Billy Eichner

Summary

Thanks Dad with Ego Nwodim — Billy Eichner (May 26, 2026)

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Episode Overview

In this heartfelt and hilarious episode, Ego Nwodim sits down with actor and comedian Billy Eichner for an engaging conversation about family, growing up in New York, relationships, and finding comfort in entertainment. The episode weaves personal nostalgia, LGBTQ+ experience, and candid reflections on modern friendship, plus plenty of sharp humor. The duo discuss Billy’s new audiobook memoir, “Billy on Billy,” and play the podcast’s signature game, “Dad, Daddy, Father.” The episode closes with light-hearted questions and listener advice.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

The Importance of Articulating Needs in Friendships (02:00–04:50)

• Ego kicks things off talking about the pressure to spend money socializing and how to bring back “home hangs” as a free alternative.
• She emphasizes creating safe spaces for friends to express their desire to avoid spending money, suggesting low-cost and free activities: museums, parks, libraries, and simply “minding your business with a friend.”
• Humorous riff on “kissing is free—usually!” (03:20–03:44)
• Sets the tone for the episode: candid, supportive, and witty.

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Throwing the First Pitch & Childhood in Queens (04:56–07:09)

• Billy shares his excitement and nerves about throwing out the first pitch at a Mets game, relating it to his childhood growing up in Queens and writing about these experiences in his memoir.
• He reflects on his unathletic youth:

  “I was the worst kid on my Little League team... always being the tallest kid in my class but picked last for basketball.” (06:38–06:54)

• Turns this into a lesson on unlikely fulfillment:

  “It’s a nice lesson to show people you can be the worst on your Little League team and still one day throw out the first pitch.” (06:59–07:03)

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Family as Inspiration—Honoring His Parents (07:23–13:00)

• In response to “Who or what do you want to say thanks to?” Billy earnestly thanks his late parents:

  “They always let me be me... when it came to being gay, to having this intense interest in performing arts and show business, they encouraged me to chase my dream.” (07:36–08:23)

• Describes the writing of his memoir as both a “love letter” to his parents and a means to appreciate their support, especially in taking his desires seriously as a child. (08:31–09:01)

Parental Relationships & Personal Anecdotes

• His father: older, stoic, not physically affectionate, but loving via actions—took Billy to auditions and theater, read Page Six together, proudly showed Billy’s baby picture at shows.

  “He didn’t hug and kiss me a lot, but you could always feel how much he loved me... took me to Broadway shows, let me do things a ‘normal’ kid didn’t do.” (10:11–10:46)

• His mother: affectionate, warm, vivacious, “told everyone she loved them,” supportive of Billy’s interests, and encouraged his expressiveness (13:13–13:23).

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Sibling Dynamics & Only Child Anecdotes (12:08–18:35)

• Billy explains his relationship with his half-brother (Steve) but says he mostly grew up as an only child.
• Story from childhood:

  “My mother started to feel guilty I didn’t have a sibling. She asked if I wanted one, and I was like, you guys don’t have a lot of money. I have a ton of friends...last thing I want is some annoying brat to share my bedroom.” (17:46–18:30)

• Humorous reflection on how being an only child let him do whatever he wanted, and perhaps cemented his independence.

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Career Moves: New York to LA and Back (19:12–21:30)

• Billy discusses moving to LA for work (editing with Funny or Die, then Parks and Recreation), his initial excitement at living in Hollywood, and ultimately his return to New York:

  “I just need that New York energy in my life. I’m a New Yorker.” (20:23–21:01)

• Noted he lived in LA for 10 years without ever driving—uses this as a segue into lifelong decisions and city-vs-city lifestyles.

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New Yorker Qualities & Quirky Fears (21:33–24:19)

• Billy describes himself as “pretty fearless, except when it comes to driving” and shares a list of basic things that terrify him: driving, skating, lighting matches, riding a bike.

  “There are basic things that everyone can do that I’m scared to do... but I can run up to a stranger and shout at them on the street, which I’ve been doing for years.” (22:42–23:01)

• Funny anecdote from Ego about accidentally setting her front yard on fire as a child (22:04–22:18).
• Billy notes he never learned to drive because he grew up with the subway, and now worries about his mind wandering behind the wheel.

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Dance, Coordination, and the Theater Kid Life (27:40–29:00)

• Billy admits to taking dance classes as a theater major but says dancing was not his strength. He jokes about bullshitting through modern dance, envies dancers' bodies, and prefers tap because “you can mostly stand in one place.”
• Quote:

  “Tap looks fun... doesn't require that same type of, like, ballet grace. I don’t want to get canceled!” (28:39–28:52)

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Comfort Watches and Guilty Pleasures (32:31–37:27)

• Billy rejects the idea of “guilty pleasures”:

  “I try not to feel guilty about the things that I like to watch.” (32:31–32:42)

• Talks about liking “The Real World” as a teen, but as an adult, only watched “Real Housewives of Beverly Hills” during a tough time (his father was dying), praising it as an escape.
• His current comfort watches include:
  • The Comeback
  • Music documentaries ("Counting Crows" doc recently watched)
  • Gilmore Girls:

    “Once in a while, I’ll get under the covers and watch the Gilmore Girls and I’m not gonna feel ashamed about that.” (36:47–37:03)

  • Parenthood (both appreciate Lauren Graham).

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Taking Care of Yourself—Daily Life & Music (39:26–40:39)

• Billy finds solace in music: “I have music on constantly, from the second I get up, going to bed.”
• Talks about the specific pleasure of being in New York—able to walk among people, “main character energy,” but also remain anonymous.

  “I don’t necessarily want to know who my neighbors are, but I want to know they’re there.” (40:31–40:39)

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Friendship, Coming Out & Long-time Bonds (41:00–46:11)

• Billy tells an intimate story of his best friend Heath, how they met (speech and debate team at Stuyvesant High), the unspoken and eventual revelation of their mutual queerness, and how that deepened a lifelong friendship.

  “We were each other’s first gay hookup. We came out to each other in that moment... We’ve been best friends ever since. He’s like my brother.” (46:05–46:11)

• Humorous aside:

  “Brothers who once hooked up one time. What’s hotter than that?” (46:11–46:15)

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Love, Marriage, and Attachment (46:37–54:38)

• Billy is candid about his relationship status (“I am single. I date.”), feelings about marriage ("If it was important to my partner, I'd do it. Not against it, but I'm not dying to get married.") and children (“If you don’t have a burning desire, you probably shouldn’t have kids”).
• On attachment:

  “If you have to check in, it’s over. Save your time. Go meet someone that actually wants to text you back.” (53:12–53:44)

• His advice for friends in questionable relationships: Wait until they bring up issues before giving honest feedback, unless there's something abusive or urgent.

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Fun & Games — “Dad, Daddy, Father” (56:34–62:11)

• Ego introduces a racy twist on Fuck/Marry/Kill, with Billy helping clarify that in this version, “Daddy” is fuck, “Dad” is make love, and “Father” is just be friends.
• Hilarious debate on the rules of the game:

  “At this point, there are a lot of dads and daddies that I would probably fuck.” (58:28–58:32)

• A sample question about who to assign each label to (such as “guy with tattoos of his exes”) leads to more laughs.
• Quick shift to the “Thank U, Next” segment. Frankie Grande left a question: “What’s your favorite Celine Dion song?” Billy: “Taking Chances.” (62:37–63:08)
• Billy asks the next guest: “What is your least favorite Celine Dion song?” (63:14–63:20)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On New York upbringing:
  “So much of who I am and so much of my work is informed by having grown up here... I’m pretty fearless. Except when it comes to driving.” (21:38–21:54)

• On comfort TV during grief:
  “The only full season of Real Housewives I ever watched coincided with the three months my dad was dying in the hospital... All I could wrap my head around was Real Housewives.” (34:00–35:06)

• On attachment in dating:
  “If you have to check in too much... Goodbye. Go meet someone that actually wants to text you back.” (53:12–53:44)

• On parental support:
  “They always encouraged me to chase my dream, not knowing what was gonna happen.” (07:36–08:23)

• On family rituals:
  “I would go to the movies with my parents every Saturday night, literally religiously. Even if there was nothing we wanted to see, we would just pick something and go.” (38:17–38:34)

• On identity and genuine friendship:
  “We were each other’s first gay hookup. We came out to each other in that moment and hooked up in that moment. We’ve been best friends ever since. He’s like my brother.” (46:05–46:11)

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Segment Timestamps

• 00:00–03:45 — Ego’s opening monologue on summer, friendship, and free hangs
• 04:56–07:09 — Billy discusses throwing out the first pitch & his NYC roots
• 07:23–13:00 — Family, memoir, and how parents shaped Billy’s life
• 13:13–18:35 — Sibling dynamic, only child stories
• 19:12–21:30 — Career moves, New York vs LA
• 21:33–24:19 — “New Yorker” qualities, driving phobia, and quirks
• 27:40–29:00 — Dance & coordination as a theater kid
• 32:31–37:27 — Guilty pleasures, comfort watching, and “Gilmore Girls”
• 39:26–40:39 — Self-care: music, walking, urban energy
• 41:00–46:11 — Longtime friendship, coming out, deep bonds
• 46:37–54:38 — Dating, marriage, kids, modern relationship advice
• 56:34–62:11 — Dad, Daddy, Father (game) and “Thank U, Next” (Celine Dion Q&A)

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Tone & Style

Warm, honest, and playful throughout, with hallmark Ego Nwodim wit, Billy’s brash New York humor, and genuine heart. The guests’ recollections are personal and revealing, with banter interlaced with real insights on identity, grief, and finding joy in the little things.

