
It's week 3 of your May Book Lisp. As always, no book spoilers until week 4, so Jon & Sarah talk about topics inspired by this month's read: "Beach Vibes" by Susan Mallery. Jon weighs in with his psychology class training on how siblings can be so different. Would you date a child star? Don't try to cheat in a small town, and ALWAYS look behind the shower curtain. Plus, Jon & Sarah wandered into a silent book club at a wine bar, & more. Enjoy!
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Sarah Colonna
Hi, I'm Sarah Colonna.
John Ryan
And I'm John Ryan.
Sarah Colonna
And you're listening to the Book List. The Book List.
John Ryan
The Book Lisp.
Sarah Colonna
Oh, that's right. You're listening to the Book Lisp. Hello and welcome to the Book Lisp with John Ryan and Sarah Colonna. Hi, John.
John Ryan
Hey, girl.
Sarah Colonna
How are you?
John Ryan
I'm fine. How are you?
Sarah Colonna
Great. Just in our house in different room than you per usual, while we record. And. Hi, listeners. Thank you for being here. If you're new, this is week three, which means we don't do the full book discussion until week four, as you know. So you don't get spoilers. Just we kind of pull things from the book, but nothing that'll spoil anything if you haven't finished it yet. And we like to save the recap for week four and talk about it all. I'm excited for next week to talk to you about this book. Are you happy to read?
John Ryan
I think I am. I think I did Good.
Sarah Colonna
I think you did, too.
John Ryan
Thank you.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah, I liked it a lot. Our June read is A Beautiful Couple by Leslie Wolf, which I blew through in two days.
John Ryan
Did you really?
Sarah Colonna
I did. I really. I really liked it. I. I can't wait to discuss that one, too. For other reasons, but I did really like it. I then realized I have a little bit of time to read whatever I want to read.
John Ryan
Yeah.
Sarah Colonna
And I mean, not that I don't want to read the book list reads. I do. But just, you know, just maybe something that I'm not looking at for the book list, but maybe I am. I don't really know. And I started a book a couple days ago, and it might be the first book I don't finish.
John Ryan
Really?
Sarah Colonna
Yeah.
John Ryan
Well, what is it? And I'll tell you, the book that I'm not finishing right now.
Sarah Colonna
It is called, hold on, the Stranger in Her House. Yeah, the Stranger in Her House. And I. It's. I think it's like I need. Usually I just finish a book because I need to know what happened. I don't. You know, how I am. I like spoilers. I might honestly just look up the synopsis. I might just look it up on Goodreads, someone that spoils it, and just be satisfied with that because it's. And if any of you guys have read this, let me know. I'm curious your thoughts. I. I was like, I thought. I thought, God, I must be getting close to the end. Somehow I was going through this and I was only 27% in.
John Ryan
Oh, boy.
Sarah Colonna
And it's. I Don't think I'm giving anything away to say what it's about, because it tells you what it's about. So it's basically a woman who has dementia. Her daughter's caring for her, and then a guy comes along to, like, help out around the house and basically slowly tries to take over and squeezes the daughter out. It just. It just. It's so frustrating. It's the most frustrating book I think I've read in a long time. As far as just. Everybody's just letting this guy just run around with this dementia patient. Like it's no big deal. It's fucking crazy. And nobody's doing it. I'm like. And I'm like, I should be. As far as he's gotten into her life, I should be 75% in. But it's 20 something, because. No, everyone's just like, whatever. Paul seems like a good guy. I'm like, he's half. He's like 30 and leaves. It's. It's. I can't. It's making me mad.
John Ryan
All right, well, I'm not going to. That won't be on the book list.
Sarah Colonna
No, it won't be on the book list. But I do feel like I need to figure out where it's. How it ends, because I need to know. There's gotta be something else big that's going to come up for it, to have all this.
John Ryan
This one I'm reading right now, I don't even care how it ends. I just quit reading it. Which was the one I keep. I've been reading it for, like a year. I keep on picking it up, like, in between books and reading it. And this last weekend, we were at a dinner party and we were talking about reading, and our friend sue talked about this book, and she goes, fuck that book. Fuck that, screw that. Like, she went off. I'm like, oh, really? It's awful. Terrible.
Sarah Colonna
A little life, right?
John Ryan
But it was. I mean, it was really. It was on the New York Times bestselling list for, like, off and on for years. And your friend Jackie gave it to you?
Sarah Colonna
She gave it to me and she said it's an amazing book and I still haven't read it.
John Ryan
And you think she just gave it to you? Because it's like. It's like a brick. It's like 5 million pages. She was trying to, like, empty out her. Her car, her house, whatever it was.
Sarah Colonna
She was. She was driving east for. For quite a while and getting rid of a bunch of stuff. And I think she just brought it to me instead of donating it to Goodwill or.
John Ryan
So I was reading it on Kindle, and I swear to God, I've been reading for hours and hours. I looked down. I'm like 25% into the book. Like the thing. It must be 4,000 pages.
Sarah Colonna
It's very. I know. It is long. I don't know. I wonder how many pages it is.
John Ryan
Well, so far, just depressing.
Sarah Colonna
So is that. Why did. Is that what sue said, too?
John Ryan
Yeah, yeah. Sue basically gave me permission to put it down, put it out of its misery.
Sarah Colonna
It's 814 pages. That's a long time.
John Ryan
Is it really, though? Not all books were that long. It feels very long.
Sarah Colonna
No, most.
John Ryan
Very long.
Sarah Colonna
Most that we read are probably like 300 and something, I would guess.
John Ryan
Oh, really?
Sarah Colonna
Yeah. Not.
John Ryan
I mean, it's hard to tell on a Kindle because you have it, like. You can change the font. Just have the font on here. When you read a page on the Kindle, it's not like reading a page on a book necessarily, because you. You can change the font to a comfortable level. So I have my font probably like eight or nine. So really, it's probably like four or five pages, actually one page. So you never. I never really know.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah. I feel like a lot of our listeners have probably read that book and are going to chime in on their thoughts. You can always chime in on Instagram at. Are you my. Sorry, I almost plugged the wrong podcast guys at the book list.
