B (3:08)

Well, I mean, and what we. I think the only way we're, like, making it through it is by, like, thinking about, like, everything happening at the exact same time. And it's kind of a year of pure hell is almost 2025. Yeah, 2025 is on our shit list forever. But, like, the concept of, you know, each of these things happening over the course of the next six to 10 years.

A (3:36)

Yeah, I'd rather do it. Yeah. It's like purging.

B (3:38)

Yeah, exactly. It's like.

A (3:40)

It's like, if you want to get your skin clear. Like, I'd rather go through three months of. Than have acne for the rest of my life.

B (3:45)

Yeah.

A (3:45)

And I'd rather go through a year of hell.

B (3:49)

Hell.

A (3:50)

And then, you know, get my life back. Have a healthy brain again.

B (3:56)

Healthy brain.

A (3:57)

Be happy.

B (3:58)

Yeah.

A (3:58)

Happiness. You know, it's like I was telling Tyler I thought I was so burnt out from work, but I was just, like, so depressed and miserable in my personal life that, like, it was bleeding into my work. And, like, you can't be happy when you don't have a happy home. And I was, like, in denial.

B (4:12)

Yeah.

A (4:15)

Because I was like, there's no way I'm gonna let a man affect my mood. You know, I'm stronger than that. But it's like, you know, you're. You are a product of your environment. You're a product of who you're friends with, what you listen to, what you talk to, who you marry. The energy that you're around does affect you. So. Yeah, I mean, there's some issues. Like, they fucked up the cabinets in one of the rooms. Then we're like, if y' all will move, have a new year, move in, if we fix them. And so we're, like, in the process of figuring out how the fuck to figure that out, because we've extended our lease three times, and the people that signed the lease after us have been so sweet and extended it for us, too, to the end of November so that we have more time, which is so nice. And so it's like, we can't. We don't have any more time. We're going to be homeless. And it's just sad because it's like this was supposed to be my silver lining and like, the happy thing. And it's like, I know with construction, like, you know, my head is not completely in the clouds, but I have to be realistic, like, there's going to be fuck ups. It just sucks because, like, I feel really guilty because I feel like I've had so much personal stuff going on that, like, I haven't been as focused on the little details of it, which I feel like I've done. I've done a lot. Like, I'm being really hard on myself. I've done so much. And I prepped honestly for a lot of this stuff. Like, I had prepped for years before we even, like, started building this space. Like, new branding and like, just my new vibes. Like, every, like, all my, like, things in my brain that like, I was conceptualizing, like, had already been done. So that was good. But it just like, I think the.

B (5:43)

I don't even think you can blame yourself for this one, because no matter what, a cabinet rendering was never going to be your strong suit until it was installed. You know what I mean? Like, I don't even think this is something where, like, you weren't paying attention one day or whatnot. Like, this is something that was unavoidable until you saw it in person, which unfortunately is less than eight weeks out from our deadline of needing to be moved in.

A (6:13)

Yeah. And it's like, you know, I want it to be perfect, especially since it's like, money wasn't an issue. You know, I like, put so much money into.

B (6:21)

And we've been at this for two years now, basically.

A (6:24)

Well, I mean, me, Maria, like, literally, like, she's been with me for almost four years now. And like, the day she started, like, we would on LoopNet looking for, like, spaces for new sba because y' all were already drowning. Yeah. And I was like, I want to be prepared. And so it's like, it just sucks to, like, get to it. And it's like we were supposed to be in there in July and now it's October and things are still not right. And, you know, I put so much blood, sweat, tears, vision into this and, like, you know, it just sucks. It's just like another thing after another. And it's like I just am at my capacity. I have like, stress hives. I don't even know if you can see it on video because I put makeup on, but I have stress hives all over my Chest and my face. I have brow hair falling out from stress. I can't sleep, can't eat. I can eat like two bites of food right now. It's just been, it's been a year. And you know, I don't want to be super negative, but like, also I don't want to fake it and like pretend to be super happy and you know, the new space is going to be great when it's done and things.

B (7:28)

Other updates, we, I am super excited we hired a social media manager.

