← The 1000 Hours Outside Podcast
The 1000 Hours Outside Podcast
1KHO 724: The Long Game of Youth Sports | Britt Lee, Parenting the Pure Athlete
00:47:05
Loading summary
Transcript92 lines
- [00:01]
Quaker Oats Advertiser
You know, you need fiber for a healthy gut, but do you actually know how to get it? Quaker's been serving UP fiber since 1877 with over 100 great tasting, good source of fiber options to choose from. Whether you like old fashioned oats, instant oatmeal granola, or oatmeal squares, Quaker makes it delicious.
- [00:20]
Brit Lee
Mmm.
- [00:21]
Quaker Oats Advertiser
So good. Get your fiber with Quaker Shop. Quaker's good source of fiber products at a store near you.
- [00:29]
Jenny Urch
Welcome to the 1000 Hours Outside podcast. My name is Jenny Urch. I'm the founder of 1000 Hours Outside and author, podcaster and our. I should have asked. Founder of Pure Athlete. What do you say?
- [00:40]
Brit Lee
Co founder.
- [00:40]
Jenny Urch
Yes, Co founder of Pure Athlete. Britt Lee is here. The book is called Parenting the Pure Athlete. Help your athlete maximize performance, achieve their goals, build lasting character. Welcome, Brit.
- [00:51]
Brit Lee
Thank you so much. I hope I can match your energy. Yeah, awesome.
- [00:55]
Jenny Urch
Okay, well, here's the thing.
- [00:57]
Brit Lee
Well, I know I can't.
- [00:58]
Jenny Urch
I need a lot of energy because I don't know much about sports. I was on the swim team when I was seven. It was called the Dolphins and I, which is a great name for a swim team. And I played T ball and that's the end.
- [01:11]
Brit Lee
So.
- [01:13]
Jenny Urch
But our kids play sports. And I do think it's like, for a lot of people, it's a big part of their time outdoors and they, you know, they love it, they love getting better. I think there's really something to be said, especially in this day and age with like, with your talents and your hobbies, like, with improvement, with seeing improvement and what that does for you, like your inner confidence and the way that you view yourself. So I would love for you to give us a little bit of your background. You've got four kids, two kids that were super into tennis, twin boys, girls that were into sports, but also into other things, too. Were you a sports person and then also had these sports kids, or did it start with your kids?
- [01:49]
Brit Lee
Well, first of all, I'm old, so all my. All my kids are grown. My two oldest daughters are both married. I've got my first grandkid who's three months old, which is awesome.
- [02:02]
Jenny Urch
Congrats.
- [02:03]
Brit Lee
But so I say all that to say that when you asked about, did I play sports? Yes, but it was a long time ago and I kind of played everything. And your audience, if they're into sports at all, know that sports are radically different. Youth sports today are radically different than they were. But back when I played sports, and so, yeah, all of my kids played sports. The two Older daughters mostly played recreational sports and my sons, one of them ended up playing Division 1 college tennis. But they both were like all in playing kind of high level everything until they played tennis full time in high school and then proceeded to college. But here's the important thing. What you said in your story is common to every single kid's sports story, is that it ends and yours ended early, some people's end at 13. Most, most people, 70% of kids quit sports by the age of 13. Organized sports. Only, only less than a percent ever earn a paycheck playing sports. So for all of us, it ends. And parents are spending so much time and so much money today that you have to at some point say, what is this all about? What's the return on investment? You know, what, what is this whole sports thing all about? And that kind of was the genesis for, for my book and for Pure Athlete.
- [03:45]
Jenny Urch
Okay, you said a couple things I think that are really worth exploring even deeper. So when you talk about the 70 that quit at 13. So this is our situation, that's kind of like when our kids started.
- [03:56]
Brit Lee
Yeah, yeah.
- [03:57]
Jenny Urch
You know, we like played in the woods. And you know what's so interesting to me, Brit, is actually they've done fine, I think, because 70 of the pool has dropped out.
- [04:07]
Podcast Host/Ad Reader
Right?
- [04:08]
Brit Lee
That's right. Yeah.
- [04:09]
Jenny Urch
I've been like, shocked. I'm like, they're making these high level teams, you know, they're like, oh, they're playing varsity. You know, they're the. And I was like, well, how is that? They've hardly ever played this sport before. But I think part of it is because, you know, a lot of the other kids have quit. So that's just kind of an interesting. I just want to say that sometimes things open up, you feel so much pressure to put them in when they're six and they're like, look, you know, if you can let them play and you talk about like, play a bunch of sports and you'll just be an athletic person. Be an athletic person. And then by the time, you know, high school comes around, so many other people will quit that there's going to be probably some openings for your kids.
- [04:42]
Brit Lee
Well, that's exactly right. And another, another twist on all that is even kids that are playing younger, the parents feel this huge pressure that they've got to play more and more because, you know, Johnny or Susie down the road are in this club and they are playing year round and they're, you know, putting all their time and their family's being dominated by this sport. And if I don't do this with my kid at 9 years old or 8 years old, then they're going to be left behind and they never have a chance. And this is before puberty and puberty changes everything. And so yeah, it's great if your kid is, you know, a top athlete at 7 years old, but it doesn't really matter. You know, lots of kids blossom late after puberty and so just chill out a little bit before all that happens.