John Ryan
You're plugging it right beside your head and you plug it on the screen. On your screen, it says Sarah and Mary right on your screen.
Sarah Colonna
Oh, on. On our Riverside.
John Ryan
Mine. And Sarah and Mary on yours.
Sarah Colonna
Well, it won't say it when people see it. And if you guys are watching this, you can watch it on Patreon. You can see our faces. Or you can still just hook up the audio feed and join for what a lot of people join for on Patreon, which is the bonus content. We have so much fun there. We do on the 5th, the 15th and the 25th. You always get exclusive Patreon content. The 5th and the 25th are always just random. John and I shooting the. Shooting the breeze. And then. And lots of fun stuff. Sometimes like this, sometimes stuff we're reading. And then on the 15th we do a short story. And we did such a fun short story this month. It came out on the 15th on Patreon. It was called the Answer is no by Frederick Bachman. And now I want to read stuff by him. Even though I think he's not my typical genre, you know, murdery. So join us on Patreon if you can. Like I said, $5 a month and it's a lot of fun stuff. And then we're looking at adding some more content even and not increasing the price. So join us there. Just like things we can do, like we did the alternate ending to then she was gone. Things we can just throw up really quick by ourselves just to sort of add to the feed and have fun and join the book listeners on Facebook. So yeah, you're a Beautiful Couple by Leslie Wolf is your June book. Next week we will be discussing in in full detail Beach Vibes by Susan Mallerie, this month's read. John, were you surprised that nobody at the silent book club that we accidentally walked into in our very own neighborhood in our very favorite wine bar that you guys have heard us talk about a million times? Nobody was reading Beach Vibes when we walked in.
John Ryan
I, I was trying to check out everyone's book when we walked into a packed wine bar, completely packed wine bar that was very loud and social. And all of a sudden someone came in the microphone and it just went silent and everyone started reading the book.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah, it was. You guys heard John talk about this not long ago. He talked about a silent book club and meeting up and everyone just reading their books and not talking to each other. And then it happens at our wine bar. I mean we go there all the time and now they send out emails. So we talked about this a little bit on Patreon when we did the short story. But we want to talk about a little more in depth because we walked. I got an email that it was the book club, but I've never really paid attention to what goes on there because I mean, we have a book club. I don't need to go. I've taken a Kindle to the wine bar and sat there and read. I've never really thought about doing it with like minded people, whatever. But yeah, apparently you pay 25 bucks so then you get a spot. So every. It was sold out. It's not a very big place.
John Ryan
It was sold out except for two seats. Those are the two seats we were sitting in.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah, we had to sit. We. They said you can sit outside, there's two stairs, there's two seats aren't taken. So we sat there and then we felt we were like, I can't believe we actually have a book club podcast and we don't have books with us and everyone else is reading and the. This Caught these girls next to us. Wait. They were like. They looked like they were swapping books. So it looks like not everyone's reading the same thing. Because I thought maybe they would.
John Ryan
No, I don't. I don't think anyone. I think it's just, like, you bring your own book and you just read and then I don't know what. After we left, I don't know what went down, they. They stop and discuss their book or what.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah, that part. I don't know. I don't know if something happens after or if it's just a chance to be like. Not to sit at a bar and read and not feel weird about it, which I don't think you should. Anyway.
John Ryan
I never feel weird going to the bar by myself. No.
Sarah Colonna
And also reading.
John Ryan
Oh, also. If you ever see me at the bar by myself, I'm there because I want to be alone. Okay. We're at one of your shows, and a woman like, there's a bar next door. And I was like, you were going to the second show, so I'll just stay here. You're like, yeah, absolutely. So I'm sitting there just having a great time, watching my football or basketball, whatever's on tv, drinking my beer. This woman comes, she's like, oh, you want to come sit with us? I always feel bad for the kid alone in the lunchroom. Fuck you. I want nothing to do with you at all. Like, my version of hell is going to sit at the table with you and your weirdo friends. Like, that's my hell. This is my heaven right here on this bar stool. No one talking to me, drinking my beer. Yeah, that over there is hell.
Sarah Colonna
Hell.
John Ryan
So. So I replied, no, no, thank you. I'm having a good time over here. Well, thanks.
Sarah Colonna
I was going to say, how did you actually respond? Because I know you didn't. She was just trying to be nice. But. Yeah, you don't know. But you don't, like, don't assume. And then it also makes people feel weird about being by themselves. And as John and I talk about. But we both travel so much for work and sometimes and often by ourselves. Not even. Not together. So I go to lunch. I'll bring a book with me. Not that I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna finish the one that I'm reading right now at a bar.
John Ryan
No.
Sarah Colonna
But now, do we join the book club in our own neighborhood?
John Ryan
I guess. I mean. So tell me, you said it was $25.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah, I can read it to you right now.
John Ryan
I'm going to Yeah, I want to hear what comes with that $25.
Sarah Colonna
Well, I believe there was. Well, I believe there was a drink involved. And, you know, their glasses of wine are like 14 to $20. Yeah, yeah. It says book club is back with bookish. Seating is limited, so get your tickets here.
John Ryan
Is it every week? Every Monday.
Sarah Colonna
It says this just says Monday, May 12th. It doesn't say, say so it says bookish silent reading club. Come with a book, order a drink, sink into a story afterwards, socialize with other like minded lit lovers. Tickets include your cozy seat, a choice of a glass of wine, a cocktail, or a mocktail from our themed menu. So, I mean, you have a reserve spot and a drink that basically would almost cost you $25 anyway.
John Ryan
Sure.
Sarah Colonna
I mean, sometimes you can.
John Ryan
Okay, but here's the thing. We would go, we would read, and then.
Sarah Colonna
We love this place, by the way, so.
John Ryan
Oh, it's amazing. Like, if it ever goes out of business, we have to buy it. We're not letting it go. But you and I would read our book and then they'd be like, oh, everyone discuss your book. And then we just talk to each other.
Sarah Colonna
Right. Well, I don't know that they're saying discuss your book or just you, you know, talk to people after. Try to meet people. John made a good point that there was. It was almost all female, Right?
John Ryan
There's one. I saw one guy there.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah, he saw one guy and he was like, that guy's no knows what he's doing.
