The Kid That Has a Bad Name/CatsNews

Summary

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Story Pirates – “The Kid That Has a Bad Name / Cats News” (April 2, 2026)

Episode Overview

In this hilarious and heartwarming episode, the Story Pirates team brings to life two brilliantly imaginative stories written by young authors: “The Kid That Has a Bad Name” by Emmett (age 9) and “Cats News” by Autumn (age 6). Meanwhile, a running storyline sees Megan confronting her latest insecurity (a bad review) by attempting to get her first driver's license—leading to comedic chaos and surprising life lessons. The show also features lively author interviews and a “Story Love” segment with more unique kid-generated tales.

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Key Discussion Points & Segments

[01:21] Megan’s Driving Dilemma: The Lost Theater, the DMV, and Insecurity

• Megan, Eric, and Nimini arrive in Ohio so Megan can revisit her artistic roots at a beloved theater, only to find it’s been turned into a DMV.
• Humorous banter about why they're really at the DMV, exposing Megan’s obsession with reviews and her wish to heal old wounds by revisiting her ‘glory days.’
• Megan, lacking a license, is talked into taking the DMV test, shifting the episode into a mix of driving lessons and personal growth.
  • Quote (Megan, 02:48): “Doth my eyes deceive me? That’s the Pence, Ohio Public Theater building. But instead of the old marquee out front, there’s a huge sign that says this is the DMV!”
  • Quote (Eric, 02:14): “Wasn’t it more like we all drew straws and Eric and I got the short straws?”
• Nimini and Eric agree to help Megan, seeing it as a distraction from her negative spiral about the bad review.

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[05:08] Story #1: “The Kid That Has a Bad Name” by Emmett (age 9, CA)

Story Summary

• A young boy is burdened by his unusual name: “Do you like hot dogs?”
• Everyday situations (attendance roll call, cafeteria line) devolve into confusion as everyone answers the question rather than using his name.
• At home, his mom reassures him of the family tradition of odd names: “Your grandfather, who’s on first...”
• He realizes his name makes him unique—even if it’s sometimes inconvenient or misunderstood.
• At school, he inspires the principal to embrace his own infamous name: Principal Butt Face.

Notable Moments & Quotes

• Recurring Joke: Every attempt to use or ask about the protagonist’s name leads to the question, “Do you like hot dogs?” being answered literally.
• Quote (Mom, 10:14): “First of all, it’s tradition. You come from a long line of people with special names. Your father is named, ‘How’s it going?’”
• Quote (Principal, 12:03): “My name is Principal Butt Face.”
• Sketch is full of Abbott & Costello–style play on words, escalating confusion for everyone involved.

Author Interview [12:19]

• Lee asks Emmett about his inspiration—prompted by silly names he and his mom would invent, e.g., “Do you like hamburgers?”
• Playful meta-banter as Lee keeps responding literally to “Do you like hamburgers?” as if it’s a real question.
• Emmett explains more about the principal’s name and expresses his love for inventing ridiculous names.

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[14:30] Megan’s Driving Test: Comedy of Errors and Personal Growth

• Megan preps for the road test with questionable answers (confusing left lane/right lane), admitting she’s never really driven—just acted like she has.
• When Megan tries to start the vehicle, chaos ensues (spins in a circle, pulls parking brake by accident).
• Eric suggests Megan take on the persona of “Nancy,” a Fast & Furious-esque character, to channel confidence.
  • Quote (Eric, 18:06): “Your name is Nancy and you’re an undercover government agent sent to join the crew… and your catchphrase is, ‘I don’t play or pay fare.’”

[19:34] DMV Results: Triumph, Twist, and Heart

• Megan impressively aces the test only to learn she can’t get a license—she’s not a local resident (“Pence, Ohio residency required”).
• Moment of reflection: Megan realizes her worth doesn't depend on external reviews or tangible accomplishments.
• Shared appreciation between Megan and the DMV employee, who reveals a love for theater and Megan’s past as a performer.
  • Quote (DMV Employee, 25:02): “I only saw [your show] like 30 times. I love the theater and especially loved your production.”

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[27:27] Story #2: “Cats News” by Autumn (age 6, MA)

Story Summary

• A news program for cats, starring feline anchors Joe and Mia, covers stories for “cats and kittens.”
• Gags about Joe insisting he’s not wearing a tutu, absurd live reports (cat swimming in a pool and hating it, the eternal mystery of the green laser dot).
• Sports: “The Pouncers and the Itty Bitty Kitties tied for the championship after both teams got bored and laid down on the field.”
• Weather segment is derailed as the meteorologist, Muffins, chases the animated weather-map graphics.
• The story of the elusive green dot escalates and ends with the “pet cat” favoring Mia over Joe.
• Finale: news team chaos, playful arguments, and the show signs off with “Good night and good lick.”

Notable Moments & Quotes

• Quote (Joe, 33:41): “Yes, it’s been an emotional day. I don’t know if you noticed, but I’m wearing a tutu.”
• Quote (Narrator, 31:39): “And he’s chasing the graphics on the animated weather map again. I'm gonna get you, little cloud!”
• Quote (Sports, 29:39): "The Pouncers and the Itty Bitty Kitties tied for the championship after both teams got bored and laid down on the field."

Author Interview [35:02]

• Autumn describes her real-life inspiration: her playful cat “Fanny” who’s always hiding in boxes.
• Lee asks Autumn to ‘meow’ to call her cat (which naturally does not work).
• Discussion about whether cats can have pet cats and why Joe wears a tutu.
  • Quote (Autumn, 36:57): “Well, because he’s a ballerina and that’s his secret and he wasn’t supposed to be wearing it to his office.”

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[37:32] Story Love Segment: Community Creativity

Three more inventive stories by kids are shared and discussed by Lee & Peter:

[38:01] “This Mirror is Definitely Not a Mirror” by Madeline (age 10, UK)

• A scuba-diving wizard’s magic mirror turns into ice cream, then a pink door, then a trap!
• Lee and Peter riff on "mirror world" and childhood theories of mirrors.
  • Quote (Madeline): “I am Timmy Johnny alfie Robert the 39,565th, and I am also a scuba diving evil wizard professor.”

[42:28] “Jackson and His Dancing Pants” by Cameron (age 6, NC)

• Jackson’s dancing pants catch fire (dragon-related), he battles a crocodile, and makes newspaper headlines—all while accompanied by pet mouse Joey.

[44:17] “The Spider Who Got Lost” by Cohen (age 6, OR)

• A friendly spider and friends lose their way, party again upon return, with a humorous series of fake-out endings (“Just kidding! That’s not the end”).

• Lee and Peter celebrate the creativity, humor, and plot twists, encouraging kids to keep submitting stories.

