Podcast
The Estranged Heart
Hosted by The Estranged Heart · EN
Support and community for navigating the emotional storms of parent and adult child estrangement and repairing and transforming relationships with one another in healthy and productive ways.
43episodes
Episodes
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EP247: The Wave Has Parts - sadness in estrangement
Apr 1200:38:11Tap to summarizeMost estranged mothers are moving through their pain as one undifferentiated wave of awful - with no map, no language, and no way to name what's actually inside it. In this episode of The Estranged Heart podcast, Kreed breaks the wave apart. She walks through nine distinct layers that live inside estrangement pain and makes the case that naming each layer isn't wallowing. It's excavation. Because you cannot work with a pain you cannot see the parts of. You can only survive it. And surviving isn't the same as healing.Key TopicsWhy "estrangement" is a container - not a map - and what's actually inside itThe critical difference between shame and guilt, and why it changes everything about the workThe seven layers of fear and how they affect the futureThe role of hope and how to make it consciousUnseen grief and the importance of social witnessResources & SupportFacebook Support Group (facilitated by Kreed) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroupOne-on-One ServicesPrivate coachingConsultingMediation servicesConnect with Kreed:Website: theestrangedheart.comEmail: hello@theestrangedheart.comSupport the work: Buy Me a Coffee (donation platform)Disclaimer: Kreed Revere is not a licensed therapist. Nothing in this podcast should be considered or taken as therapy. If you need therapeutic support, please seek out a therapist near you.
Transcribe →EP246: Is It Really A Double Standard?
Apr 800:32:09Tap to summarizeShow NotesWhen a therapist posted about the "engagement asymmetry" in estrangement content - noting that posts about what parents did wrong go viral while content about adult children's responsibility goes quiet - it sparked a conversation worth having carefully. In this episode of The Estranged Heart podcast, Kreed unpacks why that asymmetry exists, what it's actually telling us, and why the "both sides" framing, however well-intentioned, can quietly close the very doors we're hoping to open. This is an episode about developmental power, the sequence of healing, and what it actually means to lead with love when leading feels like the hardest thing you've ever been asked to do.Key TopicsWhy estrangement content that names the adult child's experience spreads and what that hunger is really telling usThe difference between both/and thinking and the symmetry trapDevelopmental power: what a parent holds that a peer does notThe distinct types of estrangement and why treating them as one category does real harmEcho chambers on both sides: what happens when pain finds community but not growthThe sequence of healing and why it almost always needs to start with the parentWhat "leading with love" actually looks like and why it isn't surrenderWhat every reconciliation Kreed has witnessed has had in commonTime stamps00:00 — Introduction and Context of Estrangement02:48 — The Asymmetry of Engagement in Estrangement Discussions06:09 — Understanding Responsibility in Parent-Child Relationships08:55 — Different Types of Estrangement11:59 — The Echo Chamber Effect in Estrangement Narratives14:47 — The Role of Parents in Healing and Reconciliation17:58 — Final Thoughts on Healing and LoveResourcesFacebook Support Group (facilitated by Kreed) https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroupOne-on-One ServicesPrivate coachingConsultingMediation servicesWebsite: theestrangedheart.comEmail: hello@theestrangedheart.comSupport the work: Buy Me a Coffee (donation based) https://buymeacoffee.com/kreedrevereDisclaimer: Kreed Revere is not a licensed therapist. Nothing in this podcast should be considered or taken as therapy. If you need therapeutic support, please seek out a therapist near you.
Transcribe →EP245: What Estrangement & Easter Have In Common - a non-religious Easter message
Apr 500:36:14Tap to summarizeIn this episode of The Estranged Heart podcast, Kreed explores the meaning of resurrection in the context of estrangement, this episode offers profound insights on transformation, healing, and the power of inner change beyond reconciliation.Key Topics- Difference between restoration and resurrection- The death and transformation process in estrangement- The role of honesty and vulnerability in healing- The importance of sitting with discomfort- Building capacity for love without conditionsChapters00:00 Introduction to Estrangement and Holidays05:13 Understanding Resurrection vs. Restoration08:08 The Process of Transformation18:18 Navigating the In-Between: The Saturday25:09 The True Meaning of Resurrection33:27 Embracing Change and Personal Growth35:01 TEH-outro.mp3Resources & SupportFacebook Support Group (facilitated by Kreed) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroupOne-on-One ServicesPrivate coachingConsultingMediation servicesConnect with Kreed:Website: theestrangedheart.comEmail: hello@theestrangedheart.comSupport the work: Buy Me a Coffee (donation platform)Disclaimer: Kreed Revere is not a licensed therapist. Nothing in this podcast should be considered or taken as therapy. If you need therapeutic support, please seek out a therapist near you.
