← The Book Lisp with Jon Ryan & Sarah Colonna
The Book Lisp with Jon Ryan & Sarah Colonna
Do Tell Mama
00:48:33
It's Week 3 of your December Book Lisp. With no book spoilers until week 4, Jon & Sarah discuss topics inspired by this month's read, “Christmas Presents” by Lisa Unger. Jon reveals his Holiday listening stations & Sarah feels seen about “foil embossed” book covers. Plus, the stigma of Strip Clubs, trusting your gut when it comes to your friend’s new “friend,” what you should not “tell mama,” and much more. Enjoy!
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- [00:00]
A
Hi, I'm Sarah Colonna.
- [00:02]
B
And I'm John Ryan.
- [00:03]
A
And you're listening to the Book List. The Book List.
- [00:08]
B
The Book Lisp.
- [00:09]
A
Oh, that's right. You're listening to the Book Lisp. Hello and welcome to the Book Lisp with John Ryan and Sarah Colonna. Hi, John.
- [00:20]
B
Hello. How are you now?
- [00:22]
A
I'm pretty good. It's a big week. How are you?
- [00:26]
B
A big week. My God, I'm stressed right to the freaking nuts.
- [00:30]
A
He's. John is stressed to the nuts, as he just said. I would never say that, but that's what he said. And because I don't have nuts, but I, you know, earlier. So we're recording this a couple days in advance before you guys hear it, because that's how things work. But we're recording a little bit more in advance because we have a bunch of get. We have five household guests coming in this week, as well as our holiday, annual holiday party that grows every year.
- [01:02]
B
Yes.
- [01:03]
A
And that's on Friday the 12th. So you guys are. We have this.
- [01:06]
B
We have people coming from Philadelphia, New York, Seattle, Spokane, Canada, Dallas, there's Price and other cities in between there, too. But we have probably 30 people coming from out of town, five staying with us. The rest are staying at Palm Desert, staying at the hotel down the road. And we have 150 guests coming to this party. We have, I think this year we have about 15 employees working it between caterers, security guards, DJs, bartenders, servers. It's a big. It gets bigger and bigger every year and it's getting too big. And I love it.
- [01:45]
A
I was gonna say. And so it's super fun. We will tell you more about it later because we're recording this before the party. So when you hear this podcast on the 15th, we can't really give you anything. And then the next podcast is the full book review. So maybe on Patreon, whatever, we'll talk about it and we'll give you guys like. We'll talk about it. But and also because we have.
- [02:09]
B
We have. Because the people that are listening, we have so much crossover. We have. We have Jeff Lewis people on here, we have Chris Frangola people on here, we have Are you my podcast people on here? And all those people are going to be at the party. So there's going to be a ton of crossover, too. So, yes, yes, Hear them all about it.
- [02:26]
A
We're going to hear all about it. But I just wanted to point out that today we were talking to someone that we know and he said, so do you get stressed out before the party. And John goes, oh, just like, maybe like an hour before the party, I start to get stressed out. And I was like, um.
- [02:45]
B
You don't. When do I get. When do I get stress?
- [02:48]
A
Well, you just said it. You just said it yourself. So you.
- [02:52]
B
I don't.
- [02:52]
A
I don't.
- [02:53]
B
I don't think it's necessarily stress. It's just like a little bit like, of anxiety and just like a little bit like, like, almost like. It's almost like how I felt before a football game where I wasn't stressed about it, but I was just, like, apprehensive. There's some nerves. There's like a lot of stuff going on. You just want to make sure everything turns out well.
- [03:10]
A
I know, but. And that's normal because of the size of it. You said you started off this podcast saying that and now you want to backtrack because you don't want to be.
- [03:19]
B
Well, I'm a stressful. I'm a showsman. I was trying to put on a show for our fans.
- [03:24]
A
No, the show is you are stressed. Admit it.
- [03:27]
B
Too blessed to be stressed, girl. You know what's also annoying is people that always, like, say things that rhyme and they're like, yeah, that's how it is. Too stressed. Too blessed to be stressed. You know, like, stuff like that. I'm sick of that.
- [03:43]
A
You guys can hear it. His voice. He's stressed. Stress, baby.
- [03:46]
B
Too blessed to be stress.
- [03:49]
A
No. Big week. We are excited to be here. This is our the next week. I can't believe it's already the fourth Monday of December. So we'll talk about the book Incomplete. If you guys are new here, we don't give you any spoilers. First three Mondays are just topics we pull from the book. Random conversations. We're going to do that right now. And then there are five Mondays this month and the fifth Monday to fall on my birthday. So we will continue to do the fourth Monday as the full book review, as normal. And then, I don't know, we'll do some sort of. Some sort of birthday podcast on the 29th. Who cares what it is? It's going to be something. It's going to be. It'll be book related.
- [04:34]
B
Let's just celebrate your birthday.
- [04:36]
A
We're going to do something. And John, tell them. Remind them what their January read is.
- [04:42]
B
Summer island by Kristin Hannah. I'm pretty excited about this one. It's a very popular book. You said when you posted it on Facebook, a lot of people knew of it or wanted to read It. So I think it's going to be a really fun. A fun book.
- [04:55]
A
I do too. I'm excited. And the Book List Spinners, that's our Facebook group if you want to join. We're excited. The Book list on Instagram, you can follow us there. We also. So this is a Christmas Presents by Lisa Unger is the book that we're reading for December. The book will fully review next week. And then on Patreon we do a short story. And this month, because of one of the listeners on Patreon, we are doing Killer Clause. The Killer Clause, the Kill Clause, also by Lisa Unger, which is free on Audible and I think 99 cents on Kindle.
- [05:29]
B
Oh, they give to me for free on Bo with the girl.
