← The 1000 Hours Outside Podcast
The 1000 Hours Outside Podcast
1KHO 415: Sit Boldly in the Season That You're In | Anthony O'Neal, Take Your Seat at the Table
00:44:50
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- [00:00]
A
All right. Welcome to the 1000 Hours Outside podcast. My name is Jenny Urchin. I just read an amazing book by Anthony O'Neill, number one best selling author called take your seat at the table. Live an authentic life of abundance, wellness and freedom. Also have his super cool entrepreneurship kit for teens. Wonderful. You are so accomplished. You've got your YouTube, got a top 200 podcasts. What an honor. Anthony, thanks for being here.
- [00:24]
B
Oh, no, thank you so much, sis, for having me on the show. I was literally rushing in traffic just to make sure I made it here in time just for you. So we're going to have a good conversation.
- [00:36]
A
So this is a book about having a seat at the table. And I really related, I mean, I related because I like, I'm going to be super honest, I feel a lot of times like I haven't had one. So you start off by giving this story of you're a youth pastor and you're going in for this meeting and you're doing big things. Like I think working with our kids is one of the most important things that we could be doing. And you go into this meeting, it's like a church meeting and there's this whole table set out and there's no chair for you. So I would love to start off with just this is a universal problem, not for everyone, but for some, including me, where when you don't feel like you have a seat at the table, what are you supposed to do?
- [01:16]
B
Yeah, so if we, if we reach. Rewind to the beginning of that story, man. It was a youth pastor. It was a meeting designed specifically for, for me. We were putting together a big youth conference, one of the first conferen this church has ever put on at, at that particular time. And so I was supposed to be leading the meeting. Well, when I walked into the meeting, it wasn't that a chair wasn't available for me, it was that it was that I didn't feel worthy to sit at the table because at the table was the senior pastor, the, the assistant pastor, the secretaries, other elders. And I'm like, hey, I'm just a youth guy. And so I naturally just stepped back and sat on the side, stood on the side and presented my case. When I should have took a seat at that table and presented what the whole meeting was about. It was about the youth organization. And so at that time, that was my table to sit at. And I wonder how many of us build something amazing in life but we don't know that we actually have ownership of that. We honestly give ownership to Someone else that we don't feel worthy to sit at a table. We don't feel like our lives are worthy, worthy to be connected to other people. And so I, I, when I think of that story, I'm like, man, like, no, I should have sat at that table. Like, man, that was my life. That was my opportunity. That was, that was for me. And so this whole concept of the table is, is, is the analogy that it compares to is your life. Your table symbolizes your life. And it's time for you to take control and reign of your life. Because if you don't, then you're going to live the rest life being controlled by other people, by bankers, by bosses, by friends, by culture, by society, by parents, by people who really don't know your assignment, who really don't know your purpose. And I said, I just refuse to go into 2025 or 2024 when I wrote this book with this information on the inside of me. And I want to help people really start taking control of their lives, whether they have a job, entrepreneurship, a mother, father. I just want to help you take a seat at your table.
- [03:36]
A
So if you were to go back in time, Anthony, knowing what you know now, and you were to walk back into that same room, because one of the phrases you used was, I'm just a youth pastor. And I felt like that in my life, like I'm just a mom or I'm interviewing all these people and they're a doctor, and I've got a degree, but it's not a doctorate. So I, I definitely am. I'm just a. A lot of times, and I don't know, in some cases, it sort of feels like that, you know, like the. I'm just a youth pastor. It sort of feels that, well, I'm not the senior pastor. I'm associate pastor. I'm not an elder. If you were to go back in timing and knowing what you know now, how would you approach that differently?