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Memorable Quotes

• Eric (about Megan's driving): “You spun us in a perfect circle. Just like they do in the Swift and Irritated movies. Some stunt people train for years to do that. I’d be impressed if I wasn’t so terrified.” (16:59)
• Megan (on her name): “Swoon and collapse.” (03:03)
• Lee (to Autumn): “If you were a reporter for Cats News Station, reporting about your cat, what would you talk about?” (35:23)
• Autumn (on why Joe’s pet cat likes Mia): “Because Joe mostly just cares more about his work. And Mia cares more about the nature around her.” (36:41)

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Episode Structure & Key Segments

• [01:21] – Megan’s Ohio road trip & drive test begins
• [05:08] – Story 1: “The Kid That Has a Bad Name” (Emmett, 9)
  • [12:19] – Author interview with Emmett
• [14:30] – Megan’s driving hijinks
• [19:34] – DMV results and reflection
• [27:27] – Story 2: “Cats News” (Autumn, 6)
  • [35:02] – Author interview with Autumn
• [37:32] – Story Love: Bonus stories from more young authors

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Takeaways

• Creativity has no age limit: Both Emmett and Autumn’s stories turn simple ideas (weird names; cats as news anchors) into comedy gold.
• Embracing individuality: The “bad name” story encourages kids to see their uniqueness as a strength.
• Resiliency and self-worth: Megan’s journey highlights the importance of inner achievements and memories over external validation.
• The power of community storytelling: The Story Love segment celebrates the sheer inventiveness of kids everywhere.

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Final Thoughts

This episode is laugh-out-loud funny, inventive, and full of heart, with enough puns and twists to keep listeners of all ages engaged. The theme that emerges: whether you have a “bad name” or just locked your keys in a spaceship-car, what makes you special is your creativity and perseverance—and a willingness to laugh at life’s absurdities.

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Transcript

[Lee]

Hey, Story Pirates podcast listeners. Lee here. On today's episode, Megan learns to drive. And if you've ever experienced someone learning to drive, you know it can be harrowing. And of course, we have two brand new stories written by kids and more story love with Lee and Peter. It's all coming up after a few words for the grown ups. Hey, grown ups. Lee here see Story Pirates live. Our amazing touring cast, including Eric, will be visiting some east coast cities this spring to perform some of your favorite songs from the podcast. And they'll take suggestions from kids in the audience to create a brand new story that will only be seen once. Best of all, all of our upcoming shows are on weekends, so no need to worry about school nights or bedtime routines. We'll see you soon in Munhall, Pennsylvania, just outside of Pittsburgh. Cincinnati, Ohio, Portsmouth, New Hampshire, Medford, Massachusetts, just outside of Boston, and Ridgefield, Connecticut. Tickets to all the shows are on sale [e-mail] live.

[Megan]

It's just around the next corner, Eric. Okay, Megan, I'm starting to feel better already.

[Nimini]

Remind, where are we going again?

[Megan]

The Pence, Ohio Public Theater, Nimini.

[Nimini]

Oh, right. And why are we heading there again?

[Megan]

We happen to be in the area, and you and Eric expressed an interest in seeing where I first learned to hone my craft.

[Eric]

That's not quite how I remember it.

[Nimini]

Wasn't it more like you found a bad review of your most recent One woman show on the sixth search page

[Eric]

of your name and you couldn't stop talking about it for days. Then you said, the only thing that'll help me shake this feeling is to see the stellar review of my first ever One woman and show that the Pence, Ohio Public Theater has framed in their lobby.

[Megan]

That sounds a little familiar. And then you two enthusiastically raised your hands to drive me there in the tidal wave since I don't have a license?

[Eric]

Wasn't it more like we all drew

[Nimini]

straws and Eric and I got the short straws?

[Megan]

Which everyone knows means you won, right? That's why we dropped everyone else off at the Super Fun Science and Guitar Museum. But you two weren't specifically interested in that museum anyway. And here we are. Come on, let's go. Do you see it? That building right there is the prestigious LORT D regional theater, the Pensaho Public Theater.

[Nimini]

Megan, are you okay? Your knees buckled and you dropped to the ground.

[Megan]

Doth my eyes deceive me? That's the Pennsahayo Public Theater building. But instead of the old marquee out front, there's A huge sign that says, this is the the.

[Eric]

The The Pence, Ohio dmv.

[Megan]

Swoon and collapse.

[Narrator/Host]

I love Story Pirates.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

It just filled me up with joy.

[DMV Employee]

My mom loves the jokes.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Yo Yo Matcha. It made me very proud about my sighting. No, you know, like Hamburgers was the name. I definitely think I can be more creative now. I'm the champion.

[Narrator/Host]

The Story Pirates.

[Eric]

Welcome back to the Story Pirates podcast, everyone.

[Nimini]

Where we take stories written by kids and turn them into sketch comedy and songs of swoon. Since the theater's not here, let's go join everybody else at the super fun Guitar and Science Museum.

[Megan]

Yeah, I suppose you're right. But. Sigh. Swoon. Hand to head.

[Peter]

But what?

[Eric]

Megan?

[Megan]

I thought seeing a tangible accomplishment of mine would wipe out all the bad feelings from that review. But now I feel worse than ever.

[DMV Employee]

Excuse me. You look lost.

[Megan]

You have no idea. Kind DMV employee.

[DMV Employee]

Nah, we get a lot of lost looking people here at the dmv. Are you here to sign up for a driver's test? I got one slot left available at the end of the day. Oh, no.

[Eric]

I already have one.

[Narrator/Host]

Yes.

[Tyler]

Wha.

[DMV Employee]

Okay, I'll put you down on my list. See you in a few hours.

[Megan]

If I get my driver's license, that would be a tangible accomplishment. Something that would make me feel better. Would you two help me prepare?

[Eric]

I don't know about this, Megan.

[Nimini]

Eric, if we don't help her now, she's just going to stay fixated on the bad review. Plus, this way she can drive herself to her next wild side quest.

[Eric]

Great point, Nemene. Of course we'll help you, Megan. I'll pull out a study guide and we can get started.

[Nimini]

While you two do that, how about we hear our first story from a kid?

[Megan]

Sounds great.

[Eric]

And here to introduce it is the author.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Hi, my name's Emmett. I'm nine years old and I live in California. This is my story. The Kid that has a Bad Name.

[Megan]

Honey, come downstairs please. It's time for school.

[Nimini]

Coming.

[Megan]

That son of mine. What a wonderful kid. I'm so glad I named. Do you like hot dogs?

[Tyler]

Hey, Mom.

[Megan]

There's my little. Do you like hot dogs?

[Tyler]

Yeah, that's me. Hey, mom, bad news. I can't go to school today.

[Joe]

What?

[Narrator/Host]

Why not?

[Tyler]

Well, it's not because I'm embarrassed by my bad name. It's because I'm sick. Yeah, that's the ticket.

