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We often think of habits as actions that we take and things that we do. But there is such a thing as thought habits. We've been thinking the way that we think for so long, it is often a habit to think this way. And these thought habits actually impact us and our lives more than anything, because thoughts drive all action. So what I'm sharing with you today has the potential to easily make you a more positive, resilient, and successful person. It will open you up to a whole new world of possibility. In fact, I am certain that if you don't learn one single new thing this entire year, but even just one of the three new thought habits I'm about to share with you in this video, it will be enough to change your life forever in a major way. Because when you change your mind, you change your life. Hi, it's Hillary. Welcome to the Hillary Silver Podcast. Thanks for tuning into the conversation today. If you haven't already, it would mean so much to me if you'd take a minute to just click that five star rating on your podcast app, leave a review and subscribe so you never miss one of my episodes. And if you're enjoying this podcast, please consider sharing it with a friend because if you like it, they will probably like it too. And if you're really committed to yourself, sign up for my newest programs. I'm super excited to share them with you. They're called Self Devoted, Self satisfied, and Self Made. They are super simple and right to the point, covering everything from health and fitness to your relationships and to money. You can sign up for one or you can bundle them all at hillarysilver.com shop over the course of the last 10 years, since I set out to launch and then grow my online company, I have undergone a dramatic personal transformation. I really am not the same person that I was 10 years ago. In in a good way, I've let go of things that no longer serve me. Whether it was something that I believed about myself or a behavior pattern I had, or even a few of the relationships that were in my life that just weren't good for me. I've reprogrammed and rewired my brain to think new things. And in so doing, I have become a more positive, empowered, liberated, and unstoppable me. I am happier, less bothered, I'm more optimistic, and I'm at peace with myself. I have a deep inner contentment with myself that I've never had before. And I've become a tremendous leader, something that I never really thought of myself, ever. And that's not just in my business, with my team or my clients as we typical typically think of leadership, but in all areas of my life, with my family, with my friends, in my community, and most importantly with myself. I am fully self led, trusting myself to lead me through my life. This feels so amazing and I want that for you. Which is why I'm sharing three high vibe thought habits that I know are responsible for this growth that I have experienced. So let me say this first. Whenever we are cultivating a new habit in our lives, it starts with a decision or first hearing of something new, right? So we decide that we want to be healthier. So we really work on creating better health habits like working out or meal planning to eat better or you learn of a new scientific breakthrough. So you want to start incorporating this new thing into your life. It starts with that kind of idea. You don't just do this action one time, you do it many times until it becomes something that you do automatically. It becomes integrated into your life in a seamless way. It becomes a new way of being or moving in the world. That is how we form habits. For me personally, I don't wake up in the morning and think about whether I'm going to work out or not. It's not something I negotiate with myself. I just go every day. And in kind of simple terms, it's thinking about brushing your teeth. You don't wake up in the morning and decide if you're going to brush your teeth. You just do. It's a habit. So when I first heard of each of these ideas, which all came at separate times, I was instantly intrigued and adopted them immediately. For me, it was a yes right away, almost like the fog cleared and I could see my path clearly for the first time. But like other habits, it's not a one time action or a single moment of thinking. It's many moments. Repetition is what creates mastery. That is how you incorporate new habits into your life. Doing it again and again and thinking it a new way over and over until it becomes your new way of thinking and being in the world. So the first high vibe thought habit that I adopted is the rule of the Golden Nugget. Have you heard of it? It means that you operate in life believing this. No matter what, there is always something valuable to gain from every experience. Even if it's just one positive thing. That single nugget can be totally life chang changing. So for example, if you sign up for an experience, go to a party, go on a trip, or you invest in some kind of education or program and all of it ended up being a disappointment when just not being what you hoped it would be. Except that you did get one thing out of it that actually made a big positive impact on you and left a lasting impression. There was one takeaway that moved the needle even by one degree, then it was all worth it. The one golden nugget takeaway that you got from an otherwise flop is actually all you really needed. So therefore the entire thing was worth it. So if you go to a party and the food was gross and the venue wasn't inspiring and the music was kind of a bummer, but you met someone really cool and you had a great conversation, even if you never speak to that person again, that genuine authentic connection that you felt in those few moments talking to that person made the entire experience worthwhile. That conversation was your golden nugget of the entire party experience that was an overall flop in general. I'm 52 now, so my undergrad years were a very long time ago, but I was a cultural anthropology major and four years of classes and all the expense and all of that that goes into getting a college degree. I really don't remember too much of what I learned, but I took one class that complet changed my life even though at the time I didn't realize it. And guess what that class was called? It was called Loving Relationships. That my multi eight figure company is called Ready for Love and we are dedicated to helping women feel worthy and capable of creating healthy loving relationships really is nothing short of miraculous. That class is my golden nugget of my entire undergrad experience. And when women sign up for the Ready for Love program it is an investment in themselves. Even if we only teach them one thing that opens them up to the kind of love that they want. Even if they only learn to stop people pleasing or they quiet the tough inner critic of perfectionism that they have had