nurse pick and discussion of detachment and clarity in care: “I don’t care about hurting people’s feelings if it’s in their best interest.” [05:32]
• Jon: “Some of the successes don’t feel as rich… the guy I want to tell about is gone.” [10:43]
• Adam: “The good news is it doesn’t get better.” [08:02]
• Larry David's quote: “I don’t give a shit. My parents are dead.” [09:20]
• Jon: "I'd much rather look at Matt Besser’s life than look at any one of my blood relatives’ lives." [13:38]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Alternative Career Fantasies: 00:14 – 03:47
• Absurd “Alternate Life” Pitch: 03:47 – 05:32
• Vic's Nursing Aspirations & Comedy Straight Man Parallels: 05:32 – 06:51
• Processing Grief, Family, Success: 06:51 – 11:55
• Aging, Mentors, and Surrogate Elders: 11:55 – 13:57

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Tone and Style

• Irreverent and self-deprecating humor, balanced with striking moments of vulnerability about loss, family, pride, and growing up.
• Frequent banter layered with quick-pivoting to deep personal truths – a hallmark of the trio’s conversational style.
• No-holds-barred honesty about mental health, career anxieties, and existential reflection, delivered with warmth and comic relief.

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This bonus episode of Staying Alive is for listeners who want to laugh about midlife crises, ponder what comes after losing your anchors, and feel less alone in figuring out adulthood—with Gabrus, Pally, and Michaelis as your brutally honest (yet loving) guides.

Transcript

[A]

Bonus clip.

[B]

Do you have jobs where you're like, if I were to give it all up tomorrow, I think that this is the job that I would do.

[C]

Yeah, I have a couple ideas that I would. But I. I do, but I. At the same time, like, there's. There's such fantasies for me because I truly don't have any other skills, like, have interests, but I have no other skills. Like, I can't. There's nothing that I can do that another person couldn't do better besides comedically act sometimes.

[A]

Yeah, I would.

[B]

Not true. It's like, I think especially if you worked at it. You know what I mean?

[A]

I know it, but you could be.

[C]

I know it.

[A]

I could picture you being.

[C]

No matter how I worked.

[A]

No, I could picture you performing singer, songwriter stuff, but more mostly making your money teaching guitar.

[C]

That's. Yeah, that's the saddest existence. It's like, Dan. You picture me as, like, the guy from, like, Dan Smith, like, teach guitar.

[B]

You just told your best friend you think he can be an unsuccessful singer songwriter.

[A]

He could be chasing the dream of a singer songwriter. Maybe he's a successful one. He's a successful singer songwriter.

[C]

Now, I don't have a. I don't have a. There's not much else here. You know what I mean? Like.

[B]

But what I'm saying is, like, if you had another career doing something, I think your personality and your ability to sort of, like, perform for people and connect with people, I do think would make you like the guy where they're like, well, you got to go talk to Adam.

[A]

You couldn't own a clothing boutique.

[C]

Absolutely not. I couldn't do the math. I can.

[A]

That's not. That's someone else's job.

[C]

I would still fuck it up. The books would be.

[B]

You'd be running a business because you'd keep getting promoted. Because people are like, well, we want to hang.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah. But eventually, you know what happens? Those people, they kill themselves in a

[B]

hotel room or they get arrested. They were running a pony.

[C]

Yeah, that's true. That's maybe what I was thinking about doing tonight.

[A]

So Vic's question is if there's anything else you could do outside of entertainment. Your answer is kill yourself in a hotel.

[B]

Yeah. You said. Yeah, a couple of things, but it's mostly.

[C]

I don't want to talk about it. I don't want to talk about.

[B]

Nobody wants to talk.

[C]

I don't want to talk about it.

[A]

We need to talk about Kevin's hand. I. I would be a lifeguard. And if that Meant I also had to be a teacher. That's what I would do.

[B]

Teaching guitar lessons.

[A]

Well, I can't. I don't have that kind of skill set. I would have to teach, like, you know, seventh grade English and get kids excited about.

[B]

Whoa.

[C]

Yeah, I think, I think, I think I would be a decent teacher.

[B]

I think you guys would both be high school teachers that would, like, run the school. You know what I mean? You'd also, like, help out with the drama department or whatever.

[A]

Oh, hell yeah.

[B]

I think.

