← Stories Podcast: A Bedtime Show for Kids of All Ages
Stories Podcast: A Bedtime Show for Kids of All Ages
Throwback: The Boy Who Loved Cheese Too Much
00:21:20
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- [00:01]
Amanda Weldon
Hello. Welcome to Stories Podcast. I'm your host, Amanda Weldon. Today's story is a throwback episode. Tune in to hear one of our classic stories from the archive that you might have missed the first time around. We have Stories Podcast merch, available@storiespodcast.com shop. We're also on cameo for all of your personalized video message needs. And don't forget to follow us on Instagram Stories Podcast if you send us a drawing of your favorite scene or character, we'll share it on our feed. Now, here's a word from our sponsors. As parents, we know how quickly family time can turn into scrolling time. With everyone defaulting to their own devices after a long day, wouldn't it be great to have an active option the whole family can enjoy? Something fun for those cozy fall nights when no one wants to leave the house? We've found the answer. Nexplayground an active game system where your body powers the play. It's 100% motion driven gaming. No controllers or wearables needed. Just move naturally to play. The game library is packed with family favorites. Join Bluey in a game of Keepy Uppy, Go on adventures with how to Train youn Dragon, Dance with Barbie, Pop Bubbles in Gabby's Dollhouse, or Master some moves with Kung Fu Panda. Even better, Playground is kids safe with no ads in app purchases or mature content. It's the perfect way to turn screen time into active family time this fall. Want to learn more? Visit nextplayground.com that's nextplayground.com to explore active family gaming today. Thanks. Enjoy the episode the Boy who Loved Cheese Too Much Klaas van Bommel was a Dutch boy and once upon a time he lived on a dairy farm with his family. He was a stout lad with rosy cheeks and a thick middle. His hair was an orange somewhere between carrots and sweet potatoes. It was snipped flat level under his ears, mostly because his mother cut it by putting a bowl on his head and trimming whatever hairs peeked out, nipping them like cats with garden mice. Oftentimes after dinner, his mother was known to wail that Klaas stomach had no bottom. He was like a well that swallowed anything and everything and then just echoed for more. He ate sausages and stroopwafels. He ate bitterballen and herring. He ate everything his mother put in front of him and most of what she hid in the cupboards. But his favorite. His favorite was cheese. Being a dairy farm, there was never a shortage. Hard bitter cheese and soft milky cheese. Filmy sliced cheese and crumbly blocked cheese. Big wheels of cheese all sealed up in wax and stinky cheese with flavor so thick you could see it floating in the air. Klaas ate it all, and when his parents tried to control his portions, he would steal the cheese from his sister's plates and eat that too to fight his ferocious appetite. Klaas parents then thought they could just keep the cheese hidden. They did not account for Klaas heightened cheese scenting powers, though. Like a bloodhound, like a cheese hound, he sniffed out every slice, block, and wheel and ate them all up in a single night, ate until his stomach was swollen and he felt sick and sore. Next they tried to lock the cheese away in a cabinet high up in their wall. This seemed like it might work until Kloss realized he could stand on a chair. He dragged one over and then smashed the lock with an old knockwurst sausage until it fell broken to the ground. They found him the next morning, sleeping soundly on the kitchen floor. In one hand was a wedge of Swiss. In his other was the knockwurst nod to a nub. The rest of the cheese was gone, but Kloss's bulging, grumbling belly told a pretty clear story. What will we do? His mother said to his father. They stood together among a snowdrift of cheese wrappers, their greedy boy snoring soundly at their feet. He's going to eat us out of business. We tried locking the cheese, answered his father. This time I'll try locking the Kloss. We can't lock up our boy. I'm not going to put him in a cage. I'm going to put him in his room. I'll be the lock. That night, after Kloss went to bed in his garret room, his father closed the boy's door and then sat outside it, broad back to the old wooden surface. Sure enough, an hour or so later, he heard the knob shake and rattle. The door thumped weakly into his shoulders. Back to bed, Klaas, he said. No cheese tonight. No cheese. Kloss sputtered. But, but, but. That's enough, Kloss, his father answered. You get some sleep. Muttering to himself, Kloss got back into bed. He heaved a sigh and then looked out his round bedroom window at the rolling pasture of his dairy farm. The night was warm, and he cracked the window to let in the breeze. It carried in, cooling the air and bringing the smells of hay and cows and, of course, cheese. Klas breathed in deep and then stared up into the moon. Some people Said the moon was made of cheese. He could believe that, especially on a night like tonight. It was full, a bright and waxy yellow white that looked like nothing so much as a big fat wheel of natural cheddar. He licked his lips. He just couldn't help it.
- [06:20]
Daniel Hines
If I could bob like a butterfly, if I could shoot like a star I would fly to the sky and I travel so far just to eat the moon. If I could buzz like a bumblebee.
