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Queen
Hello.
Narrator/Announcer
Welcome to Stories Podcast.
Amanda Weldon
I'm your host, Amanda Weldon.
Narrator/Announcer
Today's story is a throwback episode. Tune in to hear one of our classic stories from the archive that you might have missed the first time around. We have Stories Podcast merch, available@storiespodcast.com shop. We're also on cameo for all of your personalized video message needs. And don't forget to follow us on Instagram Stories Podcast if you send us a drawing of your favorite scene or character, we'll share it on our feed. Now here's a word from our sponsors Parents I think we've all had those.
Amanda Weldon
Times when everyone in the family is off on their own personal devices. Wouldn't it be great if you could find an activity that everyone will agree on, Something that's both active and fun.
Narrator/Announcer
At the same time?
Amanda Weldon
Imagine that our family has found an amazing new solution called Next Playground. It's an active game system for families.
Narrator/Storyteller
Where your body powers the play.
Amanda Weldon
It's 100% motion driven gaming. No controllers or wearables needed. Just play naturally. And the games are so great and immersive. Go flying in the world of how to train your dragon, dance with Barbie, pop bubbles in Gabby's dollhouse, or master some moves with Kung Fu Panda right from your living room. Even better, Next Playground is kids safe with no ads in app purchases or mature content, Next Playground is your feel good solution to those long summer days.
Narrator/Announcer
Want to learn more?
Amanda Weldon
Visit nextplayground.com that's n e xplayground.com to explore active family gaming today.
Narrator/Announcer
Thanks Enjoy the episode.
Narrator/Storyteller
The Princess and the Pea Once upon a time, there was a lonely prince. He lived in a lonely room in a lonely castle on a lonely cliff that overlooked a lonely kingdom. You may think that's an awful lot of lonely and safe to say. The prince would surely agree with you. He hadn't always been so lonely. When he was a boy, his father, the king, would take him hunting and fishing and riding and all sorts of exciting things. They would leave before the sun showed her face on the horizon and stay out until it set below the cliffs. Just having adventures and meeting interesting people. His mother, the queen, would sometimes come along, but she never much liked hunting or fishing or riding. She didn't like adventure either, come to think of it. And people? Definitely not. They gave her a headache, especially the interesting ones. Now none of that is to say she wasn't a good person, because she was. She loved her husband and loved her son and, well, she felt that her life was plenty full of love with Just the two of them. Thank you very much. So one winter, when the king got sick while hunting in the rain, the queen got so scared that she locked down the whole castle. And the prince found himself suddenly and completely stuck at home. No matter, he thought to himself. My father will be well again soon and will be back out adventuring in no time. Unfortunately for the prince, things rarely work out the way we want them to. The king didn't get better. In fact, he got much, much worse. The doctors couldn't help him. Nor could the wizards or the maesters or the clerics. It got so bad that the people of the Lonely Kingdom started to wonder if the king was fit to rule. The prince must needs take over, they whispered to each other in the villages and towns and markets. The prince must marry and become the king. And soon. When these whispers reached the castle, there were two very different reactions. The prince thought marriage was a fine idea. A princess to be his bride would surely make the lonely castle feel less, well, lonely. The queen thought marriage sounded terrible. Strange women coming around to compete for her son. She loved her baby boy and didn't much like the idea of sharing him. Not with a princess, not with anyone. But a kingdom must have a king. So, as father grew sicker, the queen relented.
Queen
We will allow one princess to visit.
Narrator/Storyteller
At a time, each one for a day and a night, she proclaimed.
Queen
They will be given my most royal test to prove they are worthy of my son. If they fail, they will leave before lunch.