- [05:31]
A
Oh, okay. So on Amazon. Yeah. Because it was like an Amazon read or something. So I don't know how that works. If she specifically did something for them. It's this. It's the short story. It's like 70 pages and I'm. It's really good. So that actually comes out the same day this episode does because this happens to fall on the 15th. This episode and every 15th of the month is our short story. I highly recommend this short story, I think and I think our podcast about it is super fun. You can go from here to there and listen to it right away. It's only $5 a month. It is. It was a super fun one. It was different.
- [06:10]
B
I just started, but it's about like a female.
- [06:13]
A
You finished it by the time people hear this.
- [06:15]
B
Right. But it's like a female hit. Hit woman. Hitman. Right? Is that where. Where I'm going with it? I've only listened. I've listened to the first half hour while I was blowing leaves out back. Some of man, I do man's work in the yard. I don't see too. But yeah, it was off to a good start.
- [06:36]
A
It's really good. Yeah, I really liked it. So that was a great suggestion. Thank you to our book list spinner who suggested it. Cool to have the same author this month. And yeah, not. It's not. It's. It's dark, but it's not like super bloody or, you know, it's just a little bit. It's different and it's a fun read. So if you want to join us on Patreon, we do that on the 15th of every month and the 5th and the 25th, we have random podcasts where we talk some books, some what we're reading some other nonsense. So we have a lot of fun over there. Join us and come see us. I gotta get that out of the way. I gotta remind everybody.
- [07:15]
B
Tacoma, yeah.
- [07:17]
A
This the seventh, two days from now. If you're listening to this on the 15th, I'll be in Snowmass, Colorado doing a one off show there. Just one night, one show on the 17th. And then Spokane is New Year's Eve. Two shows. You can come at 7:30, be home before we ring in the new year. You can come at 10:30, ring in the new year with me and John. He's going to be at all those shows. Tacoma Comedy Club. John will be with me too. We always do meet and greets. And that's just January 2nd and 3rd. From there I have the Wild Rose Casino and Resort. I'm doing a little run in Iowa for those. Just one on the February 6th in Jefferson. Springfield Comedy Club in Missouri, the 12th through the 14th, that's Valentine's weekend. Chicago City Winery, the 20th. St. Louis City Winery, the 21st. And then back to Wild Rose Casino and Resort. 27th and 28th in Emmetsburg and Clinton. Skyline Comedy Club in Appleton, March 26th through the 28th. Arlington Draft House, the 10th and 11th. And more shows to be added. But that's where we're starting. Hi, guys. Let's listen. That's gonna. That's how I'm gonna do it now. From now on, when we. When I start talking about the book, let's listen. What do you think?
- [08:35]
B
It sounds good to me, baby.
- [08:37]
A
You don't like it? Well, one thing I just want to mention in this book, because our. Our. Our central character, she owns a little bookstore, right? And it's her. What are you flipping pages through over there? What are you doing?
- [08:55]
B
I. I have to keep notes because of my cte. I. Whenever you want to talk about something, I have to write down a note about what I want to talk about or I forget it.
- [09:03]
A
But you're writing it on. Is it on a paper bag?
- [09:06]
B
A paper bag, yeah.
- [09:07]
A
And what is that paper bag? Why do we have a bunch of little tiny brown paper bags?
- [09:13]
B
It's from our Christmas Advent calendar. Every Monday, Wednesday and Friday, Sarah and I do our Christmas Advent calendar. So far we've had four episodes and we've had over 4 million viewers.
- [09:25]
A
There you go.
- [09:27]
B
It's not fun. It's not fun.
- [09:29]
A
Yeah, we don't get anything out of it, except we just have fun. And we like to tell people we.
- [09:32]
B
Get zero dollars out of it.
- [09:34]
A
Oh, yeah, it's just fun. And it's on my Instagram and John's. Anyway, I just. I noticed that that's what you're riding on, and I just thought, hey, we should talk about that. And then instead you got defensive, but it's okay.
- [09:46]
B
Well, no, but, baby, when we talk, I gotta write things down, because when you keep on talking, then I forget what I was gonna say. So I have to write it down or I forget it. And just, like on my phone, I have to write down everything. This is what it's like to have all these concussions, people. I got to write down everything from what I'm getting in the grocery store today to what I'm decorating today to that. I have to put out five propane tanks in 45 minutes so the guy can get them tomorrow. I got to write down everything or I forget.
- [10:14]
A
I do think. And listen, John's had a lot of concussions. This. I'm not discounting anything you just said, but also, I'm. A lot of us have to do that, too. So I just want you to know you're not alone.
- [10:26]
B
Thank you. I, I. I feel seen right now.
- [10:29]
A
Yes. So one thing. So she owns a bookstore in this. And there was one thing that I thought, this is just a quick little topic, but it made me laugh because she was talking about how, you know, she tries to set up the books that sell the most and put the hottest author in the front and this and that. And she said in her bookstore, the things that sell the most and keep the lights on, which are not necessarily her favorite books, but she knows it keeps the lights on, are the runaway bestsellers with foil embossed type and foreboding images. And I thought, oh, yeah, those are the ones that I talk about. Those are my picks. It was so funny, Just the description, because at least Unger knows, as a successful author of these kinds of books, too. But it is funny how there is always this kind of, like, all the freedom. McFadden.
- [11:25]
B
They all look the same right now.
- [11:26]
A
Yeah.
- [11:27]
B
You know that, like, in her world, she's taking a shot at a few people.
- [11:32]
A
Mm.
- [11:33]
B
You know, I'm saying she's taken. Like, there's people in her community. They're like, fudge you, because you're. I know you're taking a shot at me right now.
- [11:39]
A
But also, she probably has several of her own book covers that look like that.
- [11:43]
B
So, yeah, if you look at, like, especially the books that I read, especially, they all have the same look to them right now.
