1KHO 766: Happiness Multiplies When You Share It | Ty Dannenbring and Jeff Dillon, Party in the Front

Summary

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Podcast Summary: "Happiness Multiplies When You Share It"

The 1000 Hours Outside Podcast — Episode 1KHO 766
Guests: Ty Dannenbring & Jeff Dillon (Authors, Party in the Front)
Host: Ginny Yurich
Date: April 12, 2026

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Episode Overview

This episode centers on building community, combating loneliness, and reclaiming authentic connection in a culture that trends toward isolation. Ginny Yurich welcomes Ty Dannenbring and Jeff Dillon, friends and co-authors of Party in the Front: Overcome Loneliness and Build Community Right Where You Are, to share practical ideas and heartful stories about fostering neighborhood togetherness—especially by making intentional use of front yards and small gestures.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Origin Stories and the Power of Presence

• Ty and Jeff’s friendship began eight years ago after Ty’s move to Colorado. Originally bonded through church and family activities, they grew into close collaborators with a joint passion for community-building.
• [01:42] Ty: “My family moved to Colorado eight years ago and we probably met the Dillons that first weekend at church.”
• Both reflect on their neighborhoods, the changing nature of acquaintanceship, and realizing that genuine community isn’t always a given—even if you’re naturally extroverted.

2. Milking the Cow: Finding Purpose Through Embodied Routine

• Ty shares a deeply personal story about a dark period in his life, being taken in by a church family, and how the responsibility of milking their cow provided structure and a sense of meaning.
• [03:48] Ty: “I just again needed purpose each morning to wake up and have a reason to do something. At that point, I didn't really want to talk to people. I was happy just to talk to the milk cow.”
• This period sparked small but vital connections, such as training a neighbor for the Citadel, which helped Ty see how ordinary acts could spark new relational bonds.

3. Writing Party in the Front — From Friendship to Collaboration

• The book idea originated from Ty’s desire to share practical methods for connecting with neighbors. Jeff, with a background in journalism and church ministry, enthusiastically joined him.
• [06:54] Jeff: “Ty had this idea… to share simple, practical, fun ways to connect with our neighbors and build relationships where we are.”

4. Front Yards Over Backyards: Small Shifts, Big Impact

• Jeff recounts the significance of front porches, drawing inspiration from his “Grampy Don” who, simply by being present on his porch, fostered a tight-knit network.
  • [09:03] Jeff: “He wasn't the easiest guy to know, but the key for him was simply being present... He knew people's names and everyone knew him.”
• Moving gatherings from backyards to front yards increases visibility and approachability, breaking social barriers and making community interactions more organic.

5. Practical Traditions That Spark Connection

• Pancake Breakfasts: Ty and family started hosting these in their front yard using a Blackstone griddle, inviting neighbors for casual morning gatherings.
  • [26:37] Ty: “We like to say if you griddle it, they will come.”
• Popsicle Nights: Jeff’s wife initiated “popsicle nights,” offering free treats from a cooler in the front yard and easily drawing dozens of neighbors for spontaneous interactions.
  • [30:02] Jeff: “My wife gets so much credit... so many people stopped and had conversations… and now it’s grown into full-on neighborhood parties.”
• Both share how children's presence and simple activities like lemonade stands serve as connection catalysts.

6. Loneliness: Cultural Trends and the Role of Architecture

• The discussants reference the seminal book Bowling Alone, which provides historical context for social decline in America—from bowling clubs and bridge games to the replacement of front porches by back decks.
  • [21:27] Jeff: “The Internet just poured gasoline on the flames that were already there… people doing less and less with others and certainly in neighborhoods.”
• Their observations are that loneliness is not a new trend, but technology, architecture, and lifestyle changes have accelerated our disconnection.

7. Church, Hurt, and Authentic Community

• The episode takes a deeply vulnerable turn as Ginny shares her family’s painful experience with church hurt, prompting an honest discussion on institutional trust, pastoral standards, and what genuine connection looks like versus systemic failures.
  • [42:40] Ginny: “I hate… the ‘church is filled with broken people’ [line]. Yes, but for pastoral staff, God has a different standard. It is above reproach.”
• Jeff and Ty agree that true fellowship involves accountability, confession, and relationships where “things can be brought to light” rather than concealed.
  • [45:24] Jeff: “Do we have people in our lives… who know the messiness, that we can share our struggles with, and that will hold us accountable?”
  • [47:50] Ty: “We talk about isolation being a weapon of Satan… if our homes can once again be a tool for connection, and inviting people back in…”

8. The B.L.E.S.S. Framework: Practical Steps for Connection

• The book introduces the B.L.E.S.S. acronym (Begin with prayer, Listen, Eat, Serve, Share) as a practical guide to getting started with neighbor outreach.
  • [53:44] Jeff: “If you don’t know where to begin… do you actually know the name of the guy that lives down the street in the blue house?”
• Suggestions include printing out a satellite map of your neighborhood (for practical awareness, not spying), learning names, and intentionally reaching out.

9. Restoring Optimism Through Action

• The authors stress that while our connectedness was “not broken overnight,” it also won’t be repaired overnight—but optimism, creativity, and consistent small efforts are key.
  • [55:03] Ginny: “It wasn’t broken overnight, so it won’t be fixed overnight… Be optimistic. Perhaps nothing is in shorter supply today than optimism.”

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On the transformation of purpose:
  • [03:48 Ty] “To the listener that may be lonely and isolated, this story hopefully you can relate to… I just didn't want to go to bed… so this church family took me in and… you have to milk the cow.”
• On the power of small, visible gestures:
  • [11:15 Ty] “I don't do this to everyone that walks by… but putting your hand up for a high five when running by—it’s just fun. People then kind of have a reputation in your neighborhood as approachable.”
• On food as a connector:
  • [26:37 Ty] “We like to say if you griddle it, they will come.”
• On “popsicle nights” and kids as connectors:
  • [30:02 Jeff] “Just simple, fun things involving our kids… our kids really are one of the best ways to make connections with people around us.”
• On healing from community/church hurt and the need for accountability:
  • [44:35 Jeff] “We have to be in true authentic relationship… where people can bring things to the light… and hopefully help each other and bring accountability before things get way worse.”

