Ron Funches

Summary

Thanks Dad with Ego Nwodim – Episode Summary

Guest: Ron Funches
Date: November 18, 2025

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Episode Overview

In this heartfelt, hilarious, and candid conversation, Ego Nwodim sits down with comedian and actor Ron Funches to discuss fatherhood, gratitude, resilience, family dynamics, and personal growth. Ron reflects on his own upbringing, experiences as a dad of two boys (one of whom is on the autism spectrum), overcoming major life challenges like divorce, and how his relationship with his mother and absent father shaped his perspective. The two also riff on ice cream preferences, cake vs. pie, and why leadership (and knowing when to fire someone) is more complex than it looks. Expect vulnerability, wisdom, and plenty of trademark Ego and Ron irreverence.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Gratitude & Support Networks ([14:20])

• Ron’s Gratitude List: Ron shares his appreciation for his friends and work circle, especially for stepping up when he injured his back before a big show.

  “It was just nice to be like, oh, I don’t have to carry everything on my own.” – Ron Funches [15:22]

• Thankfulness for Family: He’s grateful for quality time and adult conversations with his mother (“learning more from her now as an adult than I did as a kid”).

2. Navigating Challenging Times & Values ([16:24], [19:02])

• Living Through Hard Social Times: Ron acknowledges the heartbreak and chaos in the wider world (e.g., ICE raids), appreciating how these circumstances clarify who shares his values:

  “It really indicates and lets me know, like, who is following on the same path that I’m trying to go on, who I should spend more time with…” – Ron Funches [17:08]

• Speaking Up: He encourages not staying silent in the face of injustice, even if it costs you followers or popularity.

  “What’s the point if you’re gonna lose? Lose swinging is what I would say.” – Ron Funches [19:52]

3. Learning from His Mother ([21:04])

• Perspective on Tough Times: Ron recounts how, during a painful divorce, his mother offered grounding perspective:

  “She just looks at me and she goes, I had breast cancer longer than that.” – Ron Funches [23:01]

• Her Many Roles: His mother’s resilience (surviving abuse, cancer, working in a prison, social work) guides her strength-based, survivor’s outlook.

4. Father Relationships & Family Dynamics ([25:11])

• The Absent Father: Ron’s dad was mostly absent but came through in a critical moment—when Ron’s mother, escaping an abusive relationship, moved Ron and his sister to live with their dad in Oregon:

  “He wasn’t there for most of the time that I needed him. He was there for me in a time where I needed him the most.” – Ron Funches [25:50–26:03]

• Impact on Identity: That move helped Ron discover his individuality, sense of humor, and eventually, his path as a comedian.

5. Parenting Two Sons—Different Needs, Same Empathy ([30:42])

• Value Emphasis: Ron strives to instill empathy, hard work, and collective responsibility.
• Parenting a Child on the Spectrum: Shares practical and emotional concerns for his older son, Malcolm—his safety as a large Black young man with autism, social situations, and long-term support:

  “I worry about his interactions with police. … When someone doesn’t get him and then they’re, like, aggressive about it.” – Ron Funches [33:00]

6. Divorce and Rediscovering Himself ([42:52])

• Personal Growth Through Pain: Ron describes the end of his second marriage as the worst experience of his life but ultimately transformative.

  “It was the worst thing I’ve been through in my life. That turned out to be, like, the biggest blessing for me.” – Ron Funches [42:52]

• Reclaiming Joy: Divorce forced him to rediscover his identity, recommit to what he loved (comedy, jiu-jitsu, Pilates), and set firmer boundaries.

7. Dating, Fatherhood, and Openness ([49:03])

• Being a Transparent Dad: Ron is upfront about his kids in dating and waits about six months before a new partner meets them.

  “To not be connected to them would be the worst thing in my life, because I would feel like I had a disconnection from myself.” – Ron Funches [50:30]

• Single Dad Appeal: Ego and Ron joke about the erotic cachet of being a caring, involved father.

8. Financial Literacy and "Real Dad Stuff" ([52:19])

• Allowance: Ron is generous (“Can I have a hundred dollars? … I just give it to him”) but admits he hasn’t taught much about saving yet, outside of trust planning.
• Providing More Than He Received: Ron’s goal as a dad is to provide what he lacked growing up—including financial security and present parenting.

9. Leadership & Firing People ([59:11])

• Management Philosophy: Ron learned reluctantly to embrace inspiring others: “Leaders aren’t necessarily born. You grow into it.”
• Trust and Boundaries: He focuses on hiring self-motivated people, trusting them, and has learned not to shy from making tough calls (even asking his manager to fire a misfit assistant who uploaded a parakeet video to his Instagram! [62:21]).

10. Music, Food—and Debates with Ego ([65:33], [66:22])

• Kendrick or Drake? Ron refuses the binary, instead framing Kendrick as music for “the bus ride” and Drake for “popcorn…movie theater” vibes.

  “They’re just two different modes… Kendrick’s a real bus ride… Drake is just popcorn.” – Ron Funches [65:58, 66:22]

• Desserts: The two debate cake vs. pie (Ron dismisses cake as “needy” while Ego defends it), with both agreeing donuts are overrated ([70:08–71:37]).

11. Listener Advice Segment ([67:32])

• Listener Asks: What to do when there’s no Haagen Dazs chocolate swirl vanilla available?
• Ron’s Take: “Step your game up… Try fish food, motherfucker. … Have you heard of Ben and Jerry’s?” ([68:17–68:46])
• Supporting Local: Advises supporting mom & pop ice cream shops and trying new flavors.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• On setting boundaries and authenticity:

  “If you’re gonna lose, lose swinging.” – Ron Funches [19:52]

• On his mother’s hard-won wisdom:

  “I had breast cancer longer than that.” – Ron Funches’s mom [23:01]

• On being a single dad and the appeal:

  “Either you’re gonna find a really good… grateful woman that is, like, good with kids, or you’re gonna get a lot of casual sex because you’re a good dad.” – Ron Funches [50:30]

• On cake vs. pie:

  “Cake to me is like, love me, love me, love me. I’m coming at you with sugar and icing and frosting. Love me so much. I’m cake. … Pie or a cobbler… on the inside is where delicious is.” – Ron Funches [70:39–71:14]

• On parenting and legacy:

  “If he comes to me as an adult later and he was in this type of relationship… the advice I would give him would be to leave. And if I can’t give him that advice, if I don’t follow it…” – Ron Funches [47:27]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• [14:20] – Ron’s gratitude (friends, family, this moment in history)
• [21:04] – Lessons from his mother
• [25:11] – Relationship with his father, moving to Oregon
• [30:42] – Raising sons with differing experiences (one on the spectrum)
• [42:52] – Divorce and personal growth
• [49:03] – Dating as a parent; threshold for meeting his children
• [52:19] – Providing for his kids, allowance, trust funds
• [59:11] – Leadership style, hiring, and firing stories
• [65:33] – Rapid-fire: Kendrick vs. Drake (Ron’s music taste)
• [67:32] – Listener Q&A (Ice Cream Emergency)
• [70:39] – Cake vs. pie, donuts, and more food philosophy

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Tone & Takeaways

The episode is a blend of comedic banter, vulnerable self-reflection, and practical wisdom, true to both Ego and Ron’s voices. Listeners get a window into the complexities of modern fatherhood, the nuances of being a supportive friend, the journey toward self-worth after heartbreak, and genuine gratitude for the “village” it takes to thrive.

Final note: The Drake conversation, teased in the intro, appears at [65:33] and is more about comparing "vibes" than picking sides—see timecodes and quotes above!

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For those who haven’t listened: This episode offers a rare, honest perspective on modern fatherhood, relationships, resilience, and community—with plenty of laughs alongside the insight. Highly recommended for anyone navigating family, change, or just in need of some big-hearted humor.

Transcript

[Ego Wodem]

This is an I heart podcast.

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[Ego Wodem]

Now you know where to go to.

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[Ego Wodem]

It's TJ Maxx.

[TJ Maxx Advertiser]

Of course, it's shaping up to be a very magical holiday.