- [11:50]
A
Gay cowboys on the front. Shirtless.
- [11:52]
B
No, babe, not those ones. Those. That. That's. That that. That's in my free time, girl.
- [11:59]
A
Those are just. Those are just what Kindle recommends to him.
- [12:02]
B
We've talked about this. For. For some reason, Kendall thinks I'm a desperate housewife from the Midwest or a gay cowboy from West Hollywood. I don't know. That's what they think I am. Like, they. They've dialed me in. I'm like that. So all the advertising towards me is like, oh, Phil's the desperate man that can't break in the horse. But will. Will Gerald help him if he's like a shirtless cowboy on the COVID You should read this book. I'm like, I don't know what Phil and Gerald do in their free time. I don't know.
- [12:31]
A
Well, we know what you do in your free time.
- [12:34]
B
My God, it's.
- [12:36]
A
It just makes me laugh because some. Listen, some women, they. They want to go through their guy's phone when they. You know, they're worried about certain things. They don't know what's going on. You. I go on a vacation with John Ryan for the. For our first vacation together only a few months after we met. I look over at his Kindle, and I go, what. What's this guy reading? What's he reading? And it didn't alarm me. It actually just made me like you more.
- [13:02]
B
It's all, like, Brokeback Mountain adjacent. I don't know what. Like, the algorithm that I'm in is just, like, so, like, specific and bizarre that that's what they dialed me in on. I mean, I'm just. I'm just a straight dude living out.
- [13:17]
A
Here in LA that likes. That's. Comfortable with yourself enough.
- [13:22]
B
Very nice.
- [13:23]
A
A nice story.
- [13:25]
B
I'm with everybody. And for some reason, they think that I'm a little bit more than that.
- [13:31]
A
I know they don't recommend you any Ellen Hildebrand novels, which you do also love, by the way. So it does seem like they really are just pushing their Hallmark cowboy novels on you, but.
- [13:43]
B
Oh, my God, there's a new movie on Netflix right now, a new Christmas movie, and if it's not written by AI, I don't know what is really. It's like, Hallmark on steroids. It. It. It's like, the most like it. I've never seen a movie more obvious in my entire life. I forget what the name of it is, but it is, like, ridiculous. Like, everything's so obvious. It's. It's like. Like, more so than any Hallmark movie you've ever seen.
- [14:09]
A
Wait, did you already watch it?
- [14:11]
B
Yeah, I forgot. Where was I I was on treadmill. I watched it on the Treadmill the other day.
- [14:17]
A
You didn't think this was something maybe I'd like to watch?
- [14:20]
B
No. No one should watch this. Never.
- [14:22]
A
Oh, okay.
- [14:23]
B
I would never do this to you.
- [14:25]
A
Oh, those are usually the ones that.
- [14:27]
B
I like, but this one's, like, so far, it's like. It.
- [14:31]
A
It.
- [14:31]
B
It's written by AI for sure.
- [14:34]
A
Okay.
- [14:34]
B
I don't want to say any of it because I want to insult anyone if they're actually the author of this monstrosity.
- [14:41]
A
Okay, well, honestly, it sounds right up my alley, but I like a bad movie, but. No, but I do. Yeah. The foil embossed sort of little. What is it? You know, it's kind of like rising on the.
- [14:57]
B
On the COVID The words, like, raised a little bit.
- [15:01]
A
Yeah. Yeah, you can touch it. I don't know. We can't think of words right now, but I. Those are totally what I grab. That's what I gravitate towards. Airport read something like that. I'm in Alaska.
- [15:14]
B
You've had two New York Times bestselling books, and you have great covers of your books.
- [15:19]
A
True.
- [15:20]
B
You do a great cover.
- [15:22]
A
I do do a great cover. I mean, I didn't design them. Someone else did, but I was.
- [15:25]
B
Oh, it was your idea.
- [15:27]
A
It was my idea. Yeah, true. No foil and bus, but maybe those would have sold even more. Who knows? But that is what I gravitate towards in the airport. If I forgot my Kindle and I need to quit, I'm going to. I haven't bought a book in an airport in a while just because I do travel with my Kindle, but that's my thing. So I just liked that little nugget that she threw out there for us. For us horror story readers or psychological thriller readers, whatever you want to call it. One other thing I want to discuss before we get into a topic that I want to grill you on because you said. Oh, I have something on that. Yeah. Is when she's in the. Her car, because this does take place around Christmas time. She mentions that her radio is on the holiday chill station. Now you are on. What is the serious radio holiday. Right. That is your station.
- [16:29]
B
Well, I do. I do. I do apple music.
- [16:35]
A
Okay.
- [16:35]
B
When I'm on my phone and there's, like, essential holiday music. And there's one other one. I'm trying to look it up here, but there's essential.
- [16:43]
A
I thought you said essential. And I was like, what? That's.
- [16:46]
B
Yeah, it's an asexual holiday, you know, no asensual. You said it's essential. Christmas and holiday hits, they're the two ones and they just, just one of them is just like the classics through the years and the other one is more like modern day singers, the Kelly Clarksons, the Michael Bubles, if you will, singing holiday music.
- [17:12]
A
What was that song the other day that I liked so much and you told me it was Michael Buble and I didn't even realize it was. It's a bop.
- [17:18]
B
Michael. Michael Buble came up with a Christmas album about 10 or 15 years ago and I was, I was talking this about this the other day with Joseph the bartender at our local bar. I was like, how great is that? You come up with one Christmas album like Mariah Carey, Michael Buble and then every for like six weeks every year you get residuals because they're just going to sell the out of that for a month and a half every single year. And that's what Michael Buble did. He had a great Christmas album that came about 10 years ago.
- [17:44]
A
But what's the song that I like.
- [17:46]
B
So much I can't remember which one it was.
