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The JTrain Podcast
Cheap Friends, Bad Dogs, and Instagram Politics - TICKED OFF TUESDAY - The JTrain Podcast w Jared Freid
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Jared Freed
I know you're angry. It's Tuesday and it has no feel. The weekend was fun. You're still hungover from the eating and next weekend is too far away. What will you do with your day? It's time to get ticked off. Complain with your gripe. Right now, your friend Uncle J Train is here to tell you that you're right. It's a ticked off Tuesday. Ticked off Tuesday. You're angry and you don't even know why. Enjoy this podcast. It'll help you get to Friday. Hello and welcome to the J Train Podcast. This is J Train Jared Freed coming alive from Montreal, Canada. That's right, Montreal, Quebec. Oh, Canada. My home native, Blur. I can't stop singing the Canadian national anthem. And it's like one of those songs that I'm like delusional about that I think I sing well. Ooh. Like, I think I sing one note of it well. The rest, I mean, I don't know the words. I know that it gets repetitive. We stand on God for the. I think they do that a bunch. It's a good anthem. I don't know. Every time I'm here. Can't stop with that anthem. It is a ticked off Tuesday. Are you angry? Do you have a complaint? Bring it to Ticked off Tuesday. And I'm gonna be honest with you. The Patreon subscribers are using their membership in all its glory. They are. They're getting their money's worth because I got four complaints here and they're all from Patreon. So if you want your complaint heard, if you want to be complained with by me, a complaint duet, join the Patreon because they get first dibs. Patreon.com JaredFried patreon.com Jared Freed if they don't use it, then we go to the mailbag. You can send in your complaint. Jtrain podcastmail.com youm can also DM it to the Jtrain Instagram account. @jtrain podcast on Instagram, we want you to follow that Instagram account. That's the premise here. If you're new here, if you're listening, because maybe you saw my Instagram story. Here's what we do. People write in with their complaints. You can complain about anything you want. Anything. I built ticked off Tuesday for you. Where any complaint can get heard. There's nothing too luxurious. No one can look at you and say, no, no, no. That's no, no. Well, there's bigger problems. There's no bigger problems. It is your problem and it shall be heard. Heard. So that is the premise. Here, here's a, here's a couple announcements before we get started. One, I want you to go to my YouTube channel. I just put up. I v. The producer. Our producer v. Just put up on my YouTube because I don't know how to do it. I think it's a 15 minute clip from Portland, Oregon. We're putting up longer clips. I'm taping every show. Yeah, I'm, I'm, I'm spending real dollars. You know, I've done this before. I'm not, I'm not, I'm not one to not invest. I'm an investor. I was putting money into the studio and trying to do a studio show for J Train. That didn't really work. Okay, well, where do those dollars go now? They're going towards YouTube. They're going towards building the channel and putting up more stand up there. So what I want you to do is go subscribe to my YouTube channel. Just search Jared Freed in YouTube. And every Saturday is a new, longer video from a place that I was at in the country. And I think it's kind of cool. You get to like step into the room for a second. You can see what it's like during these kind of odd moments. I mean, like, this is the life of a traveling comedian. You go to a town, you kind of, you know, you make some, you know, you make some observations about the town, you talk to the crowd. Especially a comedy club. Like I'm in Montreal right now and I'm doing a, the a theater. And that's a different thing. Fun, still fun. But you got to have a theater show to put in a theater. The comedy club is where you kind of work on that show to put in a theater. So there's like these little, you know, odd moments. There's, you can hear the wait staff. It's just, I, I think it, there's something great about it. I like it. And you know, I get that Michelle Wolf, who I opened for, for a good year on the road, she loves being in a comedy club and working on jokes and figuring out what the punchlines are, what the stories are that you're gonna tell the, the set, so to speak. And I think she got that cuz she opened for like Louis CK and Chris Rock. Like there, there, there's a line, there's a, there's a lineage here of comedians. You know, if you go straight to a theater, I don't really think you got a theater act. That's my opinion. That's, that's, that's, this Podcaster's opinion, this comedian's opinion. We're here on a ticked off Tuesday. Okay, so this is all to say go to the YouTube subscribe and in other announcements. I'm gonna be in Alpharetta, Georgia. I added a date. Yeah, I, I, I'm ins, I'm insatiable. Alpharetta, Georgia. And it's gonna happen before I go to go Down Under. So before I go to New Zealand and Australia, I'm going to be in Alpharetta, Georgia on