Narrator/Storyteller
The prince thought that was a little harsh, but it was better than nothing, so he agreed. The very next week, the first princess arrived at the Lonely Castle. She was clad head to toe in flowing pink silks and riding upon a pink painted elephant that blew lavender butterflies from its snout as it trumpeted along. She charmed the prince during the dinner with her bright smile and her quick wit. And the prince thought himself very lucky to have found such a wonderful princess on the first try. After dinner, they all went to bed. The queen prepared the princess's room special with the biggest, fluffiest, most comfortable feather mattress ever seen in all the land. It was squishy as a marshmallow and near as tall as a lamp post. In fact, it was so tall, the princess needed a ladder just to get into it. This seems a little high, she said as the queen stopped by to say goodnight. Nonsense, replied the queen.
Queen
Nothing but the best for you.
Narrator/Storyteller
So the princess laid down her head and slept soundly the whole night through. The next morning at breakfast, she asked, so when is the Royal test. The queen smiled.
Queen
First, tell me how you slept last night.
Narrator/Storyteller
I slept wonderfully.
Queen
You failed the test.
Narrator/Storyteller
Guards, get her out of the castle immediately. So the princess was pulled from the castle and thrown on her elephant and chased out of the kingdom. You see, the princess didn't know it, but the queen had hidden a single pea underneath the giant mattress. One lousy, lumpy, green pea. The queen told her maids that a true princess would be so delicate, even a single pea would keep them up all night. The truth was that she wanted an impossible test so she wouldn't ever have to share her son. But she didn't tell her maids that. She didn't tell anyone that, not even herself.
Narrator/Announcer
Now for a quick ad break. We'll be back with the rest of the story after this. If you'd like Stories Podcast and other.
Narrator/Storyteller
Favorite kid podcasts ad free.
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Subscribe to Wondery Kids on Apple Podcasts.
Narrator/Storyteller
The next day brought another princess. This one came covered in red and orange velvet, like tongues of fire, riding on a camel with seven humps, each a different dazzling color of the rainbow. She was dazzling, too, and soon dazzled the prince. But the next morning at breakfast, the queen smiled and said, first tell me.
Queen
How you slept last night.
Narrator/Storyteller
I slept wonderfully.
Queen
You failed the test.
Narrator/Storyteller
Guards, get her out of the castle immediately. So the princess was pulled from the castle and thrown on her camel and chased out of the kingdom. Night after night, week after week, this same scene happened. The prince could only watch in horror as each princess, kind and charming and bright, was thrown from the castle and onto their ostriches and alligators and hippogriffs and chased out of the kingdom. He begged the queen to tell him what the test was, but she would.
Queen
Only smile slyly and say, a true princess will know.
Narrator/Storyteller
And even though the queen thought she was just pretending, she was exactly right. A hundred nights and nearly as many princesses later, came the most humble girl they had yet seen. She wore no bright colors, but a simple homemade dress of warm wool. She rode no exotic animal but a young paint pony with a braided mane. She was a princess in title only, from a duchy far and away, one lonelier even than the prince's. That night at dinner, she and the prince talked and smiled. They laughed until they cried. What the princess lacked in wealth and glitz, she made up for tenfold in wit and charm. The prince was in love like he had never been before. He knew that if it was possible, this princess would pass the test. So it was much to his dismay that the next morning, when the queen asked how she had slept, she replied, I slept wonderfully, thank you.
Queen
You failed the test.
Narrator/Storyteller
Guards, get her out of this castle immediately. But this time the prince yelled, wait, Mother. There must be some mistake. We've had a hundred knights and a hundred princesses, and she's the only one I want to be my queen. I demand she be given that test again. The queen grumbled and mumbled and complained, but in the end, the prince got his way. That very night, as they headed off to bed, the prince took the princess's hand and said, I don't know what the test is, but I know you'll pass. You're a true princess, if anyone is. I'll do my best, said the princess, ever humble, but she was already thinking. You see, this princess wasn't particularly delicate, but she was very, very smart. So as she went to bed and climbed the ladder and tucked herself in, she thought about that morning the queen had asked her how she slept. But why would that make her fail a test? Unless. The clever princess rolled out of the bed and slid down the ladder and used all her strength to lift up the edge of the great puffy marshmallow mattress. To her delight, she saw a single, lousy, lumpy green pea resting underneath.