A (7:37)

Jordan. She's so good, guys. Like, she's everything I prayed for. Like, God blessed me with her because, like, I think she single handedly has really helped Tyler and I's relationship. Even though it's only been two days, it's been a lot better. But I just have to shout out, Tyler, like, I feel like, you know, I mean, I don't know how I'm gonna cry again. I don't know how I could have gone through all of this without you. Like the business side of things, the personal side of things, like this man has literally been with me through it all and I just couldn't have done it. Like, I would be in a white potted room without you. Tyler, I love you.

B (8:20)

I know. I'm always here for you.

A (8:22)

I love you too.

B (8:23)

It's been hard. It's been hard for both of us, but harder for you. So I'm like. You know what I mean? I can only complain so much.

A (8:32)

Yeah. It's just a lot of stuff, guys. And it'll all be like. I think there'll be like a light at the end of the tunnel, like when everything is done and like, I figure out what this new phase, this new phase of life is gonna be for me. And when we're in the new spa, like, that'll be great. And so I think right now it's just like this limbo period that just like really fucking sucks.

B (9:01)

And because it's like the only thing.

A (9:06)

We have, our tiny spa that we're already outgrown with two new hires in it and about to be three.

B (9:12)

Oh. I feel like right now is like this month is going to be especially hard because I feel like all we have to hold are negative things. Like we don't. We have not. We're like so close.

A (9:24)

Yeah.

B (9:24)

To the positives, but we're just not quite there yet.

A (9:28)

Yeah.

B (9:29)

But one foot in front of the other. I'm. I like to think I'm a pretty optimistic person.

A (9:35)

You are. That's why you're my best Friend. I don't like negative people. You know that. Like, don't tell me. No, but you do. You are.

B (9:41)

With reason. Yeah, with reason. I'm not negative to be negative. Never. But I. I'm super excited for the future. We just need to take it day by day. I'm excited to see the team expand. I think we have some really good people that we are hiring, and it's going to not only take a lot of stress off your plate, but honestly, everyone and sba, we have been running a lean but very efficient crew for quite some time now. I mean, I don't think anyone could understand the level of commitment and hard work that each and every one of those girls give every day.

A (10:35)

Not only just Tyler, but, like, really, I couldn't have asked God to bring me a better group, like, through thick and thin, you know? And that's what I always say. I don't hire for credentials. I hire for personal. Not personality, even just character. You know who you are at your core. And these girls are the hardest workers. They're so dedicated, they are so sweet, they are so kind. They care. And I mean, like, you know, my good friends in the industry were always talk to me about all the problems they're having with, like, their team and stuff, and I'm like, I was there. Like, I remember that. And I prayed so hard to get the team I have now. And it takes time, but, you know, it's stressful with new hires because it's like, you know, I don't want one bad apple spoiling my bunch because I have the best apples right now, you know, and it just sucks. I can't clone them all. But I am excited to expand the team and I'm excited to actually be back at work. Obviously, I traveled a lot this year for work, but also pleasure. And it was because I needed to, like, get outside of my bubble and, like, gain perspective. Because if I'm home, I compartmentalize and I just focus on work and I don't take care of myself mentally. So I have to kind of step out of my day to day routine to, like, gain perspective. And obviously making a huge decision, like, getting a divorce is like, you need a lot of perspective. And the ocean is where I usually feel the most, at peace and calm. And my nervous system's calmed down and I feel like I can actually, like, hear my own thoughts again. So, yeah, I'm done traveling for fun. I'm back home. I'm ready to get back to work.

B (12:21)

We're excited to have you back mentally.

A (12:24)

It'S like I physically haven't been there, but I mentally, like, haven't. And, like, I feel. That's the other thing is I don't even want to be working on clients right now because I'm, like, I'm not even my. Like, I. Michelle, you know, like, I just. It's been really hard, and I've. I haven't really been on stories as much on social media, like, post my hands and selfies, but that's easy than talking. It's hard for me to fake how I feel and what I'm going through. I still work. I just can't show up in the way that I usually do. You'll be able to. Yeah. I think it's gonna get better. I think I just. You know, your body just knows, guys. Like, my body is expelling everything right now with these hives. Like, with the stress. Like, it's just crazy. Like, I've never gone through so much at once. And I feel like I've said that on this podcast like, a million times, but, like, this actually is the most I've ever gone through.

B (13:23)

Yeah. In the past month, we've been saying that, but, like, it's just, like, right.