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[Ego Wodem]

All right, guys. Wow, Zowie. I say things like that, by the way. I say things like wow, Zowie. And totally megodly. And gosh, what's the other one? I say totally megodly. Wowee, Zowie. And I can't remember but like refuse to say the word awesome because I'm like, that's corny. But I say these other things. I don't know what my criteria is for corny. I don't know who makes the rules. Apparently me. But somehow they're messed up. Anyway, guys, I'm thinking about how we can make this world a better place. I've been doing a lot of thinking about it and. And that's what this podcast is about. It's about gratitude. It's about manners. It's about making the world lovely again. And I have been thinking about specifically, I need to clear my throat again. You'll hear that I have allergies. Honestly, for my listeners, I want you to get into it. I have allergies. Where all my allergy girlies and boys and they at, huh? Where's everybody at? Allergies. Why are we going to pretend we're recording podcasts and we don't have allergies? We have allergies. I have them. I will stand and be the face of the allergy afflicted community. That's not what I want to say to you. I've just gone on a tangent. Why would anyone ever give me a microphone? It's crazy, but they did. And I got something to say. So emails. What a beautiful gift from the Almighty that we each have an email address, some of us, many, myself included. I'd say I have six burners. I have real ones. I have burners. And I'm giving some of you. Oh, I shouldn't say this, but I'm gonna say it. I'm giving some of you my burner email because I don't trust that you'll have the proper decorum. And I'm gonna talk to you guys about what that proper decorum is. When someone gives you their email address, I really think it is violent to throw them on. They give you their email address for one thing. A1. Off you go. Let me get your email for this. I'll shoot you an email, no problem. Someone gives you their email and they, for one thing, you're going to shoot them an email. Fine, no problem. The violence begins when you then put them on a mailing list. Okay. And there's tears to this violence. There's like the mailchimp violence and that is putting them on a newsletter via mailchimp, putting them on this address book on mailchimp. And, and, and, and now they're getting a newsletter every week, every month that they didn't sign up for. You're now giving them the task of clicking unsubscribe at the bottom of the email. And then, and then they ask you why do you want to unsubscribe? And every time I am going to click because I did not sign up for this and this person has to go to jail. That's not that it actually says, but, but it should say that. Throw them in the jail. But the people who really need to go to jail, the people who then put you on a mailing list where it's not a mailchimp, they've created their own. You're on a bcc. I'm in hell. I'm in hell. I'm on a bcc. I'm on a newsletter. I'm on a group email. It keeps coming to me every month and I now have the task of emailing this person I may or may not even know well and saying, hi, I'd love to be removed from this list that I never asked to be a part of. You've abused, abused. You've abused having my email address, even if it is the burner. It's, it's violent and I have to email them and say, hey, hope you're well. Also don't know you that well, but can you take me off of your mailing list that I didn't sign up for where you're like giving me updates on whatever you have going on now. You know, I gave you this email address for one thing and here you are using it for another. I'm going to go ahead and say, not cool. Not cool, guys. So if someone gives you their email address and I know it's, someone's going to go easy for you to say, listen, I'm not putting, I'm not just throwing people willy nilly on mailing lists. I don't think I've ever been like, here's my new not. I don't think I know. I haven't gone, here's my newsletter you did not sign up for and now you're part of it and you're BCC and you're going to have to email me as an individual, which I know you don't want to do. To say, get up the list, take me off the list. No one wants to do that. That is such an awkward exchange. And so guys, if someone gives you the email address, use it for the thing. And if you want to add them to a mailing list, ask if they'd like to be included. The onus should be on you to do the work to then form the list accordingly. Not to make people go, I have to email them awkwardly and be like, can you take me off, please? Hope you're well, hope everything's good. Happy holidays. You know, let's be. Let's operate with some decorum when it comes to email addresses, okay? And that, my friends, is my official platform because I will not be running for office, as I've mentioned many times here, but maybe by the time we do enough episodes of the podcast, I'll have a real platform to stand on and I could run for office. Apparently there are no rules anymore. Whatever. Tbd. Will I be president? Will I not. We go see. Which is something I like to say all the time about everything in life we gonna see because it's true. I. And that's a Drake thing. And that is someone I talk about with Ron Funches. Actually, I'm not going to tell you where in the episode we talk about Drake, but it's in there and it's a good conversation. Ron is wise, he's got a lot of heart, and my God, he is funny. So you're going to want to listen to this combo and this combo is actually going to stick with me, namely because of the stuff he said about Drake, which I won't be telling you where in the episode it is. And there's no way you can rub the scrubber. Pull the scrubber deeper in the episode trying to find it. That'd be too much work. Just listen, do yourself a solid. Do me a solid. Actually, actually British now. Oh my gosh. Someone get the episode going. I might up this intro.

[Ron Funches]

Do it.

[Ego Wodem]

But let's see what happens if I do it up. Will you call me out?

[Ron Funches]

Oh, absolutely.

[Ego Wodem]

In the middle and then I want us to keep it.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Sure.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. Okay. That's what she's. Do I scare you a little bit?

[Ron Funches]

No, you don't scare me. I just getting to know you, I just. Cuz I've only seen you from afar, so I've never been around your energy in person and still kind of sussing it.

[Ego Wodem]

What do you think of it so far?

[Ron Funches]

I like it. You seem intelligent. You seem a Little bit sometimes like scattery, but in a way that I haven't found.

[Ego Wodem]

Where's the camera?

[Ron Funches]

Negative in any fashion. You seem funny and intelligent so far.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay, thank you. You see how you did that criticism sandwich? It was positive. Slight critic. Positive. That's the way to do it.

[Ron Funches]

I didn't want to lie.

[Ego Wodem]

You're like, I am clocking some scattered.

[Ron Funches]

Energy and I told me you have a bag that you keep souping.

[Ego Wodem]

I do. It's a. I have a. Well, now I have to tell the people, Ron. Tell the people. I have to confess to the people. I have a Chloe bag. And that is a fancy bag. It's quite expensive. It's.

[Ron Funches]

What's the retail?

[Ego Wodem]

The retail. I'm going to go ahead and say, is that trashy?

[Ron Funches]

I mean, I asked.

[Ego Wodem]

That was a trashy question. But I like it.

[Ron Funches]

I just want to know. Maybe I'm in the market.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. For a handbag. Who. When I asked you what you had on you, you don't even have your wallet.

[Ron Funches]

No, I mean, I have my wallet.

[Ego Wodem]

But you might get a handbag.

[Ron Funches]

I might buy a handbag.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay, so maybe like 1200.

[Ron Funches]

1200 is good.

[Ego Wodem]

1200 bones. And then so I. It's a nice, nice bag. Beautiful purse. I carry it everywhere. But I do do disgusting things such as. And not limited to putting meals in the purse. Not properly sealed. And I don't know, I. I think they're properly sealed. And then I discover later, oh, there's soup dripping in my handbag. The sauce from this. This chicken dish is.

[Ron Funches]

Is a tiki masala. You just throw that straight in.

[Ego Wodem]

Straight in that.

[Ron Funches]

No bag. Nothing.

[Ego Wodem]

No bag. Raw. Raw in my purse. I took it to a cleaner cuz I was like, I guess I had to throw this away. But I was like, I'm not throwing away this expensive handbag. I love this bag. It. It's. It is. It's everything to me. So I was like, I should take it to a cleaner. Cuz that's what people do. When people have nice things. They get it like, clean. They don't replace. So I took it. And they're like, we don't think we could do anything with what's happening in this bag. They were like, you. We. You can pay us to try, but we're not making any promises. There's a lot that h. It's a lot. And there's no order in my purse. So when you say scattered, it's like you read me because you were not wrong not to be defensive when I reach I go in the bag and I feel for my belongings because there's no order in that bag. But everything I need, though, and then some is in that bag. I just want to say, but this isn't about me.

[Ron Funches]

It can be.

[Ego Wodem]

No, no, no. What if I brought you here for me to just talk at you about what's going on with my purse?

[Ron Funches]

That'd be like most podcasts.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh, snap. Whoever's who's ever. Whoever's had Ron as a guest on their podcast. He's coming for you. He's coming for you. Ron is holding no punches today. I won't do the thing I make your name rhyme.

[Ron Funches]

Thank you.

[Ego Wodem]

But I will give people context for the thing I'm referring to by saying that. Okay. Anyway, my next guest with whom I've been speaking, I'm so bad at intros, they have to fire me because I do this every time I start the episode and I'm like, shit, I should introduce you. My next guest. Okay. My next guest needs no introduction, so we're going to keep the conversation going. I'm kidding. I'm not saving Letterman. My next guest is an actor and comedian. He is on season three of Loot. Right. And you are on Celebrity Traitors, which is premiering in January. Ron funches everybody. Hi. Clap in studio. Let's get some audio from this. Yes. That is three enthusiastic people right there.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah, I like. You're like a. Like a middle aged boy band.

[Ego Wodem]

I know. They really could be in the boy band. Maybe we could get your pictures in. Maybe I should take a picture of. I want to give the people a picture of what Ron is referring to. I'll take it. Yep.

[Ron Funches]

This is who stuff. Oh, nice. You already got into your attitude.

[Ego Wodem]

They got in their attitude. Hold on, I'm gonna get really close. I'm zooming, baby. Hold on. I'm zooming. This is. Hold on. They got it. My lens is so fucking ashy. I hate it.

[Ron Funches]

That's the soup from the bag.

[Ego Wodem]

The soup from the bag.

[Ron Funches]

He's got soup skin on him.

[Ego Wodem]

We're putting that in. We're putting that in. Y' all look good. You did look like a middle. That was quick of you. That is exactly what they look like. Hello. Hi. Oh, my goodness. It is a delight to be talking to you.

[Ron Funches]

It's a pleasure.

[Ego Wodem]

I'm so happy to have you here and I will not be talking at you.

