729 - The Lemongello's

Summary

The Dollop – Episode 729: The Lemongello’s

Date: April 14, 2026
Hosts: Dave Anthony & Gareth Reynolds
Main Theme:
A quixotic deep-dive into the offbeat American saga of the Lemongello family—crooner Peter Lemongello, his athletic cousin Mark, their brushes with fleeting stardom, oddball business ventures, emotional volatility, family strife, arson, kidnapping, and the strange world of 1970s infomercial stardom and minor celebrity meltdowns.

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Episode Overview

This episode explores the intertwined fates of Peter Lemongello—a once-hopeful crooner and unlikely infomercial music pioneer—and his cousin Mark Lemongello, a baseball pitcher whose career was marked by talent and spectacular rage. It’s a Dollop-style journey highlighting American pop culture's weirder corners, dashed dreams, unprocessed traumas, and the perils of trying too hard to “make it” against the zeitgeist.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Peter Lemongello: A Voice in the Wrong Era

• Early Life & Influences

  • Born in Jersey City, New Jersey to a music-loving, Sinatra-worshipping family ([05:09]).
  • Not a fan of school; thought teachers wore cheap jewelry ([06:12], [06:20]).
  • Brother Mike is a legit pro bowler by 1963 ([07:01]).

• Failed Musical Start

  • Bowled and drummed, but couldn’t break through either.
  • Drafted to Vietnam; claimed to be a world-class singer (without having sung before) ([09:21]-[09:41]), but actually had a passable crooner's voice ([10:00]).

• Post-War Hustle

  • Returned to the U.S.—wrong era for crooners (“everybody was into noise… I couldn’t get arrested that first year” [12:46]).
  • Took odd jobs that included egg distribution, gas stations, laundromats, and construction ([13:53]-[15:16]).

• Desperate for Stardom

  • Managers suggested name change; became "Johnny Baron" briefly ([15:55]-[16:05]).
  • Did Tonight Show, sent literal boxes of lemon jello to DJs so they’d remember/pronounce his name ([18:39]-[18:57]).

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2. Infomercial Innovation & Mood Rock

• Breakthrough via TV Ads

  • Inspired by Crazy Eddie-style blitz marketing ([22:09]-[23:16]).
  • Raised $250,000 from local investors (Midas muffler owner, etc.) to fund album Love ‘76 and a massive local NYC ad buy ([24:28]-[27:35]).
  • Literally invents the album infomercial—six channels, 100x per week ([27:40]-[28:07]).

• Infomercial Quote:

  “I figured even if the album doesn’t sell, everyone will find out who I am and I’ll get work.”
  — Peter Lemongello ([23:48])

• Song Style:

  • Music described as “mood rock,” which the hosts call “hotel lobby-level crooning” ([29:36]-[29:47]).
  • The LP Love ‘76 sells 53,000 records—not insignificant, but not enough to pivot to national fame ([33:54]).

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3. Personal Life & Fizzling Out

• Collapse & Bankruptcy

  • Label folds, singles flop, backers unpaid, declares bankruptcy, moves to Florida ([56:09]-[56:17]).
  • Shuffles through construction, small club gigs, and a notorious tendency to keep performing despite disaster ([76:55]-[77:12]).

• Infamous Antics

  • Ordered to pay damages after failing to finish houses; engaged in arson-for-hire; did jail time for fraud ([74:01]-[76:55]).
  • Stubborn persistence: still singing into the 1990s and beyond, even after suicide attempts and continued financial/legal wreckage ([79:15]-[82:56]).
  • Son, Peter Lemongello Jr., also tries the crooning path, appearing on American Idol ([81:15]-[81:26]).

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4. Mark Lemongello: Ballplayer on the Brink

• Fiery Temperament

  • Famed in his minor league days for unchecked emotional outbursts: destroying stereos, punching through windshields, throwing food at servers, and (allegedly) eating his hat ([44:51]-[48:00]).
  • Extreme reactions, especially related to his dying younger brother, Thomas ([46:05]-[46:50]).

• Major League Talent, Minor League Judgement

  • Flashes of major league success: 3-1 with a 2.79 ERA in his MLB debut season ([54:37]).
  • Notorious for clubroom destruction, sleeping with head in bowls of mayonnaise, and double-birding umpires ([58:02]-[59:51]).
  • Traded after continuous behavioral meltdowns, culminating with throwing a baseball at his manager after getting pulled from a game ([66:18]).

• Quote:

  “I occasionally went bananas, but I was always fined and always paid Banana Jello.”
  — Mark Lemongello ([65:59])

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5. The Lemongello Family Collapse

• Business Ventures & Violent Unraveling:

  • The Lemongello relatives attempt a homebuilding business in Florida, dragging in former baseball players and associates ([68:08]-[69:01]).
  • A petty dispute escalates into armed kidnapping, forced withdrawal of $50,000, arson, more lawsuits, and ultimate probation ([72:03]-[75:11]).
  • Legal leniency shocks the hosts: “This judge was just like, look, boys will be boys. This is crazy. But yeah, you guys seem pretty upset” ([75:09]-[75:32]).

• Aftermath

  • Peter continues to scrape by on regional nostalgia for his “mood rock” days ([80:40]-[80:50]).
  • Mark vanishes from public life. Mike—original brother, the most stable—makes the PBA Hall of Fame ([80:34]).

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

Humor, Tragedy, and the Bizarre

• [16:54]
  Gareth: “I really am rarely on the side of ‘change the name,’ but if your last name is Lemongello…”

• [32:24]
  Peter (as quoted by Dave): “Look, what this country needs is a white male superstar they can hang their ass on.”

• [51:00]
  Dave: “He told Frank not to walk on his floors.”
  Gareth: “Well, that’s gonna be pretty hard... What do you want me to do, buddy? I live here.”

• [58:28]
  Gareth: “I didn’t know you can take it to the guy’s stuff… You can’t take it to the guy’s stuff.”
  Dave: “No, you can’t. And Mark is asleep… His head was in a bowl of mayonnaise.”

• [74:01] Dave: “Now Mark let the cops know Peter had committed crimes. So now he’s like, he just kidnapped them, stole money, and now he’s like, that guy’s the bad guy?”

• [85:16]
  Gareth: “It’s clear that kid did not become that on his own. That was a construct.”

---

Key Timestamps

| Timestamp | Segment / Theme | |-----------|-----------------------------------------------------| | 05:09 | Peter Lemongello’s early family history | | 10:00 | Discovers latent singing talent in Vietnam | | 13:53 | Quirky post-war job trajectory (eggs, laundromats) | | 22:09 | Infomercial inspiration | | 27:40 | Ad blitz for Love ‘76 | | 33:54 | Initial record sales and career stall | | 44:51 | Introduction to Mark Lemongello | | 48:00 | Mark’s notorious temperament & hat-eating incident | | 58:28 | Infamous 'mayonnaise nap' in the Astros clubhouse | | 66:18 | Throws baseball at manager, end of MLB hope | | 68:08 | Lemongello’s construction business in Florida | | 72:03 | Armed kidnapping, forced van ride, $50,000 theft | | 74:01 | Arson, bribery, lenient sentences | | 80:34 | Mike’s PBA Hall of Fame induction | | 81:15 | Peter Lemongello Jr. on American Idol | | 85:16 | Hosts reflect on generational legacies |

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The Dollop’s Signature Tone

This episode is classic Dollop: part absurdist comedy, part tragedy, with a brisk, irreverent, and performative banter. Verbally riffing, the hosts read direct quotes, act out incidents, and pile on biting asides—e.g., for every moment of crooner drama, there’s a recurring mayonnaise or egg bit, song parodies (“It turned into a great song!” - [11:20]) and imagined dialogue (“Let Mark sleep—he’s tucking himself out”—[58:45]).

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Final Thoughts / Summary

This is an account of American striving from the off-ramp—where talent, delusion, and timing crash together. The Lemongello story moves from infomercial inventiveness and the edge of legitimate stardom to Florida arson and family in-fighting, with plenty of comic byways: mayonnaise naps, mood rock, and failed attempts to “be what the country needs.” The ghosts of show business and baseball haunt every beat, and the episode closes with a mix of empathy and satirical bewilderment at this uniquely American tale of loud dreams and quiet ruin.

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Useful for:

• Anyone interested in the stranger side of American pop history
• Listeners fascinated by the intersection of celebrity, oddball marketing, and crime
• Fans of tragicomic family stories and ‘where are they now’ tales

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Sources:
Asbury Park Press, Pittsburgh Press, Calgary Herald, Tampa Bay Times, New York Times, Toronto Sun, Palm Beach Post, Time Magazine, The Tonight Show ([86:14]).

Transcript

[A]

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[B]

Talking about a third.

[A]

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[B]

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[A]

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[A]

It screamed.

[B]

It did not scream. And it just kind of unfurls itself. A lot of liquids itself. There's no app.

[A]

Liquids all over the wall.

[B]

No tell.

[A]

I'm thinking about a bird.

[B]

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[A]

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[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

My father's dead. You killed him.

[B]

They think that I'm shiny.

[A]

I am a pie man.

[B]

I'm Pete Rose and I only go to Gold's Gym. This one specifically.

[A]

Rumor is that his penis is broken.

[B]

And show up where the taco bar was.

[A]

His brain just exploded.

[B]

River of cheese. You've been drinking any gnome juice?

[A]

No, officer. My dad had a fart chair.

[B]

Hey, cover me.

[A]

You're listening to the Dollop on the All Things Comedy Network. This is an American history podcast where each week I, Dave Anthony, read a story from American history to a goober. Apologize. No.

