174 - The Past Times with David Rodriguez

Summary

The Dollop: The Past Times with David Rodriguez

Podcast: The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds
Episode: The Past Times with David Rodriguez
Release Date: May 15, 2026
Guest: David Rodriguez
Format: Comedians review a historical newspaper and riff on its stories

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Episode Overview

This episode of "The Past Times" features comedians Dave Anthony, Gareth Reynolds, and guest David Rodriguez (the "great D Rod"), as they dive into a 1951 issue of the "Arizona Republic." The trio playfully navigates bizarre historic news items, swap personal anecdotes, and indulge in sharp, irreverent banter about old media, enduring traditions, and social norms, all while highlighting the strange quirks of American life in the 1950s as revealed through the day's newspaper.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Setting the Stage: Guest Introduction & Banter

• [01:30 - 04:38] The podcast opens with typical playful ribbing, establishing the rapport and comedic chemistry between Gareth and the guest, David Rodriguez, who is lauded for running the Comedy Fort in Fort Collins.
  • Their banter ranges from joking about beard envy to David's wish for Gareth to get his picture on the club wall.

"But truly, David, I mean, you have just created like one of the greatest places."
— Gareth Reynolds [02:45]

2. Guessing the Newspaper Year

• [04:38 - 07:31] The annual "guess the year" tradition: Guest and hosts make guesses based on clues. The actual paper is from September 24, 1951, to the delight of Arizona native David Rodriguez.

"The Arizona Republic, the state's greatest newspaper is what it says."
— David Rodriguez [07:42]

3. The Stories: 1951 in the Arizona Republic

A. Public Wedding Proposals Go Wrong

• [08:45 - 13:01] The group riffs on a story about a groom nearly calling off a wedding at the altar in Italy, only to reverse his decision under family pressure. They question the wisdom of public proposals, referencing awkward or failed marriage proposals and sharing hilarious personal anecdotes around weddings.
  • Dave recounts his own engagement story, humorously marred by a mysterious acoustic guitar player, and Gareth recalls his stint on a wedding-prank reality show gone wrong.

"The balls you have to have to say no at that moment … and then they talk you back."
— David Rodriguez [12:12]

"Every wedding ended the same … It was people who were like, 'We flew from Australia. And you've, you've absolutely ruined what should have been a magical day.'"
— Gareth Reynolds [13:23]

B. Burning Trash: An Arizona Tradition

• [14:24 - 22:23] The hosts read a letter about the "offensive" and illegal practice of burning wet trash in Phoenix. They riff on the absurd specificity of wet trash, the oppressive climate in Phoenix, and how kids in the '50s navigated literal rock-bed playgrounds and scalding hot jungle gyms.
  • The group also bemoans the official 2-4 PM trash burning window and its resulting suburban smog.

"Like a phoenix, except on Special occasions."
— David Rodriguez [17:31]

"Children are God's filters … get that bad air in the kids and then get the good air, you know, out."
— Gareth Reynolds [20:46]

C. Mickey Rooney’s Divorce drama

• [25:07 - 34:21] The paper details the high-profile divorce of pint-sized Hollywood star Mickey Rooney. The hosts riff on Rooney’s stature, his turbulent romantic life, and his infamous roles with problematic portrayals. The discussion spirals into classic Hollywood gossip, the insular nature of fame pre-internet, and how the media treated "leading men."
  • They contrast fame in the 1950s (a handful of stars, three channels) versus today's social landscape.

"Was beautiful. Vickers was beautiful."
— David Rodriguez & Gareth Reynolds [27:46]

"He was the little one."
— Gareth Reynolds [34:15]

D. The “Dirty Weed” Panic—Tobacco, Gateway to Chaos

• [35:28 - 46:06] A scathing letter blames tobacco for leading "down the path" to marijuana and other vices, documenting a moral panic over public smoking by authority figures, ad campaigns featuring children and cigarettes, and a general nostalgia for (and horror at) 1950s societal norms.
  • The hosts admit to their own smoking histories and dissect how casual cigarette culture once was.

"The tobacco smoking habit leads to it and all other habits."
— Newspaper Letter, read by David Rodriguez [35:36]

"You're the most white trash Wisconsin people ever."
— David Rodriguez to Gareth Reynolds [39:57]

E. School Discipline: The Principal’s Beating

• [47:11 - 58:58] The panel tackles the surprisingly modern story of a school principal being beaten by a student’s mother with a paddle, leading to a trial. Dave and Gareth share personal stories about corporal punishment, both attesting to the prevalence and brutality of school paddling well into the 1980s.

"You should be able to pop one teacher."
— David Rodriguez [47:50]

"We each had our own paddle to give to the teacher."
— David Rodriguez [49:38]

F. Children Find Uranium—And Probably Die

• [59:07 - 62:49] The hosts are stunned by a story about three young boys in Texas discovering a 33-pound chunk of uranium—playing with it for months before adults intervened. Discussion turns to the lack of public safety around atomic materials in the era, referencing kids’ “uranium detector” toys and a local anecdote about a hazmat incident on Catalina Island leading to mysterious cancer rates.

"They played with it until their elders made them turn it over to authorities because it gave off dangerous sparks when handled roughly."
— David Rodriguez [61:20]

"What in the—so they were just. So these kids were probably like, we, we won."
— David Rodriguez [62:27]

G. Roving Gangs of Women Beat Up Bus Riders

• [63:45 - 65:08] The last story involves a man at a bus stop who’s pinned, robbed, and shoeless after a group of women assault him. The comedians riff on the reversal of gender norms and joke about the "roving woman gang" with playful energy.

"These women are awesome. I love a roving woman, gang."
— Gareth Reynolds [64:33]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• "Honestly, it's just the level that—what an absolutely gutting ceremony."
  — Gareth Reynolds [12:04]

• "Well, David, how—I mean, has it gotten better? Every time I go to Phoenix, I feel like trash burning is still very possible there."
  — Gareth Reynolds [14:51]

• "Apparently it, his height made it difficult for him to land traditional adult leading roles. Oh really?"
  — David Rodriguez [32:09]

• "You ever done dmt?"
  — David Rodriguez [36:50]
  "No, I'm good."
  — Gareth Reynolds [36:52]

• "Well, as we call it now a Waffle house."
  — Gareth Reynolds [65:52]

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• [01:30] - Guest introduction and Comedy Fort banter
• [07:31] - Reveal: Arizona Republic, September 1951
• [08:45] - Wedding proposal disaster story and personal anecdotes
• [14:24] - Trash burning and Phoenix’s climate oddities
• [25:07] - The Mickey Rooney divorce saga
• [35:28] - “The Dirty Weed” letter, smoking culture, and 1950s social critique
• [47:11] - Principal beaten by a mother; school corporal punishment discussion
• [59:07] - Kids find uranium; atomic era hazards, and modern parallels
• [63:45] - Women’s gang assault story
• [66:19] - Closing reflections on society’s progress (or lack thereof)

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Final Reflections

At the episode’s close, the trio reflect on how experience with old newspapers mirrors today’s doomscrolling—society hasn’t changed as much as we’d like to think, and the absurdity, violence, and moral panics of the past echo in modern anxieties and media. The Comedy Fort receives another genuine plug as the banter winds down.

"It was a nice glimpse into the equivalent of scrolling 70 years ago."
— Guest [65:30]

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Summary

This episode delivers a wild, comedically charged tour through the everyday oddities and scandals of America's mid-century past. From trash fires and celebrity drama to dangerous childhoods and flawed social norms, Dave, Gareth, and David Rodriguez dissect history’s punchlines—proving once again that human absurdity is timeless, and laughter is the best form of documentation.

Transcript

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[Gareth Reynolds]

Welcome to the Past times. It's a podcast. Someone's finally doing it. You know what we do here each week? We go through a newspaper from a random date in history picked out by none other than Dave Anthony. I, Gareth Reynolds, have never seen it. And neither has this week's guest, the great D Rod, David Rodriguez. Hi, David.

[David Rodriguez]

What's a good guest?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Shut up.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Hello.

[Gareth Reynolds]

How are you, buddy?

[David Rodriguez]

Hi.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Oh, I'm doing good. Doing good.

[David Rodriguez]

Yes. You have a serious man's beard. Like your beard is. Well, it's legit.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Where. Where do we start with. With da. Our guest, David Rodriguez, comedian, but also owner, manager of without question the best

[David Rodriguez]

waffle house in America.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Shut up. A top five comedy club in the cut. I mean, people do love it.

[David Rodriguez]

Everyone I talked to loves it.

[Gareth Reynolds]

The the comedy Fort in Fort Collins is top notch. And one the last time or maybe two times ago, I was on stage and I was like, the guy who runs this place is a former comedian and he was like, I still do comedy. I was like, I know, but you're. You're still do.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

But I used to too. But And I still do.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. Yeah. But I was like, I really was giving like a heartfelt like, this is an awesome place that he's like, I'm still a stand up. I was like, I'm so sorry. But, but truly, David, I mean, you have just created like one of the greatest places. It's just.