their entire lives. Or if she only just learns to trust herself when selecting a partner. Or that she overcomes this feeling fear of intimacy and being vulnerable so she can let someone in. Even if it's just one thing, it is worth the investment times 100. So here is why this is so high vibe and so very profound. First it shifts your focus from what you didn't get to what you did get. You complain less and are more easily satisfied and this makes you a more positive and high vibe person. Complaining is so low vibe and it just brings you down emotionally. And second, it encourages you to take risks without the fear of failure. If you won't Sign up for things or try new things, or invest in new things. Because what if it doesn't work? Or what if there's no guarantee? Or what if anything then you will miss out on so much in life. But if you believe in the rule of the golden nugget and know that even if you only get one powerful thing out of this experience, it will be worth it, then you become less risk averse and you really become truly fearless. Okay, so the second thought habit is to celebrate every day. Essentially what this means is that instead of waiting for the big milestones to celebrate, you train yourself to find the wins in everyday small moments. It's really an amazing way to practice gratitude. When I was first building my company, I was part of a math mastermind experience and I connected with lots of other women who were on the same path for their companies. And I, I selected a couple of them, a couple of women and every morning we messaged each other with what we were celebrating. Even when the struggle was real, there was always something to celebrate. The growth that I was undergoing that felt so hard and was truly testing me was something that I would celebrate. This kept me in a high vibe state. Even when there were some real challeng to deal with or things weren't yet as I wanted them to be. I began doing this at dinner time with my family too. That is truly how life changing it is. To teach my kids to think this way from an early age can alter the trajectory of their life completely. So here is why this is high vibe and why it's important. First, it rewires your brain over time. Doing this every day literally trains your brain to focus on what's going well. Even during tough times, you see growth happening in small increments. Personal growth can be really hard to measure, but when you are intentionally looking for the small incremental improvements you can notice and mark them as wins. And second, you are able to sustain working on your goals longer. Because even if the big end goal and result that you're trying so hard to achieve has not yet been met, you don't lose hope or momentum. Because when you can mark the growth along the way and notice the small things that have that really may have gone unnoticed, you are winning each day along the way. And those small wins do mean a lot. You end up building resilience and it feeds you so that you are sustained rather than delaying your gratification and going hungry. If you're only celebrating the big wins when you've crossed that final finish line or you've achieved that big large goal that you're working on, you're going to be in a state of deprivation. If you can't acknowledge your growth along the way and mark the small incremental progress and changes, you will be starved. So celebrating every day the small wins and the and the things that might have gone unnoticed along the way sustains you. It keeps you fed. You're not starving until you get to the end. Right? Does that make sense? Okay. The third high vibe thought habit I've fully integrated into my life is this. Everything always works out in my favor. This mindset is about releasing control and completely believing and trusting that whatever happens will ultimately benefit me. The outcome or result of any situation, investment, relationship, opportunity or risk that I take will always work out in my favor. I'm always better for it, even if it's not obvious at the time. So didn't get the promotion that you wanted? That's okay. Okay. Because while you may be disappointed, you know that it's because something better is coming. If a relationship ends, it may cause sadness or heartbreak, sure, but you fully trust and believe that it's a gift in some way and it's clearing space for something better for you. Something healthier and more aligned. When I fall short of a business goal or something doesn't quite work out the way I intended, I choose to believe it means I'm just not ready for that big win yet. That I have work to do on myself so that I can become a more advanced version of me, one who is capable of receiving that which I desire. This is more than everything happens for a reason. Okay. That's just a simple platitude. It's a deep inner faith that everything always works out for you in the end. And believing that what is just around the corner that you may not be able to see yet is all for your benefit. It's faith, basically. And people have faith and believe in many things. Why not choose to believe this something that provides the ultimate in certainty, empowerment and reassurance. It is so good for your well being to incorporate this thought habit into your life and allow it to guide you in your life. And so here's why this one matters so much. It completely frees you from fear and anxiety about outcomes which you can't control. And it provides a sense of comfort in the unknown. It helps you see setbacks or disappointments as opportunities for growth. It builds your resistance and you gain confidence in your ability to handle anything that life throws your way. This is totally game changing because you become immune, impervious to setbacks and instead everything is an opportunity for you. Everything. So when you find yourself facing a disappointment or a setback, remind yourself this. This is happening for me, not to me. Look for the lesson, blessing or opportunity in every situation and be grateful for the opportunity to grow. It can sound like this. Thank you universe for showing me this thing about myself that I didn't realize so I can take care of myself and learn something new. Thank you universe for this shitty thing because now I know something even better is coming my way. Thank you ex boyfriend for breaking up with me because I would have stayed way too long in this unfulfilling relationship. Thank you difficult child for testing me so I can grow my capacity for patience and helping me grow as a human and to become my best self. So pick one of these high vibe thoughts and make it a new thought habit and just see how incredibly life changing it really is. And don't forget to check out the Self Centered Bundle my programs to help you be your best self in 2025. The link is in the show notes or in the pinned comments at the top. Until then, thanks for being here and I'll see you next time.