John Ryan
Yeah, yeah. He understood the situation very well.
Sarah Colonna
It's like when John. John used to. When he lived in Seattle. Some of you have heard the story, most of you probably have not, but he used to go to wine tasting, Whole Foods. To go to wine tasting classes. Because he's trying to pick up.
John Ryan
It was only $10 a week.
Sarah Colonna
$10 a week. And did you pick up.
John Ryan
No, but I picked up a nice glass of Burgundy. How dare you.
Sarah Colonna
You know that that's why you were going.
John Ryan
No, it wasn't.
Sarah Colonna
You weren't going to Whole Foods wine tasting classes to. To learn about wine.
John Ryan
Sarah, I was playing in the NFL. I was in my mid-20s. I didn't have to go to a wine shop to pick up a woman.
Sarah Colonna
All right, so you actually told me that once before already, too. Never mind.
John Ryan
I'm kidding.
Sarah Colonna
I know, I know you didn't. Whatever.
John Ryan
I did not pick up any girls at the wine tasting.
Sarah Colonna
Just at the parking lot after. No. So. Okay. Anyway, it looked like a lot of fun. We need to do something like that we need to do once, you know, when we grow. Yeah. Do some kind of book list meetup. And I guess I don't. But it's not going to be silent because everyone's going to want to talk to each other about the books we've already read together.
John Ryan
Right. So maybe it'll just be like we just meet up and have wine and just talk about the books we've already read.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah. I mean, basically you and I have a silent book club every night in bed.
John Ryan
I don't know.
Sarah Colonna
Right. I mean, we sit there, we. We both get our books that we read.
John Ryan
Well, I usually.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah, well, I guess you're more watching your iPad.
John Ryan
When you get my iPad. Right before I go to bed, I need some screen time.
Sarah Colonna
I was trying to stay up later last night just to get through. Just to like get at least a little bit satisfied with what was happening in this book. That when I told you about the. This stranger in her house, I was just. And then I was like, I'm not going to be satisfied. This is. Everyone's an idiot in this.
John Ryan
Here's also what happened. It's called the stranger in the house.
Sarah Colonna
A stranger in her house.
John Ryan
Well, that's what I was scared of last night. So it would have been a bad book. It felt like there are five weird things happen all in a row until we're woken up at 2am there's three helicopters right over top of our house flashing the light.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah.
John Ryan
For two hours.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah.
John Ryan
Two hours. These, these helicopters circled our house.
Sarah Colonna
Well, but you have to. We also live. It's not too. We're not too far from a freeway. So a lot of times that's because there's something. An accident or something on the freeway. But it doesn't happen often. But it was. It was long last night. Anyway, back to help Happy beach vibes. So with beach vibes, there's. Yeah. I mean we're not going to. We talk about it next week, but there was something. We like to pull topics, as you know from the book kind of and talk about. And we've had some fun discussing ridiculous proposals because what happened in this book, we've had some fun discussing living with family members and whatnot. But one thing I was thinking about that we haven't discussed yet is just how people in the same family, siblings, they come from the same parents and can be so different.
John Ryan
Yeah.
Sarah Colonna
And I know that's not groundbreaking to think about because we all know it, but in this book you think about Beth and Rick, right? Yeah. And in. Well, you Think they're more alike than they are. And then you find out they're really not alike at all. Spoiler alert. But I'm not going to say in what ways, in case you haven't finished yet, but I know most of you have. Um, but it is weird. Like, think about your, you come from your. Now they had a little bit of a different situation due to the foster family. Right. So they are growing up in the foster system and being separated and things like that. I understand that that's a whole different way to grow up and very difficult and can certainly alter the way you look at the world, treat people, things like that. But just coming from the same parents, having, having in general, just the way people can be so different. Like, I mean, if you think of me and my sister and people think we look a lot alike, I, I, I, Sometimes I won't see it, but then I'm like, okay, I do see it. I, but especially as we've gotten older, I guess. But personality wise, and just the way we live our life wise, we, we couldn't be more different, right?
John Ryan
Different. Yeah.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah.
John Ryan
And I wonder if, like, I think it's like, it's really more weird to me when you see like, like two brothers that are like two years apart when they're kids and they're totally different. I think sometimes, like, you kind of grow differently once you grow, like, outside of, like, underneath your parents, you know what I mean? Like after 18, 20, move out of the home, they might have different, obviously different wives or spouses or whatever, and you kind of like change into a different person. Maybe a little bit.
Sarah Colonna
Yes.
John Ryan
Whereas I think it's really, I think a big part of it has to do. And I took psychology. Birth order.
Sarah Colonna
Okay.
John Ryan
Like, usually you can go down the birth order and like, depending on where you're born, on a certain, you know, if you're the first of four or the first of three or second of three, it usually follows kind of like a certain kind of attitude, certain kind of personality.
Sarah Colonna
Okay, so do I follow your psychology? Birth order number two?
John Ryan
I think you, I think you would. Yeah, A two of two. I think you would. But it's interesting because I can think of, like, my family and my sisters have always had, like, a lot. They're two years apart. Exactly. They've already had a lot in common, and now as they get older, they're almost like more alike.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah, they're best friends. I mean, his family's all close, but his, but his sisters are truly, like, they would choose to hang out with each other, go on vacation with each.
John Ryan
Other, live across the street from each other.
Sarah Colonna
They're really good friends. Yeah. Which is really awesome.
John Ryan
Yeah, it is great. But I guess even with them, they have some like. They both have very different beliefs, I guess, in certain things. But like, my brother and I growing up, we were like, a lot alike in terms of we both played sports all the time, whatever. And I guess we still are kind of quite a bit alike. We look at a lot of stuff. It's like we have different attitudes towards stuff. Yeah, I'm like, I'm really clean. I'm a really clean person. Really tidy. My brother is not. I think, like, a hundred things that, like, we're different on, but we're also alike. So I don't know if I'm really answering this question correctly or not, but I'm just spitballing here.
Sarah Colonna
Well, you're the one that said I took psychology, so you better start fucking backing it up, buddy.
John Ryan
Psychology is all about answers. Okay, how about questions?
Sarah Colonna
Oh, no answers.
John Ryan
No answers. No.
