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Story Pirates
Peter’s Picks: Chicken on a Motorcycle/The Unlucky Man
00:22:22
Peter chooses some of his favorite stories from the Story Pirates archives.
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Peter
Hey, Story Pirates podcast listeners. Peter here. And boy, are you lucky. So lucky. The luckiest in fact, because today I have used my exceptionally good taste and keen eye for hilarity to choose two of my favorite stories from the Story Pirates archives. We're calling it Peter's Picks. You're gonna love these two stories, and you'll be very interested to hear why I picked them. Coming up right after a few words for the grownups. Wow. Hi. I love Story Pilot. I'm very different from everybody. Confusion is the step before curiosity. Okay, that's a really funny idea. We have to send that in. I just get some joy when I hear other people giggling. I believe all the things in my story. Human beings are just able to create pirates. Welcome back to Peter's Picks. Now, my first pick is a classic story pirate story called Chicken on a Motorcycle. Written by two hilarious brothers, Mason and Stanford. This story, from the very beginning had it all. These brothers wrote in a full backstory for the superhero that is Chicken on a Motorcycle. And. And not only that, wrote in a repeated theme song. It felt like an old timey action adventure serial that you might hear on the radio in the 40s. So we took the style and energy that was right there on the page and we threw it onto the podcast. If you've never heard this one before, you're in for a treat. And here are the authors to introduce it. Hi, I'm Mason. And hi, I'm Ted. I'm Beck. We're from Arizona. This is our story, Chicken on a Motorcycle. Look, it's a bird. It's a plane. No, it's definitely a bird. Oh, sorry. My bad. Yes, that's definitely a chicken. Yeah, he's riding a motorcycle. Cluck cluck. Boy. I really misread that one. He's a chicken on a motorcycle. Chicken on a motorcycle. Chicken on a motorcycle. Yeah. Yeah, he's on a motorcycle. Yeah. Welcome back to the continuing adventures of Chicken on a Motorcycle. Today's episode, where Eagles Drive. Mr. Mayor, please. Mr. West, hello. Hello. Yes, members of the press. I'm here to address the recent crime spree that our fair city has suffered at the hands of those evil cars and their evil friends, the evil eagles. Now, I assure you that there is nothing to worry about. We have our finest superhero on the case, Chicken on a Motorcycle. I'll take some questions. Yes. Yes, Harold. Is it true that Chicken with a Motorcycle came to Earth from outer space? And is it also true that he now speaks all languages? And did he not come from two regular chicken parents? But he wanted to be more than just a chicken. So one day he stole a pizza man's motorized scooter and turned himself into the superhero that we now all know and love. Yes, yes, and yes. Of course we all know his backstory. Why did you even ask? Frankly, those were wasted questions. Anyway. Is there anything else, Mr. Mayor? How is chicken on a motorcycle going to handle all this car and eagle crime? Ah, yes, thank you. A much more relevant question. As for those evil cars. Thank you. Did someone say evil cars? It's the evil cars. No. That's right. And we're here to kidnap the mayor. Whoa. Whoa. Oh, no. Who will save us? Well, look, It's a chicken on a motorcycle. Chicken on a motorcycle. Chicken on a motorcycle. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's on a motorcycle. Yeah, that's right. And I'm here to put an end to your evil four wheeled ways. I'm taking all you cars to the impound. I've got a better idea. How about we chase you? Oh, no. I didn't see that one coming. All right, motorcycle, let's drive away. After him, boys. No. Chicken on a motorcycle. Don't leave us. Get back here, you chicken. You can't out drive us. Watch me. Come on, motorcycle. We gotta lose these evil cars to the desert. Motorcycle, watch out for those camels. Whoa, that was close. Did we lose'em? You'll have to try harder than that to lose us. Quick, Motorcycle. To the jungle. Motorcycle, watch out for those monkeys. Whoa, that was close. Did we lose them? Still here. Aw, man. Let's try the ocean. Motorcycle, watch out for those krill. Wow, that was close. There's no way those cars could still be right behind you. Oh, come on. Let's try one more place they'll never think to look. The suburbs. Looks like we finally lost them. Oh, did you? Evil cars. My worst enemies. We've got you cornered now. Chicken on a motorcycle. What are you gonna do? Let's show em, boys. Eagle. Eagle. Eagle. Oh, no. It's my real worst enemy. An eagle. That's right, it's me. An eagle. Evil, evil, evil cars. Evil, evil, evil cars. Evil, evil, evil cars. Evil cars. And now all hope is surely gone. Get em, cars. Oh no. Motorcycle. All hope is lost. Who will save us? Look, it's