Transcribe →EP244: Her Story, Her Words, Her Healing - Part 3B
Mar 3001:07:26Tap to summarizeIn this episode of The Estranged Heart, the final installment of a four-part series, Kreed concludes 5her discussion with an estranged adult daughter. Jen shares her profound journey through estrangement and healing. Discover how she navigated complex family dynamics, set boundaries, and found peace through therapy and self-work.00:00 Navigating Estrangement: A Personal Journey00:27 The Impact of Family Dynamics on Relationships05:48 Emotional Needs and Parental Expectations06:34 Seeking Understanding and Connection07:02 Navigating Parental Relationships and Isolation10:39 The Challenge of Healing Generational Wounds12:56 The Impact of COVID-19 on Family Dynamics14:44 Confronting Inconsistencies in Family Behavior17:08 Thanksgiving and Christmas: A Test of Relationships20:12 The Strain of Estrangement and Seeking Therapy26:43 The Consequences of Silence in Family Relationships33:30 Navigating Estrangement and Family Dynamics37:15 The Journey of Self-Discovery and Healing46:54 Facing Family Milestones with Confidence52:06 Coping with Disinheritance and Moving ForwardResources & SupportFacebook Support Group (facilitated by Kreed) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroupOne-on-One ServicesPrivate coachingConsultingMediation servicesConnect with Kreed:Website: theestrangedheart.comEmail: hello@theestrangedheart.comSupport the work: Buy Me a Coffee (donation platform)Disclaimer: Kreed Revere is not a licensed therapist. Nothing in this podcast should be considered or taken as therapy. If you need therapeutic support, please seek out a therapist near you.
Transcribe →EP243: (The Bridge) Her Story, Her Words, Her Healing - part 3A
Mar 3000:31:51Tap to summarizeContent note: This episode contains discussions of sexual assault, suicide, pregnancy loss, and emotional neglect. Please take care of yourself first.This bridge episode of The Estranged Heart exists to correct an editorial error. Portions of Jen's story that were edited out of earlier episodes are restored here exactly as they were meant to be heard. Kreed opens with a direct public acknowledgment to Jen and to listeners, taking full accountability for content warnings that pointed to material that never made it to air.What follows is Jen's unfiltered account of her teenage years: the chaos and instability that followed her parents' divorce, being labeled as "too sensitive" and "overdramatic" by her mother, and turning to substances and a peer group that accepted her when home did not. Jen survived a sexual assault, a mother who was present in the practical sense but absent in every emotional one. That same year brought a pregnancy and miscarriage handled in a cold emergency room, and a mother who told her to "just get over it." Later, a young man Jen cared for died by suicide, and she carried that loss entirely alone because experience had already taught her there was no safe place to bring it home.Kreed weaves in reflection on the difference between big-T and little-t trauma, the role of emotional attunement in building resilience, what happens to a child's nervous system when chaos becomes the baseline, and how her father's eventual accountability - "you're right, I was wrong, I'm sorry" - became the quiet anchor Jen needed to survive her adolescence.KEY TAKEAWAYS- When a parent cannot or will not show up emotionally, a child will find belonging wherever they can and survival-based belonging has its own cost.- An unregulated nervous system in childhood doesn't disappear. It follows you into adulthood, into your marriage, and into how you parent your own children.- Accountability without explanation can be more healing than any amount of reasoning or justification.If you or someone you know is having a difficult time, free support is available. Call or text 988.Resources & SupportFacebook Support Group (facilitated by Kreed) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroupOne-on-One ServicesPrivate coachingConsultingMediation servicesConnect with Kreed:Website: theestrangedheart.comEmail: hello@theestrangedheart.comSupport the work: Buy Me a Coffee (donation platform)Disclaimer: Kreed Revere is not a licensed therapist. Nothing in this podcast should be considered or taken as therapy. If you need therapeutic support, please seek out a therapist near you.
Transcribe →EP242: Her Story, Her Words, Her Healing - part II of III
Mar 2500:42:46Tap to summarizeIn this episode of The Estranged Heart podcast, Kreed interviews an estranged adult child. This interview (part two of a three part series) explores the journey of healing from family estrangement, the impact of childhood trauma, and the transformative power of self-awareness and intentional parenting. The guest shares personal stories and insights on breaking patterns, fostering peace, and creating ripple effects of love and understanding.Resources & SupportFacebook Support Group (facilitated by Kreed) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroupOne-on-One ServicesPrivate coachingConsultingMediation servicesConnect with Kreed:Website: theestrangedheart.comEmail: hello@theestrangedheart.comSupport the work: Buy Me a Coffee (donation platform)Disclaimer: Kreed Revere is not a licensed therapist. Nothing in this podcast should be considered or taken as therapy. If you need therapeutic support, please seek out a therapist near you.