Valentine's Day weekend. Jaredfree.com for tickets. So then, and if you're in Australia, New Zealand, I'm coming there too. So. Jaredfree.com for all that stuff. We have four complaints. I have my own complaints. We got two sponsors. That's our show. Ticked off Tuesday. I'll get to the listener complaints after my complaints. Before we get into anything else, listen up. This ain't the little tiny bowl, it's the Super Bowl. It's time to get in on the action at DraftKings Sportsbook, an official sports betting partner of Super Bowl 59. New DraftKings customers can bet $5 to get $200 in bonus bets instantly. So now's the best time to get started. Pop some popcorn, fry up some wings, and put your money where your mouth is. This year, I am a gambler. I love gambling on the game. It's coming up this week. I will have many bets going on the game. I've already bet. I'll tell you my bet. I bet Kansas City in the over. I put a, a hundred clams down on Kansas City in the over. So what does that mean? Can. At the time of the bet, Kansas City was giving 1 1/2 points to Philadelphia, so they were favored by 1 1/2. So Kansas City has to win by two or more. And then the over under. I don't have my phone in front of me. I think it was 48 and a half. So the combined score of the two teams has to be over 48 and a half. So even if you're not going to gamble, you can follow my bet and you can go, you know, at the end of the game and go, wow, Jared lost money or won money, you know, but that's the fun. I really do enjoy it. And I use DraftKings. And what they're saying, here's the deal. They're basically saying, put in five bucks. Use Jared's promo code. Yep, we got a promo code here, J Train. And we're gonna give you $200 in bonus bets. What does that mean? Well, you get to take those bonus bets, bet them however you'd like, and then they can turn. If you win, they turn into real money, real dollars in your pocket. So download the DraftKings Sportsbook app and press in code Jtrain. That's code Jtrain for new customers to get $200 in bonus bets instantly. When you bet just five bucks only on DraftKings Sportsbook, the crown is yours. Gambling problem, call 1-800-Gambler in New York, call 877-8-HOPE NY or text hopeny467-369 In Connecticut, help is available for problem gambling. Call 888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org Please play responsibly on behalf of Boot Hill Casino and Resort in Kansas. 21 plus. Age and eligibility varies by jurisdiction. Void. In Ontario, bonus bets expire 168 hours after issuance. For additional terms and responsible gaming resources, see dkng. That's our first of two sponsors. Here's my complaint. Two things happened. One, last night I had a drink after the shows I did at the Cellar. I'm sitting at the bar and this girl comes up to me and this is word for word what she said to me. And I don't know if you're going to be surprised by what the complaint is, but here's she comes up to me and she goes, are you. I want to get it right. Are you the. Are you the gay New Yorker guy on Instagram? That's what she said. And I'm like. And I looked at her, I go, one of those is true. And she's like, what? And it's like, listen, I don't care if someone thinks I'm gay. Good. Good for you. If you think I'm a New Yorker. I am not. I'm from Boston. But like, I've lived in New York for a lot of years. To some people, New Yorker is just like northeast. That's the same. It kind of the what? It goes one or the other. Are you on Instagram? The guy on Instagram. It's tough to be like, we're all on Instagram. The bothersome part to me is that's their takeaway from what I put out in the world that they didn't even get to comedian. They didn't even the idea this person will never come to a show. That's what got me so like my branding and I like putting up videos face to the camera. I but I, I every day another person does something similar to me is maybe Some a day that I might lose credibility. That was like my, I hate to go so deep on this, but it did bop. This happens all the time. You, you're the guy from Instagram and it's like, I, I understand how that starts, how, like how you get there. But she said three different things. Gay New Yorker, Instagram, like, you didn't even fumble into Netflix Special. You didn't even. And it's hard because they do say, you get what you put out, you get back what you put out. If you put out, stand up, all stand up, you will get a standup crowd. Maybe you won't get as big a crowd because I do believe stand up, stand up comedy is a niche art form. I don't, I think people say they like standup more than they actually like standup. I think they have to know the person, trust the person to go to their show. I think when you guys come to my show, I, I appreciate it. Like, and then my job is to put on a good enough show that you go, I actually do like standup when it's done right. I had a guy message me last night. Again, for every woman that comes up and says, are you, you know, the gay guy from, from Instagram, there's another guy who sends you a message. Or maybe, maybe he thought I was gay and he was hitting on me. But