[B]

Apologize or I'm on strike and I'm not doing the intro.

[A]

Okay, then no one knows who you are, so that's fine.

[B]

All right, look, I'm sorry. All right, thank you, Gareth Reynolds, who has no idea what the topic is. Going to be about Absolutely not.

[A]

How I'm sorry's work.

[B]

Well, when you said it, I appreciated it, so I moved on.

[A]

Will the United States apologize to Iran?

[B]

I. I don't even want to try to get into what that comparison could possibly look like in any other context other than Israel.

[A]

Apologize to Lebanon.

[B]

Other than. Can you. Oh, my God, man, just.

[A]

We've heard about the chimsies. Chimpanzee civil war in Africa.

[B]

I'm on the side of the chimpanzees.

[A]

Well, it's a civil war. Sounds like it's over.

[B]

Not the way they're doing it.

[A]

Sounds like it's over, though. One, one, one, one.

[B]

Now, what would you. What would you label that group as? The United States group or the Iran group?

[A]

The Bests Ass Kickers.

[B]

You know, weird it is to live in the country where you're like, there's

[A]

never been a war in this country where so many people are like, God, I hope the other guy wins, man.

[B]

It's like, imagine being in the head of like. I don't. I only say Rocky because of the shorts that are Americanly themed. But to be in Rocky's brain and be like, yo, I hope I lose.

[A]

I mean, the Lego Video.

[B]

Lego Videos is the only AI that's working.

[A]

It's. And they are the.

[B]

The only AI that I'm okay with.

[A]

The last one was unreal.

[B]

Amazing. They're putting out one a day.

[A]

It's crazy.

[B]

It takes longer to make actual Legos.

[A]

February 11, 1947. Now, this episode we did live, so we never put it out, so why not?

[B]

Audio.

[A]

Yeah, we don't have the audio.

[B]

Where was it?

[A]

Where did we do it?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I don't know. We did. Is it.

[B]

What?

[A]

In Studio one. I don't know what that was. That thing.

[B]

What's the funniest way to say it during COVID

[A]

Hey, you're still during COVID by the way. It's just that the beginning ended.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You're in the middle.

[B]

You know the. The title of David Cross's new special.

[A]

Oh, I forgot what it is.

[B]

It's the. Oh, my God, it's. It's so good.

[A]

It's the beginning of the end.

[B]

It's the end of the beginning of the end. The end of the beginning of the end.

[A]

Yeah, right. Peter Lemon Jello was born in New Jersey.

[B]

Peter Lemon Jello. Yeah, I'm sure I had fun with that the first time, too. That's shocked. Lemon Jello.

[A]

Lemon Jello.

[B]

I spell that.

[A]

L, E M O N, G E. L L O.

[B]

So maybe lemon gallo.

[A]

Not the. Not that I've seen the way it's pronounced.

[B]

I'm very happy that we don't say lemon gallo. No, no, no. We will be saying lemon cello.

[A]

From what I. It was lemon jello.

[B]

We will be saying Lemon Jello was

[A]

born in New Jersey City, New Jersey. His parents often played the albums of crooners like Frank Sinatra and Jerry Vale, who you love.

[B]

Love very Vale. Oh, was this a. Like a virtual one? We did?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

He was born very good looking and was into music and played drums in a band growing up.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

So that's a catch.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. Least ego in the group.

[A]

He does not like school.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

He believed teachers thought too much of themselves.

[B]

I. When I was in school, I had the same POV quote.

[A]

They wore eight dollar jewelry. I knew there had to be something better than that.

[B]

Now I don't relate. At no point was I like, she's cheap.

[A]

Did you not gauge your teachers on the quality of jewelry?

[B]

No, it was on the ability. Like how they would deal with my problematic behavior is how I judge them.

[A]

You were a problem.

[B]

Major.

[A]

Terrible. He watched his older brother Mike bowl at Sunset Lanes.

[B]

So a bowl of lemon jello.

[A]

Now you apologize.

[B]

No.

[A]

Peter made money betting on him.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Mike became a Pro bowler in 1963.

[B]

Yeah. By the way, that almost means you're an athlete.

[A]

By 1965, he was making top five. Top five finishes. Wow. So he's legit.

[B]

Hell yeah.

[A]

Fucking around.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Peter was on, you know, when the

[B]

bowlers union went on strike. It was a very confusing day. It's a fine joke. It's not a killer. It's a little fun. And I think that's what I like about it. It's a little fun. It's a Namu's bush. It's a little snack before the meal. It's like a spoonful of lemon pudding.

[A]

It's a bubble gum wrapper joke. Yep. You can apologize now. No. You owe us to apologies.

[B]

I don't know, buddy. You're the one. You call me a goober for no reason. But you started this. Goober's not a compliment. Shut up. I don't even need you. All I need is this is what the show will be. You'll pass away and I'll go through the old iPad and I'll go, I did that. He'd say this because he's a real piece of shit. And I tell him, that was a good pun. I miss him.

[A]

The. The last. So the last 800 episodes will be Gareth. Retorts.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah, I should have said that.

[A]

That's fine.

[B]

Yeah. Somebody likes my British accent, and it's me. All right. British accent. We're sponsored by Future Jeans. Future Jeans is so. They're so good, you can't rip them.

[A]

Okay, so. So Mike's a pro bowler. Peter joins the high school bowling team. But his coach said, quote, Petey wasn't as disciplined. He didn't like rules.

[B]

This sounds like it's very non dis.

[A]

You gotta. You gotta. You gotta to bowl.

[B]

Yeah. Bowling is a very. It's a simple, ruled game, but there are rules.

[A]

Yeah. He wanted a music career, and he was in a band after graduating, but he's just not a good drummer. Okay, so he became a barber and married in 1966. But then he gets drafted and he gets sent to Vietnam.

[B]

For those of you new to the show, the draft is what's going to happen this fall.

[A]

Well, they're not even. Yeah, they're not. You don't have to register anywhere. They're just gonna do it automatically, which is good. Which.

[B]

That's better.

[A]

So we've already talked about which country he'll go to. He told his officers he was a singer, the best singer. So in the Army.

[B]

And he's like, unfortunately, I can't serve. I'm an unbelievable singer. I've got a beautiful voice. They call me the Porcelain Throat.

[A]

Now, here's the problem with that. He had never sung before.

[B]

Oh, okay, great. Can we hear something? I've never done a tune before. Wait, what? I've never sang a song, but I have one of the most unbelievable voices you're ever gonna hear.

[A]

So he gets transferred to Special Services, worked, and pretty soon he's doing USO shows.

[B]

Wow. So he did have a voice.

[A]

Turns out he could sing.

[B]

Wow. So he knew he'd sung a little bit.

[A]

He probably was singing around the house.

[B]

Yeah. Right. So I don't care for your rules when we're bowling down the lane. That's just the way that authority works in my brain. You can take your rules and stick them up your big, weird ass. That's the kind of guy who likes to stuff at last. Oh, baby, baby, will you be mine? Oh, my God. Oh, oh, baby, baby will you answer the line? Oh, pick up the phone and say, hello, it is me, Peter Lemon. Jello.

[A]

That's a. That's a sign you ran out of gas when you.

[B]

No, that's the guy. That's the other guy.

[A]

The backup guy.

[B]

Yeah, there's always. Then Sean on Well, there would be the guy who'd come in and go,

[A]

That's fair.

[B]

Oh, there's that.

[A]

I guess I just didn't expect it to become a love song because it was a.

[B]

Well, yeah, but it. It turned into a great song. You get upset, but it turned into a great song. That was like watching Paul McCartney in the Beatles documentary, Goodbye. Right? Get back. You got to see the start.

[A]

I can't. I just. It's.

[B]

Come on, lighten up, kid. Come on.

[A]

At least we agree that I'm John Lennon. Although I was driving over here and I was like, God, John was a real piece of.

[B]

You want to be George?

[A]

Yeah. You want to be George or Ringo?

[B]

You want to be George?

[A]

So says he's the best singer, gets put in USO shows, and he can sing. After one show, Martha Ray told Peter she tried to be a singer when the war was over. Years later, Peter would tell this exact same story, but it was Don Ho who happened to say it in Hawaii. So maybe not true. Maybe not true.

[B]

No problem.

[A]

Maybe not true.

[B]

I don't know enough about Don Ho. He was a weird little Hawaiian figure.

[A]

Yeah, he's not weird. He's just a great Hawaiian singer.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I don't know why I went to weird. All right. Really?

[B]

All right. Let's all calm down. Come on now.

[A]

Tiny Bubbles.

[B]

What's that?

[A]

That's his song, Tiny Bubbles. That's his famous.

[B]

Yeah. What a legend.

[A]

You know, we're not talking shit about Don Ho on this podcast.

[B]

Keep reading, loser.

[A]

When the. Jesus Christ. So the war ends, Peter has a tough time. Peter likes classic singers, like Sinatra and Nat King Cole. But, quote, everybody was into noise. I couldn't get arrested that first year.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

He had some gigs. He needed a job. But he has to set his own schedule so he can do entertainment when

[B]

he's doing this, like, what year are we in? Like, the 60s.

[A]

It's. Yeah, it's like. Okay, late. Late 60s, early.

[B]

Okay. Right. So Summer of Love times. And he's trying to do, like, a

[A]

little after that, I think, maybe 70.

[B]

He's trying to do Sinatra stuff, right?

[A]

Yeah. It's not the time.

[B]

Right. Yeah. Read the room.

[A]

I mean, rock and roll's just been embedded, like.