- [05:36]
Jenny Urch
Yeah, yeah. Well, they talk about like what Michael Jordan did it make the varsity team and was kind of crushed. Yeah, right.
- [05:41]
Podcast Host/Ad Reader
About.
- [05:42]
Jenny Urch
You talk about a lot of these top level athletes like Tim Tebow and different ones like that Michael Jordan wasn't cut but he didn't make the varsity team. He was a, he was five foot one as a sophomore. That's the other thing. Like, you know, I'm like, my brothers, they grew, you know, like 10th, 11th, 12th. I used to teach high school. I'm like, there's such a difference between 9th grade and 10th grade. That's when all these, a lot of the boys will mature then and get a lot taller. They hit puberty like you said. And so everything changes. Okay. One other thing though that you brought up that I thought was really interesting was you said it ends. And I think that's true for a lot of sports, but it's, it's actually not true for everything. And so what's really neat is that some if, if you, you know, if you're, I don't know, maybe even all. But there's some, probably not football, I guess, but like a lot of sports you can play through old, a older age, you know. Like I got a brother that plays tennis competitively. He's in his 40s, he's super good. It's a huge part of his social life. Like in a huge part of his quality of life. My other brother still plays on a softball team, a co ed softball team. He plays on a coed volley team as an adult. It's like a, like a good part. I've got friends that play on adult soccer teams. I got friends that are in running clubs. You know, I, I mean I still swim. I'm not on a team, but I do swim a lot. You know, it's like part of the summer and so there. What should a parent be thinking about? Like, my mom always said this, she was like, look, you know, you're not going to see someone who's 79 years old running around on a soccer field. But you might see someone who's 79 years old, still playing the piano, you know, playing the piano at the funeral for all her friends that are dying or whatever, you know. So what, what are some of the thoughts long term life enhance enhancement?
- [07:20]
Brit Lee
Well, you know, if you get into really what the essence of sports are all about. Yeah. You know, we should enjoy sport for life, if we enjoy it. And it's really interesting that, you know, we, we're in this cycle where young kids, you know, back in my day, young kids would play free play sports. I mean, no parents involved. They just go to the ball field or the basketball court, they just play pickup and they just have a blast with it. And now a lot of that's gone. But so there's organized sports and we as parents organize and structure the heck out of it. And kids quit and so on and so forth. Or they play one sport and they eventually quit. But when they go to college, all of a sudden there's intramurals and kids play. Many kids start sports up again and play all the intramurals just for the fun of it, which is, and for the exercise and for all that kind of stuff. And then some sports lend themselves to playing for life. My boys are tennis players. They were out playing tennis last night
- [08:26]
Jenny Urch
and that's so good. Tennis in particular. Yeah, any racket sport. If you read any book about the brain, I know because of the cross body movement that's happening then throughout your life. I mean, it's so good, you have to be so quick on your feet. So that golf, I mean, golf would be another one.
- [08:42]
Podcast Host/Ad Reader
Right.
- [08:43]
Jenny Urch
Like my husband says, one of his biggest regrets is not playing on the golf team in high school. He's like, I could have free instructions. I could have gotten in all this golf time. So there's, I think there's something to be said and I think your book and your, you know, your podcast would be the same thing. People can go to pureathlete.com to learn more, but it's about having a more of a long term view, which is like, what are the ways that this could enhance my child's life, both now but also in the future? And I think there's a lot of ways, a lot of ways. I mean, it helps you build community and have friendships and stay in shape and keep your brain strong. So I think it's, I love hearing you talk about like your boys are still playing and so there can be this long term life enhancement if you, if your kid doesn't get burnt out and if, you know, there aren't any Major injuries, which sometimes goes in line with, you know, going too hard. Okay, so your boys had. All right, don't ask this question. I really want to know. They're twins. They both wanted to be Division 1 tennis players, but only one was one one burned out.
- [09:47]
Brit Lee
So, you know, twins was great in many, in many instances, sport wise, because they had each other, especially in the individual sport like tennis, had each other to practice with and play with and so on and so forth. At the same time, you know, there's, there's this thing where we go to tournaments and one achieves something really great and the other falls short of what he thinks he should do. And that happens all the time. So as a parent, you want to be celebrating and yet you're trying to console this one. And it's. Except when they played doubles and they were pretty good doubles team. That was great because they're either winning or losing together. But it was challenging. One of my sons is, you know, he's wired to, to be hard on himself and to, and to be negative on himself. And he wrestled with that throughout all of his sports career. And, and so he's a grinder and he was gritty and he learned a lot of great life lessons in sports, which, by the way, is a big focus of what we are about in pure athlete is, is sport teaches great life lessons. And that's really the ROI from sports. But, but anyway, by the time he was a, by the time he was a senior in high school and he could have played in college, he wasn't, he wasn't good enough to play at a major power four, power five type of school. And that's the kind of school he wanted to go to. And they never were trying to be pro tennis players. So he said, I'm done. And my other son was just like, you know, I've had this goal to play college tennis. I want to achieve the goal. He only played one year. He had surgery on both knees and before he went to college. So he's kind of broken going to college. And it was, you know, he achieved his goal, but he was done.