he was like, you were my first show, my first live stand up show. Well, I went in Nashville and it was an unbelievable time. I got the same, that message on the same night as this woman came up to me and. But it's, it is so frustrating. The idea that, like, p. You know, I, you know, when, if someone says Coca Cola, you think of Coca Cola. Like, I, that is, to me, that's the point of Instagram for me is a, it is a proof of concept. It is an ad for the live show. But there are some people that will never see it that way. Can't see it that way, don't see it that way. I just had a woman message me just now. She messaged me. She goes, I'm sorry, I don't follow you. And again, this complaint is about my, I'm complaining as much about me caring because listen, if they follow me, I, you know, there's, there's a concern of like, can I make. Am I making any money from this interaction where I'm, this is my business too. So the person who follows and goes, oh, that, that gay guy from New York who's on Instagram, at least they're following you. Know, I can get a branded post. I can get. There's something, there's an exchange there. I just got a message from another woman and she starts her message with like, I'm sorry, I don't follow you on Instagram. So she's messaging me on Instagram, knows how to find me, but that's not how I use the app, she said, and then goes into this long thing about like, where you can get lunch or that I like Mexican food, I don't know. And then at the end, she says, I'll see you at your show Saturday. And it's like, this is what now I'm complaining about me. Less about the woman, but because I go to her profile and I see who she's following and it's like, there's comedians there. It's not like, it's like a bunch of friends. I just saw like four comedians that I know. And it's like, how can I not take that personally? How could I sit here and go, oh, yeah, no, no, no, you like those people. But then you go, jared, Jared, Jared, I'm gonna. I'm calling myself out. You got what you wanted. She's coming to your show. She's more. She's at your show. And the woman who thinks you're Mario Cantone at the bar will never go to your show. And it's like, again, it all comes back to you in some way. You have to kind of like forget that you have to put. I have to put this aside. I have to let it go because both of the people are giving me what I want is. And what I want is to be a professional comedian, to live this life, to have this career. But it is so interesting that, like, your brain only goes to this negative spot. And I'm mad at my brain. I'm mad at me. I'm just like, let it go. The woman at the bar, I go, I'm one of those things. And she goes, okay. And then just left. So we didn't even finish the conversation. That's my first complaint. And listen, most complaints are about ourselves. You know, knowing again, I'm in. Ticked off Tuesday. I don't have to explain, but I hope you could understand that that complaint is as much about that I go that way. I hate that my brain goes that way, that I get insecure. I get to Montreal, I land. This is a few complaints in one. Why is it that whenever you fly internationally, there is this like six mile walk from the plane to customs? Why do the international flights have to park so far Away. I guess you could say the planes are bigger, but I was on a one hour flight from New York to Montreal. To me, the flight from New York to Montreal, the flight from New York to Toronto, there's no longer one hour flight in the world. It just, for some reason. Well, this is the reason. It exhausts you more. There's six mile walk. You have to go hiking after you've flown there. And this is not just Canada. This is every country I've ever been to. It is this like maze of a walk and hallways, and you're in this like glass chamber that you kind of feel like you're a hamster in a maze. And by the time you get to customs, you're like sweating. I'm in a jacket. I can't. I'm not even comfortable. They should say to you before the flight lands, like, hey, we're about to land. You better go to the bathroom now before your eight mile journey to customs. I get through customs and I get an Uber. No Lyft here. Which I'm a Lyft user because they have the thing with Delta where you get miles, you get double miles from the airport. But now Delta's switching from Lyft to Uber. So I'll be an Uber guy because I've given my life to Delta. I get. The Uber guy pulls up and he goes, hop in front. That's the first thing out of his mouth, hop in front. And I don't think anyone wants to sit in the front of an Uber. I just think there's not one person on earth who's like, happy to hear that. But when they say it to you right off the bat, that means they want that to happen. And you can't be like, no, no peasant. You, you're the driver and I am the passenger. Like, you would feel ridiculous. It's not like a limo driver. It's not like you're with your, you know, you know, with, with your butler. So when he says, get the front, I'm like. And I said to my go, you want me in the front? Like, I like, second, you know, I was just like, let me make