[David Rodriguez]

We get it. You want to work there again.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I work there every August. There's no. What I want is my picture on the wall. But there's no. I'm. There's no ass kissing other than you're

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

gonna have your picture on the wall. You're gonna have. No, we're gonna have like Gareth Reynolds day in Fort Collins. Like, he's. He's in with the past mayor, the current mayor, all future mayors,

[Gareth Reynolds]

all true.

[David Rodriguez]

What are you doing?

[Gareth Reynolds]

This is what I do when you're not around.

[David Rodriguez]

I know, but it's. It's disturbing.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It's awesome. Well, David, thank you for joining us. And it's snowing in Colorado on Cinco de Mayo. Is that okay?

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

It is currently snowing large clump flakes and making everything take 15 to 20% longer than anticipated.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I think we were driving through on tour and I honestly think we saw snow like June 1st. Like, we were up in the mountains a little bit, but I definitely.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah, probably.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Are we all going to die?

[David Rodriguez]

David, I just remembered it's my.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Well, I mean, eventually.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You promise?

[David Rodriguez]

No, but we're talking like in the next. In the next 12 years.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay. Yeah, I. Yeah, 12 years feels right. Yeah, 12 years.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah. Just three more terms.

[Gareth Reynolds]

He's. I swear to God, he's gonna live longer than me. David, you know what we do here. You often text me how much you love this show, as does every guest. We're gonna go through an old stinky newspaper and an old stinky man's gonna read it to us.

[David Rodriguez]

What the is your problem?

[Gareth Reynolds]

I'm having some fun. Lighten up. This is the show now. I'm like a nice guy, but, David, you get. If you get first guess at what year this paper is going to be from, it could be 1800s, it could be 1700s, could be 1900s, but just

[David Rodriguez]

a shot to 2100s.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Well, I mean, you said it's paper, so it's got to be ancient. This we're talking. So we're talking pre 2000 2010.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I think that's safe.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah, that's safe.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I think that's safe.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

I tried to. I. I tried to. My only recent interaction with a newspaper is we're trying to change my Son's last name. We're trying to, like, update it, and you still have to go through. You have to, like, publish it in a newspaper.

[David Rodriguez]

Really? What are you trying to get rid of him? Like, why are you changing his last name? A lot of questions you're trying to. Is he gonna come home one day

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

and you're like, this name change in a newspaper. And I tried to go to the newspaper office here in Fort Collins, and it was boarded up. It was like, no, they don't exist.

[David Rodriguez]

They should think you probably change that law.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I cannot believe that feels like printing press. What. What is the point of that? You just need to. Can't you just take an electric bill? What happened to that? That felt like. That was the. That was where we landed on that. Yeah.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

This is just, like, step one, like, 12.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Like, what's the article?

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Been trying to. We've been trying to do it since he was born. It was just literally, you have to, like, pay to say, like, this person is changing their name, and it's like you have to run three days, and then you have to take it back to the court, and they have to stamp it, and they have to.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Let me guess. Then he's competing in women's sports. It's a whole. And we don't even get into that stuff here. But I'll tell you what. Yeah. You know what I mean? No, I'm just saying keep. You know what I mean? I don't want to poop next to a woman. All right, David, go ahead with. Go ahead with your guests.

[David Rodriguez]

I just love the idea of his kid coming home one day, and. And they're like, sorry, you're.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You're.

[David Rodriguez]

Your last name's Tompkins now.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You're a Jackson. You don't live here. That's the move.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah, we're. Yeah, we're changing it to Tompkins. That's right. There's one of the stipulations of. Of booking the pod, as Preston told me, I had to change my kid's last name to Tompkins.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah, I mean, that's worth it.

[Gareth Reynolds]

No, we. We. Yeah. This is a lofty booking. A lot of people don't understand the. We're like the Rumpelstiltskin of riders.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah, yeah, Absolutely.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

So far. Worth it. All right. 1900 even.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Great. Wow. Very nice.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah. Clean.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Clean.

[David Rodriguez]

How are you gonna it up?

[Gareth Reynolds]

1888.

[David Rodriguez]

Wrong. It's 1951.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay. He wins. He wins. That's very. I'm very happy for him.

[David Rodriguez]

Are you?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yes, I am.

[David Rodriguez]

Usually Gareth yells when the person Wins.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, I'm the one who. Yeah, I'm the one who's known for yelling.

[David Rodriguez]

It's very uncomfortable.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah.

[David Rodriguez]

The Arizona Republic, the state's greatest newspaper is what it says.

[Gareth Reynolds]

David's from Arizona.

[David Rodriguez]

Phoenix, Arizona. Are you from Phoenix?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yep. Well, I went to Arizona State and lived there for a while.

[David Rodriguez]

Okay. September 24th, 1951. Wait, is that a five?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, wow. I might not be out yet.

[David Rodriguez]

Groom.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Boom.

[David Rodriguez]

That'd be awesome.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Boy. To change name.

[David Rodriguez]

I mean, the earliest one we did was, like, 1611 or something.

[Gareth Reynolds]

We did like a 1611 with Adam Khan over and. And very quickly, the stakes were removed because Adam was like, I think that's also invented. And we're like, hey, all right, man. Just play along a little bit more in the zone of the idea. Okay.

[David Rodriguez]

That's what David Cross did when we had him on the dollop.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah.

[David Rodriguez]

He's like, yeah, I don't believe this.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. The whole time he's like, that didn't happen.

[David Rodriguez]

Groom. Flabbergast. Sweating with no.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Wow. Great. Great start.

[David Rodriguez]

Did you see the. I don't know what game it was. I was at a baseball game the other day, and a guy asked a woman to marry him with the camera on him, and she didn't. She was just like, why?

[Gareth Reynolds]

I don't. Yeah. I don't get the idea. Well, I guess my same note on this would be, why the public.

[David Rodriguez]

I don't know.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You know what? I mean? It really. The public proposal is crazy.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah. No, I agree, because I. I've definitely seen a few that have. She's been like, no. Yeah. And then you're on camera, and it's

[Gareth Reynolds]

like, okay, I think it is. You're trying to box her. Box.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah. Boxer. Well, this one didn't go well.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah, it's gotta be, because if you're. If you're going public without knowing for sure what the answer is, that's a crazy move.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Well, you definitely have to have had you. You have to have the conversation. Yeah.

[David Rodriguez]

If you're gonna do that, you have to have the conversation.

[Gareth Reynolds]

But there are people now whose job it is to, like, kind of stow away for the proposal, like on a hike, and then they kind of pop out and.

[David Rodriguez]

Ever tell you what happened when I. When I proposed?

[Gareth Reynolds]

She made the biggest mistake of her life.

[David Rodriguez]

We were on top of Mount Taylor pies because that's where I used to go and do mushrooms, so why not ask someone to marry you there?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Sure.

[David Rodriguez]

And. And it's in the middle of nowhere. Like, we're Just you can oversee San Francisco stuff. So I get on the. I propose and she says yes. And then all of a sudden we hear a guitar and there's this dude who just happened to be up.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Wow.

[David Rodriguez]

Who just happened to be upset with his guitar. Slash he just starts playing the gu.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Wow. Good lord.

[David Rodriguez]

She's like, did you pay that guy? I'm like, I have no idea.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Absolutely I did. You're 100, right?

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Absolutely, yeah. 100.

[Gareth Reynolds]

The waiting for the ceremony to say no is a very.

[David Rodriguez]

Oh, yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Very strange shade on again.

[David Rodriguez]

I get it. I get it. Yeah. I get it. This is out of Italy. Trust me. I tell my wife this all the time. I should have said no.

[Gareth Reynolds]

No.

[David Rodriguez]

She gets it. A bridegroom said no at the altar Sunday and almost broke up the wedding ceremony. Almost. I would say that.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Breaking up. Yeah. It's very close.

[David Rodriguez]

Hey, first, this is what you do. No, let's party.

[Gareth Reynolds]

The priest. I don't get paid until a bouquet gets a tossed. Huh? We're gonna keep it going.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

But he was the best man stepped. It's like that Seinfeld bit where they're talking about if they're all dressed the same, you know, he's the best man. He just steps in in case he just.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I'll do it. I would love to have her.

[David Rodriguez]

What?

[Gareth Reynolds]

I would like to her.

[David Rodriguez]

Okay.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I'm willing to.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Everybody in Arizona in the 50s were Italian. And this is a known.

[David Rodriguez]

Yes.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Documented fact.

[David Rodriguez]

That's correct.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

The impression is accurate.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That's right. Where Phoenix comes from. Tucson. I mean, come on.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah.

[David Rodriguez]

The most Italian name ever. He. He was Sante. Yeah, he was Sante Silvestro. Stunned relatives of the bride, Palmira Rangon persuaded him change his mind. And the ceremony was finally performed.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, what the.