- [11:42]
Jenny Urch
Wow.
- [11:43]
Podcast Host/Ad Reader
Yeah.
- [11:43]
Jenny Urch
What an interesting world. It really has changed in terms of like how, how much commitment is needed. One of the things that you talk about and I, like, I've never even heard of this is a sports psychologist. Like, but for kids it's huge. Okay. We didn't need it on the Dolphins. So can you talk about what, like, I mean, you know, if you think about your own kid, you know, your childhood sports journey, it was like, oh, like maybe you played for the school team. I didn't even know the school had sports, honestly. Like, my brother now coaches. He coaches middle school volleyball, and we've gone to see some of the games, and I was like, this was happening, like, like, I didn't even know. So, so the, when did the sports psychologist. I mean, I guess I could see it for, like, pro athletes, but, like, when did that seep down into youth sports?
- [12:37]
Brit Lee
Well, I would say it's been over the past, you know, decade, decade and a half, something like that.
- [12:44]
Jenny Urch
Okay, so it's newer.
- [12:46]
Brit Lee
It's relatively new. I mean, it was probably back in the, in the 80s when, when sports psychologists started showing up as an important factor in pro sports with certain athletes. Now you've got a sports psychologist on staff at every college. I mean, everyone and in many, in many high schools have relationships with sports psychologists, and they could, as they call them, performance coaches oftentimes. And our mindset, you know, developing the right mindset, all those types of things. I mean, the professionalization of youth sports has been going on really for the last 10 years, and it's accelerating, maybe longer than that, but it's accelerating now. And so all those things that are about helping kids become the best versions of themselves and then couple that with the, the epidemic of, of mental health issues that we have among teens today because of, you name it, social media screens, pressure to perform in, across all these different arenas, all those types of things, you know, people are looking for, for ways to, to help their kids. In my, in my son's case, you know, I. At. At like 12 years old, I knew that, man, he is really. He is really negative and hard on himself. And, and I considered that, that I'm his parent. That's my, it's my job to parent him through all that. And, and again, he's trying to play. As he got older, he's trying to play sport at a high level. And it really was the hindrance to him. He. He could not perform. He could perform to a certain level in practice, but on the big stage, it was all. It was 100% up here. And, and, and because I had twins, I could see the difference. They were both kind of equally talented, but one had tremendous belief and the other had tremendous disbelief.
- [14:54]
Podcast Host/Ad Reader
When I think about building a wardrobe that actually works for real life, I want pieces that feel elevated but effortless. That's exactly what Quince does so well. Their styles are designed to layer, mix and repeat, so you're not constantly chasing the next trend, just reaching for what works Quince really shines when it comes to everyday staples. Their 100% organic cotton sweaters are soft and breathable, they're premium denim has stretch for all day comfort and their cotton cashmere blends are perfect for those in between seasons. These are pieces made to last, not just get you through one year. I also love how intentional Quince is about how their clothes are made. They work directly with safe, ethical factories and cut out the middleman, which means you're paying for quality, not a brand name or unnecessary markup. And the quality truly shows from the European linen to the organic cotton. The stitching, the fit, the feel, everything holds up beautifully. These are the items I keep reaching
- [15:42]
Jenny Urch
for week after week.
- [15:43]
Podcast Host/Ad Reader
I can't tell you how much I'm loving my Quince cashmere sweater. It's become a go to in my closet and honestly, it's one of those pieces I already plan to gift because it's that good. Refresh your wardrobe with quince. Go to quince.com outside for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada too. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E.com outside to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com outside
- [16:11]
Jenny Urch
by February, a lot of
- [16:12]
Podcast Host/Ad Reader
homeschool families are feeling the weight of winter. The days are shorter, routines feel harder to keep, and it can take more effort to stay consistent. That's why it's helpful to have learning tools that support progress without adding pressure, and IXL is a great example of that. One of the strengths of homeschooling is being able to adjust in real time. IXL is built to meet kids exactly where they are. It adapts to each learner instead of forcing everyone into the same box. What I appreciate most is how clear and organized it is. Everything is laid out by grade and subject so parents can quickly find what a child needs without bouncing between resources. Kids get instant feedback and explanations as they work, and parents get detailed progress reports that make growth visible and encouraging, especially during this mid year stretch. IXL covers math, language arts, science and social studies from Pre K through 12th grade, and it's designed to help families build confidence now and carry momentum into spring. Make an impact on your child's learning. Get IXL now and 1000 Hours Outside listeners can get an exclusive 20% off IXL membership when they sign up today at ixl.com 1000hours Visit ixl.com 1000hours to get the most effective learning program out there at the best price. There's something about the start of a new year that makes me want our home to feel more supportive, like it's actually helping us stay organized and focused instead of adding to the chaos. That's why I keep coming back to Wayfair. Wayfair truly has everything in one place, from bedding and bath essentials to storage solutions, to easy updates for kids rooms, living spaces, and work from home setups. Whether you're trying to simplify mornings, reset routines, or just make your space feel a little more peaceful, it's all there. One of the best updates we made recently was in our podcast studio. We received so many books from guests and they slowly had taken over every surface. We ordered shelving from Wayfair, and it was one of those changes that instantly made the space feel lighter and more intentional. The shelves fit the room perfectly, the style's clean and simple, and finally, everything has a place. It sounds small, but it made a huge difference in how the space feels when we walk in. That's what I love about Wayfair. The huge selection, the range of styles and price points, and how easy it is to find pieces that actually work for real life. If you're ready to get organized, refreshed, and back on track this new year, for way less, head to Wayfair.com right now to shop all things home.