Sarah Colonna
What's the use of psychology then? No.
John Ryan
Well, I think the whole use of psychologists just to get legally do cocaine and weed. Oh, a lot of. A lot of drugs in the psychology community back then.
Sarah Colonna
Oh, really?
John Ryan
Yeah. I thought I could openly think better with under the influence of drugs.
Sarah Colonna
Oh, I didn't know that. Learn. See, this is an educational podcast, too.
John Ryan
Don't go quoting me on any of this.
Sarah Colonna
But, yeah, well, I don't think anyone's really taking it as an educational podcast. Don't worry.
John Ryan
I hope not.
Sarah Colonna
Well, but that. So, no, that's a good point. So when you're growing up. But see, yeah, you're you. There might be more similarities when you're in the same household and then your views change as you're exposed to the world and doing your own thing, or as you. Or just even as you get into your teens and start developing, like, your own opinions and stuff. But I think my sister and I were pretty different from. From the jump. Yeah, not from the jump, but. But just. Yeah, she was just more, um. I don't know. I mean, she was always the one getting in trouble, and I was just better at hiding it. So maybe that's what that was. But. Because I learned from her mistakes a little bit.
John Ryan
Right.
Sarah Colonna
But yeah, I don't know, I just feel like you talk about. So you, Steve, your brother and two sisters. So in your psychology birth order, you're. Wait, what are you third?
John Ryan
Three out of four.
Sarah Colonna
Three out of four. And so what does the Psychology say about that for you? Do you remember?
John Ryan
Not totally, but I remember, like, like, Jill is kind of like the bossy one that has, like, be in control all the time. And that's definitely like a second out of four born thing. Steve was like the four out of four, so he was a little bit more wild. He was raised. He was a little feral. You know, it's like. But I think it's like. But he was. He was, like, a little more spoiled because he was like the last one and then I think the third one, I had, like, more. I always felt like I had more pressure on me to, like, perform and to do well. I think, like, when I. When I studied this, it's like, this was 25 years ago, but we kind of. Our family kind of fell in the order of what the. The order was supposed to be.
Sarah Colonna
Oh, see, I just learned something about you because that thing where you just said there's more, like, pressure on you to do well because you're three out of four. This is why you get very upset if you think you've done anything remotely wrong.
John Ryan
Yeah, I do. I like to do everything correctly.
Sarah Colonna
I know, but you guys, you know, you guys have never seen anything like it. And this isn't. I'm not. I. No, I'm not giving you a hard time. It's actually. It. It bums me out. But it's also very sweet. But it's also just. I know. I'm not kidding you. If. If. If John breaks. If he breaks a glass in this house, he looks like he just. I just killed a puppy. I mean, he looks like he just on accident, obviously. He just looks, like, devastated. And I know it's not because you grew up with parents that. That were hard on you. I know. It's not that. I know it's not because you couldn't break a glass in the house without getting screamed at. So I've never. I'm always like, what is that whole. And that's what it is. It's that you just are just this. You don't want to do anything remotely wrong.
John Ryan
I had a coach in the NFL for eight years. Luckily, I had him for eight years. After about the. Halfway through the first year, he just basically stopped saying anything to me after I did anything wrong. He was just like, I cannot be as hard on you as you are on yourself. I was like, he just stopped. He never once after that been like, what are you doing? Or nothing. Not one time in the next seven and a half years.
Sarah Colonna
Because he's just like, he can't take it.
John Ryan
He was basically trying to console me after I fucked up, not yell at me.
Sarah Colonna
I guess it's a good quality in some ways. I mean, I don't like to mess up either. And I get. I'll get mad at myself if I mess something up, but I just. I mean, you. Or if, you know, something small or if. And. And then. And I've had to learn my lesson the kind of. The hard way that if I feel like something isn't done or something and I bring it up, then I will watch in real time that he will beat himself up for two straight weeks. And then I realized that that wasn't worth it. He didn't need to do that. So you learn, you guys, you learn.
John Ryan
Yeah. Yeah.
Sarah Colonna
But then. But then you think about some siblings. Think what it's like to be a sibling when you're, you know, think what it's like to be one of your other. I mean, I don't know. I feel like Erica probably is pretty much is very similar that way. Right?
John Ryan
She's like a perfectionist.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah, that's one of his sister and then his older sister Jill. I feel like she's a perfectionist too. But just don't. Doesn't it make you jealous of the people that just freeball it? Yeah, the people that just, oops, dropped a glass, whatever.
John Ryan
Yeah.
Sarah Colonna
Guess I'll. Guess I'll clean it up at some point. Whatever. Just running around with their dick out, not worrying about a thing.
John Ryan
Very jealous of that, actually. When I. When I first made the NFL, there was guys like that. And I was like, oh, my God. Like, I'm never gonna make it unless I'm, like, stupid. Like, they are. Like, how does this roll off their backs? Like, I go home and I think about it until tomorrow, for the next 18 hours, and then I come back and try to fix it. And there's like, ah. What? I dropped that pass yesterday. Like, I didn't stop thinking about you dropping that pass. You don't even care.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah, there's gotta be a fine. There's gotta be a line. But somewhere between the two, I feel like would be a more comfortable place to lie for all of us.
John Ryan
40, 43 years old. I don't think I'm gonna find it now.
Sarah Colonna
No, I'd like to. Yeah. And I think. I mean, we're not parents, so it's. It's hard because I think a lot of times people think, whoa, it's the way you were raised, this and that. But when I say in, like, in my family, my. My sister and I were raised the same way.
John Ryan
Right.
Sarah Colonna
And overall, we have the same values and same outlook on. On most. I don't. Not outlook, but same values, same. Right. Principles. I think we're very aligned, but the way we. I don't know, the way we act. She's much more sort of outspoken. And even though I'm a comedian, I have a podcast, I'm much more, like, reserved when it comes to being the. Being the person. The loud person in the room or this and that. And this isn't a criticism of either of us. It's just an observation.
John Ryan
Was it. Were you guys always like that, or do you think it made. It was even different. Just like a product of her staying in Arkansas and you moving to Los Angeles. Like, it's. It's a different. Like you've been here for almost 30 years now. It's like. It's a different lifestyle. Like, you. You would. You would have a lot different friends in la as opposed to Arkansas or different. Just a different lifestyle. Do you think that plays into it at all?