[Ron Funches]

Okay.

[Ego Wodem]

Like other podcasts, I am committed on doing things differently around here.

[Ron Funches]

I love that.

[Ego Wodem]

I'm sorry for your previous experiences.

[Ron Funches]

Thank You. It's okay.

[Ego Wodem]

We're healing.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

As a community. The podcast community. Right. Okay. What are you thankful for? What do you want to say? Thanks to who or what?

[Ron Funches]

Oh, can I have more than one? Or does it have to be one?

[Ego Wodem]

You can go crazy. Honestly, I've been talking at you so much. I would love for you to do more than one.

[Ron Funches]

Sure. I appreciate the question because I've been very thankful lately. I'm thankful for the group of friends that I have around that I work with and do shows with. I'm always grateful for them. But the other day, I, like, I threw my back out the day before we had this show that they do. It's kind of a bit of a variety show, so there's a bit of, like, there's a lot of memorization. We rehearsed quite a bit for it.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Ron Funches]

And so I was, like, concerned that my back going out. Like, I couldn't even really walk around until a few hours before the show. But, like, nobody freaked out. Everybody was just like, we'll handle the rehearsals on our own. You just get ready for the show. And we just. We're just going to nail it, and it's going to be fun. And we had such a great time, and it was so nice to. In a business that I'm in that often feels like everything's on my shoulders. I often feel like everything's on my shoulders. I have two kids. I have my, you know, son at an early age. I have a lot of things I. Multiple employees. So I always feel like I carry a lot. And it was, like, a moment where I really realized that other people have my back and really want me to succeed and want the best for me and. And, like, don't. It was just nice to be like, oh, I don't have to carry everything on my own. So I'm really thankful for the group of people I have around me. Thankful for the time that I have with my mom now that she's getting older and I'm an adult, where I feel like I'm learning more from her now as an adult than I did even when I was a kid, you know, just through her life lessons and through the things that she's been through. I know a lot of people my age can't talk with their parents, and so to have the type of relationship that I have with my mom, I'm very thankful for. Thankful for my boys, thankful for my job, thankful for the time that we live in right now where things get more clear, which is good for me.

[Ego Wodem]

Know, some people would not say thankful for this time, I have to say. So tell me more.

[Ron Funches]

I just think sometimes when you don't have things to stand up for or things that you really feel. I mean, I hate when people speak in general, so I'll just be specific, please. When you have something like the ice raids that are going on and you really get to see who is willing to, like, be like, this is wrong, or like, I don't believe in this, or other people who either are proudly be like, yeah, I love it, or just stay silent and it really indicates and lets me know, like, who is following on the same path that I'm trying to go on, who is who I should spend more time with and more of my energy in, because I'm a very loyal and very giving person. So. And especially within our comedy community, like, if anybody, like, it doesn't like money or if it sounds funny, or you just were like, hey, cause you're helping this. I'm always like, yeah, I'd love to, but these past few years have taught me to value my time, my energy, my. To be more selective to who I give my energy and my time with. And if you're not really trying to do what I'm doing or you're not, like, you don't believe the things I believe, or you don't have the moral fiber that I think you need to have, I just don't want to work with you or be around you.

[Ego Wodem]

I love how clear you are about what works for you at this phase in your life. That's really great.

[Ron Funches]

Thank you.

[Ego Wodem]

And also, too, I'm going to clear my throat. Allergies brought to you by allergies. That is such a beautiful long list. Because normally it is, like, one thing, but to hear how clear you are about what works for you, what doesn't, how lovely your life is, how surrounded you are by lovely people, partially by birth and then also by design. And your own curation of your circle seems particularly special. Now, when you say what's going on right now concerning the ice raids and such, and you see people not saying things or saying things or loving it or being excited about it, and that being informative for you about who you want to be around and which of those people you should be, which of those you'd rather not be around, how do you feel about people not feeling comfortable or confident saying anything? Because they might think my Instagram story or my post isn't really going to change anything. What do you. What do you feel about that?

[Ron Funches]

I'm Understanding and empathetic to that. I understand the type of either apathy or just feeling small at a time where things feel so big. There's some people, you know, when you look at it, you go like, if you are in opposition of what's going on, you're like, well, they have the government, they have media, they have all this. I'm all one. I'm just one person. But I would say to fight that, that, like, there is a reason why we're constantly kind of deluged with, like, chaos and things that kind of keep us disorganized is because we are powerful. There's a reason why they got. They. When they came to take over, they went through the podcast bros. And through comedy because art is powerful. And so I would say that don't. What's the point if you're gonna lose? Lose swinging is what I would say.

[Ego Wodem]

That's true.

[Ron Funches]

Why. Why not? I. I would rather. I mean, I post things all the time where. And I've been just trying to get better at my business and be like, okay, I want to get a million followers. That would be cool. Cool. But then nothing stops me from posting things that end up. I lose, like, 20,000 followers in a day, you know? But I don't go like, oh, no, I shouldn't post that.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Ron Funches]

I go, oh, those people wouldn't have come to a show anyway.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Ron Funches]

Because they would have figured out me at some point.

[Ego Wodem]

At some point, like, oh, this. This is what that man stands for.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

I don't want to like him. Yeah.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah. So I'd rather you. I'd rather we all know.

[Ego Wodem]

No now and no early.

[Ron Funches]

Exactly.

[Ego Wodem]

Get out of here.

[Ron Funches]

Exactly.

[Ego Wodem]

I get that. And you're. You said you're. You have a great relationship with your mom now, and you're able to spe. Speak to her in a way that you see some of your friends are not able to, presumably because maybe some of their parents are not around still. And also, I know that it's hard for some people, and certainly my generation, to talk to their parents pretty openly. And so it's very cool that you have that relationship. You're still learning from her now even more than you did when you were younger. What are some of the things you feel like you've learned from her now that were not clear to you when you were younger?

[Ron Funches]

Oh, man, that's a great question. I just probably say the importance of longevity and survival and just, like, staying authentic to yourself. There's things that, like, I went through a very tumultuous Sometimes I say words wrong.

[Ego Wodem]

You did a great job, honestly. If you had said it with your.

[Ron Funches]

Whole chest, then you would have been like, damn, that's how you say that? That's how you say that?

[Ego Wodem]

Tumultuous. I would be like, wait, have I been saying it wrong? I've been saying it wrong, y'. All. We all been saying it wrong. It's tumentulous. Okay? It's volatility and tumultulous.

[Ron Funches]

All up in here.

[Ego Wodem]

All up in here. I'm looking around. What is going on? What is going on in here? Because next time with your whole chest. I learned that in ballet. Strong and wrong.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

You could be doing the wrong ass move. Everyone else doing the right one. But if you do that with your whole chest.

[Ron Funches]

Are you. You're a ballet.

[Ego Wodem]

For 10 years, I was a ballerina. But I'm no Misty Copeland, okay? I'm no Misty Copeland.

[Ron Funches]

I'm. And who is that?

[Ego Wodem]

And who among us? You're a boy band. So wait, I remember.

[Ron Funches]

I'll tell you, okay? Please. But I. I just had a terrible divorce. I fixed the word and found a way, okay? And I was just very distraught about it and lost a bunch of money and lost some friends and lost a bunch of things. And then my mom just has a great way of just wrapping things up in a bow. And so I think I was real depressed. Hadn't gotten out of bed in a while, and my mom was just asking me questions. She goes like, well, how long were you married? I was like, two years. And she's like, well, how long did you guys. How long did you say, you know, in total? And I was like, probably like four or four and a half years. And she just looks at me and she goes, I had breast cancer longer than that. Yeah, Mom.

[Ego Wodem]

I'm like, I need to meet Mom. Oh, my goodness. That is perspective, though.

[TJ Maxx Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

But I think when you're in some. Something that feels so tragic and, like, gut wrenching for you, it can be so hard to have that bigger perspective. Even like, what I. What I. What I like about what she said wasn't that, like, I had it worse than you? It was. I had this awful thing happening for longer than that, and here I am, in a sense.

[Ron Funches]

Exactly.

[Ego Wodem]

This is a fraction. I had a friend, when I was really going through a thing, be like, this is a blip. And the way that was so liberating to me in that moment, I'm like. That resonates with me that she would say, I had breast cancer longer than that. Than that. Four years total. Longer than that. And I'm all good, presumably, Right. Yeah, yeah. What a wise, wise woman.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah, it was exactly that. Of just being, like, thinking about all. How scary that time period was for all of us and especially her. And then to remember how much fun and how many great experiences we've had since then. It was just a clear thing of like, oh, yeah, she's right. This. I'll get over it and we'll have a long life after this. Yeah, yeah, A lot of stuff like that. Like, my mom is. When my friends have an issue, if they have any type. Like, my friend's dog passed away and he literally came to my house and just was like, will you call your mom for me so I can talk to her?

[Ego Wodem]

Oh, community mom.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

That is amazing. And she talked to him, didn't she?

