Podcast Summary

Podcast: The Bible in a Year (with Fr. Mike Schmitz)
Episode: Day 112: True Friendship (2026)
Date: April 22, 2026
Host: Fr. Mike Schmitz (Ascension)

Episode Overview

This episode centers around the theme of true friendship, using the story of David and Jonathan from 1 Samuel 20 as its focal point. Fr. Mike explores the biblical depiction of deep, covenantal friendship and contrasts it against modern perceptions of love and friendship. He reflects on different types of love, referencing C.S. Lewis’s “The Four Loves,” and unpacks how this ancient story speaks to our longing for authentic, loyal companionship. The episode weaves in scriptural reading (1 Samuel 20, Psalm 142), commentary, and personal/prayer reflections.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Story: David and Jonathan’s Friendship

(Reading and context: 01:05–10:45)

• The dramatic episode of 1 Samuel 20 is read in full, highlighting the risks and depth of the bond between David and Jonathan as King Saul seeks David’s life.
• Jonathan and David devise a plan to discover Saul’s intentions and communicate any danger to David.
• The chapter culminates in a tearful goodbye and reaffirmation of their covenant and friendship—"for he loved him as he loved his own soul" (1 Samuel 20:17, read at 07:14).
• Memorable moment: Their final, emotional farewell—"David rose from beside the stone heap and fell on his face to the ground and bowed three times. And they kissed one another and wept with one another until David recovered himself" (08:56).

2. Psalm of Lament: Crying Out in Loneliness

(Psalm 142, 10:45–12:45)

• Fr. Mike reads Psalm 142, a prayer for deliverance, connecting it to feelings of loneliness and being pursued unjustly—mirroring David’s experience.
• Notable quote from the Psalm: “No refuge remains to me. No man cares for me. I cry to you, O Lord, I say, you are my refuge, my portion in the land of the living.” (Psalm 142:4–5, read at 11:48).

3. Types of Love: C.S. Lewis’ The Four Loves

(Commentary, 13:15–17:15)

• Fr. Mike reviews the four types of love as outlined by C.S. Lewis: Storge (affection), Eros (desire/romantic love), Philia (friendship), and Agape (divine self-giving love).
• He discusses how contemporary culture often misunderstands or reduces male friendship but reiterates that the friendship of David and Jonathan is an example of deep, virtuous companionship ("Philia"), not romantic or erotic love.
• Notable quote:

  “Scripture does not back away from the fact that they truly loved each other very, very much. And so in our 21st-century world ... when we hear about two men who love each other, we think, wait, that's weird. And it's not. ... It's not disordered love. ... It's the love of friendship.” — Fr. Mike (13:15)

The Four Loves Unpacked

• Storge: Love of affection (“I love pizza, I love my mom... that's Storge”—14:10)
• Eros: Love of desire, often romantic but can be distorted or fickle (“Eros is fickle...it's pretty cheap”—15:40)
• Philia: True friendship, rare and powerful (“True friendship...happens maybe once or twice in a person's life, if ever”—17:08)
• Agape: Self-giving, sacrificial love, realized most fully in Christ (John 3:16)
• Memorable moment: Fr. Mike humorously does a C.S. Lewis imitation describing storge using the imagery of “the bed of rice that you put your pad thai on” (14:25).

4. The Rarity and Power of True Friendship

(17:15–19:25)

• Fr. Mike highlights that while many experience affection (storge) and even desire (eros), very few will experience a genuine, virtuous, covenantal friendship (philia) like David and Jonathan.

• Memorable quote:

  “When it comes to true friendship, that happens maybe once or twice in a person's life, if ever, because it's so rare, it's so powerful, it's so precious.” — Fr. Mike (17:08)

• Emphasizes that such friendships are rooted in a shared pursuit of something bigger—virtue, faith, service to God.

5. The Perfect Love: Agape in Christ

(19:26–20:45)

• Agape, the highest form of love, comes to perfection in Jesus, who brings together all loves and elevates them through self-giving.
• Notable reflection:

  “God actually has eros for us as well...not erotic, but the love of desire...that moves a person out of themselves to give of themselves. ... Here's Jesus on the cross who's giving of himself. ... It all comes to perfection in the person of Jesus Christ, who loves us to the point of death, calls us his friends, and gives us his spirit.” — Fr. Mike (19:30, 20:31)

6. A Prayer for Friendship and the Lonely

(12:45–13:15; 21:00–End)

• Fr. Mike leads a heartfelt prayer, thanking God for the gift of friendship and praying for those who feel isolated or have never known true friendship.
• Notable quote:

  “We pray for every person who has ever loved us, even those who have not loved us like they should have ... we lift them up to you right now, Lord God. ... We also lift up before you every heart that is lonely, every heart that is isolated, every heart that does not ... has not known friendship. ... You belong to this community. And we belong to you, too. You're our friend.” — Fr. Mike (21:18, closing)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On 21st-century misunderstandings:

  “Scripture does not back away from the fact that they truly loved each other very, very much.... it's not disordered love. This is what we talked about yesterday, Philia, this love of friendship.” — Fr. Mike (13:15)

• On eros (desire/love):

  “Eros can be good, it's powerful, but also it could be silly. And also it's kind of cheap when it comes down to it.” (16:10)

• On friendship (philia):

  “True friendship ... happens maybe once or twice in a person's life, if ever, because it's so rare, it's so powerful, it's so precious.” (17:08)

• Encouragement to the lonely:

  “You are one of us. You belong to us. You belong to this community. And we belong to you too. We belong to you too. You're our friend.” (21:38)

Key Timestamps

• Scripture Reading (1 Samuel 20): 01:05–10:45
• Psalm 142: 10:45–12:45
• Prayer for friends & the lonely: 12:45–13:15, 21:00–End
• Commentary on the Four Loves: 13:15–17:15
• On the power & rarity of true friendship: 17:15–19:25
• Agape and Jesus’ love: 19:26–20:45
• Closing encouragement & sign-off: 21:00–End

Summary: Takeaways for Listeners

• The story of David and Jonathan exemplifies a rare, virtuous friendship—rooted in loyalty, shared purpose, and deep love (“Philia”).
• True friendship is precious but uncommon; many will not experience it, but it remains a profound biblical ideal.
• The episode encourages listeners to cherish existing friends, pray for the lonely, and look to Christ for the perfection of all love: storge, eros, philia, and agape.
• All, even those who feel unseen or unloved, are included—“You are one of us. ... You're our friend.”

For further reflection, listeners are invited to pray for all who experience loneliness and thank God for the friends who have shaped their lives, however few or imperfect. As always, Fr. Mike reminds the community to pray for each other as the year's journey continues.