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For Listeners Who Haven't Heard It

This is a lively, candid episode that explores family dynamics, queer coming of age, modern friendship, nostalgia, and self-care—always with big laughs and sharp, real talk. Billy Eichner’s stories will resonate with anyone who grew up feeling different, cherished parental support, or ever struggled with the rules of modern relationships. The “Dad, Daddy, Father” segment is a hilarious twist you won’t hear elsewhere.

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End of Summary

Transcript

[Ego Wodem]

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[Billy Eichner]

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[Ego Wodem]

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[Billy Eichner]

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[Ego Wodem]

527 while supplies last selection varies by location. See lowe's.com for details. Visit your nearby Lowe's. Ooh, it's almost summer. I like to think that basically the whole year, it's almost summer. That makes me feel really happy to say that. I get excited at the notion that it's almost summer. I mean, it is. I'm wearing a literal sweater right now. Talking about it's almost summer. It's not that warm outside. But it's got me thinking about how much summer makes us go out and meet up with friends. And things are expensive right now. Things. Have you seen the cost of gas? The cost of eggs? I know you see it. So here's the thing. I think we should be hanging. First of all, you know that I want us bringing friend like home hangs back home hangs bring them back home hangs bring them back to the conversation. We don't have to go out. We don't have to spend money. But here's the thing. If you want to hang out with your friends and you don't want to spend money, you got to say, hey, I don't really want to spend money. You know, just say, hey, I don't want to spend money on this hang. Can we go for a walk? Can we go on a hike? Can I come to your home? Can I infiltrate your pantry? Things like that. Because it's awkward going out and everyone has a different idea of what they're supposed to be spending out. And I don't want that for any of us. And so I feel like it should be kosher and above board to be like, hey, I want to hang out with you, I want to see you, but I don't want to spend money. Or I don't want to spend a bunch of Money. Let's do a coffee. Let's do a smoothie. Or let's truly just go outside and look at the stars. That's fun, too. Just on my mind. I don't want people to feel like they have to spend money. And when you don't want to spend money, you're, like, trying to save up or whatever. Like, you should be able to do that. So don't. That's what I think we should do. We should just articulate ourselves and say, this is what I'm envisioning for the hangout. Because summer is upon us, which means people gonna be hanging out a lot more. And I think it's okay to say what you need. We should make a pact with our people and be like, I'm going to not judge you for saying you don't want to spend money. And I'm going to say to you, I don't want to spend money if that's the case. And I know it's awkward and weird, but we love our friends, and let's make it safe for each other. Okay? Come on. There's so many things. The museum. The museum is free. Often the parks. It's like we rediscovered parks back in 2020. Christopher Columbus, that shit. And we're like, oh, my goodness, there's parks. I forgot about parks. What else is there to do that's free? What else?

[Billy Eichner]

Library.

[Ego Wodem]

Library is free. I haven't even been to the library in my neighborhood. I need to get in there. I mean, what else? Minding your business is free. You can mind a business. You can mind your business with a friend. Mind your business with a loved one. You could read a book that's free in many ways. It can be at the library. What else is free? Kissing. Kissing is generally free. I had to check in. I'm like, are we paying for kissing? I don't know what the market rate for kissing is right now. Kissing is generally free. Kiss. Kiss somebody. Of course, with consent, but it's free, generally speaking. There's so many things to do for free. And spending money can be a lot, and things add up. But I want us to say. And I want us to make it safe for our friends to say, I ain't trying to spend money, but I do want to see you maybe kiss you, you know? Anyway, up next, I'm about to have a really cool conversation, I hope it's cool with Billy Eichner. And I cannot wait. I can't wait to have it. I can't wait for you to listen. Here it is. How Are you doing?

[Billy Eichner]

I'm great. How are you?

[Ego Wodem]

I'm good. Do you have a good weekend coming up?

[Billy Eichner]

I do. I'm throwing out the first pitch at the Mets Yankees game tonight at Citi Field.

[Ego Wodem]

This is exciting.

[Billy Eichner]

It is very exciting. Though I'm a little nervous. I'm sure by the time people see this, it will have happened. So my career might be over. This might be my last interview. Been practicing.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

And it's a very, very exciting invitation to get.

[Ego Wodem]

It's huge. Which team invited you?

[Billy Eichner]

The Mets.

[Ego Wodem]

The Mets team.

[Billy Eichner]

Because it's at Citi Field.

[Ego Wodem]

It's at Citi Field.

[Billy Eichner]

And I grew up in Queens when it was called Shea Stadium. Citi Field. And so it's a big deal. You know, my whole book is about growing up in Queens, so it's nice. Synergy.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah, I think so. I think this is. Are we doing overhand? Underhand?

[Billy Eichner]

I've been practicing, so. Yeah. Overhand. Okay. I was told to throw it like a slingshot.

[Ego Wodem]

Like a slingshot.

[Billy Eichner]

Slingshot, yeah. Except I do that.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

I don't know.

[Ego Wodem]

I was asked to throw out the pitch for the Orioles last year, but right after I dislocated my shoulder. So I was like, I can't really do anything and I'm right handed. But I'm now trying to steal a lesson from you.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah. You hold it like this. Which I didn't know.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

And then you. Well, you kind of. You gotta. You know, you're standing and then you have to like, lean in with your body.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah. And look at the catcher.

[Ego Wodem]

Look at the catcher.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah. Make eye contact.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh, from a distance.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

Like a. Meet cute guy.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah. I hope so.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

I feel like it's gonna go great for you.

[Billy Eichner]

Thank you. I just don't wanna be horribly embarrassing. People keep telling me, well, you won't be as bad as like, 50 Cent when he did it. Or Baa babui from Howard Stern. You know, like, people have really messed it up.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. Okay. I think you're gonna be okay. Are you athletic at all?

[Billy Eichner]

No, no.

[Ego Wodem]

This is.

[Billy Eichner]

I was the worst kid on my Little League team. I was in the unique position of always being the tallest kid in my class, but picked last for basketball, you know, which is so awkward. That is brilliant, by the way. They shouldn't have picked me any sooner than that. Cause I was terrible. But I think this is a nice lesson to show people that you can be the worst on your Little League team and still be asked one day to throw out the first pitch at the Metro. Okay.

[Ego Wodem]

You heard it here first. Anything is possible.

[Billy Eichner]

Exactly. I'm an inspiration, really. Ultimately, yes. Okay.

[Ego Wodem]

I have to do an intro for you so that people know, if they don't already know.

[Billy Eichner]

Okay. Yeah, please.

[Ego Wodem]

My next guest, who I've already been talking to for some time now, is an actor and comedian whose memoir, Billy on Billy, an audio Memoir, is out now. It's Billy Eichner. Hi. Hello again.

[Billy Eichner]

Thank you for having me.

[Ego Wodem]

I'm so happy you're here. Thank you for coming. Who or what do you want to say thanks to?

[Billy Eichner]

Oh, I want to say thanks to my parents, even though they're dead.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

That's okay.

[Ego Wodem]

We can say thanks to dead people.

[Billy Eichner]

I'm grateful. For some time we thank dead people in this country. No, I wrote a whole book, Billy on Billy, which is. It started out as like the Billy on the street origin story. And we were trying to answer the question, what kind of child grows up to create a maniacal character like Billy on the Street? And really what it became is a love letter to my parents, you know, and to growing up in New York in the 80s and 90s. But really, they were so unbelievably supportive and encouraging. They always let me be me when it came to being gay, when it came to having this intense interest in the performing arts and in show business, they just always encouraged me to chase my dream, you know, not knowing what was gonna happen. And I only. I always knew they were great. But in sitting down to write this book. And again, my mom died when I was 20. My dad died when I was 32. But a month before Billy on the street became a TV show.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh, wow.

[Billy Eichner]

So they didn't see all the fun stuff happen. They saw, like, the years of really wanting and. Yeah, but they were so encouraging. And I realized when I sat down to write the book, thinking about all these stories came to mind from my childhood that I really don't sit around and think about very often. I don't live in the past like that, but it gave me a reason to do that, and it just gave me such an appreciation for this self respect that they gave me to take my desires seriously as a kid.

[Ego Wodem]

That is incredible. So I want to say thanks to them, too.

[Billy Eichner]

They're great, and I'm so excited for people to be introduced to them. And they were so funny, both native New Yorkers, lot of energy. So they were just remarkable, really.

[Ego Wodem]

That's very special. And I love to hear that they supported your endeavors and your passion for entertainment and for theater. Now, what Was your relationship like, with each of them?

[Billy Eichner]

My mom was. They were very different in terms of how physically affectionate they were, even though they were both very loving.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

My dad was much older than my mom, which is an odd thing. So kind of in our heads secretly. We always planned on, like, well, what's. What's my mom gonna do when my dad dies one day and then dies first?

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

You know, out of nowhere. So that was just very unexpected. But my dad was older than my mom. It was a second marriage for him. My dad was born in 1930. He was in the Korean War. You know, he goes way back. Speaking of throwing out the first pitch, my dad used to tell me he saw Babe Ruth play.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh, wow. Okay. That's great.