[Ron Funches]

Oh, yeah, she talked him through it. Because that's the thing is that my mom's been through a lot of different situations. She's, you know, she's worked in a prison, she's been a social worker. She's been an abusive relationship. She's been in, like, every. She had breast cancer. She's been through so many things. And that's one of the biggest lessons that she's taught me, the value of strength and experience in that of not being like, oh, I'm a victim. I've been through these many things. It's like, I've survived all these things and my life is still great. And now my son does TV shows and my daughter's a doctor.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh, incredible.

[Ron Funches]

Come on.

[Ego Wodem]

Go, mom.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

No. Did you guys have a relationship with your dad?

[Ron Funches]

Yeah, I mean, it's. It is not, as you can hear from my voice change.

[Ego Wodem]

I mean, the whole. Because I was about to say something. I was going to say something, but I said, let me let him cook. Because I was like. I was going to say, we got a whole. The pitch. It switches up, the whole demeanor.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah, you kind of. Not the same relationship. My eyes went this way.

[Ego Wodem]

My eyes started darting. I'm like, we were here. And then you were here, here. You're like, yeah, I don't know. Yeah, okay, so it's different.

[Ron Funches]

Yes.

[Ego Wodem]

And that's okay. Be like that sometimes. And in fact, I. I would say the premise of this podcast is that it be like that most of the time it's different. And so it was different. What was it like? If you care to share.

[Ron Funches]

I mean, the best way I could put it is that he wasn't there for most of the time. That I needed him. He was there for me in a time where I, I needed him the most.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Ron Funches]

And so there's always an appreciation and a value in that. I would say that he hasn't met my 3 year old son. And then the last time I saw him for his birthday, he just mostly asked me what type of car I drive.

[Ego Wodem]

And that's, that's our relationship. Yeah. Okay, I get that. That is, it sounds like a limited tool set for a connection.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

But do you recognize the, like the car question as a bid for connection or how do you receive that?

[Ron Funches]

Mostly just a check in on how I'm doing in life. What type of car would I be driving?

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. Like, impress him like, how you're doing and like, are you, are you making money? Type of. Okay. And did you tell him what kind of car? Yeah, you were like, okay, yeah, but.

[Ron Funches]

I mean, but I can't even. Because he wants to know the year and all that.

[Ego Wodem]

And I'm like, I don't, I don't know. How long was the phone call?

[Ron Funches]

I mean, I went to, I went to his birthday party.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay, that's nice.

[Ron Funches]

It was nice.

[Ego Wodem]

Did you speak?

[Ron Funches]

I did speak and I saw some friends and I saw family. We mostly, I, I, it was a big group, which was great.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. Okay. Diffuse. Thank God. Okay. Other people spoke as well. Right. It wasn't okay.

[Ron Funches]

And again, more perspective of just seeing all the different types of lives in my family and people doing, you know, a lot of things to celebrate where people were just like, I have a half brother and his main thing was he's just like, man, I'm clean and sober and I've been out of jail for a couple years now, and that's my main focus.

[Ego Wodem]

And that's the bar for him. It's different. Yeah. Life looks like, but.

[Ron Funches]

And I'm like, that's beautiful. Yeah, that's amazing. I'm proud of you. And if you, and I don't want to get into it, but his background, if you knew his background, you'd be like, oh, hell yeah, I'm proud of you. Because you could just be like, my life's been terrible and I'm just gonna stay on drugs.

[Ego Wodem]

Yes. Well, the will to keep going in general, regardless of what your situation is, I think is such a sign of resilience that we all have within us. Some of us are less able to harness it than others. But when someone is able to harness that will to, like, keep going and keep living and keep trying, I think is a remarkable thing that we don't celebrate enough, frankly. There's lots of reasons to. To stop going, I would say. Right. There's many, many, many reasons. Right. You said that your dad, though, was not around for most of the time, but when you needed him most, he was there. Which sounds remarkably unique in that a lot of people, myself included, would be like, my dad wasn't there most of the time. My dad wasn't there when I would have needed him most. Like, our first real conversation was when I was 18 in LA, in college. Like, I had made it, essentially. Mom did all the hard stuff. What was that moment that you needed him most that he was able to show up for, even broadly speaking? Yeah.

[Ron Funches]

It was just that my mom had found herself in an abusive relationship for many years, and it was affecting our family. And like many people, she was having a hard time just getting out of that cycle. And it was easier for. We had gotten contact with my dad, who was moving to Oregon, and it was just an easier situation for us to leave and go to there, as opposed to her getting rid of him.

[Ego Wodem]

Got it.

[Ron Funches]

So my dad, you know, besides us not having seen him for like eight, nine years, took me and my sister and we lived with him in Oregon with his. With his lady, who also was terrible in an abuse. Oh, gosh.

[Ego Wodem]

That turned into a terrible situation too.

[Ron Funches]

It's not a movie.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay, okay.

[Ron Funches]

But again, but I don't think if I hadn't left Chicago, I would have never, like, I wouldn't have discovered my individuality and who I am. It taught me so much. Just like the cultural differences from being from the south side of Chicago and then moving to this lily white town in Salem, Oregon. It really just taught me to see people as individuals. And, you know, my mom was just very much about being a student and being focused on things. And I was very silly and had a interest in comedy from a very young age. And I don't think without the buffer of being away from my mom, I don't think I would have been a comedian, so.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh, wow. So, like a really crucial time in your life. How many years were you in Salem?

[Ron Funches]

I was in Salem from when I was 12 until 22. Well, I mean, I bounced around a bit in Oregon, but yeah, 22, 23.

[Ego Wodem]

Wow. Okay, so it was a cool 10 years. Yeah, amazing. And so you had your son then when you were in Oregon, your. Your eldest. So you have two sons?

[Ron Funches]

Yep.

[Ego Wodem]

Is it. What values are you trying to instill in both of these?

[Ron Funches]

Thank you. Mostly right now, a lot of empathy. I think is important because I don't think that's being culturally mirrored a lot. We're being taught recently to like, just think about for yourself and look out for yourself only. And so I try to really instill in my sons to be kind to other people, to not be a pushover, not be like, you know, a sucker, but to that we are a collective. And so that you have to look at the world like that. It's different. But for both of my sons. My oldest is on the autism spectrum and he kind of grew up. He saw mostly poor. And then his last 10 years have been different.

[Ego Wodem]

Right.

[Ron Funches]

Whereas my youngest came in smiling.

[Ego Wodem]

He came in, he wasn't crying. The doctor's like, why is he not crying? It's because he knows we're rich.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah, no, that's what I said. I go, he knows the life he has.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. He's like, hold on, I'm not crying. He's like, no, doc, I'm alive, I'm breathing, I'm rich.

[Ron Funches]

But you can see it in him already. He's more demanding. He's more just spoiled. He's more spoiled. And so I am really focusing on him of just trying to discipline, empathy, hard work, and mostly just try a connectivity with family. Because again, when my oldest having autism, one of my grand schemes is to hopefully be like, hey guys, I gotta die. Could you look after each other?

[Ego Wodem]

Okay, I see. So you're like, you're gonna. The youngest. You're like, you're going to be the bridge with the rest of the family. And so, okay, hopefully.

[Ron Funches]

But I mean, I know people, individuals. I'm trying to prepare my oldest to be able to live on his own. But like, if they could look out for each other, it would really give me a lot of peace.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah, right. I have a few friends whose children are on the spectrum and I really do wonder what that experience. And I know I at this point in my life don't know because I haven't had that experience, but I imagine when you speak to the peace and the desire for peace, especially of with how your son's taken care of when you're not here, what is it that exactly concerns you?

[Ron Funches]

Just that he is large. He's like six foot tall, six foot two, big guy. He is friendly and happy, but he's also a black kid and he can be. He doesn't listen to directions as quickly as most. So I worry about his interactions with police. I worry about his inner. I mean, I just took him to a party the other day because I was like, oh, he's 22. He can go to a party with me and tell him to a Halloween party. And it's just watching him interact with people and knowing I can't step in and go, oh, he has autism. Like, I have to watch them kind of come up, talk to him, and then see their interactions and then. And what's beautiful is usually it's just plays off, like, they just end up just still chitchatting for a while. It never becomes an issue, but a couple of times it has, really. And I worry about those things when I'm not there to diffuse it, when they're not. When someone doesn't get him and then they're, like, aggressive about it.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh, yeah. And you've stepped in in the past. Yeah. It had to be like, okay, this is what's going on.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

Have you tried. I don't know how this works. Do you give him the tools to try to make that clear in those moments? I don't know how that would even.

[Ron Funches]

That's the point. You know, I never, I never been like, hey, maybe you should be like, hey, I'm Malcolm. I have autism. You know.

[Ego Wodem]

I love it. He's like, this is who I am.

[Ron Funches]

This is.