- [04:12]
B
I would say you are a youth pastor. You're not just a youth pastor, if that makes sense. So, yes, you are a youth pastor, but you were fearfully and wonderfully made. God took his time to knit you in your mother's womb, Anthony. And so there is a season before, a season before, another season, that this is all a part of a journey. This is all a part of your journey, and you got to walk boldly in who you are and don't be ashamed of the season that you're in. Because everybody was at that just stage of life, right? We were all at the beginning stages of life, I haven't always had a huge YouTube show. I haven't always had 2 million followers following me. But at this season, there's people who have 5 million, 20 million people following them. And, and 5 million 10 million and 20 million dollar a year businesses. And so I would never, I would go back and say, you know, I'm taking a seat at this table. And yes, I'm going to be respectful to the senior pastor. I'm going to be respectful to the other elders sitting at the board. I'm going to be respectful other people sitting at this table because you all are here to help me put on a good conference for young people. And I am called to lead this conference with the, the wisdom and the knowledge from the senior pastor of this church. But he hired me to run this. So I'm going to sit boldly in the season that I'm in. I'm going to sit boldly in season that God has me in my life. Whether that is I'm a 9 to 5 worker. Whether it is I'm a stay at home mom. Whether that is I am a part time worker with a part time business. Whether that is I'm in school full time. I'm going to sit boldly in this season. I'm about to preach. I better stop. But I'mma sit boldly in this season.
- [05:55]
A
I can drop some amens. Go for it.
- [05:57]
B
You know, But I just think we can't walk around with our head down and feeling like, oh, I'm just, I'm just Anthony. I'm just Gigi. I'm just, I don't know, I'm just Rebecca. I'm just Anthony. I don't know. We know. My name is Anthony Bernard O'Neill Jr and some call me AO. You can choose which one you want to call me. But you got to put some respect on my name and you have to have to put some respect on the life that I'm called to live.
- [06:23]
A
That's good. Okay, so here's the situation. I have had a couple of the Dave Ramsey personalities on my show. John Deloney. Love him. And Dr. John and Rachel and Jade and Ken. I've had a lot of them on.
- [06:38]
B
You had everyone on except for one, it seems like just George. Have you had George on?
- [06:41]
A
Not George. So I guess I have to.
- [06:43]
B
That's the only one you missed.
- [06:44]
A
And Dave. Yeah, the main, the main one. All right, so they've been on my show and then my husband reached out and was like, well, you should have her on your show. And I was like, they're probably gonna say no. But then they said yes. And so I went down there. We're in Michigan. I went down to Nashville and I got to interview with John and Rachel. And it was exceptional, Anthony. It was like they had lighting people and the. The thing that clips and you're like. And they're like checking the color correction. And there's like four staff member just for this one show. And I'm like sitting in my room by myself with no one. And I was kind of like, this would be the pinnacle of life. You know, I'm like, if I had all these people that were like, you know, helping out and getting it going. And then I read your book and you hit the pinnacle and you quit. I was like, that's so great. Tell me why you quit, man.
- [07:33]
B
I wouldn't say I quit because, I mean, working with Dave Ramsey in that amazing organization, especially all the names you name from Dr. John, Rachel Cruz, you mentioned Ken, and of course the legend himself, the guru, Dave Ramsey. And as you can see, I mentioned him in the book. Who is the guru of guru when it comes to finances. I think for me, when I think about my life and taking a seat at the head of my table, God called me for a specific purpose. And that specific purpose was to specifically help people of color in the less fortunate communities. And while I was doing that a little bit with Ramsey solutions, I wanted to go a little bit harder. But that wasn't aligned with the actual vision of, you know, the organization. Dave and the board at that time, and they were super supportive of it. It was like, hey, Anthony has a passion for this community. Let's support him in doing that. Because that's not. We don't want to just focus solely on these particular. A group of people. And it's not that I wanted to solely focus on one particular group of people because if that was the case, I wouldn't be on this podcast. Right. But it's. I wanted to have. Make sure that my content resonated with them at a good way, that it doesn't alienate me from other organizations. And that's why I left, you know, and it was a mutual understanding between Dave and I, and I love that organization. I've been back a few times since I left. I've had John on my show, just had George Campbell on my show a couple of. Couple of months ago. Can't wait to have Jade, done some great stuff with all of them since I've been gone. So it's A beautiful organization.
