← The Book Lisp with Jon Ryan & Sarah Colonna
The Book Lisp with Jon Ryan & Sarah Colonna
“Little Secret by Jennifer Hiller Full Discussion
00:50:05
It's Week 4 of your April Book Lisp, which means it’s time for Jon and Sarah to discuss this month's read, “Little Secrets” by Jennifer Hillier. Jon & Sarah give all their thoughts on this month’s twisty read. Did Marin go too far or not far enough? What was Sal’s end game? Derek was kind of a jerk. Plus, Sarah isn’t giving her Louboutins to anyone, laundromats need alcohol, and much more. Enjoy!
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- [00:00]
A
Hi, I'm Sarah Colonna.
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B
And I'm John Ryan.
- [00:03]
A
And you're listening to the Book List. The Book List.
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B
The Book Lisp.
- [00:09]
A
Oh, that's right. You're listening to the Book Lisp. Hello and welcome to the Book Lisp with John Ryan and Sarah Colonna. Hey, John.
- [00:20]
B
Hello. How are you?
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A
I'm great. How are you?
- [00:24]
B
Fine, thank you.
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A
What's going on?
- [00:27]
B
Nothing. Just out here in the kitchen.
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A
Out there in the kitchen. I'm in the office. And we're both here ready to talk. Full discussion of Little Secrets by Jennifer Hillier. I feel like I've been so excited to talk about this, and it feels now again, it feels like it's been forever since I've read it, but I was listening to more of it. The audiobook is actually pretty good. I hadn't listened to it. Did you listen to it?
- [00:56]
B
I listened to it, yes. Yeah, it was good. I was the. The woman that read it was really good.
- [01:00]
A
Yeah, she did good. And she. Because she did their voices, but she didn't. She didn't get all weird when she did it.
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B
The only part I didn't like was it's really hard for a grown adult to do, like, a child's voice.
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A
Yeah, that part's always a little tough.
- [01:13]
B
She's doing, like, Sebastian's voice. It's like. That's weird. But there's no way around it, you know? She did a good job.
- [01:19]
A
Yeah. Yeah, it was good. So that is. We're about to do the full discussion for those of you that need a reminder of the synopsis. We. Or don't know the synopsis. We got a child disappearing in Pike Place Market, very famous place in Seattle we've been to a few times ourselves. And right out from under the mom's nose at the very beginning of the book. And then shit unravels. Basically, she's just. Did the husband have something to do with it? Then the husband's having an affair. Then she and her best friend are commiserating over things. And then they used to date long ago. And then they end up sleeping together again. And then at the end of it, it all turns out he done it. Her best friend. Her best friend Sal, also known as JR So we'll get into it shortly and why and all of our thoughts on it. I really did love this book. Just remind everybody what May's book is, John.
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B
Summer Romance by Annabelle Monaghan.
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A
Yes. And you are excited. You said it's a very John Reed, correct?
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B
Very, very much a John Reed.
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A
I haven't read it yet. I'm still reading It's not her by Mary Kubica. If I'm again not positive I'm saying that right, I'm going to Google her name and listen to someone say it so that I know it's. It's possible that I'm telling you what the June pick is right now, but it's also. Don't quote me on it yet. So I don't. We're not. I'm jumping the gun here. I don't tell you until next week when we kick off May. That's when we always give our next month's pick. I want to finish it first because I want to make sure. There's a couple of things I want to make sure of before. Because, remember, I was. I was thinking this Alice Feeney one, but then it just got a little bit too twisty, which I really liked, but it just felt like, I don't know. Not a fun book club read.
- [03:23]
B
No, I read that one, too. It was. It was good. But. Yeah, it might not have been a. It was called My Husband's Wife. Right.
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A
Yeah. John was like, just tell me now if this is some weird science fiction that's gonna happen, because after the first, you don't know.
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B
You have no clue where it's going. It basically felt like the same way that a lot of those science fiction stories set up when like, Like. Like Paradise.
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A
I was going to say. I think it's just because we had just finished paradise and you were thinking they were about to do some time
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B
travel all of a sudden, like, alternate timelines and that I can't understand. I'm still trying to figure out how Back to the Future worked. Okay, so give me a chance.
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A
I still don't know either. Don't worry about it.
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B
He was dancing with his mom.
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A
See? Lost me already.
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B
Yeah, well, he was dancing with his mom, and then he didn't recognize her. When they go back to the future.
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A
Right.
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B
Well, anyways, that was not what this is about. Go ahead.
- [04:22]
A
No, this is about Jennifer Hillier's little secrets, and I'm excited to read your May book. And also we have Patreon, which is only $5 a month, and we do some really fun video podcasts. There's one on the 5th, the 15th, and the 25th of every month. So it's just bonus content just for. For joining. And we do short stories, which is always on the 15th of the month. The short stories are always under a hundred pages, usually even shorter than that. Something you can read in an hour. And it's been cool. Cause it's introduced us to some really awesome authors that I hadn't read before. Like Daniel Hearst, which I gotta find a. Gotta figure out my best. I gotta figure out a book list, regular book pick by him. And then on the 5th and the 25th we just do nonsense. So we have fun over there. If you can join us also, you know, spread the word, rate, review and subscribe to the regular pod. And there you go. And oh, I am going to be at Rooster T feathers in Sunnyvale, California June 4th and 5th. I just added those. I was like not going to do any shows for a couple of months because I just got off the road for a whole. Anyway, it doesn't matter. I decided, of course I got it. I want to go there. I haven't actually been to that club and I've heard it's awesome. So Northern California people come see me June 4th and 5th and then picks up again in August, August 3rd through the 9th at Braggart's Comedy club in Vegas. I do a whole week there. It's so fun. November or September 24th through the 26th, I'll be in Batavia, Illinois at the Comedy Vault. And then there's more to come. So just keep an eye on that. It's all on Sarah Colonna.com and that's that. Let's get into it. Little Secrets by Jennifer Hillier. So we. I feel like they were. Did you feel like they were trying to. So Derek is the husband, Marin is the wife. Their little boy Sebastian is the one that goes missing at the beginning. We've got Sal, who's her best friend is also also known as Junior Slash Junior. We find out later, Kenzie is the girl that Derek's having an affair with. And Derek overall is a prick. Right?