[B]

Yeah, right.

[A]

Yeah. He has some gigs. He needs a job, but has to set his own schedule, so he starts selling eggs. What do you mean?

[B]

What do you mean?

[A]

He became an egg distributor.

[B]

What?

[A]

How?

[B]

What?

[A]

He distributes eggs.

[B]

That's what hens do. What is he doing?

[A]

No, hens lay them. He would be the guy who would take the eggs and distribute them to the stores.

[B]

So he's.

[A]

He's an egg seller.

[B]

That's what, you know, he's not doing.

[A]

Eating the profit. I guarantee you, much like a drug dealer, he is not dipping into his supply. He is even saying that he's selling.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

They all make it to market Reynolds.

[B]

Okay, good for them. Because I'll tell you, there's a lot of egg distributors who shave a little off the top.

[A]

No, there are not.

[B]

Yeah, there are. 100%. Yeah. Take a little peel off the shell.

[A]

Oh, yes, you do, sir.

[B]

Yes, you do.

[A]

It's not normal behavior. Don't. Are you taking out an egg right now? What are you doing? Are you gonna eat a egg? God, you're a creepy weirdo. Like, how do you just have an egg sitting by in a Tupperware thing? This is insanity. Hmm.

[B]

I'd like to kiss the hen's ass with these.

[A]

Okay, so he makes some money, as in that. Do you want us to wait for you to finish the.

[B]

You can be waiting a long time.

[A]

We just lost all our hearing. People are. Have acute hearing, and they're like babies.

[B]

Have a cute hearing.

[A]

So he makes some money from that. Then he starts buying gas stations, and then he starts buying laundry mats.

[B]

Well, why don't you just say the regular trajectory? And then he.

[A]

He gets into construction and building houses.

[B]

Yeah. So, yeah, for those of you who maybe live in countries that aren't America. This land is great, and it starts with eggs. Gas stations, laundromats, complexes.

[A]

Very common.

[B]

Yeah. It's a normal thing. Soon he'll be doing blimps.

[A]

But during all this, he wants to

[B]

be a star, right? Right.

[A]

He goes through different managers. One said he should change his name, saying he needed something that really snaps, like Bobby Darren.

[B]

Yeah, right. Yeah. Lemon jello is weird.

[A]

So for a bit, he became Johnny Baron. Hey, hey, I'm Johnny.

[B]

My balls don't work. I'm Johnny Baron.

[A]

Johnny Baron. That's not a good pick.

[B]

Johnny Baron. Well, there's the whole thing with. I. I mean, I just remember this from watching, like, a Behind the Music, but when John Mellencamp. That was his name. The guy for the label was like, Johnny Cougar.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

And he was like Johnny Cougar for a while, and then he was like John Cougar Mellencamp.

[A]

I think it's. I think after his first album, he switched away.

[B]

Well, then he. So he went, john, Johnny Cougar. John Cougar Mellencamp. Because he was like, it's still me. And then he was like, eventually, he's like, John Mellon. This weird guy made up Cougar. That guy's like, you regret it. Cougar is a dangerous animal. It's a rock and roll cat, baby.

[A]

So makes no difference. Nobody's interested. He goes back to Peter Lemon Jello. I can't let this go.

[B]

Lemon. By the way, I would. I really am rarely on the side of. Change the name. But if your last name is Lemon Jello.

[A]

But it's memorable.

[B]

Yeah, but it's like something that they serve on a cruise. It's definitely not, like, the kind of vibe you want.

[A]

Oh, I would have no problem with lemon jello.

[B]

The food or the singer?

[A]

The food.

[B]

Right. So you're not. See that You've already done the thing. You just did the thing I was talking about.

[A]

Lemon is a fine flavor of jello,

[B]

but I'm talking about a guy's last name. You remember we were talking about a guy. Before you start.

[A]

I remember him. You know why? It reminds me of that sweet taste of lemon jello that I had on the cruise.

[B]

Okay, let's get.

[A]

Great boat, by the way.

[B]

The lemon Jello.

[A]

No, the cruise.

[B]

Okay, we're good. We're ready to go.

[A]

In 1971, Mike had won the PBA Bowling Championship. So Mike's no joke.

[B]

Yeah, Mike's real.

[A]

And Peter finally gets his break and is on the Tonight Show.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

And it goes well first.

[B]

So he. There was some successes, obviously.

[A]

A little bit. Yeah. I don't know. I. I really, like.

[B]

I can't get on the Tonight Show. I mean, it's not. It's not easy.

[A]

I don't know. Do you want to anymore?

[B]

I mean, I would love to put on huge boxing gloves and hit the host during trivia like Carson used to do.

[A]

Yeah, no, I. Yeah, he called the show's producer three days later and was like, hey, when can I do it again?

[B]

Okay. And that's producer was like, we got a whole thing which takes a couple of years. Yes.

[A]

Yeah. Producer quote. Look, kid, a lot of people are good. What do you say? What do we say about you this time? Let's make him feel at home because this is his second time on national tv.

[B]

Sounds good.

[A]

Yeah, that's perfect. Things aren't going well with he and his wife, and they split up for years. He sent boxes of lemon jello to DJs so they know how to pronounce his name when he got big. What's up, Reynolds? Yeah, I told you. I just said it.

[B]

Works. I'm trying to think if

[A]

it's good.

[B]

I think it is good. I agree. I think it's good.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know who I saw the other day? I did a quick. I did a 10 minute spot on Heidi and Frank and I saw our old friend Heidi. Oh, yeah.

[A]

How's Heidi doing?

[B]

She's good. She was in La Quinta, which is a town. I guess. I thought it was just a hotel.

[A]

No, it's a town. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

She's got a lot of dogs.

[B]

A lot of dogs. Yeah, she's got a lot of dogs.

[A]

So Peter wants a big manager, and he targets Don Rickles manager, Joe Scandori.

[B]

Interesting.

[A]

And Joe finally gives in after being harassed and signs him. And pretty soon Peter's opening for Rickles and he takes off. That's how it works.

[B]

Yeah. I've opened for musicians. It's weird.

[A]

He does three more Tonight shows. He does the Mike Douglas show, the Merv Griffin show, William Morris signs him. He gets a big contract now to make three singles for Epic Records.

[B]

So this is a strange. It's worked.

[A]

It's not. It's not actually that strange. This was a time when you would like, hey, I got a new hot kid. Let him on. And they like.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Now it's different. Now you have to have a big hit to get on the Tonight Show.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Where then they would kind of make you a little bit.

[B]

Like right there.

[A]

Was that.

[B]

Yeah. Yep.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. They wanted to break talent as well, so.

[A]

So he's gonna make three.

[B]

Yeah. This next guy, he's so crazy. He's like. His name. His last name is lemon Jello. So we're gonna wrestle in lemon Jello and I'm gonna beat him with boxing gloves.

[A]

God, it's just. What has happened to that show is like a national disgrace. But it's. It also follows the trajectory of America. So it's fine. Well, you should have a total drunk guy doing the Tonight Show. The first.

[B]

I mean, they did earlier too. They just took a break.

[A]

So the first single was released in December 1973. And it bombs and then Epic drops it. And then his manager, DRO drops him. Quote, I knew I'd never be broke because I was good.

[B]

Because he's Jello.

[A]

I was good at things like selling eggs.

[B]

Isn't it strange how so much of joy, economy, perspective, resilience is based around eggs? It just keeps. It always comes back to eggs.

[A]

It's actually not interesting.

[B]

It's fascinating.

[A]

But I was frustrated because I wanted to be a star. I struck out Doing things everybody else's way. Wearing their clothes, singing their songs. This time I was gonna be me.

[B]

That's it.

[A]

So they created his Persona and everything else, and he didn't like it. So he's got. If I'm true to myself.

[B]

Wait, other people did it? So now he's gonna do it. Right?

[A]

Now he's gonna do it.

[B]

I'm gonna wear a box of Jello and my head's gonna poke out of the O.

[A]

One day he's watching TV and he sees a commercial for Crazy Eddie, which is an electronic store, I think, in New York. He decides to buy ad time to sell an album.

[B]

Now, why don't you explain who Crazy Eddie was to people?

[A]

Well, he did ads. Are you gonna look it up? Yeah, he did ads. I think it's New York, right? And it's just the ads are just like boisterous, insane. I'm sure you can find one ads that are. They. They take everyone's attention because no one has ever seen anything like it. Sony, Betamax or a TV video game. Get it now? Because Crazy Eddie can't be beat with prices solo. He's practically giving it all away. Shop around, get the best prices you can find, then go to Crazy Eddie. And Crazy Eddie will beat him. Remember, Crazy Eddie guarantees you the largest selection professionally staffed service centers and the guaranteed lowest prices. Crazy Eddie, his prices are insane.

[B]

Kind of was like a. The start of something.

[A]

It was the start of something like that was kind of like the first guy doing that.

[B]

Yeah, it was. It was like. It was. It was advertising started to get a little nuts. Yeah, but it was just a small electronics store.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, right. But. But it made a huge splash in that.

[B]

Okay, so his assuming. Were they national?

[A]

No, this is.

[B]

So his idea is in New York. It's new buy time on New York commercials.

[A]

Correct.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Quote, I figured even if the album doesn't sell, everyone will find out who I am and I'll get work.

[B]

I mean, effective today. Today, an effective strategy.

[A]

Right? It's like modern. How it worked, modern day. Like how you do it. A fan. Bob Pachuzzi.

[B]

Hello.

[A]

Was in banking and couldn't understand how Peter was not a star.