[Ego Wodem]

But I, I, I can only imagine as a parent, that's the thing with my friends too, where I go. I know one of them was like, I just worry their son is 20, and they're like, I hope I'm around for a long time because he's gonna sweetest pie their son. But, like, he's gonna have to live with me, I feel like. And I wonder if he'll ever have a girlfriend or a boyfriend. And what that will be like is that you share those concerns too.

[Ron Funches]

Absolutely.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Ron Funches]

And everything goes as time, you know, he shows his interest in things at his own pace. He did. We went to the strip club for his 21st birthday.

[Ego Wodem]

That's magic City, my favorite. Only been once heard. The wings are good, though. Need to go for a meal.

[Ron Funches]

And so I do. And I asked him when we talk about it, and he's part of this foundation that called the Ed Asner foundation that does a great job as far as, like, social skills and work placement, and they do, like, date nights and things like that. So, yeah, I just try to listen to him and let him lead on all that type of stuff.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Ron Funches]

And yeah, I think one of the reasons why I ended up in the marriage I ended up is that I was looking for that. I was like, I need someone to help me. Like, I Can't do this on my own. And I need someone else to help me watch my son. And so even when I wasn't, like, when I could see, like, oh, this isn't exactly right. I'd be like, well, she's here and.

[Ego Wodem]

She wants to be here. Yes. And she's willing.

[Ron Funches]

Right.

[Ego Wodem]

And I don't know if anyone else will be willing. I think you're like, I don't know.

[Ron Funches]

And I need to try to make too much. I'm too much.

[Ego Wodem]

I hate that. But I feel like we've all felt that at times.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah. And now it's been the exact. Like, now that, like, she's at the home and been out of that situation. Like, my son's the best roommate I could ever hope for. Like, he cleans the house. Like, I. Like, he was gone for a week, and I was like, oh, my God, the house is so dirty. Whatever.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah, get him back. As a matter of fact, I need him more than he needs me. Yes. That's amazing.

[Ron Funches]

I don't know how to use the dishwasher.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. By the way, I didn't know how to use the dishwasher for a very long time. And I feel like at least a lot of Nigerians. I know. We had a dishwasher in my house when we moved out of that house and sold that house we lived in from. I. We moved in when I was in second grade. My mom sold that house when I was 24. The tag of the dishwasher was still inside the dishwasher. I did not. We were not like. And I know my brother's married now, and his wife, I feel like, had to make him like, we use dishwasher around here. We were hand washing everything. Dishwasher was like, decor in our house. Like, we can afford one. You'd better not use that shit. You have soap, you have sponge. You know what to do. I didn't know how to. I didn't. And I had to watch a YouTube video. This is like my first season on SNL in my apartment because I had a dishwasher. I watched a YouTube be like, how do you load this motherfucker? I don't know. And then I was like, down a rabbit hole of, like, everyone has their different ways couples fight about it. And I was like, well, it's just me in here. So I get to load this thing how I want. But I am trying to learn from an expert on YouTube how to learn a load of dishwasher. So wait, you didn't know? You didn't know either. My kid.

[Ron Funches]

No, I knew how to load a general dishwasher.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. Sorry, I'm dumbass.

[Ron Funches]

No, I. Look, hey, I wouldn't say it. Dumbass. It was more of a story about hard work and intentionality that they wanted you to hand wash everything. I feel like that's actually a great lesson. More is more that we moved into my new house and since I've been in a new house, I've never used a dishwasher because my son washes the dishes every day.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay, so you're like, I don't know how that machine works. Okay. Because I haven't touched it. Shout out to him for doing that. I'm obsessed. That's like, now I'm like, I need to get a son. That's what I need. I need a son immediately.

[Ron Funches]

Foreign.

[Ryan Seacrest]

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[Ron Funches]

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[Ron Funches]

All I know is what I've been told. And that's a half truth is a whole lie.

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[Ron Funches]

I'm telling you, we know Quincy killed her.

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[Ron Funches]

I did not know her and I did not kill her or rape or burn or any of that other stuff that y' all said.

[Ego Wodem]

They literally made me say that I.

[Ron Funches]

Took a match and struck and threw it on her.

[Ego Wodem]

They made me say that I poured gas on her.

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[Ron Funches]

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[Ego Wodem]

So you said that being with your ex, it's like this person is here. They're willing. I'm too much. I come with a lot of baggage. You obviously a divorce. What did you learn from that relationship ultimately and how it came to be what you were in need of, what you realized maybe you don't need from another person? What did you. How would you articulate what you've Learned.

[Ron Funches]

Oh. I mean, it'd be difficult because it's so long, but it was the worst thing I've been through in my life. That turned out to be, like, the biggest blessing for me. And just the fact that it really reinstilled who I am. I had to kind of just refine what was important to me, what I do for fun. I think that in that relationship, I bent a lot of what I enjoyed, and what I did was not necessarily shared. And so slowly, I'd be like, okay, well, she just doesn't like that, so that's fine. I do that on my own. But now we're spending more time together, so I'm just not gonna go do those things. Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Ron Funches]

And slowly but surely, it was more and more that. Where I was feeling isolated and feeling like I didn't. I got to the point where I would, like, second guess my own jokes because I would worry about how they would feel about what I was writing. And I'm always. I always write from a place of love and a place thing, but I would, like. I don't want to go home and get an argument about what this joke meant. And it was just really throwing me off. I think a bad relationship, especially when you're holding on to something that you know is not good for you, can really throw you off your path in every conceivable way.

[Ego Wodem]

100%.

[Ron Funches]

It was affecting my comedy. It was affecting my skills as a parent, affecting my health. I was gaining weight a lot again and just going through it and being able to be by myself and live with that solitude and try things that I never. I mean, now I do jiu Jitsu and I go to Pilates. I got a Pilates class after this.

[Ego Wodem]

Me too. Come on. Same place. No, probably not.

[Ron Funches]

Probably not.

[Ego Wodem]

I don't know why I said probably now. We don't know.

[Ron Funches]

We don't. But I wouldn't know because I probably would have seen you there.

[Ego Wodem]

That's true. That's true. That's fair.

[Ron Funches]

Fair. So I just really. It's feels like this whole relationship and getting out of it just taught me to refocus on who I am, know myself more, know my boundaries, about who I want around me and who I don't want around me. It's taught me so much. So it turned out to be the. It taught me my strength.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. That's incredible. And honestly, I feel like saying this thing that was the worst thing that happened to you ended up being a huge blessing in disguise. Sounds so cliche, but I think life Y' all might be cliches, and the cliches are rooted in something real. Because I can name some of my lowest moments and been like, but this makes sense ultimately. And it's actually what I needed. And I never would have done X, Y, or Z if I didn't have that experience. So to be able to have that perspective and feel clear on that now, I think is really lovely. And the notion that you're, like, pouring into yourself and doing what you like and you're back on your game and you're doing the jokes you want to do and you are doing things you want to do for you is remarkably beautiful. And it feels crazy and rudimentary. Maybe even to be like, yeah, you have to find someone who likes you. And, and, and. And hopefully you guys enjoy many of the same things. And there's more overlap than there isn't, which sounds basic, but I think all of us can say we've been in a relationship with someone where you're like, this thing really threw me off my game, being connected to this person, because, yeah, just being tethered to another can do that. But I've been in a relationship with someone who didn't like me. And you're like, oh, they didn't really like me. Like, this idea. We were, like, committed to an idea.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

And that happens. So to hear your perspective is really cool.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah. 100 say that, because that's what it was. And I would say that directly to her. I'd be like, I think you like the idea of me. You like the product of me, but you don't like me.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. I think we have all been there. And I. I mean, at least I can say for myself 100%. And so now I go to. I say to friends, I'm like, crazy idea. Date someone that likes you and date someone you like, because it's easy to chase ideas. Now, as far as your sons and their relationships to be, do you have wishes for them beyond dating people who like them for them?

[Ron Funches]

No real wishes. I just want them to be happy. I mean, that was a big part of. Because when we originally separated, my youngest was only six months. And so it was a very hard decision to be like, oh, again. I built this ideal of like, oh, I'm going to go out on the road. I'll come home, daddy. Oh, my husband. No, no, no. It's going to be beautiful time. And then very quickly, I was like, this isn't going to be beautiful.

[Ego Wodem]

And so this is looking kind of ugly.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah. And I just remember Sitting and looking at him in his crib and just being like, oh, if he comes to me as an adult later and he was in this type of relationship, and I. The advice I would give him would be to leave. And if I can't give him that advice, if I don't follow it.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. Yes. I've recently had to make tough decisions, and I have said. I think someone said to me, like, when you're making a decision, the thing that has been helpful for them and now I have adopted, is like, what do you want to tell your kids you did in this moment? What do you want to tell your grandkids you did in this moment? And that is such a good way to shake into doing something you may not want to do or that might be uncomfortable, but, you know, in your heart of hearts you need to do.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah, no, I think about that a lot. That. Whether it's in a relationship or, you know, went out to the. The no Kings protest in Portland, and it wasn't necessarily. And again, that's the thing where, like. Where I'm like, oh, I myself may not make the biggest difference, but I do. If my kids ask me if my youngest asked me 10, 15 years from now, and they're reading about this time period or whatever, and then he goes, daddy, did you do anything about freedom of speech? Did you do anything about immigrants? Did you do anything about our Hispanic friends? My. You know, one of him was like, yeah, that your dad was out there.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Ron Funches]

You know.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. Kids, a guiding force, quite frankly. Guiding force. Your sons sound incredibly special now. How, if you were to date, are you dating? You are. How long before a woman can meet the kids?