- [06:32]
B
Yeah.
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A
Yeah. Because it's interesting when, when, when you start to, you know, he's having an affair. So you know he's a prick. I mean their child went missing. She basically says they're living parallel lives since it happened. She blames herself because she was with him when it happens. But of course it's not her fault. It's the person that dressed up like Santa Claus and stole her kids fault. Turns out it's her best friend's fault. But anyway, because he wanted some money. So they're a well to do couple in Seattle. And for a minute I thought maybe it was going to be some weird business deal that he did that got his kid kidnapped. Did you think that?
- [07:11]
B
I didn't really know where it was freaking flying here. I didn't really know where it was going. I was trying to guess. And then I think, you know, about three quarters of the way through that you figure out that it's probably going towards that direction. But. Yeah, no, I thought it was for me.
- [07:25]
A
No, I mean, Derek, like. I thought it was like, a business deal that the dad did or something for a little while.
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B
Oh, yeah. I guess I didn't really ever think that. But, yeah, I can see it now how that makes sense. And it. It was. They talk about Marin, how they had. Because she had a. A PI Private investigator named Castro. And Derek doesn't know about Castro. And I just always think, like, how frustrating that would be, like, if this happened to you. How you just, like, you. You go through, like, every single person you ever met in your mind, trying to run through especially, like, you know, all of his business partners, anyone that was. That she's cut their hair. Anyone that's been, like, at their Christmas party. Like, she's just trying to think of everything. Which is so funny because, like, actually, it's the person that's actually closest to her was the person that did it. And she. That was never on her radar.
- [08:11]
A
Yeah, that is crazy. You're right. Because they talk about. So she hires that PI but she doesn't tell her husband because her husband's basically. I don't know, he just thinks that's not a good idea or something. And so she's also. You could see what. Their lives are so separate. She's going to group therapy for other, you know, other parents of missing kids. He doesn't go to that. One of the parents ends up way later in the book. Her child does get found. Her son gets found, but he's not. You know, he's dead. And Marin doesn't even tell her husband when she goes to the funeral and stuff. Like, these people are really leading the separate lives. So in that he starts having an affair with this Kenzie, who.
- [08:52]
B
30 years younger than him.
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A
Yeah, 30 years younger than him. And this isn't she bas. She falls in love with him, but she is. He's not her first rodeo, as they say. They. This is her and her friend Izzy basically taught themselves to be professional girlfriends. And they would find a guy with a lot of money who had a wife and. And a family and something to lose when they broke it off with them. So they would then say, sure, I'll get out of your hair for X amount of money. So, yeah, merit. So Kenzie actually knew Derek from before because she used to work at the taco truck at the Pike Place Market where the sun was stolen. Now he stopped going. Stolen, kidnapped. He doesn't recognize her at all when he goes into the coffee shop after all this time. And then she basically. She hits on him. She's seen that the kid's missing, and then there's just.
- [09:47]
B
She already knew the kid was missing because she said she was there the day that the kid went missing. She was working at the taco stand.
- [09:52]
A
Yes. And so when he pops into the store, she's basically like this guy, right? And she. But. So she never knew that he was also Sal's best friend's husband. Right. That she never knew, I don't think. Until the end, I don't think.
- [10:11]
B
Yeah, no, I think they put that
- [10:12]
A
together later on because something at the end, she was like, did you. Did you. Oh, my God. Did you also take his son? And, like, you knew. Right. So all that stuff kind of comes out. But anyway, it. I forget if we're. If we're that up a little bit. Sorry. It was very twisty, but very good. But overall, she and Julian do end up working, or Sal do, and Julian, who's another guy, he's. They do end up working together.
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B
Yes.
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A
To try to get money out of Derek for banging her. Like they do. They set up. They act like she's kidnapped. This is all. This all comes later. They act like she's kidnapped so that he'll pay the ransom and that's how they'll get the money. And then that's when she's like, wait a minute. Do you. Did you also take. Oh, that's right. Because she goes, oh, my God. Did you also take his son? Because he's like, this is the second time I'm gonna lose money. Whatever. You guys get it. So she doesn't really know the depths of Sal's depravity when she's with him. She knows he's fucked up. She doesn't know there's a kid in his wine cellar, which we find out. Sebastian, their son, is fine all the way at the end, but she. My point is, this girl has some. Some. She's savvy as far as an extent. Yeah, but then she's got some. She's clueless to a few things, but Derek.
- [11:28]
B
But sometimes I don't know if she is clueless. She was there the night that Derek killed his dad. Like she knew what he's capable of.
- [11:37]
A
No, that was. Marin was there the night that Sal.
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B
Right, Marin. That's what I'm saying Marin. Marin was there the night that. So that's. Sorry. Different conversation, I guess. Sorry. Go ahead.
- [11:47]
A
Yeah, no, that's okay. We can talk about that. I was. I was just talking about how Kenzie is this, you know, savvy sort of girl that's going to take money from rich guys and blackmail him. And she's so involved with Sal, who. She calls him junior, but she's not on to. I mean, she's on to him that he's a piece of shit, but she's not onto him with anything else doing with.
- [12:09]
B
Yeah, I think it's like. It's like she's savvy, but she's still like 23 years old or whatever.
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A
Right.
