The Ultimate Black Friday Survival Guide: how to shop sales without buyers remorse.

Summary

Sustain This! Podcast Episode Summary

Title: The Ultimate Black Friday Survival Guide: How to Shop Sales Without Buyers Remorse
Release Date: November 26, 2024
Hosts: Alyssa Beltempo, Christina Mychas, & Signe Hansen

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Introduction

In this insightful episode of Sustain This!, hosts Alyssa Beltempo, Christina Mychas, and Signe Hansen delve into the frenzy of Black Friday sales, offering listeners a comprehensive guide to navigating the shopping chaos without falling into the trap of buyer’s remorse. Released just in time for the holiday shopping season, the trio shares their collective wisdom on mindful consumption, personal style, and building a more intentional life and wardrobe.

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1. The Importance of Planning Ahead

Christina emphasizes the value of having a clear shopping list:

"I think probably the best way to take advantage of a sale is by having something in mind ahead of time. [...] don't spend time get the thing you want and then get out."
— Christina Mychas [01:33]

The hosts agree that entering Black Friday sales without a specific plan can lead to impulsive purchases and unnecessary spending. By preparing a wish list in advance, shoppers can focus on acquiring items they genuinely need or have been intending to buy, thereby maximizing the benefits of discounts without overshooting their budgets.

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2. Strategic Timing: Beyond Black Friday

Signe shares insights on alternative shopping periods:

"Sometimes it can make sense to buy like winter shoes in the springtime because that's when they're on sale."
— Signe Hansen [04:04]

The discussion highlights that significant discounts are not confined to Black Friday. January sales, off-season purchases, and post-holiday discounts often present better deals for certain items. By being flexible with shopping timelines, consumers can find excellent bargains without the intense rush and pressure of Black Friday.

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3. Supporting Small Businesses During Sales

Christina brings attention to the impact on small businesses:

"When a small business offers a Black Friday discount, they’re making a monetary sacrifice. They don’t have the volume to offset that loss like big brands do."
— Christina Mychas [11:03]

The hosts encourage listeners to consider directing their spending towards independent boutiques and small businesses. Supporting these enterprises during Black Friday can significantly impact their sustainability, especially since they often cannot afford deep discounts like larger corporations.

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4. Mindset Matters: Avoiding the Frenzy

Alyssa discusses personal resistance to sales frenzy:

"There was something about creating this sense of urgency that didn't exist in the first place to make a purchase that just doesn't sit well with me."
— Alyssa Beltempo [07:05]

The episode explores how the aggressive marketing tactics of Black Friday can create unnecessary stress and competition among shoppers. Alyssa and Christina share their discomfort with the high-energy atmosphere, advocating for a more calm and deliberate approach to purchasing.

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5. Practical Tips to Prevent Buyer’s Remorse

Alyssa outlines essential strategies:

1. Create a List and Stick to It:

   “Having a plan and a list is always the best thing to do.”
   — Alyssa Beltempo [03:07]

2. Ask Critical Questions Before Buying:

   "What do I already have that could satisfy this need or want that I have?"
   — Alyssa Beltempo [24:04]

   "Would I be buying this if it wasn't on sale?"
   — Alyssa Beltempo [24:04]

3. Assess Long-Term Value:

   "What will this look like after I've worn it? After it's worn in?"
   — Christina Mychas [26:31]

4. Consider Maintenance and Space:

   "Does it require maintenance? Are you willing to do the maintenance?"
   — Signe Hansen [26:17]

These tips emphasize mindfulness in purchasing decisions, ensuring that each acquisition adds genuine value to the consumer’s life without cluttering their space or finances.

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6. Embracing a Shopping Detox

Christina shares her experience with distancing from sales:

"I distanced myself from it all. Not intentionally, but that really helped sort of take me out of the sales countdown."
— Christina Mychas [14:54]

The hosts discuss the benefits of taking a break from sales promotions and social media influences. By reducing exposure to advertising and setting personal boundaries, individuals can better resist the temptation to make impulse buys and focus on what truly matters.

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7. Budgeting and Financial Preparedness

Signe highlights the role of budgeting:

"If it's something that you've made room for in your budget already, which is kind of like a way to... it's wishlisting in a different way."
— Signe Hansen [13:32]

Establishing a clear budget before the sales begins allows shoppers to allocate funds specifically for desired items, minimizing the risk of overspending. This financial discipline ensures that purchases remain within one’s means and align with personal financial goals.