- [17:48]
A
Oh, cool story. Glad I brought it up.
- [17:52]
B
There's no end to that story. There's a start in the middle and no end.
- [17:56]
A
No, that's fine. Okay, so one thing I mentioned to you that as no spoilers, but however far you are into this book, even if you just started it, you know that there is a part of it takes place at a strip club where a lady encounters a gentleman and problems arise. And she talks about how when she first encounters this man and they have a conversation, he tells her she doesn't seem the type to what's she doing at the strip club? She doesn't seem the type. And she says what's the type? Exactly. And he goes down the old, you know, broken home, lost, blah, blah, blah, drugs this and that. And she talks about how men's stereotype of a stripper probably more for themselves than. Than for anything else, is that it's a broken woman who's up there being broken and he can go into the strip club and she's so broken that she feels like she has to entertain him or right. Or his fantasy is that he can save her. There's all kinds of different scenarios. But she says for the most part, listen, everyone's got a story. But she says for the most part the most women that I have encountered in my life doing this is are just women that are smart and know what to do with their assets and they're actually just Using them to their advantage, temporary or not, doesn't matter. She. Her parents think she's a waitress or something like that, and she does because she doesn't want to tell her parents. Fair enough. Whatever. Some parents would. Wouldn't care. Some would. But I wanted to discuss the stereotype of how people think that that is what it is when in. In fact, it can be just a really smart way to make a bunch of money when you need it, as long as you're fine with it. Who gives a. Yeah, you said I. You had a story about that. And that's.
- [20:04]
B
Well, it's not my story can come in a little bit because it's not directly related to that. It's just a story about misdirection a little bit. But, yeah, I think that that's kind of. I think it's a freaking sexist male thing where guys go in there and they think if they've tossed a couple dollars to these young gals working, they're doing them a favor because they're just down on their luck where. It's not like that, I don't think. Especially because I. I'm not. I'm not a strip club guy. But I know, like, in Portland especially, it's a very normal thing. And the women that work in these clubs are. Are not doing it because they're down on their luck. They're doing it because it's a great way to make money. A lot of them are putting themselves through school. A lot of them are supporting their kids. A lot of them are doing things that aren't what some people might think that are. They're doing a dirty thing.
- [20:53]
A
Yeah, right. No, of course, I. Because what I think is interesting. First I just want to say when he said he's not a strip club guy, he's actually not. So I think sometimes guys say that and then people roll their eyes. This guy just John Ryan just doesn't like him. And I don't think that. I mean, I'd rather go to one than he would. Okay. Like, I've been to strip clubs and he hasn't. I always thought. I mean, I've been to a couple of. That they're entertaining. Had nice out in la. There's a couple that are just like, kind of like bar hangouts too. I mean, it's been a long time since I've done that, years. But I just. I just want you guys to know, when John says one, John says, I'm not a strip club guy. He's not a guy saying, I'm Not a strip club guy. That is really a secret strip club guy. He's just not like his friends. Remember when he went to Vegas once with all his friends?
- [21:42]
B
This is about right after we met.
- [21:43]
A
Yeah, tell them the story. You know what I'm going with.
- [21:48]
B
We had been talking for like three weeks and I was like, I'm going to Las Vegas tomorrow with my buddies from Green Bay. And you're like, just so you know, I know you're probably gonna go to strip clubs and I'm, I'm fine with it. Just, you know.
- [22:00]
A
Yeah, just don't. I'm like, I don't care. Just don't get a hand job. Like, I don't care. I don't care if you see tits. Like, it doesn't intimidate me, but just don't. Yeah, just don't do anything gross.
- [22:11]
B
And I was like, oh, that's just like, not my thing. I'm actually, when they go there, I'm gonna sneak out and go to like musicals. I'm gonna go to Jersey Boys on the strip. You're like, you're like awesome. Like, whatever.
- [22:23]
A
He. They all went to the strip club and John went to see Jersey Boys. How many times?
- [22:30]
B
Well, I've seen Jersey Boys nine times. I don't know if it's really touring anymore, but I think I saw it in Vegas seven times.
- [22:37]
A
It's a good show. I mean, we saw it together and.
- [22:40]
B
I. Yeah, I think I saw it in Seattle one time and I saw it somewhere else.
- [22:46]
A
But so on this, sometimes on this particular trip, you probably only saw it once.
- [22:52]
B
I saw, on the, on this particular trip, I saw once. But then I also went to a Cirque du Soleil show as well. I mean, those guys put in some hours at the strip club. So I really had time to really. You know what? Here's the thing is people are always like, oh, I give into pure pro. I'm like, I'm a fucking 44 year old man. If my buddy's like, I'm going to go to strip club, like, no problem, go. I'm not. You're not going to. You're not going to peer pressure me into going. I'm going to think.
- [23:17]
A
But I also feel like you were that way at 20, I think. Yeah, right.
- [23:22]
B
I went, I went. Well, I think I went to my first strip club when I was like 18 or 19. I was, I was, I was named a first team all Canadian punter in Canada. And they, when they, they fly you up to Toronto for the national championship game. And all. All my coaches were there and they took me to a strip club when I was like 18 and they're all like 500 years old. And I was just like, this is like, so weird. It was. I just, I felt like it was. And I'm not insult. Like if that's your thing. And as we said, the women making their money, it's all great, but it just. It wasn't my thing. I did. I. I didn't like it.
- [24:00]
A
Yeah.
- [24:01]
B
Don't get me wrong, I like a titty.
- [24:03]
A
Yes, you do.
- [24:04]
B
My wife has two of them. Like both of them a lot.
- [24:10]
A
Thank you so much. I appreciate that.
- [24:13]
B
Little Sarah one little Sarah too. Both big fans of them. The twins are great.