- [06:51]
Sponsor/Ad Voice
If.
- [06:52]
Daniel Hines
If I could soar like a sprite I would tear through the air to that mouth watering sight and I'd eat the moon. I would eat cheese so sweet Cheddar, brie, Swiss and blue. Bring a spoon to the moon and I'd eat that up too. If I could flit like a firefly if I could sail like a swan I'd devour, eat for hours till the whole thing's gone. If I could eat the moon.
- [08:02]
Amanda Weldon
Kloss stopped singing for a moment. Was that bells he heard? He cocked his head, growing suddenly still. There it was again, a high silvery bell sound. But where was it coming from? At the window. He rolled and flung it open wider, peering down into the buttery moonlight. There, bobbing in the moonbeams, were three lovely little ladies, each no bigger than a cheese knife. They smiled and danced, their wispy wings nearly invisible. They had no bells. It was their laughter Kloss had heard echoing bright and silvery. Fairies. Dutch fairies. They were wearing very pretty dresses, each a different color. Green, red, and pink, Boy, they called in through the open window. You love cheese, boy. Yes, it's my favorite. I love Gouda. I love Swiss. I love brie. Yes, we heard the song, said a fairy in green. Come with us. We have all the cheese you could ever want. Piles of it, said the red. Mountains of it. Giggled the pink. Really? Cried Klass, already standing, eyes greedy and wide. We'll build you a house of cheese. A mansion, a palace. Okay, klaas said, pulling on his wool socks and coat. Suddenly his face fell. He froze, one sock half on his pudgy foot dangling limply. My dad's blocking the door, he said. I can't get out. Leave that to us, said the green fairy, zipping past. We're on it, said the Red, following fast. No sweat, agreed the Pink. Flitting by. They buzzed little balls of bobbing light through Kloss's room. In a graceful dive they swept down and through the keyhole. A moment later Kloss could hear the steady snorting snore of his father, carefully he opened the door. The fairies danced happily. Their twinkling magic had put Kloss's father out cold. Quiet as he could, Kloss followed the fairies down the stairs and out the front door. Now for a quick ad break. We'll be back with the rest of the story after this. If you'd like Stories Podcast and other favorite kid podcasts ad free. Subscribe to Wondery Kids on Apple Podcasts as the air turns crisp and the holidays draw near, comfort becomes the best gift of all. Quince delivers layers that last sweaters, outerwear and everyday essentials that feel luxurious, look timeless and and make holiday dressing and gifting effortless. Quince has it all. $50 Mongolian cashmere sweaters made for everyday wear. Denim that never goes out of style. Silk tops and skirts that add polish and down outerwear. Built to take on the season. Perfect for gifting or upgrading your own wardrobe by working directly with ethical top tier factories, Quince skips the middlemen and offers prices 50% less than similar brands. I got a featherless quilted long puffer coat from Quince and it has become my go to fall layer. It's just the right amount of warm as the days get cooler and the verdant pine color is absolutely perfect. I love wearing it and knowing that Quince works only with factories that pay workers fairly and use sustainable materials makes me love it even more. Step into the holiday season with layers made to feel good, look polished and last. From Quince. Perfect for gifting or keeping for yourself. Go to quince.com stories for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada too. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E.com stories to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com stories this is an ad for Nanimals.