- [09:09]
A
One of the things that you talked about was that you were building someone else's legacy. And it was a question that someone asked you that was like one that. It's a big question that stops you in your tracks. It actually really helped me, Anthony, because like, sometimes, and maybe a lot of times you look at something that's already established and wish you were a part of it. That's kind of like how I felt like this is something that's already established. There's a lot of foundation here. There's a lot of support that I don't have because I'm just by myself. And so I thought it was a story that really gave me bravery and it gave me a different perspective to look at my own situation and think, oh, well, maybe this isn't worse or lesser than because I am building my own legacy or the legacy for my family and for my kids. You wrote I was pouring myself out to build someone else's table. You know, so you walk away. You walk away from a salary. You walk away from something that's already established. You walk away from a recognizable name. Has it been what you hoped it would be?
- [10:11]
B
You know, it's becoming what I hoped it would be. It is, I think, for me. Have I reached what I saw in my head, in my vision? No. But I definitely do see that it's becoming. You know, a lot of people think I'm talking about I left one particular organization, which is Ramsey. But no, literally, I left what was comfortable, period. You know, before Ramsey, I was in the church world. Before church world, I was in a corporate America. Being out on my own now, man, it's been so refreshing to see that the impact that I'm having is producing income for myself. That income is now producing a legacy for my family down the road. And I think that I talk about this in a book. This book is not for people who just want to be entrepreneurs. Because you can have a seat at your own table. You can be in control of your life by working a 9 to 5 job. I use the analogy of Michael Jordan would not have been Michael Jordan without Scottie Pippen. We all know that Michael Jordan was a baller on his own. He was dropping 30, 40, 50 points when he first came out. If you all know anything about sports, but he never won championships. It wasn't until he got surrounded with a Scottie Pippen. It wasn't until he got surrounded with the Dennis Rodman people who knew their roles as the second man, the third man, to help facilitate the entire team to win a championship that Michael Jordan became Michael Jordan and won all those championships. And so everyone needs a solid two man. And I believe that God fearfully makes solid two men and women like you are designed to go to the job and to be the best secretary, to be the best vice president, be the best supervisor. But there are people who are in supervisor roles who should be entrepreneurs like you and I. And I think we wrestle with that sometimes and I wrestle with it for a long time. But man, being out on my own, just being able to like, like you said, to go from four to five people to now I'm in my home office now interviewing with you, one light above me, one mic above me, one camera right here, my computer right here.
- [12:27]
A
Nobody did color correction, nobody did a little click thing like a director. Yeah.
- [12:33]
B
And. And I love all that. Right. I mean, I think it's needed and, and that, and I have that for my actual show. But when I'm doing interviews like this, man, I just love to pop on and just come on here natural and. Because I believe it is needed. But what I also believe, and this is why I say take a seat at the head of your table and really watch who's at your table. Never judge your table, AKA your life, to someone else's table in life because comparison could delay you from getting to where you really need to be. I believe that who I'm called to is different from who a George Camel in money space is called to, who a Dave Ramsey is called to in the money space, who you're called to in the money space, who you're called to and who you can reach is going to be different from who I'm called to and who I can reach. And God fearfully made you and, and everyone listening for an assignment to reach different people. So ultimately, as a Christian, what I believe is that I can use money to get them to Christ. And so there are going to be certain things that I'm going to be able to say that a Dave Ramsey that a Mark Cuban that whomever just can't say and relate to. And I don't, I don't have a problem with them at all. I root for them. But I think for me, if I try to be somebody else, I can never reach the people who I'm called to reach. I can never, I would never feel fulfilled. And so I'm just excited just to be out on my own. But I think, I think, man, well, I haven't seen it just yet, to be honest. It's still a beautiful life though, and I love what we're building, I love the lives that we're impacting and I love what we've accomplished. But the journey is still going and I can't wait to see where it ends. When it comes to my ending, not when it ended the company. Because I'm gonna pass this company on somebody and they're gonna keep this message going.