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Important Segment Timestamps

• [01:42] — Ty and Jeff’s friendship roots and family background
• [03:48] — Ty’s story of struggle, renewal, and the milk cow
• [06:54] — Genesis and “reverse mullet” theme of Party in the Front
• [09:03] — Grampy Don’s front porch lessons in presence and community
• [12:28] — The home concert that became a neighborhood annual event
• [14:12] — “Apron” vs. “eyebrow”—neighborhood architecture for engagement
• [20:48] — National loneliness trends and decline of communal clubs (inspired by Bowling Alone)
• [23:40] — Real-world difficulties reaching out in new neighborhoods
• [26:37] — Pancake breakfasts and griddle-powered connection
• [30:02] — Popsicle nights, lemonade stands, and using kids to build bridges
• [32:58] — Importance of cross-generational community for children
• [37:25–49:31] — Honest exploration of church hurt, trust breakdowns, and the need for relational repair
• [52:56] — Introduction of the B.L.E.S.S. framework
• [55:00–55:52] — The importance of optimism and small steps
• [56:38] — Guests’ favorite outdoor childhood memories and closing

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Tone & Language

The conversation is heartfelt, practical, and affirming—balanced between personal vulnerability, research-based insights, and actionable community strategies. Ty and Jeff are down-to-earth, witty, and approachable; Ginny’s hosting is open, candid, and sometimes raw, especially during the church hurt segment.

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Takeaway Message

Loneliness is not a modern fluke but a decades-long trend—yet every person has the power to reverse isolation through small, intentional acts of hospitality and presence. Whether it’s a pancake breakfast on your driveway or simply being present on your front porch, happiness multiplies when you share it. Building deeper community begins right where you are, with whoever is near.

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Find more:

• Party in the Front by Ty Dannenbring & Jeff Dillon
• partyinthefront.com
• Instagram: @partyinthefront

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Transcript

[A]

We have had a lot of conversations on this show about how every child is different and how especially for kids with ADHD or other learning differences, the world can feel a little overwhelming sometimes. And if you're parenting a child like that, I want to point you to a podcast called Everyone Gets a Juice Box. It's a space where parents are just being really honest with each other about what this journey actually looks like. The questions, the doubts, the small wins, all of it. One part of a recent episode that really stuck with me was this mom who was talking about how she started noticing things early on. Little signals that something might be different. But at the same time, everyone around her was. Was saying, she's fine. And she described that feeling so well, that back and forth between I know something's going on and what if I'm overreacting. I think so many parents have felt that tension. And then when she shared this moment where her daughter said, I can feel it talking about her body not giving her the signals she needed. And it opened up this whole understanding about how some kids experience the world so differently on a sensory level. It was such a powerful reminder that often our kids are having a hard time. And the more we understand what's going on beneath the surface, the better we can show up for them. I really appreciated how thoughtful and honest the whole conversation was. So if that sounds like something you need right now, go give it a listen. To listen Search for Everyone gets a juice Box in your podcast app. That's Everyone Gets a Juice Box.

[B]

Welcome to the 1000 Hours Outside podcast. My name is Jenny Erich. I'm the founder of 1000 Hours Outside. We're going to be talking today about community and about extending our community and using often our time outside as ways to build community. If you live in a home and you've got a front yard and a backyard, just kind of shifting what we do. I read a book called Party in the Front. Overcome Loneliness and Build Community Right where you are. Both of the authors are here. Ty Dannenbring and Jeff Dillon. Welcome.

[C]

Oh, Jenny, this is awesome. Thank you so much for having us.

[B]

Tell us your origin story. How did you meet?

[C]

Let's see. Well, my family moved to Colorado eight years ago and we probably met the Dylan's that first weekend at church. So yeah, my wife Ashley and I were from South Dakota originally and then moved here and now we're in Loveland, Colorado.

[B]

And you've been there the same. Same church, the same thing the whole time? Same.

[C]

We are now in a sister church. So same church Network, but in Fort Collins, technically. We live now kind of on the north side of Loveland, which is closer to Fort Collins.

[B]

So did you both go to that. The sister church?

[D]

So Ty's actually at a different church now. We're at different churches, but we were together at the same church for like five. Five years or something. But we.

[C]

There was a lot.

[D]

We decided we can still be friends. We. We decided that. So we. We still hang out and. Yeah, it's. It's a. It's a sister church of ours and so we. We love them. Yeah, we met through church and now, yeah, we're just family friends. Our wives are friends, our kids are friends. You guys, do you have a dog?

[C]

No. You guys.

[D]

You guys started that brand. We just got a dog. So, you know, you need to get a dog or dogs can be friends, but we're just all friends.

[C]

We were thinking maybe rabbits. We had this conversation with my wife the other day, so there you.

[D]

Oh, there you go.

[B]

Okay. Rabbits have pellet poop, and that means you can throw it right in your garden. So actually rabbits are great and they poop in the same spots. You can just put a bucket there. That's what I've learned. I've never tried it, but I have heard that o your friends. And you really are wanting to share this message about getting out of loneliness and building community. So I would love it, Ty, if you kicked it off with a story. There's a cow on the front of this. Now, this doesn't really look like a milk cow, but I'm sure that you can milk any cow. But you talk about when you were. And I think this is actually a fantastic story because you talk about how you're like in a bad spot in life and the act of you moved in with this other family and the act of milking their cow. You have to get up, you have to get out of bed, you have to go outside, you have to interact in this embodied way. Really starts to shift these. Shift things for you. So can you kick it off with that story?

[C]

Yes. Thanks for asking. Well, you know, to the listener that may be lonely and isolated, this story hopefully you can relate to. And I was at a crossroads in my life and finished up graduate school, didn't really know what I wanted to do and was just struggling with a number of things, but direction was one of them. And. And so some things were just kind of spiraling and got to a point where anxiety, depression really set in. And it was just a scary point and kind of one of those times where you just, you just don't want to go to bed, you don't want to lay your head because it's scary and you start hearing voices and you know, or lies in your head and you really have to fight. So this church family, they took me in and they were like, you can stay with us for six months and you have to milk the milk cow.

[B]

I kind of love it. I kind of love it because I think anybody who has an animal that they have to milk. Like we did a milk goat during COVID because we thought we were going to die. And so we were like, well, at least I guess we can drink milk. So we had this milk goat. We actually crossed state lines to get it. When we thought that they were going to close down the state lines, we like, we were like, we have to get to Indiana to get this mother goat. And then we brought it down. Not miss a day. That's what I didn't realize. You're kind of tied to that. So I can totally see a family being like, wait, if we bring in Ty, then we can. We don't have to be free labor every day. But it is amazing what it did for you.

[C]

Yeah, well, I mean, it gave me purpose. It wasn't the one thing necessarily that brought me out of that funk, but. But it definitely helped. And. And so, you know, I just again, needed purpose each morning to wake up and have a reason to. To do something. And you know, at that point, I didn't really want to talk to people. I. I was happy just to talk to the milk cow. And one thing led to the next and, you know, I got connected with the neighbor across the street. As I, as I wrote in that story, he was training for the Citadel. He was going to be going to the Citadel, which is down in South Carolina, the military academy. And I had a sports background and he was like, well, can you help me train for this? And so I would go on runs with him in the morning and just that connection, even though it's not been like a long stand friendship with him, but it's what God provided at that point in my life. And it started with the milk cow.