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8. Reflecting on Consumption Habits

Alyssa connects daily practices to Black Friday behavior:

"I think the way you approach Black Friday can happen as an isolated incident [...] Consistently asking yourself what do I have in my closet already [...] sets you up for success on a day like Black Friday."
— Alyssa Beltempo [22:27]

By cultivating everyday habits of gratitude, inventorying personal belongings, and practicing mindful consumption, individuals can approach Black Friday with a clearer perspective, making more intentional and satisfying purchasing decisions.

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Conclusion

The episode wraps up with a reinforcement of the core message: mindful and intentional shopping practices can transform the Black Friday experience from a chaotic spree into an opportunity for meaningful acquisitions. The hosts encourage listeners to implement the discussed strategies, ask themselves critical questions before making purchases, and support sustainable and small businesses during the sales season.

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Notable Quotes:

• Christina Mychas [01:33]:
  "I think probably the best way to take advantage of a sale is by having something in mind ahead of time."

• Alyssa Beltempo [07:05]:
  "There was something about creating this sense of urgency that didn't exist in the first place to make a purchase that just doesn't sit well with me."

• Christina Mychas [11:03]:
  "When a small business offers a Black Friday discount, they’re making a monetary sacrifice."

• Alyssa Beltempo [24:04]:
  "What do I already have that could satisfy this need or want that I have?"

• Christina Mychas [26:31]:
  "What will this look like after I've worn it?"

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Final Thoughts

This episode of Sustain This! serves as an essential guide for anyone looking to navigate Black Friday sales with intention and mindfulness. By incorporating the hosts’ strategies, listeners can enjoy the benefits of discounts while maintaining their values of sustainability and conscious consumption.

For more in-depth discussions and community support, listeners are encouraged to join the podcast’s membership channel and engage with the hosts on social media.

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Join the Conversation

If you have tips on approaching sales, use a wish list effectively, or want to share your experiences with Black Friday shopping, let us know in the comments below or connect with us on Instagram @SustainThisPodcast. Your feedback helps us create more valuable content tailored to your needs.

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Subscribe and Support

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Transcript

[Alyssa]

Welcome to Sustain this, a podcast where we discuss mindful consumption, personal style, and the quest for living a more intentional life. I'm Alyssa, a sustainable stylist.

[Christina]

And I'm Christina, a shopaholic turned minimalist. Ish.

[Sina]

And I'm Sina, a color consultant and slow fashion style coach.

[Alyssa]

Together we will unpack the nuances of what it really means to be a conscious consumer and find more joy in what we have right now. So grab your tea, your coffee, or whatever floats your boat and join us in the conversation. Let's go.

[Sina]

Yay.

[Alyssa]

Yay.

[Sina]

Hello everyone. Welcome back to the podcast. We are going to be diving into the topic of sales today, more specifically Black Friday, because that's, that's getting close. And I think depending on where you are, even throughout all of November, I'm sure you've been exposed to like sales and quote unquote, good offers everywhere you look. We actually did make a similar episode evolving around Black Friday in sales last year. But in case you're new, we thought it would be good to dive into the topic again and maybe we have some new tips. Who knows, Maybe we've learned, learned a few things over the year, but we're going to talk about how to survive Black Friday or sales in general and give you some of our best tips in that area today. I, I don't have anything like on my to buy list that I'm like hunting out for the sales. I don't know about you guys, if you have something that you're specifically looking for to get for a good price if you will.

[Christina]

Nothing major on my wish list, but I do think that is a great tip to start off with. This may seem counterintuitive because I think like, I love the idea that ignorance is bliss and you can unsubscribe from emails and you can get off social media and you can kind of just take yourself out of those involuntary exposures to all the sales and all the must haves and all the kind of hype and frenzy. But I think probably the best way to take advantage of a sale is by having something in mind ahead of time. Because I'm of the mindset that you're not really getting a deal and you're not saving any money if you weren't planning on buying that thing at full price or weren't planning on buying it in the first place. So I think it's always a good idea to have something on your wish list and sort of seek that out and, but like, don't spend time get the thing you Want and then get out. Like, because once you let yourself start browsing and start being like, oh, what else is on sale? Yeah, that's when it can kind of turn into that whole buyer's remorse thing or over buying. And the thing with sales too, I find is like, especially with Black Friday or Boxing Day or, you know, the holiday season, there's a lot of restrictions around returns. Like they don't let you. They either don't let you return it or you have to wait a certain period of time to be able to return it or like you have to pay extra to send it back, that type of thing. So also kind of like knowing what the policies are, like knowing the risk will reward of even getting that sale in the first place, I think is all really helpful just to sort of just keep it focused. That's like the main goal, I think, is just keeping it focused.