[Billy Eichner]

If my dad was alive now, he'd be, like, 95 or something.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

But he's from the Bronx. If, you know the Alan Arkin character in Little Miss Sunshine, he was kind of like that.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

You know, kind of very blunt, not very physically demonstrative. You know, kind of old school. He didn't, like, hug and kiss me a lot, but you can always feel how much he loved me and supported me. He took me to auditions as a kid when I was trying to be a child actor. We read Page Six together. We read all the gossip columns together. He took me to Broadway shows. You know, my parents took me to see Madonna at the Blonde ambition tour in 1991, where she's, like, pretending to masturbate on stage surrounded by gay men in bras. In 1991, they let me do this and did not make me feel at all uncomfortable about it. They loved Madonna.

[Ego Wodem]

Right.

[Billy Eichner]

And so. But my dad was a little more stoic on the outside, but always really defended me and was very excited when I started to do comedy in my 20s. And I'm on stage, I'm being so loud and crazy, and I'm ranting and raving about everything from pop culture to, like, gay sex, everything. And my dad would come to every show.

[Ego Wodem]

Wow.

[Billy Eichner]

And he would walk around the audience, and before the show started, I swear, my mom's not alive at this point. And he's like a guy in his 70s at this point. And he would walk around with my baby picture and go up to strangers in the audience and show them my photo and be like, see this? That's Billy. I'm the father. Right. And then the show starts, and I am shouting about, like, getting fucked.

[Ego Wodem]

And so they're watching you and him being like. And what is it was.

[Billy Eichner]

I mean, it was really lovely. So my dad was great. My mom was the opposite in terms of how physically affectionate she was. An incredibly warm, optimistic, you know, sort of typical Jewish mother, and how close we were, but more kind of vivacious than that stereotype implies. She kind of had a little bit of a sexiness about her. My parents met at a disco in 1976 called the Jungle on Long Island. You know, they were New Yorkers. They liked to have fun, and they were just fabulous people.

[Ego Wodem]

Wonderful. Do you have siblings?

[Billy Eichner]

I have an older half brother, Steve Eichner, who I knew as a kid, but he mostly grew up with his mom, and we didn't grow up together in the same apartment. So, you know, he was around. I saw him. He's a photographer. And when I was trying to be a child actor in New York, he took all of my child actor headshots, which I just posted recently. They're very funny and ridiculous. So we, you know, we're friends, but I was raised mostly as, like, an only child. Really?

[Ego Wodem]

Sure. And your dad was the common denominator between you and Steven.

[Billy Eichner]

That's right.

[Ego Wodem]

And you say he was more stoic than your mother and not as physically affectionate. Was your dad one to say I love you?

[Billy Eichner]

No. He didn't say it out loud. And I remember once my mom got mad at him, it never bothered me because my dad so clearly loved me. Right. It wasn't cold, you know, he just wasn't a big kisser and hugger, by the way. Neither was his mother. Just his side of the family. They just weren't as affectionate, weren't as physically demonstrative. And my mother was all over me and all over everyone.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

My mother told the dry cleaner she loved him. She told everyone she ran into. I love you, love you, love you, love you, she would say to everyone. And my dad was not like that. His love was a bit more subdued.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

But you could see it in his eyes. But once my mom got mad at him because he never hugged me and never actually said, I love you a lot. And then he came over to me. I was in my bedroom watching tv. I was just. I was like. I was like, can you guys just shut up and let me watch, like, David Letterman? Like, leave me alone. I just want to. I don't care. I know you love me. It's fine. But my mom was upset about it.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

And he came over to me in bed and, like, leaned over, and he was like, you know I love you, right? And I was like, yeah, of course I do. Like, leave me alone. Get out of this.

[Ego Wodem]

I'm part of this. What's happening here? I know.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

It's weird when you say it. Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

I'm just like, I know. I know. And I did know. I did. You know, I mean, you know, and I. And I also understood even then, he was from an older generation of men who didn't say I love you as easily. You know, they weren't as vulnerable. He got softer as he aged, which happens with people. And. But, yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

Were you closer to one parent than the other

[Billy Eichner]

as, like, a young gay child? I was closer with my mother when she was alive, though there were certain things my dad did with me that my mom wouldn't do. My dad got off work more easily than my mom, so he would take me to auditions in Manhattan. We grew up in Queens. And he would take me into the city to audition for commercials and musicals. I barely got anything. I was. I don't know if you know this story. I played John Goodman's son in a sketch on SNL when I was 14 years old.

[Ego Wodem]

I didn't know that. Oh, wow.

[Billy Eichner]

Yes. It was one of the only things I got.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

Except I got there and thought I was, like, the only one in the. Like, the only son in the sketch.

[Ego Wodem]

Like real life.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah, exactly. And then there were 25 kids playing his children in the sketch, and we were all just glorified extras. But it was amazing. Like, Chris Farley was in my sketch, and, like, all these Mike Myers. And this was the years of, like, Phil Hartman. So that was very exciting. My dad took me to all those things. But before my mom died, I was closer with my mom. You know, a young gay boy, like, you're closer with your mom? And because she was so affectionate.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

I think it was easier to be closer to her. My dad was a bit quieter then. When my mom died, you know, it forced me and my dad. And this actually happened with my half brother Steve, too. Like, we both got closer to my dad because now we really needed each other.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

And we had to be closer and, you know, and then he was basically doing the work for two parents.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh, wow. What kind of work did each of your parents do?

[Billy Eichner]

My dad worked for the city of New York. He was a commercial rent tax auditor. Basically going around to companies and saying, you know, you owe tax money to the city.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

My mom, he was an accountant by trade.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

My mom worked for what was then known as the phone company, which became New York Telephone and eventually becomes Verizon. She just worked in the office.

[Ego Wodem]

Bell Atlantic in there somewhere.

[Billy Eichner]

Bell Atlantic, I remember Bell Atlantic 9s. Bell Atlantic. That's exactly right. Okay, so she worked and it became Verizon. Yeah, she worked in the World Trade center when I was a kid. So I used to go to the World Trade center all the time for like her office Christmas parties and things. I have all these kind of interesting memories about the World Trade center because of my mom. But yeah, they were nine to five middle class people in Queens. I was an only child.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

So whatever they had I got. You know, that's one of the nice things about being an only child. But middle class people know show business connections. They loved show business from afar.

[Ego Wodem]

Sure.

[Billy Eichner]

My dad read all the gossip columns, the New York Post, you know, we watched Entertainment Tonight and all those shows and we'd watch all the award shows together. They loved. It started with me really falling in love with the theater and then kind of dragging them or begging them to take me to Broadway shows. But once we started doing that, they realized how much they loved the theater too. They loved the theater. You know, we didn't always sit in good seats, but we would go get discount seats somehow. And I saw a lot of theater growing up. Broadway, Off Broadway. They took me to see plays about like adult gay men that like a 12 year old normally doesn't see. And that all had an amazing impact on me.

[Ego Wodem]

That's incredible.

[Billy Eichner]

Really. I mean, they were so ahead of their time. And that's why the book is like a real tribute to them ultimately.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah, that's special. That's so special. And also the notion of growing up as an only child. You have this half brother at times. Did you ever wish for additional siblings?

[Billy Eichner]

I tell this story in the book. My mother, maybe when I was 10, I think she started to feel guilty that I didn't have a sibling. And she asked me, I guess before it was too late, she said, do you want a brother or a sister? Do you feel bad you don't have a sibling? And I really acquired my dad's like, Bronx, New York, inspired bluntness and just practicality. And I was like, look, you guys don't have a lot of money. I'm fine on my own. I have a ton of friends, you know, I get to do whatever I want to do. And the last thing I want is some annoying brat to share my bedroom with telling me like, what TV shows to watch. And you were 10, and I was like 10 already. It was very kind of Billy on the show Precocious. Very precocious. You Are only child New York City child actor, you know, dangerous combination.

[Ego Wodem]

It is a dangerous combination. It was. I don't want no damn siblings. That's funny.

[Billy Eichner]

And I think they were relieved. I think they were like, oh, thank God.

[Ego Wodem]

She's like, I don't want to do that. Cause I just found out because they don't teach women a lot about their bodies, you see, in school. So I just found out from a friend who had a baby that it takes two years for a woman's hormones to return to normal or what her norm is. That's crazy to me.

[Billy Eichner]

I love that. That is crazy.

[Ego Wodem]

You have no reason to. But I just needed to say it out loud.

[Billy Eichner]

Well, no, I'm happy. I see you.

[Ego Wodem]

You saved your mom.

[Billy Eichner]

Yes, my mom had the same hormones for all of her middle age.

[Ego Wodem]

That's good, I think. Billy, have you ever had any interest in living somewhere else, given you're so New York down?

[Billy Eichner]

Well, I actually did live in LA for 10 years.

[Ego Wodem]

You did?

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah, I did. And only last year moved back full time to New York.

[Ego Wodem]

What made you move?

[Billy Eichner]

At first it was work. Funny or die. The company produced Billy on the street and I am very, very hands on with the editing of the show because you have to be. It's so pivotal to that show, to any show, but especially a comedy like that. And I asked them, I said I need to be involved in the editing. But it was so low budget when we started that it was much cheaper for them to have me come out to LA to edit in their office. I know this is a fascinating story. People are on the edge of their seats.

[Ego Wodem]

Listen.

[Billy Eichner]

Okay, so that brought me out to la. Then I got Parks and Recreation. That kept me in la and I kept getting work. And LA was exciting and new and I was a kid who loved Hollywood, you know, grew up wanting to be a part of all of that. And so for a while it was really fun and different and New York was all I knew and I wanted a new experience. And then something happened. A few years ago, I really started to miss New York a lot and I started to visit and I visit more and more. And I just said, okay, I'm a New Yorker.