[C]

I don't know. I feel like I, If I was not. I feel like the. Any ambition I have is strictly personal. And so if I was doing a job that, like, didn't benefit, like, if I was like, a teacher, I feel like I would just be like, fuck, no, I'm not going to coach. Like, how much money you get paid for coaching third base? Maybe I'll think about it. You know what I mean?

[A]

It's like, I think I would love to be a teacher and then coach some sports, run one weird club, and then also mostly just live for my summers as a beach life.

[C]

Exactly. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And maybe if I, if I'm. Because that's me thinking, if I don't go into entertainment, I stay on Long Island. If I, if I escape. Yeah, if I escape, I could be a lifeguard in California year round. I don't even have to. School sucks, right? I fucking hate.

[C]

Yeah, I hate it.

[A]

And I, I've, I've been dealing with this a lot.

[B]

You don't have to be a teacher. This is a thought exercise. This is.

[A]

You could, like, sound like Adam. I'm like, I don't think I could do anything but teach.

[C]

No, that's.

[A]

I think I would be either a barten, a bouncer, or a lifeguard would probably. And I, I, I had those three jobs when I was 20.

[C]

Yeah. But, like, I could definitely not work in service. I would be terrible in service. I would be terrible in anything where my mind was relied on for, like, you know what I mean? Like, any, any problem.

[B]

Can I pitch you something?

[C]

It better be a movie or else, like, I won't understand it.

[B]

Okay, I'll pitch it to you like a movie. But it's not a movie.

[C]

Okay?

[B]

You're married to someone else. You have three kids. They all have blonde hair.

[C]

Wait, this is my real life, is it?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Okay, well, this is different.

[C]

Okay?

[B]

It's different how?

[A]

I think you're gonna book this role. How?

[B]

You're married to somebody named Lucy, and the kids are named Abigail, Jean and Ryan.

[C]

Okay, that's different.

[B]

I guess it's different.

[C]

The names are different.

[B]

Oldest girl, twins.

[A]

Okay, okay.

[C]

Different.

[B]

Different.

[C]

Sort of.

[B]

Not really. It's totally different. Okay, you're living somewhere else. Where do you live right now?

[C]

Harlem. New York City.

[B]

It's different. You're living somewhere else.

[C]

Where?

[B]

Downtown Greenwich.

[C]

Greenwich is not that far away.

[B]

Greenwich. But then you also have a place

[A]

somewhere else in the city.

[C]

Like in Harlem?

[B]

No, in like Oxnard.

[C]

So you're like, that's a long commute to get.

[B]

It's a really long commute. You gotta fly to Burbank and then you gotta drive. You're renting cars. You don't own a car out there.

[C]

I don't think I would want that.

[B]

It didn't make any sense.

[C]

Except for the fact it's an albatross on my profile too.

[B]

You and your wife Lucy are running a podcast that is kind of an mlm. And so like, you're selling people stuff.

[A]

Maybe pills, marketing.

[B]

Oh, you, you would be amazing running a multi level marketing scheme.

[A]

I would say, like, Adam would be a very good salesman of any type. Salesperson of any type.

[C]

I was not. I worked in high school at a. And I was a terrible salesman because I don't have the killer instinct. I don't.

[B]

But it's personal family logging.

[C]

Sometimes you do.

[B]

Sell me something. Come on.

[C]

I wouldn't want you to feel like you had to buy it.

[B]

Come on, sell it to me.

[A]

Try hand soap.

[B]

I'm out. Thanks so much. This was so fun.

[C]

Find something they

[A]

or want would ever use.

[B]

I'm hearing the note of you, Vic. I'm hearing the note. I'm listening to the note and I'm gonna take the note.

[C]

What are you, what are you?

[A]

What about you, Vic?

[B]

Nurse.

[A]

The nurse.

[C]

Really?

[B]

Yes. I'm like, I, I, I feel so strongly, like, especially over the pandemic. I was like, I, I really, I was spending a lot of time in the hospital. My mom got quite sick and so I was just like, I was there all, all the time and I was like, I could do, I could be a nurse. I think it'd be so. I think I'd be really good at it. It's like the performer part of, like having to deal with people all the time. And I also don't care about hurting people's feelings if it's in their best interest.

[A]

That's powerful.

[C]

That's a nurse.