Sarah Colonna
It might play into it some, but I kind of was always that way. Even though I was the one in theater and this and that. It was right. Like out with friends and whatnot. I wasn't the jump on the stage, do the karaoke, make the scene, make the light, like, all that stuff. And she was more outgoing and that way. I remember we went on a cruise with my dad, and we were on it. We were on international waters.
John Ryan
Oh, boy.
Sarah Colonna
So we were allowed to drink. And I think you can when you're like, 18 or whatever it was. So I was 18 and she was 21, something like that. And I might have been 17, but anyway, I don't remember. But we were. It was the Mexican Riviera, and we. So she and I were like, first of all, my dad said we could use the. His bar bill.
John Ryan
Oh, boy.
Sarah Colonna
Boy, did that scare him when he got it and at the end of the cruise. But not. It wasn't, like, terrifying, but he just. I don't think he expected that we would.
John Ryan
No, but he didn't expect it. But wasn't he. Wasn't he kind of proud after.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah, at first he was like, are you. He was fucking with us. He was like, did you two seriously run up this kind of barbell? And we were like, well, you guys will go to bed. And then she and I, you know, we were 18 and 21, and there was a bar that stayed open late, and you get a little sticker that said night owl if you stayed out past 11.
John Ryan
Oh, that's such a cruise ship type of thing.
Sarah Colonna
Oh yeah, we wanted those nine hour stickles stickers real bad. And then, yeah, my dad, I remember he got. At the end of the thing, they gave him this thing to sign and his eyes got so wide. He was really good at this. He would. And he. And he looked at the two of us and I mean, my whole B hole just like clenched. And I, I thought, oh my God, we're in so much trouble. And Jennifer was just kind of staring ahead because she knew how to do a stare down with my dad. And then a couple minutes later, just smile. A smile just cracked on his face and he was like, that's my girl. So. Okay, not in trouble. So we're not in trouble. But I just remember. Yeah, she would like, we went to. God. There was a, was a. One of those just lame touristy bars in Mexico just to see north frogs or something like that.
John Ryan
Yeah.
Sarah Colonna
And there was, I mean, just. Just drunk tourists singing karaoke. And you know, a lot like, not every, like, not karaoke. Everyone was just up singing along with what was ever playing. Right. So not even karaoke, just. Just people singing on top of counters in a bar. And my sister was just up there singing with them. And I just remember thinking, what the is going on? And I was, I would have been embarrassed to do that. Do you know what I mean? And she wasn't. And I'm not saying that she should have been. I'm just saying that's how we were different.
John Ryan
But you have no, like, you or I would never jump up and sing karaoke in front of 200 people at a bar. But you don't think twice about getting on a microphone in front of 1200 people just by yourself.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah.
John Ryan
In terms of like performing. Yeah.
Sarah Colonna
That's because I'm good at it.
John Ryan
Yeah.
Sarah Colonna
And maybe if I had a really nice voice, I would get. I would. And my sister actually has a really good voice. So maybe if I had a nice voice, I would get pleasure out of karaoke the way other people do. I don't know. Told you.
John Ryan
Have you ever. Have you ever heard of the documentary called Three Perfect Strangers?
Sarah Colonna
No.
John Ryan
It's basically like three triplets brothers. They were basically separated. I don't know if it birthed like a very young age, almost like as a science experiment.
Sarah Colonna
Okay.
John Ryan
And they end up finding each other later on in life. I don't know if they're like in their late teens or early twenties, something like that. And they were all just like the same person.
Sarah Colonna
Oh, really?
John Ryan
Like three different upbringings. They all just came together and, like. And then their fame just, like, changed them. They started doing all these drugs and I think one of them killed themselves. They got sad after that. Like, the fame. The fame just killed them after that. That. Oh, it's a really good documentary, though. Came out about in 2008, maybe.
Sarah Colonna
But someone separated them on purpose to see.
John Ryan
Yeah, it was like a experiment, basically. Like, I think they might have been in the foster system. They just, like, separated them.
Sarah Colonna
I mean, that would mess you up in the first place if someone just thought it was funny to separate you as an experiment.
John Ryan
Yeah, it's. It's weird. Yeah, they. Yeah, they became, like, global sensations and they became famous, and then that did them all wrong.
Sarah Colonna
Oh, well, speaking of that, let's talk about something else in the book then. Now that we've bummed everyone out.
John Ryan
It's a good show. It's a. It's a. A cautionary tale.
Sarah Colonna
Cautionary tal.
John Ryan
Siblings, if you haven't already.
Sarah Colonna
And don't purposely separate siblings for a silent. A science experiment later in life.
John Ryan
No, don't do that either.
Sarah Colonna
So that was. I was thinking about that in the book that you brought up fame, the fact that. What's his name?
John Ryan
Dex and Teddy.
Sarah Colonna
Teddy, yeah. Because Dex is a previous child star, but still he is a. He's an actor in the book. Now. Susan Mallory said it in Malibu. I think she decided she needs to have a little celebrity aspect to. It would be fun. And so Dex, the friend, is. Is a current movie star. So when Beth goes over there for the first time and sees him, she's like, wait, that's the guy? That's.
John Ryan
Yeah.
Sarah Colonna
But then it turns out Teddy was. Am I spoiling this for anyone?
John Ryan
No, no, no. I don't think it's that big enough. Yeah.
Sarah Colonna
And it's not a big. Big enough deal.
John Ryan
Not a big deal.
Sarah Colonna
Because I felt like it was so random. So Teddy, who is Jana's brother, we, we discover, was also a child star on this sitcom with Dex. Like, they were these two popular sitcom stars when they were younger. And then Dex went on to stay in the business. Teddy went on to start to do acupuncture and massage and got out of the business. It wasn't for him. Random sort of storyline. I'll save more thoughts on that for the book. The whole thing.
John Ryan
Right, right.
Sarah Colonna
It seemed kind of out of nowhere, right?
John Ryan
No, it did, but I have some thoughts on that.
Sarah Colonna
But, yeah, you'll save them you don't want to do them now?