- [14:24]
C
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- [15:54]
D
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- [16:53]
A
You got a book about debt free degrees? Is that what it's called?
- [16:57]
B
Yes, ma'am. So my last book with a rant with Ramsey Press, I would say was Debt free degrees.
- [17:02]
A
And you also have this entrepreneurship toolbox. What drew me to learning more about you and reading your book and what you have to offer is this is like a random transition, but we're trying to get our kids outside. And really what we're trying to do, Anthony, is to not shortchange childhood. And really not to shortchange our life at all, but not to shortchange because we have this end goal for our kids. Like, childhood shouldn't necessarily just be some resume for college, which, you know, it becomes this like, you know, 30 year and then you retire. And you know that that's the whole rigmarole. And I like that you have a lot of things that are for entrepreneurs, because I think that if there are a lot of options for a child as they enter into adulthood, then you have a lot more options of how to structure that childhood, if that makes sense. So you talk a lot about ownership. Ownership brings freedom, Ownership brings security. And one of the things that you said that was so good and I didn't realize because we've been entrepreneurs for just a couple years, so this is new. And I remember it was two years ago that my husband, we like, had a plan for like, how we've got five kids, so it's like they're kind of expensive, you know, right? Like they're playing basketball. I'm like, these shoes are a lot of money. Like, I mean, they have. They all have to go to the dentist. I'm like, this is a lot of money. So we had this plan, Anthony. It was like, well, how are we going to make money in 2023? Okay, we got a plan. Well, what about 2024? Well, what about 2025? And I remember having these conversations and what you say is, opportunities will arise that otherwise might never have materialized. And I was like, oh, I have actually really seen that in our life. Like, you, you can't actually predict out necessarily because stuff's going to come up that you didn't know about. So can you talk about. That's really hope filled. I think like the people are considering making a change in their life or even leading their K entrepreneurship or maybe their kids. We've got friends whose kids are like, they've got a tree trimming business already. You know, they're in college or they're detailing cars and boats and stuff like that. It's like, but they might be scared, but you just don't know what's going to come.
- [19:09]
B
No, I, I totally agree with that. I think that when. Let's talk about the kids perspective. Right? Rachel Cruz says something that is so good that more is caught than taught. Growing up, I was taught if I make up my bed, then I'll get paid. So I made up my bed and I got an allowance every single Friday. It's like 10 bucks. My dad gave me $10 for simply making up my bed and keeping the room clean. And when I got older, I had this sense of yo, the fact that I'm just here, I should get something because I was taught this. No one taught me the power of entrepreneurship. No one taught me the importance of working until I had to go to work to help provide for my family. But no one taught me like, hey, you can go exchange time and they exchange for time. You don't get a paycheck back. But what I want you to do with that paycheck is give 10% to God. They told me that. But then the other 90%, hey, just, just make sure you have some until your next check. But no one taught me to take that money and to flip it and invest it and maybe start a business. I was taught go to school, get a good education. Hey, if you make up your bed, we'll give you $10. I had this self entitlement mindset going into the real world. And so I think that when it comes to kids, which is why I think the importance of the teen entrepreneurship toolbox is so important is because earlier on we're teaching them, hey, listen, how do you get a. If you like cutting grass at home, okay, I'm not going to pay you to cut our grass because you live here, but you can go cut John's grass across the street and charge him 25 to cut the grass. And you know what, while you're there, go next door to Tim's house, ask him if you, if you, if you can cut his house now you just made $50. Wait a minute. That's how life works, is when you exchange your time for money. Now, when we start teaching them that, then you come back and teach them the power of how do you open up an llc? How do you do proper tax write offs, how do you structure your business? How do you have a business card? How do you do some level of marketing? Now, when they graduate high school, they've been taught the real world because, let's be Honest, you have five kids who are in school right now. 50% of what they learned in the classrooms when they graduate high school, they will not use that and apply that in the real world.
