Proof Of Life: 100 Daps

Summary

Staying Alive with Jon Gabrus & Adam Pally

Episode: Proof Of Life: 100 Daps
Date: July 16, 2026
Network: SmartLess Media

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Episode Overview

In this lively and honest catch-up, Jon Gabrus and Adam Pally serve up a classic proof-of-life check-in after a legendary week in New York City. Still riding high after the Knicks’ championship win and the chaos of Del Close Marathon, the two best friends and comedians reflect on the joys and aftermath of hard partying, health scares, and midlife wellness efforts. With deep dives into colonoscopies, gluten intolerance, running shirtless, and why you never really outgrow feeling like the villain in an airport bathroom, this episode balances raw humor with surprisingly sincere notes on health, friendship, and changing habits.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Knicks Championship & New York Energy (00:16–03:33, 18:26–21:29)

• Gabrus and Pally recount the electrifying atmosphere in NYC the night the Knicks clinched the championship, aligning with the Del Close Marathon. Both describe it as the happiest kind of bedlam.
• Jon: “I got as about as close to like a happy death as I could. Watching game five with you and your family and our friends was such a treat.” (01:33)
• Adam: “It was just so truly like everyone… I haven’t seen New York that positive in a while. It had fun blackout energy.” (02:05)

The Health Check–Colonoscopy & Celiac Surprise (03:40–04:50, 06:09–09:06)

• Adam shares he had a colonoscopy, recommending all male listeners get checked. Results: clean bill of health, but on the cusp of celiac disease.
• Adam: “I will remind our male listeners out there to get them. They’re very helpful and worth it and I got a nice clean bill of health. But what they did find was I’m on the cusp of celiac disease.” (04:08)
• Gabrus empathizes, sharing similar GI woes and the absurdity of hitting mid-forties and being turned down for a colonoscopy: “Throw me on the slab early!” (06:09)

Coping with (and Laughing About) Health Procedures (09:06–10:43)

• Adam hilariously recounts being post-anesthesia, attempting to leave the hospital to catch the Knicks parade: “I was telling the nurses... I piss orange and blue!” (08:46)
• Both discuss the notorious prep: “You violently get everything out for, like, six hours.” (07:03)
• Anecdotes about bathroom disasters, the legendary Master Cleanse, and public restroom horrors.

Midlife Fitness – Running Shirtless, Pushups, GLP-1s (02:40–03:40, 12:06–14:21)

• Gabrus shares he's signed up for a running race, training mostly shirtless for “inspiration and 25 minutes of sun on the tits.” (02:47)
• Both compare running stats and mutual encouragement, with Adam revealing consistency in both running and pushups.
• GLP-1s (weight loss injections) have had an impact on their stomachs, energy, and some unintended social scheduling: “First time you overdo it on a GLP-1, it’s so bad.” (12:13)
• Pally: “You can’t go undefeated... It’s like a baseball season. You want a winning record!” (16:31)

Wellness vs. Vices – Negotiating Changes (05:00, 05:21, 13:33, 13:49, 16:09)

• The dilemma of fitting wellness into a lifestyle built on treat-yourself behaviors — indulgence, wellness, repeat.
• Gabrus (re: celiac whiskey research): “I would love to be a health and wellness podcast with a whiskey sponsorship.” (05:15)
• Pally: “Zinn should be our sponsor.” (05:29)
• Discussion of their “winning record” approach to self-care and not expecting perfection.

Family, Kids Away at Camp, and Parental Freedom (13:40–14:21)

• Adam details sending kids to camp and the unique, fleeting freedom it offers parents: “There’s an even better time… when all of their kids are at camp age.” (13:49)
• Adam and his wife immediately schedule an adult getaway to Colorado.

Legendary Del Close Marathon Stories (18:53–28:16)

• Fond recollections of the marathon and NYC comedy scene, running into old friends, and performing while still in the afterglow of the Knicks win (and several drinks deep).
• Gabrus details the chaos: “Me and Besser are passing a joint, storming through the city. Everything is electric. We roll in. Match game is on stage... I strip down to a Speedo and goggles.” (21:29, 22:28)

Improv Highs, Friendship, and Making (Silly) Memories (22:31–28:16)

• The absurdity escalates: “I had my Michael Phelps show right before, so I did it in my Speedo… getting my nipple sucked by a friend on stage… this is crossing the line!” (26:16)
• Bittersweet nostalgia for the "let people make a mistake" element of the old improv days.

Random Encounters, High-Fives, and 100 Daps (33:04–35:01)

• Gabrus celebrates feeling at home among NYC strangers: “I got dapped up by, like, hundreds of strangers. It was awesome.” (34:47)
• Adam: “I think parade day, I’ve never high-fived more people.” (34:47)

Dreaming & Scheming – Next Up: Vegas for Knicks Summer League? (35:06–37:42)

• The duo hatches a plan to go to Vegas for Summer League, possibly bringing their comedy crew for basketball/partying/craps runs.
• Gabrus: “We deserve an epic craps run like no one’s ever seen before.” (36:25)
• Adam: “You know what? You haven’t been to Vegas in a while.” (37:42)

Classic Gabrus & Pally Banter – Jack Nicholson Bits & End-of-Episode Goofs (38:01–39:54)

• Exchange a series of Jack Nicholson movie title puns, riffing on their 30 Rock days.
• Gabrus: “I cut the sandwich into five easy pieces.” (38:35)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “It had fun blackout energy… Jesus called it reverse 9/11, and I kind of felt that vibe.” – Gabrus (02:05)
• “I woke up, had some coffee and breakfast, then went to the gym… I was, like, fucking nauseous and beat up and, like, sweaty.” – Gabrus on pushing it with GLP-1 & post-partying (12:19)
• “I was telling the nurses to get me undressed. I had to catch my float… I piss orange and blue.” – Adam (08:46)
• “You live long enough to become the villain. And now that wingtip is a van. Yeah, it’s me now.” – Adam on becoming the guy wrecking the airport bathroom (11:20)
• “This kid was banging his Knicks jersey on the ground, a crowd around him, every time he hits it, people go AHHH!” – Gabrus, recalling Adam’s son’s parade antics (20:29)
• “I got dapped up by hundreds of strangers. It was awesome.” – Gabrus (34:47)
• “We deserve an epic craps run like no one’s ever seen before.” – Gabrus (36:25)
• “If we’re improvising the season, we’re improvising the season, right?” – Adam (40:54)