- [18:18]
Jenny Urch
That's W A Y F A I
- [18:19]
Podcast Host/Ad Reader
R.com Wayfair Every style, every home.
- [18:25]
Brit Lee
And, you know, I thought for three or four years about, should I, should I go talk to a sports psychologist? But how do I do that and how do I find and what? And never did it until he was like 17. But those patterns show up now for him in other areas of life. And, and so I wish I had tackled that a little earlier with him.
- [18:46]
Jenny Urch
So you talk about how sports teaches great life lessons and there are, you know, like I've, I've actually read a significant, a significant amount, I mean, like five books about this sort of youth sports culture. And it is interesting how, you know, they talk about the life lessons, but also it really depends, you know, it depends on how the parent guides the child through or how the coaching staff is that there can also be some negative lessons as well, depending on how you approach it with your child. So I, you know, I love learning whether it's sports or hobby, whether it's music that you can grow, you can get better at things, you can become better crocheter, you know, you can become a better seamstress, you can become better in an instrument, you can become better at soccer. So like that belief that you can get better I think is established in childhood. Dealing with your nerves like you just brought up, that's a huge deal. Learning to be optimistic and envisioning wins, I mean these, you can see like this is actually something that would really help for the long haul. How do you as a parent then find the balance of making sure that this is a good life lesson and isn't pushed too far?
- [19:54]
Brit Lee
Yeah, well, I mean, I think pushing, pushing is a whole different subject. And we can talk about our message to parents. You know, constantly is, is all around intentionality and it, you know, oftentimes, I mean, you know this is cliche to say but, but it's reality. Oftentimes. You know, parents, I mean kids are doing what they're doing in sports because it's the parents dream and, and they're, and the kids are trying to pursue the parents goal. And so you know, we, we want to make sure that our kids are doing stuff that they're passionate about, you know, and, and if, if they're wanting to do it at a, at a pretty serious level which requires investment from the parents both financially and time and everything else, then I, I think that's worthy of. Start teaching your kids what does it, what does it mean to, to, to have a vision for meaning? What's your goal? What, what's your goal in this? What's your why, you know, what are you trying to achieve now? What are you going to do to achieve those things and what's your part in this equation? So those are, those are things that I think, you know, kids, kids can learn. But the biggest thing to me is just dealing with the everyday of sports and it's, it offers you so many opportunities as a parent to teach your kid how to deal with adversity, how to deal with failure, how to deal with coaches that are unfair because you're going to have a boss one day that's unfair, you know, and on and on and on. You know, how to be a great teammate, how to be a leader even if you're not in the leadership position, how to, you know, just all those types of things. But as a parent, if you don't go into it with a mindset of, of being intentional so those opportunities come and you just let them go by then you're missing to me the big value. You know, there is, there's no co. It's not a coincidence that almost like 70% of CEOs at major corporations played college sports.
- [22:08]
Jenny Urch
Whoa.
- [22:09]
Brit Lee
It's Crazy the correlation there because there's so many things you learn about grit and you learn about bouncing back from adversity and all those types of things. And, and, and being coachable. You learn how to take criticism and learn how to be coachable. And, and so all those things are great lessons for your kids to translate into, you know, succeeding at whatever they do in life.
- [22:36]
Jenny Urch
I love this part in the Parenting, the Pure athlete book where you talk about them taking ownership even of their time then, because there's to your point of like, okay, youth sports have changed and become more all consuming than they were. So you say, back when I was a kid, this was much easier for parents. We didn't have the all in sports culture that exists today. Sure, there was a level of commitment required, but kids didn't have to play Travel Ball at 11 years old to make the high school team. Kids could play three to five sports sports and compete well at all of them. Sports psychologists, speed and agility trainers and sports academies were a rarity. So there's a change there, right? Sports have become more all in. Well, at the same time, distractions have increased. So it's actually quite the conundrum, right? It's like, well, if you needed to practice more in 1989, well, there wasn't as much television or screens or any of the drama that happens on social media. So now you've got kids that are kind of expected to put in more effort, more time, while at the same time the distractions are up. So you wrote the distractions are constantly tugging at them. Social media, YouTube, hanging out with friends, which that's obviously a good thing to do. But there's, you know, video games or that's, that's another one, right? Or even just SportsCenter itself. And we've got a kid that's always like, there's a game on. I'm like, there's always a game. There will never not be a game on. That's the way that it goes. So you had this really good idea in there about having your kids, especially if they're, I think you can take the motivation, especially if they're motivated to get better at their sport, which like, I think is one of the most important things in life to know that you can grow and get better and have those experiences and see that growth so that you in later life can be like, look, I can get better at this, I can improve or whatever to have them really look at their schedules. Can you talk about how that might work with that with like a middle school or a high schooler. And I think you did that in your family, right? Which is like, okay, let's actually look and see where is this time going?