[David Rodriguez]

No, no, no, no. Sante. What are you doing?

[Gareth Reynolds]

That is even that bride. That's terrible.

[David Rodriguez]

You like a spicy meatball.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Shut up.

[David Rodriguez]

What?

[Gareth Reynolds]

That's terrible. Please. We all dressed up. Yeah.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Do I. She's like.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Do I have to remind you who my family is?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, yes. All right.

[David Rodriguez]

You sure you want to do that?

[Gareth Reynolds]

I'm very excited. Yeah. I mean, honestly, it's just the level that. What an absolutely gutting ceremony.

[David Rodriguez]

The balls you have to have. First of all, he's gonna do it.

[Gareth Reynolds]

We've. We talked to him. He'll do it. He just. He's not in love. But we'll get through today.

[David Rodriguez]

The amount of courage you have to have to say no at that moment.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Awesome.

[David Rodriguez]

Is huge. And then. Then they talk you back like so. You did your big thing.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah.

[David Rodriguez]

And then they're like, no, you don't mean to.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That he's on a condensed timeline because that's what happens with breakups where you're like, this is what I want to do. And then the three hours later, like, what? I need her. I needed her.

[David Rodriguez]

Sante explained he gave his no answer to win a bet he made with friends the night before.

[Gareth Reynolds]

This is a while.

[David Rodriguez]

That's a lie. That part's the lie.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

The night, the night before. Yeah, yeah. That's what. Bachelor party. What is that?

[Gareth Reynolds]

That's. Well, that's like rehearsal dinner. That's. That's where it's like, you know, you know, solidified.

[David Rodriguez]

You know what? It would be funny Sunday except for you go, no. If you cut up there and you'll go, no.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And then. Yeah, I care to make it interesting. Papagione.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

You want to give your. Give your. Give your. Nona heart attack. She flew halfway across the world, all the way to Arizona.

[MacKenzie (GoFundMe story narrator)]

That's.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I, I, my, my first, like, acting job and I'm air quoting. When I got to LA was I was on a show called the Real Wedding Crashers. And so you would pull pranks at weddings. And it was absolute, absolutely a train wreck of a show and an experience. And every wedding ended the same. After the reveal, there was not like, oh, wow, that was so fun. It was people who were like, we flew from Australia. We flew from Australia. And you've, you've absolutely ruined what should have been a magical die.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

That was, that was great. My sister, my sister's husband is Australian and I met his entire family. And that is that I can confirm that impression as, as accurate.

[Gareth Reynolds]

See that.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Because I, because I performed the ceremony and they said that to me almost word for word.

[Gareth Reynolds]

The pranks, they're like, are we even being film, David? No, we're not. No, no, I'm sorry.

[David Rodriguez]

Burning trash. Bad habit. A letter from Finley Peter Dunn in an adjacent column calls attention to an offensive, annoying, and sometimes illegal practice which both city and county authorities are seeking to stamp out in the vicinity of Phoenix. Well, you're, you're padding. When you say vicinity of Phoenix, you could just say Phoenix.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I mean, Phoenix. Well, David, how. I mean, has it gotten better? Every time I go to Phoenix, I feel like trash burning is still very possible there.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah, it's, it's, it's, it's indiscernible from the normal smell or general, you know,

[Gareth Reynolds]

it's really of the region. Yeah. The heat does the. I mean, eventually, God's, gonna start burning the trash in Phoenix without.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Well, if that hasn't started, if you just set it outside for too long, it will combust. So there's really.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Is, is it not the worst? I think it is the worst climate in America. Maybe Vegas has it beat, but every time I go there, Palm Springs is pretty bad. Yeah, but there's something about Phoenix where it's just, it's so bad. I don't know if there's anything so humid.

[David Rodriguez]

I don't know if there's any difference between Phoenix and Vegas on that.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Maybe. I don't know. Every time I go there and then the people always do the dry heat thing where they're like, it's dry.

[David Rodriguez]

Oh, it's a dry heat.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah, yeah. I mean, you just, you just don't go outside. It's. Everything is just weird.

[Gareth Reynolds]

But that's bad. That's a bad.

[David Rodriguez]

The first time I went. The first time, it is bad. My, my wife's mom was living there for a little while and I just remember going there and it was the first time like I'd gone there, but I'd always been like in the city and then now I was out in the suburbs and I was just like, oh God, there's no, there's no lawns and the kids really don't have anything to play on because it's just all rocks out your yard. Like the whole thing. I was like, how could you?

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Every park, every park, jungle gym is like just. That's the most intense, blistering hot, scalding metal possible.

[Gareth Reynolds]

If you don't do the marky bars right, you fall on a bed of steaming rock. It's like a Tony Robbins Course your

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

hand gets burned like Joe Pesci and in Home Alone when he grabs the doorknob every time he's like trying to hang on.

[David Rodriguez]

And then asphalt is hot, so you can't, you can't, you can't go outside.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Well, then their solution is like every 30ft there's a little mister. You're like, we're dying, but there's a mister on your way to the crab restaurant.

[David Rodriguez]

Okay, so this is the habit of burning trash, especially wet or ill smelling refuse. I love. Okay, so how you burn. This is where I disagree with. I love burning wet trash. You ever get a nice pile of wet trash?

[Gareth Reynolds]

You can't do that.

[David Rodriguez]

Well, once you do it, you will never forget it. Oh, man, it's great.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Good lord. Wet trash burning the wet garbage. Phoenix rising from the wet ashes.

[David Rodriguez]

Like a phoenix, except on Special occasions. And then by permission of the police department, there is really little.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Officer, can I burn my dumpster?

[David Rodriguez]

May I burn my trash?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Excuse me. We're having.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

We're having a nice wedding. We gotta burn some wet garbage. That is the Arizona tradition.

[Gareth Reynolds]

No, no, the weddings are off. Just epis. No.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah, the groom. The groom's the one writing the. Writing the letter in a passive aggressive. It's like, nope, I don't respect my wife's trash burning traditions.

[David Rodriguez]

This was when. So we had a. When I was. When I was growing up, we had a ranch and.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You had a ranch?

[David Rodriguez]

Our family had a ranch.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, yeah. Right, right.

[David Rodriguez]

And they would burn the trash. Like that was common out there. And they do.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

In a barrel.

[David Rodriguez]

There was, like a trash burning.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Sure. Right.

[David Rodriguez]

So I could see how it could be wet.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I'm still not following the wet part. Why?

[David Rodriguez]

Because it rains a little bit or, you know, whatever. Sure, it's wet.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Fire and water were not. They did. They were not bedfellows.

[David Rodriguez]

Well, you're not any. You're not a west coast guy.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Wow.

[David Rodriguez]

Our range is a little bit different out here.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Cool guy. The guitar players.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Garbage.

[David Rodriguez]

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Got knocked over his mic. It's okay. It's okay. It only sounded like something terrible happened.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

I've got a pretty. I got a pretty precarious setup. My daughter's. My daughter's headphones. This mic that I, like, plugged into several adapters to get into my laptop.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Preston, before was like. He's two minutes away. I know. You know where David is? He's in the green room at the comedy Fort. Best club in the country. I've moved it up. It's number one one. How about that NBA Jam? Right before we walk on stage, let's party.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Number one club in northern Colorado. That is us.

[Gareth Reynolds]

No, no, no, no. Don't you dare. Don't you dare.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

All right. We can include southern Wyoming.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Thank you. Yeah. Where there's no club, as if memory serves.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Right. Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

What an honor.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

And most of Montana, I guess.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. No, it really is. It's weird.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

We'll just keep. You have to go pretty far north to hit another comedy club.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It's pretty smart.

[David Rodriguez]

Billings.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. You know, if you headline at that company club, they give you top billings. Come on.

[David Rodriguez]

It's.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

No.

[David Rodriguez]

In the county, the health department.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Feel the glare. All right. Okay.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. No, no. That was painful to go through. No doubt.

[David Rodriguez]

In the county, the health department regulation governing the burning of trash states that this must be done between 2 and 4pm that's great rule.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Why daylight? Get it when everyone's out there, it's just so weird.

[MacKenzie (GoFundMe story narrator)]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It's the right time.

[David Rodriguez]

Why do you want everyone burning at once?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Well, you know, get it over with. It's like a band aid.

[David Rodriguez]

It's just like smog.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It's like a wet bandaid.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah. Dumb.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah. The time of day when the most children are on the dangerous playground.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, that's right. When the kids are getting dropped out. Yes. You want to heat the rocks, heat the area. Kids are going down slides because they're gonna be helping.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

This is, this is the 50s. They're probably the ones that are gonna get that done. That's part of their chores.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, well, children are God's filters. So I think get it, get that, get that bad air in the kids and then get the good air, you know, out.

[David Rodriguez]

How does it come out of them? Huh? How does it come out of them?