[Sina]

Yeah, yeah, I agree. Yeah. I would always ask myself, would I have bought this piece if it wasn't on sale in the first place? I think that's always a very good, a good starting point.

[Alyssa]

Having a plan and a list. It's always, it's always the best, the best thing to do, I think. Yeah, I think for. Yeah.

[Christina]

I almost find though, like, do you find Black Fridays even good? Like, I sometimes find some, some, some. I think, you know, some brands totally do honor that tradition of like getting pretty good deals or perhaps they only do it around Black Friday. But sometimes I find, at least from the places I shop at, like, the better deals are in January after the fact, you know, and I hear that too, because I'll usually do a no buy for the month of January every year and a lot of people opt out because of the January sales.

[Alyssa]

Oh, interesting.

[Christina]

Because they want to take advantage of.

[Sina]

That also because I think one of the things I like doing is to buy still things that I was planning on buying anyway, kind of off season. So for example, sometimes it can make sense to buy like winter shoes in, in the springtime because that's when they're on sale. And it' especially if it was a pair that you kind of had your eye on already. I feel like that's, that's really clever. Or even like Christmas decor. A lot of, you know, shops will like, put down the price of Christmas decor in January. So if you were planning on buying something and you, you know, then maybe January is a good time to like, buy that. But it's so, yeah, I completely, I completely relate to that because I, I've never really delved into the Whole Black Friday thing, either. And it's been more. If I see it kind of like by accident that some of my favorite brands are having a sale and I'm just having a look, and then maybe, you know, there were some things there that, okay, it's actually kind of nice to save some money on that piece. But otherwise, I've not really been super active in, like, seeking out the Black Friday sale or, like, diving into that. But I guess if you're, you know, again, and it can be any. It doesn't have to be just for fashion. It can also be if you're, like, getting a new kitchen installed or, you know, and you're buying all of the little bits from different places, depending on where they have the best sale. I know that a lot of people really, like, they spend a lot of time hunting down the best deals. I think that's another aspect for me. I don't really want to spend the time. Maybe I don't know if I'm lazy or, like, I don't know.

[Christina]

Like, you know, what you want, you know, what you need. Get out. Like, you're. You know, you're willing to. To pay the price for it to save that time. Yeah. Where some people really enjoy doing the price comparisons and all that kind of stuff. So.

[Sina]

Yeah.

[Christina]

Yeah. I guess it just depends, like, what's your personality type when it comes to shopping, sales and getting all of that?

[Alyssa]

I'm the same. Same as you, Sina. I don't. I don't sort of focus on the Black Friday get any specific deals, except when it comes to. For those bigger ticket items, like, if it's like, a TV or appliances, like you were saying, that's. That's where I apply it. Maybe it's because, as Christina was saying, in terms of behavior, I. I enjoy the hunt for a piece of clothing, for example. I enjoy looking for that all year round. I almost feel like I'm cheating if I buy it on Black Friday. Like. Like, I kind of just want. I don't want that to be. I don't want my purchase decision to be swayed by a sale or that sense of urgency or, like, someone telling me that, like, if I don't buy it now, then I'm gonna miss out. It's like, no, I've always wanted this thing. Like, let me do it on my own time, please. Thank you. Like, I think maybe I'm just so stubborn, but I don't.

[Christina]

Yeah, you're like, don't tell me what to do.

[Alyssa]

Yeah, don't tell me what to Do. Don't tell me when to buy my favorite thing. Like, I'll get it when I'm ready, you know? Like, I just. I don't know, so. And I don't, like, you know, what that. The whole. The whole sense of urgency, the whole sense of, like, frenzy. I've never. Even when I was working. Okay. I used to be a stylist for a shopping mall. And, like, Black Friday was huge. And we would, like, do TV segments, and I would be up at 5, and I'd be at the mall at 5, like, doing the TV segments and everything. And, you know, encouraging. Like, each of the brands had different sales. That was a great job, and it was a great launch pad for everything that I do today. But I remember still feeling like, this does not feel good to me. Like, this doesn't sit well with me. Not the fact that you can get a deal and you can buy something. Like, I think that's great. And I think if you have a big ticket item, you put it on your list. Like you said, you get in, you get out. But there was some there. There's something about creating this sense of not. Of urgency that didn't exist in the first place to make a purchase that I. That doesn't feel. That doesn't sit well with me. So I think that's why I'm resistant to. To. To that in the first place, if that makes sense.