sure here. I hope I didn't mishear you, because if I did mishear him and then I'm in the front, he's probably like, what the. This, this guy gets in the front in an Uber. I want to, like, look at my phone. I want to pinch the, the Google map. They're always pinching the Google map. So I get in the front and this guy couldn't have Been nicer. And I felt like such a piece of. He was so nice. He's from Albania. He's lived here since the war. He told me he, he loves Americans, loves America. He said, they, they say America saved his country. That's what he said to me. This is all. And then he goes into, I learned more. And again you have this thing of like, who wants to sit in the front? Then you sit in the front and you're like, what would I have been doing in the back anyways? Again, another complaint about me. Miserable fuck me. Like, what am I complaining about? That I wasn't on my phone. I would have been in the back looking at my phone, not looking out the window, not learning any about the city. He's like, he goes, where are you from? I said, boston. I'm a gay New Yorker to the, to some people, but I'm. I'm from Boston. And he goes, he goes, boston, love Boston. I love. He goes, we have a highway just like you. And I go, your highway goes under the Big Dig. And I knew what he meant. And he said, yeah, the whole highway is underneath the city here in Montreal. He then went into not liking that French is the main language. And it was interesting because he was saying he didn't like that French was held onto. And he does have a point. If when you get here, you're like, they really are clinging. This place is way more French than it has to be. It doesn't need to be. You're literally in a English speaking country. But they, you can tell there's an identity thing. He was saying. He, he said to me, he goes, it's an identity they want to have. They, they, they don't want to lose this. And then he was saying that it's attractive as a place for other French speaking places to move. So he's like, you get people from countries that speak French that will move here and it's like a draw for them. And I was like, that's a good thing. You get people to come here. And he was like, but it's exclusionary to me. Who, you know. He goes, but he's like, I've been here 30 years. What am I complaining about? It's not going to change. He, he was complaining in the nicest way you could complain. He wasn't like this damn French. It was, it was really an interesting take. I hadn't heard. Then he says, he goes, there's only four cities with history in North America. This is what he said. And I never thought of it. He goes, New York? No. He goes, boston, Montreal, Chicago, New Orleans. He goes, those are the only four cities in North America that have history. And I was like, what about New York? He goes, what is that? New York's a hundred years. He goes, the other ones, this is like real history. Like, you know. And I was, I take his point. I do think there's more history. But he has a point. A lot of cities are newish in the grand scheme of the world. So this is all to complain about. I don't want to sit in the front and then I sit in the front and I'm enjoying the conversation I have with the guys. So guess this one's about miserable fucking me. We have one more ad and then we will get to the listener complaints. 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Herobread makes sliced loaves, tortillas, bagels, dinner rolls, burger buns, and more. So no matter what's on the menu, they've got you covered. Make sure you keep an eye out for their monthly small batch drops of fav their 4 gram net car bagels and other new surprises coming all year. Herobred is offering 10, 10, 10% off your order. Go to Hero Co and use code J train at checkout. That's J train. H E R O co. All right, let's go to the listener complaints. You can send yours in j train podcast gmail.com, but these are Patreon subscriber complaints. They get first dibs if you sign up for patreon patreon.com Jared Freed Five bucks a month gets you first dibs on TikTok Tuesday. Also, coffee with J Train and I just did a whole one about dating and drinking. So if that's of interest to you, go check it out. TikTok Tuesday. Hotels that don't have smart TVs. It's 2025. I should be able to watch Netflix and not have to flip through commercials while I'm staying at a decent national chain hotel. I thought I had a solution to this when I decided to go buy a Roku while on the trip. But having to connect this thing to the hotel wif daily is a nightmare. Luxury lounge complaint for sure. But when I'm paying $140 a night, I'd like to better entertainment options than the local channels. I agree with you. We. This is like a classic analog to digital problem. Like, this is a millennial writing in. This isn't a boomer. This isn't a Gen Z. The Gen Z is on, you know, on their, like, Switch, you know, playing Nintendo. This is. I can feel the millennial in this email because we are caught between. In this world of like, I want the new, but I have the old. And this is annoying. And I listen. I stayed a lot of hotels. Most of the. Here's