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B
It kind of seems like. Like she. She thinks she knows and she knows some things, but she doesn't know enough because of her immaturity that she doesn't. She doesn't know enough to know that she doesn't know.
- [12:23]
A
Right. And she, of course, ends up falling for him. And he's the biggest dick of them all, it seems like. Because just like things when she was in his car, and he's like, telling her not to put her, you know, get. Get anything on his seat and. And he takes her to McDonald's all the time, which I'm like, what makes her pay for it? I mean, he does give her money, and then. And then he feels guilty, but, you know, he's cheating on his wife the whole time, and she obviously knows it. So I knew at the very beginning, when Maren finds out that he's cheating and then puts this app on his phone to. That we discussed before, this shadow app, so she can see all their conversations. She figures out where this girl works. She knows what she looks like because she sends him a nude photo. She sees it all. So she goes hopping into the coffee shop to get her eyes on. On the. The woman that his wife. That is her husband's banging. And the girl doesn't recognize her at all is what. Is how it's written. Kenzie doesn't recognize her at all. And right away I thought there's no way, because she's already. You know, because we know that they're in the news and they know that, you know, the kid's missing and all this stuff. So I was like, there's no way this girl doesn't know who this. This woman is. She's, like, famous in Seattle also.
- [13:41]
B
If you're. If you're screwed a married man, you've checked out his spouse.
- [13:44]
A
That's What? I mean, because he knows you. She knows him. She knows his son is missing. She knows his last name. So it's easy to go, who. Who's what? What's his wife look like? So that was the first hint that I had that Kenzie probably was doing something a little shady because I, you know. And then they talk about it later. She's like, I knew exactly who she was when she walked in. So we were all correct on that. But I don't know why I'm babbling about Kenzie so much.
- [14:10]
B
Well, here's the funny thing is when she goes into the green bean to check out Kenzie, and she's like, oh, Jesus Christ. Like, she's all young and hot and, yeah, she has pink hair and looks like an asshole, but she has, like, all this, like, jealousy about her. In the very next chapter, when Ken is like, yeah, Marin came in. I. Of course I knew who she was. And she looked so sophisticated and put together. I'm so, like, they were jealous of each other.
- [14:34]
A
Yeah. Yeah, I like that.
- [14:36]
B
It's like. It's like a smart way to write it. But also it's like a smart way to put it, because that's how, like, people feel all the time, too.
- [14:42]
A
Yeah. I liked the way that she wrote. Basically, it would end with, you know, oh, this is her. Yeah. Or, yeah, I don't. I. Or she has no idea who she. Who I am, Whatever. And then the next chapter is like, I knew exactly who that was. So I like that kind of juxtaposition throughout the whole thing. But it's just. Derek just is a frustrating character to me because he's such a dick. So that even when he ends things with Kenzie and him and Marin go. Go to whistler and have a nice getaway and celebrate their anniversary, and they start posting online on the. On their Instagram about it. And Kenzie's fuming at home because they've broken it off. And she actually fell for him. And she's mad that she's not going to get any money out of this whole deal. And she breaks into their house while they're gone, which was insane. But even with all of that, even when they kind of start reconnecting Marin and Derek, I'm like, I don't like this guy. And then when. Later, when we find out that he's not really hiding anything about having to do anything with his son. Right. Because that's. It did. For some reason, I thought that. I don't know if any other listeners thought that, but later on when we find out that the quote unquote kidnapper Sal and julian contacted him a month after the. After their son went missing and said, you got to pay this ransom. You're not telling the cops, or your son dies. And then he's like it, I'm going to pay the ransom. I'm not telling the cops. I just want to see my son. He gets to talk to him for a second. And then when he goes to pick up his son and drop off the money, he's nowhere to be, the kids nowhere to be seen. And they. They just decided to tell him it too late. We killed your son. You messed up. And he. And this is what he has to. Ends up. End up confessing to marin all this time later because she had no idea. And he basically says, would you have. Wouldn't you have done the same thing? And she. And she's like, probably, yeah, right. But she's still, of course, hurt and pissed off. And then they saw because now they think their son is dead. But it turns out sal was just trying to be mean, and the son's fine. I mean, that sounds a real asshole.
- [16:56]
B
His reasoning for not telling her Is because prior to that, she had tried to kill herself. And he said that after this whole thing failed, if he would have told her, like, yeah, I talked to him. I tried to get him back. Almost got it back. That she would have just killed herself.
- [17:09]
A
You know what he said that I thought I. I was. It was funny. Exactly that. But it was on the audio. I was re. Listening a little bit, like I said. And when he said, if I would have. If I would have told you, it would have killed you, I would be killing you, too. I thought that was a good line. I could see. I could see the movie.
- [17:33]
B
Yeah. So sal really is. This is her supposedly best friend who's covering up like marin's been covering for him for 20 years, but him murdering his freaking dad.
- [17:44]
A
Yeah.
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B
Pushing him over.
- [17:46]
A
Yeah. He murdered him, obviously. Right. Yeah.
- [17:48]
B
So she's been covering for him for years, Protecting them. They're supposedly best friends. If you take the total count, he tried to scam her for a million dollars. $250,000 then. $250,000 again.
- [18:02]
A
Yeah. And all because he says he loves her.
- [18:05]
B
Yep.
- [18:06]
A
I mean, when she. When it finally all starts coming together that her best friend sal is working with this guy julian, who, by the way, Marin paid Julian to kill kenzie. I mean, talk about a twisty book. By the way, now that we're. Now that we're Talking about it. When I start saying all the plot lines out loud, it sounds crazy, right?
- [18:28]
B
When she. When you kind of listen to the book or read the book, you're like, when does. Marin's, like, hurt in her pain for her son, Loss of her son. When does that become like, okay, now you're just overstepping the line. And I think it's when she's like, I'm going to kill this guy or, I'm going to kill this girl.