A (13:26)

Now is actually the worst. This whole year has been the worst year of my life.

B (13:33)

Yours is worse.

A (13:35)

Yeah, it's just. It's been a really fucking bad year. So I'm really excited for 2026.

B (13:41)

2026 is going to be our year. I feel it.

A (13:45)

Yeah. I'm going to be in the new house and new spa.

B (13:51)

Yeah.

A (13:54)

New life.

B (13:56)

Everything's gonna be figured out.

A (13:57)

It's just.

B (13:59)

Just gotta get there, y'.

A (14:00)

All Just gotta get there, guys. So just send thoughts and prayers to us and my team as we, like, go through this next season. Because, like, clearly, like, building a spa on its own is stressful. And then also building a house at the tames the same time's hard. And then getting a divorce on top of that, it's just like, all of these things on their own are really hard. Major life changes, and it's all happening at once.

B (14:28)

Mm. What other updates do we have? Didn't you have some notes manifesting when we had that AC issue, y', all, we manifested. We asked y' all to manifest that it would get fixed. It got fixed. So these cabinets for this break room. We need your help.

A (14:47)

Yeah, help.

B (14:48)

Help manifest that it's going to be fine and dandy. What else did you have?

A (14:53)

I just wrote that Cyrus peed on me twice.

B (14:56)

Oh, yeah.

A (14:57)

So, like, when we and Grin came in. Like, I get really hot at night. So. Okay, so you guys follow me on Instagram. Obviously, Cyrus and I wear matching PJs every night, and he sleeps with me in my room. And so anyway, like, at night, like, I usually get, like, really hot because, like, the cats get all on me. And, like, it's just like, Cyrus is like a furnace. Like, toddlers hold so much heat. Like, is so hot. He, like, literally, like, my whole side where he's laying will just be, like, sweat in the morning. And so I, like, will get naked at night. You know, not, like, intentionally, but, like, I just, like, strip down. Like, I've always done this as a kid, too. Like, I always go to bed with clothes on and then, like, wake up naked. It's just a thing. And I love being naked. I, like, love sleeping naked.

B (15:35)

That's only. I've only done that, like, two times in my life. And I get so confused. Like, when I wake up without the.

A (15:41)

Underwear, did I get, like, did a ghost molest me? No.

B (15:44)

Like, where did my clothes go?

A (15:46)

Yeah. So anyways, now Cyrus, like, wants to do everything that I do. He's really in this, like, mommy, mommy, mommy stage. Like, and that's, like, just the hardest thing because I want to be home with him, but, like, I can't because I have to fund our lives, so it's not an option. Unless a rich man wants to wipe me up and make me a stay at home mom. I'll sell my business tomorrow. And I'm just kidding. I can never.

B (16:08)

It's attached at the hip, y'. All.

A (16:10)

Oh. Like, literally will not let anyone do anything. Like, he won't even let his dad, like, change his diaper. He. Which he doesn't even wear a diaper anymore, except at night, which we're getting to. He, like, won't let anyone else bathe him. Like, just, mommy, Mommy, Mommy, where's Mommy, Mommy? And it's, like, the best thing, but it's also, like, so sad. Like, especially since I think I've been taking a lot of, like, trips with him and bringing him places lately. He's, like, used to, like, being with me 247 now. And so it's hard. And, like, I don't want to go on trips without him. Like, I had. I was so sad in West Palm. I was like, I need to come home. Like, I literally changed my flight to, like, the earliest flight available so I could get home to him. Because it's just, like. It's really hard. And now I actually want to be Home, so it's great. But yeah, he. So anyway, so he's like, I want to sleep naked. I want to sleep naked. And so all through Grin came in, he slept naked every single night. And no accidents. Not one. Okay. And then, like, not last night's. Last night, I made him wear a diaper. But the two nights before, like, he peed on me. And, like, he likes to. So I don't like cuddling. I'm not a cuddler. I, again, have a lot of sexual trauma I need to work through, which I've talked about a million times, but I just don't like. But, like, with my baby, like, I love it. But, like, at night, like, I just, like, can't fall. Like, I just, like, I don't. I can't fall asleep cuddling someone. Like, I can cuddle for a little bit, but, like, I'm not gonna, like, fully sleep like that, you know? Do you sleep in Ryan's arms every night?