[Sina]

Yeah, I think it's just.

[Alyssa]

It's just the whole. It's just the whole aura around it. Like, I'd rather be like, no, I'd rather hunt for a good piece. Like when. I don't know.

[Christina]

I don't know.

[Alyssa]

But everyone's different.

[Christina]

Too many exclamation points and too many. Yeah.

[Alyssa]

Too much yelling at me to buy stuff. Yeah.

[Christina]

Yeah.

[Sina]

I think.

[Christina]

Yeah.

[Sina]

Also, when you buy a lot of things secondhand, I feel like that's almost another benefit of buying secondhand. Or like, at least trying your best to buy secondhand. Is that you kind of. Because it's such a good deal already in many cases, depending on what you buy. But it's, you know, you don't really have that desire to make a good deal because you kind of feel like you're already making a good deal when you buy something.

[Christina]

Right? Yeah. But then if it's, like, on sale, it's like a bonus on top of that type of thing. One thing I do that I learned over the years to recognize is, like, Black Friday is also the biggest time of year for a lot of shops. Well, like, four Shops. So I think it's a nice opportunity if you have like, your favorite independent boutiques or like, small businesses. If you do want to shop, like, it might be nice to kind of give dive, you know, direct your money that way to support small and.

[Alyssa]

Great point.

[Christina]

All of that. When we think of Black Friday too, we're so used to. We see the, you know, we think of the images of, like, people trampling over each other to get like a TV or Xbox or something like that, or people pulling, like, fighting in the stores and all of that, which I don't know if Black Friday is really like that anymore because everything's online.

[Alyssa]

I think you're right.

[Christina]

Yeah. And in Canada, I will say it's like, not as big of a deal. Like, it's not. I think the deals aren't as good in general, the discounts. But there's no, there's not. It's not as much of a thing. I think it's more of an American thing. Was Black Friday born in the U.S. yes. Yeah.

[Sina]

So, yeah, because it's the. What? It's the Friday after something.

[Christina]

Thanksgiving.

[Sina]

Yeah, Thanksgiving.

[Alyssa]

Yeah.

[Christina]

Yeah. So, but I just find like, the discounts and stuff like that in the US are in general better. So maybe that's why it's like such a. More a thing. Yeah. I think if you have something in mind or if you want to do a little shopping or whatever it is, or get your Christmas gifts, I think it's nice to like, see if you can do it small.

[Alyssa]

Yeah, that's a great.

[Christina]

Or like, from your favorite. From your, like, focus in on your favorite brands and then kind of like, yes, again, get in, get out.

[Alyssa]

Yeah, that's a really great point because I can only imagine for small businesses what a. How impactful that could be. But even, like, I know a lot of them don't participate as much or give as deep discounts because if you're, if you're a small business, think about it, like, December is going to be your biggest month. Why are you going to cut your margins right before December? Like, that's a tough decision to make. So when a small business even does offer a Black Friday discount, like, oh, my God, like, I just hope. I think we need to recognize the, the monetary sacrifice they're making in that decision. That's huge. They're selling their best inventory at a, At a reduced price, you know, like for. I don't know, for. And I'm sure. And you know what, it has the same repercussions for a really big brand. But they can offset it with. They have the volume. Right. Small businesses don't have the volume to offset that. That loss. So. Great point, Christina. To support the smaller independent brands. Yeah. I don't know. It's tough. It's so interesting. I was thinking how. I was talking about how I don't like, like the sort of frenzied aura and yet when I shop in person, I was just talking about how I get really competitive. So maybe that's. Maybe that's. Maybe it just triggers something in me that I don't like about myself. And that's why I.

[Christina]

Oh, my gosh, you're funny.

[Alyssa]

I don't know. I don't know. It's interesting. Other tips. I honestly think the list and going in with your plan is the most important because as soon as you allow yourself to explore. It's true. That's a slippery slope to getting things that you didn't need in the first place.