- [18:47]
A
I'm going to have this.
- [18:48]
B
She killed when she meets with Julian at. What's that diner called Frankenstein, I think. And she says, oh, yeah, yeah, I want. I want. I want them gone. I want them dead. He's like. After, like, the whole conversation, she's like, okay, like, give me a picture of him. I'll take him out. Basically, it's like, no, no, I don't want to kill my.
- [19:05]
A
Oh, him. Yeah, right.
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B
She goes, no, no, I don't want to kill my husband. It's my. That's my husband. I want to kill his little. His little floozy.
- [19:13]
A
I want to kill an innocent girl who. Yeah. Is begging my husband. But also. Yeah, it's. It is. I think that's the one part that I feel like it had to be in there because we had to get to know this weird sort of underworld that Sal is involved in and with Julian and. And it turns out, of course, he was never going to let Julian kill Kenzie. They were just going to take the money, Right. That she gave, and he. And they were just going to be like, yeah, sure, she's dead. Whatever. They were just going to screw her out of the money, like you said. But when I get that, we had to see how he has this weird underworld and kind of starts suspecting Sal of being involved in things. But it was the only part where I was like, that's a little over the top that she decided to pay a hitman to kill her mistress and
- [20:05]
B
go and went through with it and then just backed up the last. She thought she was backing up the last second. It was never actually going to happen. They're just scamming her out of another 250k. But what, like, what was Sal's endgame to this whole thing? I mean, steal money from his best friend, steal her daughter, her son, and then eventually she's going to break up and she's going to come be like, hey, by the way, I got all that money saved up for us, and here's your son.
- [20:29]
A
That. That was. Yeah, his end game. Wasn't real clear or real thought out. I mean, he ended up taking his own life at the end, and because he knew that he was. He was pretty screwed, but. And he tells her, I loved you. I always loved you. And he basically says, look, we were. It was just going to be for the money. And then we were supposed to give Sebastian back. But then, I don't know. Your husband got cocky, and he was. And he's just such a dick that I just told him he was dead and then hung up on him, and that was that. And you're still like, wait, but all you gotta do is, I don't know, let the kid reemerge somewhere. I mean, I guess he could have described Sal at that point, and so he couldn't. But. Yeah, what's your. I mean, he was living in his wine cellar. His mom knows the kids there. The mom's taking care of him.
- [21:17]
B
They were good to the kid. They said they were very nice. They spoke very highly of. Of Marin. They said that eventually he'd be back with her. Like, I just don't like. And what was the mother's like? The mother was just in on all this stuff, too.
- [21:29]
A
Well, I think the ma. I think we're supposed to just understand that the mom was just scared of Sal. She probably somewhere in her brain knew that he killed his dad. Shoved him off a roof at a party, which Maren was immediately there for, and said to tell him, you know, to tell the police. Police. Something else happened. So we all kind of know that Sal did it in a rage. But I think the mom was scared of him. Because even at the end, towards the end, when the cops are coming, we all know that Sebastian's at that house somewhere. We're assuming he's going to be alive at that point, because even though we know that Sal said he was dead, we're like, okay, well, this is going to end with them finding him, and he's going to be okay. But the mom basically tells Kenzie, who's there, because they're pretending to kidnap her to try to get money out of Derek at that point, too. Oh, my God. For anyone that didn't read this, your heads must be spinning. I know we have a few people that are like, oh, listen, even though I didn't read it, if your heads
- [22:33]
B
are spinning, it's more twisted now that we say it out loud.
- [22:35]
A
I know, but it. But I liked all of it. It's just when you say all the different layers, it's a little insane. You just think how I Don't know how she kept it straight. I don't know how Jennifer Hillier kept it all straight. But the mom. When the cops are coming and all that, the mom tells Kenzie, get in the wine cellar. Do not open that door for my son. For Sal. No matter what he says, don't open the door. And then he asked where his gun is or his dad's gun is. She tells him. But then really she has it. So the mom, I think, was just scared of him, but also was just like, okay, it's my son. And then she thought that she was protecting Sebastian because she thought maybe his dad was abusive, because that's what south said was like, derek's abusive. I'm. I'm hiding him from. From her or whatever. But she. I mean, the mom knew. So the mom, I think, was just.
- [23:27]
B
One of the funny things that Jennifer Hillier did with the mom was that she said that she was in this senior care home in Yakima. She. They kept on saying that she has, I think, Alzheimer's. I think they were saying that she has.
- [23:40]
A
Yeah.
- [23:40]
B
And the first time the mom's there. What's that? Yeah.
- [23:43]
A
Or dementia. I forget.
- [23:44]
B
Okay. Yeah, dementia. And then when they first have, like, the mom, where you see her in the book, the first thing she's doing is playing Jeopardy. On the TV and getting every question right.
- [23:55]
A
Right. Yeah.
- [23:56]
B
Just to, like, show you that, no, she's not. Does not have dementia. That's all bullshit, too.
- [24:01]
A
Yeah. It's all bullshit that he's been saying so that she won't come out and visit the old winery and find her son. He's always trying to. That's what. Once he was telling her, like, don't come here. I knew that things were weird, but. Yeah. I don't know. I think the reason I was asking about what you think about Derek is because at the end, when they find Sebastian, okay. For a second I thought, oh, it's kind of sad because they're not really back together. They're still living together for the sake of Sebastian. But you realize they're probably not going to stay together.
- [24:41]
B
Right. And I think also the show. Cause sometimes you might give him, like, not the benefit of the doubt, but you might say, okay, I kind of get it. Like, you and your wife have kind of not gone your separate ways, but have been distanced since your kid was kidnapped and you cheated, and maybe it was like a huge mistake because of whatever. But then you find out that he was. He actually cheated on her before all this when she.