- [24:29]
Brit Lee
I did, I did. And I, I mean, I'm not, look, there's some people who are, who are just wired that way, like they schedule every minute of the day. And I'm not like that personally, but I think there's balance in all that. So, yeah, I, I, you know, rather than. I struggled as a parent and look, everything that I talk about in the book, I learned oftentimes by doing it the wrong way and making mistakes and so on and so forth. But, you know, this, this whole thing of I would get frustrated with, I'm investing so much of my time and treasure on my, on my kids sports dreams and then they go through periods where they didn't seem very committed and, and I would be just churning on the inside, frustrated and fighting myself to not be frustrated with them and push them too hard and all that kind of stuff. So one of the things, one of the solutions, I came up with it at one point was to sit down with my boys and say, you know, you have the same 24 hours a day and that everybody has. And you say you want to do this and you say you want to do that. I want you just to kind of chart out how many hours in a day that you, how you're using those 24 hours. Start with eight hours of sleep or whatever it is and knock that off. And, and then they went in and they, they laid out, you know, they laid out all their hours and, and we said, okay, how much time? And told me you need to have free time. I mean, our kids don't have any boredom time anymore, which is unhealthy in my, in my view. But anyway, they went through this exercise on their own and they, it was an aha moment for them to realize how much time they're wasting, you know, and, and again, I'm not, I wasn't looking for them to regiment every hour of their day, but it more was an exercise of an awareness that if you say you want to do this, how much time are you devoting to it? And I'll do my part, but you got to make a commitment to do your part when it gets into big money and all that kind of stuff, which it does if you're trying to really go all in, then that was just a good tool. And it was a good tool, I think, for my kids to learn for other aspects of life.
- [26:59]
Jenny Urch
I think so too. I Think that's a huge tool. I told you. I was actually late getting onto this episode because I was talking to this mom who's about to have her fifth baby, and she's written 10 novels. She's a homeschool mom. Homeschool mom with four kids and about to have her fifth, lives on a farm and. And has 10 novels that she's written, and she's about to have this baby, but she's flying out to Canada tomorrow because two of the books are getting turned into movies this year. Two of her novels. And you're like. That is a situation where you're like, okay, a homeschool mom with four kids, and she's pregnant, she's got no time, but somehow she's done. She's finding it similar to what your boys. It's like they did a little bit of a time audit. And sometimes you can be like, well, yeah, you know, an hour or two a week. I watch this show. Maybe I shouldn't. You know, I'm. I agree with you that boredom is important, but a lot of times our time is getting sucked up by things that don't make us feel good, like time on screens, and you could do something different with that time.
- [27:57]
Brit Lee
Well, I agree. And. And when. Let me. Let me clarify. When I say boredom is important, I think it's important to sit and think.
- [28:05]
Podcast Host/Ad Reader
Yeah.
- [28:05]
Brit Lee
You know, absolutely. And. And we've lost. I mean, our kids have lost that art. I mean, if they have. If they have, quote, boredom time, they're. They're looking at their phone and. Whatever happened to laying in bed at night, you know, and just thinking for 30 minutes before you fall asleep?
- [28:22]
Jenny Urch
Yeah.
- [28:22]
Brit Lee
I mean, I think. I think it's super valuable and super important.
- [28:27]
Jenny Urch
I agree. I was at a museum yesterday with our youngest, and they had this. I was like a total flashback to my childhood. They had these card car bingo. It's like a cardboard. Like a really thin cardboard, you know, square, and it's a bingo board, and it's like it. And you have these little slots that are red that you can move over if you see that, and you're trying to get bingo. So it's like a barn, you know, if you see it while you're driving. And I was like, oh, my gosh. Like, my mom totally bought those for us. And when you were a kid, think about all the time you had a car that was exactly what you're talking about. You're either having a conversation or you're just sitting there contemplating life because they're.
- [29:06]
Brit Lee
Yeah.
- [29:06]
Jenny Urch
Or you're playing carb and go. There's like nothing else to do. So yeah, that, that's really been lost. And I, I totally agree with you. That time to, I talked to this man that he called it dosing and spacing, that your brain really grows in that space time. So like you have, you have a dose, you know, like of learning something or trying a new skill, but your brain really has to have time to process that and solidify it in order for it to stick. So that, that's a good conversation to have, especially with older kids, which is like, where is your time going? And do you have time to just sit and contemplate and, and let your brain relax and kind of form those.
- [29:42]
Brit Lee
Yep.
- [29:43]
Jenny Urch
Neural pathways.
- [29:46]
Podcast Host/Ad Reader
Some seasons I really want to eat healthier, but I just don't have the time or mental energy to plan it all out. Between busy days and full schedules, meal planning is usually the first thing to fall apart. That's what changed for us when we started using Hungry Root. It made healthy eating feel doable again. Hungry Root works like a personal nutrition coach and grocery shopper. In one, you tell them your taste preferences and health goals and they take care of the planning and shopping for you. The recipes are simple, the ingredients are high quality, and everything is tailored specifically to you. What I've noticed is how easy it is to stay consistent whether you're trying to eat cleaner, get more protein, or just avoid ingredients that don't make you feel your best. Hungry Root removes the guesswork and the more you use it, the better it gets at learning what you actually love. There are thousands of recipe options every week, no junk ingredients and responsibly sourced meat and seafood. And if you're trying to keep healthy habits going past January, this really helps you stick with it. Right now, take advantage of this exclusive offer. Get 40 off your first box plus a free item in every box for life. Go to hungryroot.com 1000hours and use code 1000hours. That's hungryroot.com 1000hours. Code 1000hours.