[Gareth Reynolds]

True to mouth,

[David Rodriguez]

private contractors will pick up trash outside the city for a dollar or two a month. But some householders prefer to burn it.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Wow.

[David Rodriguez]

Perhaps the hours for burning are responsible for night after night. The suburban air is thick with smoke from these scenarios.

[Gareth Reynolds]

There's no connection. There is no connection betwixt the two. Science has spoken.

[David Rodriguez]

When there is no wind, this does not blow away for hours. Perhaps the county authorities should change the time.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It's so funny for somebody to be like, the issues, the hours.

[David Rodriguez]

I mean, it is not great to have everyone do it at the same time. But also like, no, there's, there's a bigger issue.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And peak afternoon.

[David Rodriguez]

What about hauling it off? That's a.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That costs a dollar.

[David Rodriguez]

And then dumping it somewhere, that'll become a serious problem.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Or two. Yeah, or two. I don't know what the difference is. This is pretty soaking. That's going to be $2. Why are you guys wet in your trash so much? You're like the hottest city in America.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

It's dry. And so it costs more because they got to, they got to soak it themselves.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Well, it's really wet when I hold it. And then they go, well, it's a really dry trash. And you're like, yeah, it's all the misters and the misses. Oh, sweet baby Dave. Listen, you know how news is. We're basically a news show and it's overwhelming. Okay, but this is different. News is non stop. It's. It's coming at you all the time. You know, it's like living in this day and age.

[David Rodriguez]

I do. I live here one hour.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You're talking about One thing. The next hour, you've completely forgotten about that thing because your brain cannot catch up.

[David Rodriguez]

You know, we need Gareth.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Say it.

[David Rodriguez]

A podcast.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yes.

[David Rodriguez]

That is not panic inducing. It slows things down.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yes.

[David Rodriguez]

I'm talking about Stateside with Kai and Carter.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That's exactly what I was going to say.

[David Rodriguez]

It's a Guardian podcast.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Stateside with Kai and Carter airs three times per week because there's always something to discuss. Kai and Carter get access to the Guardians resources in the US and reporters around the world. And David, they deliver the most relevant information right to you.

[David Rodriguez]

We should say it's journalists Kai Wright and Carter Sherman, but we're talking global

[Gareth Reynolds]

content across news, international coverage, climate, culture, sports, lifestyle, fashion, wellness. And they're not billionaire owned over there at the Guardian, Dave, which is something you and I can get behind.

[David Rodriguez]

I like that. So Kai and Carter wrestle with all the questions we have. What's going on in the world? So listen wherever you get your podcasts or watch on YouTube. Stateside with Kai and Carter.

[Commercial Announcer]

Dish has been connecting communities like yours for the last 45 years, providing the TV you love at a price you can trust. Watch live sports news and the latest movies, plus your favorite streaming apps, all in one place. Switch the Dish today and lock in the lowest price in satellite TV, starting at $89.99 a month with our two year price guarantee. Call 888-D dish or visit dish.com today.

[MacKenzie (GoFundMe story narrator)]

My name's MacKenzie and I started a GoFundMe for the adoptive mother of a nonverbal autistic child. The mother had lost her job because she wasn't able to find adequate care for this autistic child. So she really needed some help with living expenses, paying some back bills. So I launched a GoFundMe to help support them during this crisis. And we raised about $10,000 within just a couple of months. I think that the surprising thing was by telling a clear story and just like really being very clear about what we needed, we had some really generous donations from people who were really moved by the situation that this family was struggling with.

[David Rodriguez]

GoFundMe is the world's number one fundraising platform, trusted by over 200 million people. Start your GoFundMe today at gofundme.com that's

[Gareth Reynolds]

gofundme.com gofundme.com this podcast is supported by GoFundMe.

[David Rodriguez]

Rooney's third spouse calls quits. Granted.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Tough.

[David Rodriguez]

This is a story from Hollywood, of course, Mickey Rooney's third.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Oh, is this. Oh, this is a different newspaper still third wife.

[Gareth Reynolds]

He was the. He was tiny, wasn't he?

[David Rodriguez]

Like a dick. I can't remember. I feel like.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Didn't he do the original Nutty professor, which is the, like, most racist?

[David Rodriguez]

Oh, no, he. He definitely did a movie where he had, like, Asian eyes.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. And he. And the tea. It's real bad.

[David Rodriguez]

It's real bad.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Real bad.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And then, like, on set he was like, nobody's ever gonna care about this. Right. And everyone's like, mickey, baby, it's gold. This is gonna age phenomenally.

[David Rodriguez]

Do you remember he. He played the guy with down syndrome in another movie?

[Gareth Reynolds]

No. What?

[David Rodriguez]

I think. I think he was the OG Go for a big award by playing someone with downs. Oh, God, yeah. Yeah, he did. I think his name. I think the character. I think the movie's name was Bill, and he was the titles somehow. Downs. Yeah. Pretty cool.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Stop saying downs, calling it down.

[David Rodriguez]

Is that because you're a right wing comedian? You want me to use the R word? Just throw it around, Dave.

[Gareth Reynolds]

David, where you run a phenomenal club. Where do you stand on the R word? I know you'. Pro. By the way, I'm looking at the poster for Bill.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yep. Thanks for having me on. I do have to. It's not liable for any sort of David metadata.

[Gareth Reynolds]

David, how's your podcast Kill David going? I'm looking at the poster for Bill, and it's war crime.

[David Rodriguez]

Explain it.

[Gareth Reynolds]

A war.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

A war which was still fresh in the world's mind at the time.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That's right. Yeah. So it's a different time. And I. To be clear, I said award crime. I mean, this thing deserved them all.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Oh, there we go.

[Gareth Reynolds]

No, it's just. You could tell what's happening and.

[David Rodriguez]

Go ahead, explain that more.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I'm not. I'm not gonna fall into your little weird trap.

[Commercial Announcer]

Why?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Because I don't want to talk like

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

it was a different time. Be like. Yeah, it was. It was different. It was a much worse time.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, it was. Yes. Yeah.

[David Rodriguez]

Are his eyes like Sydney Sweeney's?

[Gareth Reynolds]

His eyes like Sydney Sweeney's. What's that?

[David Rodriguez]

I'm saying she's got a look about her.

[Gareth Reynolds]

What are you talking about?

[David Rodriguez]

Mickey Rooney's third happened. I think I know. What? If you put together what I said, it's pretty obvious. This is.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

This is all about American Eagle.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, Always is.

[David Rodriguez]

Mickey Rooney's third wife, actress Martha Vickers. You can't marry someone named Vickers.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Sure you can.

[David Rodriguez]

It's crazy.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Let's have a look at her.

[David Rodriguez]

Got a divorce Monday from the pint sized actor. On Testimony. Pint size actor.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, she was just beautiful.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

There you go.

[David Rodriguez]

Was beautiful.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Vickers was beautiful.

[David Rodriguez]

From the pint sized actor on Testimony. He spent most of their married life away from home. I don't think I saw him more than one or two nights a week. Ms. Vickers told the judge, that's a benefit. Then he would just walk back into the house like nothing had happened and ask for his dinner. Oh, well, yeah, he's a bro. Like, this is what this is. This is like the ultimate 50s relationship.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Well, it was probably like, it was probably like he was probably hanging out. He was hanging out with Sinatra every now and then and he was like, that's how we do it. I was like, look, you're kind of tiny and strange. You don't get this.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

He's Mad Men in his home life.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Which, which by the way, when you watch an episode of Mad Men, you're like, ah, man, it must have been nice to be in an era with no conscience.

[David Rodriguez]

Oh, she was hot.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. Jesus, relax over there. Yeah, she's dead.

[David Rodriguez]

Doesn't matter to me.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Jesus.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Mickey Rooney is only allowed to burn his ex wives from 2 to 4.

[David Rodriguez]

The 25 year old actress described Rooney as having a very bad temper when anyone disagreed with him.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I love tiny guys with bad tempers. Like, remember Bagel Boss?

[David Rodriguez]

What the just happened, David?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Come on. Remember Bagel Boss? Little guy in a bagel shop and iPhone was like, what? He was. He just had major bait. He like was in a bagel shop and someone like filmed him

[David Rodriguez]

video.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. And then he was like that. He was like in a celebrity boxing match. He went through. It was like he was the. He had like the Hawk to a trajectory without the podcast. He had a year where you were like, man, Bagel Boss is everywhere now. You're like, you hear Bagel bus in an asylum. He's not doing too good.

[David Rodriguez]

We were like, she's gone, isn't she?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Who?

[David Rodriguez]

The Hawk tour.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah.

[David Rodriguez]

So after the. Oh yeah, crypto thing happened, she just vanished.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

That was a true 15 minutes.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Like, I was. It was, it was.

[David Rodriguez]

Honestly, I hope she made a lot of money. And then.

[Gareth Reynolds]

She didn't.

[David Rodriguez]

She didn't, no.