[B]

So you both share a lot of your stories in this book, Jeff. You talk about, you know, like you're the black sheep of the neighborhood and you're talking about, you know, like where the kids playing and, and bringing everybody together. There's a story about the lawnmower with the extension cord and a. In a home on an apron. I've never even heard that saying before. You talk about your grandpa at what point where, you know, obviously you become friends. This is, this new friendship. At what point along the way where you're like, we should write a book together. I think there's a lot of friends that have friendships that don't end up taking that. I mean, probably most.

[D]

Right, right. Yeah. That's not exactly on the bingo card of being, being friends, I don't think, in our culture. But we found it. You know, Ty had this idea.

[C]

He.

[D]

He came to me at a church event a little over three years ago now and, wow, gosh, three and a half years ago now. And we were talking about community and small group ministry, some of those things at church that night. And, and so it was kind of on his mind and he, and he came up and he was talking to me about this idea of party in the front and how he had this idea for a book to share. This idea of simple, practical, fun ways to connect with our neighbors and build relationships where we are, where we live. And I just love that idea, you know, party in the front. This idea of kind of like the reverse. The reverse mullet. Right. Business in the back. Party in the front. And I said, you know, well, background is in journalism. I actually went to school for journalism and then took the very natural path of sports journalism to pastoring a church, because that's what everyone does, right? And. But I still, I love to write and I've always wanted to write a book.

[B]

Are you the pastor? You're the pastor of the church?

[D]

Yes, I'm, I'm one of the pastors here. So I, I just jumped at it like, I would love to write a book with you, Ty. Like, I'll give it a shot. And he was crazy enough to say, okay, let's do it. And so this started a, a three year journey of, of researching and writing this book. And it kind of, you know, took on a life of its own as we got into the project. But it all started with just a conversation in the church lobby.

[B]

I love it because we so often just do things. If you have a home and you have yards, we so often do things in the back. And so there's a website party in the front, book.com. there's also social media party in the front book. And I'll make sure, I'll put the links in the show notes. This isn't exactly a party. But Jeff, you did talk in the book about your grandpa and how he just had this practice of being on the front porch. And I think there was, I'd read it somewhere. So I don't know how accurate it is, but, like, there is a trend in architecture to get rid of the front porches, but now people are wanting to bring them back. Can you talk about your grandpa and. And how even though he was maybe like, not this like, super outgoing, friendly guy, he's like, gone through the war, but he really did know his community just from having time on the porch?

[D]

Yeah, exactly. So my grandfather, Grampy Don is what we called him, and yeah, World War II veteran. He actually was a paratrooper in world to over France. Just amazing stories. He had scars on his arms from the shrapnel that hit him when he jumped into France a couple of different occasions. And so, yeah, definitely a lot of hardship in his life and scars literally and figuratively. And so he wasn't the easiest guy necessarily to get to know, but he would spend so much of his days on the front porch on this old rusty yellow swing on the. On the front porch of their house in this little northern Colorado town. And I don't think I even realized until I was a little bit later in high school. I'd go and mow the lawn for them for my. My grandma and grandpa. And he was just always out there, and I would just watch him and, you know, waving at everyone that came by and, and saying hello. And he knew people's names and everyone knew him, you know, hey, Don. Hey, Don. And. And it just really struck out, stuck out to me, like you said, because he wasn't the most engaging, outgoing person, but the key for him was simply being present. He was just there. And he knew so much in the stories he could tell about what happened on their street, in their neighborhood. He would know the high school was just down the street, and he would know things that were happening at the high school before probably the teachers did there. You know, I was like, yeah, they're. They're remodeling a bathroom at the high school. You know, just amazing things like that.

[B]

And.

[D]

And so as we were writing this book, I of course thought of that, of Grampy Don and his example of just being there, being present. And that really is half the battle.

[B]

Yeah, he was allowing people to be known.

[C]

Yep.

[B]

Yeah, he wrote about. He knew, you know, when the babies are born and when were friendships restored. And I think in a day and age where people are. Don't feel very known, you know, what a thing, what a thing to have all this background knowledge just from being out on the porch. So this is actually about moving into the front but also about just small gestures. Like an example would be Ty, you talked about running and giving someone a high five. Like, that's a very small example. But like, people really like that.

[C]

Yeah, we, like, I think that's the part where we try to spark joy in wherever you are. I just, I, I don't do this to everyone that walks by me or everyone that I run by, but it is fun. Like you can kind of get the, you know, get an idea 10ft away from someone if you're running toward them and like, hey, just put your hand up. If they put their hand up, it's just fun. Like just a little way to spark joy. And. And I think people then you kind of have a reputation in your neighborhood of like someone being approachable and just. Yeah. Someone that they can talk to.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. So there's all these like, specific, different ideas that you can try. Like, like the pancake breakfast idea was a cool one. Just idea after idea, neighborhood nerf battle. But then also kind of sandwiched this book with starting off with a story. Now this wasn't your story, but this is from Kelly. And she said that they were going to have a concert at their house, which actually is such a cool idea. Like you can, if you have friends that are musicians, but they're not like that big yet. Yeah, you're like, maybe you could have a concert at your actual home and invite people. And so this one ended up coming to the front yard. So can you talk about why you chose that as a starting story? I think it's fantastic. And they ended up inviting the neighbors.

[C]

Well, Kelly was such a instrumental part in getting this launched for us. She was just the person that we needed to blow wind into our sails. And so she knew about the project way before we started really writing. And so then when she started doing things in her neighborhood, she's just kept thinking about it. So then she kept sending us text messages and sharing things that they were doing. And then we asked her if she would write the, the intro here. So, yeah, with, with her, I think it was her grand granddaughter, Sydney was just, you know, so excited about doing this and going door to door and just really inviting people. And it was like a last minute thing. I think for that concert. They were going to do it in the backyard. They moved it to the front. They sent Sydney out. She made these handwritten notes for the neighbors. And who can say no to that? So then it just really started to, yeah. Break down some barriers probably in their neighborhood.

[D]

And.

[C]

And really it's now an Annual thing.

[B]

So, yeah, I liked it. You know, I thought it was such a cool story because she brings in these brothers, John and Terry Lindsley, and they have this home concert and she invites the people in the neighborhood. And then like the next year he's on. One of them is on American Idol.

[C]

Yep.

[B]

You would never know.

[D]

So what a cool thing.

[B]

And then they came back.

[C]

Yep.

[B]

Yeah. Even though that they were more famous now, they came back. So that was a great kickoff to this book. Just about thinking of things differently, like move to a space where people will see you and so that you can start to build relationships more deeply. Jeff, your house, actually, and I've never heard the word apron, but your house is like sort of the way that it's set up. It. It's conducive to doing a lot of things out front.