Transcribe →EP241: Her Story, Her Words, Her Healing - part I of III
Mar 2200:48:53Tap to summarizeOn this episode of The Estranged Heart podcast, Kreed interviews an estranged adult daughter. This interview explores the journey of healing from family estrangement, the impact of childhood trauma, and the transformative power of self-awareness and intentional parenting. The guest shares personal stories and insights on breaking patterns, fostering peace, and creating ripple effects of love and understanding.Resources & SupportFacebook Support Group (facilitated by Kreed) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroupOne-on-One ServicesPrivate coachingConsultingMediation servicesConnect with Kreed:Website: theestrangedheart.comEmail: hello@theestrangedheart.comSupport the work: Buy Me a Coffee (donation platform)Disclaimer: Kreed Revere is not a licensed therapist. Nothing in this podcast should be considered or taken as therapy. If you need therapeutic support, please seek out a therapist near you.
Transcribe →EP240: Dignity, Distance & the Myth of the Perfect Return
Feb 2500:17:46Tap to summarizeIn this conversation on The Estranged Heart, Kreed explores the complex dynamics of estrangement and reconciliation between parents and their adult children. She emphasizes the importance of self-respect and emotional growth for parents who often find themselves in a cycle of chasing their estranged children. The discussion highlights the need for parents to stop pursuing their children out of desperation and instead focus on their own lives, allowing space for healing and potential reconnection. Kreed also distinguishes between reunion and reconciliation, stressing that true healing involves more than just physical proximity; it requires emotional safety and the courage to engage in difficult conversations.TakeawaysMany parents chase their adult children out of love and fear.Healing cannot be tethered to the hope of reunion.Reunion is about proximity; reconciliation is about emotional safety.Love involves being open to difficult conversations, not just waiting. Facebook Support Group (facilitated by Kreed) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroupOne-on-One ServicesPrivate coachingConsultingMediation servicesConnect with Kreed:Website: theestrangedheart.comEmail: hello@theestrangedheart.comSupport the work: Buy Me a Coffee (donation platform)Disclaimer: Kreed is not a licensed therapist. Nothing in this podcast should be considered or taken as therapy. If you need therapeutic support, please seek out a therapist near you.
Transcribe →EP239: Obedience As Safety
Feb 2200:07:03Tap to summarizeIn this Sacred Sunday reflection of The Estranged Heart, Kreed explores how many of us learned early that obedience meant safety. Kreed gently examines the difference between obedience and integrity, and how the nervous system can equate assertion with danger. If you struggle to identify your own preferences, over-explain, apologize prematurely, or say yes while feeling resentment later, this conversation will likely resonate. This is not an episode about dismantling obedience. It is about examining its cost.Resources & SupportFacebook Support Group (facilitated by Kreed) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroupOne-on-One ServicesPrivate coachingConsultingMediation servicesConnect with Kreed:Website: theestrangedheart.comEmail: hello@theestrangedheart.comSupport the work: Buy Me a Coffee (donation platform)Disclaimer: Kreed is not a licensed therapist. Nothing in this podcast should be considered or taken as therapy. If you need therapeutic support, please seek out a therapist near you.
Transcribe →EP238: Oprah, Estrangement, and the Questions No One Asked
Feb 1800:29:22Tap to summarizeWhen Oprah Winfrey released her podcast episode “When Families Cut Ties” on Thanksgiving, it ignited intense reactions across estranged parents, estranged adult children, therapists, and social media communities. Some felt validated. Others felt blamed, minimized, or misunderstood.In this episode of The Estranged Heart Podcast, estrangement coach and relational mediator Kreed Revere takes a thoughtful, trauma-informed, middle-ground approach - neither defending nor attacking the episode, but asking the deeper questions that largely went unasked.Rather than choosing sides, Kreed examines:why estrangement conversations collapse into defensiveness and moral certaintyhow culture, trauma, nervous systems, and power dynamics shape family cut-offswhy behavior is often misinterpreted as fixed personality or intentand how the absence of curiosity keeps families stuck in cycles of painThis episode is for estranged parents, estranged adult children, therapists, and anyone seeking healing over echo chambers.Estrangement is not a trend. It’s a relational signalValidation without resourcing keeps people stuckTrauma-informed work requires curiosity, not certaintyHealing demands accountability without shameKreed Revere is a relational midwife who specializes in parent and adult child estrangement, reconciliation and mediation support. She is also the host of The Estranged Heart Podcast. Having lived estrangement as both an adult child and a parent - and facilitated over 65 reconciliations - Kreed’s work centers on capacity-building, trauma literacy, and moving families beyond blame toward meaningful repair.Resources & SupportFacebook Support Group (facilitated by Kreed) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroupOne-on-One ServicesPrivate coachingConsultingMediation servicesConnect with Kreed:Website: theestrangedheart.comEmail: hello@theestrangedheart.comSupport the work: Buy Me a Coffee (donation platform)Disclaimer: Kreed Revere is not a licensed therapist. Nothing in this podcast should be considered or taken as therapy. If you need therapeutic support, please seek out a therapist near you.
Transcribe →