Jared Freed (11:00)
The back is all ruined. It's too high, whatever. And the more I got shit from them, the more I'd look at my hair. I'm like, maybe there is something off. And what I noticed was that I had to go get haircuts more frequently because it felt like it wasn't growing in right. So one day I'm walking in the West Village and there's this barber shop and I'm like, I need a haircut. I've been looking for a new guy. Let me go to this place. And I walk in and it's like this old school looking barber shop. And everyone working there is cool looking. Jared, what do you mean by cool? There's an older man who's giving haircuts and he looks like he's from the Dove Body campaign. This guy is a gorgeous older man. It wouldn't surprise me if he does commercial work. He's got a big white beard and his hair is like gray, but it's slick back. He looks like sexy Santa. And then there's another guy who I went to, and he's got, like, face tattoos and like, he just looks cool. It is cool in a way that I could never achieve. And they offer you, like, bourbon. And I'm like, I'm good on bourbon. He's like. And I sit in his chair and this guy goes, what are we doing here? And this is a couple months ago. And I'm like, I don't know. You know, I've been going to this one barber. It seems like he's just given me the haircut he would give to himself. I'm like, look at my head. I parted at the side. This is what I want. Two on the sides, keep it long on top. He's like, I got you. And he gives me this haircut that's really good. That, that I think is really good. But obviously you can tell I don't really notice. And I said to him, I go, yeah, I was getting comments that my hair was all messed up. He goes, yeah, you were pretty. You know, I, I, I could tell the guy before wasn't. He had an opinion, which I appreciated. He's like, the part was all off. I had to, like, you know, do some different things. So I think when you go to a barber, like, you don't really know how great or good they are unless you've gone a few times. So I've been going back to this guy and I really do enjoy getting a haircut for him. It's expensive, don't get me wrong. But expensive is only noticed when you're not getting what you want. I'm getting for a good haircut, if I can feel good, it's worth the money. So I was like, how do I, like, get an appointment for you to come back? And they're like, we have a website. So I go on the website and what I've noticed. So I've gone to him now. I went to him the other day, but I've gone. This is my third time going to him. And the second time I was trying to go on the website and I'm like, this guy's booked up. Like, I go to his name and then I go to the calendar and it's like all booked for haircuts. And then I go back to the calendar. It's like, well, if you want a haircut and a shave, all of a sudden there's appointments available. And I was like, that's strange. So I got a haircut and a shave. I was like, I'll treat myself, you know, because I want the appointment tomorrow. The third time this week when I went to go do it again, I could only get haircut and a shave. And I think they only open up. I think you can only book online and get an appointment if you get the higher priced item. So now, so knowing that, I was like, I grew my beard out. So I'm like, I'm not going to shave. I'll let this guy shave me. I'll do, do the haircut. I'll come out a beautiful swan. But still, I wish this grift didn't exist. It does feel like, because, like the minute you go from like, I just want a haircut, it's like, no appointments available. Then it's like, I'll take a haircut and a shave. Oh, look it, we got some time. And it's like, oh, is it not worth it to you to do just haircuts? Like, And I think, because when I sat down, he goes, so what are we doing? Haircut. Just a haircut. Haircut and shave. And I'm like, I think I could have said I just want the haircut. And they wouldn't because they don't charge you online. But still, I just wish it didn't have this, like, we're fresh out of appointments. You're like, well, what about a shave? Oh, come right in. My last complaint is the building I live in has switched operating programs. So. But they didn't really tell us. So all of a sudden I'm getting these texts that look like they are like someone trying to fuck me. Like, it look not, like, sexual. Like, it looks like someone's trying to, like, steal my money. Like, it. It looks just like one of those texts that are like, click the link and. And you'll be a billionaire. And then all of a sudden, they have all your passwords. Like, I keep getting these texts and I'm like, what is this? And it's like, you have a package that's coming for you. And you're like, what? Who got my number? And then today I'm in the elevator, I'm like, I see the same name on the text that I see on the elevator. It's like the. Oh, Property Management Group property. And I'm like. And I guess it's because I'm a renter here. Like, I'm not in on the news. Like, hey, we're