[D]

Yeah. And I think we need to like, maybe our next book just explores the history of the apron. Because, you know, I. I've actually always called it an eyebrow. And then we found out that doesn't exist. I'm the only person in the world apparently, that calls an eyebrow, Apparently.

[B]

What is it? I've never heard the word apron or eyebrow.

[D]

It's just a private, not even really private, but a little street off of the main street that our house and our neighbors houses live on. So it's just a little. Little mini street that's kind of attached. And so if you look above the neighborhood, I guess it looks like an eyebrow. That's what it looks like. But anyways, I don't think it looks anything.

[B]

The main street is the nose.

[D]

Exactly. Yes. And then you have.

[B]

It's better than apron.

[D]

Exactly. I think so too. But our editor wanted us to go with apron. So listen to her. But we love our editor.

[B]

I mean, you could have also gone with mini street.

[D]

Yeah, mini street. Exactly.

[B]

Eyebrow would have definitely been confusing.

[C]

Tributary.

[D]

There you go. But anyways, the point is. So this was actually fall of 2019. We moved to our. Our new neighborhood. And that was one of the things we loved about this house, honestly, was this apron or eyebrow. Because we thought, oh, it's just a little bit safer. You're not on the main drag, you know, and the kids can play outside. We didn't know, of course, that a few months later Covid was going to hit and everything was going to get locked down and you know, our kids were going stir crazy for all of us and they wanted to be outside. But what was fascinating is such a shift from our previous home. Our kids wanted to be in the front instead of the back. And so, and I think it's all because of, because of the apron, because they had this awesome space to ride bikes and roller skates and get the chalk out and make chalk art. And then they were seeing people, which they were like, you know, other people, like, social interaction. They were so excited. And all of a sudden I realized it hit me like we are meeting all of our neighbors out here, like, you know, having conversations. And people, you know, especially then during those crazy Covid days, were so hungry for that. And like within it, within a span of a few months, we had had more, I would say, neighborhood neighbor interactions than we had ever had previously. And so it just was this real kind of a, a light that went off for us of like, man, so much of it again is just being out front. It'd be so easy to just be in the backyard and playing around. Just that simple shift to the front yard changed everything for us.

[A]

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[B]

okay, if

[A]

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[B]

I love what you called that. You say it was quite the bright spot in our neighborhood because people are passing by and then they're senior kids out there and everyone is looking for relationships. What are your thoughts on where we're at in terms of loneliness? It was interesting because there was a book that you brought up called Bowling Alone, which I've never read, but I've obviously heard of. And I didn't realize until I read your book Party in the Front that people would attribute what's happening in society. Like it goes back decades.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, I would have thought, okay, Bowling Alone. Well, yeah, in 2015, people stopped bowling because they're on their phones. But this is talking about an accelerated rate of. Of breakdowns of relationships and cultural sort of norms in societies all the way back to the 70s.

[D]

Yes.

[B]

And really starting in the, like, they are measuring from 1950s to 1990s. There's these statistics that are just staggering. So it really has been dropping for quite a long time.

[D]

Exactly. And, and yeah, that, that book, actually, I remember that book being something I read in high school for one of our art classes. Yeah, I read Bowling Alone the first time. And so when we started writing this, I was like, I need to go back to that book.

[C]

Book.

[D]

And it is fascinating. And. And he, he traces Robert Putnam, who wrote that book, traces the trends that. That happened. Yeah. As you're saying, kind of post World War II. Which again, is interesting. Thinking about Grampy Don. Right. In his era and then like 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s, and how there was just this sharp drop off of social interaction, things like bowling clubs. And we always talk about, oh, what's, what's it called? Probably the card game. Bunco or the other one.

[C]

Bridge.

[D]

Bridge, yeah, Bridge clubs. We talk about bridge a lot. I don't even know. I don't even know what an apron is. I don't know what bridge is. But, you know, these card games that people would meet and play together and clubs and everything just started to sharply decline kind of. Yeah. In that 70s, 80s timeframe. And so you're reading this and then, you know, the advance of television sets, you know, and how, you know, from like the, the explosion from the 50s to, like, by the 1990s, almost every home in America had a television set in it. How that was changing social interaction. And we went to different places for entertainment and those types of things. And then, yeah, you read this book, which is still very, very relevant. I would recommend it to anyone that wants to explore this. And you realize he's Writing all this before the Internet becomes a thing. Right. And it's, like, mind blowing. It's like, oh, my gosh. So we really explore in the book, and we really have found in our research and just talking to people that I think the Internet just poured gasoline on the flames that were already there and really sped up some of those trends that we were already seeing of people doing less and less with others and certainly in neighborhoods. That's true. Just people going from knowing the neighbors around them and doing things together and kids playing together, to now a majority of Americans saying they don't know their neighbors at all.

[B]

Yeah. So, Ty, it's interesting because the two of you, you meet at church, you're maybe at a church event when you're like, hey, I've got this idea for a book. What is it that caused or allowed you to see? Because you probably had pretty good community, I would imagine, that allowed you to see that this was, like, a larger problem.

[C]

Yeah, that's a great question. And just the context of kind of how I'm wired. I'm very much an extrovert, so a lot of those sort of awkward, potentially awkward conversations could come more natural to me or just. I just don't care. But so reaching out to neighbors wasn't, like, a big thing for me. But when we moved to our new neighborhood in 2021, we noticed that it was just harder to reach to neighbors and reach out to them and get meaningful conversations. And so it wasn't until we. I got our Blackstone griddle from a parent as a housewarming gift, and we initially put it in the back, like I would say most people do. And then we just thought, hey, let's put it out front and let's have some pancakes and see who shows up. And so then that was just such a hit. We just had so many great conversations that one morning, and that was the first summer that we were in our new house, and that just kind of started a thing for our neighborhood. And it was just really the catalyst for the book idea. And then me reaching out to Jeff, and here we are.

[B]

Yeah, those Blackstones are pretty incredible, aren't they?

[C]

Oh, I. I don't know if I'll ever have a normal grill anymore. I'd make everything on that.

[B]

Like, look, I can make 600 pancakes at one time.

[C]

Seriously.

[B]

Do you know, I got to interview this man. His name is Chef Nathan Lippy, and I would just like to say that name, but he is their chef. He's the Blackstone, like, main top Chef. And he does, like, all their social media content. And I got to interview him and he told me this story about how when he was a little kid, he liked to cook, but his family didn't like to cook, but his mom gave him a lot of freedom. And he was like 8 or 9 years old or something like that. 10. He was young and his mom, like, left to go run some errands and he was home alone and he made homemade ravioli based off of, like watching Martha Stewart. He said he made it, like from scratch, like flour and the. Well, with the egg and the. Anyway, the whole thing. And he said his mom came home and was like, shock, shocked by the mess. But also said, you made this. This is one of the best things I've ever tasted. And he said that changed his whole life.