- [24:20]
A
I. I can say that he does like titties, but I, I think because there's nothing. Yeah, I don't have any problem. I. If you wanted to go, if you're going with. This is all a trust thing for the most part. And I know some people have different beliefs and whatnot, so of course I, I take that out of it for now because for me, it's a trust thing. If you went to a strip club, I truly wouldn't give a shit. I'd be like, oh, my God, they're going to get tipped so well because John's a good tipper. He's going to probably order the most expensive, like, you know, champagne or whatever he can treat his friends. And he's not gonna touch a thing. He's not gonna. He's not gonna want a boobie touch, are you? Well, I don't know. They got back rooms.
- [25:06]
B
Oh, they got kind of like, like a buff. No, you can't eat, right.
- [25:10]
A
Well, I. No, there's like. You can do like private dances and stuff. I don't know how that. I don't know if. I don't know if you're supposed to touch or if some. I don't know. I don't know the rules.
- [25:19]
B
I'm sure there's some. Some slippery.
- [25:21]
A
I had. I told you, my friend, my old roommate was. She was a stripper and she. Was. She.
- [25:28]
B
The. She had a lunchtime shift, though.
- [25:30]
A
She did. She had the lunchtime shift. So you got to really work your way up and. Took her a minute. But then she's ended up doing great and going to Vegas every weekend and do. And making a lot of money and then bring a guy.
- [25:43]
B
Hold on. The very first time you and I, we flew from Burbank Airport in la.
- [25:48]
A
We already talked.
- [25:48]
B
Las Vegas. Never mind.
- [25:50]
A
Yeah, the. The Stripper Express, we would call it. And. And not to be degrading at all, but it just shows that there was a. Everyone called it that. And I just started calling it that because everyone told me that's what it was called. But it's the Southwest flight on Thursday that came back on Sunday. And it was just. You could just see you. You just knew what the girls were there doing. They were taking that flight, they were working their weekend shifts and they were coming back with pockets full of effing money. So good on them. No, like, no, I know. I jokingly called it that one.
- [26:22]
B
Anybody?
- [26:23]
A
No, I know. And everyone listening knows that. But I'm just clarifying. But my roommate did do it for a little while and I forgot my point. Oh. But I went. So I went to a strip club. I mentioned already that I've been to a couple with, you know, just like girlfriends, guys, like a bunch a big, big groups. Nothing. I mean, I never got a lap dance or anything. We just like, they would just go to the bar. Who's that guy? Mark? No, no, no, McGuire. He was like, known to go. And was he? He was.
- [27:00]
B
Oh, from. From the. The 1990s. Singer with a bleach blonde tip.
- [27:05]
A
Yes. Why do we.
- [27:06]
B
Mark McGrath.
- [27:07]
A
Mark McGrath, yes. McGrath.
- [27:09]
B
McGrath, yeah.
- [27:09]
A
It's so weird that you knew exactly what I was talking about.
- [27:12]
B
He. He's like legendary for. He was like a huge strip club guy in the 90s.
- [27:16]
A
Yeah. And it's like, brother.
- [27:18]
B
And he even talked about on celebrity big brother 30 years later how he was a strip club guy.
- [27:23]
A
Right. And so because there's some in L. A where it's like, it's not all. It's not full nude. So they serve alcohol, so there's bars. And this is the one thing I didn't know when I moved to Los Angeles because I had never been to or really thought about strip clubs, but they had them in Arkansas. Just never went because I was in college. Didn't think about it. But they. The full nude ones in Los Angeles, they can't serve any alcohol.
- [27:48]
B
So did they like, wear like, like pasties on their nipples?
- [27:52]
A
Yeah, yeah. So they couldn't go full nude and they had to keep bottoms on some kind of coverage or whatever. Which I actually, for me personally was like, oh, no. I was. I personally, when I was younger, I was in. Again, I don't give a what anyone does. But for me, I was just like, ew. So it's just like guys sipping water and looking like the ones that, that you could be full Nude. Those are the ones that couldn't serve alcohol. So I was like, oh. So it's just guys like sipping their like diet soda and staring at, you know, new. So you're not even having fun. You're not going to a bar. You're not. Because the ones I went to, because they weren't, because they did serve alcohol so they couldn't be full nude. So it was more like a bar atmosphere. But then of course the women were on stage, but they had to keep a certain amount of clothing on. I don't know, it just, for some reason in my brain, it creeped me out more that you would just like sip and have me on and look at like a naked vagina. I don't know.
- [28:46]
B
I heard, I heard a club owner once be like, make the women not take off the clothes. Now I can have 18 year old boys that are in high school come in here because it's not 21 plus over now. It's not 18 over.
- [28:59]
A
So. Right.
- [28:59]
B
It's like I'm making more money because I'm having these 18, 19, 20 year old guys in here that are in high school and college.
- [29:05]
A
Right. Because they can't drink anyway. Sure, it makes sense. It's just my brain couldn't take it. So. But I went to. So that aside, my friend Michelle, who, you know, one of my best friends since college, she and I went to a male. We went to a strip club in Vegas that had like an upstairs that was male strippers. And you know, mostly it was bachelorette parties. It was that kind of stuff. It was like pulling women on stage. It was, you know, guys doing a whole thing. It was a bachelorette party atmosphere kind of. But Michelle and I weren't having a bachelorette party. We were just there and we, we had a really good time. I made, I think I got her a lap dance, but the guy they were wearing, they had to wear bottoms and whatnot. So it wasn't, it was, I don't know.
- [29:58]
B
Balls in your face.