[B]

As far as I'm not Patchuzzi, but I am Pachuzzi. And when I choose, I like Peter Lemon. Jello.

[A]

Kid, I don't get it. You got the voice, I'm a little

[B]

weirdo, and I love you.

[A]

Peter said he needed a quarter million dollars.

[B]

Exactly. In order to make an album, you need a quarter of a million in 1981 without 73. 73 without question.

[A]

50,000 to record the album.

[B]

Bingo.

[A]

200,000 to buy ad airtime on TV.

[B]

And that's it.

[A]

And that.

[B]

And enough for a Coke to celebrate.

[A]

And of course, no one's ever done that. So it's, you know, thinking outside the box. Who knows? Pachuzi was in, but he. He wants to bring in other investors. He doesn't want to do it all himself. So they rent the Westbury Music Fair and had Peter Singh for rich investors.

[B]

Interesting.

[A]

So he puts on a live show.

[B]

I like the idea.

[A]

That's not. That's.

[B]

That was how it was. That's how it used to be.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You'd be like, get people to your show.

[A]

It costs 32,000 to put the show on.

[B]

That's. They spent too much. They 100% spent too much money.

[A]

Too much.

[B]

That's crazy.

[A]

And yet it works. Seven dudes put in $10,000 each, including a Midas muffler shop owner I like,

[B]

I listen, I know good sounds. And he's got it.

[A]

Yeah. Lemon Jello Enterprises Ltd. Is formed.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Peter owns 65% and the investors, 35.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

That's crazy. That's, like, great numbers. He hires a songwriter, he hires musicians, and he makes an album.

[B]

It's very funny that with all that, he can't write songs.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Seems like a big part of this talent.

[A]

No, but I don't know back then and it's still today that, like, some people don't write any songs, they just sing them.

[B]

Yeah, but it's like, I guess. Yeah, I guess.

[A]

The album was called Love 76 because

[B]

of the year 76.

[A]

Peter thought everyone wanted love songs because the pill was now easily available.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

And people were delaying having kids.

[B]

I mean, look, I don't know what it was like when the pill got out, but it was probably a pretty big fucking deal. Yeah.

[A]

I mean, I remember it. I was a child, but I must have been great. Really started going at it. I couldn't even have kids at that point, but.

[B]

Hey, hey, hey.

[A]

What?

[B]

I'm talking to our editor. Cut this

[A]

quote. Most people are ducking, having babies. They're into themselves and babies are a hassle. These people want to hear love songs.

[B]

Sounds like something a weirdo at the end of the bar would say, like, kind of to nobody, hoping someone picks up on it.

[A]

So he plays the album for a friend, and she calls it mood rock, which he loves, and he uses it. He made a TV commercial. He asked the backers for another 10,000 each for the commercial? Yeah. He bought 140,000 of airtime in New York.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

$140,000 back then is a lot of money.

[B]

Crazy.

[A]

So it's an ad blitz. That's a shitload, huh? Six channels starting on January 1, 1976, up to a hundred times a week until May. Wow, that's a lot of.

[B]

Well, and I mean, this is. The six channels were all the channels.

[A]

That's it? Yeah, that's all there was.

[B]

Hundred times a day or a week.

[A]

I pulled, quote, I pulled an end run. He was basically inventing infomercials.

[B]

Yeah, right.

[A]

Essentially. Because, I mean, I guess maybe what's his name did it. Well, you kind of remember the oh ads.

[B]

You kind of remember those types of commercials where it was like, everybody's talking about Peter Lemon Jello, the crooner with the voice of gold with songs like I need your love all the time.

[A]

Peter Lemon Jello.

[B]

Oh, I could have been a million things.

[A]

Peter Lemon Jello. A mood rock experience called Love 76. Yes. Peter Lemon Jello has created a new kind of music that's both romantic and moving. Just listen.

[B]

Come close, baby. It's called Lemon Jello, 586-7700.

[A]

That's 586-7700. Or save COD charges and send 698 for records or 898 for eight track tape to Love 76, Box R7, Gracie Station, New York, NY 128.

[B]

Lemon Jello. So if someone handed you a bowl of it, you'd pass.

[A]

It's bad.

[B]

It's bad. It also is. The music is terrible.

[A]

But his voice is not. Like, there's not. It's the kind of guy you'd hear on like a. Like a. Like.

[B]

Yeah, at a. It's very. So.

[A]

So, yeah.

[B]

It's like you'd walk into a hotel and be like, oh, we should probably get out of here.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

It also reminds you how hard it was to get shit.

[A]

Absolutely.

[B]

Just used to be you had to Mailing. Mailing a check and then waiting.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

For something to come to you or

[A]

you call the number. But I don't know how it worked with call the number because there weren't really credit cards at this point. So I don't know, it's probably just

[B]

people who are, like, there to answer questions.

[A]

It's probably just an answering machine. And then he calls them back.

[B]

Hello, Lemon Jello Industries. Yeah, I just saw this Love 76 album. O.

[A]

Okay, I want to get the eight track.

[B]

Okay. Yeah. Well, all you have to do is send a self addressed stamped envelope back to the P.O. box that was on the commercial. And then you put a check in there and then we'll take that check, we'll cash that check and once that check clears, we'll get you an eight track or an album. We'll put that in the. With the postage that you send and then we'll send that your way. And that should take about two to nine weeks and it'll be worth it.

[A]

So the album sells. Girls are falling for his good looks.

[B]

Is he good looking?

[A]

I mean, I mean in not a amazing way. Like, I mean he looks like. He looks cheesy, weirdo. Ish. A little bit. I don't know for the time.

[B]

I guess he's very middle.

[A]

Yeah, right.

[B]

I mean, as a matter of fact. No.

[A]

You're gonna say no?

[B]

I'm gonna say no. Yeah, he looks like, like Adam west, but like, like an uglier Adam.

[A]

That's right. That's right. One Brooklyn girl was staying up until 4:30am to watch his ad every night. One girl kissed the TV screen whenever he came on. The New York Times interviewed Peter in his house and said all the rooms were color coordinated like a furniture showroom.

[B]

That's super, man. He. He really is a weirdo. He looks like a. Like a Neil diamond impersonator.

[A]

Yeah. There were plastic flowers and wood. Yeah, and wood looking plastic panels. The Times quote, there is little to suggest beyond the cigarette butts in the ashtray that anyone has lived here recently. It is as homey, as hollow as a holiday in meeting room. Okay, so Peter loved. Sorry. Peter believed everyone would fall in love with his voice if they heard it. That's all he needed was hear it. And they'd be like, this is the guy. Quote, look, what this country needs is a white male superstar. They can hang their ass.

[B]

Who is saying this? Who is saying this, please?

[A]

It's Peter.

[B]

Peter is saying that.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Oh my God.

[A]

Himself.

[B]

The.

[A]

He knows what America wants.

[B]

Where it's time for a white guy to succeed.

[A]

Where in the 70s can you fight a white guy?

[B]

We need to find whites. This country has been taken over by native Americans and black people for long enough. It's time for a white man to get a shot. That's why this new song give whitey a hit.

[A]

They want him clean and they want him now. That's why I'm playing it this way.

[B]

They want a clean, nice white man.

[A]

I can be what they want. I can fill that void.

[B]

I can. Listen, listen, listen, listen. If you're a black person and you're watching this television. Turn it off right now. I'm talking to my white. I just want to let you know it's time. I may have lemon jello in the name, but you're not going to find anything that's not pure white over here. Three, two, one. White. So let's be

[A]

his old manager, Joe Scandori returns because he's making money.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

Rumors were Peter had $500,000 of live gigs lined up and that he was backed by the mob. If I saw that, I'd be like, this guy's totally mob connected.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

He expanded TV ads to Vegas and Los Angeles.

[B]

Vegas is going to love him. Yeah, he's perfect. He looks like a Vegas casino came to Life.

[A]

He sold 53,000 records and signed a four year recording deal with private stock records worth 250,000 if options were picked up every year.

[B]

And what was the upfront cost he got from the other people? It was like 250 anyway.

[A]

Yeah, I mean, he, he asked for 250, but then another 10,000 each. So like three something.

[B]

So he's close to profit. I mean, it's working. You're saying it's working? Basically.

[A]

Well, yeah. We don't know how much money he made, but he did sell, I mean, 50,000 records. He probably made a lot of money.

[B]

Yeah, right.

[A]

Quote, now the public wants to see what they bought. Now I have to go to establishment again. Now I have to go establishment again. So he's got to go. He's got to go back the. The traditional way.

[B]

Yeah. I love the idea that he's like, you got to go establishment. Look, I bought a hundred commercials a week. Now I got to go the traditional route.

[A]

He was on more Tonight shows. He was on the Today show. So this is all his manager Getting.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

60 Minutes. I don't know why Chevy Chase mocked him on Saturday Night Live as Peter Lemon. Mood ring. Ha ha ha. That's some. You might me mood ring.

[B]

That'd be like orange jello or something. Like, I'd go that route. Jello's funnier than like mood ring.

[A]

Some didn't think much of it. A promoter quote, could he deliver in Cleveland and Chicago where he didn't buy ad time?

[B]

No, no, I can't.

[A]

Joe was planning albums and concerts and more tv, but there was no tour because Peter was indeed not a draw. Why would anybody know about him outside of the cities? He's not running out. This is not.

[B]

He's got two markets and he's also

[A]

Like a fucking crooner, when that's not a thing anymore.