[Ego Wodem]

And you were like, I did it. I did la.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah. And it's lovely, you know, and Hollywood's going through a hard moment right now. It doesn't quite feel the same in la, sadly, that it did five, ten years ago.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

And so, I don't know, I just need that New York energy in my life.

[Ego Wodem]

Right. Were you walking in LA I'm that

[Billy Eichner]

crazy person that walked everywhere. I don't have a driver's license. I've never driven a car. I'm scared to drive. I don't go on wheels or blades. I can be in a car, but I don't like to be behind the wheel.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

And I strangely lived in LA for 10 years without a driver's license, but only in the years of Uber and stuff.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay, got it. Oh, my goodness, Billy, that stresses me out so much.

[Billy Eichner]

I'm not the only one.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

I remember early on. Maybe she now has a driver's license. Lena Dunham did not drive a car.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

Wow. Nathan Lane does not have a driver's license.

[Ego Wodem]

Out them.

[Billy Eichner]

Okay, Exactly.

[Ego Wodem]

Out them.

[Billy Eichner]

Outing them. Yeah, exactly. If it's good enough for Nathan Lane, it's good enough for me. But, yeah, I made it through somehow. Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

And then you came home and you're like, you don't need to go back. It sounds like I'll go back to

[Billy Eichner]

LA once in a while, but New York is the place for me.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. What would you say is your most New York quality?

[Billy Eichner]

Wow. I think so much of who I am and so much of my work is informed by having grown up here. My most New York quality, I'm pretty fearless. Except, I guess, when it comes to driving. I was gonna say maybe have the

[Ego Wodem]

wheel of a car.

[Billy Eichner]

Here's the thing. There are basic things that everyone can. That I'm scared to do.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

Drive a car. Go on ice skates, Light a match. I don't like fire.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh, I. Billy, you would be devastated to know I used to like to play with matches as a child and lit my front yard on fire by accident.

[Billy Eichner]

Wow. You see? I'm right.

[Ego Wodem]

You are right. But it all worked out.

[Billy Eichner]

I know.

[Ego Wodem]

I lit my front yard on fire. And then I got on snl and now I have a podcast.

[Billy Eichner]

So what? You just keep going. Look at this red room.

[Ego Wodem]

Yet.

[Billy Eichner]

Wait, what happened with the. What do you mean? The backyard.

[Ego Wodem]

My front lawn. I was playing with matches. Too young of an age. Wind blew and. And then I got nervous and dropped the match because I was like, I don't want. But I've told the story of the. I would hate to bore people with the story, but it was that. It's like. And then I dropped the match and then the front yard was on fire. Fire department ultimately came and everything was okay.

[Billy Eichner]

Everything was okay. And that scares me. Like, I can run up to a stranger and shout at them on the street, which I've been doing for Years. There are certain things that would scare a lot of people, which I have the wherewithal to do. Right. I can, like, steel myself and do it. And there are basic things that I'm terrified of that I cannot do.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay, so we have the driving. We have the fire. What else? Or matches.

[Billy Eichner]

I should say ice skates.

[Ego Wodem]

Ice skates? Yes.

[Billy Eichner]

Rollerblades. Like, when that was a thing, I was like, oh, God, no. I can't ride a bike.

[Ego Wodem]

You can't ride a bike?

[Billy Eichner]

I had a bike with training wheels as a kid in Queens, which. I love the training wheels. When the training wheels came off, I was like, oh, I didn't like that. And I got scared. I just. I don't like being on wheels or blades.

[Ego Wodem]

You don't like wheels or blades? You just don't like.

[Billy Eichner]

I love being.

[Ego Wodem]

You don't like the, like, unilateral aspect

[Billy Eichner]

of a. I don't trust myself with balance.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh.

[Billy Eichner]

Something about, I don't know, hand, eye coordination or. Well, when it comes to driving a car, I think my mind is gonna wander. I know it is.

[Ego Wodem]

Wow.

[Billy Eichner]

Because I didn't grow up having to drive because I was in the city. I took the subway to high school every day. I just never needed to. And then by the time I was older and thought, oh, maybe I should drive a car, I was in a place where I thought, my mind wanders so much. And I'm used to that being fine. Right. Because on the subway, your mind can wander. When you're walking, for the most part, you can listen to music, your mind can wander. And I was worried about my mind wandering and hurting myself and hurting other people on the road. It's just one of those things. I inherently know the world is better off without me behind the wheel. I know it is.

[Ego Wodem]

Fair enough. Let me tell you, I do drive, and people's minds do, in fact, wander.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah. That scares me.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. But we're out here.

[Billy Eichner]

Do you like driving?

[Ego Wodem]

I love driving.

[Billy Eichner]

People always say that.

[Ego Wodem]

I used to not like driving. I love driving. Did you grow up again? I grew up in Baltimore and then I went to college in la and traffic was. Yeah. So my first two years, I didn't drive, and I liked letting other people drive. And then I started driving, even being in traffic, and this is crazy. I lived on the west side, would perform at UCB east side, oftentimes in the evening. So that meant really bad traffic in la. This is boring. The traffic is worst going west to east because lots of people work on the west side. I lived on the west side. And I'd be heading east during rush hour. The worst time to be going in that direction. And I missed my commute. Once I got rid of my commute, I was like, I miss being in traffic.

[Billy Eichner]

Is that because it was just, like, alone time?

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. I was like, I'm catching up on phone calls. Hands free, of course.

[Billy Eichner]

Right, right.

[Ego Wodem]

And I'm, like, listening to music. I could hear an album all the way through.

[Billy Eichner]

The music part sounds fun to me. About driving.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah. I don't, but, you know, I walk and listen to my music.

[Ego Wodem]

Fair enough. Will you go in a Waymo?

[Billy Eichner]

I'm terrified of a Waymo. My friend just texted me for Mother's Day. What she wanted for Mother's Day, she's in San Francisco, was for her kids and her husband to take her in Uemo. This is what she wanted.

[Ego Wodem]

She's a cheap mom.

[Billy Eichner]

I was like, think bigger, mom. You're a mother of two. But she was very excited about it. She said they loved it.

[Ego Wodem]

They loved the Waymo.

[Billy Eichner]

Now when I'm in LA and I look over and I'm in an Uber and I look over and there's a driverless car, that shit still freaks me out. I'm not there yet. Emotionally, I'm not.

[Ego Wodem]

I mean, yeah, if you're not ready to have your driver's license, I can imagine for the reasons you're not ready.

[Billy Eichner]

I don't want to be behind the wheel, but I want someone to be behind the wheel.

[Ego Wodem]

Somebody needs to be there. It is jarring. But you look over. I've been in a Waymo. I do kind of love it. Because you. You don't have the whole negotiation. Sometimes you're feeling incredibly introverted. Because I go back and forth.

[Billy Eichner]

Right.

[Ego Wodem]

But you're feeling incredibly introverted. You get in a car, there's no one there. There's not the negotiation of, are we talking? How much talking? I get that yet. It can be terrifying. It is jarring. And there's so many more Waymos in LA in the last year than when I went. Truly a year ago, I was like,

[Billy Eichner]

oh, they're all over now.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

I wonder if it could work in New York. Is it?

[Ego Wodem]

I don't think that it's in New York yet. And I have had that curiosity myself.

[Billy Eichner]

Like, would this work here with the bikers and messengers?

[Ego Wodem]

Right. Billy, what would it take you to get in a Waymo? What would it take for you to get in a Waymo?

[Billy Eichner]

Look, I'm open to trying it.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

What I Can see happening is me learning to drive before. Like, the idea of me, like, on the freeway in la. God, that's terrifying.

[Ego Wodem]

Wow. But you don't feel uncomfortable having your safety in someone else's hands?

[Billy Eichner]

I have no choice.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

Sometimes I do. Like when you have an Uber driver who's clearly not great. Yeah, but I just sit there like, oh, God. Oh, God. But. But most of the time they're okay. Look, they're better than I would be.

[Ego Wodem]

Sure.

[Billy Eichner]

What am I gonna do, not go in a car ever? You know?

[Ego Wodem]

Did your dad drive? Mom drive?

[Billy Eichner]

My dad drove and my mom didn't drive. So maybe that has something to do with it.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. It's like you're. You're half non driver.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah, exactly. They made me confident about everything. But not driving, basically.

[Ego Wodem]

But also you said your coordination is off, which surprises me, given you love the theater. Like, did you ever take dance classes?

[Billy Eichner]

I did. I was forced to take dance classes as a musical theater student in college, but that was never my strong suit. I'm a good singer. You know, I was funny, I could act. But dancing was not, if a role required a lot of real dancing. I'm not getting it.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. There was. And was there a genre, though, that you were better at than others of the dancing?

[Billy Eichner]

I remember I took modern dance. You can kind of bullshit your way through that. I'm not saying I'm. I don't. Please don't Timothy Chalamet me. I love modern dance.

[Ego Wodem]

It's beautiful.

[Billy Eichner]

I love modern. And I do love. I love watching dance, actually. And I've seen, like, Justin Peck's shows in New York, and I have major respect for dancers because I can't do it. They're so hot. To me, they have the most beautiful bodies, but I was just never great at that. You know, Tap looks fun.

[Ego Wodem]

Tap does sound fun.

[Billy Eichner]

And because you're not, like, in tap, you're not, like, flying across the room doesn't require that same type of, like, ballet, like, grace. Exactly. I don't know what I'm talking about.

[Ego Wodem]

You're like, I don't want to get canceled.