a bird. It's a plane, Jerry. No, it is clearly a bird again. Oh, right. Sorry. That's a duck. Yes, and he's playing a trumpet. That's right. I'm a duck and I've got a trumpet. Duck with a trumpet. My true only Best friend and the only other little or non flying bird not in the Arctic that normal people know about. Oh, it doesn't matter. There's nothing that this duck can do to stop me and the evil cars. Eagle, I think you're forgetting the one thing that makes cars blow up. What? What makes cars blow up? Why? Jazz of a quack, quack, quack. Jazz, jazz, jazz. Those cars blow up when they hear jazz. Oh no. All that jazz blew up my cars. That's it. I don't need a gang of evil cars to defeat a chicken and a duck. I'm an eagle and nothing can stop me. Oh yeah? What about more jazz? Chicken, where'd you get that saxophone? I found it. A clock. Clock. Clock for jazz. More jazz. More jazz. That evil eagle hates the jazz. Ah, too much jazz. I'm out of here. I'll get you next time. Chicken on a motorcycle. We did it. You certainly did. Chicken on a motorcycle. Mr. Mayor. And you too, Duck with a trumpet. Don't thank me. Thank jazz. Oh, I think we can all agree that that was too much jazz. Wow. That really was too much jazz. The end. I'll be back with another of my picks right after a few words for the grown ups. A new year means new opportunities. And if you've been thinking about starting your own business, let this be your sign to take the leap. Of course, this decision comes with a lot of questions like how do I get started? How do I come up with a brand? How do I sell stuff to people? What am I even going to sell? Well, if you have all those questions, you can take a deep breath because Shopify's got you. Shopify makes it simple to create your brand, open for business and get your first sale. With Shopify, you can get your store up and running easily with thousands of customizable templates. No coding or design skills required. All you need to do is drag and drop. Their powerful social media tools let you connect all your channels and create shoppable posts to help you sell everywhere people scroll. And Shopify makes it easy to manage all the details like shipping, taxes and payments from one single dashboard, allowing you to focus on the important stuff like growing your business. The best time to start your business is right now. And with Shopify, your first sale is closer than you think. Established in 2025. Has a nice ring to it, doesn't it? Sign up for your $1 per month trial period at shopify.com/realm. All lowercase go to shopify.com realm to start selling with Shopify today. Shopify.com realm aren't adventurers supposed to have a specific purpose? What are you doing on this quest? Just meeting strangers? Yep. My purpose is to have no purpose, Though I sort of find purpose as I go. My basket. It's missing. I have tried many means of defense, but none have yet proven successful. I just wish someone would succeed in getting that darn sword. I am under attack by this ruffian. I want to be big and strong and fight evil. I have hope that if you show up at her door, she might listen. Want to help me? Yell at them with your sword in a threatening manner. Sidequesting is a fantasy podcast about avoiding the main plot. It follows Ryan, an adventurer who's willing to help just about anyone out as long as they're not being asked to deal with that scary wizard everyone keeps talking about. Subscribe today on your favorite podcast app. Welcome back. Now, my second pick for this inaugural Peter's Picks episode is the Unlucky Man. Now, what I love about this story that the author, Mia, wrote is that the main character, Dave, could not have a clearer and funnier game. Game? What am I talking about? Like a board game or a sports game? No, a comedy game. Sometimes when we read a story, we're looking for a character that has a clear, funny thing about them. And in this instance, Dave, the main character, his game is being the unluckiest person on the planet. When a character's got a fun, clear game, all you need to do is point them in the direction of an adventure and see how that game reacts to all the obstacles that you throw in the character's way. For Dave, it means things get worse and worse and worse. And for us, it gets funnier and funnier and funnier, as you shall soon see. Here's the author to introduce it. Hi, my Name's Mia. I'm 10 years old, and I'm from Massachusetts. This is my story, beyond Unlucky Man. Some people are lucky, but this guy's not. He's Dave, the unlucky man. Hi, I'm Dave. Oh, shoot. Oh, I'm so sorry. Did I break the microphone? Oh, that is my bad. He's Dave, the unlucky man. Hello. Welcome to Ralph's Rest Stop, the only rest stop for the next 400 miles. Boy, am I glad to see you. Could I use your restroom, please? Oh, well, of course you could. Oh, thank goodness. If it weren't permanently clogged. Permanently. Oh, Dave, what an