[B]

Yeah, but it's all. Thing is, you cannot run local. I mean, this is what politicians do. You cannot run local spots in two markets that you'll succeed in and be like, all right, let's see what my Midwest numbers are like. Yeah, well, they're terrible.

[A]

I guess he's thinking because he's on the Tonight show and everything else, that it would expand it. But he's not good.

[B]

No, he's like a Ponzi scheme to be.

[A]

To be. So you're talking about, like, we're on the verge of disco rock, like folk. There's all these, like, genres that are taking off and. And then to be a crooner at that time, period. So to go against the. The norm, you got to be really good.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You can't just be like, yeah, a shitty.

[B]

Yeah, right.

[A]

Yeah. So.

[B]

But remember, Dave, there's a lot of people who need a white man. I mean, it's the 70s in the United States.

[A]

Gareth the Dollop is brought to you by him.

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Yeah, that's exactly right.

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[B]

Oh, Dave.

[A]

Yes. This is my wheelhouse right here, Pesty. Our wheelhouse is very safe if directed. It is. Look, if you got bugs, this is what we're talking about. You got a bug situation, by the way.

[B]

You do?

[A]

I did.

[B]

We all do.

[A]

Well, I Did. I did have a bug situation, particularly. We, you know, we have a converted garage and that's where young Finnegan sleeps.

[B]

That's where Finn and I hang out.

[A]

And he was like, there's a spider. There's a spider situation there. And he got a couple spider bites. Not great. I noticed a brown widow. And so I was like, it's spray time. Right. Then coincidentally, we got this message and they're like, hey, do you want to work with this, Pesty? And I was like, I was literally just going online to look for. So I did want to pay someone to come and do it. And Pesty sends it to you. It's easy to do. There's like a. There's like a little pouch you mix some water in. Then you just put a pump in the pouch bag and then it gives you instructions on how to spray outside and spray inside if you need to. And I did. And they're gone.

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And it was so easy.

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It is.

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You know, it's like we always say over here, let Pesty be your bestie.

[A]

He has a cousin, Mark Lemon, Jello me, eight years younger.

[B]

Mark's an Andy Gibb.

[A]

He's an athlete.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

He doesn't like to lose. He's very competitive. When he was 10, he smashed his baseball cleat through his family rec room ceiling after losing.

[B]

Yeah, well, I mean, it is the rec room.

[A]

Yeah. That's how you do it. He was a star in his High school baseball and football teams. After one loss, he destroyed his 500 stereo.

[B]

So he's a cool guy.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

He's like a fine guy.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

There's no flags, no flex.

[A]

Friend and baseball player Frank McCormick, quote, you can go up to him on the street and insult his parents and he'll walk away. But if a little thing happens on the mound, he'll go crazy.

[B]

It's a weird. Like a side to that. Hey, yo, your mom's weird, your dad's ugly. Doesn't bother me.

[A]

Mark was quiet and kept to himself. Oh, good. A quiet, angry guy.

[B]

Yeah, that's the right kind of.

[A]

He was close with his younger brother Thomas, who was six years younger. And Thomas idolizes Mark. A week before turning 18, Mark. Frank McCormick and Mark Bird Fidrich get walk on tryouts with the Detroit Tigers. And they all get signed. But when he leaves to play in the minors, Thomas gives him a silver dollar. So I don't know why I said. But when he. Please. When he leaves to play in the minors, Thomas gives him a silver dollar for good luck.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And Mark keeps the silver dollar in his glove. Okay. Early in 1975, Thomas was diagnosed with bone cancer at 13.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And it hits Mark hard. His parents said he had temper tantrums and became even more intense. He's already having temper tantrums. His anger is now constantly flaring. He shattered a Coke machine after a game. He destroyed the team clubhouse on one occasion. Mark Bird and Frank were roommates. And Frank, quote, Frank said, quote, I had to hold him down on the bed in the hotel room so he wouldn't tear sinks off the wall, smash TVs and rip lamps apart. Even then he managed to smash a few. Jesus. Why would you.

[B]

Ripping a sink off the wall.

[A]

Why would you want this guy just

[B]

before security deposits at hotels? Is this why they always charge you an extra 75 when you check in?

[A]

How do you rip a sink off the wall?

[B]

I mean, I guess it's like, I. It's just crazy. You could. Why would you.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Ripping a sink off the wall.

[A]

After one loss March, Mark punched through his car's windshield.

[B]

That's like some Terminator.

[A]

I mean, how is this guy's hand not completely broken? Yeah, but he didn't use his throwing. Oh, but he didn't use his throwing hand, which he said made it okay. It doesn't actually.

[B]

So using your non dominant hand to break a windshield is pretty impressive.

[A]

During a game, he tried to break his spikes on the dugout steps and Frank yelled at him. Quote. Don't do that. If you're gonna do something, eat your goddamn hat instead.

[B]

Hey. Or a third option. Let's all get our emotions calm down. Better place.

[A]

Mark did eat his hat.

[B]

What do you mean, ate his hat?

[A]

Quote, every last fiber Mark denies it, saying he ripped it into tiny pieces with his hands instead.

[B]

That's still crazy. That's not an okay.

[A]

Ripping a baseball and a tiny piece.

[B]

Look, eating it's nuts, but ripping it up is very. I would. I'd almost rather eat it.

[A]

We should study this guy's hands in a lot.

[B]

We should see if Luke can eat a hat.

[A]

During the very last game of the 1975 season, Mark was up 9 to 0 in the sixth when he got a blister.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And he ended up losing. And he is furious.

[B]

Blisters got some problems coming its way that night.

[A]

Because it's last game of the season, all the players went to a steakhouse.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Mark was seething when a waiter put a plate with fries instead of potato in front of him. He loses it.

[B]

I mean, that's fair, though.

[A]

Quote, he picked up the french fries and threw them at her, hitting her on the back of the head.

[B]

Hey, let me just play the Go ahead. I'll. My guess is she's never going to do that again.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

That is the last time she messes up the side orders of the state.

[A]

How is she going to learn a

[B]

lesson now, you know?

[A]

Then he picked up the steak and fired it off the wall on the far side of the room.

[B]

You know, not great, obviously, but everybody

[A]

gets what's going on. I know.

[B]

I'm having trouble with this one. I'll be honest. I'm struggling with this one. Shank's not cooked because he got the order right. So I don't know what the plan is.

[A]

Got the order wrong.

[B]

Well, the first you got the steak is right. That's what I mean.

[A]

Maybe it was undercooked. Overcooked.

[B]

Just saying. The first one I get.

[A]

Is it wrong to throw a steak?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

It's not cooked properly. It gets the wall of the restaurant.

[B]

Yes, it is. Yes, it is.

[A]

You can do that at Morton's Steak. No, it's very common. No, it is not to just fire steak off.

[B]

No, it isn't.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

The team make me say it's low stakes.

[A]

The team then tells the restaurant manager they don't know him.

[B]

He said, at your table.

[A]

I know, right?

[B]

He's in the. He's in the same uniform as all of you guys.

[A]

Frank was his friend. Quote, But Hey, I love the guy. He's Italian, that's all. Hot blooded. So it's an Italian thing. This is a classic Italian guy thing, huh? Just throwing stakes off walls and whatnot.

[B]

Look, of course we were mad when he did that, but he's Italian.

[A]

He's Italian guy. Frank started calling Mark Mrs. Lemon, Jello quote. Because he's been. Because he'd always be washing and polishing the floors and cleaning up after me. Six in the morning and he'd be scrubbing the floors. Drop something. And he'd scream, my floor. My floor.

[B]

There's a lot going on here.

[A]

He's got a lot of something.

[B]

There's some compensatory dish.

[A]

There's something. There's a neurological something.

[B]

It's not a great pair.

[A]

Yeah, there's a. There's a. There's a mental health issue.

[B]

There's some stuff. My floor, my floor.

[A]

And again, this is when they don't, like, you're just a weird guy.

[B]

Yeah. No, they're not like, what's wrong? Hey, man, you.

[A]

You should probably get tested.

[B]

Get tested?

[A]

Yeah, they'd like, He's Italian.

[B]

He's Italian.

[A]

He told Frank not to walk on his floors.

[B]

Well, that's going to be pretty hard.

[A]

What do you want me to do, buddy? I live here.

[B]

I know, but if it's possible, just don't ever touch the floors with your feet or with your hands. Don't do it. Have you tried floating?

[A]

What?

[B]

Try floating.

[A]

You know, this whole Italian thing with you is just weird.

[B]

Shut your mouth. I'll cut your off and put it on your own mouth.

[A]

There he is.

[B]

Do me a favor, though. Shoes off, no socks, no feet on the floor.

[A]

Okay, I'll try, I guess. Just push against the walls or I

[B]

got a series of pulleys that can kind of drag you across the ceiling. You're gonna be fine. It's a cable system.

[A]

All right?

[B]

Weights and measurements.

[A]

I gotta say, it's a little weird

[B]

you look at me like that. I gotta pop you. There he is.

[A]

Spicy meatball guy.

[B]

Ah, no, no, no.

[A]

So tired of this. In the off season, Mark is traded to the Houston Astros and they assign him to AAA Memphis. So during spring training in 1976, word comes that Thomas is now dying. Okay, so Mark goes home and his mom said he was like a zombie. An Astros executive called and asked, quote, how long will it take before Tommy dies? And we need him because we need him back with the team.

[B]

That's a good.

[A]

Well, that's.

[B]

That's. That's good. Organization.

[A]

He tried.

[B]

That's a good Dave. That's a good organization.

[A]

Trying to say how important he is.

[B]

Excuse me, ma'. Am. I know you're going through a tough time when your other son dies. How long until your son adjusts?