[Billy Eichner]

I don't want to get canceled. But it feels a little more like you can stand in one place and just like, you know, that looks fun to me and maybe a little more manageable.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. Okay. I mean, I think that's fair. I did some tap dancing dancing classes when I was younger, and I'm like, there's something very. There's something very fun. Very fun.

[Billy Eichner]

It feels very. And you're like, stomping. Out aggression. Support for the show comes from Public, the investing platform for those who take it seriously. On Public you can build a multi asset portfolio of stocks, bonds, options, crypto and now generated assets which allow you to turn any idea into an investable index with AI. It all starts with your prompt. From renewable energy companies with high free cash flow to semiconductor suppliers growing revenue over 20% year over year, you can literally type any prompt and put the AI to work. It screens thousands of stocks, builds a one of a kind index and lets you back test it against the S&P 500. Then you can invest in a few clicks. Generated assets are like ETFs with infinite possibilities, completely customizable and based on your thesis, not someone else's. Go to public.com podcast and earn an uncapped 1% bonus when you transfer your portfolio. That's public.com podcast paid for by Public Investing Brokerage Services by Open to the Public Investing Inc. Member FINRA and SIPC Advisory services by Public Advisors llc. SEC Registered Advisor Generated Assets is an interactive analysis tool. Output is for informational purposes only and is not an investment recommendation or advice. Complete disclosures [e-mail] Disclosures hey everyone, it's Cal Penn. I'm the host of Irsay The Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club. This week on the podcast I am sitting down with Ray Porter, the narrator of Andy Weir's audiobook project, Hail Mary Massive sci fi adventure about survival and

[Ego Wodem]

science and what happens when you wake up alone, very far from Earth.

[Billy Eichner]

I really had to make a decision because I caught myself getting that frog in my throat and starting to get teary as I'm narrating some of these sections and it's like, okay, yo yo yo, is this indulgent? And I really thought about it. I was like, no. At this point it would kind of be betraying the trust the the author and the listener have in telling this story if I don't go through it. But there's places in this book that that deeply, emotionally affected me and I left it on the mic. That's great because it served the story. People will say like oh my God, I cried at the end. It's like, yeah dude, me too. Listen to Irsay the Audible and iHeart

[Ego Wodem]

audiobook club on the iHeartradio app or

[Billy Eichner]

wherever you get your podcasts. Ryan Reynolds here from ITM with a message for everyone paying Big Wireless way too much. Please, for the love of everything good in this world, stop with mint. You can get premium wireless for just $15 a month. Of course, if you enjoy overpaying, no judgments. But that's weird. Okay, one judgment anyway. Give it a [e-mail] Switch upfront payment

[Ego Wodem]

of $45 for 3 month plan equivalent to $15 per month required intro rate first 3 months only, then full price plan options available, taxes and fees extra. See full [e-mail] these days I hear about AI so often that I tend to tune most of it out. But I gotta say, WIX Harmony actually lives up to the hype. It's an AI website builder that lets you build any type of website with AI but still gives you the freedom to edit anything yourself. So you're not just stuck with whatever AI gives you. And you've got an AI agent named Aria that can help you out. Try it for [e-mail] Harmony that's wix.com Harmony. Do you have any guilty pleasures?

[Billy Eichner]

You know, I try not to feel guilty about the things that I like to watch. I'm sure I do like certain things that other people would say are guilty pleasures, but I'm like, why should I feel guilty about it?

[Ego Wodem]

I like that answer.

[Billy Eichner]

You know what I mean? What are your guilty pleasures?

[Ego Wodem]

I don't feel guilty about a damn thing. Somebody will tell me if I should.

[Billy Eichner]

Oftentimes the things, especially culturally that are guilty pleasures are things that women and gay men like.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh, yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

You know, it's always, oh, that's a guilty plea, you know, And I don't like that.

[Ego Wodem]

That's fair. Do you watch reality tv?

[Billy Eichner]

I'm not a big reality TV person. I'm not a person who thinks it ruined the world or anything. It's just not for me. I watched the only. Now what I did, like, I don't know, I liked reality competition when that first started, like the early seasons of American Idol and Project Runway. I loved as a teenager those early seasons of the Real World on mtv.

[Ego Wodem]

Still the best reality shows.

[Billy Eichner]

I was a some of the old Real World folks. Like, we follow each other on Instagram and I'm so starstruck. Judd and Pam.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

From San Francisco. Real World.

[Ego Wodem]

I mean, I think my gyna was on. Well, someone who was my gynecologist was on Real World.

[Billy Eichner]

Wow, that's exciting.

[Ego Wodem]

I know. Can you imagine her looking at my vagina? And I'm like, so tell me, what was it like living in the house with six other strangers?

[Billy Eichner]

I love that.

[Ego Wodem]

Big fan.

[Billy Eichner]

As an adult, I don't watch a lot of it, except sort of a sad but maybe interesting story. The Only full season of Real Housewives I've ever watched. And really some of the only Real Housewives episodes I've ever watched. And I watched the whole season. The first season of Beverly Hills coincided with the three months my dad was dying in the hospital. And it was all that I could wrap my head around, was the Real Housewives. I couldn't handle anything else because life was, like, so stressful and scary and sad. And I watched that whole season. Like, the new episodes would come on Wednesday nights, and I would really look. I would. All day, I'd be like, I just. I just cannot wait for the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Because I was going to the hospital every day and, you know, taking care of my dad. And then strangely, you know, sadly, my dad died, like, right as they aired the season finale. I watched it six months later, like, or whenever it was a year later, the new season comes out, and I didn't need it anymore. And I thought, nope, I'm not. I needed it during that very difficult time, and now I don't have any reason to watch it.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah, I'm done with it. It served its purpose.

[Billy Eichner]

It served its purpose, but I was grateful for it in the moment. And it also made me see maybe why people watch those shows. I don't know. People have a lot of anxiety and they need an escape, something that doesn't feel too heavy.

[Ego Wodem]

What do you watch that makes you. Not now, now that you've left the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills behind it? Season one.

[Billy Eichner]

Season one, a long time ago. 2011.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. What do you watch now when you're like, I want to escape?

[Billy Eichner]

Oh, I watch a lot of things. I've been watching the Comeback, the last season of the Comeback. Which genius. My favorite show of all time. I don't know if that's an escape. Yeah, it's very. It's very Hollywood and very Hollywood centric. This season especially, I thought, really caught kind of this strange, somewhat bleak time in Hollywood. I thought it really captured that mood.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

I don't know if that's what they were going for, but it kind of, with the AI of it all, like, that felt. I really could feel that. Yeah. What do I watch as an escape? I love a music documentary because I'm not in music, so it allows me to, like, watch a story about entertainment, but that I don't feel like, triggered by. I just watch now if you want hip and cool. I just watched the Counting Crows documentary.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

Do you even know who that band is?

[Ego Wodem]

I'm too young to know I do know the Counting Crows.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah, they're a big band in the 90s. When I was in college, I just watched the Counting Crows documentary. I love a music documentary. What else do I watch? All kinds of things. You know, it's a comfort watch for me and I talk about this in my book, Gilmore Girl.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah, I remember Gilmore. That's right.

[Billy Eichner]

I didn't watch it the first time around.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

I was like in my early 20s, I was going out all the time. I didn't need Gilmore Girls. Now as a 47 year old man, I'm a Gilmore. Middle aged man is what I am. You know, once in a while, like I'll get under the covers and watch the Gilmore Girls and I'm not gonna feel ashamed about that.

[Ego Wodem]

How many seasons deep are you?

[Billy Eichner]

They have so many seasons.

[Ego Wodem]

That's what I understood.

[Billy Eichner]

Gilmore Girls, that's like old school TV where they made like 26 episodes, hour long episodes, and it's like, like 8, 10, 12 seasons. And they brought it back. I'm not done. Yeah, I'm nowhere near done. Oh, the girl's only going to Yale or wherever she's going. Rory Gilmore. Anyway, but I love it. It's very. It's a comfort watch.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh, that's good to know. I might have to pick it up.

[Billy Eichner]

It's time for you to discover Gilmore Girls.

[Ego Wodem]

I'm gonna discover Gilmore Girls because I remember it being on TV when I was like in elementary or middle school or something, but I think I was like, I was watching 7th Heaven.

[Billy Eichner]

Oh, I was kind of in the same.

[Ego Wodem]

It was in the same vibe. It was Dawson's Creek around the same time as well.

[Billy Eichner]

Yes, I think so. Gilmore girls is like 2000. It debuts or something like that.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay, good to know. I'm gonna get into it.

[Billy Eichner]

Lauren Graham, you know, she's. I really, I really enjoy her.

[Ego Wodem]

I do too. Did you watch her in Parenthood?

[Billy Eichner]

I loved that show.

[Ego Wodem]

Me too.

[Billy Eichner]

That is such an underrated show. I loved Parenthood and I've told Lauren Graham as much. Yeah, I'll have you know, Parenthood. If you haven't seen Parent, you know, that's. That'd be a good rewatch. Yeah, I love that show. It's a beautiful show.

[Ego Wodem]

It's time. I've time. Do you do the movies a lot as well? Do you go to.

[Billy Eichner]

Yes. Movies were a huge part of my childhood. I would go to the movies with my parents every Saturday night, literally religiously. It's like what bonded us as a family. Even if there was nothing we Wanted to see. We would just pick something and go. I don't go to the movies as much anymore. I don't think anyone does.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah, yeah, it's.

