The Daily Blade – Episode #223

Title: Joby Martin // If Dad Loves Mom First, Everyone Flourishes
Released: November 7, 2025
Hosts: Joby Martin & Kyle Thompson

Episode Overview

This episode focuses on the critical role of a father's love for his children’s mother within the family. Pastor Joby Martin argues that one of the greatest gifts a father can offer his children is to love their mother deeply and visibly, establishing a sense of security and order at home. Drawing from scripture and personal ministry experience, Joby emphasizes that when a husband prioritizes his wife (after Christ), the entire family flourishes.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Importance of a Father Loving Mom First

• "One of the best gifts that you can ever give to your kids as a dad is to love Mom."
  • (Joby Martin, [00:23])
• Security comes from a loving marriage, not just from providing experiences or opportunities for children.
• Many children may be “experientially rich and relationally poor” due to a lack of security at home.

2. Personal Ministry Experience

• Joby recalls 15 years of student ministry observing teenagers who had material wealth but lacked emotional and relational security. The root issue was often a household without the foundation of parental love.
  • Quote: "I saw folks that had everything this world had to offer, and yet they were steeped in insecurity because they knew when they got home, the home wasn’t secure. Because dad did not love Mom." ([01:15])

3. Biblical Foundation: Ephesians 5

• The scriptural model for the home is rooted in Ephesians 5:25 and following:
  • Husbands are called to love their wives as Christ loved the Church, sacrificing and cherishing her.
  • Quote: “‘Husbands love your wife as Christ loved the Church, gave himself up for her ... let each one of you love his wife as himself. And let the wife see that she respects her husband.’” ([01:48])

4. Practical Application: Prioritizing the Marriage

• Be public and unapologetic about putting the marriage first:
  • Date nights and “no kids allowed” boundaries reinforce to children that their parents' relationship is a priority.
  • Quote: “It is a really healthy and right and good thing for your children to see you and mom walk out the door to go on dates ... And you look at them and say, no, you cannot come ... I love her first.” ([02:56])
• Honor and Protection: Fathers should never tolerate disrespect toward their wives from their children.
  • Quote: "You do not let your children disrespect your wife … I made a vow to your mama, okay? There’s no way this household makes it without her." ([03:27])
• Creation Order: The home should not be centered on the children but ordered with God, marriage, and then children.
  • When parents center their marriage, it helps ground their kids, providing security and preventing child-centered households.

5. Parenting as a Unified Team

• Spouses who love and respect each other naturally parent as a cohesive team, making it easier to raise children in the Christian faith.

6. The Call to Action: Scheduling Priorities

• Men are challenged to prioritize—not just fill—a schedule. The encouragement is to make marriage a non-negotiable priority, taking action by dating and vacationing with their spouse.
  • Quote: “You don’t prioritize your schedule; you schedule your priorities. And a priority to be a great dad is to take mama on a date.” ([04:13])

7. Spiritual Charge and Encouragement

• The episode closes with Joby returning to a key scripture:
  • Quote: “I have no greater joy than to hear my children are walking in the truth.” (3 John v.4) ([04:34])
• The focus: As men lean into Jesus, they’ll be empowered to become godly fathers who raise children walking in truth.

Notable Quotes & Timestamps

• "One of the best gifts that you can ever give to your kids as a dad is to love Mom."
  — Joby Martin ([00:23])
• “I saw folks that had everything this world had to offer, and yet they were steeped in insecurity because they knew when they got home, the home wasn’t secure.”
  — Joby Martin ([01:15])
• “It is a really healthy and right and good thing for your children to see you and mom walk out the door to go on dates ... 'I love her first.'”
  — Joby Martin ([02:56])
• “You do not let your children disrespect your wife … there’s no way this household makes it without her.”
  — Joby Martin ([03:27])
• “You don’t prioritize your schedule; you schedule your priorities. And a priority to be a great dad is to take mama on a date.”
  — Joby Martin ([04:13])
• “I have no greater joy than to hear my children are walking in the truth.”
  — Joby Martin quoting 3 John v.4 ([04:34])

Timestamps for Key Segments

• [00:23] – The best gift for your kids: Love Mom
• [01:15] – The danger of relationally poor, experientially rich children
• [01:48] – Scriptural foundation from Ephesians 5
• [02:56] – Making your marriage visibly primary to your kids
• [03:27] – Insisting on respect towards mom in the household
• [04:13] – Scheduling priorities: put your marriage first
• [04:34] – The ultimate goal: children walking in truth

Tone Notes

The tone throughout the episode is direct, encouraging, occasionally humorous, and full of pastoral urgency. Joby speaks candidly to men, rooting his advice in scripture and real-life experience, challenging listeners to reflect honestly and to adjust their priorities for the good of their families.

Summary

If you haven’t listened: This short but impactful episode centers on the principle that when fathers love and prioritize their wives, the entire family—especially the children—will flourish. Security, godly upbringing, and true joy stem from a biblical family order rooted in Christ and marital love, not activity-packed schedules or worldly success. Joby Martin’s message is practical, scriptural, and challenges men to act in faithful, tangible ways for the sake of their children and homes.