[A]

Well, Thomas died soon after and Mark returned to the team. But he is a wreck, by the way. He was a wreck before he left. Yeah, that's.

[B]

They probably put him in the rec room.

[A]

His mother implored him to come home, which he did in July and spent three weeks on the Jersey shore trying to, quote, get his head together there.

[B]

Yeah. That's where you go. Get a T shirt spray painted, hang

[A]

out with Pauly D. Nice.

[B]

Go to the smush room.

[A]

Nice. Dig. He came back. I got it. He came back a bit better, but he's still sad.

[B]

Sure. What. What do they expect?

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

Their expectation is what? That he's just like, well, let's. Let's play ball.

[A]

Lost my little brother. Let's get out there. He doesn't like Memphis, and he told the Astros he deserved to be in the majors and wanted to be traded.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

AAA said, quote, the ballparks are terrible. The International League is supposed to be about 80 year olds, and it looks that age. Sorry. The baseball league is. The International League is supposed to be about 80 years old and it looks its age. The crowds aren't very good in Memphis. The only time they get a good crowd is when they give away free beer. About the only thing to do here is to drive by Elvis's house.

[B]

Free beer.

[A]

Free beer. Yeah.

[B]

Great.

[A]

Yeah. Then one game, he was taken out, and he responded to that by cutting his uniform with scissors into strips 12 inches long.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That's how you do it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yep. No, just turn it into, like, some drapes.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

He gets a reputation for throwing hair dryers in the clubhouse.

[B]

Well, that's. I mean, that's, you know, a lot of. There's a lot of hair dryers in the clubhouse of baseball teams.

[A]

Well, plus, he's a baseball player. Yeah. Going to do. Throw it.

[B]

Absolutely.

[A]

It's the whole job. Yeah. But still, even with all this behavior, he still gets a call up to the major leagues.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

And his MLD MLB debut was in front of 970 people in Atlanta on September 14, 1976. He did well. He finished 3 and 1 that year with a 2.79 ERA. And he looks like he's going to be part of next year's Astros team on October 30, 1970. 6. Mark and his cousin Peter make an appearance at Bonnie Buick in Ocean Township, New Jersey, which Mark's dad owns.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And Mark was given a lemon colored 1977 Buick.

[B]

Nice.

[A]

You get it.

[B]

Lemon, lemon, lemon. Buick. Yeah.

[A]

The Daily Register wrote, quote, first cousins who are like brothers. But 1977 is actually not a good year for Peter. His second album.

[B]

He's got a beautiful voice.

[A]

The second album's coming out.

[B]

He's got the porcelain throat.

[A]

Do I love you.

[B]

It was sung into a mirror.

[A]

After it was released, his label, Private Stock, shut down.

[B]

I was gonna say I'd never heard of him, but that's tough. Do I. Writing these love songs is so annoying. I mean, I don't.

[A]

But this was. There was an explosion of love songs.

[B]

I was gonna say, like, I remember in the 80s, like, there. That's a lot of that 70s.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

A lot of that stuff where it was just. You were like, oh, my God, enough. Do. Do I love you.

[A]

Okay. So album doesn't sell, singles don't chart. That's it for his recording career.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

And he hadn't paid off his backers. And he declares bankruptcy. And then he moves to Florida. He's going to start over.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

New wife. He gets into home construction.

[B]

Great. Okay. Took a lot of. There was a lot of investment in

[A]

that music career, but remember, he was doing home construction before?

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Right.

[B]

So.

[A]

But he does keep singing. Doing live shows. You can't give up the dream.

[B]

No.

[A]

Because you don't know when someone's going to see you.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then.

[B]

Well, he is a bit of a name.

[A]

I guess so. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Mark is the Astros number three pitcher the next season. His anger, however, is getting worse. And now he starts slapping himself really hard in the face when he makes a bad pitch.

[B]

Well, we. We all know someone like that. And they're. They're fine. That's a fine thing to be, that.

[A]

That makes the whole team feel more confident.

[B]

Yeah. You like to see a guy who kicks his own ass. Let's hug him.

[A]

Sometimes. He did it so hard, he would leave a handprint on his face.

[B]

That's fine, too.

[A]

That's good. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. He pitched okay, but the Astros never scored. They just weren't a good team. And half through this, halfway through the season, he has the worst record in baseball. And so in.

[B]

Peter lemoncello had the worst record. Yeah.

[A]

I'll give you that one. I'm giving it to you. You are being given. In interviews. Mark starts blaming his teammates for not scoring for his losses. So That's. That's really.

[B]

What does that do to a locker room, Dave? I'm not a sports guy. They like that.

[A]

Look at these fucking shits.

[B]

They like that stuff.

[A]

They love it.

[B]

That's cool.

[A]

During a game in Chicago, Mark loses it over a call and he's kicked out of the game. And he yells all the way to the dugout. And then he turned and flips on off the ump with both hands. So double bird. Then he goes into the clubhouse and he wrecks the clubhouse. When his teammates come in after the game, their stuff is all over the floor.

[B]

I didn't know. You can't take it to the guy's stuff.

[A]

No, you can't. And Mark is asleep.

[B]

This is good.

[A]

On the food table. His head.

[B]

Guys, I know we're all mad, but he's really.

[A]

Hey, let Mark sleep.

[B]

He's tucking himself out.

[A]

Look at that cute little guy there. Look at him sleeping away. He looks like a little baby.

[B]

He slept terribly last night. Oh, he was up all night. He went to Taylor and Danny's.

[A]

Oh, ice cream. Yeah. So let's just leave him.

[B]

Beautiful.

[A]

Everybody pick up your stuff quietly. Let's get out of here.

[B]

Sweep up your shattered items. Let's go.

[A]

His head was in a bowl of mayonnaise.

[B]

Hey, should we get his head out of the bowl of mail before we go? What do you think? Why do you think his head's in

[A]

the bowl of mayo? Hey, can I pick it up and lick it? And I lick the side of his face?

[B]

Just get mayo on the outside.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

We're trying to let him sleep. I will say it's a strange pillow.

[A]

Do you think that's good for skin?

[B]

No, no, no. I mean, it's got egg in it, which is amazing, but probably not. No.

[A]

I don't know why you focus on the egg.

[B]

I'm not. I'm not. I'm just saying the whole thing is.

[A]

No, but you just talk.

[B]

Well, you wouldn't. You wouldn't be able to have mayonnaise without eggs, but that's fine. So neither here nor there. I'm just saying let's let him sleep in it. He's got a pillow made of gold with the egg parts. Well, yeah.

[A]

Again, the male part.

[B]

The other part is fine, too.

[A]

What's the other part? Jism. Jesus Christ.

[B]

What? It just goes to show that you can mix eggs with anything. It's beautiful. It's a beautiful choice.

[A]

So Mark, with his head in the bowl of mayonnaise, refuses to get up until everyone.

[B]

Hey, Mark.

[A]

Until everyone left.

[B]

Hey, Mark, do you want to get out of the Mayo?

[A]

Mark, we're gonna turn off the lights, okay?

[B]

Fine. I'm fine.

[A]

Just blowing bubbles in it.

[B]

Don't blow mayo bubbles, buddy. There's a good way to drown in there. It's very.

[A]

Imagine walking out of the locker room being like, so that guy's my teammate.

[B]

Who is that? He's one of our players.

[A]

By the end of the year, he did turn a season around, and he won a bunch of games, but his behavior was just too much. And they trade him to the Toronto Blue Jays.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

They're like, you know the thing where you put your head in the mayonnaise?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. So that's not great.

[B]

My era has been really good, though.

[A]

I know, but it affects the. The team when you're just laying on the food table in the Man.

[B]

What do you want me to do? Mustard?

[A]

No, we're thinking. Don't do anything like that.

[B]

And what the. What do I put my head in those?

[A]

Well, you just sit there at your locker.

[B]

I'll do Mayo.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

I'll keep doing Mayo.

[A]

Okay. The first thing he did was ask a reporter, and this is about asking about Toronto. If they, quote, spirit spoke American in

[B]

Toronto, they got mail.

[A]

So at this point, his reputation is terrible.

[B]

For what reason?

[A]

I don't know why he. His nickname is Super Flake.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

The director of media relations for the Astros said, quote, if he was knocked out of a game, he'd kick over chairs break hair dryers. If one of his teammates made an error, he'd glare at them or give them hell out on the field. And sometimes he'd give the umpires the choke sign if things didn't go his way. But the kid's got talent. If he does, if he doesn't grow up, he'll waste it all.

[B]

Wow. So he was good.

[A]

He's good. But that doesn't matter.

[B]

Like, why? Oh, the Fury and the Mayo sleeping. Yeah.

[A]

The Mayo sleeping in the Fury. Yeah. Yeah. So Mark is mad about the trade, if you can imagine. And he doesn't respond to any calls or letters from the Blue Chase.

[B]

Wow. Wow. I don't know. You could gust your trade team.

[A]

Yeah, well, you're quitting, Basically.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. His mother said, quote, he never dreamed he'd be traded to a foreign team. What's a Toronto? What's a Toronto? He asked.

[B]

This is a failure of the educational system, the.

[A]

Of Toronto.

[B]

It's a city.

[A]

What are you talking about? Is city. Is it in America? Well, it's not A city. Well, we have cities in America. It's not in America.

[B]

Toronto's a city.

[A]

They say speak American up there.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

What the. In Toronto.

[B]

It's a city.

[A]

What the. What's that even mean?

[B]

Well, there's a lot of cities. What does Cleveland mean? You don't know.