- [25:01]
A
Yeah. Right. When she got pregnant.
- [25:03]
B
The shoe. The shoe sale salesman girl at Nordstrom's.
- [25:07]
A
Yeah. Guess who told her about it. Sal.
- [25:10]
B
Sal.
- [25:12]
A
So, yeah. So I think. I think that's the reason at the end. There's a little bit of me that goes, oh, are they going to be back together? Is this. And then they are. They're living together. And you could tell he is kind of like, when are you guys coming home? And I'm making dinner and we're gonna. But she's just basically like, we're together for now.
- [25:31]
B
Yep.
- [25:31]
A
And you don't think they're probably going to end up together after that?
- [25:34]
B
Yeah. Because he's like, oh, can't wait till you guys get home. I miss you. And she's like, okay. And then she says, like, I never know how to react to this anymore.
- [25:42]
A
Yeah. You know, one thing that I. I was confused about is there was. There was a lot of Marin saying, oh, that. That Kenzie looked familiar to her.
- [25:54]
B
Yeah.
- [25:55]
A
There's a couple times where she's like, she. Something familiar about her, but that never comes to fruition. Like, yes, she ended up to be someone that Sal was dating, but she had never met her when Sal was dating her. She didn't know Sal ever dated her. And even when she showed Sal the picture and he just played it off and was, you know, making fun of her, he obviously didn't tell her. So I was waiting for it to be like, oh, wait. Oh, wait. That's why I recognize her. I saw Sal with her one time at this and that. But she never did see sales with her, so I just thought that I was like. I don't know what those little hints were throughout the book saying something. Something about her is familiar to me. But then it never came to fruition.
- [26:36]
B
Right. Yeah. I don't know. I'm trying to think back on everything, because it was. It was weird because she's like. So I have this. Like. We didn't know JR And Style were the same person. Because I have this, like, old boyfriend that I still connect with. And then whenever I talk to him about sleeping with a married man, it turns him on. Did you see that part?
- [27:03]
A
Right. Yeah.
- [27:04]
B
So I don't, like. I don't know why. Why does it. Like, her talking about having sex with Marin's husband Derek turns him on.
- [27:12]
A
Probably because he was like, yeah, you're fucking up that woman's marriage for me. I. Yeah. I mean, listen, this guy didn't. He didn't think things through too great. And he was not a Good man. But that's the kind of, the interesting part is because at the end when, you know, they, they find it Sebastian, they go to the farm and then he ends up just basically says goodbye to her and he, he just ends it later when she's, it says like four months later or whatever it says. And her, you know, they're taking Sebastian to therapy. She's going to introduce him to the people in her group that she's not sure that's going to be a good idea. Whatever. And then we know that Derek's at home waiting for them. And she's just sort of like taking it one day at a time. But she's got these met old messages from Sal. And she's like, I can't bring myself to delete them because he was my best friend. He was my best friend all this time. And I, and then he's also the person that did the worst thing ever to me. I feel like I delete those messages and say, fuck that.
- [28:16]
B
Yeah. Yeah. I mean she really. But that's just one more thing that she loves to torture herself in this book.
- [28:24]
A
Right.
- [28:25]
B
Like she goes to Green Bean and doesn't tell anyone that she, you know what I mean? Like, she doesn't confront, really confront her. She just wants to see Mackenzie. Then when she has that picture of Mackenzie, that naked picture, she takes that naked picture and makes it her screensaver.
- [28:41]
A
I know.
- [28:42]
B
So every time she opens a picture, she sees a naked picture of her husband's mistress. And then she, she's constantly counting every. I understand. Cause she's like, oh, it's been 490 days since like. I understand counting, but that's just more like a torture thing. And then just like just seeing all her husband's texts constantly coming in. I feel like there's like a lot of things that she was. And then the ultimate thing, when she goes to her therapist, she said it was like the secret. All this book. Like I'm doing something. Can't tell or I can't. I, I, I, I'm telling you about it. She's like, you got to stop doing. That's legal. She was going on the Dark Web.
- [29:16]
A
Yeah.
- [29:16]
B
And looking at pictures of battered kids.
- [29:18]
A
Yeah.
- [29:19]
B
Maybe see that her son was going to be on. Like she does like some up things to torture herself. So the fact that she would keep all S's old text kind of adds up kind of par for the course for Marin.
- [29:31]
A
I guess that's a good point. Yeah. That, that, that, that part of the Dark web searching and stuff. Was, was. It was pretty dark, but at the same time I thought it was a little bit realistic, I think.
- [29:44]
B
Yeah. Yeah.
- [29:45]
A
It wouldn't surprise me if people who are looking for their kids are, are desperate and just looking, you know, I mean it wouldn't surp. I mean it's sad, but it actually almost felt like one thing that they might do. But I'll tell you something. I know you'd never have a mistress, but if he ever did and I got ahold of some naked photo of her that she sent you, it's not going to be my fucking screensaver, okay? No, it's going to be. I don't know what it's going to be. It's going to be the end of a lot of things for you, but it's not going to be my screensaver. The last thing I want to see is some, some, you know, tight skinned bitch in her mid-20s every time I look.
- [30:28]
B
Why you painted a picture of my fake mistress?
- [30:31]
A
You're right. She wouldn't be a tight skinned. She'd be some old hag.
- [30:36]
B
Well, why are you doing that?
- [30:38]
A
Yeah, well, why do you care if she's not real?
- [30:43]
B
Because I think it's creepy.
- [30:46]
A
No, but you, yeah, imagine like torturing yourself with. Oh God, the photo of that person. And just. But, but Kenzie also tortures herself, right? She. She goes into their house when they're in whistle.