[Gareth Reynolds]

But she's friends with Whitney Cummings and you can't put a price tag on that.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Somebody, somebody made money off of her and then that is. Oh yeah, it.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh yeah. There was. Yeah, there's some guy named Dragon who was like, that was awesome. I sucked her soul and now I have another boat. I was like, cool, dude. This woman is literally. You've Taken everything out of her.

[David Rodriguez]

I mean they really used her up and spit her out.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It's. It was tough to watch.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

While it was even happening cuz she

[David Rodriguez]

seemed like a nice person.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah. What noise did they make when they spit her out do you think?

[Gareth Reynolds]

I mean that would, that would be the reporter and at the end of the day is she was hawk to it. Andy Kilborn Channel 9 Ann Arbor.

[David Rodriguez]

Rooney did not contest the divorce and previously had entered into a property agreement which the court approved under the terms of the settlement Ms. Vickers will see received 2000amonth in alimony pretty good scaling down to 300amonth by 1959 so 8 years so it's going to scale down. That's not that great.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah but that's great eight years.

[David Rodriguez]

I mean they probably weren't married that long because. Yeah, because he's, he can't be that old.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Seems insufferable.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah he seems insufferable. Yeah he seems like a nightmare. The little actor I love, I love.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

I can't, can't expect him to have a good mood. He's taking shots from the press even in the little headlights they, they called him a pint size. I'd be pissed.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It actually it, it makes you kind of maybe have an insight into why he was like into appropriation because he was just like. Yeah you're supposed to just make fun of whatever someone looks like like the media and everyone is just like the little squirrel boy the chipmunk of a man. A lot of us didn't realize Rooney had a penis until his third wife.

[David Rodriguez]

He was, he was five foot one, five foot two.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Five foot two, that's bagel boss size

[David Rodriguez]

but he was a leading man from 30, 39 to 41. That's a bagel.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

That's just a bagel bite.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That is a bagel bite.

[David Rodriguez]

Apparently it, his height made it difficult for him to land traditional adult leading roles. Oh really?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah.

[David Rodriguez]

No who would have thought.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

He couldn't, he couldn't just do the like Stallone where like Stallone when he was filming like Judge Dread and stuff apparently he was like standing on milk crates to, to do like the face to face like they would just go from shoulder up.

[David Rodriguez]

He was.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That's so funny.

[David Rodriguez]

I didn't know he was that short.

[Gareth Reynolds]

There is a shot in LA Confidential I'll never forget where you see Danny DeVito very clearly step off an apple box like he's like talking to Kevin Spacey and then it looks like he sinks into the floor. You're just like, this was bage. Was the bagel boss. You don't remember him?

[David Rodriguez]

No, I've never seen that.

[Gareth Reynolds]

David. You probably can't see from there, but I'll.

[David Rodriguez]

The little actor also agreed to pay 150amonth support for their son, Ted Michael, 17 months old.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, they had a boy.

[David Rodriguez]

Ms. Vickers retained custody of the child.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay, well, there you go.

[David Rodriguez]

The actress and Rooney were married June 3, 1948, so it lasted two years. It's good.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It's good for Hollywood.

[David Rodriguez]

She must have already been pregnant.

[Gareth Reynolds]

We don't need. Don't show her.

[David Rodriguez]

Well, the marriage was marked by several separations and reconciliations before Ms. Vickers finally filed suit for divorce last June, charging Rooney with habitual cruelty and indifference. Rooney previously was.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Habitual indifference. I'm sorry, that cruelty. That's not okay. Habitual indifference is just disinterest, which I believe is legal.

[David Rodriguez]

That's probably why our podcast sounds.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

It sounds like she probably should have seen it coming. When they went to get married and he said no at the altar.

[Gareth Reynolds]

No.

[David Rodriguez]

Okay, wait. Rudy was previously married to Ava Gardner and beauty contest winner Betty Jane Reyes.

[Gareth Reynolds]

See, it just.

[David Rodriguez]

That is really weird. Insane. I mean, maybe he's got charm. He's probably funny.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Well, and you're famous.

[David Rodriguez]

Don't forget famous. You're famous. But Ava Gardner's famous, too.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

It was the 50s. He was one of, like, 12 famous people.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, that's. Seriously.

[David Rodriguez]

You're probably right. It's not that many.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, there really were. There were, like, three channels, nine famous people. They're like, he's one of them. He's the little one.

[David Rodriguez]

You forget just back in, like, the 90s, that there weren't this many famous people.

[Gareth Reynolds]

No, it's really. It's real weird. It's weird to have been in entertainment when the, like, the absolute shift like, this has happened.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Where now you've just got to sit in your home and be like, like, hey, you know what? I'm so sick of traffic jams.

[David Rodriguez]

I remember I was talking to my. My roommate in, like, honestly, like, 97 in New York, and he's an actor, and he was like, I want to be, like, a leading man. And I was like, dude, that's one of, like. That's, like 10 guys that you're talking about. What about just a working actor? He goes, no, I want to be a leading man. I'm like, it's literally 10 guys.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh. I fully believed when I moved out here. I mean, I'd been in theater school, and I was like. Like, I'M very good. I was, I moved to LA and I was like, I actually think I'm gonna pass. And like, my agent was like, what? I was like, that's not the kind of career I want to have. They're like, bro, you're doing kids birthday parties. You might want to lower your standards a little.

[David Rodriguez]

I was the opposite. When I heard, when my manager was like, I. I talked to him about roles and he goes, no. He goes, we're only putting out as a leading man. And I was like, why?

[Gareth Reynolds]

That was.

[David Rodriguez]

I don't want to do that.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That's what I needed.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah. Okay. This is a letter to the editor. The people speak the dirty weed.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Hell yeah.

[David Rodriguez]

If we want to stop marijuana dope traffic via the cigarette, we must first become aware that the tobacco smoking habit leads to it and all other habits.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Maybe one more time, just to be

[David Rodriguez]

clear the thesis, Slippery slope from cigarettes.

[Gareth Reynolds]

He's saying we've got to be careful with cigarettes because they lead to weed.

[David Rodriguez]

Yes.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Okay.

[David Rodriguez]

Before me, now I have a. Is POTS legal in Colorado, right?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, yeah. Are you first state? Oh, yeah. Really? Yeah. Right?

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah, I feel like.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, but Colorado was the first state. And I'll tell you what, the. There you can really. You could do DMT intravenously in Colorado now. Which fellas, I can tell by two blank stairs that we're. We're into not doing that. But for guys like me, that is. Giddy up.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Oh, I mean, I'm. I'm on it right now.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That's David. That explains I took so long for you to get the bike set up. It's like, David will be here in a minute. He's really. He's in a DMT hole right now.

[David Rodriguez]

You're on the 24 hour DMT drip thing, right?

[Gareth Reynolds]

I would love a DMT drip.

[David Rodriguez]

I bet you'll be a little bit too much, I would say, by your reaction.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. You ever done dmt?

[David Rodriguez]

No, I'm good.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You don't get it. Don't get it. Thank you.

[David Rodriguez]

I haven't done heroin either.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Thank you. Well, I smoked it in high school. Thank you.

[David Rodriguez]

You ever smoke crack?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yep, one time. Thank you.

[David Rodriguez]

Did you?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, one time I took two hits

[David Rodriguez]

every.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Everybody's done it one time.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It's.

[David Rodriguez]

You need college.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You need to take two hits of crack to be like, yeah, I don't like this as much as you guys do.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah, you take one hit to go. That's a bit much. Yeah, it' bit much.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I'd rather coke.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Everybody's had a weird neighbor In Denver that you party with a little too hard, and then they're like, smoke this. Smoked out of. This is a weird weed pipe. It's a. You know, it's a light bulb, and, like, you go for it, and then you feel a little weird, and then, light bulb.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Now, you know, you did the light bulb move.

[David Rodriguez]

That's what happened.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Good for you. Went full. You guys went full.

[David Rodriguez]

No, I was in San Luis Obispo, and we were all partying with this guy that I should not have been partying with. He's like, you know, you should try this. I was like, what is he? Like, it's crack.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It was a. It was a light bulb.

[David Rodriguez]

I mean, that's what the pipe looks like.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, yeah. And then the guy. The guy on the hills playing guitar for you again.

[David Rodriguez]

That's right. Then there's a guy playing.

[Gareth Reynolds]

No, See, I would say the worst part of two hits of crack is watching the other people around you on crack. That's when you're like, this is not for me.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah, we're not good.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, they're just like, more crack. You're like. It feels like you guys are really. This is like a dense timeline that I'm not digging.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah, that one tobacco. Because that's what it leads to.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It was the one to back.

[David Rodriguez]

Started with that one.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Tobacco starts with burning, wet trash, Then you're smoking cigarettes, then weed. Then your neighbor in Colorado, you're smoking crack out of a light bulb.