[C]

Wow, that's so cool.

[B]

He had a cool story.

[D]

That's cool.

[B]

Yeah. And he was like, this is what I want to do for the rest of my life. Now he's a chef at Blackstone, and I interviewed him and didn't know this was going to happen. But then they sent us the pizza oven.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[D]

That's amazing.

[B]

It is amazing. It's so cool. So I love that the Blackstone is really a way. Because one of your ideas in here that I brought up earlier is the pancake breakfast. So can you talk about. I mean, if you have the Blackstone, that's really going to help out. You literally would just send out RSVPs. I think people would almost be scared to do this. We're hosting a pancake breakfast on Saturday from 8 in the morning to 9:45. That's a pretty small time commitment, right? It's less than two hours. Let us know by Wednesday if you can come. We'll provide pancakes, bacon, eggs cooked on the griddle. Have you actually done it?

[C]

Oh, yeah, yeah, that's how. That's how the first ones. I think that was probably my original text message to our neighbors for that. That very first pancake breakfast. So we like to say if you griddle it, they will come. And it's true. Like, I mean, who does that?

[B]

Sounds like something a dad would say.

[C]

So that was such a game changer. And, you know, food is just a great avenue for conversation and kind of lowers the bar, I think, for things. And. And so it was just a great entryway to better conversations with people in the neighborhood.

[B]

Do you feel like people overstayed?

[C]

Oh, I mean, there's always that person, right? It's like noon. It's like, hey, it's not even breakfast anymore.

[B]

Moving on to the next meal.

[C]

So we weren't going to soccer practice or whatever.

[B]

Did you see that ended at 9:45? Yeah, I can see that. But if you had. If you had something else that you had to go do, then maybe.

[D]

Yeah, I think that that's kind of a. That's kind of a. A secret advantage, though, of doing the party out front. Right. There's a little bit more of a like, hey, we're going inside. Unless they, I guess they could follow you. At least there's some sort of separation. Like, well, we're tearing down and going inside. Like, we'll see you next Saturday.

[C]

Oh, well, we've. Oh, go ahead. Sorry.

[B]

No, you go.

[C]

Well, I was gonna say just the fact of doing something out front. If you only know, like, the names of your neighbors, they kind of know who you are, but they don't know anything about you, really. If you do something in the back, there's kind of that, I don't know, that unknown that would probably keep some people away. But doing it in the front, it's like, if something's gonna happen, everyone's gonna know about it. And so it was just a really easy ask, I think, for people just to come. We kept our garage door open and we put. We brought tables from the church and we had chairs and it's just an easy thing. Yeah. So we literally, like staged like a. A breakfast out front and we've done that a number of times now.

[B]

I love that I only know one other person who attends a church where, like, the things that they own are able to use in the community. A Be able. I don't know how I didn't say it right, but, like, you're able to borrow the stuff for like your baby shower that you're having. I was like, oh, that's actually a really cool idea because you may not have all that stuff and you don't have a place to store it. I've heard a couple really cool pancake ideas. You're. This is a cool pancake idea. Saturday morning, bring your families 8 to 9:45. There was a pancake idea that I heard about where. Well, they did waffles, but it's kind of like the same thing. They did waffles at 10 on Friday nights for the. After football games. Cool. Instead of kids going to like, parties or going to drink or whatever, and they like, they just get tons of milk and tons of pancakes. And then I heard one where a grandma did it for her grandson and his friends before school. Once week. And he was like a teenager and like the kids didn't have maybe strong relationships. And they would come. She was a really good cook. And the grandson wanted to like show off his grandma's cooking. So the kids would come. And then he got killed tragically in like an accident or something like that. And the kids, all his friends still wanted to come for breakfast and they still came for like, you know, in perpetuity, all this, like groups of kids. So I love this idea about the pancakes. I mean, it really is such an easy anything. It can be fairly cost effective. If you don't like that idea though, Jeff, you talk about popsicle night. Here's another one.

[D]

Yeah. Yep. Yeah. So my wife gets so much credit. She, she brings the party to the front in our, in our house on our apron. And you know, she, she's so good at just creative and simple ideas to connect with people. And so this was, I think maybe the first summer that we lived in our new house. And she said, you know, I'm just gonna get a cooler out in the front at one afternoon evening and just put some popsicles in it and just put a sign up. And for people walking by with their kids just like, hey, free popsicles. And, and, and so many people stopped and had conversations and it wasn't just like, oh, grab a popsicle and go. Like people were wanted to meet us and you know, talk about our kids and our kids started playing with other kids. And then that kind of began to blossom. And the next time that she did it, we actually did it at the park that's kind of across the street from. From us. And, and we had like 70 people come and show up for popsicle night. And so now it's actually grown into. We actually do full on neighborhood parties once or twice a year where we've had over a hundred people come and it all just started with, yeah, a cooler full of popsicles. And so, you know, whether it blows up into a whole neighborhood, neighborhood wide thing or not, just the simple act of, of having something for people, something fun, something that connects people. And I think utilizing your kids, honestly, that, that's a, that's a weird way to say it, but like, your kids are such a great way to bridge connections with your neighbors, especially if your neighbors have kids and even if they don't. One of the things we've noticed, in fact, just this last weekend we did a little Valentine's Day lemonade stand because it's been weirdly warm in Colorado this winter and so many, you know, Folks stop by, even older folks and, and adults who just want to see our kids play, you know, and just kind of, oh, hey, we always drive by here and see you guys. What's your story? And, and so, you know, our kids really are one of, one of the, the best ways to make connections with people around us. And our kids love it as well. They get so into it. They were the ones this last Saturday, like, hey, can we do we do eliminate stand. In fact, fact, my. One of my daughter's friends Who's I think 10 years old, I was kind of waffling because we had had a busy day. I was like, I don't know if today is a good day for a lemonade stand. Also. It's February. But she comes up to me. Yeah, she comes up to me, Jenny, and she says, she looks at me, she's like, pastor Jeff, it's a party in the front. And I'm like, oh man, you just pulled that card. And then I couldn't say no. So anyways, all of that, the popsicle, the lemonade stand, just like simple, fun things involving our kids. And, and man, it's, it's really something that's, that's grown into really changing, I think, the feel of our neighborhood.