- [21:41]
A
Good thing we homeschool, which is why.
- [21:43]
B
I get so bothered that financial literacy is not taught and mandatory inside of high schools. Because you're teaching me how to read, write, process information and add. But you're doing all that so I can get a job and contribute to the economy. But what is the purpose of a job? A check. So you're teaching me how to get the job. You're not teaching me what to do with the resources the job gives me. So the Teenage Entrepreneurship Toolbox Kit is so important. And this is why, taking a seat at the head of your table, because watch this. As parents, you say, you just said that you're homeschooling the kids. Well, if you are not sitting at the head of your life, if you don't have control of your life, you would not be able to have homeschool as an option for your kids because you will have bosses, you will have bill collectors, you will have collectors telling you, hey, you need to get two jobs. You ain't got time to stay at home and be a stay at home mom. And you don't got time to do all this trying to be an entrepreneur. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. You've kicked them out of your life, you kicked them off of your table. Now you've positioned yourself to where you can invite maybe helpers with your homeschooling. Because if I'm not mistaken, correct me if I'm wrong, when I was homeschooled, we still, there still was some. Something above us that checked to make sure that our kids were doing well. And so I think for us, if we could really, really start teaching entrepreneurship, not to force them into entrepreneurship, but the skills that come with learning entrepreneurship can translate onto a job, it can translate into college, it could translate into the real world. And so that's why I think that is so important to really start teaching ownership to kids and even specifically to people of color. If you have some that listen to your show is. Is we have to start. We can't close the wealth gap. Because here's the argument that I have with that. You know, everyone says, well, we got to close the wealth gap. Well, then that means that my white brothers and sisters have to stop making money for us to close the wealth gap. I don't want them to do that. And no one wants to stop making money. What we can do is close the wealth gap, and we close that by teaching entrepreneurship, by giving a level of ownership inside of our African American communities. So this way, as our white brothers and sisters and other. Other Asian brothers and sisters are winning, we can also start teaching the skill sets, and we can win as well, and we can narrow that wealth gap and we can help see more wealth and more legacy built within all of our communities.
- [24:15]
A
Anthony is so good, because really, that is what it's about. It's about ownership. And entrepreneurship would help you to learn about ownership and probably vice versa. But you are absolutely right that we have the agency to be able to say, we're going to homeschool and we're going to live on one income. That's what we did for a long time now. We're going to be entrepreneurs and try and make that work. And we've talked to a lot of people. I speak at conferences around the country about homeschooling, and people say, I can't. And so it's actually built on several layers of decisions that have got us to the point to where we can say, I want to, and also I can. And so that's good. Kids listen in too, Anthony. So they're going to be really inspired by this. I want to talk about this entrepreneurship kit, kids. It is really cool. The books, there's a parent guide and like, a portfolio for the teen is about becoming an entrepreneur, finding your idea, naming your price, building your business, win with customers, get organized, make the most of your money, take the next step. I absolutely agree with you. Like, this should be a part of every high school curriculum. And you go through. It's really laid out, cool, first of all, but you go through. Like, how do you do an invoice? I mean, this is like the practical stuff that could change your life and also teach you. Is that what you would say, Anthony? Like, this is one avenue to teach you how to be the head of your own table.