[Billy Eichner]

But I love. I still love the movies, but I find myself watching random movies. Like, I'll watch. Something will pop in my head and I'll say, oh, I want to watch that. And it's nothing anyone else is watching currently, but you can watch any movie at any time. So I just watch random things.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah, that is a thing. Do you have a bunch of the streaming subscriptions or are you like, I have everything. You have everything.

[Billy Eichner]

I don't use everything, but I have it.

[Ego Wodem]

Isn't that messed up? Because I also have things where I'm like, oh, I need to get Paramount plus to watch this show. And then I'll discover I already have Paramount Plus.

[Billy Eichner]

Totally. And I. Yeah. I never remember the password if I need it, but I have everything. It's. It's strange. Like things were supposed to be simplified, I don't know.

[Ego Wodem]

And then somehow got complicated. How do you take care of yourself besides, like, comfort watches in this day and age where everything's a little kooky?

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

Right.

[Billy Eichner]

How do I take care of myself? I listen to a lot of music. I have music on constantly, like from the second I get up, going to bed. I really love music that calms me down. I just love. Part of the reason I moved back to New York is that I really missed just being able to walk around and to be around other people without having to talk to them, but you know, they're there. You know, that's very New York. It's like, I need that. I need to be able to just leave my apartment and not when I shooting Billy on the street or shouting at people, just like when I have my AirPods in and I can just walk around. Everyone in New York does that. Everyone has this, like, main character energy. But it's very Zen to me because I don't want to. I would walk around la. That's the creepiest thing.

[Ego Wodem]

It's very weird. And also people are looking at you like, what's going on?

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah. What's wrong with you? Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

And I would try to kind of recreate that New York feeling in la, but you can't.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

The weather's perfect, but there's literally like no one around.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

And it would creep me out. And I need people. I have that New York thing where, like, I don't necessarily want to know who my neighbors are, but I want to know they're there.

[Ego Wodem]

Right. Okay. Fair. Are you extroverted or introverted, would you say? Obviously, we know Billy.

[Billy Eichner]

On the street, in my work, I'm very extroverted. I think I'm just kind of normal. I can be shy.

[Ego Wodem]

I'm normal.

[Billy Eichner]

I can be shy. Like, if I know if I'm around my friends, I'm not shy. If I'm around new people, it can take me a minute to warm up. Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. Have you always been like that?

[Billy Eichner]

Yes. And I've gotten less so, I think, in a way, especially if I'm in certain, like, gay spaces or something. Like, I know that people will recognize me, and I know everyone's like, oh, is that weird? For me, it's like an icebreaker. I don't have to explain myself.

[Ego Wodem]

Right.

[Billy Eichner]

You know, even if they don't really know who I am as a real person, it's like that actually undercuts some of the awkwardness for me. When I was in my 20s, I was like, my best friend of 30 years, since high school, still. My best friend Heath, he's gay, too. And he was always the life of the party in our 20s. Right. And he's gorgeous and very, very friendly. And I was like, his quirky, quiet, like, nerdier friend, like, standing beside him. I've gotten. I'm not like that anymore. I'm more extroverted now. But in my 20s, when I was younger, I was definitely quieter.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. And how did you and Heath, like, how did you guys bond? What was the bond about?

[Billy Eichner]

We met on the speech and debate team in high school.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

And I went to a. Strangely. I went to a high school in Manhattan called Stuyvesant.

[Ego Wodem]

I know Stuyvesant. I went to college with a girl who went to Stuyvesant.

[Billy Eichner]

So it's a public school, but you have to take a test to get it in, like, an SAT like test. And it's really math and science focused. To this day, I have no idea how I got in. I was not a math and science student. I'm guessing my English scores carried me. But at Stuyvesant, there weren't that many opportunities to perform. Right. It was a more of an academic environment. So the speech team. Speech team is a very cultish thing where you, like, perform scenes from plays, but with all kinds of weird formal rules, and it's hard to describe. Josh Gad, I think, just made a documentary about speech team, which is. Which explains it. But. But it was one of my only outlets to perform. And Heath was on that team too. And we just bonded. We didn't know each other were gay. I. I always thought it was very obvious that I was gay. I like musicals. I started the musicals. I was, you know, being funny, and I like to perform, and I just thought, based on my interests, people knew I was gay. My parents certainly knew. I did not know Heath was gay at all.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

And then. So we were best friends. We never talked about it. You know, he would, like, kind of pretend to date girls, and I was just kind of being, like, asexual. And Stuyvesant was a great place to be in the closet in high school in the mid-90s, because very few of the kids were sleeping together, even the straight kids, because everyone was so focused on school.

[Ego Wodem]

Math and science.

[Billy Eichner]

Exactly. Like what college you were gonna get into.

[Ego Wodem]

Wow.

[Billy Eichner]

Right. In that way. It was a great master, in a way, for being gay. No one was like, where's your girlfriend? You know, no one had girl. Very few people had girlfriends.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

So then Heath and I had, you know, I'll give you the PG rated version of this. So we had.

[Ego Wodem]

This is.

[Billy Eichner]

You can call it great. All right.

[Ego Wodem]

It's a podcast.

[Billy Eichner]

Exactly. Well, now that we're in the heated rivalry era, it's all up for grabs.

[Ego Wodem]

Anything's possible here.

[Billy Eichner]

We were not. We did not play hockey, but we were on the debate team.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

Just as hot.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

And we graduated from high school the end of June, 1996. And so 30 years ago, like, right around this time, I keep telling Heath, like, It's our 30th anniversary. A week later, July 4th weekend, 1996, he invited me to his parents country house in Pennsylvania. I said, okay, innocently enough. And we went to his country house, hanging out like everything was normal. His parents go to bed one night. He's gonna die that I'm telling this story.

[Ego Wodem]

Ooh, sorry, Heath.

[Billy Eichner]

He's the best. And we were not, like, boys who wrestled around, you know, we were not like jocks like, that. We didn't. We were gay. We didn't have that type of, like, aggressive nature at that point.

[Ego Wodem]

Right.

[Billy Eichner]

But one thing led to another. We were watching tv and he kind of threw something at me, and then I threw it back. And then all of a sudden, I cannot believe I'm telling this story. It's not even in my book. We were, like, on top of each other. And I could tell very quickly that, like, Heath is gay.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh.

[Billy Eichner]

And I could not believe it. I was shocked.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

And that became. So we were each other's first gay hookup. Like, we came out to each other in that moment and hooked up in that moment. Then it's a long story. Like, he didn't really want to be gay. And I was like, we're gay. I was so happy. I was, like, so ready.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh, yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

And I was like, I know. I'm. I had already gotten into college. I knew I was going to Northwestern to study theater. Musical theater. In my head, I had the whole plan. I was like, all the guys are gonna be gay. I'm gonna come out. It's gonna be great.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

Heath was not. He was, like, about to be a frat boy, you know, at Cornell, and he didn't want to be gay at that point. So he kind of went back in the closet, and we kind of stopped talking to each other. And then he called me senior year when I was in college, and he said, you know, I miss you. I'm starting to come out of the closet, and I want to be friends again. He came out to Chicago to visit me. We went to gay bars, and we've been best friends ever since.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh, my goodness. That's a good story.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah, he's the best. He's like my brother.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh, that's incredible.

[Billy Eichner]

Brothers who once hooked up one time. What's hotter than that?

[Ego Wodem]

That's fine. Sometimes it be like that.

[Billy Eichner]

Exactly. You're gonna win a GLAAD Award for this episode.

[Ego Wodem]

Thank you.

[Billy Eichner]

I've been gunning for a while our industry's highest honor.

[Ego Wodem]

Yes. I love.

[Billy Eichner]

I'm glad. I'm kidding. I have a GLAAD Award.

[Ego Wodem]

I'm very grateful you have to cover all your basics there, Bill. Are you. Am I allowed to ask if you're dating?

[Billy Eichner]

I am single. I date.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

I'm single right now.

[Ego Wodem]

You're single?

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

Do you want to get married one day?

[Billy Eichner]

Married? I would be in a relationship married if the person I was with felt if that was important to them. I'm not against it, but I'm not like, oh, God, I can't wait to get married.

[Ego Wodem]

It's not a thing that matters to you. Yeah, I get that. Also, I'm seeing this trend now, too, where I'm like, all the friends of mine who are engaged, which is many of them, and even friends in the last few years have been engaged. People are being, like, cool to stay engaged and be like, we just live in engagement. And also being like, we're not having some grand wedding. We're going to the courthouse. It's like, the vibe right now.

[Billy Eichner]

I know. I like that vibe.

[Ego Wodem]

Me, too.

[Billy Eichner]

I Also, like, just staying engaged forever. Imagine just being engaged. Sexy.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. The tension, like, we'll do it one day maybe.

[Billy Eichner]

It's like, very Goldie Hawn, Kurt Russell. And it works.

[Ego Wodem]

It does work.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

What do you think that is, though? That makes, like, yes, it's sexy. It's enticing. But, like, what do you think that is? That makes a couple that goes, we don't want to get married, or we're just gonna stay. Like, we're not even gonna get engaged. Cause I know some couples like that as well, who've just been together forever and they're doing the whole thing.

[Billy Eichner]

Why does that work?

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah, why do you think that works? I'm like, you know.

[Billy Eichner]

Cause it doesn't feel like you're locking yourself up.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

You know, it feels more free. It feels more liberated. The pressure isn't there. The minute there's pressure there. Too much pressure. Yeah. It keeps you locked in on the one hand, but also, I think it starts to feel a little less fun.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. Do you feel that way about titles, too, by chance? Like, being, like, going, we're official. We're defining the relationship and stuff? Do you feel that way about that, dating?