my problem. Even when they do have smart TVs, it's not easy to sign into your accounts. You have to remember passwords they don't have. None of it's intuitive, like Google. When Google is like, wondering if it's you, they're like, open up the Google app and tell us the number you see. And it's like, done. None of these TVs are as good as Google. And this is. This is like the same. And this complaint comes from. Once you fly, once you've flown private, you can't go back to first class. You can't unsee private flight. I can't unsee Google being very good at getting me into an account. So now I go to these smart TVs. They're not so smart. Can't get in password, redo the password. You know, Hulu. They have this whole thing of like, well, you're away from home. Like, can you. And you're like, well, if you do this one more time, we're gonna lock you out. That. That's like a Hulu thing. And I have this on the road at the clubs. It really annoys me at the clubs. When I go to a green room, they'll have, like, a smart TV that's hooked up to nothing. All I want in a green room is to have sports on. I just want a hum of ESPN on the tv. And it actually makes me mentally feel better. I feel good when I hear ESPN on the tv if there's just a game on. And if I don't get that game on, I'm just sitting there, like, miserable. And then they're like. And you go to these comedy clubs, and you're like, hey, do you. They're like, yeah, you can sign into your thing. And I was like, I don't want to sign into my Hulu on your tv. I have. Listen, at least at the hotels, you trust that they, like, wipe the system. A comedy club that, you know, seven other comedians are gonna watch on my account. You know, order porn or some shit. I don't. I don't even think you can do that. But I'm just saying it's annoying. This. None of it is intuitive. And your complaint, I can see it. We have the same complaint. These smart TVs have this promise that they're not really delivering on. And these hotels, they're promising for you to have a comfortable stay. And it's like, no, I've seen a smart tv. I have the accounts. Why aren't you making this easy on me? Ticked off Tuesday. Here's another listener complaint. If your dog is not chill, don't bring them with you to indoor restaurants, grocery stores, and other establishments they are generally not supposed to be in. It's absolutely not okay to have your Great Dane. That's a huge fucking dog. Great Dane barking loudly behind me while I'm trying to return something at a clothing store. I couldn't even hear what the cashier was saying. Are these dog owners actually that unaware or just inconsiderate? Signed, am I crazy about these dogs? Dogs? No, you're not crazy. You're not. It is something that bothers me every day. These. I'd compare dog owners to bicyclists because they have it always right. So if the dog does wrong, sorry, the dog, you know, they get. They get a little yippee or whatever it is they get. Oh, my. You know, they. When the dog does something bad, they blame it on the dog. When the dog's something good, it's on that. It's because they're a good owner. So which is it? Are you a bad owner or is that a bad dog? I'm gonna say you're a bad owner. And then if you get mad at the dog, Oh, I guess you're not a dog person. No, no, no, no, no. I'm not a bad owner person. I. I don't like bad dog owners. I love dogs. So they have this, like, jujitsu where it's never the dog person. It's always, you don't like dogs or. Or the dog was bad. It's never them. When the whole reason they got a dog was to cover up their insecurities and whatever fucked up shit they're going through, they wanted something that would love them no matter what, no matter how shitty they are. So the dog, they're still gonna go home, the dog's still gonna lick them, still gonna kiss them and tell them how great they are, even though they've been a bad owner that day and bothered everyone in their wake. Why do I compare them to bicyclists? Same thing with bicyclists. They're not. If you step in the bike lane, get the fuck out of here, and you're in the way. Or. But then they don't follow traffic rules. So which is it? Are you a car or you're not a car? We don't respect the bike lane because there's so many bicyclists out there who are going the wrong way on the street or on the sidewalk or doing, you know, are going through red lights. So which is it? Are you a bicyclist that we should respect or are you gonna do whatever you want and then blame us when you're in the right and then ignore us when you're in the wr. Same with dog owners. Ticked off Tuesday. Two more to go. These are a little bit longer. My ticked off Tuesday complaint is a bunch of my friends messaging me on Instagram to be like, hey, I just want to let you know, you follow potus, President of the United States. You should unfollow them. That is actually crazy. I. Listen, this isn't even political. You're following, first of all, you're following the President on Instagram. That is quite a normal thing. You like them, don't like them, whatever. People are messing. Hey, I just want to let you know, you follow