#311 - Kyle Thompson // TOXIC vs. TETHERED: Godly Emotions - The Daily Blade: Joby Martin & Kyle Thompson

Summary4 min read

Podcast Summary

The Daily Blade, Episode #311

Title: Kyle Thompson // TOXIC vs. TETHERED: Godly Emotions
Date: March 11, 2026
Hosts: Joby Martin & Kyle Thompson

Episode Overview

This episode examines the cultural accusation that stoic masculinity—defined as emotional restraint or suppression—is inherently "toxic." Joby Martin and Kyle Thompson challenge this narrative, using Scripture to present an alternative: Tethered Masculinity—a man's identity and actions submitted to the authority of God’s word. The discussion explores how men should engage with their emotions in a way that honors God, using biblical examples to differentiate between toxic emotional suppression and godly emotional governance.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Defining Stoicism: Ancient Philosophy vs. Pop Culture

Kyle Thompson (00:20):
- Clarifies that the episode distinguishes between the ancient Stoic philosophy of people like Marcus Aurelius and the "lowercase s" stoicism commonly critiqued today (emotional restraint and silent suffering).
- Critiques society’s self-contradictory stance: "The same atheistic, confused culture will say that men need to process and express their emotions openly and honestly while simultaneously castigating those men for doing so, because it would infringe on the sincerely held emotions of women. So go figure. You're screwed either way." (00:49)

2. The Dangers of True Emotional Suppression

Kyle Thompson (01:30):
- Acknowledges that unhealthy emotional suppression can lead to harmful behaviors—violence, abuse, addiction—which genuinely are toxic.
- Raises the critical question: "But is that how a tethered man acts? Does a tethered man just suppress all of his emotions all of the time?"

3. Biblical Examples of Emotional Honesty

David’s Psalms (02:10):
- Highlights how King David didn’t suppress emotion but processed deeply and publicly through lament psalms (e.g., Psalm 13):
  
  “‘How long, O Lord, will you forget me forever?... How long must I have sorrow in my heart all the day?’" (Kyle, quoting Psalm 13, 02:24)
- Kyle observes: "Does it sound like David is just stuffing his emotions down? Does it sound like he's just trying to have a stiff upper lip? I mean, it just doesn't sound like it to me." (02:40)
Jesus Weeping (John 11) (03:05):
- Details when Jesus openly wept at Lazarus’s death, emphasizing Jesus's full expression of grief:
  
  "Jesus, the Son of God, part of the Godhead, wept. And, guys, don’t get it twisted. Jesus didn’t just, like, shed a little tear... He wept. So the text suggests that this was like an ugly cry." (03:16)
- Makes the point that Jesus models appropriate and public emotional expression.

4. Governing Emotions vs. Suppressing Them

Summarizes the tension: "So does that mean, as men, we just go around blubbering about everything at all times? I mean, of course not, but there are certainly times when processing emotions and even crying is what is needed in the moment." (03:50)
Contrasts the two approaches:
- Toxic stoicism = Emotional suppression.
- Tethered masculinity = Emotions governed by God’s word and will.
Wraps up with King David’s example of emotional processing leading to trust and worship:

“‘But I have trusted in your steadfast love; my heart shall rejoice in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, because he has dealt bountifully with me.’” (Psalm 13:5-6, quoted by Kyle, 04:05)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

Kyle Thompson on Cultural Contradictions (00:49):

"The same atheistic, confused culture will say that men need to process and express their emotions... while simultaneously castigating those men for doing so..."
On Scriptural Modeling of Emotions (03:16):

"Jesus, the Son of God... wept. And, guys, don’t get it twisted. Jesus didn’t just, like, shed a little tear... He wept. So the text suggests that this was like an ugly cry."
Final Reflective Challenge (04:50):

"To you listening to this, have you bought the cultural lie that your masculine stoicism is somehow toxic? And if you haven’t, have you tethered your masculine stoicism to God’s word and his will for your life? Keep those questions in mind today."

Key Timestamps

00:20 – Introduction to the topic: toxic masculinity and stoicism.
01:30 – The real dangers of unhealthy emotional suppression.
02:10 – David’s Psalms as examples of emotional honesty.
03:05 – Jesus's response at Lazarus’s death—emotional authenticity.
04:05 – The conclusion of Psalm 13: trust in God after honest lament.
04:50 – Reflective challenge to the listeners.

Tone and Style

The hosts’ tone is direct, passionate, and challenging, with a conversational and biblically grounded approach. They mix scriptural reflection with cultural critique, seeking to encourage men toward honest emotional expression that is biblically governed rather than culturally defined.