B (17:44)

I do. I've never fallen asleep faster, actually.

A (17:48)

That's crazy. I couldn't do that.

B (17:50)

But I'm also. You know how cold I am as a human being. So, like, it actually is so hot.

A (17:54)

I have to, like, roll. Roll him over. I'm like, you are making me sweat my mouth.

B (17:58)

No, that's how Ryan is. He's like a furnace.

A (18:01)

I'm like, yeah, I don't like that too much, but I love it for you. It's great.

B (18:05)

Yeah, it is great.

A (18:07)

So, yeah, I felt, like, this warmth on my back, and I'm like, what the is this? And then I was like, it's even warmer than, like, how warm it is. And then it was. He peed on me. And then I was like, the next night, I was like, you have to promise you're not gonna pee on mommy again tonight. And he was like, I promise. And then. I mean, he can't control it. He's a toddler. He peed on me. So now we're back to wearing diapers at night.

B (18:27)

So you're like, I tried to give you a chance two nights.

A (18:30)

I was like, I can't. I'm, like, on top of this. I can't be getting pissed on too. I can't. I'm like, this is just another thing. I'm like, no.

B (18:43)

So Cyrus has, like. He's in that stage now where, like, he knows what he wants, and he will get it. Like, if he does not want to wear a diaper, it's gonna be a battle.

A (18:56)

I'm really good at getting him to do Stuff that's good. That's marketing. I'm really good at marketing. It's just all the way that you present things. That's literally what I tried to teach his dad for so many years. I'm like, it's not like. You just have to make it seem.

B (19:09)

Like the coolest thing that's ever been. Like, the diaper is the coolest thing that's been invented.

A (19:13)

No. Yeah. You have to, like, really, like. You got to put some emotion behind it, you know? You got to, like, really, like, jazz it up, spice it up. You can't just, like, I'm just imagining. And be like, put your diaper on and, like, use force and, like, be angry. Like, you gotta just like. I feel like this diaper is gonna make you dream that you can fly. And if you don't wear it, you won't be able to fly in your dreams. Maybe that makes me worse.

B (19:35)

I was imagining you buying adult diapers and wearing them to bed.

A (19:38)

I will.

B (19:39)

If I do that, I will wear to pants.

A (19:42)

I probably still have some from when I was pregnant. Like, postpartum stuff. Yeah. I will wear a diaper for that, man. I will do anything for Cyrus. Like, literally, that kid is my entire heart. Soul.

B (19:53)

You would.

A (19:56)

So, yeah, I don't have anything else to say. I am talked out. I am burnt out. I want to go to a different planet. And I can't use escapism anymore because now I, like, gotta be here.

B (20:09)

And I've been missing you.

A (20:13)

I miss myself. I miss, like. I don't know. I'm excited for this new version of me. It's just crazy. I just can't believe. It's just, like. I feel like I'm gonna wake up and, like, this was all dream. Even though, like, this has been my reality for, like, a really long time.

B (20:33)

Yeah. No, but I know what you mean, because you never thought you would do it. So it's like.

A (20:36)

It's like, I always talked about it.

B (20:37)

Yeah. But it's like.

A (20:38)

But I never thought I'd go through with it.

B (20:40)

You doing it. It's like, I'm gonna wake up because there's no way I actually did it. Yeah, I know what you mean.

A (20:48)

Well, are you proud of me?

B (20:50)

I am. You know I'm proud of you.

A (20:52)

You know, I feel like this is gonna just, like, after this, I'm gonna be, like, unfuckable with, like. I already am, but now it's gonna be like, try me. Like, I've gone through hell and back. So that's what I'M I think that's my silver lining is, like, I'm gonna be, like, so resilient.

B (21:06)

Yeah. I mean, if wilderness didn't do it, this sure as hell well.

A (21:09)

Oh, yeah. It's gonna be like, you think you can hurt me?

B (21:11)

Yeah.

A (21:12)

You don't even know. Okay, I need to go home and see Cyrus. So goodbye, guys. Happy Monday.

B (21:19)

Love you guys. And pray for Savannah a lot and me a little. Or a little just as much. Like, maybe, like, 2% less. Actually, like 10. No, like, 20% less. She needs. She needs the 100. All righty. Have a great week. Yo, It.