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah. I mean, I don't really. I don't know if I feel strongly about that one way or the other. Like, we're official. I mean, I guess if you're dating, you want to know, like, okay, we're dating. Because in the gay world, I mean, even when you're dating, there's, like, always, like, other guys. I mean, you know, the gays. It's like, I can't keep up, you know? But so it's nice to have a little stability.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

We just don't need all the old school rules necessarily.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. Fair enough. Do you want kids?

[Billy Eichner]

I do not have a burning desire for children, and I don't. I think if you don't have a burning desire, you probably shouldn't and have kids. However, let me just put this asterisk on it in case one day this all blows up in my face.

[Ego Wodem]

It should not. I don't want anything anyone says on here ever blowing up. That's my desire, by the way. I just want to say.

[Billy Eichner]

And rare. That's very commendable.

[Ego Wodem]

I'm like, yeah. I'm like, come, let's have. Let's have a conversation.

[Billy Eichner]

I agree with that.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

I'm like, whenever people. Celebrities did Billy on the street, if there was something that they. That just kind of fell out of their mouths, like, and they didn't want it on the air, I'd be like, yeah, we're cutting it. You came and did my show.

[Ego Wodem]

What an honor that you're in this

[Billy Eichner]

clickbaity world where people feel like they need it. Your asterisk, but my asterisk on having kids again. If I was with someone and we were in love, and I felt like we were in it for the long haul, and it was very important to them to have a kid, I could have a kid. I am not, like, dead set against it, and part of me thinks it would be fun. I'm not one of those people who's gonna have a child by themselves if I never meet the one that's not happening.

[Ego Wodem]

Right. Okay, fair.

[Billy Eichner]

I'll travel and have a good time.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. Instead.

[Billy Eichner]

Exactly.

[Ego Wodem]

Where. Where do you normally like to travel to? Are there. Are you, like, a, like, beach person, a city person?

[Billy Eichner]

Well, obviously, I like the beach to be in the near vicinity, but I'm a little too restless, and I get a little too hot to sit on the beach all day long.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

I like the beach. For now, I'm more of a, like, sit in the pool with a drink type of person. Where do I like to travel? I'm a little bit under travel. There's a lot of places I haven't been that I want to go. It's a little embarrassing. We didn't travel a lot when I was a kid. Like, they didn't. My parents didn't have a ton of money, so what? We spent our money on things in New York that didn't require getting on a plane. And so. And then when I got older and I finally had money, I didn't have time.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

So now I'm trying to, like, make time till. I've never been to Japan. Everyone's like, oh, my God. Japan is, like, the greatest. I need to go. I know. I need to go to Japan. You say, I know. I heard. I know the Japanese are very excited.

[Ego Wodem]

Waiting for Billy to get you.

[Billy Eichner]

I know. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. So I want to go to Japan. I've never been to Berlin. You know, things that I should. Places I should go.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

But I love Paris very much. Probably my second favorite city. And I like all the gay places in terms of all the, like, the popular gay resort spots. I'm a Provincetown, Massachusetts, gay. I love P Town very much. It's a magical place. And I, you know, I do Fire island and all the things.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. Are you. How are you with group travel?

[Billy Eichner]

I like a group. I don't need 20 people. That's a lot.

[Ego Wodem]

Where are we capping it? Where would you.

[Billy Eichner]

I think four to six is a good number. Even three can. A three that you really like. That's good.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

If one person wants to, like, not do something, you still have a person to do something.

[Ego Wodem]

Something with. Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

I also don't mind traveling alone.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

Not for, like, an extended period of time, but, like, you know, I've gone to London by myself. That's actually kind of fun.

[Ego Wodem]

I want to try that. I do try. I try. I went to Barcelona by myself not too long ago, and I'm like. I also do enjoy a solo.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

Travel.

[Billy Eichner]

It's nice.

[Ego Wodem]

I'm sleeping when I want to, for how long I want to. Eating where I want.

[Billy Eichner]

No pressure.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah, it is very nice. But I get that you would also appreciate it as an only child, getting to do your thing.

[Billy Eichner]

Oh, you're right. I'm used to having my space and getting my way.

[Ego Wodem]

What are you in a relationship? An avoidant or an anxiously attached person?

[Billy Eichner]

Okay, everyone's talking about these terms keep popping up.

[Ego Wodem]

Or maximizer, minimizer.

[Billy Eichner]

Oh, I don't know what these things are. Relationship avoidant versus what?

[Ego Wodem]

Anxiously attached. So avoidant or an anxiously attached person. So that's two attachment styles. Or you can be securely attached.

[Billy Eichner]

That sounds nice. Can I be securely attached?

[Ego Wodem]

Are you.

[Billy Eichner]

I'm not attached to anyone.

[Ego Wodem]

But, like, when you get in a relationship or things start to get romantic with someone, do you get.

[Billy Eichner]

Do I freak out?

[Ego Wodem]

Do you freak out and get avoided in a little standoffish and get cold feet? Or are you like, I need answers. We should hang out, or are you like, whatever.

[Billy Eichner]

I think if you're feeling that anxiety, it might not be meant to be. I have felt that anxiety the minute you're my heath and I always say to each other, we have an expression. The minute you feel a need to check in, it's over. If you have to check in, it's over.

[Ego Wodem]

This is your official stance.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah, my official stance. Maybe you check in once. All right, the person's busy. If they have a certain kind of thing going on in their lives where they're, like, really busy or fine at their job or whatever. But if you find yourself needing to check in where you want to write a text, that's just like, he's not getting back to me, just checking in, that's over. They are not into you. Save your time. And it's so hard in the moment because you want to make excuses. Excuses. If you like the person. If you have to check in too Much. Goodbye. Go meet someone that actually wants to text you back.

[Ego Wodem]

So if you get the. If you feel the urge to check in. Billy. Right. Do you go, fuck it, it's done. If I'm having the urge to check in, I'm not doing it. Or are you going, I will check in this once. What happens?

[Billy Eichner]

Usually that. But as I've gotten older, I've tried to limit that. Sometimes you got to give the person the benefit of the doubt. They're not always available when you are. But you always. I had this with a guy recently. You know, you always know. You get that feeling in your gut. Mmm. He could have gotten back to me by now. Even if he does eventually get back to you, if it took too long,

[Ego Wodem]

it's a little funny.

[Billy Eichner]

He's looking for other options.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh, yeah. And so then you kind of just go, all right, I know what this is.

[Billy Eichner]

In a moment of weakness, you might say, ugh, he's so hot. I'll just check in. But even then, you know, like, it's not meant to be. And almost always that gut feeling is right.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. Yeah. It's true. I will say when you. It's. It is a hard one, that. In the moment, especially if you have chemistry when you are together. Yeah. And it's a good time. Damn, that stuff is hard. How do you deal with not liking, like, a really good friend's partner or the person that they're dating, even?

[Billy Eichner]

Luckily, that hasn't happened a lot. Yeah. It's tough when that happens. What do you do? You just kind of have to hang out with the person without the partner around.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

You know?

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah, I'm like, okay, I don't have that. I'm just like, yeah, I don't really

[Billy Eichner]

have that right now.

[Ego Wodem]

I'm imagining a friend in a situation where they're having to check in with someone, and you're kind of like, it's bad news.

[Billy Eichner]

It would be a nightmare for me, like, if Heath had a serious boyfriend who I didn't like. That would be very hard.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Billy Eichner]

If he was in love with him and the guy, like, was treating him okay, I would be like, oh, yeah, he's. He's great. Like, go do your thing. I mean, what are you gonna say?

[Ego Wodem]

You're a good actor, but for as

[Billy Eichner]

good as your acting is, I didn't

[Ego Wodem]

buy that at all.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah. But luckily, that's never happened. But that's a tricky one.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. Would you tell a friend, though, and straight up be, like, with a bad partner? Not the bad partner, but, like, he's not that into you.

[Billy Eichner]

If the person started to complain about the partner and say, I don't, you know, ask questions like, what do you think about his behavior? Like, if they brought it up with me.

[Ego Wodem]

Got it.

[Billy Eichner]

Then I would find a gentle way to be honest because I, I don't. If I love my friend, I don't want them to be with this fucking weirdo, like, asshole. So I would find a way if they brought up some skepticism about the relationship to me, but I wouldn't be like, not just want to tell you your boyfriend sucks. Have a great day. No, no, no, you can't do that. They have to realize it on their own.

[Ego Wodem]

Right. Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

Unless the person's like, you know, abusive or something.

[Ego Wodem]

And then you gotta get in there and we need to be proactive. Yeah, we gotta get in there and get them out of there. Oh, wait, Billy, I want to play a game with you.

[Billy Eichner]

Let's do it.

[Ego Wodem]

We're trying a new thing around here. It's called dad, Daddy, Father. This is our version of Fuck, Marry, kill. You've heard of it?

[Billy Eichner]

I have.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay, we've got three guys for you

[Billy Eichner]

and we want to know dad, Daddy, Father.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. Which we should maybe move around. So if it's. We should. We'll do this in real time here with you. So fuck, marry, kill. It should perhaps be daddy, father. No. Do we want to kill the father or the dad?

[Billy Eichner]

Well, yeah. I need to know what the rules are.

[Ego Wodem]

Well, I mean, help me.

[Billy Eichner]

Do I want to fuck the daddy?