[Megan]

That's the fakest cough I've ever heard. Come on now. Do you like hot dogs?

[Tyler]

Of course I love hot dogs.

[Megan]

Oh, No, I wasn't asking if you like hot dogs. I was just saying your name. Right now, off to school or you'll be late. Oh, before you go, I wanted to ask what you feel like for dinner. Do you like hot dogs?

[Tyler]

Yes. What is it?

[Megan]

What's what?

[Tyler]

You said my name.

[Megan]

Oh, sorry. This time I was asking if you like hot dogs. Do you like hot dogs? Do you like hot dogs?

[Tyler]

That's it. I'm going to school.

[Megan]

Okay, bye.

[Tyler]

Here I am at school. Boy, I can't wait for people to say my bad name. Oh, hey, there's my friend Tyler. Hey, do you like hot dogs? Of course I love hot dogs. No, I'm just saying hi.

[Lee]

Oh, do you like hot dogs? Is your name right?

[Tyler]

Yes, Tyler. We do this every day. Hey, do you like hot dogs?

[Lee]

Do you like hot dogs?

[Tyler]

Oh, thank goodness. That's the bell. We'd better get to class. Alright, class, take your seats. Time for me to take attendance. Ugh, here it comes. Tyler.

[Eric]

Here.

[Tyler]

Sarah.

[Nimini]

Here.

[Tyler]

Do you like hot dogs?

[Nimini]

Yes.

[Lee]

What?

[Nimini]

I said yes because you asked me if I like hot dogs, which was weird, but whatever.

[Peter]

Oh, sorry.

[Tyler]

I wasn't asking if you like hot dogs. Oh, were you asking me if I like hot dogs? No, I was asking if do you like hot dogs? Is present.

[Nimini]

Ooh, I would love hot dogs as a present.

[Joe]

Me too.

[Tyler]

Me too. No. Ugh. I'm not asking, do you like hot dogs? I'm reading the name do you like hot dogs? Off my attendance list. Oh, right. I'm here. Thank you. Do you like hot dogs? But now that you mention it, do

[Lee]

you like hot dogs? Ugh.

[Tyler]

Well, I guess we'll never find out. Taking attendance was so confusing. It took the whole class period to finish. Just like it does every single day.

[Lee]

Well, hope you all have a good

[Tyler]

lunch time for lunch here in the cafeteria. I just hope we're not having. Oh, boy.

[Peter]

Hot dogs.

[Tyler]

Oh, no. I hope everything goes smoothly with the lunch lady.

[Joe]

All right, kids, you know the drill. You tell me your name and I

[Narrator/Host]

serve your lunch nice and easy. Who's first?

[Megan]

Me.

[Tyler]

I'm Tyler.

[Joe]

Here you go, Tyler. A fresh batch of hot dogs with all the fixings. Thanks.

[Narrator/Host]

Who's next?

[Tyler]

Me.

[Narrator/Host]

Name?

[Tyler]

Do you like hot dogs?

[Narrator/Host]

Of course I do.

[Joe]

Favorite meal of the month to cook.

[Narrator/Host]

Name?

[Tyler]

Do you like hot dogs?

[Joe]

I love hot dogs. Always glad when there's leftovers because I can take them home now.

[Narrator/Host]

Don't be holding up the line. Tell me your name.

[Tyler]

Do you like hot dogs?

[Narrator/Host]

Now don't you get smart.

[Joe]

With me, young man.

[Tyler]

But I'm trying to tell you that.

[Narrator/Host]

That's it.

[Joe]

No hot dogs for you. I'm calling the principal.

[Narrator/Host]

Principal.

[Peter]

Principal here. Did someone call for me?

[Joe]

Yes.

[Narrator/Host]

This kid is holding up the lunch

[Joe]

line on Hot Dog Day.

[Narrator/Host]

Of all days, the gall.

[Peter]

What's your name, young man?

[Tyler]

Do you like hot dogs?

[Eric]

Of course.

[Peter]

They're delicious. What's your name?

[Tyler]

Do you like hot dogs?

[Lee]

Yes.

[Peter]

With mustard, onion, celery, salt, the works. Tell me your name.

[Tyler]

Do you like hot dogs?

[Peter]

Yes, I do. What is your name?

[Tyler]

I can't do this anymore.

[Peter]

That's a weird name.

[Tyler]

No, no, no. He's saying he's going home, but school's not over. You'll get in so much trouble. Oh, he can't hear me because he already left.

[Peter]

Well, I hope he has fun at home. Mmm.

[Eric]

Hot dog.

[Tyler]

Hi, Mom. I'm home.

[Joe]

What?

[Megan]

But school's not over.

[Tyler]

It is for me. I'm going to my room and not coming out until I'm rid of this bad name.

[Narrator/Host]

Wait.

[Megan]

Do you like hot dogs?

[Tyler]

Of course I do. I love hot dogs.

[Megan]

That son of mine. I'd better go talk it out with him.

[Narrator/Host]

Ha.

[Megan]

He locked the door. Well, good thing I always have a key.

[Eric]

Mom.

[Megan]

Sorry, sweetie. I had to. Now what's wrong?

[Tyler]

I hate my name.

[Megan]

What?

[Narrator/Host]

Why do you hate your name?

[Tyler]

Because it doesn't make any sense. Someone says my name, and then I always say, of course because I love hot dogs. But they're actually just saying my name. And if I try to tell someone else my name, then they keep saying, yes, I like hot dogs. It's confusing.

[Megan]

But do you like hot dogs? Your name makes you special.

[Tyler]

It does?

[Narrator/Host]

How?

[Megan]

First of all, it's tradition. You come from a long line of people with special names. Your father is named. How's it going? Mine is, yes, thank you. Your grandfather, who's on first.

[Tyler]

Oh, yeah.

[Megan]

And second, your name is special because it's unique. Think about it. Have you ever met anyone with the same name as you?

[Tyler]

No.

[Megan]

See? Your name is special because you're special. Huh.

[Tyler]

I guess I never thought of it that way.

[Megan]

Well, what are moms for if not to offer the wisdom of our age? Now, please go back to school.

[Tyler]

Okay.

[Megan]

Mom, did you remember your backpack?

[Tyler]

Yes, thank you.

[Megan]

Do you like hot dogs? Since when did you start referring to me by my first name?

[Tyler]

Mom? I meant, yes, thank you, as in, yes, I have my backpack. Thank you.

[Megan]

Oh, because you said. But that's actually okay. All right, we have fun. Have a great time at school.

[Tyler]

Here I am, back at school. Hey, Tyler.

[Eric]

Hey.