- [29:59]
A
Yeah. It wasn't thunder from down under, but it wasn't like a full strip club. I don't know, it was somewhere in between. And I just remember, I, I, you know, I don't know, I was at the atm, I was getting out money because I was like, I want her to have, have a lap dance. She had just gotten a divorce. I thought it was funny. I was like, she's getting a lap dance from this guy, he's wearing the like banana hammock thing, grinding on her. But it's on stage and it's very pg, but it's funny. And we woke up the next morning and all I could smell was strawberry lotion on both of us. I was like that. All, all you walked out of there smelling like was strawberry lotion. And I remember I said to her, if you're ever with a guy and you don't want him to be at strip clubs and you're worried about it, or you don't trust him, I don't see how they could get away with it if we, if we walked out of there smelling like this. There's no way that it doesn't work the same in a guy for a guy.
- [30:57]
B
I, I remember, babe, you were performing in Dallas one time. You know that, that club in Dallas you do? Maybe Arlington.
- [31:05]
A
Oh, the Art? No, Draft House? No, that's in Virginia. Hyenas. Okay. Anyways.
- [31:15]
B
And so we went down for breakfast one morning and we always, even if we're not drinking, like for breakfast, we still always sit at the bar. And we sat at the bar, it was like 11 o', clock, we're having breakfast, and this guy came in and he just looked like he was a good old cowboy from Dallas, cowboy hat. And he looked like he had just been through it. He ordered a Miller Light and he had sparkles all over his face. It was like, I know exactly where you were last night, buddy. Like, you, you. Someone just rubbed their titties over you with their sparkle lotion. It's like you can't hide it.
- [31:48]
A
Oh, that is really funny. Yeah. No, you can't. That's why I think, and for, for the most part, to me, that's just a conversation two people have. Whether you're married, dating, what, doesn't matter, living together, whatever. If you have a problem with the person going to the strip club, that seems like an easy boundary to me.
- [32:17]
B
Sure.
- [32:17]
A
Right. So when you told me that you don't like to go to them, I thought, great, okay. Had you been invited to one for a bachelor party or something and you wanted to go? I, I truly wouldn't care. I just wouldn't care. Because I know you well enough to know that it doesn't matter and I don't. And I think it, I think some of that comes on a. It depends on how you trust your partner. But it also depends on how you view that lifestyle, like that career, that job, that. With that person. Right. So if you find it degrading, then you're going to have a certain opinion about your partner going to something like that. If you find it to be like, yeah, go girl who gives a shit? Then you're not going to care as long as you trust your partner to know.
- [33:08]
B
But I don't find it degrading whatsoever.
- [33:10]
A
That's what I mean.
- [33:11]
B
Yeah. So it's not for me. But also bachelor party. I have been in. I think I've been in six wedding parties and I have been to one bachelor party in my life. It was my brother's and I planned it. I was like, I don't. I hate bachelor parties so much. When I proposed to you and I asked my brother to be my best man, I said the number one rule is to make sure you or no one else throws me a fucking bachelor party. It's. I do not want it. I'm like, my friends are too stupid. They're too stupid. I don't want them to do anything dumb. So I don't want to be involved with it. So do not throw me a bachelor party. And he didn't, he was a good best man. He didn't throw me a bachelor party part.
- [33:58]
A
He didn't. And that. It's funny, that reminds me that. And by the way, I didn't mean this whole thing to be about all this, but whatever. It's entertaining. When. So when. Same for me. So when John and I were getting married. When you and I were getting married. John, I.
- [34:16]
B
Almost 10 years now, baby. Yeah.
- [34:19]
A
My friends for like three, three or four of them in my pretty close friend group, they had always done an Airbnb and then they would hire the stripper guy that comes over and knocks on the door in his cop uniform. Hey, keep it down in there. And then, you know, Danny DeVito and friends. Yeah, exactly. And I, I said to them, I don't, I, I said, first thing I said, same thing you did. I said, I don't want that. He said, here's. There's two things about that. A, it's just not. I've. When I've been to yours, I found it entertaining. The guy, it, whatever. Nothing dirty has ever happened. It's literally just the guy comes over and does the dance and then. And leaves. It's not it. But let me finish.
- [35:07]
B
Guys can't be non dirty. Go ahead.
- [35:10]
A
No, that's. I don't, I mean I was at a couple of them. They were not dirty. They were just. They. No, no, I'm saying the other way.
- [35:16]
B
The other way around. Like if you were. I've seen videos of like women in male strip clubs. No, everyone's like, woo, yeah, yeah, yeah. If you went to a. A strip club with, like, women strip, it's like dead silent. Every gu is just like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what it's like. It's creep. That's what. That's what I'm trying to tell you.
- [35:35]
A
It's creepy. I just remember telling my girlfriends, I was like, I don't want that. I don't want to do what you guys did. It's no offense. I thought it was, like, fun, hilarious. Guys were good. The guy came that came was a good spot for it, like, whatever. But I don't want to do that. And I also don't think John would be comfortable with it. I just know you enough to know that you probably wouldn't want a guy coming and stripping, even if it was a novelty type thing. Like, I just know that you wouldn't like that. So I'm gonna do the same respect for you that you have, you know? So I said, I don't want that. Make sure you guys know that. So instead, they hired these guys that just served me all day, and they had to wear tuxes and they. They played little guitars. They played my favorite song, whatever. You like brothers or something? Yeah, I think so. Yeah. And they were just like males, quote, unquote, servants. But they were. They didn't. They don't touch anyone. They don't take anything off. They just follow you around and they give you drinks and then they cat. And then they sang my favorite song, whatever you like, you know, on a little tiny guitar. And it was really fun.
- [36:35]
B
I bet those guys get requests, because I saw them.
- [36:38]
A
They were. They were hilarious.
- [36:40]
B
I get. I bet you they get requests all the time when they get to the party, like. But would you mind? I guarantee you they were like, awkward requests all the time.
- [36:49]
A
I'm sure. Well, I'm sure. I'm sure they're probably like, no. Our whole website says that's not what we do. The whole point of us is an alternative to that. So there are alternatives out there. People, if you looking for them. What a weird rant. But okay.