- [30:51]
Jenny Urch
Can you talk about one of the things that you talk about in parenting? The Pure athlete, which is about helping your athlete maximize performance, achieve their goals, build asking character. People can also check out your website, pure athlete.com you have your podcast appear athlete and different courses. Right now there's a master class about baseball, but there are other sports that are in the works. One of the things that you talk about is our. This kind of goes with everything, our non verbal communication. So I think you know the message Is a little bit out there. Like, try not to, on the way home, do a play by play about how the game went. You know, just like, try not to do that. The kids start to, they. A lot of them quit sports because of the car ride home. You don't have to review what you write, don't review the game film. On the way home. They got to know that life is more than sports. So. Okay, all right. But you're like, you also really got to watch your non verbal communication as well. Can you talk about that? You know, just the little things and what they can communicate to kids.
- [31:45]
Brit Lee
So hard. It's so hard for parents, I would say, you know, we're in this tennis community and, and you see the same people. We traveled around the southeast. I'm from Atlanta. We traveled around the southeast playing tournaments. And a lot of the same people becomes a community. You know, the people, I would say most of the parents, by the way, tennis, you can't. It. You can sit and watch, but you can't, you can clap for a good point, but you can't talk to your kid. So you, you can't say anything. You can't express very much why.
- [32:20]
Jenny Urch
Why is that?
- [32:23]
Brit Lee
It's just a culture. It's the culture. And, and you can't. There's no coaching allowed whatsoever. And so, you know, now you can, you can, you know, if my kid's behaving badly, I can say like, knock it off. You know, something like that. But. But you can't, you can't really coach.
- [32:42]
Jenny Urch
Okay, That's. Is that pretty unique? Because, you know, it's like, if you're on the sidelines of the soccer field, everyone's like, run, run. You know, for all the things I always tell this story, like when I was a kid and I was on the dolphins, there would be like moms that would like be walking along the pool edge and like screaming at their kids. And I was like, like, they are underwater with a swim cap on. They cannot hear you. And do you at all trust their intrinsic motivation? They're trying to swim fast. It's like they shoot off a gun. You know, I know it's not a real gun, but it's like. Or like a big horn. You're like, that's enough to get your adrenaline going for a race. So that's interesting that in tennis it's a different. I mean, golf is somewhat similar, right? Where it's like, if you ever watch it on tv, which I've seen it like a few times, I kind of think it's boring, but it's like, people are like clapping, like, you know, like this little clap. You know, it's very quiet.
- [33:28]
Brit Lee
It's very quiet. But in golf you can have a coach and you can have a caddy and, and they can, you know, collaborate with you. But no, tennis is tennis, no, not. Well, in junior tennis. No. You know, the sport has had this tradition of tennis is a, figure it out on your own type of thing in the, in the heat of the battle. Now in professionals, they've just started allowing coaching in the past couple of years. And I don't, I don't mean, I mean during the match.
- [34:01]
Jenny Urch
Yeah, during the match. Yeah. I didn't know anything intriguing.
- [34:04]
Brit Lee
Yeah. So in one sense it's healthy because, you know, go to any baseball field today and just like you said, Johnny goes up to bat and there's three people yelling instructions to him and he has, he's like, just let the kid hit. You know, you're not.
- [34:21]
Jenny Urch
Or like they hit the ball and people are like, he probably knows that he's supposed to do that.
- [34:28]
Brit Lee
Right. So anyway, so back to your question about nonverbal communication. Most of those parents who knew me would say, oh, he's such a calm dad and he never, you know. My boys, on the other hand, I could sit through a tennis match and I could be perfect. My demeanor was perfect, everything, 99% of the time. And the one time that I, that I made a face because they made a dumb error, I, they saw it and it frustrated them and, or for example, if I had to go to the restroom, you know, in the middle of the match, I had to worry about, they're going to think I could, I didn't, I couldn't get up when they had just done something bad because they would interpret, that is, oh, he's just mad and he's walking off. So non verbal communication is huge. And your kids, not all of them, but most of your kids are aware of, of the looks you're giving, the faces you're making, all that kind of stuff.
- [35:32]
Jenny Urch
Yeah. It's important to remember it impacts them. Yeah. Yes. That it's not just about what are you yelling? We were at. I wasn't there. But our boys play basketball and there was just like a, and they're like at a small school playing another small, a homeschool program, actually, they were playing. So it's like the small school versus the home schools. And the ref or umpire, I never know what, which one ref. Okay. For basketball. So he had to come over to the stands. Or I guess he told the athletic director, like, if these people do not stop whatever they're doing, he's gonna kick them out. Yeah, he was gonna kick them out. I was like, I've never even heard of that. The parents. He's going to kick him out of the game. He's like, and we're going to finish with none of this on the sideline. So I obviously, I think people are. Have had experience of parents going berserk on the sidelines, but I think it's important that you bring up even your nonverbal. You're like. It can be a facial expression, a shrug of the shoulders, a dropping of the head at an inopportune time. You say it's body language. And my young athletes can read it like a book even when no one else can. You wrote, what I've learned is that it doesn't help them perform better. It doesn't help our relationship. And I always regret it. And you're really honest. You're like, I battle it. But I think that's about being self aware, and I think that's an important piece to think about in any stage of parenting, especially when your kids are doing different types of performances. And I think that would apply across the board, right. Whether they're in a play or they're, you know, doing music or whatever. My mom always said, do your best, forget the rest. And I just felt like I've taken that with me, you know, still think about it, do your best, forget the rest.