going to be changing the system soon. And I just don't like getting a text randomly out of nowhere. I like an introductory text. I like someone to go, hey, just so you know, I've entered onto your phone for these five reasons, and you'll be getting these texts from here. And that brings me to a different complaint that I didn't even expect I was gonna do right now. On this note, I've been receiving texts from, like, a random number being like, hey, it's so and so's birthday, and they want you to make a video for them on their birthday. So I was included. And it looks like, you know, hit this link and you can make a birthday message. I'm not clicking a link from a random number. I'm just not. My phone, as I told you before, is too important to me. The things I do on there are too important to me to be just like, oh, yeah, I'm just gonna click this link to give a video to, you know, my friend from college. And it's like, if you're going to send that to people, send an email. Hey, you'll be getting a text. Don't be afraid. You know, the link will look like this. Here's a picture of it. Don't just like. Because I got it from, like, the. Like, it was a college friend's birthday, and then it was like their friend from wherever they live sending this. And it's like, so and so. And it's like, randy wants you to make a video for your friend Liz. And I'm like, who the fuck is Randy? Just a little Bit of a hey, just letting you know what's going on here. Nobody wants to get a random text from a random number with a random link. That is, to me, anxiety wise. You have just struck the Match J train podcast@gmail.com. it's a ticked off Tuesday. As you can tell, I am fully ticked off. I'm going to read your emails. I got four ticked off Tuesdays sitting in front of me. We are sponsored Sports are exciting by themselves, but you're ready to kick things up a notch with DraftKings. DraftKings Sportsbook is an official sports betting partner of the NFL and they're ready to take game day to the next level. Ready to place your first bet? Try throwing down cash on something simple like what player you think will score a touchdown. Then head to DraftKings sportsbook app to lock in your pick. The new draft new DraftKings customers can bet $5 to get $200 in bonus bets instantly. That's an awesome way to kick things off. I am a better I am a DraftKings user. What they're saying is you put in five bucks if you're a new person to DraftKings and they're gonna give you 200 bucks in bonus bets, what does that do? You can then put $205 quote unquote dollars on whatever you're looking to play and and you will win real money. It converts if you win. 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I am a huge proponent of Herobred. Just based on efficiency alone. If I'm to show you bread A and bread B to make a sandwich, you're going to take the bread that has and I'm reading it here, it's high in fiber, 0 grams of sugar, ultra low net carbs. That's what I'm going to do. Especially this time of year when you're trying to get a little healthier, trying to eat better. And let me just say, it's delicious. I have the tortillas, I have the, the dinner rolls. I have the regular sliced bread. It's great. If you want to make some better food choices, you can still eat the sandwich, the tacos and the burgers. Just use herobread. Herobread has zero grams of sugar, ultra low net carbs and it's high in fiber. So it's an awesome choice for whatever meal you're making. With something so good for you, you probably expect it to taste flat. But Hero bread is delicious. It's light, fluffy and the texture you expect out of bread, I can attest to that. I have it. I love it. 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So these like boats and you jump off the boat and go in the freezing cold water and then you get back in and you go in the sauna. You go back and forth, back and forth. It was a really fun day and it was, you know, the Weird part is you're with, like, random people. Like one of the guys I remember in the sauna, he was like. He's like, I'm a. I'm. I'm a politician here. He was like, the representative of, like, a. Like a. Like a county. And we started talking about Oslo and the area, and it was great. I loved it. But that is not a hot tub. If someone was like, hey, I got a hot tub, and then they showed me a sauna, I'd be like, do you know what a hot tub is? And vice versa. And it's an influential. Okay. Obviously a big fan of actual finished saunas. Think small hot room made of cedar. And it's an influential factor when selecting among equivalently priced condos. I agree. It's. Do I want a condo with a sauna or without a sauna? Oh, they're the same. Give me the same price. Give me the sauna. It's upsetting to realize that the. This misnomer, false advertising. After I've built up excitement and clicked on the listing. Thank goodness they have pictures so I can figure this out before suffering even more disappointment and purpose. I can't. In person, I