Takeaway

The episode contends that while unhealthy emotional suppression can be toxic, the biblical model for men is not unfeeling stoicism, but tethered masculinity: emotions honestly expressed and governed by Scripture. The challenge for listeners is to examine whether their emotional habits are formed more by cultural narratives or by the example of Christ and the saints.

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Transcript3 lines

[00:01]
A
Welcome to the Daily Blade. The word of God is described as the sword of the spirit, the primary spiritual weapon in the Christian's armor against the forces of evil. Your hosts are Joby Martin and Kyle Thompson, and they stand ready to equip men for the fight. Let's sharpen up.
[00:20]
B
Good to have you guys back today. This week we're putting toxic masculinity on trial. So we're taking the culture's accusations against men, lining them up and measuring them against scripture. So we're going to keep coming back to one anchor point, tethered masculinity. And our definition for that is it's the identity and actions of a man submitted to the authority of scripture. So let's go to cultural claim number three. Stoicism is emotional suppression. So I want to make something clear right from the jump here for this episode. I'm not talking about the philosophy, right? Or. Or you could call it a worldview of Stoicism. So that started around 300 BC in Athens. And you've likely read some of the stuff by the Stoics, as they were called, you know, Marcus Aurelius, Seneca the Younger, and so on. That's S Stoicism. The Stoicism I'm talking about, I guess, lowercase Stoic. Lowercase S. Stoicism is about the personality trait that prioritizes emotional restraint, emotional suppression, silent suffering, composion under pressure. You know, stuff like that. And that is the claim that culture is referring to. If a man is stoic, that means he's suppressing his healthy emotions and that's toxic or whatever. And it's actually pretty interesting because the same atheistic, confused culture will say that men need to process and express their emotions openly and honestly while simultaneously castigating those men for doing so, because it would infringe on the sincerely held emotions of women. So go figure. You're. You're screwed either way. And look, in some ways, the culture is right. When men suppress their emotions or refuse to process them in a healthy way, men will typically lash out and do unhealthy things. They can get violent, they can get abusive. They can become slaves to addictions of many kinds. And so that's not good. It's toxic, actually. But is that how a tethered man acts? Does a tethered man just suppress all of his emotions all of the time? And in all circumstances, does a tethered man lash out and destroy people and things around them? Right. I mean, let's see what the Bible has to say about it. Almost immediately When I was working through this, I thought about King David and some of his Psalms of Lament. And in those, David is outwardly processing huge emotions. And here we are thousands of years later, and we can go to the Bible and read them. So Psalm 13 is actually a really great example. How long, O Lord, will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I counsel, take counsel in my soul and have sorrow in my heart all the day? How long shall my enemy be exalted over me? Consider and answer me, O Lord my God, Lift up my eyes lest I sleep the sleep of death. Lest my enemy say, I have prevailed over him. Lest my foes rejoice because I am shaken. So does it sound like David is just stuffing his emotions down? Does it sound like he's just trying to have a stiff upper lip? I mean, it just doesn't sound like it to me. And let's go to John 11. So this is where we see Jesus's good buddy Lazarus die. Jesus and the apostles go to the place of his death. And when he arrives, Mary, Lazarus sister confronts Jesus and says that Lazarus wouldn't have died if Jesus had just gotten there in time. And then John 11:35. I know many of you have that verse memorized because you were challenged to memorize a verse at some point in your life, and you thought it'd be funny to memorize the shortest verse in all of the Bible. And it's this. Jesus wept. Jesus, the Son of God, part of the Godhead, wept. And, guys, don't get it twisted. Jesus didn't just, like, shed a little tear. He didn't have a quick sniffle before he got his crap together. He wept. So the text suggests that this was like an ugly cry. Like tears, snot, ugly, angry crying, right? Angry at death, angry at the circumstances. But Jesus, who we are to model our entire lives after, did not suppress his emotions. He didn't wait until he could be in private so that he could let it all out. He wept right there in front of everyone. So does that mean, as men, we just go around blubbering about everything at all times? I mean, of course not, but there are certainly times when processing emotions and even crying is what is needed in the moment. So as we wrap, let's actually go back to the end of Psalm 13. This is David, and it's verses 5 and 6. But I have trusted in your steadfast love. My heart shall rejoice in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord because he has dealt Bountifully with me. So toxic stoicism equals suppression. But tethered stoicism, if you will, equals governed emotions. So to you listening to this, have you bought the cultural lie that your masculine stoicism is somehow toxic? And if you haven't, have you tethered your masculine stoicism to God's word and his will for your life? Keep those questions in mind today.
[05:11]
A
Thank you for listening to today's episode. Before you go, if you want to help, equip other men for the fight, share this podcast around and leave us a five star rating and review. Stay sharp.