[Ego Wodem]

Of course we want to fuck the daddy.

[Billy Eichner]

And I probably going to want to fuck the dad too. We're being real.

[Ego Wodem]

So ours is.

[Billy Eichner]

I don't know if I heart rated or anything.

[Ego Wodem]

Ours is Fuck, fuck, kill.

[Billy Eichner]

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck is the gay version. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

[Ego Wodem]

You're like, I'll fuck the daddy. I'll fuck the dad. And I'll fuck the father.

[Billy Eichner]

Exactly. And their neighbor.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah. And their hot uncle. Their childless neighbor, Hot ripped uncle on Peptides.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay, so everybody's getting fucked, but we'll see.

[Billy Eichner]

Okay. Yeah. So the dad is like your friend.

[Ego Wodem]

You know what? Yes, I like that.

[Billy Eichner]

And daddy is who you want to have sex with and father is.

[Ego Wodem]

Get him out of here.

[Billy Eichner]

We're gonna kill the father.

[Ego Wodem]

I know that feels wrong.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah. You want killing any of them? Feel maybe you don't kill anyone. Maybe father is who, like you don't

[Ego Wodem]

want anything to do with. Like it's like a priest where it's like. Well, that's not saying I want anything to do with priest. But, like, they're in another room.

[Billy Eichner]

Father. Father is like, yeah, I want space from father.

[Ego Wodem]

Can you believe they gave me a podcast? Honestly, think about it.

[Billy Eichner]

Thinking about everyone who has podcasts now, it's not that much of a surprise. I think you're doing great, by the way. And I think it's very inclusive to have a game where you literally just fuck everyone.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. Everyone's getting fucked in this one.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah. I mean, at this point, I. You know, there are a lot of dads and daddies that I would probably fuck.

[Ego Wodem]

So then we're not gonna kill the father. Do we just. Is it like fuck, fuck. I think go in the other room.

[Billy Eichner]

I think it's. I think it's fuck. Fuck. Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck. Hold on.

[Ego Wodem]

I have annoyed. Maybe it's. Maybe it's. Maybe it's fuck.

[Billy Eichner]

Mm.

[Ego Wodem]

Make love to be friends with.

[Billy Eichner]

Oh, that's nice.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. Okay, so I'll write it down.

[Billy Eichner]

Fuck, make love to be friends with.

[Ego Wodem]

Be friends with.

[Billy Eichner]

Okay.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. All right, so it's dad, Daddy, father, fuck. So.

[Billy Eichner]

But I'm gonna. Dad is fuck.

[Ego Wodem]

Fuck. Make love to dad. So dad, I would say daddy. Daddy is fucking.

[Billy Eichner]

Daddy's fuck. Yes.

[Ego Wodem]

Daddy's fuck.

[Billy Eichner]

We're all stuck. You always want to fuck the daddy.

[Ego Wodem]

You always want to fuck the daddy.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah, dad, you won't hear this on Amy Poehler's podcast, I'll tell you that.

[Ego Wodem]

If you thought that's what was going on over here.

[Billy Eichner]

We're playing. She's like, you know, having a lovely conversation with Adam Scott, and we're like, I'm gonna fuck the dad. I'm gonna fuck daddy, too. I'm gonna blow father. He didn't even consider dad's uncle's ass. Okay, okay, okay, Wait, wait, wait.

[Ego Wodem]

Daddy. Daddy is fuck. Dad is make love to and father is be friends with.

[Billy Eichner]

Okay.

[Ego Wodem]

F is for friends.

[Billy Eichner]

F is for friends.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

Dad is be friends with.

[Ego Wodem]

No, dad is dad. Dad is make love.

[Billy Eichner]

Oh, Dads make love.

[Ego Wodem]

And daddy is fuck making love. Daddy is, like, rough.

[Billy Eichner]

This sells a lot of audiobooks for me.

[Ego Wodem]

All right.

[Billy Eichner]

Making love to dad. Daddy is fuck. Yes. And then father is be friends. Okay.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. Thank you. Thank you for helping me sort that. I hope somebody wrote it down. I don't have the writing implement. Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

I think I got it.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. Okay. But I mean for later, because you helped me crack the case here today for the future as well. Okay. Has tattoos that were. Has tattoos that are the names of his exes. Okay. So I'm going To read all three. Has never flossed and stands outside of the theater putting on shows himself. Has tattoos that are the names of his exes. You don't want to fuck anybody now, do you? Has never flossed and stands outside of the theater putting on shows of his own.

[Billy Eichner]

Well, I'll fuck the guy with tattoos,

[Ego Wodem]

even if it's the names of the exes. Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

The other guy doesn't floss.

[Ego Wodem]

You can't fuck someone who doesn't floss.

[Billy Eichner]

Well, I'd rather not.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

I'm sure I have.

[Ego Wodem]

So where does the person who doesn't floss.

[Billy Eichner]

I like tattoos, so I'll fuck the guy with tattoos.

[Ego Wodem]

That's daddy. So that's daddy.

[Billy Eichner]

That's Daddy. The guy who puts on shows. It's a little sad, but that's sweet. Okay, that'll be father.

[Ego Wodem]

Father. You'll be friends.

[Billy Eichner]

And then I'm making. Wait, no.

[Ego Wodem]

And then you're making love. No, no, no.

[Billy Eichner]

I'll make love to the guy who put shows.

[Ego Wodem]

So that's. So that's dad. The guy putting on shows outside of the theater is dad.

[Billy Eichner]

That's dad.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

And then daddy is the guy who has tattoos that are his exes.

[Billy Eichner]

And then father is the guy who doesn't floss. You'll be fine if I want to keep my distance.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah, that's fair enough.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah. But the guy who puts on shows. What kinds of shows? Like, some. A show could be hot if he's, like. Has, like, an acoustic guitar and is, like, singing nice. Like, fun.

[Ego Wodem]

We have it specified. Do you want to amend your answer or do you want to.

[Billy Eichner]

I would like to know more about the guy who puts on shows.

[Ego Wodem]

Well, that's why you could be a father.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah, you get to talk to him.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

All right.

[Ego Wodem]

So. Oh, no. Father is the flossing. Anyway, you're good. The guy who puts on shows. You're going to make love, too. Okay? And you guys, you'll get to know him. Get to know him because you're making love. Okay, now it's time for a segment I'm calling Thank U. Next. Okay, this is where our previous guest has a question for you. And you'll get to ask our next guest a question. So Frankie Grande, who was our previous guest, asked, what's your favorite Celine Dion song?

[Billy Eichner]

Oh, I just saw Titanique.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

With Frankie Grande, and a lot of my friends are in that show. It's really, really funny. My favorite Celine Dion song. Ah, this is hard. I should pick a single. There are deep cuts That I could mention.

[Ego Wodem]

I mean, if they're faves, I think you should pop off.

[Billy Eichner]

Sometimes the deep cuts are nice because they're not as like over played. But let me mention one that people know. I actually really do like Taking Chances.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Billy Eichner]

Which they sing in the show and I like. Oh, you just said one, you're one.

[Ego Wodem]

So you're going with taking chances.

[Billy Eichner]

I'll go with taking chances.

[Ego Wodem]

Taking Chances. Good answer.

[Billy Eichner]

Thank you.

[Ego Wodem]

I'm not gonna listen to it now. Billy, what question do you want to ask our next guest?

[Billy Eichner]

Oh, okay. What is your least favorite Celine Dion song?

[Ego Wodem]

The new logo for this podcast. Take my favorite face Off. Let's get Seline on. I hope I can get. I hope I can book Seline next. That would be great.

[Billy Eichner]

She'd be great.

[Ego Wodem]

That would be great.

[Billy Eichner]

I can't wait for her to play dad. Daddy. My father.

[Ego Wodem]

But you helped us sort it out.

[Billy Eichner]

Yeah, she did marry an older man, so there might be.

[Ego Wodem]

I'm just saying I think she'll have fun. Thank you so much for doing this today. Thank you for having me. Of course. That was my conversation with Billy Eichner. I hope you enjoyed and I will see you on the next episode. I love you, I need you, I want ya. Also, the beach is free and that piece of advice from me is free. A lot of shit is free. I dare you comment wherever. What else is free? Give us ideas of free shit to do because people ain't trying to spend much. Okay. That was free too. Thinkstad is a production of Will Ferrell's Big Money players and iHeart podcasts. I'm your host, Ego Wodem. Our producer is Kevin Bartelt and our executive producer is Matt Apodaca. This is Sophia Donner from OK Storytime this summer. Find your next obsession on Prime Video and listen. We're not saying you need another obsession, but there could be a lot worse ones. Steamy romance, addictive love stories and the book to screen favorites you've already read twice. So why not watch them a third time off campus? Elle, the Love Hypothesis and more Slow burns. Second chances chemistry you can feel through the screen and it makes you wish you were actually in that movie. We've got binge worthy series. Can't miss movies. Perfect for when you're ignoring your own problems or procrastinating as one does. Your next obsession is waiting. Watch only on prime. M&Ms.

[Billy Eichner]

Popped caramel do sound different.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh no.

[Billy Eichner]

People are gonna be obsessed. What do you mean? People hate the sound of chewing. Maybe they won't like the crunch. Maybe we're saved.

[Ego Wodem]

Wait a minute. Yellow.

[Billy Eichner]

Have you been eating them this whole time? Mmm.

[Ego Wodem]

So tasty.

[Billy Eichner]

Hands off us. M&M's popped caramel. It's more fun together.

[Ego Wodem]

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