[B]

Yeah, I think that's really important. I read a book recently called hold on to your kids by Gordon Neufeld and Gabber. I think it's pronounced mate. And it's really the premise that kids are supposed to spend a lot of time around adults and adults that care for them and that we've lost that with extended family and with community. And I was, it was a really eye opening book. I mean, I read it really recently and I think when you brought that up about, you know, it doesn't matter that it's kids or not kids, it's just like this is community. And then there's a lot of adults that know you, that know your family and that strengthens everyone. It's good for everyone. It's good for everyone when there's kids around. And it's good for the kids, kids to have these adults around too. So you say small steps make a big difference. The baked goods you deliver to your neighbor will be remembered for at a minimum days. But you know, I mean, it could be remembered for a really long time. I have my friend Danielle on this podcast and she is a chef and she's on Next level chef, which is a cool thing. So she's on the show as a home chef and she has some cookbooks and she Told the story about that. That she was making a cookbook page of, like, short ribs or something like that. And her neighbor, they, like, walked by and they were like, oh, that smells really good. She, like, didn't know the neighbor very well, so she decided, though, that when she was done, she was going to take them the food. And then the guy died. And it turned out that. That her meal was his last meal.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

And, like, he loved it. It was just so. I mean, I guess that's a story where he wouldn't be remembering it even for days because he wasn't alive anymore, though. But the wife or the partner, whoever she was, the girlfriend or like, she remembered it and it was, like, so meaningful. Now it's in a book. So I. I love that. This is about these small things that you can do. There's so many lists in here. You know, just put your picnic table in the front yard. Even just taking your dog for a walk. Can you take your air pods out? And there's seasonal party ideas in here as well. Several page pages of them. Then you talk about this guy named Dude. Dude, Dude.

[A]

Dad.

[B]

That. He's got a lot of ideas, too.

[C]

I. Taylor Calmus.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Shout out, Taylor.

[B]

Shout out to Taylor. I don't know Taylor, but he sounds like a cool guy. He's got good ideas for, like, for connecting.

[C]

They built a patio before they did their addition on their. The front of their house. They actually live in Fort Collins and they've got a lot of followers and Taylor's a. Taylor and Heidi are great, but they. They had a big patio out front and they just, just. They utilized that. And they were doing s' mores out front and they live on a cul de sac. And yeah, I. Even when I was over at their house a couple months ago, I saw that they had a pickleball court. Like, the lines drawn in there. Like, they just do stuff out all their. Out front all the time. So they're good.

[B]

I love it. I love it. Yeah. So you can go there for inspiration. Okay. This is a trigger spot for me because we have a really poor history with the local church. And in fact, we were kicked out of church, but you talk about it in the book. So we were kicked out of church a year and a half ago. Like, kicked out. Like, who gets kicked out of church? We didn't do anything but send in letters of concern about the youth pastor. We all did. I've got five kids, so everybody sending a letter of concern. He just, like, wreaked havoc on our family. There Were things that he was doing that weren't biblical. Anyway, we got kicked out. They said we got kicked out via certified letter in the mail. I was like, oh, what would Jesus do? That's what he would do. He'd kick you out. And they said that we were gossips and that we had stretched the fabric of the community. It was an awful letter, like, wrapped in Christianese. And then six months later, seven months later, the guy got caught as a pedophile. Yeah, it's like, so it's been so awful for our kids and, like, shocking. And then sometimes I'm like, am I just dumb? Like, there's so many worse things. But it really shook our family. And I think the lasting impacts are like, even some of our kids are like, well, I don't even know if any of these friendships are making our real friendships. Like, if something happened, would they still be around? So anyway, it was interesting to read in your book about drop in church attendance, because I was like, oh, well, we're seven people.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

And we have, you know, and we haven't really figured it out. And I, I, I get nervous and I think maybe this would be a great thing for you to address. You talk about, like, I sometimes feel like people are pawns. That's actually, if I were to look back at my adult church attendance, I, I would almost feel like that's what I would say. I feel like I was a pawn in a system where someone made their money. It's gonna sound so, I don't know. Jaded.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, because we were, I mean, we were really involved in church over the years. Like, we did all the ministries except for the parking lot one. But, like, we ran, you know, small groups for youth group and small groups for church. And we did the worship team and, you know, we just were really involved, worked in the kids classes and like, when push comes to shove, like, we didn't matter. So this is one of the things that you talk about in the book, that there's been a drop in church attendance, a pretty significant drop. And you say it was actually pretty interesting to read. You wrote, as the church growth movement has increased in influence, church attendance begins to decline. We talked about online church, which to me, those words don't really go together if the church, you know, it's interesting. That's an interesting new thing. Right. I guess where I struggle is, is, is the format of it in some ways a little dangerous because you have someone who's kind of worshiped who surrounded, like a pastor. Right. Who's surrounded by A lot of people who maybe are getting their value from being. I don't think you knew that this was going to go here.

[C]

Thank you for.

[B]

Okay, this is what, this is what I see. And then we get nervous. Like, we've to, like, step back in, but we're like, this feels shaky because it does. It feels like as an institution, it's not super safe. And there have been so many instances in our area of, like, this guy was the worship pastor, had a pen camera, and he was like, videoing people in the bathroom. And then the other youth pastor, 60 counts of, you know, child sexual assault. And then the youth pastor that was here that moved to Ohio, he was videotaping people at the gym, and he's married with the kid. And now how the police got involved there. And so it just feels like there's not a lot of accountability and that a lot of these pastors are surrounded by people who just don't hold them accountable.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

And to go.

[D]

Yeah. No, thank you, Jenny, for. For bringing this up. And, and first of all, like, I'm so sorry for what you guys experienced with this church. Like, that is. That is really hard and sad, and I'm sorry that that happened. And, you know, I think actually our. One of our other pastors here just. Just preached about it this past Sunday. We're in the book of First John, and there's so much in there about fellowship. Koinonia is the Greek word. And this idea of what is. What does genuine fellowship relationship look like?

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

And, you know, and he just acknowledged from the pulpit, like, there's so much church hurt. Hurt in our culture today. And. And he raised his hand, like, including me, you know, like, so.

[B]

Sure.

[D]

So much of us, even in leadership, have experienced things. And. And it's really sad. And. And I think a couple things, you know, one. One, obviously, you know, one of the things that we tell people who come to our church is we're not a perfect church. You know, and. And if you're a perfect person joining our church, you should probably not come because you'll, you know, we're gonna. We're gonna mess you up. Or if you think we're perfect, you know, you're. You're. You're probably gonna mess us up because no one is perfect. And. And there's going to be messiness in anything.

[B]

But Jeff, I hate this. And here's why. Because I feel like, okay, I want to push back on it just a little bit.

[D]

Sure.

[B]

That's what everybody says.

[D]

Yep.

[B]

Church is filled with the broken People. Okay, yes, I get it.

[D]

Yep.

