#122 - Joby Martin // When Jesus Wept: Why Strong Men Must Embrace Their Emotions

Summary

Episode Summary: #122 - Joby Martin // When Jesus Wept: Why Strong Men Must Embrace Their Emotions

Release Date: June 19, 2025
Hosts: Joby Martin & Kyle Thompson
Podcast: The Daily Blade

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Introduction to Emotions in Christian Life

In this poignant episode of The Daily Blade, hosts Joby Martin and Kyle Thompson delve into the profound topic of emotions, particularly focusing on the biblical narrative of Jesus weeping over Lazarus in John Chapter 11. This discussion aims to challenge conventional perceptions of masculinity and emotional expression among men, encouraging listeners to view emotions as divine gifts essential for navigating life's complexities.

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Deep Dive into John Chapter 11

Kyle Thompson initiates the conversation by walking listeners through John 11, highlighting the profound emotional display by Jesus. He meticulously recounts the events leading up to Jesus weeping:

• Mary's Grief: Kyle explains how Mary, deeply mourning her brother Lazarus's death, confronts Jesus with heartfelt sorrow. He notes, "She falls off of her feet onto her face at the feet of Jesus. And she says to him, it's more like she cries out to him, 'Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died'" (03:15).

• Jesus's Reaction: The discussion emphasizes Jesus's authentic emotional response. Kyle clarifies the meaning behind "Jesus wept," stating, "Now, this actually means, like, snort. Like it's kind of a kind of an angry cry kind of thing. But Jesus wept" (04:05). This underscores that even the strongest individuals experience genuine emotions in the face of loss and suffering.

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Embracing Emotions as a Strength

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to redefining strength for men within a Christian context. Kyle argues against the societal notion that equating emotional suppression with strength. He passionately asserts:

"Withholding emotion does not equal strength. Jesus is the strongest man who has ever lived. And he cried."
— Kyle Thompson (04:50)

He further critiques contemporary figures like Jordan Peterson, suggesting that their views may overlook the importance of emotional expression. Kyle shares personal experiences to illustrate his point, recounting how he and his ministry team wept while praying for an elder's grandchild with severe physical needs. This vulnerability, he believes, exemplifies true strength and alignment with Christ-like empathy.

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Biblical Foundations for Emotional Expression

Kyle references Ecclesiastes 3 to highlight the biblical acknowledgment of a "time and season for everything under heaven," encompassing a wide range of emotions—from laughter and singing to mourning and ceasing from dancing. He emphasizes that:

"When people go through sad times and don't allow themselves the appropriate expression of that emotion... they don't have the ability to laugh when it's time to laugh."
— Kyle Thompson (02:45)

This scripture serves as a foundation for his argument that embracing emotions is not only natural but also spiritually beneficial.

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Practical Applications in Ministry

The hosts discuss how individuals, especially men, can better support others in times of distress. Kyle advises that effective ministry doesn't always require eloquent words but rather presence and empathy:

"Sometimes you just need to sit with them for a while, put your arm around them and cry with them. This is what Jesus does."
— Kyle Thompson (05:10)

He encourages listeners to mirror Jesus's approach by offering genuine emotional support, thereby fostering deeper connections and providing meaningful comfort.

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God's Eternal Presence

Concluding the episode, Kyle reinforces the assurance of God's unwavering presence:

"God is eternally present with you in every situation that you are in... God weeps with those who weep."
— Kyle Thompson (05:35)

This affirmation serves to remind listeners that they are never alone in their emotional struggles, and that embracing these emotions aligns them closer to God's everlasting companionship.

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Final Thoughts

Joby Martin wraps up the episode by urging listeners to share the podcast and support their mission to equip men for life's battles. The overarching message of the episode champions the idea that true strength lies in the courage to embrace and express one's emotions, aligning with the compassionate nature of Jesus Christ.

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Key Takeaways

• Emotions Are Divine Gifts: Embracing emotions is essential for personal and spiritual growth.
• Redefining Strength: True strength involves the ability to express vulnerability and empathy.
• Biblical Support: Scriptures like John 11 and Ecclesiastes 3 validate the natural flow of emotions.
• Practical Empathy: Effective ministry involves being present and emotionally supportive rather than solely relying on words.
• God’s Presence: Believers are reassured of God's constant companionship in every emotional state.

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By unpacking these themes, Episode #122 of The Daily Blade provides a compassionate and biblically grounded perspective on the importance of emotional expression for men, encouraging listeners to integrate these insights into their daily lives for a more fulfilled and authentic Christian walk.

Transcript

[Joby Martin]

Welcome to the Daily Blade. The word of God is described as the sword of the spirit, the primary spiritual weapon in the Christian's armor against the forces of evil. Your hosts are Joby Martin and Kyle Thompson, and they stand ready to equip men for the fight. Let's sharpen up.