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Important Timestamps

• Knicks Championship/NYC Vibes: 00:16–03:33, 18:26–21:29
• Colonoscopy & Celiac Discussion: 03:40–04:50, 06:09–09:06
• Midlife Fitness Talks: 02:40–03:40, 12:06–14:21
• GLP-1/Health Meds Logistics: 12:06–16:47
• Del Close Marathon Craze: 18:53–28:16
• Vegas Dream Planning: 35:06–37:42
• Airport Bathroom/Becoming the Villain: 11:01–11:29
• Jack Nicholson Movie Bit: 38:01–39:54

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Takeaways

• Gabrus and Pally blend comedic honesty, brotherly energy, and vulnerable midlife reflection.
• Their approach to wellness is imperfect, evolving, but rooted in sincere mutual support (“winning record” over perfect record).
• NYC, comedy, and community serve as their source of health and happiness as much as any diet or med.
• New York’s rare, collective joy during a championship can revive even the most battered party warriors.
• The next adventure—Vegas with the boys—looms large, and their listeners wouldn’t expect anything less.

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Episode in a Sentence:
A rowdy, real, and relentlessly funny midlife check-in from two friends who partied like champs, paid the price, and still managed to find meaning, memories, and maybe a path toward staying alive — at least until next month’s Vegas run.

Transcript

[Announcer]

Smart.

[Adam Pally]

Less media. Why you. You, I will say. I mean, I saw you last weekend, but you are tan.

[John Gabris]

I was. Yes, I am tan.

[Adam Pally]

You are 10. You were tan last weekend.

[John Gabris]

Yeah, I had. I was coming off a couple of pool days with some friends and then I was in town for the Del Close marathon and the lighting in on the stage was a little reddish.

[Adam Pally]

Right.

[John Gabris]

Because when I popped out in the Speedo for.

[Adam Pally]

That's what they say about Trump.

[John Gabris]

Yeah. I looked exactly like Trump. My hair was blonde and my body was like. Like a dark peach color.

[Adam Pally]

You do look like one of those, like, versions, like, I told you I was going to get a tattoo of ugly knuckles. You do look like a version of Trump drawn in that way with like,

[John Gabris]

if I like an AI fan of his,

[Adam Pally]

of him surfing, it would look like you.

[John Gabris]

Yeah. Or like Trump wrestling. Yeah. Here we are with one of our proof of life.

[Adam Pally]

Yeah, we're alive. Which I think a lot of people, especially from who saw us last weekend. Who saw us last weekend when the Knicks won the championship and the Delos marathon was in New York and everyone was in town. I think people are wondering if we're alive.

[John Gabris]

I. I got as about as close to like a happy death as I could. Like, watching game five with you and your family and our friends was such a treat. Like the fact that I happened to. To be in New York because of the Del coast marathon. Got to go with you and cousin Ben and fudgeing, watch the Knicks win game five and then walk right out into fudgeing bedlam.

[Adam Pally]

It was amazing. And. And it was just so truly like everyone. Everyone has been saying, oh, I haven't seen New York like that in a while. I really haven't. I've not seen New York, like, as positive.

[John Gabris]

And it had like, fun blackout energy.

[Adam Pally]

Yes.

[John Gabris]

Jesus called it reverse 9 11. And I kind of felt that vibe.

[Adam Pally]

Me too. Yeah. It was like everyone was outside unhapp, you know, and it's. I'll tell you that it has not slowed down. Everybody is still like that this week. Everyone's in their next gear. Everyone's high five in each other.

[John Gabris]

Everyone in LA is in Nick's gear. I'm starting to notice how many New York transplants slash bandwagoneers are fucking out. Who cares?

[Adam Pally]

I love it.

[John Gabris]

I don't care. Jump on board.

[Adam Pally]

Me too. I don't care. Yeah, I love it. So why are you so you're chant because of just the pool days or are you because you also look ripped?

[John Gabris]

Well, I've been. I'm doing a running race at the end of August and I've been running a little bit.

[Adam Pally]

Nice.

[John Gabris]

I've been doing that shirtless, as we've discussed, as part of, like, as part of my inspiration for running. I'm like, well, it's another 25 minutes of sun on the tits, so then I'll get out there. Yeah.

[Adam Pally]

Can we run together over the summer? Will you?

[John Gabris]

Yes.

[Adam Pally]

When you're on the island, I would love to do that.

[John Gabris]

Let's go. Yeah. We could run together or we could run at the same time and I don't know if we'd exactly be. I bet we do.

[Adam Pally]

I don't do. I don't. I don't. I don't know.

[John Gabris]

We should take up. You always take so much time to gas me up on these. I got to gas you up. You look great. But also pure that. I know your numbers. I've seen your map. My runs.

[Adam Pally]

I sent you my run.

[John Gabris]

Yeah. You're putting in some miles.

[Adam Pally]

I am. I'm eating miles. And. And I'm also staying consistent with the push ups in between. And it like the whole thing feels like positive on that way. I had to take a slow break this week because I had a colonoscopy.

[John Gabris]

Oh yeah. And they don't let you run during those. Well, they make you lay down.

[Adam Pally]

No, they let me do it on a treadm. It was messy, but I got my

[John Gabris]

results on onlyfans.com Palace Colony fans.

[Adam Pally]

I know I had a. I had a call. My scheduled colonoscopy and I will again remind everyone I was trying to get

[John Gabris]

one, but they wouldn't let me get one till I was 45.

[Adam Pally]

I will. I will remind our male listeners out there to get them. They're very helpful and worth it and I got a nice clean bill of health. But what they did find was that I'm on the cusp of celiac disease.

[John Gabris]

That makes sense.

[Adam Pally]

Yeah. Which is a bummer, right? Because I love.

[John Gabris]

And they can determine that from a colonoscopy.

[Adam Pally]

That's where they find most of it. Yeah.

[John Gabris]

Oh, shit. So I'm wondering because I bet you I'm about to find that out too. Cause I'm pretty gluten intolerant as well.

[Adam Pally]

It was a bummer. It was a bummer because it was like just to hear how intense celiacs can be and then to be like, wait, I. I can't have beer anymore. Or pizza.

[John Gabris]

Japanese whiskey.