[B]

But my concern is that for pastoral staff, God has a different standard. And it's not perfect. It's not. It is above reproach. And so what I see and am and seeing is that there sometimes are people that are on staff at a church that are not above reproach. Like, so this man who was like this in his 40s as youth pastor, he wasn't above reproach. Like, he said things that were inappropriate. He made decisions that weren't in alignment with scripture or the, the worship pastor. That was video. This is a different church. But, like, was videotaping people with his pen camera in the bathroom. Bathroom. Like other people had said, well, he swore all the time. And I'm like, okay, well, that's not above reproach. No one's looking for you to be perfect, but if you're not above reproach, then you shouldn't be in a pastoral spot. And I think that's often where the breakdown happens and that's where often the church, like, there's really long lasting ramifications. It's because that person was expected to be a pastor, a shepherd, a spiritual leader, and nobody held them accountable. And so then it shattered relationships. I don't think anybody's looking for perfect. I think they're looking for honest.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, and I, I, the, this church, you know, I mean, obviously it's like, obviously he shed, she shed situation.

[A]

But like, they lied.

[B]

They said they did a whole investigation and found that their staff, you know, was full of integrity. And I'm like, well, what was the investigation then? But they won't tell, you know, who, who did the investigation? How is a pedophile, you know, shown to be like, this person of integrity? Did you look at his computer? You know, that type of thing. And so I also think that there was the opportunity for them to repair, like when they found out that he was not a pastor, then they should come back and help us restore our community and say, we're very sorry you got caught in the middle of.

[D]

Right.

[B]

This is the person that we hired to watch after children. He is a pedophile. Whether he gets criminally charged or not, you know, these are the things that we know. This is his Internet search history. We had him working with children. Your people's tithe dollars went to pay for his salary. So there was, there's none of that. I don't, I mean, I'm not trying to push back hard, but I just kind of hate. The church is filled with broken People.

[D]

Well, here's, here's where, here's where I was going to go with that, that, because that's, those are all great points, Jenny. And, and yeah, absolutely. Pastors are held to a, a higher standard and should be. And you know, we're going to give an account to God for how we shepherd our people and care for our people. And those people who have done these things to you will face judgment from God, I believe, for, for what they've done. And that doesn't, that doesn't excuse it or make, make people feel better. But yeah, definitely, I mean, yeah, I

[B]

definitely, like, I think the, the parable of the guy that has $20 and gets his debt, you know, the person that gets his debt paid of millions of dollars and then he goes and strangles the guy for $20. I mean, I, I, I'm not, you know, I, not trying to be like. And we're some perfect people either. We're certainly not. We have all of our own sin. So.

[D]

Yep. Well, I think it comes down to then that back to this idea of coin and true fellowship. Right. Because I think this is where it ties into what we're talking about here, which is that, that we have to be in true authentic relationship with one another. And as you said, we have to be in a place where people, where we can bring things to the light. Right. And we can address sin and we can hopefully help each other and bring accountability and consequences before things get way worse and the consequences become so much greater. And so for me as a pastor, and it's so interesting that you're bringing this up, Jenny, because I'm preaching in First John 1, 5, 10 this week, and it's all about this idea of bringing what's in the darkness to the light. And we cannot walk with darkness and say we have fellowship with God or with each other. And so God takes our sin very seriously and yes, at an even higher level for pastors and leaders in the church. But I think one thing that I feel convicted of as a pastor is to make sure that I have relationships at a pastoral team. And our network here really believes in a plurality of pastors. So we have always multiple pastors who have equal authority. There's no senior pastor. We all, and we all hold each other accountable. Now that doesn't mean that there can't still be problems, but, but we genuinely press into to know each other, to confess sin with each other, to call each other out when we do get off, off the page. And that's where I think this Idea of fellowship becomes so important in relationship. Do we have people in our lives, whether we're pastors or not, who know the messiness that we can share our struggles with and that will hold us accountable and encourage us to be the people that God's called us to be? We need that desperately. And I think that's why we put that in the book, because I think our concern. And it is really fascinating that as churches have gotten bigger and more kind of systematized, I would say attendance has gone down and people's feeling of connection, generally, like genuine connection in the church has decreased. And I don't think that's. I don't think that's an. An accident. I think those two things are connected well.

[C]

And I. I'd love to add just that we talk about isolation being a weapon of Satan and when. And you know, the irony of your situation, too, and I'm so sorry that that happened, is that that pastor was isolated. I mean, clearly he didn't have people speaking into his life. He wasn't in fellowship with people to be able to call out things that they're seeing, or if he did, he kicked them out, you know, and so unfortunately, you saw things happening. And yeah, it. So that there's just huge ramifications of that. And so when. When people are isolated, people. Humanity is led to despair, you know, just because of all of the. The effects of that. And I think where we want to go with the book is like, what we're trying to. We're trying to speak into that. That depravity and the isolation and loneliness because there are so many people affected by that.

[B]

That.

[C]

And if we. If our homes can once again be a tool for connection and inviting people back in that have been straight, like strays, like, I. This is a little bit crude, but you think about like a dish of milk out on the front porch for, you know, like animals, you know, like. Like. Like people did that or do that because, like, there are strays. And like, the church has. The church has strays too. And. And like, our homes can once again be like a pancake breakfast. Could be like the. The. The bowl of milk.

[D]

Sure.

[C]

Or lack of better word out in your neighborhood for people that are hurt. And that's. That. That is why we wrote the book, is for the people just like what you're going through that are just hurt and probably won't step into a church or for a while, but they might come to a pancake breakfast in your front yard. So I'm so sorry that. That happened.

[B]

Thanks. I, I like that. I think that the, that sort of premise that you just said really does shine through in the book. It's not a very churchy book. Jeff, I didn't know you were pastor until you said it just now. I probably should have read closer in the bio. I tend to not read the bios, I just read the books. So I actually didn't know until you even said that. I, maybe it doesn't even say it. It doesn't say it. Jeff and Ty are friends and passionate advocates for building authentic community right where you live. That's a different, a different, I guess, message. It's a different outlook of, of saying like, let's start with the neighbors and bring people in that way. It's really interesting. I didn't know. Yeah, and I think I didn't overlook it either.

[D]

I don't think I, I think that's actually how the early church began in, in large part is actually in house churches and neighborhoods and, and, and, and just one on one connections with the people around you and you know, even Jesus himself, you know, and, and yeah, we, we were intentional. The gospel is very much in the book, but we don't want it to be preachy. Yeah, but we do, you know, we are motivated personally by the gospel and what we see in scripture and in the life and ministry of Jesus. And, and I think it's just so interesting and instructive that Jesus did not call these 12 disciples to, to him and say, all right, let's, let's do a class once a week, you know, on Sundays for a couple hours. Bring your, bring your things, do your homework and then we'll see you, you know, we'll see you next week. He said, come follow me. Let's live together, let's walk together, let's eat together, let's serve people in need together. And that's how he, he imprinted on them. He built community with them, he built fellowship with them. And I think. So I think you're onto something, Jenny, because we've lost a lot of that in the Western church. And, and I think there's a lot of churches and Christians around the world who, who do it more that way, I think. But, but we don't see that a lot here. So I think that's where we have to really, as Ty saying, be creative and go beyond the walls of the church, literally the physical walls, and then sometimes those walls of just how we typically do things. Things. What we think of when we think of the church and mission and evangelism and all those churchy words that we use to just say, let's get back to just loving people right where we are and being the hands and feet of Jesus to the people that are right around us in practical ways. And so, yeah, that's what we're passionate about.