John Ryan
No, I think we'll save that part. I mean, we can talk about childhood stars.
Sarah Colonna
Well, I thought. Yeah, I thought that.
John Ryan
Was that where you're going with that?
Sarah Colonna
Yeah. Just the fact that. So you said, you know, some fame did them in. Now, in this book, you have two childhood stars that both have turned out well. Right. It's.
John Ryan
It's rare. It's rare out there.
Sarah Colonna
I know it is.
John Ryan
Childhood stars. I grew up to be weirdos.
Sarah Colonna
They do not to be weirdos, some of them, but a lot.
John Ryan
I heard a childhood star tell me, Alyssa Milano told me that your. Your age is stunted at the time that you first become famous.
Sarah Colonna
Oh, did she really tell you that?
John Ryan
Yeah.
Sarah Colonna
That's interesting.
John Ryan
I was like, it kind of makes sense because it's like, it's such a. I'm not. I don't know. But learning more from people in la, it seems like such a weird life.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah.
John Ryan
Like you're all. You're instantly pushed in with a bunch of adults into an adult industry. Not. Not the adult industry, but. An adult industry.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah. Some of them take a wrong turn into the adult industry. Sure. That's funny that she said that to you because I find her to be so mature. Right. And so I like, I don't find her stunted at that age. Was she just kind of saying, like, overall?
John Ryan
I think she's pressing.
Sarah Colonna
Overall, yeah. But we. We worked on a show called Insatiable together. And so John got to know Alyssa very well. She's wonderful. We love her. And she was famous for very young, so. But yeah, maybe in general, maybe there's just this, like, weird part of you that still is. I could see that. I was thinking if I'm. I was just thinking about what it would be like to be Beth and find out that this guy used to be a child star. Now since he got out of the business, maybe it's a different thing. But then, I don't know. If a child star wanted to date you, would you do it if you weren't with me? Obviously.
John Ryan
And also, I don't know. I guess it's a case by case situation. But I just find like, the. All the stories here about childhood stars, they're. Most of them are really weird.
Sarah Colonna
I don't know that they're weird. They just seem.
John Ryan
Oh, they're weird. Girl, you're just trying to be nice.
Sarah Colonna
No, because I don't think they're weird. I think they just go through a lot. I think it's more like I Mean, there's a few, but I just think you think of, like, your. Debbie Ryan's, your people like that who became famous for Disney shows. Right. And. And. Or, you know, we. I get another person I worked with. She's amazing and great and has her head on her shoulders. But I think there's a very easy chance for you. I mean, we know the famous ones, Lindsay Lohan, Demi Lovato, people that have gone through hell because they were not nurtured correctly as children, you know, by the. By the industry and.
John Ryan
And Drew Barrymore.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah. And there's drugs flying at you. And there's. Right. And. But all. All of. All three of those people came out on top.
John Ryan
Yeah. I think there's a difference, too, between, like, okay, I'm 12 years old. I really like to act. I want to see how far I can take it. Or like, a Mary Kate, Nashley Olsen being eight months old. I mean, pushed into a role that they have absolutely no say in whatsoever. They might not have been eight months. They were like two years old. Whatever. They were pushed into a role to, like, they have. They had zero say in it.
Sarah Colonna
Okay, zero say in it. And random tangent, but remember when they were doing Fuller House and they didn't want to do it.
John Ryan
Yes.
Sarah Colonna
And people were.
John Ryan
Because they're not actors.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah. And people were giving them so much that were like, you guys should be grateful for this. Like, you know, I can't believe you're turning a show that made you. It's like, I was a. I didn't ask to do it.
John Ryan
We're worth, like a billion dollars now. I don't need to go on that show. I'm not an actor. Why would I go on that show? I'm a fashion designer.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah, but I also. But they made it. It's just like they made it clear they didn't want to be. I mean, they had a little stint. Right. They did a couple movies when they were. When they were younger for a bit. And then I think they were like, oh, this isn't. I don't like this. I don't want to be an actor.
John Ryan
Sister's name.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah. She's really talented.
John Ryan
She's really good. Like, she clearly wants to be an actor. She's an adult. But she's. She's. Was she in that Candy show or is the other one.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah, Remember Elizabeth Olsen? Elizabeth Olsen. She's so talented. And, and listen, I'm not saying Mary Kate and Ashley aren't either, but I'm saying that as far, there are talented, very smart Business women. But they also were like, nah, I don't want to do this.
John Ryan
I'm looking up her. No. You know, there's two shows that came out at the same time, and one was called Candy and the other was called.
Sarah Colonna
And the other one was what? The one.
John Ryan
Love. Death.
Sarah Colonna
Yes, Love and Death. So that show is so good with Jesse. Jesse Plummet. Yes. I love. We're big fans.
John Ryan
Well, I love them from obviously, Friday Night Lights. That's where, yeah, we first saw him. No, wasn't Jesse Plummons in Candy? Was he in the other one? No, he wasn't. That's this one Love and Death.
Sarah Colonna
That's a good choke. You guys haven't watched it, but I do think that. Yeah, I. The child sp. Star aspect of it is interesting that they throw in. We'll. We'll dive into it more next week.
John Ryan
Yes.
Sarah Colonna
Excited.
John Ryan
We have a friend that was a child actor and then got out of it, and he is very normal guy. Jeff Cohen.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah. And now he's a very, very.
John Ryan
I always bring up his name.
Sarah Colonna
Entertainment lawyer.
John Ryan
Very successful entertainment lawyer.
Sarah Colonna
He was chunk in Goonies.
John Ryan
He was. I saw the other day, there's a clip on Instagram of him doing an interview when he was like whatever the age was during that show. And he was freaking hilarious. He's so smart as it is. But he was. You tell how smart he was when he was 12 years old and he just, like, humorously just like runs this whole interview. It's incredible.
Sarah Colonna
Oh, that's funny. I have to look that up and.
John Ryan
Not surprising if you know him.
Sarah Colonna
So now the other thing I was thinking of to pull from this book for the topic is just the. So Malibu is not a big town. Right. It's a small town, if you think about it. And now when you. When you. If you've never been there or if you think about it, or if you in your brain, you're like, oh, glitz and glamour and Malibu. And of course, there's very beautiful homes and a lot of money in parts of Malibu.