[A]

Nurses like that. Yeah, they love to have that.

[C]

Two things I wanted to say to you, and I probably forget One. While I'm saying the first one, but the.

[A]

The.

[C]

That doesn't shock me. Because of your comedy.

[B]

Oh.

[C]

Because I feel like you're probably the best comedy. I know. I just feel like you're probably the best straight man working right now.

[B]

Oh, that's really kind.

[C]

But in your straight manning, you have to do a lot of keeping the ball in the air while Bob. While being the audience's like, grounding point,

[A]

elite level voice of reasoning.

[C]

Right. And in that what you're really doing, you're kind of taking care of the audience and the performer who may not be on, who's got, like, prosthetic right there.

[A]

And so that's.

[C]

It doesn't shock me. It feels like you're. You're. You're comedy is very giving in a way that's to both the audience and your scene partner.

[B]

Yeah. That's very, very kind. I. I really appreciate that. That's certainly what I'm going for. So I.

[C]

And the second thing I was going to say was I relate. I relate to you about your mother. I lost. My mother died. You were saying that you, like, you're just feel like you're getting success and like, my mother passed away. Right. Like, right when I got, like, my first big job role.

[B]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[C]

It was like a similar feeling where you're like, I have to grow up in so many ways so quickly right now.

[A]

And not to pile on your story, but your son was also born. Your first son was also born right around then, too.

[C]

Yeah. 10 days.

[B]

But I didn't want to 10 days after or before.

[C]

After.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

But it's like, it's all. That's life. Like, you don't. Everything happens all at once, you know?

[B]

But like, yeah.

[C]

You. I identified a lot with, like, having to be like, the kid and an adult at the same time. That's.

[A]

That's.

[B]

Yeah. Desperately looking for somebody as you're getting knocked down on the field by all these big kids being like, tag me out.

[C]

And it's like, there's no one there.

[B]

There's. You got to tag yourself out of this situation.

[C]

It's wild. It's wild.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

The good news is it doesn't get better.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

My friend Casey said to me that it's like always with you.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

You know that feeling of, like, grief.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Like, not something that you, like, kick away. It's just, like, always there.

[B]

Yeah. And, you know, like, Gabriel and I have talked about this a lot. It's like, you know, my mother was a very complicated person, and it was very much like, for most of my adult life, I was in a. In sort of a caretaking position adjacent, you know, was like somebody who was living on her own, but just, like, didn't really have a capacity to, like, fully take care of herself. Her life became very, very small as she got older. But it, you know, it was good, like, because I guess that's it too, is like. I think about, like, weirdly, after she died, I had this and it's my hand again. And I'm sorry. Weirdly, after she died, it, like, that was like the other half of my life. You know what I mean? Like, that was like the. The grounding that I had with, like the real life stuff that you have to deal with. And then all of a sudden it's like that being gone too. It's like, oh, yeah. Now I. I truly have to be like, what am I doing? Who am I? I gotta come up with my own routines. I don't have this person that I have to, like, check in with and take care of on a regular basis.

[C]

Yeah. I remember a quote that Larry David said. Someone asked him, like, I think it was when he was on the COVID of Rolling Stone, like, at the height of Curb youb Enthusiasm. And someone was like, how are you so excited that at, like, 65 you're on the COVID of Rolling Stone? He's like, I don't give a shit. My parents are dead.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And I'm kind of like, oh, I. I think a lot about that quote because it's like, you have to.

[B]

Kids are like, cool.

[C]

You have to, like, reconfigure how you view success because you're, like, so much of. For me, it was like, I want my mom and dad to be proud of me, you know? And then it's like, well, that doesn't matter.

[A]

Yeah, I can relate pretty hard. My mom doesn't have, like, a full understanding of most, especially, like, the industry, but my dad did. Did he? Because he was a movie fan, but he also was a stagehand. He was Iatse grip.

[B]

Is that true?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, that's awesome.

[A]

Yeah. He was Fox 5, 10 o' clock news in New York. He was local one, shop steward of the union. Every time we watch a movie, Johnny, right there, that's the bug. That's the bug. Union puts food on your table every night. Don't you forget it. And now I'm fucking crazy. Pro union labor, fucking friendly.

[C]

Yeah. You seem so pro union.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, I know. Well, you know, my show, of course, is shot five cameras Six microphones and only one person.