[Kyle Thompson]

Welcome back to the Daily Blade. This is our fourth day in a deep dive on John, chapter 11. And men, we need to talk about this one. Emotions. Kyle's talked about this a lot. I talk about this a lot. And I think most men, and even some really smart ones are way off on how men ought to handle their emotions. We'll pick it up in verse 28. And the Bible says this. When she said this, she went. That's Martha. Martha went and called her sister Mary, saying in private, the teacher is here and is calling for you. And when Mary heard it, she rose quickly and she went to him. Now, Jesus had not yet come into the village, but was still in the place where Martha had met him. And when the Jews who were with her in the house consoling her, saw Mary rise quickly and go out, they followed her, supposing that she was going to the tomb to weep there. This is what I told you earlier in the week. This would be like the crowd of people that would go and mourn with the person who had lost somebody they love. Verse 32. Now, when Mary came to where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet. All right, this was not a polite bow. She falls down on her feet at. She falls off of her feet onto her face at the feet of Jesus. And she says to him, it's more like she cries out to him, lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died. And when Jesus saw her weeping and the Jews who had come with her also weeping, he was deeply moved. The word is splugitzomai. Moved from the gut. And his spirit was greatly troubled. And Jesus said, where have you laid him? And they said to Jesus, lord, come and see. And then you get John 11:35, the shortest verse in the whole Bible. And Jesus wept. Now, this actually means, like, snort. Like it's kind of a. Kind of an angry cry kind of thing. But Jesus wept. Jesus displays the appropriate emotion in this very, very sad scene where Mary and Mar. Martha have loved their brother that not only they love deeply, but Jesus also loved. And so the Jews said, see how he loved him. But some of them said, could not he who opened the eyes of the blind man also have kept this man from dying? All right. Let's talk about emotions. A lot of men aren't good, good at emotions, but I need you to know that emotions are a gift from God. Emotions make a terrible God, but they help us navigate this life that God has called us to live in that. If you look at Ecclesiastes 3, there is a list of all kinds of emotion. It says that there is a time or a season for everything under heaven. There's a time to laugh. There's a time to cry. There's a time to sing. There's a time to mourn. There's a time to live. There's a time to die. There's a time to dance. And there's a time to cease from dancing. And what I have noticed in my 32 years of ministry is that when people go through sad times and don't allow themselves the appropriate expression of that emotion and they don't allow themselves to cry when it's time to cry, then they don't have the ability to laugh when it's time to laugh. Listen, I don't know who made this up. Like, if you go to a funeral and somebody says, you know what? You got to be strong. And someone equated withholding emotion to strength. That is not what strength is. Jesus is the strongest man who has ever lived. And he cried. Listen, Jordan Peterson is wrong about this. I don't know if he was just off that day, but with being the one person at your dad's funeral that doesn't cry, that doesn't equal strength. Now, you do need to be the anchor. You need to take responsibility. You can be the rock. But I hope that you were strong enough to cry. I hope that you can be strong and be a man and cry. I cry. I cried. This week. I was praying for one of our elders who has a grandchild with some severe physical needs who was just born. And we wept and wept as we prayed for that child. And I know I'm not weak. You see what Jesus is going to do initially, he's initially going to sympathize with Mary before he ever tries to solve the problem. And this is something that we can often do. You see, oftentimes when we are ministering to people who are in great need, we're always trying to look for the right words. And honestly, sometimes words won't help people. Sometimes you just need to sit with them for a while, put your arm around them and cry with them. This is what Jesus does. You see, the name of God is I am that. I am that. God is the eternal present. And what I want you to know is that God is eternally present with you in every situation that you are in. Even though he knows the end and the outcome. I mean, think about this. The Bible says God weeps with those who weep. And even though Jesus knows that in just a few sentences he's going to bring Lazarus out of the grave, that's what we're going to talk about tomorrow. Even though he knows what, in 30 minutes, 45 minutes? The Bible doesn't say how long that this thing is going to end in a party. But in that moment, he knows that what he wants to do, the incarnate Christian is going to put his arm around Mary and just weep with those who weep. So don't feel the pressure to say something awesome when you're ministering to someone in pain. You just put your arm around them, say, I know I love you. And when you walk through the valley of the shadow of death, just know that we serve the kind of God that sends his son, the kind of God that gets dirty and that weeps with those who weeps. So men, I dare you, be strong enough to weep with those who weep.

[Joby Martin]

Thank you for listening to today's episode. Before you go, if you want to help, equip other men for the fight. Share this podcast around and leave us a five star rating and review. Stay sharp.