[Tyler]

You're back. Yeah, I got mad because of my name. But then I realized my name makes me special. There's nobody else in the whole world who has it. And there are a lot of good things that go with that. Like, I'll never get my drink mixed up at a coffee shop. Sure, it'll be expensive getting my name embroidered on stuff, but that's a price I'm willing to pay to be a kid with a good name. It's the principal.

[Peter]

Hello, Tyler. Hello. Do you like hot dogs? That was a right pretty speech. Do you like hot dogs? In fact, you've inspired me to embrace my own bad name.

[Tyler]

Oh, your name couldn't be as bad

[Lee]

as do you like hot dogs?

[Peter]

No, it's worse.

[Tyler]

Well, what is it?

[Peter]

My name is Principal Butt Face.

[Tyler]

Principal Butt Face.

[DMV Employee]

I told you the end.

[Megan]

And now Lee speaks with the author.

[Lee]

Emmett, I am so excited about your story. The Kid that has a bad name. How did you come up with the idea for that story?

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Well, me and my mom when I was a kid used to say stories and some stories had, like, people with funny names.

[Lee]

Can you think of any of the other funny names that you guys have used in stories in the past?

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

One was, do you like hamburgers?

[Lee]

Yeah, I do. But what were the names in the stories?

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Do you like hamburgers?

[Lee]

Yeah, I do like hamburgers. But what was the name?

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

That was the name that.

[Lee]

Oh, the name is that.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Yeah.

[Lee]

T H A T. No.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Do you like hamburgers? Was the name.

[Lee]

Yes, I do. I do like hamburgers. I'm sorry. I just had to do it. I had to do it. Emmett, are there any other funny names that you and your mom have had in your stories?

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

I forgot.

[Lee]

Oh, I forgot the name.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

No, actually I forgot the name.

[Lee]

Oh, the name is. Actually, I forgot the name.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

No, actually, I actually forgot the name.

[Lee]

Oh, sorry. Actually, no, actually I forgot the name. That's the name. It is pretty funny, I have to. I have to admit. So let's talk about the principal's name in your story. Do you like hot dogs? Learns to appreciate their name a little bit because their mom explains that it's a special name for a special kid. Do you think that Principal Butt Face appreciates his name?

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

I think he thinks, like, the name causes too much trouble. Like he. Like every time someone says his name, he says, yes, I do. After everyone says his name.

[Lee]

Mothers, fathers of the world, please don't name your children. Buff face, please. Do you agree with that? Yeah, let's Think of other funny names for characters. Ooh, I've got one.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

What?

[Lee]

I just told you. Ooh, I've got one.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

That's the name?

[Lee]

Yeah, that's the name. Emmett, thank you so much for bringing this hilarious idea into my life and for letting us perform your story.

[Megan]

Thank you.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

You're welcome.

[Lee]

Bye.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Bye.

[Eric]

Wow, what an amazing story.

[Megan]

I agree. So imaginative.

[Nimini]

Almost as imaginative as some of the answers you're giving to these basic driving questions.

[Megan]

Megan, can you blame me? The only driving I've ever done is on film sets. And you know, that's just when you sit in front of a screen of a moving landscape and concentrate on jostling around in a way that matches the scenery. It's not as easy as it looks.

[Eric]

Okay, last question here, and then we should have you take a few practice laps before your actual test. We've only got a few minutes before the DMV employee comes back to start the actual test.

[Megan]

I'm ready for the last question.

[Eric]

Okay. When passing a slower car on the freeway, which lane should you use?

[Megan]

The right lane, because as the faster car, I have the right of way.

[Nimini]

No, Megan, the left lane.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Hmm.

[Megan]

Okay, use the left lane because they're about to say, she left us behind.

[Eric]

Right?

[Megan]

I think you mean left. Oh, come on, you two. Taking this paper road test is all about memorization, which I, as an actress, am an expert at. I may have guessed all the wrong answers when you quizzed me, but you told me the correct answers, and I already memorized them.

[Nimini]

If you say so. Let's see how you do behind the wheel of the tidal wave. Here are the keys.

[Megan]

Oh, these are no fun. It's just a plain old ring of keys. Where's the little photo frame? Or the lucky rabbit's foot? Or the carabiner?

[Eric]

You mean carabiner.

[Megan]

It doesn't have one of those either.

[Nimini]

Megan, focus. Now, unlock the ship and get into the driver's seat. That locks it.

[Eric]

That's the trunk

[Nimini]

and that's the alarm.

[Megan]

There, we're in. Ooh, this is so exciting.

[Narrator/Host]

Vroom, vroom.

[Megan]

And all that.

[Narrator/Host]

Engine on.

[Eric]

Now, the first thing you want to do is.

[Megan]

You don't have to tell me. Adjust the seat and side mirrors.

[Nimini]

Very good, Megan.

[Megan]

So this lever must move the seat. I'll just put it in D for driver's seat.

[Nimini]

Seat.

[Eric]

No, Megan, that's the gear shift.

[Narrator/Host]

Gear shift.

[Megan]

We're moving.

[Narrator/Host]

What should I do? Hit the brake.

[Nimini]

Got it. That's the gas. Hit the brake.

[Narrator/Host]

Is this the brake?

[Megan]

This lever says brake on it. I didn't realize the brake is up by your hands.

[Eric]

That was the parking brake. I'm not sure how this happened, but you spun us in a perfect circle. Just like they do in the swift and irritated movies. Some stunt people train for years to do that. I'd be impressed if I wasn't so terrified.

[Megan]

Not the first time I've heard that.

[Nimini]

Maybe we should start with something easier,

[Megan]

like parallel parking, three point turns, Tokyo Drift.

[Nimini]

Maybe just try turning on the headlights.

[Megan]

Okay.

[Peter]

Oh, dear.

[DMV Employee]

Okay, last driver's test of the day. You ready?

[Megan]

No. Absolutely.

[DMV Employee]

I'll take that as a yes. Since you're already in your honestly huge vehicle that for some reason also looks like a ship. We'll start with the road test portion of the exam. But you two can't all be in the car. We're only allowed to drive with the person taking the test.

[Nimini]

Good luck, Megan.

[Megan]

Eric, before you leave, give me a character to play.

[Eric]

What?

[Megan]

You said one of your all time favorite movie franchises. Swift and irritated is all about awesome drivers. Just give me a character to play that might be in a future movie to get me through this test.

[Eric]

Okay. Your name is Nancy and you're an undercover government agent sent to join the crew. Only you're a double agent sending information back to the bad guys.

[Megan]

Sounds overly complicated for a car movie.

[Eric]

It is. And your catchphrase is I don't play or pay fare.

[Megan]

Got it. Thank you.

[DMV Employee]

Excuse me, can we start please? You two, out of the car.

[Eric]

Okay, sure.

[DMV Employee]

Okay, now that I'm safely inside, Megan, please roll your window up and let's pull out onto that busy road there.