- [30:59]
B
Oh God. Goes into her house and starts like going through all her stuff. Be like, oh my God, I wish I had this. Oh my God, these Christian Louboutins. I'm gonna display them and take pictures of them. Gonna try them on. I'm an eight and a half season eight. Close enough. I'll squeeze my toes into these things.
- [31:15]
A
And she did all that just after a couple ciders at home. I mean this girl, she. She blamed it on having a couple too many ciders. I'm like, honey, you gotta, you gotta build up your alcohol tolerance. If two ciders is making you get in a cab, break into someone's home and then take photos of their closet that you're gonna post on Instagram, you
- [31:35]
B
go that off the walls, off. You got to have someone just lock you in. You have like, you have to have a lock on the outside of your door. Just say lock it up and bring me out when I'm sober because I can't go out like this.
- [31:44]
A
No, you can't go out like that. You gotta. That was, it was, it was a funny thing when she goes in there and she's. And you're just like, wait, their alarm. You know, she knew. She figured out how to turn their alarm off, but she never reset it. But she's just going around their house. I mean, she knows they're in whistler, but she's. She's in that closet. And I was picturing it because I was like, God, I have a nice closet. John's bitch ever comes in here, you know?
- [32:10]
B
Well, here's the craziest thing. At the end of the book. I don't know if you want to jump ahead to the end of the book. Whatever.
- [32:15]
A
Right. Yeah. Go ahead.
- [32:16]
B
So at the end of the book, it pissed me off because Marin's like, goes to the green bean, where Mackenzie's still working. Which Mackenzie should be in prison, by the way. Okay? For extortion. She should be in prison. I couldn't believe that she wasn't. So she goes there with a bag of money, which. I forget how much they said a
- [32:36]
A
big bag of money in this book. I think 250. I think the same. She paid to have her kill giver,
- [32:43]
B
karma equalizer type thing. I was like, you don't know this? Nothing. Because, well, I like. You know, she was like, oh, I did, like, in her head, she's like, well, I did, like, pay to have her killed.
- [32:52]
A
Right.
- [32:53]
B
With guys that she was also working with. But I thought that was very crazy of her, because I was like, why? And then. But the funniest thing is, is on top of the bag, when she opened it up, she put the. The. The pair of Lobaton shoes on top of it. It. Yes, because just to be like, I knew. You're in my closet, too.
- [33:14]
A
Yeah, because she knew. When she. When Marin gets home, she realizes some things are out of place. Then she finds a receipt from a taxi, which she knows was the night when they were in Whistler because it has the date on it. Because I was like, why are we having her take a. That's the one thing about authors like this is they. Every detail is in there. Because when. When he's like, ma', am, would you like the receipt? I'm like, who needs a receipt? She's not. It's not a business trip. But then we had to know that she had the receipt, because then Marin has to find it later. And then she puts together who was in her house. And then she notices that her shoes have been moved around. And it was a pair that. Yeah. That Kenzie's been admiring. So she decides to throw those in there. And let me tell you something. Like, I Said I got a nice closet. You can see it on my Instagram @Sarah Colona 1. I did a video recently and a bunch of people said I did it to show off my closet. I didn't but it is in there. And a lot of shoes behind me and a lot of them are Louboutins. And you bang some dumb girl that breaks into our house. She's not getting any of my shoes.
- [34:20]
B
I guess not, baby.
- [34:22]
A
This is Marin giving away 250. Give it. She said that it would set. This is what I paid to to have you killed. And even though I back down, she
- [34:32]
B
already lost out on that 250. Now she's going to lose on another 250.
- [34:36]
A
And then she says here's the shoes on top of it. And Kenzie says thanks.
- [34:42]
B
Here's the thing is they act super rich. Then every once in a while she says something that's not super rich. Like oh, it's basically like, oh, it's not a big deal to get 250 grand. And then there's like it's not a big deal to get a million dollars. Just takes me a couple days. And then she's like oh, I have this one pair of shoes. These Christian Louis Vuittons that were a splurge yourself. Your hand shoes were complete splurge but you just splash around a quarter million dollars all willy nilly.
- [35:06]
A
Well, maybe that's why they have money is because she doesn't splurge all the time on her loop.
- [35:10]
B
Well, I'd rather have a little bit of money and have a bunch of Lobaton.
- [35:19]
A
Yeah. You know the scene when. Because we've covered like most of that stuff but I just want to know a I some thoughts. You know the scene when Kenzie goes to do her laundry Y And I think the guy's name is Ted. He's like the apartment manager, superintendent or something. Yeah, he comes in there and like her. So she's at first of all, did you ever live in a building where you had to. Did you ever have to go to the laundromat? I just want to ask that.
- [35:44]
B
Many, many years.
- [35:45]
A
Okay. So you look. I will say this. I was lucky. I never lived in an apartment building somehow that didn't have laundry at least on site. So okay, my. My first apartment in. Yeah in. We had like a stackable. I guess I don't know how I always managed to have laundry on site. And then. And even in college and then so I never had to go laundromats. But then in the apartment I lived in by myself for the. For the longest amount of time we had. It was only like six apartments, and we had one laundry room downstairs that, now that I remember, was a little bit creepy. But it was downstairs. Right in the middle of Hollywood. But it was. It was downstairs. And, you know, every once in a while it was dark out. Sometimes the laundry got left overnight down there, and I'd go back in the morning when it was light to get it because it was kind of creepy going down there and it needed quarters. And in this. I think she needs like a. A card. Card that you have to reload anyway, so I just thought that was interesting. But I. But Ted comes in and he's just creepy to her. And he's like. He says something about helping her with her money or help giving her money off his card. And then she. And. And I forget the exact interaction, but he's like, isn't that what you. Like, guys? That was money to help you. He's being real fucking weird.
- [37:07]
B
And then she's like, oh, I'll slip the money under your door later. He goes, oh, no, why don't I just come by your work sometime? You can give me a free coffee.