potus and this is all happening, I think because people were, like, finding out that they were, like, somehow following and the President, they thought, like, Instagram did that to them. I don't know that story. I don't know the truth of that story. I'm not gonna sit here and tell you one or the other. And if you wanna comment that, you know, I don't think any of us know I do think part of that is those accounts get moved to the next president, no matter who it is. The account is apolitical. It is the presidential account. So I could understand that someone followed Biden and then all of a sudden it's Trump and you're like, how did this happen? They must have put me into it. I don't think that's the case. So I think, let me just, I, I know one to be true, the other I don't know. But so let's say this person. But so I, I think the reason they're getting the message is because it became a story that, oh, I'm being, you know, you know, being pushed into following an account that I don't want to follow. So maybe that's why these people are messaging. Either way, it's an insane thing to message someone they, I, I, I, I'm mad for you. I know. I still follow POTUS because I followed from when it was Biden. Okay, here it is. And ig, does it automatically unfollow an account just because someone new runs it now? Yeah, I mean, but they all act self righteous and I just have to be like, yeah, I know. I'm not, I'm actually not gonna unfollow because don't get me wrong, even though I hate the guy, I want to stay informed on the info and narratives that he and his administration are putting out there. You shouldn't have to have a statement. I don't want to be getting all my info secondhand. I like to stay informed and hear things from the horse's mouth. And I know, I just know they're all going to be judging me for not unfollowing. But I just think now is not the time to put my head in the sand. Listen, you don't need to. Your explanation is valid, but you don't even need to do that. The idea that you have to explain why you would follow the President of the United States on social media is like actually crazy. Like, dislike again. You could like, you could. You know how many people I follow who I fucking hate, right? You don't do a follow does isn't an endorsement. How many people are you following because you're just like, I just want to like rail against them. How many people do you follow that you share with a whole group of friends because you're like, look how fucking crazy this person is. I have those people. Hey, do you know you follow this person because it might make me mad. What? I just, I think it takes a ton of balls to message someone like that and assumptions of what you are for, against, or how you get your news. I don't know. I'm with you. This is annoying. And listen, I also don't think, like, two things can be true at once. You can go, yeah, I want to follow the President. That's what, that's what I'm following. And you can also go. And you can also say, the people messaging you to say, hey, if you want to unfollow, they're annoying. And they're only doing that because there's also this, like, this antagonistic relationship of like, everything's a team thing. So it's like, I want to make sure you know what team you're on. And it's like that isn't helped by Trump. I mean, the idea that he. I mean, it's crazy. Everything every day is crazier than last because it's never just like. I guess the frustrating part to me is that no one can relent. No one can just go, oh, yeah, I don't like that one thing that person does. No. If they're on your team, you gotta defend everything. You have to put your head in the sand on everything so that you keep to your team. And it's, it's bullshit. And that's what these people are doing to you. But making sure you're on the right team. Fuck them. Last one ticked off Tuesday. Feather. Feather. Love the show. I have this one friend who I love dearly. Her and I get along in almost everything except one thing. Money. Well, that's a big thing, I think. You know, look at who people hang out with. It's usually like a socioeconomic thing. People they can vacation with, people they can live in the same neighborhood as. So this friend that you agree with on everything and you get. Get along on everything. Something like this could split you apart. Recently we've been trying to plan a night out in the city near where we live. We live in the suburbs and are going to see a comedy show. I thought it would be nice to go out for dinner beforehand. And I had gotten a recommendation for this really good Italian place. I was sending out everybody feelers to see if they would all be down for the plan. And I'd make a reservation for eight people. She messages with, I'll come, but as long as you don't book one of those expensive restaurants you like. Ooh, that's. See, to me, I think there's a big difference between I don't want to go there and don't book one of those Expensive places you like. She made a per. Or they. I don't know, the background. She. You wrote she. She made it personal. And again, expensive is different to everyone. Expensive. The worth of something is different to you versus me. If you want a new. I'm looking at a, you know, I'm looking at a. A light bulb. If a light bulb's important to you, there's no ex. There's no such thing as in a light bulb. That's too expensive. It doesn't matter to me. I would go for the cheap. That's expensive. Again, expense. The idea of what's expensive and non expensive is emotional. It is not. It is a concept. It's not. It's not. It is not black and white. You know, to someone. I had. We had Grant Ellis on the Bettra podcast. I said, you're driving a Ferrari, that's $250,000, the cheapest Ferrari. And he didn't even bat an eye. I go, you must. I would assume that must not be expensive to you because you love car. You love a Ferrari. 