[Christina]

I think sometimes too, when we think of wish listing, it's like, at least in my head, my mind immediately goes to. It's like, oh, I have this one thing in mind. But you can have multiple items on your wish list. Like, you can search for it, but I just think it's. I really don't. I hate the like, mental gymnastics part of like, should I buy this? Should I not? Like, you do start to feel. I don't know, I. I feel it like in my gut, like if I should or shouldn't. And then that's when like the impulsivity or like the kind of like off it mentality kind of comes in. And I don't like that.

[Sina]

I guess also budgeting. Right. Like, if it's something that you've made room for in your budget already, which is kind of like, you know, it's not like wish listing, but it, It's a way to.

[Christina]

It's. Yeah.

[Sina]

Okay. With the. Yeah.

[Christina]

It's wishlisting in a different way. Like, you're kind of. You're baking it in ahead of time. So. Yeah. Maybe if it's not a specific item, but rather a monetary budget that you set for yourself so you could get multiple things. If that's what you want to do, then I think that's also a really nice way to do it. But I think. I think intentionality is all about just having something for. At least for me, it really helps to.

[Sina]

It's.

[Christina]

It's about having something in mind, whether it be. It's just being prepared ahead of time.

[Sina]

Yeah.

[Christina]

What we kind of alluded to Earlier. Ignorance is bliss, baby. Maybe that's the day you take your social media detox. Maybe that day, if you did celebrate Thanksgiving holiday, maybe that's the day that you spend your time shopping your closet or decluttering or doing something that doesn't necessarily participate. Like, maybe that's the day you unplug. And I think that's, you know, you spent the day with family and being thankful for what you have. And it's just like, let's roll it over into the next.

[Alyssa]

I love that. Yes.

[Christina]

Yeah, that's a great practice.

[Alyssa]

Actually use that day to like be outside or whatever. Replace it with something else.

[Christina]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Alyssa]

Just remove yourself.

[Christina]

I actually didn't do that during the, the Sephora sale. I actually didn't end up buying anything at all. I did have a plan to purchase a leave in conditioner, but then I ended up traveling through during that time in the sale and I kind of forgot about it. So now I'm going to have to buy it at full price, which is fine by me because it's something that I'm, that I actually use and I'm willing to do that. And I don't feel bad that I missed out on that sale. But one thing I noticed, whether if, if you struggle with over consumption in a certain area or you just struggle with shopping in general, I think when, and I, and I get that it's like a hobby and it's things that we love, but like, when that's all we think about, I think it's really hard to stay away from that temptation. So like, for example, if you're doing like a no buy in makeup, but then you're still keeping up with like the latest launches or continuing to watch like makeup content and that type of thing, I feel like it still creates this temptation. Sometimes it's good to have a little bit of a detox from it all. So, so what I'm getting at here is like if I kept watching Sephora sale content, like my Sephora sale picks things that are actually worth it or even let me de. Influence you from some products, it still kind of creates this like, trigger in my mind that I should be shopping that sale. But this time I was. I kind of distanced myself all from it. Not, not really intentionally, but I think that really helped. It really helped sort of take me out of the sales counting down. You better get your 15, 20% off, you know, But I think it's like when you, when you surround yourself with that and that's kind of all you're thinking about, then it's really, really hard to abstain from that. You know what I mean?

[Sina]

Yeah, yeah. Like you said, ignorance is bliss. Like, it's easier to stay focused on something else if you're not even, like, aware that it's happening.

[Christina]

Yeah.

[Sina]

I think that's also why, you know, if you're doing a, like, just speaking of no buys or low buys, since we are, like, reaching the end of the year and maybe a lot of people are, like, looking into maybe doing that next year, I think it's always nice to have a little bit of a plan or at least, like, have some things you can do instead of shopping. Not necessarily like a weekly plan, but just some, like, set some little challenges or something that you can replace that behavior with. I think is always a good exercise.

[Christina]