[Ron Funches]

A while.

[Ego Wodem]

How. What's. Do you have a. Do you have a time limit?

[Ron Funches]

I would probably, like, say, like, six months.

[Ego Wodem]

Six months?

[Ron Funches]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. I thought you were gonna say, like, a year.

[Ron Funches]

No, I think because my kids are a big, big. Like, I'm with them all the time. So a year would be.

[Ego Wodem]

That is kind of crazy. Like, that they would be secrets in this.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

Do you tell on a first date? You're like, I have kids.

[Ron Funches]

Oh, it's a. It'll be. I mean, I don't have a dating profile right now, but if I did, it's right. Father. Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

People are out here with secrets. I know that. It's really crazy.

[Ron Funches]

No, I get that.

[Ego Wodem]

Like, yeah, well, you have a good head on your shoulders. I've heard so many stories about people's. The secrets abound. And it's like, why would you bury that? I'm sorry, what did you say about having a son? I'd be like, wait, that's crazy. But I've talked to you for two months. What was that a child? Okay, that's good to know.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah, I never. I've heard that before. I've heard about people. A girl that date that my girlfriend, her sister deals with, a guy who like, didn't want to claim that it was his kid. And I was like, for like over for a while. And so I was just like, I get the fear. I get the thing. Especially if you're not like, in that person you're in a relationship with then. But like to me that I am like, I am my sons, like, you know, like, to not be connected to them would be the worst thing in my life because I would feel like I had a disconnection from myself.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Ron Funches]

So, like, knowing what my boys are up to, knowing what their life is celebrating them. And again, I mean, it is not hurting dating. I always tell people, especially if they're single dad that worry. It's like, okay, well, either you're gonna find a really good, really like, grateful woman that is like, good with kids, or you're gonna get a lot of casual sex because you're a good dad.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. Yeah. And people love that.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

That is a turn on when you go, wow. But he loves his kids. I can.

[Ron Funches]

I don't want to stay with him and raise him a little bit of.

[Ego Wodem]

A little bit of. Cuz he taking care of his kids. Do you see the way he's taking care of those kids? He could really use some pussy.

[Ron Funches]

Just a little bit. He carrying so much.

[Ego Wodem]

Give him a little pussy.

[Ron Funches]

Diane and I thank each and every one of those women.

[Ego Wodem]

Do you want to say thank you to the women who have given you pussy? Thank you.

[Ron Funches]

The little bill or whatever you moved along. Thank you.

[Ego Wodem]

Thank you. You know what? I appreciate that people are saying thank you to those women who gave it up in. In that context and went about their business. No drama.

[Ron Funches]

Oh, that's the best in the world.

[Ego Wodem]

No drama. Thank you. Thank you. Next.

[Ron Funches]

I love that.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. Wow. And I appreciate you saying thank you. I'm so glad you looked right at those women. Can we get some names? No names. No names. No names. But I was gonna say, this isn't a Drake album. We're not naming people. We don't have to name people. They can remain anonymous. So your kids are you. That is beautiful. And you are such a huge part of their lives in a way that you did not have when you Were growing up. Is there anything else that you didn't have when you were growing up that you are making it a point to give them?

[Ron Funches]

Yeah. Money.

[Ego Wodem]

Well, hold on. Because Malcolm didn't have money for the first 10.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah. No, he didn't.

[Ego Wodem]

He didn't.

[Ron Funches]

He did not.

[Ego Wodem]

So do you. Are you, like, giving allowance? Does he have an allowance? What's the story there?

[Ron Funches]

No more. He's just like. If you look through our text. Next conversation is literally. Is just literally. Can I. Can I have a hundred dollars? Can I have a hundred dollars?

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Ron Funches]

Can I have a hundred dollars? Does the laundry get picked up today? Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

And you don't ask for what?

[Ron Funches]

I just give it. You don't.

[Ego Wodem]

You just give it to him. You don't know what he's doing. His hundred dollars.

[Ron Funches]

I usually know his video games or, like, a T shirts.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

All right. You're not bad.

[Ron Funches]

I just. Yeah, I just. You know, I usually get a hundred dollars from the improv for doing a set and then.

[Ego Wodem]

So you just hand it to him?

[Ron Funches]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh, that's nice. That makes me wish I had a dad.

[iHeartRadio Advertiser]

Damn.

[Ego Wodem]

I had a dad. It's so crazy. Just handed me $100. No question.

[Ron Funches]

It does make me. I'm like, this is real dad stuff. Here's $100.

[Ego Wodem]

Don't spend it all in one. Do you ever talk to him about saving?

[Ron Funches]

No.

[Ego Wodem]

I feel like you're a good dad. And then I'm like, he's a bad dad. Haven't talked to this young man about saving.

[Ron Funches]

Not much about. I mean, he. We some good financial literacy, in a way. He knows a bit about budgeting.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Ron Funches]

More the savings. I like just things on my end with his. You know, he has, like, a trust.

[Ego Wodem]

And he, you know, he's a trust fund baby. Oh, I want to have a trust fund baby. I'm gonna have a Nepo baby, but I want to have a trust fund baby.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

That's fun.

[Ron Funches]

I know.

[Ego Wodem]

That's really. I know my son's. I get to say my son's a trust fund baby. Yeah. Both of them.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah. They got. They were way, way more money than I ever had until a few years ago.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. You also said that you understand with your. Your girlfriend's sister who's involved with a guy who's, like, kind of in denial about having a child that you understand. Empathy kicking in, that it's scary at first. Were you so scared to have kids?

[Ron Funches]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. Yeah.

[Ron Funches]

Terrifying. Especially my first one. I. My first son was. I turned 20 March 12th. And he was born April 23rd.

[Ego Wodem]

By the way, you're a Pisces. I'm a Pisces. March 12th is my brother's birthday. Hey, Pisces connect. I knew it was a vibe. I just knew it was a vibe. Okay, so March 12th. Your birthday.

[Ron Funches]

March 12th. And then so I. So I. When she was pregnant, I was 19, basically. So as a teenager about to have a kid, and at already, you know, it's not like. I was like, okay, you can have abortion. Whatever. We had. Already had, I think, too. So at that point, I was also like, oh, this is going to be my wife, so we'll figure it out. And so we just were like, we're going to keep them and have them. And it's best idea. He's the best. He's amazing School dude. But it was definitely terrifying. And I understand those moments when as a guy, you're just like, well, maybe I should just run away, you know? But I also knew that the times were like, there'd be pictures I'd see in my house, my mom and, like, two dudes, and I'd be like, I think this one's my dad.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah, I don't want that. For this.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

For this child.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah, exactly. I wouldn't know. And you'd be like, no, that's my friend Anton.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. Somehow I feel like your mom would have given you a stern talking to. Yeah. You run.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, but again, and. And that's also. She would have. And when I told her I was thinking about separating from my second wife, I thought in my son was in six months, I thought she was going to be like, you got this baby. You stick together. You guys gotta figure this out. She was the exact opposite.

[Ego Wodem]

She was like, get out of there. Did she not like her?

[Ron Funches]

She did at first. First. But then I think she started to see it before I saw it.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay, got it. And sometimes you gotta let people have their own journey. So when you finally did, she's like, I've been waiting for you to say something.

[Ron Funches]

Oh, a lot of my friends are like that.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh, wow. That, by the way, say something. You see something, say something. TSA rules. But I also feel like friend in a crappy relationship rule. Yeah, I do.

[Apollo Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

And I understand how delicate it is because if they stay together, you don't want to be like, oh, damn it. I said to my friend, this person sucks. But if you actually think your friend is in. I want to be like, emotional danger. Yeah. But, like, emotional danger. You should say something.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah. You're right. And I think. Yeah, I agree with you. And I. If my mom had saw before we got married, I think she would have.

[Ego Wodem]

Sure, sure.

[Ron Funches]

But at that point, she was fully in love with her.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Ron Funches]

This is my daughter.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Ron Funches]

And I do have friends like that. One of my friends, Tiny Randy, who is now Ted Sarandos assistant. So I'm a pipeline. Used to be my assistant. Now she's Ted Sarande. And she was like, I don't like her.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. Really?

[iHeartRadio Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

Respect.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

And how long after she said that did you start to feel like I don't like her either?

[Ron Funches]

A couple years. Years. Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

So when she said, I don't like her. But you stayed in it for years. In those years, was it anything. Any interactions with her awkward, or were you like, I don't want to. No.