[Adam Pally]

Well, so

[John Gabris]

I've been doing some research. Oh, you found. What is this that you found?

[Adam Pally]

This is Indiana whiskey. This is a brand that is made from corn. There's no gluten, just bourbon whiskey. They have two flavors. This one and then another one called Breakfast of Champions.

[John Gabris]

Oh, hell yeah.

[Adam Pally]

Shout out the Indiana Whiskey Company.

[John Gabris]

Hell yeah. Oh, man, I would love to be a health and wellness podcast with a whiskey sponsorship. That would be awesome.

[Adam Pally]

That is the only sponsorship that really makes sense for us.

[John Gabris]

Yeah, we should. We should be doing cigs. We should be doing, like, honestly, Zinn.

[Adam Pally]

Zinn should be our sponsor.

[Announcer]

Wow, you're still drinking soda.

[Adam Pally]

Yeah, it's even a creamy root beer.

[Announcer]

Isn't soda full of sugar and bad.

[Adam Pally]

Nah, Zevia doesn't have sugar or fake like, other sodas.

[Announcer]

Okay, but does it taste like.

[Adam Pally]

Here, try one.

[Announcer]

Oh, this is delicious.

[John Gabris]

Told ya.

[Adam Pally]

Zevia. It's soda made better.

[John Gabris]

No.

[Adam Pally]

Find Zevia, creamy root beer, orange creamsicle, and more flavors at your local grocery store.

[John Gabris]

Well, so how was a colonoscopy? I. Obviously, you know, I've had, like, lifelong gi, but when I told my doctor, he's like, oh, you're only 44. We usually wait till 45. I'm like, well, throw me on the slab early. My shit's all up.

[Adam Pally]

I said the same thing. I was like.

[John Gabris]

He's like, do you have any history of it, though? Any issues in your family? Like, no. And then he's like, well, then you should be okay. I'm like, but to be fair, everyone in my family dies of other stuff before that would kick in.

[Adam Pally]

Yeah, we'll take a look under the

[John Gabris]

hood up the tailpipe. I take a look in the muffler in the glove. Let me get. Let me get in the console.

[Adam Pally]

Hey, the registration is not supposed to be in here.

[John Gabris]

Oh, boy.

[Adam Pally]

I did the same thing. I was like, throw me on the slab, and an opening came up, and I took it. And, you know, the prep is. Is the same. Is like. Like they say it is. It's. It's gnarly, but you drink some stuff

[John Gabris]

that gives you, like.

[Adam Pally]

You drink, like, some hardcore and then a bunch of water, and then you, like, violently get everything out for, like, six hours.

[John Gabris]

And that's, like, the morning of.

[Adam Pally]

No. Well, it depends on when you're scheduled. I like to. I did mine first thing in the morning, like, 6:00am which means that I prepped the night before from, like, 4 in the afternoon on.

[John Gabris]

And that is a little. Change the sheets twice.

[Adam Pally]

Oh, no. Well, I do. I compost everything, so it's a little rough on colonoscopy day. Your cloth diaper Mostly into a coffee filter. One time we used a sifter, and we did find gold there.

[John Gabris]

There's gold in them there buttholes.

[Adam Pally]

There's gold in them holes.

[John Gabris]

The tre. The treasure of the Sierra Pally. You ever see Dickwood? Not in a while, unfortunately. I gotta. I gotta get my together, but so. So then you do that throughout the night, and then. Then in the morning, you. You go in there, you lay on your side, and they.

[Adam Pally]

I don't even know if I laid on my side, honestly, because they put you out. They put you out and like, by the time. And I was tired already from. From the night, so, like, by the time that needle went in my arm, it was literally like, boom, I woke up.

[John Gabris]

And then you wake up, what, one hour later, four hours later? Like, what is it?

[Adam Pally]

I woke up. You wake up, like, two hours later. Yeah. And you feel great. You know, you're like, you're empty. You're starving. You have to wait a little bit to eat. But I came out of it, and it was the morning of the parade.

[John Gabris]

Ooh.

[Adam Pally]

And Danielle was picking me up, and she said that I was. I don't remember this, but that I was telling the nurses and the. And the doctors to get me undressed. I had to catch my float. And they were like, you can't leave yet. And I was like, I. I piss orange and blue. I was screaming, I piss orange blue. I guess.

[John Gabris]

Oh, yeah. You're like, I got to be on Alvarado's floor. I was like, they need me.

[Adam Pally]

They need me. Anyway, I got out at, like, 11 in the morning and was able to make it to my local sports bar with Cole, which was, like, packed. And we had a burger, and I was like, the first thing I ate, I had, like, a burger and a. And a foot of beer. What do they call those?

[John Gabris]

A yard of beer. Yeah.

[Announcer]

Yeah.

[Adam Pally]

I had a foot and a yard of beer and then slept for four more hours.

[John Gabris]

Oh, that sounds like a great day.

[Adam Pally]

It was amazing. It was amazing.

[John Gabris]

And you're gonna put this footage in your next comedy special, right?

[Adam Pally]

Yeah, well, no, no, I think that's. I think that's gonna be a feature we should.

[John Gabris]

We should do. We should put it on our Patreon. We should watch a page. The real medical sicko.

[Adam Pally]

You know, there's like. There's like all these funny stories about Steve Martin and Tom Hanks and Martin short doing, like, doing that. Yeah. And I just kept thinking, like, I don't know, man. I get it. It sounds funny. Whatever. I don't think I'd want, like. I don't think I. I don't. I didn't want to be around anybody. It's because sometimes it gets so intense that you're like, am I going to die on this toilet?

[John Gabris]

Me and my. Me and my roommates in, like, 2005 all did the Master Cleanse diet where you drink, like, lemonade mixed with maple syrup and cayenne pepper. It's supposed to, like, flush your system. We're like, oh, let's all do this together for a weekend. Don't do that. If you have a one bathroom, I'm, like, standing outside the door, like, hurry up, hurry up.

[Adam Pally]

Do it in that smell and like, in the other person's waft.

[John Gabris]

Yeah. You have to do it. Like when. When you put your cheeks on a warm toilet seat. It's always like, I hate that.

[Adam Pally]

It's like when you're waiting. When you're waiting at an airport and someone.

[John Gabris]

Oh, nothing feels worse than a guy comes out of the stall and you're like, am I going right? I have. Based on my timing, my what's going on in my guts and the line of people behind me, I have to go immediately into this sin bin that this guy just fucking got out of.