- [37:05]
B
Yeah.
- [37:06]
A
The other thing I wanted to ask you is there was so in our story, our girl, she.
- [37:17]
B
Oh, do you want to go back to my misdirection of the original about how, like, she said, like, she's a waitress, but she's actually a stripper?
- [37:28]
A
Oh, sure.
- [37:29]
B
So my. I took my mother to Manhattan. My God, this was before you. I took her to do, like, Broadway shows and everything. We did, like a Broadway show every night. And she's like, my friend says we have to go to this bar. It's a bar. It's called don't tell Mama. And it's like, it's basically like, everyone there is like, don't tell mama I didn't make it on Broadway, and now I'm working in this bar. So I'm like, oh, that sounds fun. Like, it was like a block off Broadway. I'm like, kind of cool. So we go to this bar and we go to the restaurant side. There's no one in there. And they're like, well, why. Why don't you just come over to the. The bar side? So we're to the bar side. I'm sitting there where, you know, my mom's very cool. We're sitting there, we're drinking everything. And then we start talking to all the people around us. And it was all. It was all dudes, and they're asking, like, what are you doing here? Blah, blah, blah. And it kept on going on and on, on. And then, like, about, like, 45 minutes in, my mom and I both kind of, like, looked at each other. We realized, like, oh, like, we're. We're at a gay bar. Like, like, her friend was like this. But it's like, don't tell mama I'm gay was the whole thing. And so we're at this. We're at this gay bar and we just like. I mean, listen, I've been to a fucking hundred gay bars. Doesn't bother me at all. I'm. As I said, I'm an ally. I love. I have a ton of gay friends. But it was so funny because, like, her naive friend from fucking Regina was like, it's like, don't tell mama that I didn't make it in Broadway. When it was like, it was, no.
- [38:58]
A
Don'T tell mom I'm gay because I'm trying to live my best life.
- [39:03]
B
Because they're like, oh, girl, what are you doing here? She's like, I came here to. It was before my brother got married. Like, I'm here to buy a dress for my. My son's wedding. And I was like, not my wedding. I'm not getting married. And they're like, oh, because you're gay too. And I was like, oh.
- [39:17]
A
Oh, that's funny.
- [39:18]
B
Yeah, it was. It was really funny.
- [39:20]
A
Couldn't happen to a better mom and dad. I mean, mom, we walked out.
- [39:24]
B
We're like, your friend was way off. But that was amazing. That's just when you said that. That the misdirection type thing that what it. What reminded me of.
- [39:33]
A
Yeah, that's funny. Yeah. Couldn't happen to a better mom and son pair, though, because his mom is the coolest.
- [39:38]
B
We loved it. We absolutely loved it. We had a great time.
- [39:41]
A
Now I want to go there.
- [39:43]
B
Yeah, it was great.
- [39:45]
A
No, I just.
- [39:45]
B
And then. And then we went to Billy Elliott.
- [39:49]
A
Oh, and how was that? I never saw that.
- [39:52]
B
Yeah, amazing.
- [39:53]
A
I know. I never seen a movie.
- [39:55]
B
We went to, like, three really good musicals that week, but that was. That was before you. That was like, 15 years ago.
- [40:00]
A
What were the other musicals that you went to?
- [40:02]
B
It was with the Spider man, right when the Spider man came out. And it was, like, very controversial because they kept on having to stop it because it was like they did all these, like, crazy effects, like Spider Man's like, flying over the crowd. They kept on having, like, stop the show because they would have, like, technical difficulties. It was a. It was a really controversial thing because it was like. And they had to stop the show when we were there, too. And then we saw the. The lumb. Was it Lambo or Lombardi? And it was with. It was a. It was actually a play. Like Lombardi, like the Green Bay packers coach. And it was played. The head of. It was played by the dad from the Wonder Years.
- [40:40]
A
I'm going to Google it right now.
- [40:42]
B
And it was. It was a fantastic play. But we saw.
- [40:44]
A
Was it a musical or the.
- [40:47]
B
The. Which one? The Spider man one was a musical. Billy Musical. Lombardi Camera.
- [40:53]
A
If it's Lombardi or Lombardi is a play by.
- [40:56]
B
It was a play.
- [40:57]
A
Simonson, about legendary Green Bush Packers Vincent Party.
- [41:00]
B
It was played in the round. It was.
- [41:01]
A
It was premiered on Broadway in 2010.
- [41:04]
B
Yeah, that's about right. Yeah.
- [41:06]
A
Yeah. Well, that's when it premiered. But.
- [41:09]
B
And it was. It was from the dad for the Wonder Years was the.
- [41:12]
A
The.
- [41:13]
B
The lead role.
- [41:13]
A
Oh, he's good. I like him.
- [41:15]
B
Yeah.
- [41:16]
A
Well, speaking of restrictions in theaters, you just reminded me that when I was growing up, when Bon Jovi was real big, slippery one way.
- [41:29]
B
You're still real big.
- [41:31]
A
I know, but when he first. But when Slippery When Wet was the biggest album ever at the time, and when they were touring, he couldn't come and perform at Barnhill arena, which was our. I don't know. Is it still called Barnhill Arena? No, it's called Budwaln Arena.
- [41:50]
B
20,000 people. It's huge.
- [41:51]
A
All right. It used to be called Barnhill Arena. Give me it. Can I finish? And Bon Jovi. They wouldn't. They didn't stop in Fayetteville, Arkansas, on their tour. Because they weren't able. Because remember in the video of Living on Prayer where he flies over the crowd?
- [42:06]
B
Yeah.
- [42:07]
A
They didn't have the. They didn't have the. The stuff or whatever to let him do that. So he didn't come. And so there was, like, a good week that I was real mad at Jump On Jovi. I was like, you, dude, just don't cut. Just come and don't fly. But he was like, I gotta fly. And so he didn't come.