[Ron Funches]

I mean, we were like, you know, she used to work for me, and then she moved, so there was a natural disconnection anyway, and. But I respected it. And she had had some terrible relationships and made some terrible choices, so I was kind of like, well, I can't really trust yours.

[Ego Wodem]

You're like, actually, let me. How about this? Dick. Yeah.

[Ron Funches]

But it was a thing where you're like, oh, she knows. Because she'd been through.

[Ego Wodem]

Yes. She sees. She knows.

[Ron Funches]

And now when I see her, you know, we're closer than ever. Because I'm like, thank you for being one of the few people who told me from the get go.

[Ego Wodem]

I know. I feel like in my life, I just really love and have a deep appreciation for the people who've been, like, said something. And some friends haven't said anything, but it's in their vibe. Like, I can be like. I can see that. I'm like, you don't support this. Don't like this person for me. I can sense you are trying to be cordial. So you've never said anything, but I'm picking up the vibes. And then I'm like, I'm just not gonna address the vibe until I'm ready to get out of this thing, you know? Yeah. But I respect her for saying something too. I'm like, don't like her. Damn. That's a. Of course. Of course she's gonna go on. She's gonna go on to run Netflix one day. That's my vote.

[Ron Funches]

I hope so. I just bet.

[Ego Wodem]

I just bet. Well, this has been very nice. But. Anyway, so I want. I want to be in charge of some people. Okay. And it sounds like you're in charge of people.

[Ron Funches]

Okay.

[Ego Wodem]

Children.

[Ron Funches]

Couple.

[Ego Wodem]

Couple Children.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

But also professionally.

[Ron Funches]

All right.

[Ego Wodem]

Right.

[Ron Funches]

A couple employees.

[Ego Wodem]

A couple employees, yeah. How do you. How do you approach being a leader? What is your advice for someone who wants to be a leader? This is for me.

[Ron Funches]

I would say. Again, another great question. You're good at this podcast.

[Ego Wodem]

Yes.

[Ron Funches]

It's something I struggle with for a while. I even write jokes about how I didn't want to be a leader, especially when, you know, I used to be, like, 370 pounds, a bunch of weight, and people would be like, you're an inspiration. I'd be like, I don't want to be anything.

[Ego Wodem]

I don't want that. I don't wait a leader.

[Ron Funches]

I don't want to be inspiration. And I had to learn to embrace it, that I'm naturally good at it. And it's something that I think that you have to be okay with being like, they're not. Leaders aren't necessarily born. You grow into it. And so for me, the best thing I try to do with any of the people I do is trust them and be like, I hired you because I trust you and I believe you. And I just try to put them in a position to do their best work and then just let them do it. Like my assistant, Like, I just try to. I think I'm a good boss because I try to just be like, look, I know being an assistant, you literally doing all the things I don't want to do, right? And so I. And I've had a couple. I've had, I think, one of my fourth assistant. So I'm always like, okay, it takes about two years. They tend to burn out, and then they go. And so I was like, I'm gonna try my Haley, who I love now. I was like, I want to try to keep her as long as possible. And so her old job is just, like, just get these things done. I don't care where you are. I don't care what you got to do. I don't care if you need to leave town for a few days to go visit family. As long as these things get done when I need them done, then that's fine. And so. And I think that's helped our relationship. So she can go off, visit family. She can go to Paris. Like, that's one of my greatest things, is to be as, like, as a boss. My assistant goes to Paris on vacation.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. Come on. That's my big grand. I have a trust fund baby, two of them, Couple Nepo babies, and my assistant goes to Paris. How's that? Successful. I love that and how do you. How do you discern who you think might be a good fit? Because obviously it's a little bit like dating. And so you say you trust them. Okay. But to trust them you have to sort of believe in them to begin with. So what is sussing it? Sussing out the right people look like for you?

[Ron Funches]

You just kind of watch them. There's a lot of it. I mean and I hate to say it, but I hire a lot vibe based on one of the vibes when I. What I think we'd get along is people what my job. You know, I'm. I'm not the typical boss. So sometimes like what would work with someone else doesn't work for. For. For my job. Because I need someone who's a real self motivator. I'm not always going to be able to be like, I need you to do this, this and this. There's a routine that comes in within my month and you need to get a handle of that routine and then go from there. But it's basically, you know, I've had to. Don't be afraid to fire people. I fire people.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Ron Funches]

I had this lady to be my assistant before Haley.

[Ego Wodem]

Say her name. Don't say her name.

[Ron Funches]

But I know she was in her late 60s.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Ron Funches]

And I just. Part of me was like, how fun and cool will this be? So many comedians or people entertainment. They always want to hire some 20 year old hot assistant that's going to end up ruining their marriage. I'm going the other way. I'm hiring a late 60s lady coming out of retiree and then. But her first job was to just post some things on my Instagram. Somehow.

[Ego Wodem]

Somehow I do think it's funny that you picked an elder to post on your Instagram.

[Ron Funches]

I may have made a mistake because the first thing she posted was just a video of herself singing to a parakeet as the parakeet saying back to her. And I was like, why is this on my page?

[Ego Wodem]

How long was it ever before you.

[Ron Funches]

Go for a couple hours. And so then we had to be like. And I just like we gotta let you go. Like if you can't give. I understand even not getting the post right, but how did your personal video end up on my page?

[Ego Wodem]

My gosh. Legend Franklin.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah, true legend. Really funny. But she lasted 24 hours.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh my gosh. What was. Wait, what was the conversation? Firing. What did you say? That is crazy.

[Ron Funches]

Oh, I let my manager fire you.

[Ego Wodem]

Did your. I'm not doing.

[Ron Funches]

You think I definitely nothing.

[Ego Wodem]

You Said, when I've had to fire. When I say I've had to fire.

[Ron Funches]

I just say, let's fire her, please.

[Ego Wodem]

And you're making the call.

[Ron Funches]

You tell her.

[Ego Wodem]

I just started letting my manager do that because I usually am like, the Baltimore in me, the person who's like, integrity, and I want to be able to face people and I want to be able to say that I have a code. I've been like, I will do the firing. I will have the conversation. And then I realized I'm like, this is too much emotional labor for someone who is. Who has effed up so much that they're getting fired, which was also labor to deal with the f ups. So I go, manager, you do it. Actually, that's the point also, because I didn't realize that's what other people were doing. I'm like, damn, I have to have a lot of conversations. Not that I'm firing a lot of people, but I'm like, damn, I don't feel like having this conversation. I have a million things going on. Yeah. And then I was like, wait.

[Ron Funches]

I try never to be phony. I'm never like. I'm never like, yeah, I'm gonna do it. Yeah. And then my manager says, no. Yeah, I don't try to do that. But, like, there are just. There's also just ways of professionalism.

[Ryan Seacrest]

A.

[Ron Funches]

If you're asking for a request, you probably should. You should have gone through my manager. Why are you coming directly to me? You're coming directly to me because, you know, this is something that's a favor that I shouldn't be doing.

[Ego Wodem]

Yes. Oh, and that's facts.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

That's true strategizing. They are. To get a yes. Do you ever engage with those direct asks?

[Ron Funches]

Not anymore. That's the thing. I do. If you're. But that's also. A couple of them were my friends that I, like, had a long term relationship with. And then when I got divorced, they shifted over to that side and I was just like, wow, this is crazy. You're the same people. You calling me to pitch a idea, but you want to go switching sides. Switch sides. Up.

[Ego Wodem]

Switching sides.

[Ron Funches]

And so I just, again, it was just another valuable lesson of, like, no. Anything that's coming through real will come through her.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah, fair enough. I love that boundary. I did just want to ask you out of apropos of almost nothing, but there's maybe a little through line. Kendrick or Drake. I was listening to you. I was like, oh, I want to.

[Ron Funches]

Know where he stands on that's such a weird question.

[Ego Wodem]

It doesn't have to be one or the other. Is that what you're gonna say?

[Ron Funches]

I mean, I just feel like I don't consider them the same.

[Ego Wodem]

Apples. Orange.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah, I don't. Not even. Like, they're just two different modes. Like, you listen to Kendrick when you were like, oh, I'm on the bus. Or like, I'm on the bus. Yeah, Kendrick's a real bus ride. You tell me that's not a bus riding motherfucker on your psychology class in uc.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay, okay. Bus.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah. And then Drake is like, when you just like. Not popcorn. That's just popcorn. You know, that's movie theater.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Ron Funches]

Both are fine. Club going up on a Tuesday. I will still play. I'm just. I like Makonnen.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Ron Funches]

I'm a big music guy. I love all types of music. So I'm never going to just be like Kendrick or Drake, but I don't like either of them that terribly.

[Ego Wodem]

You heard it here first. He said, fuck both of them. Both of y'. All.

[Ron Funches]

Kendrick's a genius, though.

[Ego Wodem]

Kendrick is a genius. That super bowl performance, my gosh, I. I still watch it from time to time for my health.