- [12:20]
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- [13:14]
Amanda Weldon
Where are we going? He puffed. A land of cheese, said the green fairy. A world of cheese, said the red. A whole universe of cheese, said the pink. And then they all laughed. That silver bell laugh again. Without hesitation, they led Klaas through the pastures and into the forest. Klaas had been in these woods many times with his father, but they seemed stranger now. They seemed wilder, weirder. The kind of place fairies might live. The kind of place a boy might disappear into one night and then never find his way home again. His heart began to pound. Had it always been so loud he could hear it in his ears, Louder than his footsteps. In the dark of the forest, the fairies were bright as bobbing torches. By their light, Kloss was able to pick his way through the trees and bushes and brambles. He turned to look behind him, but it was nothing but a sea of darkness, as velvety nothing black as a dairy cow's spots. Come on. Klaas. Called the fairies, getting ahead of him now. We are almost there. Can't you smell the cheese? A breeze wafted through the woods, carrying the smells of cheeses, sharp and blue and aged and smooth. I smell it. Kloss cried, running nose first towards the delectable scent. He soon emerged into a grassy clearing in the middle of the woods, the kind the old timers had always called a fairy ring. He thought it was just a saying, but how wrong he had been. The fairy ring was alive with light and laughter. Hundreds of fairies swirled through the air, bobbing and weaving on gossamer wings. They traced intricate patterns around each other, somehow never colliding. The silver bell sound of their laughter seemed to fill the air. Kloss took in all the magic with wonder, but wonder wouldn't feed his greedy belly. For that, he needed cheese. Where is it? He asked the fairies. I smell it, but I don't see it. His three fairy companions emerged, drifting out of the group's twirling dance. Look again, said the green fairy. Klaas blinked, and suddenly he saw it. There in the center of the fairy circle was a picnic blanket. Spread out next to it was a basket overflowing with cheeses of all shapes and sizes and smells. Finally, Kloss hollered, pushing through the fairy cloud and falling onto the basket. By the time his fairy friends flew over, he was already two wheels deep. He had a hunk of stinky Limburger in one fist and a wedge of creamy Brie in the other. Would you like Some more? They asked. Yes, bring me all the cheese. The fairies laughed and began to bring him cheese. Kloss didn't see where they magicked it up from, and he didn't care. He sat on the picnic blanket and ate and ate and ate. The fairies kept going, bringing cheese even faster than he could eat it. Munster brie, Swiss Gouda, and more. They stacked and piled it around him until it seemed to Klaas that he was living in a castle made of cheese. With towering cheese walls on all sides. It was a heaven. The greedy Klaas ate and ate and ate. He ate cheese by the slice, wedge and wheel. He ate cheese until his face was smeared with it and his hands were caked with it. He ate cheese until his belly was as big and round as the moon. And then kept eating cheese until finally he couldn't possibly fit another bite. Not a crumb. Not a morsel. Why have you stopped? The Green fairy asked, flitting overhead. There's still more to eat, said the red belly. Up, cheese boy cackled the pink. I can't, Kloss moaned. I'm too full. I need to rest. Sorry, but you wanted the cheese and we brought it. But I'm done. The fairies flew in close. Up near Kloss's eyes, he could see their stern little faces under all their glow and glitter. The Pink Fairy leaned in, nose to nose with him. You're done when we say you're done. Kloss opened his mouth to reply, but the Green fairy filled it with a log of goat cheese. And by the time he finished chewing that, the Red Fairy had a wedge of some stinky blue ready. And by the time he had finished chewing that, the cheese balls around him were starting to shiver and sway. Stop. It's too much. It's going to fall. He wanted to scream, but he found more cheese shoved in his mouth. The great cloud of fairies were all fetching cheese now, and their stacks seemed to loom over his world. They wouldn't stop. They wouldn't let him stop. His stomach felt like it may pop. The walls of cheese started to topple. They blotted out. The moonlight blocked the fairy light. They rained down on Kloss and swallowed him in darkness. He tried to move, but he was stuck, tried to breathe, and found his mouth full of cheese. It was too much. He was buried under cheese and it just kept falling. He felt it getting heavier and heavier. His mouth was full. His belly was full. It was all too much, and he was going. The last thing Kloss heard before passing out was the fairies laughing. The sound of tinkling silver bells on the wind. The next morning, as the sun was just starting to light up the world, the boy woke up in his own front yard, empty save for sparkling morning dew. What? What happened? He said, or tried to say. He found his mouth was full of half chewed grass. Blech. Kloss spit it onto the ground and then pulled off a few blades that had stuck to his tongue. He looked all over but saw no sign of the fairies or the cheese. Had it been a dream? Kloss thought for a moment that it might have been, but then he noticed his belly still felt heavy and there were smears of yellow around his shirt. Not a dream then, but something, that's for sure. Kloss shook his head. One thing was definitely true. He had finally, at long, long last, had his fill of cheese. He hurried back inside and washed up before his parents caught him out and managed to get presentable in time for breakfast, where he shocked his parents by just some toast. Over time, Kloss realized the fairies had done him a favor. He found himself swollen and sick less often and now he only ate as much as a normal growing boy, which as any parent will say, is still quite a lot. But it wasn't as desperate or greedy as it had been before. Kloss ate what was given to him and never ever stole extra cheese ever, ever again. Well, maybe just a nibble. The end Today's story, the Boy who Loved Cheese Too Much was a Dutch folktale adapted for you by Daniel Hines and performed for you by me, Amanda Weldon with an original song by us both. If you would like to support Stories podcast, you can leave us a five star review on iTunes. Check out all of our merch available@storiespodcast.com Shop Commission a special video on Cameo. Follow us on Instagram oriespodcast or simply tell your friends about us. Thanks for listening. Hey parents. We make Stories podcast for your child and you. And that means we'd like to know more about what your child listener thinks about our podcast. And we'd like to know a little bit more about you, the parent. So we're asking you to fill out a short survey with your child. As a thank you, we'll send you a chance to win one of three $100Amazon gift cards. Fair deal. Check out the survey@starglowsurvey.com that's starglowsurvey.com.