- [37:13]
Brit Lee
So, yeah, that's awesome.
- [37:15]
Podcast Host/Ad Reader
All right.
- [37:16]
Jenny Urch
You have four kids, two that really want to be tennis players and are, you know, on this Track for Division 1. So you're doing tournaments. How do you deal with juggling siblings?
- [37:25]
Brit Lee
It's hard. I mean, that was a point of friction. Now in, in my case, my daughters were older, so by the time that we were traveling with my boys and we, we traveled. When I say we traveled, we probably traveled once a month and. But two to three times a month. We might be at tournaments on the weekend. Some of them being in Atlanta, there's, you know, there's stuff around Atlanta, but. So my girls were old enough where they had their lives, you know, and so they weren't looking for daddy time all the time. But we're, we're. Are a tight. We're a very tight knit, close family. We still are. And that's really valuable to me. And they knew they could. If they were frustrated with me about anything, they could push my buttons by saying, all you care about is the boys tennis, you know, and it would just. It would just wound me deeply because there was some truth to that. If you looked at how I spent my time, yeah, I spent an inordinate amount of time doing that. So that's a real thing that parents, you know, have to deal with, is balancing the time among all the kids. And, and even if all the kids play sports, you might have one kid. That's phenomenal. And as a parent, if you're into sports, you're going to be more inclined to, like, I want to be there more. Even though you love all your kids equally, it's just, it's fun when your kid in. In musical theater or in anything, when your kid excels, I mean, his parents is fun. And you have to check that motivation. But anyway, so it's just, I think it's something that, you know, my wife and I were. She was. Is not into sports near as much send to her kids, but she's not into sports. She was a very good check for me, and she would check me. I prayed a lot about all of that and was just try, try to be very intentional to have, you know, good relationships with all my kids. And, and I'll say one thing, and people can disagree or agree with this, but I'm not. I don't subscribe to the old theory that quality time is more important than quantity of time. I believe, I believe quantity is quality, and it can be. It can be bad. But I think people who, a lot of people make excuses for not giving their kids enough time by saying, well, I give them quality time. Well, now your kids want, well, they want volume of time with you too. And so I think it's just, it's just a parenting challenge in the world of sports and in the world of anything. Whatever your kids are into is, are we doing the right things for the family and am I doing the right things for, you know, all my kids interest? If my kids are, you know, a musician, you know, am I as interested in that as I am in sports? Even though I love sports and I don't know anything about music or, you know, I'm just, Just as an example.
- [40:33]
Jenny Urch
Yeah, I like that you said it's fun. I think that sometimes we, we really focus on living vicariously through our kids, and people are like, oh, you know, we get into this unhealthy spa where we really want the kid to win because maybe we didn't win or we didn't get a chance to play the, the sport, but really at the, at the baseline I think for most parents, it is just fun. It's fun to watch your kids excel at things, and so it can be tricky to miss that, like, even to miss one game or miss because you're like, oh, it'd be fun if I was there. I'd love to go sit and watch. But, you know, it's like, if you got a lot of kids, we've got five. It's like, inevitably, you do miss some things, or you shoot, you choose to, because there's these other things. You're basically choosing to miss out on what would be fun, and you make that choice for the sake of the family unit, and that makes it make more sense because it is. It really is fun. It's fun to just like, sit and watch fun things and watch your kids do other things, you know, or be part of a team. Okay, so I've done, I don't know, 700 podcast interviews, Brit, and rarely. Sometimes. But rarely do I come across another person whose background looks exactly like my own. We completely match. Can you just give me a little insight? There are so many books behind you. What are they about?
- [41:49]
Brit Lee
I know I was out. We were talking. I was like, hey, we have a similar set.
- [41:53]
Jenny Urch
We match. And I actually. It's actually somewhat rare. Like, I would say, like, one out of 100 people have, you know, or maybe two, you know, have a setup like that. What kind? And I see, obviously, you've got your stack of parenting, the pure athlete, but, like, what else is back there?
- [42:08]
Brit Lee
Well, I would be lying if I said that all the books behind me are my books or that I read all these books. My wife is a voracious reader, and she is an educator and a reading specialist, so she loves books. So some of them are her books. Some of them are business books. Some of them are books around faith. Faith is a big part of our lives. Some of them are sports books, some of them are biographies. So there's no. There's no rhyme or reason to them. Just. Just a potpourri of different kinds of books. And one of. And one of my goals this year is to read a book a month. So that tells you I'm not, you know, I'm not some crazy reader that, you know, Having a book a month,
- [42:59]
Jenny Urch
though, is a great goal. Yeah, 12 bucks in a year. I mean, that's. That's. I mean, I think that enhances your life, and you probably can really like that. You have your dosing and spacing. You know, it's like you read it, and then you have some space to really kind of mull it over or talk to people about it. So I just want to highlight a couple other things that are in parenting the pure athlete, for people that are interesting, interested. You talk about the, you know, should you, as a parent, should you coach? You go through that. You talk about specialization. We talked a little bit about that today. But you go into more depth. Depth. You talk about kids are often broken by the time they go to college. So you go into more depth about specialization. You talk about what to do when kids want to quit.