[Ron Funches]

It's just sometimes I just be like this too schizophrenic. I can't hear. I can't hear more than two voices on one track from the same person.

[Ego Wodem]

I like that. But that's okay.

[Ron Funches]

That's okay.

[Ego Wodem]

And we don't have to like the same things, Ron. And that's what I keep trying to tell. I keep trying to tell you that I'll get it.

[Ron Funches]

I'll get it one day.

[Ego Wodem]

Well, it's not all about me. We have to help a listener of this podcast. Okay, so, Kevin, we're ready for you. Play that track.

[Ron Funches]

The question I have is a very serious question for myself because of where I find myself at this time in my life.

[Ego Wodem]

It's giving Kendrick vibes.

[Ron Funches]

What do I do when I can't find any Haagen Dazs chocolate swirl? Vanilla.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay, hold on. No, let me. Let me get serious. I'm gonna defer to you on this.

[Ron Funches]

Sure. What do you do when you can't find any Haagen Dazs chocolate swirl with vanilla? First of all, up your ice cream game.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay.

[Ron Funches]

The fact that that's your go to says you a real basic bitch in the get go, like, that's what you want. I understand the chocolate vanilla swirl, that's the classic. I get that. But at that point, at least I want it from some type of mom and pop place where I'm getting an actual Sals serve or a CVT out here in la. But to just get to the point where Haagen Dazs chocolate swirl being out ruins your life. Try fish food, motherfucker.

[iHeartRadio Advertiser]

I don't know.

[Ron Funches]

Have you heard of Ben and Jerry's? Have you had a Magnum bar?

[Ego Wodem]

Jenny's?

[Ron Funches]

You eat a Choco Taco in your life.

[Ego Wodem]

A Choco Taco. They tried to cancel Choco Taco.

[Ron Funches]

They tried it, but it was too strong. Too strong.

[Ego Wodem]

And it was. Cause I took to the Internet. Talk about standing for something. I took to the Internet. I was like, y' all better fucking not.

[Ron Funches]

You can man the way I used to eat a Choco Taco every time.

[Ego Wodem]

School lunch.

[Ron Funches]

Mm.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah. Step your game up.

[Ron Funches]

Nothing into Selena eating the Choco Taco.

[Ego Wodem]

Those were the days. So that's what you do? That's your advice?

[Ron Funches]

I will find another ice cream. There's so many different types. Go find a local establishment that you can give some of your money to in the community. Haagen Dazs isn't gonna do nothing for you.

[Ego Wodem]

But Ben and Jerry. Ben and Jerry.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah.

[Ego Wodem]

Is it Ben Talente and the cute little plastic? Yeah. Here's the crazy thing is I don't really. With ice cream twist.

[Ron Funches]

Oh, that's why you passed it all.

[Ego Wodem]

Yeah.

[Ron Funches]

I said I did not know. I didn't know there was a hatred.

[Ego Wodem]

It's usually kind of weak to me. I feel about ice cream the way I feel about breakfast. A weak link. I don't know what we're celebrating, but.

[Ron Funches]

I feel that about donuts.

[Ego Wodem]

Okay. I think I could get behind this. Have you ever had Holy Grail, though? On Larchma? I need you to go on your way after or before Pilates.

[Ron Funches]

Okay.

[Ego Wodem]

I need you to go get a Holy Grail donut. Legit.

[Ron Funches]

Most donuts don't do nothing much.

[Ego Wodem]

Understood? Understood. I want you to have a Holy Grail. We'll have you back on the podcast. We'll talk about how you felt about it.

[Ron Funches]

Okay?

[Ego Wodem]

Made to order. I need you to hear me on this. And I'm also not a donut girl. Like, I'm cake. I'm cake all day. How do you feel about cake?

[Ron Funches]

Cake to me is like, love me, love me, love me. I'm coming at you with sugar and icing and frosting. Love me so much. I'm cake. Cake. Like, get your shit together, cake. Have some self respect for yourself.

[Ego Wodem]

Oh, my gosh.

[Ron Funches]

Cake be like, A pie or a cobbler. That and pie. Cobblers. Like, I'm sweet on the inside. I don't have to show you. I don't have to show you on the outside. There's just regular crust out here. But on the inside is where delicious is. Cake is like, look at me. I got sprinkles all over my body.

[Ego Wodem]

No, no. For me, pie is like, oh. Oh. To get good, I gotta be somebody else on the inside.

[Ron Funches]

What?

[Ego Wodem]

I'm fruit. I'm fruit. Fruit is its own food. Why are you in here? That's what I want to know. Pie. Pie. The only good thing about a pie is what's on the outside. Surface level. Acquaintance, initial conversation. Pie. The crust. Liar.

[Ron Funches]

Cake will be like, oh, look at me, I'm red velvet. It's like, you steal chocolate. Okay.

[Ego Wodem]

And you know what? That's my steel chocolate with a little red dye.

[Ron Funches]

Yeah. You ain't. No. You just lying to yourself. You put on a little mini skirt on. Think you done changed up.

[Ego Wodem]

No, but I know. Oh, no. A cobbler is. I need something else to be myself. I need something else in order to be myself. I'm not gonna be on it. Best thing about cobbler. Best thing about pie. The outside. The cobbler. The baked part. Yeah.

[Ron Funches]

Look at the crumble.

[Ego Wodem]

Parts. The crumble. Okay. And honestly, derivative of cake. And I rest my case, you, Honor, it's been wonderful. It's been wonderful having you, Ron Funches. Love you, buddy.

[Ron Funches]

Thanks for answering.

[Ego Wodem]

Wow. So you just listened to that whole conversation with Ron Funches, and he did, in fact, as promised, say something about Drake and show me you listen. Show me a real one by commenting below what he said about Drake. That's how I'll know. And the first hundred of you to comment what he said about Drake will be among the first hundred to comment what he said about Drake. The prizes in the task. Thank you so much. Does that make any sense? I think it does. Love you guys. If you want advice from me and my next guest, you're gonna have to call us. Hit our hotline bling. Right? You like how. You like how I did that there? Hit the hotline bling. You used to call me on my cell phone. This isn't my cell phone, but it is a phone number. It is 502, which I believe is a Kentucky area code. Why do I know that? I know area codes. I've said this on podcasts. I just weirdly know area codes off the top of the dome. It's very weird. But 502 Kentucky 849-3237 or 502. Thanks THX dads. Multiple of them. Multiple dads, daddies, zaddies. A harem of dads. You get it? Anyway, call and get advice from me and my guests. I love you. Truly. Thank you for listening. I really do love you. And if. Nevermind. I was gonna steal something from Mel Robbins, but I won't. If no one else tells you today, I love you, cut that out. Okay, bye. Thanks. Dad is a production of Will Ferrell's Big Money Players and I Heart Podcast. I'm your host, Ego Wodem. Our producer is Kevin Bartelt and our executive producer is Matt Apodaca.

[TJ Maxx Advertiser]

Okay, only 10 more presents to wrap. You're almost at the finish line. But first, There the last one. Enjoy a Coca Cola for a pause that refreshes.

[Ron Funches]

ABC Wednesday, it's the CMA Awards live.

[Ego Wodem]

That's what I'm talking about.

[Ron Funches]

With performances by Lainey Wilson, Kelsey Ballerini, Zach Topp, Brian Le Green, Ella Langley, Kenny Chesney, Megan Maroney, Brandi Carlisle and.

[Ego Wodem]

The hottest collabs, Miranda Lambert and Chris.

[Ron Funches]

Stapleton, Jabuzzi and Stephen Wilson Jr. Big.

[Ego Wodem]

X the Plug featuring Luke Combs.

[Ron Funches]

It's country music's biggest night hosted by.

[Shopify Advertiser]

Your girl, lainey Wilson.

[Ryan Seacrest]

The CMA Wednesday, 8, 7 Central on.

[Ron Funches]

ABC and next day on Hulu.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Flu season is here and our pharmacies have you covered with a free flu shot with most insurance plans. Plus it's cough and cold season and now through December 2nd. Stock up on all the season's essentials and get ready for release with discounts on items like Mucinex Cold and flu Kickstart, Mucinex, Fast Max products, Vicks, Dayquil and Nyquil Combo pack. Alka Select. Also Airborne and afrin offers end December 2nd. Restrictions apply and offers may vary by location. Visit Albertsons or Safeway.com for more details.

[Apollo Advertiser]

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[Ron Funches]

Thursday Night Football is on and it's only on Prime Video. That is unbelievable. This week the Bills stampede into Houston to meet the Texans in a showdown under the lights. Are you kidding me with this catch? Coverage begins at 7pm Eastern with football's best party, TNF tonight presented by Verizon. Not a Prime member?

[Ryan Seacrest]

Not a problem.

[Ron Funches]

Simply sign up for a 30 day free trial. It's the Bills and the Texans, Thursday at 7pm Eastern only on Prime Video. Restrictions apply. See Amazon.com amazonprime for details.

[Ego Wodem]

This is an iHeart podcast.