[B]

Huh? I'm intrigued. Yeah, I'm intrigued because I didn't know the backstory, but I did think it was really applicable. And I also thought it was really. I don't know what the word would be, but, like, I think some people are ignoring it. And what you say. What you say is. You say our culture is becoming less and less inclined to view the church and religion as a good or necessary thing. People are less. You. You go there. I think you say the things that it's, like, actually happening, but nobody really wants to talk about. People are less inclined to view Christianity or the church as capable of answering their biggest question and responding to their most challenging needs. And so the premise, you know, I. What. One of the big things I get from the book is to start. To start with the people that are around you. So, yeah, I think that. That maybe that seemed like that was your intent, and you did a really good job with it of. Of sort of planting the seed that in some cases, the. If. The. If it's broken, ways that we can fix it are just in our own lives, in our own communities, and with these small steps that we can share and build relationships with the people that are around us. You use this acronym bless. And I liked this idea of just. I was like, is this a little creepy? I don't totally know. I can't decide. I think I like it. I like it, but it's just about, like, use. Here's the idea. Idea. Printing out a Google satellite map of your neighborhood. And it sounds creepy when you say it, but also it. It also is like, this is a really good idea.

[C]

Yeah. Practical.

[B]

If you. Yeah, it's so practical if you print out this map and then you start to kind of keep track of who's who, where. Who's where, what's going. It's basically what Grampy Don did, but less with less technology. So, you know when you start to pray for people and learn what they like. So. So this BLESS acronym is in here. One of the things that I really liked was the conversation starters. There's like a whole page of them on page 176 and eating. So there's that. I guess I don't really have a

[A]

question to ask you about it, but

[B]

I did really like the bless idea. There's a lot in this book. Look at all my notes.

[D]

I know. I'm impressed. Thank you for reading it. And yeah, I mean, I, I think the bless strategy is. Is just such a practical starting point for people if.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

You know, if you don't know where to begin. And so the B stands with. With begin with prayer. And even if you're not a person of faith, like. Yeah. Just the idea of. Of knowing the people around you and that's the idea behind the Google map, is not. Not to spy on anyone. We're not encouraging spy. But to. Do you actually know the name of the. The guy that lives down the street in the blue house? You know, like, yeah, like, pay attention and, And. And see. Okay. Yeah, that's. That's Joe. And. Oh, he usually goes for a walk, you know, on Saturdays. And, you know, you just start to learn some things like, And. And. And out of care, you know, to want to. To want to care for people and, and get to know them. And so starting with that and then listening and. And just hearing people's stories. The E is our favorite, one of our favorites because it's just eat with people. That's the whole idea. Yeah. Because food. G, gather. So it's just some practical steps not to make it again overly systematic, but to just kind of help you in your mind think about, okay, how can I start to take some steps to get to know the people around me?

[C]

Yeah, you end. You ended the word blah again.

[D]

Yeah, I did. I always do that. The S mean the first S is serve. So how can you serve them? You know, my kids, I get them out to. To shovel snow for our elderly neighbors.

[A]

Awesome.

[D]

What's that? That's also an S. Yep. That's really good.

[B]

That's actually really good for their proprioception. I mean, it really actually, like, that heavy work is so good for kids. Shelving. So is so good for you. And then as the other S is share. Someone said it was someone's wife, and I'm not quite sure whose wife it was, but they said, and I think this applies to everything that we've talked about. It wasn't broken overnight, so it won't be fixed overnight. And that goes, you know, in line with the bowling alone. It goes in live with. In line with some of the breakdowns that have happened in church culture, you know, Western church culture. And what you say is be optimistic. Perhaps nothing is in shorter supply today than optimism. And you say there's this, I don't know, like, this Definition of optimism is that the world, the world that we're in is the best of all possible worlds.

[C]

Worlds.

[B]

I was like, oh, I really like that so just a lot. The book is fantastic. It's called Party in the front. Overcome loneliness and build community right where you are. Thank you for listening to my breakdown about my church situation.

[D]

Thank you for sharing. Yeah.

[B]

And for giving thoughts about it. I think it's more. Someone said to me recently, like, it's. It's not really that common. And I was like, no, I actually think it's a little bit more common than. I don't know. And that might part in part be because of the Internet and because of how easy it is. Is to access things that are, like, in the dark. So I so appreciate it. I love the book and tons of ideas in here for you to build community. Community is core to what it means to be human. We always end our show with the same question. The question is, what's a favorite memory from your childhood that was outside?

[C]

I thought about that because I listened to your podcast. Mine is probably was 4 or 5 years old. I don't know why my dad let us do this, but it was pouring outside, and we had this stream next to our house, and we had this inflatable shark that you'd, like, use in a pool or whatever. And I mean, this stream went from like 6 inches of water consistently to like 6ft of rushing water. And my twin brother and I, Sam and older brother Scott, we were just having a ball. So I just remember just flying down that. That little stream now. River on the inflatable shark. Dark as a kid.

[B]

That's incredible.

[D]

Oh, man. Yeah. That's such a good question. I. I loved playing basketball as a kid, and we had a hoop in our. In our front driveway. And so my brother and I were out there all the time. And it makes me think of your. Your newest book, until the Streetlights Come On. Right. My wife's reading that right now. She's loving it, by the way. And there you go right here.

[B]

And so cool.

[D]

You know, we would play and. And our friends would come over. It was just kind of like, you know, open invitation. Come over and play if you can. And we would play, especially in those summer nights until we, like, couldn't see the hoop anymore. You know, it's like, well, I guess it's time to go in because we're shooting air balls and it can't be our talent. So I just remember those. Those nights and that connection. And as I think about it, like, yeah. This whole idea of party in the front, that was there from, from a young age for me.

[B]

Yeah. Wasn't it for both of you? You, the shark was probably in the front yard, right?

[C]

Oh, yeah. I have so many good memories.

[B]

The white water shark ride in the front yard and playing basketball. I love it. This is something that has been with you since you were children and you're bringing it back. The book is called Party in the Front, and you can find more at the website partyinthefront.com and Instagram Party in the Front on social media. And I'll make sure I'll tag in the show notes. Thank you. Thank you so much to the both of you for writing this, for talking about these really important issues, and for spending this hour with us.

[C]

Thank you, Jenny.

[D]

Thanks, Jenny.