John Ryan
It's not as big as People have never been there think it is.
Sarah Colonna
Right.
John Ryan
I would say when people come from other places because they want to come see Malibu, they're not. Their first question when they get to Malibu is, where's Malibu?
Sarah Colonna
Yeah, like, you're, like you're in it.
John Ryan
This is. This is it. That's all you. There's nothing else.
Sarah Colonna
There's really not there. I think there's. There's a couple of smaller, on the smaller ends, hotels. There's The Malibu, you know, beach end. And then I think, did Nobu end up making a hotel? I never even. I don't even know.
John Ryan
I'm not sure. I don't think they made. I thought they just made. No, I don't think so. Because the Soho House was beside the Nobu.
Sarah Colonna
Right. So there's like, there's not that many places to stay, really. And then if you. And. And so I think in people's minds, there's going to be like this Four Seasons on the beach. And that's not a thing. There is Westlake Village, which is really nice.
John Ryan
Yeah. But no, there's not a big hotel there even. Yeah, but even. There's really only like two. Like there's more place to eat, but there's kind of like two main restaurants there and one of them burned down.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah. Moon Shadows, which I think we mentioned because they bring it up in, in this book as well. And we mentioned that it's RIP. It was a wonderful place. But I. There, there, there's. That being said, there's like a few kind of like localish places, right, to eat, including the place that we just went recently with our friends Trish and Jace to eat for his birthday that.
John Ryan
Was in Malibu, called again, it was so good.
Sarah Colonna
Can't remember the name of it. I feel bad.
John Ryan
Incredible.
Sarah Colonna
It was. The food was amazing. But anyway, because of that, because I know it's kind of more of a small community. My one thing, because I grew up in a small community. John grew up in a small community. And I'm like, how the F did Rick? Well, it says it in this, in the. In the description for the book that he cheats with her on her friend. So I don't think that's going to be a big surprise if somebody hasn't finished it. So there's a cheating situation and we'll just. We won't get into that. But what. How do you think someone is prominent as. As the character in this book got away with not being faithful in this kind of small community, going out to restaurants in Malibu. There's like. Like you said, there's. There's only a handful of them.
John Ryan
Y. Yeah. And it's. Yeah, as you said, it's a small place. And also the girl's name is Galaxy.
Sarah Colonna
That he is seeing the other person he's seeing.
John Ryan
And I just say if your name is Todd or John or Sarah, people don't go out of their way to know what you're doing it all the time. But if your name is Galaxy, you probably Have a personality that people are like, oh, Galaxy's here. You know what I'm saying? Like, oh, guess who Dr. Rick is with Galaxy this week.
Sarah Colonna
Like, yeah, Galaxy just walked into Netflix.
John Ryan
People talk about where Galaxy is.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah, that's a, that's a really good point.
John Ryan
And you couldn't, you couldn't get away with cheating in Malibu.
Sarah Colonna
I don't think so.
John Ryan
I feel like everyone knows every. All the locals know. All the locals in Malibu.
Sarah Colonna
Yeah.
John Ryan
And they're locals.
Sarah Colonna
And, and I. So I do feel like, you know, if you're going to be in a small community trying to pull this double life stuff, guys, I mean, I. Up in Farmington, Arkansas, you didn't have chance in hell. You think I didn't find out that Bucky hooked up with Carrie Harvey right, Right away? You think I didn't find that out immediately that he hooked up with her at the basketball homecoming dance?
John Ryan
Well, in high school, Elvin was cheating on Peter Reed's sister with Trista. And my girlfriend at the time caught them at a party because she was always. Walked in to the bathroom and Trista walked out and she's always paranoid. She put back the, the, the, the. What's called. The shower curtain. And he was standing in the. In there. Yes. It was the talk of the school. And they'd been going up for like a year. They had that. They had like a one year affair in high school.
Sarah Colonna
How did you get away with that? In Saskatchewan, in Regina, the two girls.
John Ryan
Live next door to each other. It was, it was juicy.
Sarah Colonna
So almost.
John Ryan
Almost 30 years ago.
Sarah Colonna
So was he nude in the shower?
John Ryan
No, he was clothed. They were just making out.
Sarah Colonna
They were just making out. And he jumped, necking and he jumped in the shower to hide. And the girl was like.
John Ryan
And Tristan walked out and my girlfriend at the time walked in and she was always paranoid. So she went back the. Put back the shower curtain and he was in there. And the whole school exploded for the whole week.
Sarah Colonna
Wow. Did she come out like at the party and tell that his. Her friend, his girlfriend?
John Ryan
No, I think it was a slow whisper that made its way around. You know, it was back then.
Sarah Colonna
So he was in the shower, guys.
John Ryan
Yeah.
Sarah Colonna
Whoa. That is scandalous.
John Ryan
Oh, yeah. It was like a Lifetime movie.
Sarah Colonna
And the two girls lived next door to each other?
John Ryan
Yep. Best friends.
Sarah Colonna
Not for long. Did they stop being friends?
John Ryan
No, I think they did. I think they became friends again. You know, chicks before dicks, right, girls?
Sarah Colonna
I did become friends with Kerry Harvey again, I'll tell you that. I was also scared of her. So that's probably why I forgive her. Now, Carrie, Harvey, if you're listening, I forgive you for making out with Bucky. It's fine. All right, well, I think we're done here.
John Ryan
Somebody said we were done about four or five minutes ago, but go ahead, somebody.
Sarah Colonna
That was really fun and random and I liked it. But we are very excited to dissect the entire book next with you. Next week with you. So that is on the 26th of May, the full book review of Beach Vibes by Susan Mallory. Then don't forget, you got a beautiful couple coming up for your June pick by Leslie Wolf. I will announce our Patreon short story over on Patreon at some point next week. That's for June. But this month it was. The answer is no. If you're wanting to join Patreon now. The answer is no. It was a quick read. I think I read it in an hour and John listened to it in an hour, a little over an hour on Audible. And it was a really fun story. And we just did that on the 15th, so. 5th, 15th and 25th. You'll always have bonus content. Please join us on Patreon if you can. $5 a month. And if you can't rate, review and subscribe and tell a friend about us. Each. Each of you tell a friend and your friend isn't stupid, then they'll listen to the podcast and they'll tell a friend and then they'll tell a friend who's not stupid. Even if they. I should stupid. No, I'm saying if they. They are dumb if they don't listen. That's what I'm saying.