[David Rodriguez]

Before me now, I have a clipping from the Saturday Evening Post of a big company cigarette ad. There is a photograph of a baby, mind you, and below that, a drawing of a woman smoking a cigarette. The caption in big letters before the baby's photograph, quote, before you scold me, mom, maybe you better light up a so and so cigarette.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That is a wild ad, I think we can all agree. A wild ad.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

I mean, that's what I was gonna say. This guy's. This guy coming against. You know, rallying against tobacco is already a scorching hot take for the time, because this is still, like, they thought it was good for you. Like. Yeah, they were 50s.

[David Rodriguez]

They did, yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Which was. Well. But internally in the tobacco agencies, they were like, oh, God. Oh, God, people's lungs are black. And then publicly, they were like, I can't do anything without my chest afield.

[David Rodriguez]

Did either one of you have parents that smoked?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yes.

[David Rodriguez]

Do you remember walking into the room and there would just be a thick layer of smoke in the room?

[Gareth Reynolds]

I'm not gonna lie. My mother picked Smoking back up again from me. So it was kind of a weird one.

[David Rodriguez]

That's how my desk are doing. Crack again.

[Gareth Reynolds]

No, we. When I was like 13 or 14, we all kind of decided. My brother, my mother and I decided we were all basically smoking cigarettes and we were just gonna smoke in the house. And it became pretty weird.

[David Rodriguez]

You're the most white trash Wisconsin people ever.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, it was full on wood paneling. Sitting in there, just heaving cigarettes down, sharing ashtrays off each other.

[David Rodriguez]

That's insane.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It was pretty awesome.

[David Rodriguez]

No, but you would walk into a room of someone who smoked and they would just literally be, you know, on the top half would just be cigarette smoke.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah.

[David Rodriguez]

Pretty cool. It was another example we hear from a juvenile office these words that he sees nothing wrong with a young boy or girl smoking. Another scene, a group of officials in the city judge's office sentencing several boys and girls under 21 for drinking intoxicating beverages and. And unconcernedly setting a wonderful example of temperance by puffing away at big cigars and dangling cigarettes.

[Gareth Reynolds]

This. This person is making great points. Outside of the weed thing.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah, it's really crazy. This is all about cigarettes.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah. With some tight pros as well.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely. These are tight spirals.

[David Rodriguez]

Another incident. A priest taking a last puff from his cigarette and tossing it out of the door before he walks up to the platform of a high school auditorium to give a sermon.

[Gareth Reynolds]

The way that is. I would love. That's. That to me is. That's like. You see that in a movie script. You're like, I want to see this scene.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I like my parents.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

That's a Robert Rodriguez moment there.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, right. Exactly.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah.

[David Rodriguez]

Teachers and preachers.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It's got a gun under it. You know the deal.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah, I do. Teachers and preachers smoking. Mothers.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Teachers and preachers.

[David Rodriguez]

Mothers smoking before their children and holding their babies in their arms. Father smoking up milk and grocery money.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Did you get any milk? No.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Smoking them.

[David Rodriguez]

I got five.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Grocery money is what we call smoking. Crack smoking.

[David Rodriguez]

I got 19 cards of cigarettes.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Smoking that milk and grocery money with your neighbor Delano.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Delano smoking milk and grocery money.

[David Rodriguez]

Children smoking on their way to grammar school. Doctors coming to make their house visits. Wreaking of stale tobacco. Surgeons. But I dread speak of their addiction.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Everything he's saying is crazy.

[David Rodriguez]

It's crazy. Turn the pages of our popular woman's magazines. Ads depicting children with school books under their arms smoking cigarettes. Ads showing beautiful women smoking. But it never tells the truth in these ads. Namely that it makes them Stink. That's true.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Completely.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

The, the, the. Did you smoke, David? Yeah, yeah.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

I smoked like, a pack and a half a day for 10 years.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. I was big into it. And you. When you quit and you actually start to get the smell of the other smokers that you used to go out with, you're like, oh, my God. Well, I guess you don't know when you, I mean, are doing it.

[David Rodriguez]

I don't know. I don't remember when most clubs made it illegal, but, like, coming back from a comedy club back in the day, your. You would. Your clothes, you would almost have to take off outside. Oh, yeah, they smell like smoke.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And then.

[David Rodriguez]

And then when I started, like, going on the road, the road, I would go to places where they still allowed smoking. You'd be like, jesus Christ. Like, I loved it. Unbelievable how horrible it was.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Did you smoke?

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Oh, man. The last time I was in New York, I had a spot at the stand, like, upstairs and downstairs. They were doing a Legion of Skanks show, like a live pod. And they do, like, man on the street stuff. And they were all smoking, like, Diana's, like, downstairs, this tiny little thing. I was like, whoa. It was a.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Like, they smoke a lot on that show, though. They really do.

[David Rodriguez]

They do.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. Oh, yeah. They like, they. I don't know. They. I, I still. In my head, I still go, I could do it, but I. There's no way. I used to love. I love cigarettes. And by the way.

[David Rodriguez]

Oh, we went to. Where was it? Denmark. We went into that bar and they still love smoking. Do you remember that?

[Gareth Reynolds]

I don't. We got so hammered in. Is that the hammered night?

[David Rodriguez]

It's Copenhagen.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah. We went into a bar. Well, first we went to a nice restaurant.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Lovely restaurant.

[David Rodriguez]

Smoking in the restaurant.

[Gareth Reynolds]

David. We went. When we. You checked into this hotel in Copenhagen, they had a bar, like, you checked in, and they'd offer you beer.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah, they had a tap.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And we were like, oh, my God, this is incredible. And. And then Dave's room wasn't ready, so we sat there, drank for a little while. They told us it was open 24 hours, and that is just all bad. It was like, I knew already. This is not good information for me to. Already.

[David Rodriguez]

It wasn't.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay, so. But then we went to a bar. I don't remember this.

[David Rodriguez]

We went to eat, and then we went to a bar. And it was just like a normal little. Not like anything fancy, just a little, like, dive. And we walked in and we're. It was just a wall of smoke. And they're like, yeah, it's freedom here. We still smoke. And I was just like, jesus Christ.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It is the best. That is the best city.

[David Rodriguez]

It really is the best. Truly. If I could live anywhere. Oh, Copenhagen.

[Gareth Reynolds]

My friend, maybe 10 years ago, got offered to be, like, a sommelier in Copenhagen. Oh. And he did.

[David Rodriguez]

And I was like, you didn't take it?

[Gareth Reynolds]

I was like, you. You go. Do you understand? I was like, you go, yeah. It's like how you're trying to get, like, a dog to run away from you into the woods for a better life.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah. Especially since he knew nothing about wine,

[Gareth Reynolds]

which is really weird. But. But then he didn't. And then, like, every, like, two years, he's like, that was really. That was bad. I was like, buddy, the. Were you doing?

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah, that was terrible.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Get over there.

[David Rodriguez]

Yes, we have become callous. No wonder. The dope habit.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I know we talked a lot in between, but I'm starting to get bored with this guy.

[David Rodriguez]

Coolidge Mother. It's signed Coolidge Mother.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

How much did he have to pay for, like, five pages in this newspaper?

[David Rodriguez]

It's pretty crazy. It's. It's. She really. She really thought about this for a long time.

[Gareth Reynolds]

She was going on and on.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah. She. She ran it past all of her friends.

[Gareth Reynolds]

She's right. But again, she really just.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

It.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Word economy,

[David Rodriguez]

Total support. Has asked for Israel bonds. This guy. This doesn't go well.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Next article. No comment.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, I think we. We. We don't talk publicly on our thoughts on that on this show.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Okay.

[David Rodriguez]

I'm actually going to pass on that.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Preston. I love that Preston decided to put a mine in there. This.

[David Rodriguez]

Wow. 500 million Israel independence bonds issue. Okay.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. And this is 51.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

So this is right after.

[David Rodriguez]

I can't remember when Israel was established. When did they move into the place where people were living?

[Gareth Reynolds]

48.

[David Rodriguez]

It was 48.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Something like that. Yeah.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And then I've done that, though.

[David Rodriguez]

You've moved in a place where people live?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, my last apartment. That was what I did. They were like, excuse me. I was like, this is beautiful.

[David Rodriguez]

Get out. And then acted like no one was there. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay, fine.

[David Rodriguez]

David, I'm not hearing anything from you.

[Gareth Reynolds]

He's having mic issues, for God's sake. He's talking

[David Rodriguez]

school principal beating. Trial opens in Cleveland.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Well, cool. I'm glad we went to a fun story.

[David Rodriguez]

How. How. Guess.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Did he do the beating or was he beaten? Let's see.

[David Rodriguez]

Oh, that's a good question.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Boy, I'll tell it Is strange how back then.

[David Rodriguez]

Then,

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

back then, almost certainly he was doing the beating, I would say, you know, but now. Now video is a kid just wailing on a teacher.

[Gareth Reynolds]

But how. I mean, I'll tell you there. If I could beat up one of my principals. Oh, the joy.