Yeah. I think at least for me, physically reminding myself of what I have is. Has always just been like the number one deterrent. Again with like, let's going back to the Sephora sale. I had all kinds of things in my cart blushes and, oh, I want to try this, I want to try that. And this looks nice, and this is a great chance to buy it. And I don't think that's a bad mindset, by the way. Like, if there's something that you want to try that you're curious about and you enjoy doing makeup or skincare or whatever it is. Like, if you're planning, if you want to buy something, then obviously buy it on sale. I'm not anti sale, nothing like that. But I had that mindset and it's a great excuse for me to buy into things, but then I have, like, all this makeup that I'm like, never gonna get through in a lifetime. You know, it takes so long to go through me. I've been using the same blush for over a year, and it's still going, you know, how much more. Yeah, at least for me. How much more do I really need? So what I actually. I literally physically got up and went to my makeup bag and I was like, oh, I have this. Oh, I forgot I had this. And like, does this even. Is this even still good? Is this even still in date? And you can do that for clothes. You can do that for. For anything that you're thinking about buying, which is why I think I was caught. We talked about it in our am in our ask us anything in the membership community. We sort of talked about shopping behaviors and shopping goals. And I just came back from Los Angeles where we did a lot of thrifting and a lot of Shopping in person. And it is so much. I can't believe how much easier it is for me to walk away from things. And every time I do it, I'm just reminded of it. And I think it's. When I'm here in Toronto, I don't make efforts to shop in person as much, but when we were in la, we kind of had nothing but time. So we were shopping and perusing around and browsing and stuff like that. And having that tactile and physical connection with that piece, it just makes me think so much more about what do I already have? How am I going to make room for this? Am I going. How am I going to fit this in my carry on? You kind of think about how that piece is going to fit into your life a little bit more and even how it could be a burden. So.

[Sina]

Yes. Yeah. The burden piece is something I find really helpful. Like, even if you're shopping online or if you're just talking about, like, for example, we've talked about. Because I don't know if it's the same in Canada, but air fryers are, like, huge right now. It's, like, so trendy, Everyone.

[Alyssa]

I think that was like a year or two ago. It was like a big thing.

[Sina]

It's like. Like, you can get cookbooks, and it's like you can cook apparently, in an air fryer. So it's like on everybody's lips. And apparently it's. It's like a must have for the kitchen. And we've been kind of back and forth about it because we bought, like, a rice cooker and we've used it like five times. It's just sitting in a drawer now.

[Christina]

Yeah. And.

[Sina]

And now it's like. And it's like, sometimes you need to catch that even before it happens. And like, you say, Christina, you need to think about the burden of getting rid of that item or, like, you know, or making space. What am I going to do with it? It's just taking space up in my kitchen. Like, it's. It's so stupid. So we haven't bought an air fryer because I'm like, you know, give it two years, it's gonna blow off. We can make it in the oven. We'll be fine, you know.

[Christina]

Yeah, yeah. It's okay to use oil. Yeah, exactly.

[Alyssa]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Sina]

It's kind of like we had in the 90s, like a. I don't know what the English term is. Like a. It's called a raclette. So it's like, oh, my God, I love Raclette.

[Alyssa]

Yes.

[Sina]

Yeah, I do too. And we had one, but we used it twice.

[Alyssa]

It's very cool.

[Sina]

Over like 15 years or something. How do you say it's a thing? It's.

[Alyssa]

Sorry, go ahead.

[Sina]

Yeah. Got rid of it.

[Alyssa]

You have to explain it.

[Sina]

Yeah, we got rid of it in the end. Yeah. But it's something. You place it on the dining table and then you can like plug it in and it's like a little electric krill almost. Yeah. And oven pans and you can like fry eggs and like you sit around it for a long time, like kind of like fondue.

[Alyssa]

So you have, it's like a two step thing. So there's like the grill on top and then there's like a little oven on the bottom. And then you have all of these like veggies or meat or bread. And then you have an assortment of cheeses and an assortment of sauces. And you have this little like baby pan and you put your stuff. Well, you put it on top first.

[Christina]

I missed the memory.

[Alyssa]

Then you stick it in and then you bake. And then you put cheese on it and then you bake. It's like a whole thing. It's lovely.

[Sina]

You do for an entire evening. It's actually quite nice. But we just never used it. So it's like, I think thinking about like the burden of having to get rid of it and also the bad. You'll also feel kind of bad because it's like, I never used this and now I'm getting rid of it. It was a waste of money. It was a waste of resources even. So I think it's always good to like put that at the front. Like, what am I gonna do if this turns out that it's not, you know, not to be the best purchase?