[Megan]

Righty O, Governor. I just hope it's not a toll road. Cause I don't play or pay fare.

[DMV Employee]

There's one in every test group.

[Nimini]

There she goes.

[Narrator/Host]

Wow.

[Nimini]

She pulled into traffic so smoothly, she

[Eric]

signaled like a pro.

[Nimini]

Now she's switching lanes so smooth and

[Eric]

perfectly executing a U turn to come back to the parking lot where she's

[Nimini]

doing a three point turn, head and

[Eric]

parking into a tight spot and parallel parking and Tokyo. Drifting like a pro.

[Narrator/Host]

Whoa.

[Nimini]

I've never seen that done from a parked position.

[Eric]

Now she's getting out and giving us the thumbs up. The DMV worker is giving her a paper test on a clipboard. Wow, she's really buzzing through it.

[Nimini]

She's already handing it back to them and they're grading it.

[Eric]

Uh, why are we all the way over here? Let's go over and hear the test results.

[DMV Employee]

Correct, correct and correct.

[Megan]

Does this mean.

[DMV Employee]

It is my privilege to inform you that you have passed the driver's test and now will have a driver's license issued by Pence, Ohio County.

[Narrator/Host]

Hooray.

[DMV Employee]

I just need you to fill out your personal information here and you'll have your license in a gif.

[Megan]

Thank you both so much for helping me. I couldn't have done any of this without you. To think I started the day off so upset about a bad review and ended it having achieved something real, something I'll be able to carry around with me and say, look, I did that. There you go.

[Narrator/Host]

Thank you.

[Nimini]

Congratulations, Megan. You worked as hard as you probably could have in one afternoon, and I'm

[Eric]

glad my character suggestion helped. Would you want to watch one of the movies sometime? There are 37 of them.

[Megan]

Sure. Maybe the plots will make sense to me now that I'm a licensed driver.

[DMV Employee]

Only you're not a licensed driver. And to show you how serious I am, I'm tearing up your application.

[Megan]

My accomplishment swoon, clutch my heart and fall to the ground.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

We'll be right back after a few words from the grownups.

[Lee]

Hey grown ups. Today's episode is sponsored by Quince. This time of year always makes me rethink what's in my closet. I'm trying to keep fewer things, but better ones. Pieces that are well made and easier, easy to wear all the time. And that's why I keep coming back to Quince. The fabrics feel elevated, the fits are thoughtful, and the pricing actually makes sense. Quince makes high quality everyday essentials using premium materials like 100% European linen and their insanely soft flow knit activewear fabric. Their men's linen pants and shirts are lightweight, breathable and comfortable. Basically the perfect layer for spring. The pants strike the right balance between laid back and refined, so you look put together without trying too hard. And they're flowknit activewear, moisture wicking, anti odor and soft enough that you'll actually want to wear it all day. The best part is that their prices are 50 to 60% less than similar brands. How Quints works directly with ethical factories and cuts out the middlemen. So you are paying for quality, not brand markup. Everything is designed to last and makes getting dressed easy. I have this blue cashmere sweater from Quince and I just love it. It's honestly probably the nicest looking thing that I own. I normally wouldn't even wear something that looks that nice because I eat a lot of sauces. But then I remember how affordable Quince is, so why not live a little? It's also so soft and cozy. So when I wear it, I'm like a fuzzy little unicorn and everyone wants to hug me. At first I was like, wow, people must like me. But then I realized, oh, it's a sweater. Refresh your wardrobe with quince. Go to quints.com storypirates for free shipping and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada too. Go to Q-U-I-N-C-E.com storypirates for free Shipping and 365 day returns. Quints.com storypirates hey, grown ups. Lee here. See Story Pirates live. Our amazing touring cast, including Eric, will be visiting some east coast cities this spring to perform some of your favorite songs from the podcast. And they'll take suggestions from kids in the audience to create a brand new story that will only be seen once. Best of all, all of our upcoming shows are on weekends, so no need to worry about school nights or bedtime routines. We'll see you soon in Munhall, Pennsylvania, just outside of Pittsburgh. Cincinnati, Ohio, Portsmouth, New Hampshire, Medford, Massachusetts, just outside of Boston and Ridgefield, Connecticut. Tickets to all the shows are on sale [e-mail] live.

[Eric]

Megan, wake up. We're back from the break.

[DMV Employee]

Here, let me help. I was a tad over dramatic back when I ripped up your application and now I feel bad.

[Megan]

Thank you.

[Nimini]

But why can't she get a license? She passed the driving and written test portion of the driver's test with flying colors.

[DMV Employee]

That's true. Only I saw your address on this line here.

[Megan]

So?

[DMV Employee]

So you're not a local resident. You must have a local address to qualify for residency and a state license.

[Nimini]

Oh, maybe should have checked that earlier first.

[Megan]

I lost the Pence, Ohio Public Theater. The most well respected, well regarded, well reviewed regional LORT D theater in the world. And now this.

[DMV Employee]

Wait a minute. You know about the Pensahayo Public Theater?

[Megan]

Know about it? I was an apprentice here. I started my career here and even created my first one woman show entitled Looking at the Rain. You know it?

[DMV Employee]

Know it. I only saw it like 30 times. I love the theater and I especially loved your production. That moment where you caught that daisy with your teeth to show how much you missed your mother.

[Eric]

And she thinks swift and irritated plots are hard to follow.

[DMV Employee]

I think about that all the time. The whole reason I work at the DMV is because of the theater.

[Megan]

Because you like being in the space and wanted to preserve that magical feeling.

[DMV Employee]

Yeah, something like that. I mean, I showed up to buy season tickets, but the theater had been replaced by the dmv. And they were hiring, so I applied. But your reason sounds good too.

[Narrator/Host]

Wow.

[DMV Employee]

I never thought I'd be able to meet the Megan.

[Megan]

Ah, shucks.

[DMV Employee]

And I never dreamed I'd turn her down for a license. Wait, that came out wrong. I'm just very moved.

[Megan]

Not as moved as I. Thank you for everything.

[Peter]

Thank you.

[DMV Employee]

I didn't help with anything.

[Megan]

No, you've taught me that the impression that one's artistry leaves is real. Even if the review in the lobby has been replaced by signs pointing you

[Eric]

to vision tests, brochures about driver safety,

[Nimini]

and lines upon lines upon lines of stressed out people.

[DMV Employee]

Speaking of which, I should get back in there and close up for the night. So nice to meet you all. And sorry I couldn't give you a license. I can, however, give you these stickers

[Peter]

that look like different street signs.

[Nimini]

Here, I got yield, I got railroad crossing.

[Megan]

And I left turn only.

[Eric]

Megan, are you crying?

[Megan]

Yes. But don't worry. These tears aren't from my bad review, but from my great memories.

[DMV Employee]

Okay, that's about it for me then. Bye now.