- [42:25]
B
Also, we got tickets to Foo Fighters. To the.
- [42:28]
A
We did get two tickets to Foo Fighters today. Okay, can I get to the one last topic?
- [42:31]
B
Yes.
- [42:34]
A
So we've touched on this on a different. In a different book, in a. In a different direction, kind of like about bad eggs that your friends were dating. Red flags, that kind of thing. But this is a little bit different. It's that. So when she starts dating the guy that they accuse of. Yeah. I just don't want to spoil anything. But for those that haven't finished it yet. But when she starts dating this guy in high school, she. It's like her first boyfriend, she has. Her friend Badger is like her best friend. And then they have the two. Two or three solid girlfriends. They're all a group. And then this guy comes to town, the bad boy comes to town, and they start dating, and all her friend. Her whole friend circle blows apart. Right? Like, they basically all grow apart. She. Her. Badger's not really happy with her anymore. The girls start growing apart. Maybe the one of the girls is kind of flirting with her boyfriend, those kind of things. Did you. Were you ever in a situation that your friend dated someone that you knew that. That actually tore your friendship circle apart in any way?
- [43:46]
B
Wow. I need to think about that a little bit because I know, like, I remember, like, in high school, because we. We were all. We were all. We had, like, a. We had a smaller class, like you. I think I graduated with 100 people, something like that. So, yeah, everyone knew everyone. And it was, like, very tight circles, you know?
- [44:04]
A
Yeah.
- [44:04]
B
You know, everyone dated each other. You know, it was like, for lack of a better word, it was kind of incestual. You know what I mean?
- [44:11]
A
Like, dating pool dries up.
- [44:13]
B
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And so it was every. I think everyone always kind of, like, recovered from it. I know I've already talked to this podcast before about Peter Reid's sister, Elvin Poga. Really ruined in that one. But I can't think of anything, like, off the top of my Mind. I know that. Like, I watch. Used to watch Vanderpump Rules. I know. Like Ariana, Ariana Maddox, she, like, had this relationship and then she's just like, yo, you're with me. Like, this has been like a 20 person friendship group. She's like, you're with me or you're with him? Done. That's it.
- [44:47]
A
Oh, because he was the one that was like cheating on her with someone else from the show though, right?
- [44:51]
B
Yeah, he's disgusting. They're all disgusting, Justine. But he was just. She was like, you're with me or you're with him. Done. Like, you have to pick your side or you're dead to me. I thought, I thought that's kind of shitty.
- [45:04]
A
Yeah. And I think in this book, which was a little different, was like, it wasn't really about picking sites. It was like this guy was bad news. They all knew it. And it just like she focused on, like, she just went so hard with it. She hadn't had a relationship before. She was kind of the one that hadn't had like a sexual awakening before or whatever. So she finds this guy and it's the first time her friends have even seen her like this. And it's the first time she's seen herself like that. And. And it just changed the dynamic of their whole group.
- [45:35]
B
Yeah. I think, like, what was I going to say now? I'm. I'm drawing a blank. But in high school, it seemed like more so because all the groups were so tight.
- [45:46]
A
Right.
- [45:46]
B
You know, is become an adult. It's a little bit more like the groups aren't as tight really. So I don't know.
- [45:54]
A
Yeah. Or you hope that people have more going on where it doesn't like.
- [45:57]
B
Right.
- [45:58]
A
Oh, it doesn't follow you if someone. You're happy for them if they're spending time with someone. I mean, they were right.
- [46:04]
B
I had a friend, I have a friend, and he broke up with his girlfriend at the time. And I was like, her, like, dude, you're way better than this. Whatever. Screw that. Like, move on. Like, you're. You're better off. And now they're married with three kids and you're like, you know, we. Have we not all been there before where you're like, screw her, man. Or screw him.
- [46:29]
A
Yeah.
- [46:30]
B
It's like, blah, blah, blah. And then all of a sudden you're like, oh, now we're getting back together. You're like, whoa, what?
- [46:35]
A
Yeah. You're like, hey, guy, good to see you.
- [46:38]
B
You really bust there.
- [46:41]
A
Yeah.
- [46:41]
B
Help you with this breakup and now you freaking.
- [46:43]
A
I told her you were a giant piece of last week, but great to see you. Merry Christmas.
- [46:49]
B
Yeah, it's kind of a natural thing to do, I think.
- [46:53]
A
No, it. Oh, it totally is to take sides. But I just think in this particular one, it was a slightly different thing where it's like this guy comes in and sort of drives. It drives this wedge that was just threw off the dynamic. And I definitely, I had that once in high school where my best friend, one of my best friends in high school was started seeing a guy who, who just has turned out not to be a good guy. I won't get into it because it's not. But you know, it's, it's, it sucks. And you try to. You want to support, but then you also, if you got a gut feeling sometimes that feeling. Right.
- [47:34]
B
You've got feelings usually. Right.
- [47:36]
A
Yeah. Not to end on a downer note, but we are boom. Happy book list. No, this is fun and random. As always, the weeks in between. Next week is our full discussion of this book. I really like this book and I will say if you are thinking about joining Patreon and you're interested in short stories, I really, really liked the short story by the same woman and it's called the Kill Claws and that is also on our Patreon. Also today the 15th, because that's when we put out the short stories. Thank you guys for listening and we will see you next week for the full review of Christmas Presents by Lisa Unger. Remind them one more time what January's book is.
- [48:21]
B
Summer island by Kristin Hannah.
- [48:24]
A
Boom. By the Book List.
- [48:28]
B
The book Lisp.
- [48:30]
A
The Book List.
- [48:31]
B
The book lisp.
- [48:32]
A
The book lisp.