[Alyssa]

I think all of this has me sort of thinking about how our, our daily behaviors and mindset inform how we're going to act on Black Friday or any sale day. Like, I don't think the way you approach Black Friday can happen as an isolated incident. I think the more you practice, for example, shopping your closet, shopping your makeup bag, if you do it daily and you're consistently asking yourself, what do I have in my closet already? Or if you're consistently practicing gratitude for the things that you already have, or if you know then this is this, you've already set yourself up for success on a day like Black Friday. It's like all of that front end work will make that day and dealing with any sale that comes up a whole lot easier. So I think everything that we were talking about makes me think of that about, like, so. So don't beat yourself up if you get to Black Friday. And like, these aren't. This is a new way of thinking. Right? Like, oh, maybe I don't buy the thing. Maybe I see what I have instead. Like, these things take time and practice. And like I said, daily. Like we've talked about it, daily practice. But there it made me think of maybe two questions that you could ask yourself if you do find yourself shopping in person or online. And I think the first question could be always, like, what do I have? Do I have anything at home that would do similar thing? And we've talked about this before, like, this kind of question.

[Christina]

Yeah.

[Alyssa]

To ask yourself, what do I already have that could satisfy this need or want that I have? And then the second question could just be like, would I be buying this if it wasn't on sale? And then maybe like, as a little gatekeep for those. For yourself if you find yourself in a. Like when Christina, you were saying, like, mental gymnastics. Maybe those two things can. Can be good to implement.

[Christina]

Yeah. And we talked about it in again in our bonus episode on the Membership on the Membership Channel. If you guys want to join, you just hit join down below. Helps us. Help support us. And we appreciate you. But we talked about asking the question. I think a very natural question too is, do I need this? Versus do I want this? Do I need. This is not a very strong question to ask. It's really not like, as. As we were saying, especially if you have your needs met like most of us do. If you're listening to this or watching it on YouTube or watching it on your smartphone, like, you very likely have all of your needs met, your basic human needs. So of course you're going to say no, like, we don't need anything. Right. So I saw another reframe of this question that I really liked and it's can I live without it?

[Alyssa]

Oh, I like that.

[Christina]

Yeah. And I do like that. I mean, and I think, like, yes, you can. I don't know, I just think it reframes it in a different way because. And I do think it's perfectly okay to create space for the wants that you have. But can I live without it Makes me think of, like, maybe there's something better that I can hold out for. Or, like, it kind of starts a reframe of, you know, am I buying this just because it's on sale? Or like, what do I have that's similar? And why is this different or better than what I already have, you know, because I've asked the question, like, do I need this? I always say no. And that doesn't often may stop me, you know, because I can create. Not that I create justifications or like little dances in my head of, like, why I need something. In my gut I know that I don't. So it's like, what. What's pushing me to actually buy this thing? So I think there's other questions that we can start asking to see if you're willing to let that purchase go.

[Sina]

Or not, or even willing to let that purchase get into your life, because does it require maintenance? And are you willing to do the maintenance? And yeah, yeah, that's good.

[Alyssa]

It forces a little honesty in yourself.

[Christina]

The other question I really like is one that you've brought up a few times, Sina, is like, what will this. What will this look like after I've worn it? After it's worn in, after it's no longer new anymore? Because I think that's what is new always becomes old. And I think it's a matter of, you know, when things are starting to fray or maybe it's stained or it loses its shape a little bit or it stretches or it gets a scuff or whatever it is. Are you still gonna be like, no, I love this. I'm so excited to wear it. I. Or like when you pull it out and you're just like, yes, I can't wait to wear this, you know?

[Sina]

Yeah. Because I think often we. We also hear that, okay, ask yourself how you're feeling right now. And I think, yeah, that's great. But I think that can easily change, like on a day to day. And I think the. The way you feel about a piece, if it's really the right piece, then you're still going to feel excited about that piece even when you started wearing it, and not just when you opened the box because you were feeling a little bit low before. And then it becomes this little dopamine kick or, you know, so something that lasts beyond that, beyond unboxing the piece.

[Alyssa]

Hopefully that helps you feel a bit more confident as you move into Black Friday. Let us know if you have any tips on how you like to approach sales or if you use a wish list, particularly in these situations. Let us know in the comments below. And definitely, yeah, join. Join the little community if you want further deeper chats about these kinds of things. And thanks as always for watching. See you. And listening. See you with the next one.

[Sina]

Yes, thank you so much. For joining in our conversation this week. If you're enjoying the show, we'd love it if you subscribe to the podcast on Spotify and Apple and leave us a rating and review. It's one of the best ways to support the Sustain this podcast at zero cost to you.

[Christina]

We're also a community led podcast, so if you have any questions for us, topic requests, or even guests you want to hear from, please send us a DM on Instagram at. At Sustain this Podcast, we read all of our comments and look forward to hearing from you.

[Alyssa]

We hope you join us again next Tuesday where we'll talk about so much more than clothes. Ciao.