[Eric]

Time to head back and catch up with the rest of the story. Pirates.

[Nimini]

I doubt any of them had as exciting a day as we did. Now who's driving? No, seriously, me or Eric? I don't care either way. We should just figure that out.

[Eric]

Oh, right. Yeah, I'll drive. Megan, will you hand me the keys?

[Megan]

Oh, sure. Okay. I had them right here in my pocket, didn't I?

[Nimini]

Uh, oh.

[Megan]

Oh, no. There they are. I left them in the ignition. Let's try the doors. Maybe they're unlocked. Oh, dear. I locked the keys in the ship. I'm sorry.

[Eric]

It's okay. We have Rolo side assistance. That guy never goes anywhere without, like, five sets of backup keys.

[Nimini]

I'll give him a call while we're waiting for backup. Should we do another story?

[Lee]

Yeah.

[Narrator/Host]

Great.

[Nimini]

And here to introduce. Introduce it is the author.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Hello, my name is Autumn and I'm a 6 year old and I live in Massachusetts. This is my story. Cats News.

[Joe]

This is Cats News, your trusted news source that's reported by Cats for cats and kittens. Here now is our lead anchor team and actual cats. Joe and Mia, this is Cats News.

[Narrator/Host]

Hello and welcome to Cats News, your one and only trusted news source reported by Cats for cats and kittens.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Meow.

[Narrator/Host]

I'm Mia.

[Joe]

And I'm Joe.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Meow.

[Joe]

First things first. It may look like I'm wearing a tutu, but I'm not wearing a tutu. Okay, now for a cat's News. Fast Cat News hit. We go live to Disco. Disco.

[Narrator/Host]

Thanks, Jill. Thanks, Mia. This just in. A cat is sweating, swimming in a pool. And she does not like it. I don't like it. Back to you in the studio, Joe.

[Joe]

Thanks, Disco. Stellar reporting.

[Narrator/Host]

We now go live to the field with Cats News correspondent Butterscotch reporting on a developing story. Butterscotch. Thanks, Mia. I'm here at a local residence where we've had multiple reports from Cats claiming they saw a little green dot appear on the floor, wriggle around and then vanish. Here is one of the witnesses.

[Joe]

My name is Wolfgang. I was lazing in a sun patch, just minding my own business. When all of a sudden a bright green dot appeared out of nowhere. Right on the floor in front of me.

[Narrator/Host]

What happened next?

[Joe]

I did what I believe any cat would do. I chased. Finally came to a stop. So I pounced right on top of it. I knew I caught it, but when I opened my paws, it was gone.

[Narrator/Host]

And Wolfgang here isn't the only one with a story like this.

[Joe]

I'm a great Pouncer. Where did it go, Butterscotch? Where did it go?

[Narrator/Host]

We'll keep looking, Wolfgang. Until then, I'm Butterscotch with Cats News.

[Joe]

Thanks, Butterscotch. Now, for our next.

[Narrator/Host]

Hey, Joe. Sorry to interrupt, but are you wearing a tutu?

[Joe]

Thanks for asking. I am not. And now over to Trip with Sports.

[Narrator/Host]

Thanks, Joe. In sports news, the Pouncers and the Itty Bitty Kitties tied for the championship. After both both teams got bored and laid down on the field. And parkour star Luna is being questioned about her catnip use in the last Cat Olympics. That's all for Trip with Sports.

[Joe]

Back to you, Joe. Thanks, Trip. Go, Pouncers. Moving on to tonight's lead story. We'll switch from playing on the field to being in an open field.

[Narrator/Host]

What happens when an alley cat decides she's outgrown the alley? We traveled beyond the city limits to find out. One day, Priscilla Princess woke up and decided it was time for a change. I was having a catnap in the sunny spot on top of my favorite trash can. When a car alarm woke me up. And something inside just said. How many of those nine lives will you spend in this alley? Time to get out of town. Priscilla, always a clever cat, found her way to the country where she founded Kitten Acres six months ago. If you would have told me I would be living on a farm, I would have said rat. But I love it here. Where she used to nap on trash cans. She now naps on hay bales. And where she used to chase rats, she now chases rats. Turns out there are a lot of rats on farms. But, hey, don't be a scaredy cat. Come out and visit us at Kitten acres off Highway 12.

[Joe]

Thanks for that great reporting, Mia. We now take you to Meow to your ologist. Muffins. Thanks, Joe. Great tutu. It isn't a. Speaking of tutus, it's not going to get too, too hot out there across the cat land. This week we're looking at some gorgeous sunny days for indoor and outdoor cats alike. Now, let's take a look at my handy dandy weather map system.

[Narrator/Host]

Are you sure about that, Muffins? Last time you saw the graphics on the screen, you tried to chase them.

[Joe]

No, no, not this time. Now, as you can see, the cold front will be moving from up here to down here by this little smiling cloud who seems to be taunting me and tempting me. And I'm gonna get him.

[Narrator/Host]

I'm gonna get him.

[Joe]

And he's chasing the graphics on the animated weather map again. I'm gonna get you, you little cloud.

[Narrator/Host]

Get back here. Sorry to interrupt, but I'm getting word that we have an update from our story from earlier. We take you back to Butterscotch in the field. Thanks, Mia. I'm here on the city streets reporting that the little green dot is back. We had just left the last interview with Wolfgang here.

[Megan]

Hello.

[Narrator/Host]

When the little green dot appeared again, we had no choice but to start chasing it. Wait, it stopped.

[Joe]

Quiet now.

[Narrator/Host]

I got it.

[Joe]

It's right under my paw. Here.

[Narrator/Host]

Behold. There's nothing there. No, I saw it with my own eyes. As clearly as I see Joe's tutu.

[Joe]

It's not a butterscotch.

[Narrator/Host]

Wolfgang, on the wall behind you. It looks like it's headed straight for the cat's new station. Keep your eyes peeled, Mia and Joe, Live with Cats news. This is Butterscotch. Thank you, Butterscotch. Stay safe out there. And now we go to.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Meow.

[Narrator/Host]

Joe, was that you?

[Joe]

Uh, no.

[Narrator/Host]

Well, it wasn't me. Wait a minute. Joe, who sat by your feet?

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Meow.

[Joe]

Nothing. We now go to.

[Narrator/Host]

I see that you brought your pet cat to work.

[Joe]

No, I didn't.

[Narrator/Host]

I'm leaving.

[Joe]

Huh.

[Narrator/Host]

Well, that was strange. Joe is clearly going through something today. I hope he comes back. Hi, Joe's pet cat. Meow.

[Joe]

Mia, I'm back.

[Narrator/Host]

Joe, are you all right?

[Joe]

Yes, it's been an emotional day. I don't know if you noticed, but I'm wearing a tutu.