[C]

And Devin, who only wants us to talk about the song.

[B]

You're paying people to operate, all of them, but they're on. You call it extended weekend.

[A]

They're on there on Smart List. But every once in a while, I'm just like, fuck, I wish my dad. I wish I could call my dad about this. Of course, so, like, some of the successes don't feel as rich, you know what I mean? Because you're like, the guy I want to tell about.

[C]

Well, yeah, it's like, I think of, you know, the Michael. The Kobe picture with him in the of. And the statue after he won it, and he's just, like, holding it and he's just, like, contemplative and sitting there and everyone around him is, like, spilling beer. And this is the guy who worked harder than everyone to get it. And he's holding the trophy. He doesn't look happy. He looks like, now what? You know, and like, not that winning an NBA championship is like your parents dying, but you. You are left with this void of like. Well, I was kind of scared about that. I kind of thought about that in the back of my mind since I had a relationship with my parents. So, yeah, now that happened. So now what am I scared of? And, like, now what? And now what am I not like, you know, it's a whole new person.

[B]

Yeah, well, it's the same thing. Talking about sort of, like, routines and, like, the little stuff. It is like, I feel pretty strongly that, like, you know, it's easy to have the people that come after you. You know what I mean? Like, there's lots of people like that that you pick up in your life and, you know, like, family and whatever. But especially as you get older, there's less and less people in front of you and ahead of you that you can, like, see and are living and, like, creating those relationships and fostering those relationships and finding those people. I think has been like, my big thing that I'm doing right now is, like, finding those people, which is really nice because it's like, you know, I have my aunt who is, like, the most wonderful woman. I got my dad, who's cr. Crazy, but I love him.

[C]

And is he living out here?

[B]

No, he's in Florida. Hell, yeah, he's in Florida.

[C]

So you have. So he has to be crazy, right? That when you come in my hand,

[B]

you just can't see it.

[C]

Oh, you have the Florida.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Sometimes you have to pretend to be crazy just to get into Florida.

[C]

Yeah, they have a customs yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

Just sort of make sure. See what you're holding.

[A]

Yeah, they're like, okay, you see a lizard on the ground, what do you do? Eat it?

[B]

All right, come on in.

[C]

Okay, your car starts to have trouble, what do you do? Leave it on the side of the road? Come on in. Yeah, you're Florida.

[B]

They need it for the scrap metal. If you're not willing to contribute some way, of course, you got to go.

[A]

That really is interesting, Vic. I haven't really thought about that. How. Because also moving to California and when my dad died, we kind of lost touch with his side of the family who were kind of tenuous connection at best. And then moving across the country, all my family, so I don't have many. The people who are like quote unquote ahead of me, let's just say older at this point are sort of comedy peers that have been doing it longer, you know, like my, like my 50 something and 60 something comedy friends. And I'm like now I'm like looking to them as to like what the future holds.

[C]

Don't look to them.

[A]

Yeah, well, I know it's not ideal, but I'll tell you what, I'd much rather look at Matt Besser's life than look at any one of my blood relatives lives.

[B]

It's like whoever that person is that you can sort of talk to who's like been through it or lived through it at the very least, like even if it's not good news, just has some sort of a news, right? Yeah, yeah, some sort of on news.

[C]

And for you, that's Kaliyah.

[B]

Yeah,

[A]

well, he's a roommate, so.

[C]

Nice of you.

[A]

Yeah, I was the right hand man in his fucking weird cult. You have been listening to Staying Alive with John Gabris and Adam Pali. A smartless media production in association with Sirius xm.

[C]

Produced by Devin Tory Bryant and Anne Harris. Engineered and edited by Devin Tory Bryant, who also wrote the music, Associate producer

[A]

and video producer is Matty McCann. Social media producer Tommy Galgano.

[C]

Assistant engineer Kyle McGraw. Special thanks to Jared O' Connell at Sirius XM.

[A]

Executive producers are John Gabris. Ooh, me. Adam Pally. Ooh, you. Will Arnett, Jason Bateman, Sean Hayes, Richard Courson and Bernie Kaminsky. Do us a favor. Just rate and review the podcast. It actually helps.

[C]

Just so everyone knows we do not have a discord.

[A]

Don't reach out to us.

[C]

See us on the street. Walk the other way or you'll catch hands. Serial.