can't imagine showing up to my condo that I've rented at the ski mountain, and I'm like, oh, man. How about we start the day with a sauna and then we'll. You know, that would be a part of my plan. And if I showed up and it was a hot tub, I'd be like, well, this is not. We have a different plan now. Also, a sauna, you don't need a bathing suit for. And a hot tub, you kind of do, depending on who you're on this vacation with. This. This person writes, come on, people, stop getting my hopes up. And then disappointing me by calling hot tub sauna. Yeah, you would prepare. You would pack differently for a sauna. That's a. That's the real problem here. Yeah. What do you got to bring? Well, we're going skiing. Bring all your, like, long johns and your jackets, and then there's a sauna. So. Yeah. Yeah, just. Well, you know, they'll have towels for that. That's what I assume. You can. Because asana, you put on a towel and that's it. You can go in your underwear, and then you get there, there's a hot tub. You're like, well, I would have brought my bathing suit. What the fuck? I had this, you know, in Portland, Oregon. I did the shows there. And then I stayed at this great hotel that had this, like, Amazing pool on the roof. And it was indoors when you book there. Like, I kind of would say if I'm Portland and I'm the Ritz in Portland, and I'm like, they should say, like also bring, you know, bring your, your swimsuit, your swim trunks. You might want to swim. I had to swim when I swim. I was swimming in my gym shorts just because I was like, these will have to do. Ticked off Tuesday. Listener of 8 years, Patreon Subscriber, you up? Subscriber. Love your special. Got all my friends to watch senior live shows and you up live and we'll be seeing you in Sydney. Thank you. I'd plan to fly back to the US from Australia at the end of February, but when I saw you'd be in Sydney, I pushed my flight back five days just so I could see your show. Please tell me you'll be taking pics afterwards. Yes, I take pictures after every show. Thank you, thank you, thank you for your years of support and enjoying my stuff. That means the world. I can't wait to come to Sydney. Speaking of travels, now on to my complaint. Recently I was on a short flight on your average plane. Not extra roomy, but not too cramped either. But I was a bit surprised at how little room there was for my feet under the seat in front of me. I tried to stretch my legs a few times, but it felt like there was just no room and it was an evening flight. I couldn't see what was in the way and chalked it up to the person in front of me having put stuff under their seat. Turns out the person in the seat next to me had put their carry on bag under the seat in front of me. No, no, this is. No. They had a bag under the seat in front of them, a small pocketbook on their laptop, and then what looked like looked to maybe be a laptop bag in my foot. Well, is this person out of their mind? I feel like something like this should be a punishable to the extent of putting them on a do not fly list. I agree. Everyone else has to strategize what to put in the overhead bin and what to take with them in their seat so they'll fit under the seat in front of them. Wow, the balls to put stuff under the seat in front of me without even asking me, Jared, am I crazy or is this a dick move? Sincerely, in flight, dick indecency. I. It's a dick move. This isn't, you know, it's funny like the armrests. That is debatable. Who gets It. Middle seat, window seat. Who gets which armrest? Fine. I can understand how that you. You let the chips fall where they may. When it comes to the space in front of you, that is where your bag goes. It is the space in front of you. And then if you want to take extra space at that point, I. You got to ask. Hey, I noticed you're not using it. Do you mind if I put my bag? That's one thing. And again, there would be a complaint there. Like, that sucks, because to say no to that person would take a lot of strength, maybe strength that I don't have, but to just assume, well, I have more stuff, I'll put it in front of the other seat. No, no. We don't know each other. We are not friends. We're not teammates on this flight. We are two random strangers. And I like having my legs, you know, stretched out. Just like you like having your legs stretched out. When you bring extra stuff and extra bags, that is the chance you take is that you are going to be more uncomfortable. I have this hat that I bought at Kimo Sabe. I'm looking at it right now. When I bought it, I spent a lot of money on it. Okay, an embarrassing amount. But the big problem is, like, I said, I was going to bring it with me to towns that would, like, you know, be a hat town, a Nashville, a Phoenix, where I just was. The hard part is I have nowhere to put it on the flight. It's hard to, like, be on a plane with a hat like this because you can't lay your head back. So the only way I would bring it with me is if I'm flying first class, because