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah, we all Noticed.

[Joe]

I think it's time to tell you the story behind the tutu. You see, uh.

[Nimini]

Oh.

[Narrator/Host]

I think your pet cat likes me better, Joe.

[Peter]

Wha.

[Joe]

Breaking news. My kitten likes Mia better.

[Narrator/Host]

The green dot.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

There it goes.

[Narrator/Host]

Breaking news here live at the couch new studios. Followed by a herd of cows. Who is that Greek dog? That is it. Where did it come from? Where did it come from?

[Lee]

Wow, Hannah, you have so many cats. It's almost like they have their own little world down there.

[Narrator/Host]

Look at all the cats trying to catch the green dot from my laser pointer. Come on, disco. Come on, Muppets, try and get it.

[Lee]

Hey, where's Joe? I want to finish putting this ballerina costume on him.

[Joe]

Well, Mia, that doesn't for us on Cat News.

[Lee]

There you are, Joe. Gotcha.

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, no.

[Joe]

They're picking me up again.

[Lee]

You look so pretty in your ballerina tutu.

[Joe]

I know I do.

[Narrator/Host]

That's all from us here at Cats News Studios. Good night and good lick.

[Joe]

The end.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Meow.

[Nimini]

And now, Lee speaks with the author.

[Lee]

Autumn, I love your story, Cats News.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Thank you.

[Lee]

How did you come up with the idea for your story?

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

We have a cat, and she does lots of silly things.

[Lee]

What's your cat's name?

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Her nickname is basically just Fanny. She's, like, so funny, and she's so cute. I just love her.

[Lee]

Aw. If you were a reporter for Cats News Station, reporting about your cat, what would you talk about? Like, what are the silly things that your cat does?

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

I would report that once my cat was hiding in a box, and my mom walked by and one of the boxes meowed, and my mom said, hi, Fanny, because she was in one of the boxes.

[Lee]

Do you ever try to speak to her in cat language?

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Oh, sometimes I just meow and see if she comes to me, but she never does. But sometimes I do it near her, and she just walks a little closer, and then I get to pick her up and pet her.

[Lee]

Is she in the room right now?

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Definitely not.

[Lee]

Try to meow, and with your meow, try to speak cat language and say, there's food in here. That was good. Is she coming?

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Definitely not.

[Peter]

Oh.

[Lee]

Well, in your story, the reporters for Cats News, are they actually also cats?

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Yes, they are.

[Lee]

And yet they have pet cats, too? Because Joe has a pet cat.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Well, Joe does. And yes.

[Lee]

Is that something that happens in the real world? Do cats ever have pet cats?

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

I don't know, but I wish my cat did.

[Lee]

Joe's pet cat likes Mia better. Can you tell me why?

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Because Joe mostly just cares more about his work. And Mia cares more about the nature around her. So the cat likes her better because she likes the cat better.

[Lee]

And can you tell me more about why Joe was wearing the tutu?

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Well, because he's a ballerina and that's his secret and he wasn't supposed to be wearing it to his office.

[Lee]

Autumn, you're amazing. Thank you for chatting with me today and thanks for letting us perform your story.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

You're welcome. I also want to give a shout out to DJ Squirm a lot. I really like your song DJ Squirm a lot.

[Lee]

Oh my gosh, that's nice. I'll tell him you said that.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Thanks.

[Lee]

Bye.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Bye. We'll be right back after a few words for the grown up.

[Lee]

Hey there. I'm Lee from Story Pirates.

[Peter]

And I am Peter from Story Pirates.

[Lee]

And welcome to Story Love. The Story Pirates get tens of thousands of stories written by kids every year from all around the world. And Story Pirates reads in response to every single one. Some of them we get to put on our podcast. Yep. And some of them we read and talk about on this segment. Story Love.

[Narrator/Host]

Story Love.

[Peter]

Story Love.

[Lee]

So let's get busy.

[Peter]

Yes, Lee.

[Lee]

All right, Peter, would you like to read the first story today?

[Peter]

I would love to. Here I go. Lee. This first story comes to us from a 10 year old from the UK named Madeline. And Madeline's story is called this Mirror is Definitely Not a Mirror.

[DMV Employee]

Oh no.

[Peter]

I am Timmy Johnny elfie Robert the 39,565th. And I am also a scuba diving evil wizard professor. I can see a mirror in a back room in my lair. I touch it and when I look into the mirror, my finger does not touch its reflection. That's weird. The mirror turns into ice cream and melts before I can lick. Reveals a bright pink door. There is a sign on the door saying come in here, all you scuba diving professors don't go in there. I go in and I start falling down, down.

[Narrator/Host]

Ah.

[Lee]

The end. What happened to the main character?

[Peter]

Cliff? I was gonna say cliffhanger, but that's a cliff faller.

[Lee]

I go down and I start. I go in and I start falling down, down, down.

[Child Author (Emmett/Autumn)]

Ah.

[Lee]

Hehehe.

[Peter]

He is Embra. At first very scared that he's falling and then fully embraces the unknown of the situation.

[Lee]

Here's what I think. I think that this wizard, this scuba diving evil wizard professor has been captured by a rival wizard. You know, rival wizards are always trying to capture each other.

[Peter]

Yes.

[Lee]

And I think that he's fallen for like a very intricate trap. And so he's falling. He's been defeated, he's screaming. But he also can't help but admire the ingenuity of his rival.

[Peter]

I love this interpretation. Although it does say, I see a mirror in a back room in my lair.

[Lee]

Well, yeah, that's the best place to lay a trap.

[Peter]

Oh, so you're saying the mirror itself that he's fallen into is the trap?

[Lee]

Yes.

[Peter]

Ah. Okay, that makes more sense.

[Lee]

The rival wizard snuck into his house, put up this mirror trap.

[Peter]

Mm. You know what this reminded me of? When I was growing up, my little brother had a very serious theory about mirrors. And one day we were sitting there, and he said, hey, Peter. I go, yeah. And he goes, do you know why we can't get into Mirror World? I said, why? He goes, because of mirror Boy. I said, what do you mean? The boy in the mirror that looks just like me? Every time I try to move and touch, he does the same thing. And I touch his hand, and he's touching my hand with just the equal amount of force that I am touching. So anytime you try to get through, he blocks you because he's doing the same. And you try to be quicker, but you can't be quicker than Mirror Boy.

[Lee]

Wow.

[Peter]

And that really stuck with me.

[Lee]

Wow.

[Peter]

Wow.

[Lee]

I love.

[Peter]

There's. There's. We've had a lot of stories recently and over the years where kids love to give characters very long names and make them, like, the 19th or the 40th. But I love the kid that goes all out. And Madeline says, timmy, Johnny, alfie, Robert. The 39,564 fifth.