- [37:13]
A
Yeah. And he's like, what's your schedule? And she's not telling him. And that. That never panned out to be anything at all. Right, Right. No, but I think the. But that's what the point is sometimes, right? It's little red herrings. Is that the red. Right. Term to sort of throw you off, to make you think, oh, this Ted's going to be the guy that's been following her. And then. Oh, right, right. Because she's always thinking someone's following her. And it was. So I guess that's what that was. But it was a creepy interaction. And then. Really, I just wanted to know. I just wanted you to know I never had to go to the Laundromat.
- [37:46]
B
Well, it's a rough place I had in college. I think I had a laundry thing in the basement. Or I just go to my mom's, but I think usually the basement, the dryer was only a quarter and it would dry your clothes. Literally, fire came out of the back of this dryer. Fire. It was a fire hazard. And you could dry your clothes in, like, four minutes. It was incredible. It was like.
- [38:10]
A
Because it was on fire,
- [38:14]
B
it was incredible. Then when I played my first or my two years that I played in the Canadian Football League for Winnipeg, I had to go to Laundromat because we didn't have anything on at the. At the apartment or anything. And then when I lived in the Motel 6, also, I had to go to Laundromat.
- [38:29]
A
Yeah.
- [38:30]
B
When you have a go. When you have to go to a Laundromat, you wear every freaking clean pair of socks, every clean pair of shoe, every shirt, everything before you go.
- [38:41]
A
You save it.
- [38:43]
B
Yeah. You know, there's like, that joke, like, college kids, like, taking off all their clothes at the Laundromat to wash them. Getting pretty close to that. Because you do not want to go there more than you have to.
- [38:52]
A
Right. It's just. Sounds like a pain in the ass, too. So I don't know how I got in the thing.
- [38:57]
B
You just. You stand there for an hour and a half.
- [39:00]
A
Yeah. Stand there with your dick in your hands.
- [39:02]
B
You know what?
- [39:03]
A
Literally, it's on.
- [39:04]
B
Yeah. They got to put bars in those things.
- [39:07]
A
We had a place. I told you we had a place in Fayetteville called Soap Insides.
- [39:11]
B
God, I don't think I was listening to you.
- [39:15]
A
Not. Not just now, but I told you that before. I'm gonna see if I can. Soap and suds, especially, like, on a college campus.
- [39:22]
B
That's. That's brilliant.
- [39:24]
A
Yeah. Soap and Suds. Modern card. I put a lot. No, it's okay. It's not. That's not it. That's not the right name.
- [39:31]
B
Okay.
- [39:32]
A
No, but it's because it's. It was something that had. Had something that, like, made sense. Fayetteville, Arkansas.
- [39:43]
B
Wasn't here. Wasn't here. Wasn't your, like, liquor store called, like, Dick Liquor or something?
- [39:48]
A
Oh, Dixon Street Liquor. And we call it Dick Liquors. Yeah. Because it was on Dixon Street. There's that. Well, I don't know if it used to be Soap and Says, but I just put in Laundromat Fable, Arkansas with beer. And there's a place called Sit and Sp. Bin, a restaurant and 247 Laundromat in Fville offers local craft beer and wine while you wash. Ok. Located on Lever Avenue. I like it. But that Sit and Spin was not the one that I was thinking of. Oh, they call it a lounge on TripAdvisor. But I thought. I did think it was called Soap and Suds because the suds I thought was supposed to be the beer, but when I put in soap and suds, that's like a big chain Laundromat. Anyway, if you guys are all paying me to stop saying soap and suds, I understand. So. Okay. So, yeah, Ted was just kind of a red herring. He didn't really turn out to be anything other than creepy. I did like the story in a weird way about learning about Kenzie's past with this stuff with being the professional girlfriend, how the one guy, Paul, how his wife came over and just, like, lost.
- [41:01]
B
Which is the appropriate thing. Which. The appropriate thing to do.
- [41:04]
A
Yeah, that's more appropriate. I mean, I don't know if I'd be a Marin or a Paul's wife, but I think I'm a Paul's wife. Yeah, right. I don't think I'm gonna go in and see the girl and keep my together. And like I said, I'm not for sure not going to put her phone. Her naked photo on my. On my phone screen. I'm gonna be Paul's wife. I'm gonna be in. I'm gonna go to the. Knocking on the door, making a absolute scene, losing my. And. And that was funny because even that her friend Izzy and her be. They. They stopped being friends after that because Izzy was pissed off at her for. For that scene happening. And then Kenzie was pissed off at Izzy for not helping her get rid of Paul's wife. And then it turns out the whole time she was screaming, she was screaming at Izzy because she thought Izzy, for some reason was the girl the Paul was banging. But really it was Kenzie. And boy, did Marin like telling Derek later on that he wasn't the first that Kenzie's tried to shake down for money. You know, when she tells him later, she's like, oh, did you think you were special like this? Her and her friend literally do this for a living. They find dumb married guys with a lot of money, they bang them and then blackmail them later. This is your fault. I like that.
- [42:21]
B
You know. You know what you would do? You would go to someone's house and you know it be playing like, full blast on your radio as you went there.
- [42:30]
A
Rage against the machine, Lincoln.
- [42:32]
B
No. I'm going to aim my headlights in your bedroom window. Oh, redneck crazy. You go full on redneck crazy.
- [42:41]
A
Oh, guys, he is right. That is a. I don't want to start a fight.
- [42:48]
B
I'm up for anything tonight.
- [42:51]
A
It's Tyler Farr. Gonna drive like hell through your neighborhood. How does it go? I'm gonna aim my headlights into your bedroom windows. Throw empty beer cans at both of your shadows. I didn't come here to start a fight. But I'm up for anything tonight. You know you broke the wrong heart,
- [43:23]
B
baby and drove me redneck crazy.