[Adam Pally]

And, you know, I used to do a bit about that, about seeing the businessman's foot no matter what time of day, under a thing about, like, no matter what time of day you'd go into an airport bathroom, there would be like a dress tip shoe.

[John Gabris]

Yeah.

[Adam Pally]

And you just hear the most violent shitting sounds like.

[John Gabris]

Yeah, it's just IPA flood at these fucking.

[Adam Pally]

I used to do that bit. But you know what? You. You live long enough to become the villain. And now that wingtip is a van. Yeah, it's me now.

[John Gabris]

Yeah, now it's a spare. Now it's a Sperry top with no sock. And it's a fucking.

[Adam Pally]

And it's just screaming. Screaming.

[John Gabris]

It's like, oh, yeah. I mean, I. I've. I've been accused of. Or I've been known to do this upon landing at airports, which is, like,

[Adam Pally]

scary Sometimes I don't like doing. If you're in the air. If you're in the bathroom on the plane, that's not. Something's gone wrong.

[John Gabris]

Nah, I've only had to do that, like, a couple of times. And every time it's in a. And I will say, shout out GLP1s for like, helping me manage that a little easier just by, like, less volume I'm putting in. I'm I'm. My is just a way more under control.

[Adam Pally]

You notice that right away, too, because the first time you overdo it on a GLP1, it's so bad.

[John Gabris]

Yeah.

[Adam Pally]

You're like, oh, is this. Is this not coming out normally?

[John Gabris]

Yeah, I did. I did this to myself on Monday. I had, like. I went out, had some fun with some friends. I shot up Sunday, 10. I'm on 10 milligrams of Zep now. I'm up to 10. Go out Monday, exert myself Monday evening, exert myself Monday morning, have like, a breakfast because I'm working out late. But I also ate blue ribbon sushi and fried chicken the night before, went to the movies, ate some snacks during Toy Story 5, did a little crying, woke up, had some coffee and some breakfast, and then went to the gym. I went to train with Addie and my. I was, like, fucking nauseous and beat up and, like, sweaty. And that day, I just. I even skipped. I did my improv show that night, but skipped the dinner with Durkus and Rogers after, which is the reason we do the improv every month, so that we could have dinner together. And I was like, I'm. I'm fucking. It laid me the fuck out.

[Adam Pally]

No, you got to. You got to. Yeah. No, you got to really watch it. I mean, the couple times that I've overdone it, it's been, like, wildly bad.

[John Gabris]

Some of our former guests, like, friends, like Mitch, he tells me he, like, he'll, like, change the. When he's going to do his shot, like me on social stuff of just like, oh, shit, we're supposed to go away this weekend. Maybe I'll wait till Monday to do it.

[Adam Pally]

Well, I'm having that now because Danielle and I are. You know, the kids are leaving tomorrow morning for.

[John Gabris]

There's a great time in a. In a Jewish child's life when they have a bar mitzvah and become a man. But there's an even better time in a Jewish couple's life when all of their kids are at camp age.

[Adam Pally]

Exactly. And they can.

[John Gabris]

This is like. This is like, in the house. Yeah.

[Announcer]

Wherever.

[Adam Pally]

Whenever. There's no rules. Like, you can. Whenever. You know, it's like, that is an amazing feeling.

[John Gabris]

But you can sleep in. You can go to bed when you want.

[Adam Pally]

School's not starting. It's. It's a whole other thing.

[John Gabris]

Cooking for two, ordering for two.

[Adam Pally]

Everything's cheaper. We spend no money. Everything.

[John Gabris]

But, yes, as long as you don't look at the cost of the camp

[Adam Pally]

while you're yeah, no, I've already factored that. And you know how gambler. You know my math.

[John Gabris]

That's sunk cost. That's some cost.

[Adam Pally]

That's.

[John Gabris]

I don't even count the. I don't even count the cost of the hotel on my. What I spent in Vegas in a week. That's. Credit cards.

[Adam Pally]

Credit cards. That's like. That's the camp. The camp is that if I can keep my, my Uber down in July, we're in a big. But we're we usually. And when I say we, you know, I think everyone who knows us can imagine the emotional load get a little down when the kids leave. So we're gonna combat that this year by taking a vacation the day, the morning after they leave. So in that we're going, we're leaving, we're getting on a plane in two days for like just chilling, eating. We're going to. I don't want. Well, this will come out later, but we're going to Colorado to like a, you know. Yeah. Bougie.

[John Gabris]

Yeah. Going for like a real grown up, relaxing, fun weekend.

[Adam Pally]

Yeah. Do I take the shot tonight or tomorrow morning and then hope that the. That the day of being, you know, like doing.

[John Gabris]

I think take it tonight.

[Adam Pally]

Tonight. Yeah.

[John Gabris]

I think tonight's the best bet because then maybe worst case scenario because I find it's like a day or two later that it's like at its strongest and feels like that would be the day you fly, which is.

[Announcer]

Okay.

[Adam Pally]

I'm okay.

[John Gabris]

Yeah. Yeah. And then like, then hopefully you're fucking fully. Like we, we were talking like it's. It's really funny because you play the game where you're like, oh, shit, I'm actually coming down the home stretch now. Maybe we, maybe tonight I get pizza and I'm like, wait. I'm on this drug to like change my life. And I keep going like, I'll beat this fucking things ass no matter how it goes.

[Adam Pally]

Well, but you know what? It already won. I mean, I, I had this conversation with my dad and Dr. Pally was like, it already won. You're thinking of it to one to one. He's like, you can't. You're thinking about it like every war, but that's not what the drug does. It's like a basketball season or a baseball season. Like you want a winning record. You don't want. You don't. It's not about winning.

[John Gabris]

You don't need to. You don't need to go undefeated.

[Adam Pally]

Exactly. He's like, that's impossible. You're Never gonna do that. It's a. And so he's like, but I seen your eating habits. And I know. He. He said to me, were having this conversation, he's like, I know for a fact you're not eating as many bagels. And it was like so anti Semitic, but so true.

[John Gabris]

Yeah, but I think your Jewish doctor father is maybe the one person who's.

[Adam Pally]

I know, but still, it's like. It's like still. Imagine any other.

[John Gabris]

Hear me say, I think you've had too many babies.