John Ryan
Oh, I got you.
Sarah Colonna
You know what I mean? Because they're missing out on the fun.
John Ryan
No, I got you loud and clear.
Sarah Colonna
Okay. All right, guys, we will see you next week. Bye.
John Ryan
Bye.
Sarah Colonna
The book list.
John Ryan
The book lisp.
Sarah Colonna
The book list.
John Ryan
The book lisp.
Sarah Colonna
The book lisp.
In this engaging episode of The Book Lisp, hosts Jon Ryan and Sarah Colonna dive into their latest book selections, share personal anecdotes, and explore various literary and psychological themes. The episode, titled "Always Check the Shower," spans nearly 48 minutes, offering listeners a blend of book discussions, personal stories, and humorous banter.
[01:10] Sarah Colonna:
"Our June read is A Beautiful Couple by Leslie Wolf, which I blew through in two days."
Sarah enthuses about her June selection, highlighting her swift progress through the book and expressing excitement for the upcoming discussion. Jon reciprocates her enthusiasm, setting the stage for a lively monthly book club session.
[02:02] Sarah Colonna:
"It's called The Stranger in Her House. I think it's like I need... [pauses]... it's the most frustrating book I think I've read in a long time."
Sarah opens up about her difficulty in completing The Stranger in Her House. She critiques the protagonist's situation, expressing frustration over how secondary characters handle a dementia patient. Her candid reflections resonate with listeners who may share similar read-aloud challenges.
[04:03] John Ryan:
"This one I'm reading right now, I don't even care how it ends. I just quit reading it."
Jon discusses his ongoing battle with A Little Life, despite its acclaim. He shares a relatable experience of attempting to persevere with a lengthy, emotionally taxing book but ultimately deciding to move on after a friend's harsh critique.
[08:14] Jon Ryan:
"I was trying to check out everyone's book when we walked into a packed wine bar... and everyone started reading the book."
Jon and Sarah recount their accidental visit to a silent book club at their favorite local wine bar. They describe the surprising silence amidst a loud setting and the unique atmosphere where attendees read their own books in a communal space.
[09:17] Sarah Colonna:
"We had to sit... they said you can sit outside, there's two stairs, there's two seats aren't taken."
The hosts discuss the dynamics of the silent book club, including its exclusivity and the solitary nature of the activity. They contemplate the benefits and limitations of such a setup, considering their own reading habits and social preferences.
[17:48] Sarah Colonna:
"Just coming from the same parents, having... we couldn't be more different."
Sarah and Jon delve into the psychology of birth order, exploring how siblings raised in the same household can develop markedly different personalities and life paths. They share personal anecdotes about their own families, highlighting how individual experiences shape one's character despite shared genetics and upbringing.
[18:16] John Ryan:
"I think it's like, it's really more weird to me when you see like two brothers... completely different."
Jon expands on the concept, referencing his studies in psychology and discussing how birth order can influence leadership tendencies, responsibility, and social behaviors among siblings.
[33:03] Sarah Colonna:
"It seems like there's a very easy chance for you... the famous ones, Lindsay Lohan, Demi Lovato..."
The conversation shifts to the lives of child stars, examining how early fame can impact personal development and future career choices. They reference Beach Vibes by Susan Mallory, where childhood stardom plays a significant role in character development.
[34:17] Sarah Colonna:
"But we worked on a show called Insatiable together. And so John got to know Alyssa very well."
Jon brings up a real-life connection to the topic, discussing Alyssa Milano and her experiences as a child star. They critically assess the pressures and challenges faced by young actors in the industry.
[40:17] Sarah Colonna:
"So Malibu is not a big town... it's a small community."
Sarah provides insight into Malibu's real-life dynamics, contrasting them with its often glamorized depiction in literature and media. They analyze how the setting influences the narrative of Beach Vibes, particularly in relation to infidelity and community surveillance.
[42:53] John Ryan:
"If your name is Galaxy, you probably have a personality that people are like, oh, Galaxy's here."
The hosts humorously discuss character names and their impact on plot development within a small community, emphasizing how unique names can lead to increased scrutiny and gossip.
Throughout the episode, Jon and Sarah pepper their discussion with personal stories, such as Jon’s experience with silent book clubs, Sarah’s childhood cruise misadventures, and their humorous take on relationships and societal expectations. These anecdotes add depth and relatability, engaging listeners with authentic and entertaining narratives.
As the episode wraps up, Jon and Sarah tease the next full book review of Beach Vibes by Susan Mallory, scheduled for May 26th. They also promote their Patreon, highlighting exclusive content like bonus episodes, short stories, and behind-the-scenes discussions. They encourage listeners to support the podcast through ratings, reviews, and word-of-mouth recommendations.
[47:20] John Ryan:
"If you can't rate, review and subscribe and tell a friend about us."
Their closing remarks are both promotional and appreciative, reinforcing the community aspect of their podcast and expressing gratitude towards their listeners.
Sarah Colonna [02:48]:
"It's so frustrating. It's the most frustrating book I think I've read in a long time."
John Ryan [04:03]:
"This one I'm reading right now, I don't even care how it ends. I just quit reading it."
Sarah Colonna [17:48]:
"We come from the same parents and can be so different."
Jon Ryan [33:27]:
"Dex and Teddy was a good show. It's a cautionary tale."
Sarah Colonna [43:10]:
"Galaxy just walked into Netflix. People talk about where Galaxy is."
"Always Check the Shower" showcases Jon Ryan and Sarah Colonna's dynamic interplay of humor, personal insight, and thoughtful analysis. Whether discussing the intricacies of sibling relationships, the challenges of child stardom, or the peculiarities of small-town Malibu, the hosts provide a rich and engaging listening experience. Their ability to intertwine personal stories with broader literary themes makes this episode both entertaining and insightful for avid readers and casual listeners alike.