[David Rodriguez]

You should be able to pop one teacher.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You know what they should do? At the end of every year, a principal should have to fight one student to remain principal for the next year.

[David Rodriguez]

That's right. Right.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That's. That's right.

[David Rodriguez]

When I was in sixth grade, it was still legal for teachers to hit kids.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It's crazy.

[David Rodriguez]

And I had a teacher who put a. He would put a ring on his knuckle and he'd walk, and he hit us on the top of the head.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That's crazy.

[David Rodriguez]

Pretty cool. Pretty cool stuff we used to deal with.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Jesus. Dave's 78.

[David Rodriguez]

I'm 78. Or maybe it wasn't legal and he just did it, but I don't know.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Like, legal? Yeah. I don't know if it was legal, but they were. It like. Well, there's nothing.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Just walking around punching kids, being like, get back to burning the trash.

[David Rodriguez]

A jury of eight women. This is a Cleveland story. A jury of eight women and four men heard witness test testify Monday. He found junior high school principal James Fenwick, 55, with his face swollen and bleeding.

[Gareth Reynolds]

The kid beat him by a p.

[David Rodriguez]

With a paddle by the mother of a pupil.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, that's.

[David Rodriguez]

This is. This is. This is not what we expected.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That's great. Talk about a scene from a movie.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

A paddle to the face.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Well, she, like, the kid comes home and his. His tushy's all red from getting paddled all day, and she's like, that.

[David Rodriguez]

I'm for it. I'm totally.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I agree.

[David Rodriguez]

Like, let's. Let's get this done.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I agree.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

And he's fallen. She came back with, like, a cricket bat.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. It is like. Those paddles are brutal, Dave. Weren't they. You were around when they were invented.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah, we. Oh, yeah, we used to give them to her. We used to. I have to go in.

[Gareth Reynolds]

In.

[David Rodriguez]

In the morning and give the teacher our paddle, and then he would paddle us.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, okay.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah. So. But you. We each had our own paddle to give to the teacher.

[Gareth Reynolds]

My teacher asked me to paddle him, but not too hard. Unless.

[David Rodriguez]

Was this after school?

[Gareth Reynolds]

After school, during lunch. Tons of times. But it was a different time. I mean, like we were saying, it was different. You're. Yeah, you kind of. Your teacher was.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Subscribers only, though.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. Oh, that's totally. Yeah. No, that was. That was like the early. Only fans. But no, you'd start with light paddling and then juicy, and then you'd hit a little harder. Go ahead.

[David Rodriguez]

Dave Fenwick, who made 100. Fenwick. Oh, my God. California officially banned carpal punishment hitting, paddling or spanging Students. Guess.

[Gareth Reynolds]

81.

[David Rodriguez]

86.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Wow.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Crazy.

[David Rodriguez]

That is insane.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Well, they. My mother's stories are in like. She was just like. You'd get, you know, she be, well, if you didn't do your numbers right, you'd get your lashes. Be like, what.

[David Rodriguez]

I mean, that. That was. And California, I would assume is on the forefront as opposed to other. I wonder if you can still do it. I bet there's some states you can

[Gareth Reynolds]

still hit a guarantee. Arkansas, 100%.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Oh, yeah. Cleveland. Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Cleveland. Cleveland probably held onto that still.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Or at least under.

[David Rodriguez]

Ramaswamy Fenwick, who weighs 145 pound, charges that Miss. Mrs. Bernice May, 37, 135 pounds. Beat him about and head with a heavy wooden paddle last June after he had given her son Daniel, 14, a swift kick in the hall of Albert Bushnell Hart Junior High School for pushing another student. Now, let me just say something about this.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Go ahead, do it. Into camera, please.

[David Rodriguez]

He's. My guess is he's a decent guy because.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Wow.

[David Rodriguez]

Wow. Let me. Because you're weird. He didn't pop her back. And that's what the story is. The story is now, today, I think if a woman started hitting a man, he would punch her. And like, like, you. Like, if there's a video of a woman attacking a man, I don't think he'd. He'd just be like, all right. What? Don't. Don't. He. He'd hit.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Maybe. Maybe. I mean, we all remember Jersey Shore when Snooki got hit.

[David Rodriguez]

So I don't remember that. Yeah, the. My biggest memory of. Of Jersey Shore, The.

[Gareth Reynolds]

The smush room. He. Every time he. We stay in hotels, he calls his room the smush room.

[David Rodriguez]

No, it's when one of the guys was leaving. I don't remember which one. It wasn't Paul. Paulie. It might have been Paul.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Situation.

[David Rodriguez]

Situation. He's leaving and he looks at Snooki

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

or the other one.

[David Rodriguez]

Or the other one.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, the.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

No, Ronnie the Situation or whoever the other one was.

[David Rodriguez]

The other one.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Ronnie. Ronnie who was like, yo, I don't have any discernible characteristics. I'm.

[David Rodriguez]

I'm not interesting. I'm not interested.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

No. To his wife on the altar.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, but he Thought it meant. Yes. He didn't understand. His brain is tiny. These people.

[David Rodriguez]

The situation was leaving and he was mad at Snooki. And he said, you're a dirty little hamster. And I was like, oh, wow. That is a beautiful. It's beautiful.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It was a hell of a show.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah, it really was.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It was a cultural touch point.

[David Rodriguez]

It really was.

[Gareth Reynolds]

There's.

[David Rodriguez]

With them.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yes. One of the beauties of staying in hotels is. Is still the ability to channel surf.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah, right.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You'll just go, what? And it'll be like Santa Fe, Jersey Shore, the big dinner. And you're like, what is still getting together. Their faces are just. I mean, they truly are starting surgery. Oh, my God. Like, their plastic surgeon must have done improv.

[David Rodriguez]

And I just remember seeing. There was like a Snooki restaurant at one point. I was like, what is happening?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, my God.

[David Rodriguez]

What is happening out there? It was a crazy show because they were oddities. It was like. Yeah, like they were just.

[Gareth Reynolds]

To you and your ivory tower.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

David and I knew about those sort of people.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

It was a simpler time when they could pitch a show. They could pitch a show that it was like. It's like the real world, but even less structure somehow.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh. And they were like.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

It was like with louder people.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, exactly. It was like. It's a. They are really, like, pretty annoying and strange. And we were like, whoa, what oddities. I suppose we'll watch that. Don't worry.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

You won't be able to look away. Yeah, we'll watch seven seasons. Of course.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Hey, what if that becomes everything? Is that cool?

[David Rodriguez]

Okay, so now I have to admonish Preston. Preston, if you're going to cut out the articles, you should actually, you know, go all the way to the end so I can read all the words instead of cutting it.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You know, Preston is in our lives because of David. David. So this is. I. In a way, this kind of falls at David's door.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

My apologies.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, yeah. It was the first time when I. When I was in the green Met President, I heard someone talking about his claim to fame. David. I mean, you may as well. I don't know if everyone knows, but a lot of people know.

[David Rodriguez]

It's upsetting. Go ahead.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

The posting. Whole story. Is that what we're talking about?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, whole posting.

[David Rodriguez]

What else would it be?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, yeah. How did that.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

What else would it be be?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, Preston was in the green room, and I heard someone saying, preston seems like a very normal man. And then someone said something about when he posted whole on Twitter. And I Was like, packing up my stuff. And I was like, what was that? And they're like, yeah, Preston, I'm sorry, what? On twitter,

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

It was even response to.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I remember. I remember what it was. It was that he said, this is so dumb.

[David Rodriguez]

If Denver won.

[Gareth Reynolds]

If the Nuggets won the championship, he was going to post hole.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Oh, yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And my guess is it got like, four likes. But he was like, a contract's a contract. And he did it at the sports bar. He went into the sports bar bathroom. He couldn't wait to get home. You know, kind of powder it up a little bit. He went lighting.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Better lighting in the. In the dive bar bathroom room.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Maybe. I listen, I've seen the picture. I. I think less light is better.

[David Rodriguez]

And a woman married him and loves him.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I don't know if she loves him.

[David Rodriguez]

Okay, that's fair.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I don't believe she loves.

[David Rodriguez]

Wedding of convenience.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. She wanted to say no, but it was. They convinced her to say yes.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Aggressive indifference or whatever the term was.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, right, exactly. That's what she experienced.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Most of us, prolapse difference.

[Gareth Reynolds]

She had what we call a prolapse in judgment.

[David Rodriguez]

First witness. First witness. Following selection of the jury Monday was E.J. furlong, 72, a custodian of the school at the time of the reported attack. He said he saw Ms. May in the principal's office the day of the alleged attack, sitting with an umbrella and a paddle in her lap.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Awesome. Awesome. Look. Oh, my God. God.

[David Rodriguez]

He said he had never seen the paddle before. Furlong testified that he later found Fenwick in the hall, his face swollen and discolored and blood running out of his mouth.