at least with first class, I know I would have the extra room to put it down. I'm not bringing the hat if I'm flying Delta Comfort. That is the. And if I did bring the hat, I'd have to risk that I'd have to sit in it without putting my head back on the seat. You can't have it all. I would have done. If I was this person, I would have been like. I would have done the extra kick, you know, the kick to let the other person know, like, what's this kick? What? What? Like, I would have acted like I didn't know what was going on. And then I'd be like, is this your stuff? It's under my. It's under. Is this yours? And I. It'd be like, questions that were actually accusations. That's how I would have played it. That's my mom's like biggest strength questions that are accusations. Is that how you're going out? Sounds like you don't like how I'm going out. Is that what you're wearing? That's an accusation that you don't like what I'm wearing? J train podcast gmail.com j train podcast mail.com we got two more ticked off Tuesdays. And if you want to be a part of this, you sign up for Patreon. That's where the first dibs go. I have a ticked off Tuesday. My best friend is a slob. Her house and her minivan are always a mess. Not just clutter, but actual trash. She has three kids. And I sympathize that it is hard to keep up with chores and such, but I came from a family with. With three times as many kids. What? You had nine kids in your family? What? You came from a family with three times as many kids as three kids. Wow, that's a lot of kids. And we managed to keep clean. So part of me feels like that what's her excuse? And I kind of feel like an asshole about it, but it makes me not want to go over to her place. And we always end up hanging out at my apartment. I live alone. She doesn't even seem to notice. She considers herself a maximalist. But maximalism equals. Does not equal trash everywhere. That's all. It bugs me. I love her, but oh boy, I don't know what a maximalist is. And I'm going to look it up. I'm going to look it up. A person who holds extreme views. Well, it says, especially in politics, politics, person who holds extreme views and is not prepared to compromise of or denoting an extreme opinion. In the arts, maximalism is an aesthetic characterized by excess and abundance serving as a reaction against minimalism. And they show a picture of a maximalism type of place. And this isn't dirty. This is just a lot of stuff. It's trinkets. It's. It's. Yeah, I think that's like one of those things. Oh, I'm a maximalist. Well, that's not the same. That would annoy me the most that you take this, like, bad habit and you just give it a new name and then suddenly it's not a problem for anyone else. It's like, did I just sit on a, you know, a Snickers rapper? Whose Snickers rapper is that? Oh, I'm a maximalist. Oh, okay. So I'll just keep sitting on the trash. Cool. Yeah. Like, I don't. The three kids I. Listen, it is annoying because you're like, I have to lose my friend a little bit. Like, I can't be around the mess. And it's even more annoying that they're not even, like, trying to, like, make a change or. I. If I were you. The annoying part is the lack of acknowledgment. If I walk into someone's. You know, I've been in so many cars where someone's like, oh, I'm sorry about the mess. And you're like, this isn't so bad. Oh, my car's crazy. My car's a mess. Just give me one. My car's a mess. Just acknowledge it. Because it sounds like based on your. Your complaint. There's no, like, hey, my bad. We didn't get to it. No, no, no, no. There's nothing. And now. Now you're gonna hang out at your apartment. You're living alone. You don't. You know, I'd rather be at your apartment than the house with three kids. That's a mess. But I definitely understand that. It's like, we don't even get to, like, hang in the living room of this person's house where has a little bit more sunlight than my one bedroom that's in an apartment building. So I. I get that. That. That's annoying. You're like, maybe they keep it messy for that reason alone. They're like, it gets me out of the house. No one wants to come here anymore. Also, when someone's messy, you kind of, like, look at them a little differently. That's the hard part. It's like. Like, even you said they have three kids. So, like, I get it. It's hard to keep up with chores. But, like. And then you go, well, we had nine kids, you know, me and my parents, who apparently had never heard of birth control, but they never heard of a. My dad never would use a condom. So we have nine kids. But, like, we were fine. It sucks. You gotta. Now you're judging your friend. You feel like a miserable. And then, like, cleanliness is also, like, one of those things. It's like, who's to say what's clean, what's not? Everyone has their own version of clean. Like, when I clean my apartment, I call it a hand sweep. Like, I'm just getting it to look clean enough that I can, like, bear to live with myself. I'm sure someone