- [25:40]
B
Yeah, absolutely. I think the entrepreneurship toolbox kit pairs well with the new book. Take your seat at the head of the table. I think. I think if you do that, you gotta buy the toolbox kit. You gotta buy the debt free degree book and you have to definitely buy my latest book. Take your seat at the table. And here's why. Because when you look at all of these things, when you look at all of them, they all pair and work well together, right? If we teach entrepreneurship to them at 10 years old, they're already learning what how to take a seat at the head of their own table, how to take control of their life from day one. And if you could teach that, let's just say they learn invoicing, they learn marketing, they learn being professional, saying yes ma'am, yes sir. Essence that they don't start a business, well, what they learned inside of that being at the head of their own life, now they can go into college, now they can go into jobs, now they can go into meetings with that same skill set that they learn as being an entrepreneurship. Now they go into their job not just as an employee, but Dave causes entrepreneurs. So it's like you are an entrepreneur but your employee as well, right? So like if those are some of the best employees who think like an entrepreneur, they take ownership of their job assignment, but they understand like, hey, this is not mine, but it's theirs. But at the same time, here's what I love. I do believe that everybody should have some level of entrepreneurship. Even if you have a full, full time job, there should be something that you own at home that you and your family, 110% reap the rewards. And a fruit from, do not put all of your eggs into one basket, which is one job, because that employer could let you go. I teach that to my team right now. Like, hey, listen, if anything was to happen in this world, the only responsibility I have have is to do you right. But to take care of me and doing you right simply means I may have to let you go, but I'm gonna give you some, some type of the best severance package that I can give you that I can afford. But my responsibility to live is me and my family. And your responsibility to live and to succeed is your responsibility. So whatever you're doing with this check, when you're off on Fridays, when you're off after 4:00 in the afternoon, yo build for you. Go do something that I cannot touch, but only you and your family can touch. You do that, you'll be successful.
- [28:17]
A
Yeah, that's interesting part. And I thought I didn't know this at all. The content creation industry is expected to generate more than $70 billion in annual revenue by 2030. To put that in perspective, the total revenue for the National Football league for the NFL is about 12 billion in 2022. So content industry is a huge pie that's getting huger. You have the opportunity to get your own slice. You just go through different ideas, different things that people could try. Sometimes people's kids do listen in with them. Anthony, to the podcast. So I would love, if you're comfortable with it, if you would tell. Because here you are, right? You said we've got 2 million followers. You've got this huge YouTube. You've got all of these products. You have a community. You have the debt calculator, the wealth calculator. You do a book of the month club. I don't know if that's exactly what it's called, but right now people are reading Goals by Zig Ziglar.
- [29:08]
B
Yep.
- [29:08]
A
You are leading people in their faith. But at one point, you got kicked out of school.
- [29:14]
B
Yeah. Yeah.
- [29:15]
A
You talk about that.
- [29:17]
B
Yeah. You know, when I say I kicked out of school, man, it was such a. I would say an embarrassing moment. Just really trying to blend in with the kids on campus. Blend in and fit in with the kids on campus. I really just wanted to be the cool kid. It. And, man, I made a dumb decision trying to impress the kids. And it cost me my high school. Unfortunate. I mean, not high school. That was at the time of middle school, my middle school career. And that's when I transitioned into homeschool. And I would definitely say, though, sis, when I say this, I think being homeschooled with my mom for that semester was probably one of the best things that could have happened to me because it taught me how to sit down. But what I tell young people all the time, if I could go back, I would lose half of the friends that I had. And to the young people who are listening right now, I think whenever we go to school, we tend to disobey our parents because we want to. We want to be accepted by the peers. We want to be in a cool club. We want the ladies to like us brothers. And we want the brothers to like you ladies. And it's like, for me, I don't remember. I am not in the same circle today at 40, I maybe talked to maybe two people that I went to school with.
- [30:43]
A
And it's the same for everyone.