[Adam Pally]

Exactly. Imagine any other. And I was like, God damn. You couldn't have said pizza. You couldn't have said dumplings. You couldn't have said. He's just like. Well. And the truth is, he's right.

[Announcer]

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[John Gabris]

I. I've been feeling really good lately. Like health wise and shit. Except for that day I was laid up sick. But yeah. And the Delcos marathon and Knicks happening in that same weekend was so nostalgic for me. Just not Knicks winning. I wish I had nostalgia for Nick's winning.

[Adam Pally]

I don't remember. No, no, that was a foreign feeling.

[John Gabris]

Yeah. Yeah. But just being back In New York with all my friends and all the old heads and the people who are a generation above us came back too. And where.

[Adam Pally]

Yeah, that was great.

[John Gabris]

Saw Charlie Todd, Kevin Hines. I'm gonna just name drop all these freaks now. Conroy Secunda, Besser. Where I just a Tamanic. All these old heads was such a treat. And I felt, and I, I started to feel like I could do anything and I got fucking annihilated watching we, we were doing shots, smoking weed and drinking Sapporo's and Coors lights at the store, watching the game.

[Adam Pally]

I was gonna say, I can't believe you performed. I left the store. I left the store 20 minutes after you because I was celebrating with my children.

[John Gabris]

Yeah, I. Then me and Besser took off the

[Adam Pally]

second you ambassador left right away. But I, and I was like, I'll meet you there. Because I had, I had full disclosure. I had my, my kids, my children were there.

[John Gabris]

My children with me and your father

[Adam Pally]

and my father and cousins and my kids and I were screaming. We were, we were, we were screaming. I mean Drake was hanging off my, my neck and I was like, go, go, go. So I say and everyone start. Was 20 minutes watching the conference, jumping up and down, doing ch in from Sullivan street, you know, like. And then I called an Uber to get the boys into the Uber with my dad. And when the Uber came and Drake was like delirious at this point, you know, he's nine years old. It was like a.

[John Gabris]

He was pretty worked up during the game. I mean, we had a great moment when we ran to the deli to get more beer. Oh yeah, you took it some candy. And we, the three of us went. And he went, he goes to me and you in line. He goes, you can never have too much candy. We're like, oh yeah, is that right, kid? You're see my wired to the Guild. Oh.

[Adam Pally]

So he was like. So the Uber comes and I'm like, all right, everybody, let's go, let's go. I get Cole out, I get Gigi out. I get my dad into the car. My brother in law, everyone's getting in the car and I'm like, where's Drake? I turn around, there's a crowd of people from the store that have made like a U shape around my 9 year old son who is shirtless with his jersey, banging it on the ground. And every time he banged it, people

[John Gabris]

were going, ah, that, that shit. I know that will work Drake up. That's like his perfect kind of energy. Oh, he was like acting to him,

[Adam Pally]

when he saw me, I was like, drake, we gotta get an Uber. His eyes, it was like as if he was like, I'm drunk with power.

[John Gabris]

Yeah. Like you brought him down to earth. Like you have to like slap across the face. Drake, Drake, wake up, wake up.

[Adam Pally]

We gotta get in the Uber.

[John Gabris]

He was like, like it was fully gummy wormed. Fully gummy wormed out.

[Adam Pally]

Yeah, gummy worm to the brain. And then the Knicks win the championship. It was like he was, it was, it was just the cutest most. It was just.

[John Gabris]

So while, while you're doing that, me and Besser are racing from West Village to the East Village where the UCB theater is just through masses of crowds. People are walking into bodegas and just walking out with two tall boys each and just being like, fuck yeah. I saw a person walk out of a bodega with a 12 pack and had like all their friends waiting outside just handed out cans. I'm. I'm drinking, I'm double fisting. Me and Bessa are passing a joint, storming through the fucking city. Everything is electric. We roll in. Match game is on stage, which is like a crazy fuck around UCB show. That's like an old tradition. Shear told me you could just walk on if you make it in time. So I, I'm going to be Michael Phelps. I strip down to a Speedo and goggles, walk on stage in my Speedo. I have jammed two cans of beer, a joint and a lighter. So I sit down and I just keep taking them out and drinking and smoking weed on stage. I'm blasted from a full. We've been drinking since 8:30. I mean, started earlier, but we, yeah,

[Adam Pally]

we had a beer way. Yeah.

[John Gabris]

Y.

[Adam Pally]

To say that's. We had a beer in the. After the sun was out.

[John Gabris]

Right? For sure. I. Yeah. And. And then of course, sheer is so funny and so good at straight manning. He's like, so what have you been up to, Michael Phelps? And I'm like, oh, you know, I'm still doing 15,000 calories of pancakes. He's like, getting any swimming done? I'm like, not so much. You know, it's like the bit. And so, I mean. And then right after that show is Harold 40, hands like a dumbbeds. Yeah. And you show up. I walk off stage dripping sweat in the Speedo and immediately, thank God Lou Gonzalez there, they start taping. My fucking taping. 40s to my hands. And then me, Betsy, Carl Lippert and mono go right back out on stage. But in this interim, you have arrived and we are like Nick's. Nick's.

[Adam Pally]

Nicks.

[John Gabris]

We didn't get to fully celebrate after. And then. And we posted this photo yesterday. But you don't. Yes, I have this recording and you go, I don't remember taking this. It's me chugging out of one of my 40s and you drinking out of the other one. That's deep to my head. And I in just a little pink bikini. It's so indicative of our friendship of like, we haven't seen each other in one hour. At this point. We're celebrating.

[Adam Pally]

We're like, we should get beers. The. The. The one thing I do remember about 40 hands because so I got my kids in the car and did that same journey on my own. Right. Like, my dad took my kids home.

[John Gabris]

Fun, right? It's. It was like crazy being. It was.

[Adam Pally]

I was like teary, you know, that's when like, after I got like, Drake was so cute and Cole was so. I mean, my year old, like, gave me a hug. He's like, I'll remember this forever. It was like, you know, emotional. My. And my dad was like being like,

[John Gabris]

let's go, let's go, let's go.

[Adam Pally]

You know, like, it was just so fun. Everybody got in the car and then I was gonna go do match game and meet you. And I was walking alone and we. I must have had like, I'm not even exaggerating, a hundred plus text messages from like, you know, people like the like dream people that you would like, the people that were there texting me videos of like.