[A]

It's a city. It's a great American city.

[B]

Yeah, but you don't know what it means.

[A]

It means city.

[B]

So does Toronto.

[A]

It's not in America. The Are you doing.

[B]

Toronto is a city. They're all cities. Canada has a lot of cities.

[A]

Do you have mayonnaise? I need to call.

[B]

No, don't go laying down.

[A]

I need.

[B]

No need to call. No, you're not laying in the man. No, you're not. No, no, no, no.

[A]

Oh, God, it feels so much better. This is where I belong. Okay. His mom admitted she brainwashed him to think the US Was the best country in the world.

[B]

That's. Imagine a generation of that.

[A]

The Blue Jays president wrote Mark a letter with clippings about how great Toronto.

[B]

Funny that the president of the Blue Jays isn't a bird.

[A]

It should be.

[B]

What did he write?

[A]

He wrote. He wrote a letter with clippings about a great Toronto Was. He's like, trying to sell him. But why would you want him on your team at this point?

[B]

The idea that. It's pathetic.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

To be sending a guy's newspaper clippings.

[A]

Look, we're nice.

[B]

How good is Toronto?

[A]

He sent Mark's mom a lovely brew Blue Jays brooch. There's no such thing. There's no such thing.

[B]

There's like. I could see that being nice, but for a guy who, like. I mean. Yeah, I could see that. Oh.

[A]

Soon after, Mark booked a flight to Toronto.

[B]

This is the brochure.

[A]

Nice to my mom.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

You know, you go up there. You go up there and show them

[B]

they're not like us. But it seems like they could be. They give gifts.

[A]

Lots of gifts. The Blue Jays gave him a two year, $160,000 contract.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

A month in. The Blue Jays director has nothing but good things to say about Mark.

[B]

This is all gonna be okay.

[A]

Yes. Quote, if I had to rate them from 1 to 38 in terms of flakiness, I'd put him number 38. No kidding. This doesn't seem like the guy we've been hearing about yet. No, that's it. It's the end of the story.

[B]

I mean, the after game mail things. Weird.

[A]

One reporter.

[B]

You guys. You guys hit in the mail. Mind if I do?

[A]

He's always got mayo with him. One reporter asked if he had a nickname, quote, you know, like Destroyer or Madman or Super Flake. The director. Yeah. He has Lemon. They call him Lemon.

[B]

Yeah, but do they. That's in his last name.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, do you want to call him Zest?

[A]

Nice. Lemon.

[B]

His name is Lemon Jello.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

So the idea of a nickname, it's a short nickname. Yeah. But you'd like. You'd maybe call him like Mark when life gives you Lemon Cello.

[A]

Now he's long. Lemon.

[B]

Sure. All right, good.

[A]

You got any more questions?

[B]

No. That's a good point that you've made.

[A]

When Mark was asked by a reporter about destroying clubhouses, he said, quote, I occasionally went bananas, but I was always fined and always paid Banana Jello. But in Toronto, he didn't play well, and he had a 6.19 ERA and he was one win and nine losses.

[B]

It's bad.

[A]

On June 3, the manager comes to take him out of a game, and Mark throws the baseball at him.

[B]

Yeah, I don't love it.

[A]

Literally unheard of.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Never happened before.

[B]

Well, thank God he missed. He was like, all right, you're way off.

[A]

He does not start again. In late July, he had a screaming match with the manager, and so the Blue Jays sent him down to aaa.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And when Mark was told, he threw an ashtray at the general's manager. General manager barely missing his head.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

That's how you do it.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

Well, you can just take a trade sitting down, hurt.

[B]

No, this is. This is not a business.

[A]

He spent the rest of the season in aaa. And the Blue Jays traded Mark to the Cubs in April 1980.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And they. They keep him in AAA. He's just not pitching well while there he being close friends with pitcher Manny Sion. But then both.

[B]

That's how I say mansion.

[A]

I wish that had not happened. Yeah. Pretty soon, they're. They're both out of baseball, though. They're just not good. They get cut.

[B]

Not good. They were talking about these two out of baseball. Not good.

[A]

Mark Lemon Jello had left the PBA in. Mike Langello left PBA in 1975. So we got Mike and Peter brothers, and we got Mark, the cousin quote. It was just no fun anymore. Now there. There's a lot of things I think you can do in life that aren't fun, but making a living bowling, it's the easiest thing in the world.

[B]

I mean, if you're good at it.

[A]

What are we doing? Yeah, but he is good.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

He's bored.

[B]

I used to like Watch a bowling on tv.

[A]

Yeah, I did, too.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It was one. It was like the number one sport

[B]

for something very compelling about it there.

[A]

I agree. So he lives in Florida in 1978, and with Peter, he creates the Heron Development Corporation. They're going to build condos and houses. Great.

[B]

Finally.

[A]

So Mark worked for heron for about six months, and Sion invested 45,000 in heron development.

[B]

In what?

[A]

In the Herent Development, the corporation they made to build the houses.

[B]

Right.

[A]

So they're all. Now all these guys are together, plus this other guy, Sion. At some point, Mark introduces the brothers to ex Astros teammate Joe Sambito. And Sambito signs a contract for Heron to build his new home.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And Mark's like, I should get a finder's fee.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

And they offered him 10,000. It's pretty good. $10,000?

[B]

Yeah. Great.

[A]

Yeah. And Mark's like, no, I deserve way more than that.

[B]

Yeah, good.

[A]

And he wanted them to give back the $45,000 Sion had invested because the development that he invested in was not being built yet.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

So there's anger and tension, money owed,

[B]

frustration, the cousins and the brothers.

[A]

And it's. Yeah. So the house that's being built for Sambido, it just keeps getting more and more expensive, costs going up. And Sambito is, like, watching. And he's seen problems with the construction. And on December 22, a home Peter has been building, but he's fired from the job. Suddenly, the house suddenly burns down mysteriously. What that's about, I don't know. I don't know.

[B]

Because he had nothing to do with it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I mean, he was off the job for God.

[A]

Yeah. He wasn't there anymore. So before noon on January 15th, Mike and Peter were at the construction site discussing it with Sambido. And Mark and Sant and Sion drive up in a green van.

[B]

Good.

[A]

Jump out.

[B]

Right.

[A]

And attack Mike and Peter. Sion goes after Mike while Mark and Peter are rolling around fighting. And Sampino.

[B]

Throat. Not the throat.

[A]

And Sampito's there. And he tries to break it up, but then Mark pulls out a revolver and points it at Sambito, who backs off.

[B]

Smart.

[A]

So Mark orders Mike and Peter into the van.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And they resist. So Mark hits Peter with the butt of the gun. Oh, a gash on the back of his head.

[B]

Oh, my God. What are you doing? You smacked your cousin in the head. So, next step is. I could be. Oh. But I guess we'll get inside of this van. Oh, man. Oh, baby, I love you. When we're together. We're in the bed. Feels like forever. I love you, my baby boo. I need you. Okay.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

So we'll be in the vent.

[A]

Yeah. Okay.

[B]

I just want to tell you that's

[A]

where we're gonna go.

[B]

And I don't love what you're doing over here.

[A]

What do you mean?

[B]

The violence out here is not.

[A]

Oh, no, we're just doing. No, it's all good.

[B]

I know, but we're on the same team.

[A]

Mind your business. Wow. Sorry.

[B]

I thought I knew you. Oh, I did.

[A]

The thing is, this is.

[B]

I thought I knew you.

[A]

It's gonna turn into a love song.

[B]

So that right when I read myself of Sheila, Sheila, what a summer with you.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Sheila, Sheila, what a time. You and me too.

[A]

My name's Debbie.

[B]

It's not about you.

[A]

So they get. Get the brothers in the van. Then they drive off and they drive to Southeast bank where Sion kept the gun on Peter in the van while Mark took Mike in and made him take out over $50,000 from a safe deposit box.

[B]

Jesus Christ.

[A]

After they drive Mark and Peter to a force area and make them get out.

[B]

A forest area.

[A]

A forest area. A place where there's.

[B]

He has to be like, I was a singer.

[A]

Hey, this went weird.

[B]

I'm Peter Lemoniello. So I guarantee you, like, he probably on the drive was saying stuff like, you know, this is going to be a huge story. You've kidnapped Peter Lemon. Jello, Peter, Nobody knows who you are, baby.

[A]

So Sion apparently couldn't take the life of crime because four days later on Tuesday morning, he called a lawyer and offers to turn himself in. And eight hours later, he walked into jail. And soon after, Mark turned himself in and admitted it all. Now Mark let the cops know Peter had committed crimes. So now he's like, he just kidnapped them.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Stole money. And now he's like, that guy's the bad guy. So the sheriff's office started an investigation on two arson cases and discovered Peter had offered a hundred thousand dollars to Carl Buddy Lech, a house painter, to burn down the house under construction. And another house.

[B]

Why do you pay? So I'm not even being like 100 grand for two arsons. There's a lot of money.

[A]

A thousand. Did I say?

[B]

Oh, I thought you said a hundred thousand. Oh, okay.

[A]

The second arson was a house Peter had once lived in but sold the year before. So that was a set of spite. Just.

[B]

Just do your own arson.

[A]

My house.

[B]

Do your own arson.

[A]

On Wednesday the 9th, let's came to Peter's house acting weird and wanting to talk. Peter and his wife told him to leave, but he wouldn't leave, so they called the cops. Turns out there were two plankos cops nearby. And they arrested Peter for arson. So he was trying to get him to snitch. Yeah. He ended up being convicted of arson, bribery, fraud, vandalism, and criminal mischief. The judge gave him 10 years probation.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

What the.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Like, I'm not for people getting huge prison sentences, but that's hilarious. Mark and Seon each got seven years probation for kidnapping.