- [43:34]
Podcast Host/Ad Reader
How do you deal with that?
- [43:35]
Jenny Urch
And you know, do you just, do they just need to take a break? How do you figure out that part? You talk about how to overcome adversity like injuries or coaches. Maybe they're not getting picked to play. You talk a lot about leadership. So a lot in this book for parents who are in the midst of navigating the sports world and also it might be on the horizon for them. So a lot they can learn. Can you tell the listeners what they might find@PureAthlete.com as well as if they were interested in your podcast? What kind of topics do you cover?
- [44:06]
Brit Lee
Yeah, you know, our, our podcast and we've done 170some episodes, which is. We're just baby steps compared to you,
- [44:16]
Jenny Urch
but mine is a little over the top.
- [44:18]
Brit Lee
But, you know, one of my partners is Jeff Rancour, who played Major League Baseball for 12 years. He's a broadcaster for TBS Now. He has four kids that are all. He's a generation younger than me, so he's coaching his kids. He's in the middle of all this right now. And my other co host has six kids and he is my age and he is, he was a, he was. He ran a sports business and sold it and became a high school athletic director for 10 years. So he's had that perspective of dealing with lots of families. So our podcast, which is a weekly podcast, we bring in top athletes across every sport, guys and women, and we let them talk about their youth sports journey. And many of them now are parents and they're going through it also. And so we get insights from folks who've. Who reached the highest levels. But now we're trying to navigate this whole thing and we just talk about all these issues in a hopefully a very relatable way for parents, you know, and all. A lot of what we're trying to do, Jenny, is give perspectives to people to think about that they, they're on this journey and they're fighting these battles in their head. What do I do here and what do I do here? And these people are telling me I got to do this and like specializing it. Nine years old, you've got to pick a sport and you need to play it year round. And we're like, no, you don't. Don't. That's a lie. And yet there's benefits to that, but there's also major risk in doing that as well. And there's data and research and, and so we want to be a resource to all the parents out there. And, and we have experts that come on and talk about mental health and eating disorders with athletes and, and you know, and mental performance coaches in parenting, experts and all kinds of folks on there. So that, that's what the podcast is all about. All our episodes, you know, are everywhere. You can listen to podcasts, but you can also go to Pure Athlete.com and see all our episodes. And we've just launched our first masterclass and the Masterclass is called PA Plus Baseball. It's@Pure Athlete.com and it is a member platform. But I mean it costs, it costs less than 10 bucks a month. And there is a ton of content. There's like right now for, for baseball families, there's 200 plus micro lessons on there delivered by experts and by pro players on kind of answering questions about everything you need to know all along the youth sports journey, from getting started to travel ball to I want to get recruited. So, so people who are a little more serious about pursuing goals. That's what that whole piece is all about. And again, it's, It's@Pure Athlete.com.
- [47:26]
Jenny Urch
all right. It's so much, so much to help because I, you know, I've talked about that got. You've four and I don't remember what the numbers are. You talk about 18 million kids in the US ages 6 to 12 play a team or individual sport and then obviously that number drops at high school level, because we already talked about that. But like the amount of money that's going into this, I mean, it's like in the billions of dollars. So obviously this is like a very pertinent topic. So all of that is so helpful. The Pure athlete podcast. Pure athlete.com. if you ever need to talk to someone who swam in elementary school, I'll, I'll be your girl. Okay, Brit, this has been an honor. And I like, I mean, I, I think this is one of the top topics of our time really, you know, is like, what are you going to do about your kids in sports? So these resources are fantastic. We always end our show with the same question. What's a favorite memory from your childhood that was outside?
- [48:15]
Brit Lee
Favorite. Oh, that's a great question. Favorite memory from childhood outside is probably. Is probably what we've lost today is. Is. Is leaving the house in the morning and hanging out with friends, riding bikes, you know, just playing pickup ball. Just. Just having fun. Just having fun with kids in an unstructured way, letting us figure out, you know, our own path at our own. Our own structure and their safety issues today and all that. But. But that's. That's probably my best memory.
- [48:56]
Jenny Urch
Oh, that freedom. That freedom. We definitely need to bring it back for kids for sure, because it feels so good in Charlton and it does so much for kids in the long term. Brit, thank you so much for being here.
- [49:05]
Brit Lee
Thank you, Jenny. Really appreciate it.
- [49:10]
Best Western Advertiser
Where's your playlist taking you? Down the highway to the mountain or just into daydream mode while you're stuck in Traffic? With over 4,000 hotels worldwide, Best Western is there to help you make the most of your getaway, wherever that is. Because the only thing better than a great playlist is a great trip. Life's the trip. Make the most of it at Best Western. Book direct and save@bestwestern.com.