Princess
A pea.
Narrator/Storyteller
Smart as she was, the princess instantly understood what it meant and what she had to do. So the next morning, when the queen.
Queen
Asked, tell me how you slept last night.
Narrator/Storyteller
The princess groaned theatrically and said, ugh. Well, the truth.
Queen
Yes, the truth.
Narrator/Storyteller
Okay, yesterday I was too embarrassed to say it, but go on, go on.
Princess (continuation)
I've got a kink in my neck.
Narrator/Announcer
And an ache in my back and.
Princess (continuation)
I think that your mattress is worse than the rack.
Queen
Oh, I'm sure it wasn't bad as.
Princess
All that I didn't sleep a wink well, maybe I didn't sleep a wink.
Princess (continuation)
Now I've got a knot in my.
Narrator/Announcer
Knee and a mat in my hair.
Princess (continuation)
And I think that your mattress is part grizzly bear oh.
Narrator/Announcer
Oh, I don't think that you're judging.
Princess
It fair I didn't sleep a wink well, perhaps I didn't sleep a wink.
Princess (continuation)
Now I've got a leg that won't bend and a leg that won't straighten.
And I think that your mattress was.
Princess
Designed by Satan oh, but I think it's your imagination I didn't sleep a wink well, could be I didn't sleep a wink well, all right. I didn't sleep a wink Enough.
Narrator/Announcer
Enough.
Narrator/Storyteller
You've passed the test.
Princess
Okay.
Narrator/Storyteller
And so the princess proved herself true. And soon thereafter, married the prince, who all agreed, got the best of the bargain. The queen was upset for a time, but soon she learned to love her new daughter. And if the princess always kept the secret that she was smarter than she was delicate, well, that was probably for the best. The End Today's story, the Princess and the Pea, was adapted by Daniel Hines and performed by me, Amanda Weldon.
Narrator/Announcer
If you would like to support Stories podcast, you can leave us a five.
Narrator/Storyteller
Star review on itunes.
Narrator/Announcer
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Narrator/Storyteller
Thanks for listening.
Podcast: Stories Podcast: A Bedtime Show for Kids of All Ages
Episode: Throwback: The Princess and the Pea
Date: August 26, 2025
Host: Amanda Weldon
This throwback episode offers a playful, engaging retelling of the classic fairy tale "The Princess and the Pea." Presented in Stories Podcast’s signature style, the story explores themes of love, cleverness, and the importance of seeing beyond appearances. The tone is warm, whimsical, and accessible for children and families, bringing fresh humor and new character depth to the familiar tale.
Quote:
“You failed the test… Guards, get her out of the castle immediately.” (Queen, [05:56]/[07:21])
Quote:
“Wait, Mother. There must be some mistake. …She’s the only one I want to be my queen. I demand she be given that test again.” (Prince, [08:56])
Song-like Response:
“I didn’t sleep a wink, well maybe I didn’t sleep a wink. Now I’ve got a knot in my knee and a mat in my hair, and I think that your mattress is part grizzly bear…” (Princess, [10:53])
On the Queen’s True Motives:
Comic Song Complaints:
A Quiet Lesson:
| Timestamp | Segment Description | |-------------|---------------------------------------------------------| | 01:46-02:41 | The prince’s childhood and isolation | | 04:21 | Queen announces the royal test | | 04:37-07:52 | Series of princesses fail the hidden pea test | | 08:56 | The humble princess fails, prince protests | | 10:09-11:16 | The princess uncovers the pea and fakes discomfort | | 11:21 | Queen concedes; princess passes the test | | 11:26-11:57 | The happy ending and subtle lesson |
Stories Podcast’s rendition of "The Princess and the Pea" is lively, clever, and filled with moments that delight both children and adults. The adaptation pokes gentle fun at the original tale’s reliance on "delicacy," instead celebrating intelligence, humor, and wit. Amanda Weldon’s narration balances playful exaggeration with warmth and reassurance, making this a memorable and charming story for families to enjoy together.