[B]

Wow. This judge was just like, look, boys will be boys. This is crazy. But yeah, you guys. You guys seem pretty upset.

[A]

Mark went back to Phoenix and then kept out of the limelight. Sambito now sues Peter for not finishing his house. And when he was visiting Long island, he saw that Peter was performing at a cafe.

[B]

At a cafe.

[A]

So he went in and he was seated in the front row. And as Peter sang to the crowd, his eyes settle on Sambito.

[B]

She's a beautiful woman. She's the one for me. She's the what the.

[A]

So he's jarred for a moment, but then he regroups. And he stared at Sambita while he's saying, I did it my way.

[B]

I did it my you way. You. You piece of. You. I'll do it again. I do it again and again. You.

[A]

Peter was later ordered to pay Sampo $439,000 for not finishing his house and bailing on the contract. In 1990, Peter filed for bankruptcy with 1.6 million in debts. Wow. In 1992, just as his probation was about to end, he was arrested for violating it. He had not repaid money. He owed an insurance company. He had been convicted of defrauding during his bankruptcy. So Peter does six months in jail.

[B]

Hand me the mail.

[A]

And in 1992, he OD'd on Valium, which cops suspected was a suicide attempt. He was still suicide? Yeah, he was still singing in small nightclubs and catering halls. Nothing like you're doing a catering hall gig.

[B]

All right, now, before we get into this next hit, if you want the wheat bread, flip your card over. And if you want the white, keep it where it is. This next song's about a lonely winner and a man who made it work for him.

[A]

Oops, sorry. I'm trying to pull up this next video.

[B]

Would you like me to sing a song while you wait?

[A]

No, all good, thanks.

[B]

The song's called Bread.

[A]

Go fuck yourself. That's the song. Go fuck yourself, you sons of bitch Bread.

[B]

It's the thing you dip your soup in. Bread. It's the stuff for sandwiches. Bread's the thing we like. Bread's important too. But I'll never forget the night between me and you. She was the most beautiful woman in the room that night.

[A]

All right, all right. We're good.

[B]

What?

[A]

Thanks. Yeah, no, we got it.

[B]

What? It's a song about bread.

[A]

We got it. We got it.

[B]

We held each other. Yeah, we got it.

[A]

All right. Thank you.

[B]

That night.

[A]

Thanks a lot. Thanks a lot.

[B]

It's about bread. I kissed her neck and nipple.

[A]

What?

[B]

Then I went down further to the belly button. But that was the just start of my whole work. Then I moved down slowly to her torso.

[A]

Hey, hey, hey. We're good. Thank you.

[B]

The pubis was where I kissed next. Oh, yeah.

[A]

That word has never been in a love song before.

[B]

I felt her shiver tight. She knew my lips were right. And I made my way down further to the spot that's hot. When then I said move my tongue around.

[A]

What are you doing?

[B]

Golden hole.

[A]

Jesus Christ.

[B]

That's where the lady hides her soul.

[A]

Oh, my God. Will you please leave?

[B]

I took out my tater tots.

[A]

I don't want to. Nobody wants.

[B]

Dipped it in near the G spots. And I. I had a good old time. But I finished before I got inside. Oh, boy, I'm gonna vomit. There was a pile of bread I made. It looked like mayonnaise. And then I cried about Mark. So that song's called Bread.

[A]

So at this point, he was. He was covering Billy Joel and Michael Bolton songs and he and his wife Karen moved to Branson in 1995 and he rents a theater.

[B]

Wait, wait, I thought he died.

[A]

No, he tried to. Oh.

[B]

Oh, I thought he. Okay. Oh, okay. Wow, what a turnaround. Now he's in Branson.

[A]

After three years, they moved back to South Florida with their three year old son.

[B]

Might have been better for him to die.

[A]

Peter Jr. Oh. Nothing is known about Mark's current life. Mike was inducted into the PBA hall of Fame in 1994. In 2012, Peter was doing a comedy music show called Meatballs, Matzo Balls and Lemon Jello in South Florida.

[B]

There is only one state where that could happen. Do you understand me? That's to the people of this country and other countries. We only have one state where meatballs, matzo balls and lemon jello would be able to work. Okay. It's a comedy thing. Singing, theater show. Because it's none of those things.

[A]

I gotta try to find this.

[B]

So would you like me to sing while you find it.

[A]

And 19.

[B]

Oh, wow.

[A]

Peter Lemongello Jr. Appeared on American Idol.

[B]

Oh, no.

[A]

He was eliminated, though the judge seemed to like him. Now the video I have of that is no longer up.

[B]

What?

[A]

Let me see if he.

[B]

Same.

[A]

It's exactly the same. Isn't it crazy?

[B]

It has a very distinct sound. That's terrible. Who is this for?

[A]

Well, he. He does like, look. He's like an old cronery.

[B]

Oh. He's like, how many followers?

[A]

He's probably doing.

[B]

That's the question. Is it working?

[A]

25,000.

[B]

It's not. It's not. Not working.

[A]

But it's like. I mean, if you can go look it up, it's Peter Lemon Jello Jr. On Instagram. And it's just. It's just weird. Like, he's like. It's like a guy from another time. Like, he's like trying to live through his dad's like, look at them. Look. He looks like a. Yeah, late six, the early 60s, late 50s. Like. Yeah, it's just weird. Peter Junior's doing gigs. His last scheduled gig was at the Villarreme Roma resort in the Catskills. Peter still tours and lives in Boca Raton, Florida.

[B]

Peter still tours.

[A]

Yeah, he's still. He's still doing this, whatever this is. But this is like, for old people, right? Like, I think he's just doing shows for.

[B]

There he is. Old.

[A]

Old people.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

And here and here. So here's. This was from January 26, 2024. The ad is the most explosive singer, dancer, performer to emerge in 40 years. Peter Lemongello Jr. In concert with his 16 piece orchestra featuring Bobby Nathan. Old time rock and roll special guest star, Mike Marino, New Jersey's bad boy of comedy Extra. Added attraction, the legendary Peter Lemongello. Do I love you. And that was at the Coral Springs center and Arts. So he must just be like for the villages.

[B]

16. Paying out 16 people in the band.

[A]

It's crazy.

[B]

It's a lot.

[A]

It's a lot of money. But if he's in an art center, I would imagine.

[B]

I hope all of you find this song as inspirational as I do during these very difficult times. This was for Covid.

[A]

I believe for every drop of rain

[B]

that falls a flower grows. I believe that somewhere in the darkest night. I think I riffed better songs on this episode.

[A]

There's something so there. There's something so tragic about a kid.

[B]

I just was experiencing this and I don't listen. Good luck to him, all that stuff. But yes, what you're about to say

[A]

is, okay, I love base. I love baseball, but I never thought I could be a professional. My kid plays baseball and he loves it. Yeah, but he loves it because I just love baseball. And he just picked it up. He's not trying to be a stamp comedian or whatever I did profession. And the other thing, the other level to that is is those things still exist in the world and people like them and they're a legitimate thing to do. This guy's.

[B]

Well, it's not like his dad was Neil diamond, but his Percy Diamond.

[A]

What his dad was doing was already out of time.

[B]

His dad. It didn't work.

[A]

It was out of time.

[B]

Then this is a copy of a copy.

[A]

And now you're talking about 2000 in the 2000s stuff. And he's doing something that was out of time as follow it is.

[B]

History has taught us anything. It's that this kid will burn down two houses. That's what you're saying. And I agree.

[A]

It makes me. It may watch that made. I was just like.

[B]

I agree. And that's why I don't even want to be too rude.

[A]

Yeah. I don't want to be too rude to him because whatever. He's probably.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

He's doing what he loves, I guess.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But it just. There's something so fucking tragic about his dad.

[B]

There's something about pigeonholing a child. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. He, he. It's clear that kid did not become that on his own. That was a construct.

[B]

Well, we wish him the best.

[A]

Oh, do sources.

[B]

Do you want me to sing the sources? No, here's all the places.

[A]

Asbury Park Press, the Pittsburgh Press, the Calgary Herald, Tampa Bay Times, New York Times, Toronto Sun, Palm Beach Post, Time Magazine, and then the Tonight Show.

[B]

We're out of time, we're out of touch. There's something we got too much.

[A]

Just insane. The world.

[B]

That is. That's crazy. It's crazy. That was a terrible prototype too. The like.

[A]

Oh, here he is on Crooner.

[B]

Here he is infomercial. What year car do you drive?

[A]

Oh, and then they show him driving.

[B]

Oh, he, he turned it into an ass 50s car.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Because they were like the American idol.

[B]

Harry Connick Jr. Is the as good as it gets.

[A]

Yeah, but like, you know, they're like. They thought I had an oddball and they did because he's really. I mean he dresses and looks like he's straight. Yes, he does.

[B]

What year car do you. Okay. We'd love to have him on a pastimes.

[A]

Oh man, I'm upset.

[B]

Let him go. That's the end of the episode. Thanks everybody. We wish you the best, Little Lemon Cello

[A]

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[B]

best of plans sometimes need a little support, so we plan for the plot twists. Every booking is automatically backed by our VRBO Care guarantee, giving you confidence from the very start. Whenever you need help, it's ready before your stay, through the moments in between and after your trip. Because a great trip starts with peace of mind and maybe a good playlist. But we've got the peace of mind part covered.