- [30:44]
B
So I did all that impressing. I did all that bad stuff to impress people who are not in my life today. And I did a research. I did some research. I went back to middle school. I went back to high school. I said, where are all these people I was trying to impress. And I'm not. I'm not showboating on myself, but I am further along than them, than more than half of them, thankfully, because of God and. And my parents just keeping me on the right track. But I said, man, I was trying to impress you, and you single with seven kids, Lord Jesus, I. I was trying to impress you and like, wow. And I'm not judging nobody, right? But I'm like, man, like, okay, guy, yeah. Let me. Let me focus on my table. Let me focus on my life. Let me get the right people at my table. So that way, when I have kids, they are surrounded by good people, loving people. That's going to help them have a better experience in elementary school, middle school, and high school than I do. But I want to encourage you young people who are listening, listen to your parent. Because if you want to be that millionaire, if you want to be that famous YouTuber, that famous TikToker, man, your parents going to help you get there quicker because they've been there, they've experienced it. They know what it is. There's nothing new that happens up beneath the sun. Now, I may be packaged a little bit differently, for sure, but nothing is new. Everybody in middle school, high school, elementary wants to be the cool person. Everybody wants to be liked. Nobody wants to be disliked. But there is a way you could do it that doesn't jeopardize your future, that doesn't jeopardize your character and your integrity, and doesn't jeopardize your grade. So I would definitely say, listen to your parents.
- [32:30]
A
That's good. How do we rebound when we're in those hard spots to get kicked out of school you talked about in this book? Take your seat at the table for a period of time, you're sleeping in your car. And I think sometimes we get stuck. We get in these spots where things feel destitute and yet you've rebounded. What's your advice for that?
- [32:47]
B
When it comes to rebounding, let me tell you how I rebounded. Not even just from making bad decisions, but sometimes you got a rebound, says from fear. Sometimes you got to rebound from making decisions that you know you needed to make, but it still threw you for a little. And I think for me in this season, when I would tell everyone is to have a clear vision. Every time I am feeling like, okay, wait, what's going on in my life? What's happening? What's going on? Whoa, that just shook me. I always go back to my vision. What is the Vision for my life. Not what is the vision for my company? Not what is the vision or the mission statement that my company has or my boss has? No, no. What is the vision for Anthony Bernard O'Neal? What is the vision for me and my wife? What is vision for you and your husband? What is the vision for you and your family? And how you rebound is you reconnect with that vision. And when you reconnect with that vision, what I want you to do is go back and reassess the system andor strategy that you put in place to get to that vision and to continue working that vision. I have an acronym called for earn. I teach people how to earn more. And they're saying, oh, I want to earn more money. I said, no, this. This is going to help you earn everything. An acronym real quickly is called E. I want you to evaluate where you currently are if you're going to rebound. I need you to evaluate where you currently are financially, where you currently are spiritually, where you currently are mentally, where you currently are as a wife, as a husband, as a. As a mother, as a father. Do some self evaluation and be honest with that evaluation. Then once you evaluate, you go down to a. You're going to arrange the vision for the future. So once you know, okay, this is where I am, okay, next, I need you to arrange. This is where I'm going. Like, I'm going here. And to get here, once you arrange the vision, you got to go down to R. You got to render the strategy. What is the strategy I'm going to put into place to get to the vision? Because I see where I currently am, and I want to change some things and then end is the last thing, which a lot of us don't do. We'll get the vision. We'll even get a strategy. We'll get a strategy from listening to your podcast. We'll get a strategy from listening to Dave Ramsey's seven Baby Steps. What's the most important thing is acting. Now you need to act. That's the end. Now act. So if you act and do the things that you said you're going to do to get to the strat, to get to the vision, you're going to get yourself out of that rut. But I think a lot of times when people get into a rut, people, let's say they lose a job, start a business, let's say the business is not going well. Let's say that you just got married and you're like, whoa, okay, cool. Step back and earn. Earn. More, earn more time, earn more love, earn your husband back, earn your wife back, earn more finances, earn whatever that is you need to earn. And you utilize those four things. It's great. But a lot of people don't do the acting because acting is hard. Doing the doing it is hard. You running this podcast, a lot of people think podcasting is easy. No, it's not. To effectively run a good podcast, you got to sit back. What is the vision of my podcast? Okay. What is the strategy? I'm going to put it in place for this, okay? I got to put, I got to do this. I do the research. You got to read books. You read my book, right? So it's like now to put together a good show, you just can't show up. You gotta do some research, you gotta do some studying, you gotta do some praying. If you're a Christian, you know, you gotta really put some work into it. And man, I'm telling you, I'm always doing, I'm doing it actually right now. On my board behind me is a blackboard that I use all the time. And I'm always writing on a board because I'm okay, I want to do this in 2025. I want to do that. And so that's how you get out. I'm sorry. I could talk for days on that.