[Gareth Reynolds]

It'd be great if she, like, beat him so badly she put the umbrella out so that blood didn't get on her outfit. Like a protective shield.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah, she's putting I to the rain poncho on for the splash zone.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. She's like, if Dexter meets Gallagher.

[David Rodriguez]

Boy, do I get this, though, having a kid?

[Gareth Reynolds]

What?

[David Rodriguez]

Because my kid had a coach who was last year, a total dick to him, and I always wanted to, like, be a. He would, like, publicly, you know, yell at the kids and stuff. And so I always wanted to be a dick to him and then just be like, what? You know what? Just take my advice and. I don't know, you can get mad or be better. You can try to be better. Like, because that's what they always say to the kids.

[Gareth Reynolds]

That's what he'd say.

[David Rodriguez]

That's. He said, you know, you can get mad or you can try to better yourself and be a better player. So why can't you say the same thing?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Well, Dave, you don't. But you don't attack them to their face. You. You slowly. Dave's like a gas leak. Just. The guys are like, yeah, that guy's kind of looking at me weird. And then it's like all of a sudden, I'm getting a lot of weird emails. Someone put a penis on my car overnight.

[David Rodriguez]

There's a. There's always. Look, if I don't like you and you're in an important position in my life, there's a campaign being waged behind your back that you don't know about.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Crazy thing to hear. While I'm sitting, my wagon is hitched to you. And I. I just. The things you just said are super trouble,

[David Rodriguez]

but, you know, I get rid of people. He told me a woman had him. He told me a woman had hit him with a paddle. And I saw Ms. May sitting in his office. Ms. May's attorney, Lewis Fernberg, said his defense would be that she did not attack Fenwick, but mainly defended herself when he attempted to seize her by the throat. Okay, well, that's a different story. Yeah, but also, she did roll in with a pad.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, but also him.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah, no, him. Yeah, I agree.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah. But either way, they're both dead now.

[David Rodriguez]

Are they?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah.

[David Rodriguez]

You don't know that.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I do.

[David Rodriguez]

Buried uranium.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, man. Again, it. It. Feel the order. It's like put together like a vision board. It's the. This is a very big deal. Oh, my God.

[David Rodriguez]

Three young boys.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, no.

[David Rodriguez]

They look like 13ish.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, no.

[David Rodriguez]

These three dalert Texas boys found a chunk of uranium buried under a tree while playing.

[Gareth Reynolds]

These kids are dead now.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

They're obviously 13.

[David Rodriguez]

12 and 13.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah. That's really crazy. How old they were when they died too, Probably.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Hold on to that picture. You're gonna need it in two editions.

[David Rodriguez]

So insane.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Jesus Christ. The Chernobyl 3. Oh, no.

[David Rodriguez]

New blackout is clamped on uranium find.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Can you imagine, like, your kid coming back and explaining to you what it was playing and you're like. Wait, what was it? Like a glowing rock. My hands hurt. My bones are making noise. Oh, my God.

[David Rodriguez]

Well, there goes a tooth.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oopsie daisy. My jaw fell off.

[David Rodriguez]

FBI and Atomic Energy Commission officials slapped a security blackout Sunday on the discovery of pure. On pure processed uranium near a main highway leading east from New Mexico atom bomb proving grounds.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, my God.

[David Rodriguez]

Wow. An Atomic Energy Commission officially confirmed that a 33 pound cylinder.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, my God.

[David Rodriguez]

By three boys in this Texas panhandle town was uranium.

[Gareth Reynolds]

What town is it?

[David Rodriguez]

Dalhart. D A L H A R T. No one would comment. However, about a 64 pound chunk reported later found in a scrap heap. Both chunks appear to be alike, however. Authorities were trying to solve the mystery of how the rare metal used. Well, yeah, somebody dumped it used in making atomic bombs. Got to Dart in west Texas near the Mexico border, but more than 100 miles from the A bomb permit grounds. I can tell you what happened. What A guy was supposed to take it and dump it somewhere secure and he just wanted to go home, so he just tossed it out wherever he was.

[Gareth Reynolds]

I'm more curious how soon the boys died after this.

[David Rodriguez]

That's cool.

[Gareth Reynolds]

You.

[David Rodriguez]

You look that up because that's fun. The two cake shaped cylinders were under tight guard while scientists examined them to determine their exact composition and possible value in atom bomb manufacturing. The three boys now Don Monroe, Jodelle golden, and Walton Fowler, found the 33 pound cylinder three months ago. They played with it until their elders made them turn it over to authorities because it gave off dangerous sparks when handled rough. Roughly. Oh, my God.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay.

[David Rodriguez]

Oh my God.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Now did you know about this?

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

That in 19 kick the can with this 33 pound drum?

[Gareth Reynolds]

It's like their feet are flying off while they're kicking it. Yay. Oh, my friend. Now this is the main. There was a 1951 child's toy that was basically a metal detector, but for finding uranium.

[David Rodriguez]

What?

[Gareth Reynolds]

So, so they were like. Kids would go out to try to find uranium. Uranium.

[David Rodriguez]

What?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yes.

[David Rodriguez]

What in the. Is happening? What in the. What in the.

[Gareth Reynolds]

So they were just. So these kids were probably like, we, we won.

[David Rodriguez]

Oh my God. Oh, for sake. Yeah, I can't imagine that they didn't have serious.

[Gareth Reynolds]

No, no, you can't be tossing around uranium.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

I mean, we, we had a. We had a crazy like, story about that type of thing. I grew up on Catalina Island. I think we've talked about that before. Before.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Y.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

But in like the, in like the 80s, there was like a. A small plane crashed on the backside of the island and a group of, you know, like firefighters and guys from the island, like, drove out to check it out. And like, as they got there, helicopter comes over from the mainland with a bunch of like, government people in like hazmat suits. And like, they're like, we got it. You're good. Go home. Like, we got. And they like cleaned it up and, and everybody that went out to that site, like within 10 to 15 years had died of like, cancer that appeared. That was like not in their family.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Like, oh my God. That's the thing. They, that's what always. That's, that's what they do. They just basically like, you're good to go.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah.

[Gareth Reynolds]

And they're like, we need to move. We have 10 years to get as far away from these people as humanly possible.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Yeah.

[David Rodriguez]

Last one.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Okay.

[David Rodriguez]

The light feminine touch. Eric Johnson, 52, is convinced that women are not the weaker sex.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, wow. This is shocking for the time Johnson

[David Rodriguez]

reported to police that he was sitting on a bus stop bench when three women approached him and began an argument as women do. Oh my God, here come the arguers. Can I just sit on this bench?

[Gareth Reynolds]

Here we go out. Yeah.

[David Rodriguez]

He said they pinned him to the ground. Okay. This is way, this is way beyond arguing.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, yeah.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

The, the pint sized Johnson said they had

[David Rodriguez]

took off one of his shoes, hit him on the head with it. Ah, he sounds like a rooney.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, yeah.

[David Rodriguez]

And took $3 from his pocket. Then they threw his shoe high into the weeds and he couldn't find it.

[Gareth Reynolds]

These women are awesome. I love a roving woman, gang.

[David Rodriguez]

He was taken to Jackson Memorial. Emergency treatment of a gash on the forehead from a shoe. Yeah, he told officers he felt his

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

shoes were made of uranium.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah,

[David Rodriguez]

he told officers he felt his nose fell off. A lucky little because. A little lucky because they missed $5 hidden in another pocket.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Hey, doctor. They didn't know I had five put up my ass.

[David Rodriguez]

Excuse me.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Well, good lord. David. David, thank you for joining us. It seems like Phoenix was a real hotbed of. At least a lot of good news came to Phoenix. So that's exciting.

[David Rodriguez]

Yeah, that's very exciting.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Any thoughts, David? Any. We're at the end of the paper in the podcast. Any lessons learned? Go ahead.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

I mean that was just. It was a nice glimpse into the equivalent of scrolling 70 years ago.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Very, very true.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Instead of just watching a little, you know, instead of watching a video of three women pinning a man down, beating him over the head with his own shoe like I will probably do after this is over. You read it.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

And that's.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Well, as we call it now a Waffle house.

[David Rodriguez]

Yes.

[Gareth Reynolds]

No, that is very true. It is very much just like our doom scrolling. At least you used to have to read. And now you're like, I can't watch something that's three minutes.

[David Rodriguez]

This is crazy.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

This is the same thing about, you know, watching just a forward facing. Just of somebody complaining about something that someone's doing. It's like, oh, now we, we, we read a six page article about

[Gareth Reynolds]

just. And you could tell society's gotten better. Well, thank you, the great David Rodriguez. I mean, I cannot say enough people should go to the Comedy Fort in Fort Collins. Every, every show is a banger of a comedy comedian and. Thank you, David. I'll see you soon in person when I have my own back. Yeah, not long at all now.

[David Rodriguez]

Don't have that.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Yeah, he will have me back. I'm in the books.

[Guest or Co-host (possibly a female participant)]

Go yourself.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Thank you, David.