- [43:29]
A
Oh, we harmonized. That's a good song. Can I tell you, by the way, our clip last week about Bare Naked Ladies. Boy, do people some have opinions. So we were talking about it and John started singing the Chickadee Chinese Chicken. And you guys have seen it. It's on the book list, Instagram. Oh, join the book listeners on Facebook. But, you know, we put up a clip of that so it's out of context. And of course, sometimes things get passed around. And this is what I always hate. I mean, I get some comment. What do you know? You're not Canadian. If you were Canadian, you'd understand. They're Canadian royalty. And I'm like, my husband's Canadian. It was a joke. That's why I asked him about it. And I. And it's a clip from a podcast. You know, somebody's like, what's your point of all this? And I'm like, the. It's from a.
- [44:23]
B
Just your point of all.
- [44:24]
A
What do you think this is? You think this was the full. Like, it's obviously a clip from something. And. But then. But most people are normal and just comment like that. Oh, they. Wait, you forgot? You know, there are some really good songs. A lot of people, they listen, they love their Bare Naked Ladies. And then I remembered some that I said. And by the way, I said during the podcast, I love Brian Wilson. I think that's a great song. I said, and I like that. Even in the clip, I say, I like the one song I just made. You say underwear. That one.
- [44:55]
B
There was a song that I forgot about. Like, I think it's called My Old Apartment.
- [44:58]
A
That's a good song. It's a good song. So to all those who really wanted to get ramped up, I mean, you don't listen to the podcast anyway because you were commenting from out of nowhere. But, you know, things are out of context. Sometimes you people just don't know how to have fun. I just want to get ramped up being stupid.
- [45:16]
B
If you want to get ramped up about a fun clip on a podcast, go fuck yourself. At the end of the day, just go and absolutely fuck yourself.
- [45:27]
A
It is why I enjoyed it, though. It's why when I. I was like, I forgot. So people get so passionate about their. Their music, but mostly it was good people chiming in, a lot of Canadians and a lot of just people chiming in. Reminded me of some good songs. Old Apartment's a real good one. I just don't like the way they say chicken to Chinese chicken. And I told you that in the clip. I made it real clear. So that was my point, Mr. Person that stumbled upon our feet and gave an opinion.
- [45:56]
B
Canadians are really nice until they're not like, oh my God, we're just so nice. Oh my God, we're so nice. So what you say about hockey? I'll fucking kill you. Hockey's the fucking best. Oh, yeah. Oh, you don't like social health care? Fuck you. It's like call. But no, I didn't say anything. I was just asking you about your band aid.
- [46:18]
A
I like your angry Canadian voice.
- [46:21]
B
They flip real quick. I can say that because I'm Canadian, so calm down.
- [46:25]
A
Yeah. People that stumble upon this don't know what we're talking about. Okay. So I loved the twist. I was glad Sebastian was okay. I didn't, you know, once it started to all come out, I. I figured out it was S. Before she really told us. But I. I wasn't expecting that. All that. I. Even though when I've described the book today, tonight during our review, it sounded confusing. I'm going to give her five. Five out of five martinis because I enjoyed it. And all the. The fact that she could keep up with all her twists as well as she did and plant little seeds along the way were really impressive. And Maren being an off the rails, angry lady that just wants someone. A hit out on someone because they're banging her husband and. And all those. I take it all and I give her a five out of five. This was. This was a very me enjoyed, well enjoyed book.
- [47:29]
B
I give it 10 and a half out of 12 years.
- [47:32]
A
Okay.
- [47:33]
B
I enjoyed it.
- [47:36]
A
Yeah. And I will say I want to tell the listeners one more thing. I still haven't picked. I don't. We don't announce until next week, so it may not be the book I mentioned earlier. I haven't told you what June's pick is, but one thing that the listeners have given me is I don't Google the end of books at all anymore. And I've tried to. I tried to stop before it does not ruin the book for me. I want that clear. I don't. If you. Oh, you ruin it for yourself. Nope. And Google the end and then I can relax. It's like watching traders. That's why I love traders. Because you know the whole time who the traders are. I don't have to make any fucking guesses. Okay. It's genius.
- [48:15]
B
That's a good point.
- [48:16]
A
Yeah. It's why I love that show. I know the whole time. So I'm.
- [48:23]
B
Sometimes when they hid the trailer for like one episode, it drove us crazy.
- [48:26]
A
Yeah, I didn't like that even though I knew it was going to be Donna Kelce. But I was like, this is the thing about. It doesn't bother me to read the end of. To Google the end of a book. The spoiler. Because then I relax and then I'm like idiots. While I'm reading it. You know the characters. I'm like, you idiot. You don't know who it is. I know who it is. But I will say I stopped doing it because I want to have the. The correct opinion of a book to suggest. So that's why I don't know yet if I'm picking this book because I don't know how it ends yet. And if they do, they pull some crazy shit where it ends and it makes me angry and I don't like it, then I don't want it to be my pick. Right. So I'm just telling you, if I would have already googled it, I'd probably already have picked it. But thank you listeners for keeping me honest in my reactions.
- [49:19]
B
Okay.
- [49:20]
A
Okay. Remind them of the May book one more time.
- [49:22]
B
Summer Romance by Annabelle Monaghan.
- [49:26]
A
Yes. And we will see you next week. And don't forget Patreon. $5 a month for just fun bonus content. Short stories on the 15th, which is so fun. 5th and the 25th. John and Sarah have at it. We just have at her and their video. So they're fun. Not in the way that not like only fans have at her. Don't worry. So you guys get it.
- [49:49]
B
Way more than $5 a month for that.
- [49:53]
A
Yeah. Okay, Time to get out of here. See you guys next week. Bye. The book list, the book lisp. The book list the book lisp the book lisp.