- [36:52]
A
No, I know, I know. But you've got, you've got interview after interview because you've got, you've got your book launch in here soon. That room is actually really cool.
- [36:59]
B
Thank you.
- [36:59]
A
Your backd up there. I'm like, oh, that is a nice, nice looking room. You offer things for singles just as we're sort of wrapping up here, because I think that's important to know. Talk about singles season. Can you tell people what you offer? I think I love how you do a really fantastic job of reaching out to specific groups of people. And so singles is one of them. Tell us about that.
- [37:21]
B
Yeah, singles have a dear place in my heart. You know, at 40 years old, who is still single and dating? I, I've, I used to get real tired, I still do, to be honest, of people asking me, why are you still single? And, you know, one of the things that I've never been asked by a married person is, how are you maximizing your single season?
- [37:40]
A
Oh, it's good.
- [37:41]
B
They're in a rush to get me married because as a Christian, I was like, hey, we don't want you to have intimacy before marriage. I totally get it. I respect it, right? But if I rush into marriage without My mind and my spirit healthy and correct. I'm honestly going to end up divorced. I'm going to hurt the woman who you forced me or pressured me into marriage. And so I created single content within the confines of finances and entrepreneurship to help us at least alleviate one. Eliminate one of the things which is finances. Like, there's no reason why I should get married and we should be drowning in all this debt when I don't have any kids. No major responsibility. Responsibilities. It's just me. And I got a black female German shepherd. Right. I got a dog. And so I'm like, I should be able to come to you with a messy table. I talk about that. That's the last chapter in my book. But the messiness is not a distraction to us moving forward. Right. It is still a complete, healthy table. But hey, I've been living for 40 years. There's. I'm not perfect. There's going to be some mess that comes with Anthony O'Neal, and that is okay. And so I want to help singles really steward their single season well. So that way when we do get married, we're not really trying to figure out things as far as on the things that we should have figured out when we got single. And I'll end with this. This is something that I hope married people here on this podcast, the next time you see one of your single friends, don't ask them where the kids, where's your man? Shock them. Hey, how are you? Hey, how are you? How are you maximizing this season that you're in? Are you getting therapy? Are you, Are you working out? Are you eating good? Are you traveling? Are you enjoying the freedom? Like, like, how are you maximizing this season? And have that conversation with them and show me that you care about me as a single person, not me as a potential married person. And once we get there, we'll be all right.
- [39:41]
A
That's good. You offer so much, so much. People can listen to your podcast. You've got your YouTube. All of these resources are phenomenal. They're life changing resources. So. What an honor, Anthony. Thank you so much. I love the book. It's called take your seat at the table. It will be out now when this podcast goes live. Live an authentic life of abundance, wellness and freedom. We always end our show with the same question. What's a favorite memory from your childhood? That was outside.
- [40:06]
B
Oh, man. Outside Six Flags Magic Mountain. We went there every single summer. And as soon as we got there, I would run and get a funnel cake with cherry and strawberries on top of it, and it was so good. And believe it or not, I just moved to Maryland, and they have a Six Flags here. So when it gets warm again, I'm going to Six Flags.
- [40:28]
A
I love it. I love it. Thank you so much for being here.
- [40:30]
B
Thank you so much.