250,000 was worth it to him at a minimum. So I sent her the menu just to let her get ahead of things. And the prices are more than a fast casual place, but less than a fancy spot. About $30 an entree. That's okay. Which every restaurant in that area is charging the same amount. Her response is, jesus, that's expensive. You guys. You guys go. Me and my boyfriend will just find somewhere cheaper and meet you after. Which I guess is totally reasonable. They write. But ruins the vibe of having the whole group together at dinner before the show. I don't know what to do. Do I find a cheaper restaurant? No, I don't think you do. I don't like the. I. I'm with you. Listen, it's. Maybe you send them three places that you're deciding between that are all in the same area. I don't think you sending them the one place. I think they made it a personal attack. And you were just giving an option to say, jesus, that's expensive. You guys go. Me and my boyfriend will just find somewhere cheaper and meet you after. It's judgy. That's. That's annoying. Do I find a cheaper restaurant? There aren't many close to the theater, which is in the entertainment district, known for higher prices. Not that many. Not many that are cheaper. Unless you're going to like McDonald's. And call me crazy, but I don't want to have my big night out at a fast food restaurant. No, you don't have to explain yourself. It makes me feel like I'm asking for something extravagant or outrageous. But really, I just want to have the whole group out for dinner and have a fun night. Would love to hear your take on it. Thanks for all you do. My take is that you have done the right thing. Go to your dinner. I think they've made it a personal, you know, assault. Not, that's not the right word when you say, Jesus, that's expensive. I, I, it's not really helping. And then saying, me and my boyfriend will just find somewhere cheaper to meet you after. They don't want a solution. I'm with you. They, it's not like they said, well, how about these couple places that I had in mind? They're a little bit cheaper, but they can get us all eight together. If they had done that, that is someone negotiating with you. What this person did is they judged you for the choice you made and then offered no, no counter. So they just wanted you to feel badly. I think the only thing you could have done differently if you really wanted to make, like this person happy. Hey, here are the three places I'm deciding between. Let me know which works best for you. That's the only note I would give to you, but I'm with you. Just the languaging. You wrote this in quotes. Jesus, that's expensive. You guys go. Me and my boyfriend will find somewhere cheaper and meet you after. They don't want to go to dinner with you. I actually don't. I think that this is not in good faith. They never wanted to go. They don't like group dinners. They don't want to spend the money that they know everyone else wants to spend. So they're making it you. They're making you the lavish one. They're making you the person that doesn't care about money so that they can feel better about themselves. There it is. I can't explain it better than that. I can't. I'm like angry for you. This is annoying. I hope you guys have a great meal and have fun. And then they, you know, because that this is what saves them from saying, you know, they're probably embarrassed, you know, to take empathy, to give empathy to this other person. They're probably a little embarrassed. They don't want to spend the money and you don't know if they have the money. But sometimes, again, money is so emotional. This person might have the money and believe they don't. You don't know. We don't know their financial situation. But I would also say you didn't choose a restaurant to embarrass them, and they're kind of taking it that way. So they're trying to figure out this other way to make you feel bad or to duck out. And that's. That's. I. It's hard. That's a dynamic. Difficult to change. The only way you can soften the blow Again, three. Here's three places we're deciding between. Let us know which ones works best for you. If you. Or if you have an opinion. If they looked at all three and went, no. Jesus, all three are so expensive, then what are you gonna do? You did your best. Ticked off Tuesday, every Tuesday on the J Train podcast. Back next week, boom.