[Lee]

Well, and to their credit, to Meline's credit, she wrote out the words instead of making us figure that out with the numbers, which you famously are very bad at doing.

[Peter]

Well, I rush it. You really should slow down. This made it easier for me.

[Lee]

Yeah. I love the imagery of the mirror melting in this.

[Eric]

Yeah.

[Lee]

It's like he touches the mirror, but it doesn't touch its reflection. Does it go through it?

[Peter]

I think because it's suddenly ice cream. So you're like, is this.

[Lee]

And then it turns on ice cream. Like ice cream, and then melts and reveals a pink door.

[Peter]

First he goes like, oh, ice cream. I'm gonna lick it. Oh, it's gone.

[Lee]

Before he can lick it, it's melted. And there's a pink door with a sign welcoming, scuba diving professors.

[Peter]

Come in here, all you scuba diving professors.

[Lee]

Not a good. Not a good read on what's safe and what's not. I love going to go through that door.

[Peter]

Yeah. I love, after the story, knowing what happens in the story, going back to the title, which is this mirror is definitely not a mirror. Spoiler alert.

[Lee]

Madeline, fantastic story. Thank you so much for sending it in to us.

[Peter]

Lee, do you want to read the next story?

[Lee]

I'd love to. Jackson and His Dancing Pants by Cameron, age 6, in North Carolina. Jackson has dancing pants. He likes his dancing pants very much. One time, his dancing pants were on fire because a dragon blew him with fire. But a random lady dumped a bucket of water on his head. Then the building turned into a crocodile and he had to fight him. He got out a sword and killed the crocodile. And he was on the newspaper. He has a pet mouse named Joey. The end.

[Peter]

Jackson lives in a world with lots of dangers. Yeah, he's jumping for one. He's just got his dancing pants on. Cause he's like, finally, I'm gonna have a relaxing day where I can just do my dancing. And then out of nowhere, he's on fire. Cause of a dragon. And then luckily, that lady helped him out. And then he's gotta fight a crocodile. And then now he's in the newspaper. He just wants to be left alone to dance.

[Lee]

I don't think this is our world. So I'm curious about this world. And you know, Cameron, if you're gonna maybe continue working on this story, which, you know, revision is always a good idea, I would say tell us about this world where this person lives, where this creature lives. What exactly is this creature? How does he fit into this world? Is this a normal creature? Is it an atypical creature? What can you tell us?

[Peter]

I was also wondering just now, do you think, because this is such a fun, fantastical world, are these the pants he wears to dance or do these pants dance themselves? Oh, that's how I want to go to a dance party. Yeah, I'll just let my clothes dance for me so I can just like, relax and have a soda.

[Lee]

This is amazing. Cameron, great work. We crave more. Thank you, my friend.

[Joe]

Mm.

[Lee]

All right, Peter, you want to read us our final?

[Peter]

Yes. This final story comes to us from a 6 year old from Oregon named Cohen. And Cohen's story is called the Spider who Got Lost. Once upon a time, there was a spider. The spider caught a fly and had his friends over for dinner, and they had a really nice time. Then the spider who hosted the party went away and caught some more flies, but didn't remember the way back to his house. So he found one of his friends who lived in the same area. And he asked the other spider if he knew the way home, but he didn't. So they just tried and tried and tried and tried to figure out the way home. They didn't find the way home until late in the night when they saw the light outside shining. And then they had another even bigger party and they lived happily ever after. Just kidding. That's not the end.

[Lee]

Oh, my gosh.

[Peter]

And then the spider who hosted the party went back to sleep. And then when he was sleeping, he woke up because he saw something shining in the light outside that looked like gold. And it was. And then he went outside and picked it up. So he brought it inside and put it on his bedside table. And then he read a book to his gold. And they lived happily ever after. I was kidding again.

[Lee]

Oh.

[Peter]

So he fell asleep reading a book to his pet Gold. The end. I am not kidding now.

[DMV Employee]

Wow.

[Lee]

I love the Mr. X with the kidding. Not kidding. Great work, Cohen.

[Peter]

I love that. This spider. I want to know what happened to this. The spider's dinner guests during that whole journey.

[Lee]

Well, I'm sure they all got home, right?

[Peter]

Well, he left them at his house to go find more flies for them.

[Lee]

Oh, well, they. They were probably there for a while. And it's like, I don't think he's coming back. Let's just go home.

[Peter]

What if they're still there? And he came home and the goal, he's reading stories to his gold and they're still in his kitchen being like, is that guy coming back? This spider did an Irish goodbye to his own party to get more food.

[Lee]

He's like, ah, I gotta go get ice at the bodega. Yeah.

[Peter]

And by that I mean gold.

[Lee]

More flies and gold.

[Peter]

The end.

[Lee]

Just kidding, Cohen. Fantastic story, my friend. To read all of these stories and see the pictures and enjoy them, you can head to storypirates.com and guess what, grown ups? You can find an even longer version of today's story love on YouTube. And while you're there, subscribe to our channel and make sure to watch new videos every week. And grown up storylove isn't just the name of a segment on our show. It's also the name of our incredible corporate volunteer program. To find out more about StoryLove, our digital creative writing program, StoryQuest, or our nonprofit arms story pirates Changemakers. Check out the show notes for links. That's it for today's episode. Thanks to today's authors, Emmett and Autumn. And guess what? You can still send us your stories. And we respond to every single one. We'll be back next week with another brand new episode. Until then, stay creative and stay kind.

[Narrator/Host]

By rain.

[Lee]

The Story Pirates podcast is a production of Story Pirates Studios, executive produced by Lee Overtree and Benjamin Salka. Co executive producers are Holly and Rizwan Kassim, Manya, Lissi, Murray Sampson, Jack Schaefer and Jacob Vaughn. This episode was produced by Isabel Erricchio, Sam Baer, Peter McNerney, Lee Overtree and Brittany Stahl. Recording sound design and mixing by Sam Baer at the Relic Room in New York City. Additional production by Brett Toobin. Theme song by Bobby Lord. Musical scoring by Eric Erson and Jack Mitchell. Our head writer is Peter McNerney. Staff writers are Megan O' Neill and Alexis Simpson. Contributing writing by Lee Overtree. Episode artwork by Camilla Frank. This episode features performances by eric austin, max bank, greg barnett, michelle chan, bennett langston darby, jake fallon, justin coon, caroline lux, anna marr, peter mcnerney, kyle moore, kento morita, megan o', neill, julia schroeder, brittany stahl, and nimini warehouse. Hi, yes, this is lee from the story pirates. I'm calling for principal butt face. Principal butt face? Yeah. B u t t f a c e butt face. Yes, principal butt face. Uh huh. Is principal butt face there? Okay, I'm pretty sure you do have a principal buttface. No. Principal butt face. Mr. Butt face? No. All right, thanks anyway. Bye.