unlucky man. Oh, excuse me, sir. Oh, hello. I didn't see you there. Well, I'm sorry, but I couldn't help but notice you nervously trying to cross this deserted desert road. Ah, yes, you see, whenever I try to cross the street, I always somehow manage to get splashed by a passing car. Well, I don't think you have to worry about that. You're right, of course. I don't see a car for miles, and there certainly aren't any puddles. Oh, man, what an unlucky Dave. Hello, and welcome to my fancy bookshop. Wow, you certainly have a lot of books in here. Yes, and they're all very rare and expensive. I'll be sure to be careful. I'll just take a look at this one book here at the end of this very long single shelf. What? No. My books. The shelves. The toppling over like dominoes. Somehow, every shelf, even shelf, not anywhere near the other shelves. How? Oh, no. Now my lamp has caught fire and it's spreading. My books. My books are ablaze. I have never seen a fire spread so quickly. Oh, thank goodness. The sprinklers. They're putting out the fire, but somehow making it worse. Oh, it's too late. My, my beautiful books are nothing but watery ash. Complete destruction. Complete devastation. I'm ruined. I'm ruined. Why? And how much for this one? Get out. He's Dave, the unlucky man. Ah, finally. I'm home. The one place where things aren't quite so unlucky. Especially up here in my attic. What was I doing up here anyway? Oh, right. I was just going to store my summer clothes for the season and then head on down with my fall sweaters. All right, time to head back down to. Oh, great. Looks like I've locked myself in my attic again. I guess there's nothing to do but sit down on this old dusty trunk and wait for someone to. Just my luck. When will my fortune change? If only someone would give me a sign. Hey, what's this? An old map. This is it. The sign I was looking for. I'm going to follow this map just as soon as this attic door that's holding all of my weight decides that it wants to open up for. Oh. Ow. Well, time to start my quest for luck. So Dave went on a quest to find some luck. And that's exactly, exactly what he did not find. In a dark cave filled with bats. So Dave waded through a muddy swamp and crossed a great green meadow. And the number of snake bites he received was quite a bit more than zero. So many snakes. Ass. Stop it. Then bird started pecking his head. Yeah, bird started pecking his head. The bird started pecking his head, started pecking his head, started pecking his head, started pecking his. They kept pegging his head. Oh, you really can't even imagine how much those birds liked pecking his head. And just when you thought that the birds would stop pecking his head, stopped pecking his head, they started pecking his head again. Oh, those birds are still pecking his head. Yeah, those birds are still pecking his head. Soccer birds are pecking in his head. That's okay. I think we get it. Okay, they're done. Okay. Okay, I've reached the end of the map, but I don't see anything here. Hello, Dave. So you've come to find some luck, eh? Yeah, how'd you know that? Lucky guess, I guess. But it, but it seems like before you are two potions. One will make you the luckiest person alive and the other. Yes. Will make you. Yes. It will make you. Yes. A normal amount of lucky. Oh. Oh, you know what, that's actually pretty win win for me. I guess I'll take the one on the right. All right. Here you go. And good luck. Oh, oh shoot. I was, ah, supposed to disappear in that puff of smoke. Oh, well, I'll just walk into my house. The door's right here. Anyway, good luck. Okay, here goes nothing. All right, now to turn around and head home. Hopefully my return trip won't be as unlucky. Here I go. So Dave headed down the mountain, but only a few birds pecked in his head. And he only got a single snake fight. And that cave full of bats was only sort of half full of bats. And now he's back. Hello and welcome back to Ralph's Rest Stop. Wow, you look like you've been on quite an adventure. I sure have. It looks like some birds were pecking at your head. Only an average amount. And is that a snake bite? Only one. Can you believe it? Have you been in a cave full of bats? Hardly. It was barely half full. I feel like the luckiest man in the world. Honestly, that sounds like an average amount of luck at best. And with average luck, I'm ready to take on the world. But first, first, I don't suppose your permanently clogged bathroom is fixed. Well, it turns out, my friend, that today is your lucky day. It's fixed. Wow, what incredible luck. Here I go. Oh, I should warn you though, that the bathroom is full of birds. Boy, bad luck. He's Dave the unlucky man. The end. Oh, thanks for listening to Peter's picks. And a big thanks to today's authors, Mason, Stanford and Mia. We'll be back later in the week with another brand new episode. Until then, stay creative and stay kind. Bye.