would come in here and be like, what the is going on in here? I'd be like, well, it's clean. I just cleaned. They're like, you cleaned what? And then again, if you go to the apartment Tour on the UW Podcast YouTube channel, you can see like, my bathroom. Like, to me, I'm like, it's fine. To others, they're like, what? How do you live like this? Oh my God. Let's do one more complaint. I have an inconsequential tick. Ticked off Tuesday for you. Well, that's. They're all income, right? Isn't that the point? Realize this week that my favorite egg bites from Dunkin Donuts were recently discontinued. No, those egg bites, if you're like traveling, they have them at. I've had these egg bites. They have them an egg white. If you are traveling and they have them at Starbucks and you're looking for like a healthy way to like, get to your next meal. Those egg bites are the most necessary things in the world. When I have the egg bites, I'm like, thank God this existed. Thank God I can feel good about myself. I can get to the next meal. To hear they've discontinued them is. Is saddening. Now, I'm pretty sure there were no. There are no egg white veggie options there, which is a bummer for folks trying to eat a little healthier. I'm pretty sure there was because I've had them Dunkin Donuts egg bites. Let's look up baked eggs in the shape of donuts that are served with bacon and cheese. They're a breakfast option that can also be eaten as a snack. I've had these before. Yeah. And they. Here are the flavors. Bacon and cheddar. Contains bacon and cheddar cheese and has 17 grams of protein. Egg white and veggie. Contains tomato, spinach and four types of cheese. Has 13 grams of protein. Made with cage free eggs. A good source of protein served in a set of two in a disposable tray. They were also incredibly hot. So went to post about it on my IG and thought twice because my previous post was about a family friend using term very loosely here, losing their home in LA due to the wildfires. And I felt like me venting about fast food menus would have looked kind of to. So I'm venting here. I want my fucking eggs. It is why I started the Luxury Lounge. You're bringing up the exact reason. When I started doing the Luxury Lounge podcast, it started on Patreon and it was just me. It was during the pandemic, during a time where the most annoying people alive would hear you complain about something and they'd be like, well, there's a lot going on right now. Do you really want to complain about that while there's a pandemic and you're like, off? Two things can be true at the same time. We could be going through something shitty and it could be shitty that the fucking egg white, you know, egg bites at Dunkin Donuts have been discontinued. Both can be true. Both can affect you in different ways. And of course, the idea that you say you're upset about one thing and sad about another thing and somehow makes it so you didn't care as much as you said you care. It's all bullshit and it's all the. Of the Internet. And if you can get past it and just not care about it, you will be better off. The is it is the place to take moral superiority. There is no, like, because no one's going to take your side. And again, for anyone going through what's going on in la, you know, I feel for, for you. I, I can't even imagine. I was talking about it with my mom today. I was like, can you imagine? Like, I'm like 10 years old and my brother's 4 and you just got to like, move like. It's crazy. It's actually something that I've thought a lot about and I'm like, I can't believe how little, how hard it is for me to conceptualize, like, just how much someone's life has been changed in the last couple of weeks. And I, I wish you all the best and all and the, you know, I hope, I hope that things come back for you in whatever way they need to come back. I don't even have words to put to it. But that's, that is all to say that someone having an issue with the egg white bites being discontinued at Dunkin Donuts can still have that problem. But what happens is online someone goes, are you really complaining about the egg white bites while people have lost their home? And here's the problem. There is no good reason to defend your plight with the egg white bites. No one's. Everyone backs away, no matter how much people agree with you. Oh, fuck. The egg white bites are done, are gone at Dunkin Donuts. They're not gonna, they're only gonna come to you in secret. And that's like, that's why on the Internet all these moral superiority people get their superiority. There's no win in defending nuance. There's only a win. And look at how evil this person is. They're complaining about the egg white bites at Dunkin Donuts getting discontinued when people are losing their home and it's like, go fuck yourself. And I'm so happy that this person can come here to complain about the Dunkin Donuts egg white bites. I'm proud of that. Proud of what we're doing here on Ticked Off Tuesday. Back next week, boom.