[John Gabris]

Right.

[Adam Pally]

Like Stiller sent me like, videos from the, the locker room and the thing. So I'm getting those at the same time that I'm getting like, friends from high school and, and, and college and. And then like Stuyvesant Town and like, just like everyone.

[John Gabris]

And Gill and Kroll and Gill and Nick are at the game.

[Adam Pally]

They're FaceTiming us. It's like, yeah, everything's happening. I'm just like taking it all in. It's a slow walk. And then I walk into the. The theater and I see Betsy who has her hands already taped. And it's the first time I'd seen her all weekend.

[John Gabris]

And it's a great. And it's not unusual to run into Betsy and she's got 40 states or it doesn't stand out as too weird.

[Adam Pally]

No, that wasn't. It was more weird that I hadn't seen her all weekend. So she's like, I. A big hug like that. And she didn't realize that she had 40s taped to her hands. And both 40s emptied down my back, boy.

[John Gabris]

Just poured down your back.

[Adam Pally]

Both of them emptied. And I went, oh, my God. And then she grabbed me tighter. I think she thought I was doing a bit.

[John Gabris]

I was like, oh, Betsy, Betsy.

[Adam Pally]

And then finally she realized they were almost. So Lou had to take them off, put two more on. And I left that night with, like, the. My entire back. And I stayed for another, like, 45 minutes. I don't remember what happened because I watched the whole show.

[John Gabris]

Remember what happened that show? And I don't remember.

[Adam Pally]

I don't remember what happened, but I remember getting in the. In an Uber and sitting back and being like, whoop, that's wet. Don't say anything.

[John Gabris]

Yeah, I remember some distinct memories. I. From this dumb show is Mono had his drag show right after, so he did the show in drag. I had my Michael Phelps show right before, so I did it in my Speedo. And so we're just on stage. Carl, Dan and Betsy dress normal. Me and Mano dress like.

[Adam Pally]

Mano was not dressed normal.

[John Gabris]

No. Mano had a mesh. A fishnet shirt over big fake tits and the nipples were sticking through holes.

[Adam Pally]

He was killing me, dude. He was so funny. Yeah.

[John Gabris]

A future guest of the pod. We could get Mono on the next laundry session. And so at one point, Dan Lippert is laying down. First of all, one of the funniest moves ever seen is Carl playing a hairdresser with 40s in his hands and, like, fucking with Dan's hair, like, clanking him in the head with bottles over and over again. But Dan lays down and Mano's like, puts his fake tit in his mouth. And he's like. He's like, oh, thank you, I'm so thirsty or whatever, making some nasty joke. And I go, it looks like you're running out. Let's use mine. And I don't have fake tits on it. I put my real nipple in Lifford's mouth. And I was like, all right, this has gotten to. I'm in a Speedo getting my nipple sucke by a friend on stage. By my six foot seven friend on stage. I was like, this is. Cross the fucking line. Like, that's.

[Adam Pally]

You know what? That's like.

[John Gabris]

We.

[Adam Pally]

I mean, we were talking about it, and I hate to be. To. To be nostalgic for, like, I hate to be like an old guy that's like, everything's to whatever. But right there was a certain sense, like, willing to let you make A mistake.

[John Gabris]

Yeah.

[Adam Pally]

You know, it was like it was the first time that I'd seen in a while. Sorry, my son is coming in. It's dusk in Harlem.

[John Gabris]

It was the first listeners. Adam is ducking lower and lower from the sunbeam that's in his eyes. He's got, he's got fully nasty posture. But I'm looking at it and it's matching how I am default. So it's teaching me a lesson, seeing like maybe I should learn to sit up a little.

[Announcer]

Okay, imagine a honeybee is out here doing her thing in an orchard, lands on a mystery apple blossom, then carries that pollen over to a honeycrisp tree. Fast forward a few months and no exaggeration, something amazing is the Sugar Bee apple. Packed with notes of honey, caramel and molasses, plus an extra crisp crunch. Sugar Bee apples are perfect for snacking, baking and everything in between. Download our new free recipe book and find a store near [e-mail] Sugar Bee apples naturally sweet from bee to you. Carter's has your family covered for every summer. First, first steps, first swim lesson or first sleepover. Our clothes help kids and parents have their best summer ever. Thanks to comfy design and easy dressing details. Generations of families have trusted our must haves for babies, toddlers and kids designed to shine season after season. Visit Carters.com to shop the latest styles or find a Carter's store near you.

[Adam Pally]

You

[Announcer]

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[John Gabris]

That night continued. You and I, we went out after that.

[Adam Pally]

I know, I know. I don't remember that.

[John Gabris]

I drank two 40s of Bud Heavy after all of the Knicks celebration and went out after that.

[Adam Pally]

Oh, you know what I do remember? I do remember being with Dipled. Yeah, yeah, I read that. You know what I mean? I. It's weird. Like they all the nights. That was the. That was the first. Wait, that was Saturday. Saturday night.

[John Gabris]

Yeah.

[Adam Pally]

So that that night I actually was really up and don't remember a lot of it but was not as up as Sunday night where we did like four shows.

[John Gabris]

Yes, that was that was.

[Adam Pally]

That was not okay. That was not okay.

[John Gabris]

We had the Gabriel's 4 show was one of. Was my favorite show of the weekend. It was so ra. It was a great show, though.

[Adam Pally]

We were all that. We were all still in our.

[Announcer]

Our.

[Adam Pally]

In our heads.

[John Gabris]

Yeah, that was.

[Adam Pally]

The ass cats were not the case.

[John Gabris]

No, no, no. And I was like, I should have left and like, left me too strong. I should have ascat was. Was fine. It was good.

[Adam Pally]

It was okay.

[John Gabris]

But coming off of the font one that was like, just friends and so good. And.

[Adam Pally]

And we were all just like, making

[John Gabris]

each other laugh so much. It was such a treat. And then we kind of like, oh, I guess we should do one more, you know, to close it out. And that was just a bridge too far. Like, one, one, one.

[Adam Pally]

It's like we should have just walked away. But you know what? That. And there was a certain.

[John Gabris]

But that's. That's the. One of the most common refrains from Delos marathon is like, next year, I'm going to do less next year I want to do less shows and hang out more.

[Adam Pally]

You know what? I don't. I don't know. And this is me again. Like, this, to me was like, I don't know if there'll be a next year.

[John Gabris]

Well, there. It won't be like this. I'm glad. You know what I mean? Like, there will be.

[Adam Pally]

There will be next year, but it changes and. And it always grows or it shrinks and like, you just gotta catch one

[John Gabris]

where it won't be the first. DCM of mom. Of mom Donnie Stan. With the Knicks winning and. And Puerto Rican parade that night, and the World Cup. The World cup is going on. People are in Brazil jerseys and Knicks jerseys in the street. That's Saturday night.

[Adam Pally]

The World cup needs to end. Guy will say that the World cup is driving me crazy right now.

[John Gabris]

I'm too drunk all the time now. I'm killing me.

[Adam Pally]

Yeah.

[John Gabris]

Like, oh, let me sit down, watch a little Us. And I'm like, oh, let me have a couple of Bud Heavies.

[Adam Pally]

Well, you know my area is insane, right?

[John Gabris]

Yeah. I was in Echo park last night while Mexico was playing. It was awesome. Like Uber. You can tell the scores.

[Adam Pally]

Last night, the cops. Cops set up on all four corners of the park across my street and put their sirens on. And I think they were just watching

[John Gabris]

the game just by just. Just going off.

[Adam Pally]

Yes.

[John Gabris]

Just get that. Saturday night, after all the shit we were talking about. Chugging two 40s at 12:30 at night after partying all Day, then going out into the streets. We got separated at some point. Then you guys were in line to go to this bar that we all ended up not going into. And when I rolled up, I had a like 4 foot 11 woman in a Knicks jersey and backwards hat, like, on my shoulders.

[Adam Pally]

Yes.

[John Gabris]

I. I had. Me met a woman in the streets who was like. I was like, nick's in like everyone.

[Adam Pally]

She's an improv head.

[John Gabris]

No, she wasn't. She was just a Knicks person. So many people. Because I. I just had an open Hawaiian shirt, a blue and orange Hawaiian shirt on.

[Adam Pally]

I'm wearing the same shirt still.

[John Gabris]

People were going like, this guy's got his tits out. And then this chick just goes like, hell yeah. And like daps me up and I'm

[Adam Pally]

like, anyone call you the fat Jewish.

[John Gabris]

Oh, no, I wish.

[Adam Pally]

Because. Because that's the vibe. Vibe you had that night with. You know what I mean? And like, that's fat. You're in the. You're in Soho walking around. That's like fatuous territory.

[John Gabris]

Yeah. I mean, my blonde. I have a blonde non curly fro in this moment. But. So this woman, I pick her up, she's like. She's like, I can't see what's going. I pick her up and put her on my shoulder. And we're walking and we're like. We're laughing. And she goes to me, she goes. She goes, are you gay? And I was like, no, I'm sorry. I apologize for being straight. And she's like. She's like, I am. I'm like, that's awesome. She's like, okay. And we're just. I think she needed to be like, this isn't sexual.

[Adam Pally]

You're not gonna kill me, right?

[John Gabris]

I was like. I was like, no, I just. Was right. I just scooped you up. I thought you wanted to be picked up. Sorry. Yeah.

[Adam Pally]

I'm telling you, Gabris, we've known each other for a long time. No one says that with their eyes.

[John Gabris]

Pick me up. Hey, stranger, pick me up. Over your head. She was giving. She was giving me the pick me up look.

[Adam Pally]

You know the one where they look over at. Over their shoulder at you while they're running away?

[John Gabris]

Yeah. The one where they're trying to get into their hotel room but the key's not working. And they're getting. Looking, glancing back and forth at you, getting more and more nervous and stressed. That's just them saying, come over here. Pick me up, you big lug. But it was funny. I walked up to the crowd and everyone's like, who is that? And like, I was like, I have no idea. People were like, you didn't know who she was? I was like, no, dude, I can't got on that crosstown walk. I. I have already the kind of look and. And style and face to make people kind of casually interact with me already on this night where everyone is. I got 100 daps. I got dapped up by, like, hundreds of strangers. It was awesome.

[Adam Pally]

Oh, I don't. I don't. I think parade day. I've never high fived more people walking from. From the bar to my apartment to my house. Like, people were high fiving me. It's. And I'm telling you, it's still going on.

[John Gabris]

It's awesome. Energy is still alive. I'm so. I'm. I'm stoked to get back there for a little bit in a couple of weeks.

[Adam Pally]

Well, you know what I really want to do is say it. Let's go watch the Knicks at summer league. The vibe is going to be so.

[John Gabris]

In Las Vegas.

[Adam Pally]

The vibe is going to be so good. All the boys are going. Brunson Cat. They're all going just so they can, like, celebrate the win.

[John Gabris]

Let's go. Let's do it. That's next month, right?

[Announcer]

Right?

[Adam Pally]

It's in like three weeks. Yeah. I think it's like July. I think their first game is like the 13th of July. Dude.

[John Gabris]

I'm actually going to be just getting back from the east coast, too. Could be pretty.

[Adam Pally]

I mean, I could fly back with you. My last show on the east coast. My last show on the east coast is on, like, the 11th.

[John Gabris]

Let's.

[Adam Pally]

Let's just go right there. Let's just go right there, dude. Combine our comps.

[John Gabris]

Yes. I'll tell the.

[Adam Pally]

I'm going out for cigarettes.

[John Gabris]

Be back in four days. Dude, I. I would love that. We could probably get a nice little crew to go to that, too.

[Adam Pally]

Oh, I'm sure. Well, Doug and Dan will definitely jump on.

[John Gabris]

Yeah. And maybe even Gilly, he might make that move.

[Adam Pally]

Yeah. You know, Gilly is a secret gambler. I know Gilly is a secret gambler and he's fun to play craps with. You know who else might?

[John Gabris]

It's time. It's time we hit a couple of hard tens. I haven't been to the casino.

[Adam Pally]

Me too. And I haven't. And God knows I haven't had one

[John Gabris]

in like a decade.

[Adam Pally]

I was gonna say I haven't had a good run in a while, but.

[John Gabris]

No. Yeah, I could go for I, if, if, if we get the chubby skinnies and if we get the bachelor party crew back together again, that's going to pop off. If we for sure Dan, Doug and Gil there, we deserve an epic craps run like no one's ever seen before.

[Adam Pally]

Meal and a lobster meal and like.

[John Gabris]

Yeah.

[Adam Pally]

And, and, and not spending so much time at the casino during the day. Cuz we're just like walking around at the Thomas and Max Center. That's connect.

[John Gabris]

Yes.

[Adam Pally]

Come on.

[John Gabris]

On.

[Adam Pally]

There's a podcast, you know, an keeps talking about it because an chases the dragon like we do.

[John Gabris]

An turns out she's less of a secret gambler then.

[Adam Pally]

Oh no. Then more everyone knows and is concerned. I didn't know that. But there's a, there's a podcast studio in the Win, which is where they do summer league, like everything. I mean we should just do it. Come on.

[John Gabris]

Who do I got to test? Let's get, let's get the 15th string guy from the Knicks. Let's get like, I mean that would be so funny.

[Adam Pally]

Like Tyler Kak.

[John Gabris]

Yeah, that's exactly who I was thinking of. Like let's get Tyler like newest white guy with. Who's like, I got that on.

[Adam Pally]

Yeah, yeah. Our victory cigar.

[John Gabris]

I, I think that would be a fucking. I think that's a genius plan for us, man. I, I think, I think it's actually a really good idea for us to go to Las Vegas.

[Adam Pally]

Yeah. My business manager said it. You know what, you haven't been to Vegas in a while.

[John Gabris]

Yeah, my divorce mediator is like, hey,

[Adam Pally]

you should go to Vegas.

[John Gabris]

Who ostensibly is becoming my business manager manager. Unfortunately she's managing my business.

[Adam Pally]

All right, nice. Bars, bars, bars, bars.

[John Gabris]

Attacks.

[Adam Pally]

I do want to see that movie that Tim Burton's doing where all the rappers attack all of America.

[John Gabris]

I used to do the Mars attacks impression in school. Like when the teacher would turn around, we would just go like, can you

[Adam Pally]

believe that had a cast like a Wes Anderson film?

[John Gabris]

Yeah, it's got Jack Nicholson and that's crazy.

[Adam Pally]

Nicholson is like full on demented.

[John Gabris]

Yeah. He's like, he's like, I just get me a salami sandwich in the ocean right now.

[Adam Pally]

I thought this was Mortadella.

[John Gabris]

I cut the sandwich into five easy pieces. This was a bit we used to do on the 30 rock set. Me and a Tamanic. We used to just do Jack Nicholson impressions. But he always tries to shoehorn his own movie titles into it. I was, I was golfing last night and I hit one. One Flew right over the cuckoo's nest. We just do, like, most elaborate setups to get to is him saying his own titles.

[Adam Pally]

Did you see that? There was a bat, man.

[John Gabris]

We missed the train. Turns out it was Depart.

[Adam Pally]

Where's the restaurant? Chinatown.

[John Gabris]

We're going to Chinatown. That's where my anger management courses are.

[Adam Pally]

I haven't seen my mother in a long time. She's departed.

[John Gabris]

This is you giving the eulogy. It's your mom's room. People are like, we don't. We don't like this bit at all.

[Adam Pally]

Am I holding my hair back?

[John Gabris]

I'm like, you know, Wayfarers on.

[Adam Pally]

She was an easy writer.

[John Gabris]

This. Let's make sure this tombstone is shining. Oh, man. Nice P. Stay alive.

[Adam Pally]

I was. We almost get it at the same time. I like that. Let's try to do it now. Let's change the game from now on on to try to signal each other to both decide to do at the same time. Yeah, I like that.

[John Gabris]

All right, I'll still. If someone wins, they win.

[Adam Pally]

They win. I mean, with competition, you can't take

[John Gabris]

that out of it. We're gonna keep that alive.

[Adam Pally]

Of course. Hate the player.

[John Gabris]

Yeah. Hate us. Hate the podcast.

[Adam Pally]

Don't hate the podcast. Well, it's good checking in. I'm glad you're alive.

[John Gabris]

I'm glad you're alive, too. Let's get. Let's get that fitness in this summer, and let's get to Vegas. Let's, you know, let's figure it out.

[Adam Pally]

I think the view, now that we've laid it down, the viewers expect it.

[John Gabris]

Well, this is like us trying to be like, now we kind of have to do it now. We can ask Sirius to be like, yeah, it's called pay for, like, one hotel room.

[Adam Pally]

Hey, if we're improvising the season, we're improvising the season, right?

[John Gabris]

Let's fucking go. You have been listening to Staying Alive with John Gabris and Adam Pali, a Smartless media production in association with Sirius xm.

[Adam Pally]

Produced by Devin Tory Bryant and and Harris, Engineered and edited by Devin Tory Bryant, who also wrote the music.

[John Gabris]

Associate producer and video producer is Matty McCann, social media producer Tommy Galgano.

[Adam Pally]

Assistant engineer Kyle McGraw. Special thanks to Jared O' Connell at SiriusXM.

[John Gabris]

Executive producers are John Gabris. Ooh, me. Adam Pally. Ooh, you, Will Arnett, Jason Bateman, Sean Hayes, Richard Corson, and Bernie Kaminski. Do us a favor. Just rate and review the podcast. It actually helps.

[Adam Pally]

Just so everyone knows, we do not have a discord.

[John Gabris]

Don't reach out to us.

[Adam Pally]

See us on the street. Walk the other way or you'll catch hands. Last week when we went to the Hamptons, when the kids got out, when the kids finished school after the dcm, I hit the the spot and I got a sesame non toasted scooped out, which is like, who the fuck am I? The guy at Bagel Boss looked at me, but he was just like, you want to scoop that? I was like, yeah.

[John Gabris]

He's like, why?

[Adam Pally]

I was like, I don't know, like

[John Gabris]

I think I've changed maybe I think I'm getting better.

[Adam Pally]

He's like, nah, you're mess.

[John Gabris]

Trust me, you're not. I don't know you, but trust me, dog.

[Adam Pally]

You want to buy good food?

[John Gabris]

I don't even want to meet the old one. Yeah.

[Adam Pally]

He's like, you want to buy something at the back? Yeah, I'll take it.

[John Gabris]

You're trying to get a bag, bro.

[Adam Pally]

Yeah. I'm like, yeah, I'll take that. And, but, but please scoop it out.

[John Gabris]

Smart.

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[John Gabris]

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