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The JTrain Podcast
Holiday Parties, Foot Tapping, and Mall Hours - TICKED OFF TUESDAY - The JTrain Podcast w Jared Freid
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Jared Freed
I know you're angry. It's Tuesday and it has no feel. The weekend was fun. You still hungover from the eating and next weekend is too far away. What will you do with your day? It's time to get ticked off. Complain with your gripe. Right now, your friend Uncle J Train is here to tell you that you're right. It's a ticked off Tuesday. Ticked Off Tuesday. You're angry and you don't even know why. Enjoy this podcast. It'll help you get to Friday. Hello and welcome to the jtrain podcast. This is J Train Jared Freed coming to you live from Des Moines, Iowa. That's right, every Tuesday, it's a ticked off Tuesday. Are you angry? Is there something that's really burning you up inside? And you know that if you told people, they'd be like, that's not a big deal. There's bigger issues in the world. No, no, no, no. Not here, not here. In Ticked Off Tuesday. Ticked Off Tuesday are for your problems, your gripes, your little things that no one can say to you. No, no, no. There's bigger problem. Not here. It is your problem and it shall be heard. That's the premise here. I complain with you if you're new here. Every Tuesday, people write in with their complaints. I have three in front of me and I complain with them. I find a way to tell them how right they are. Not all the way. Maybe they write about one thing and it becomes about another thing. That's the beauty of Ticked Off Tuesday. I get a lot of good feedback on Ticked Off Tuesday. There's a. There's a piece of me that's like, let's just do this every day. Let's just do ticked off Tuesdays every day. I don't know it the fun of doing the J Train podcast. It is my little workspace, which I really do enjoy. And I want to thank you for being part of Monday's mailbag Monday. We do need more Mailbag Mondays. We don't get enough. I would love some more. That's my. That's a little. That's a little Mini Ticked Off Tuesday from. From your boy J Train. Mini, just a small complaint about you, the listener. Send in your life and, and, and, and, and relationship and social problems and I'll talk them out. If you want to be a part of TikTok Tuesday, if you want your complaints read right now, all three today are from Patreon. That's the ticket Patreon members are getting. Their money's worth. Five bucks a month gets them Coffee with J Train every Friday. That is like my personal diary. It's embarrassing for me to say that, yeah, I feel like a loser. But every Friday, I kind of just take you through the week I had. Sometimes the stories are reflective. Sometimes they're sad, Sometimes they're funny. I try to make them funny. I mean, I'm not really trying to make them funny. I'm not, like, adding punchline lines. But I'm telling you what's going on in my life. Last week, I talked about the special taping. You can go listen to that. But as part of your Patreon membership, you get first dibs on ticked off. Tuesday, you can comment on Coffee with J Train with your issue, and I'll read it here. We'll get to it. First, I have three in front of me from Patreon. Patreon.com Jared Free to sign up. So you're not just getting. And, you know, maybe you're like, oh, I want mine read. I don't give a. About your diary. Okay? But maybe then you listen to it and you go, this is pretty good. I think it's pretty good. I get a lot of very beautiful and warm feedback from the Patreon subscribers, and I really appreciate that. So that is all to say, I, I. This week's Patreon. This Friday's Coffee with J. Will have a story about last night in Des Moines. I'm taping this on Saturday. I'm looking outside. It is a gray Des Moines day. I like going on the road. I like doing standup. I, you know, I hint at this. If you want to get inside baseball with stand up, you know, there's. There's a lot of people doing stand up that don't want to do stand up. They. They want to go to their audience, and that's fine. They want to go to people that know them, and the people that know them will cheer and make them feel good. I get a lot out of that. I go to a. The look at you that you feel like a million bucks to me. A place like Des Moines, where half the place knows you, half the place doesn't know you is where the work is done. This is where you figure out, are your jokes funny or not? Are your jokes good for your audience, or are they good for everyone? And, you know, that's a little, I mean, someone could say, jared, you sound a little up your own ass. Yeah, I would say that, you know, you have to do something. Has to convince me that the work is worth it, you know, because it is Somewhat frustrating. And this is. We are in ticked off Tuesday. So I'm going to complain. It is frustrating to see, you know, comedians who don't do these areas and, you know, and then rise above and then they. They go to Des Moines and do a stadium, and you're like, lucky fucking you. You know, like, they didn't deal. Because last night. And this is my complaint, you know, I put out the word about Des Moines as much as I could. I told the audience, you guys, and if you're here and you came. Thank you. I appreciate that. I love that. The club, then, you know, I am partnering with the club. And this is business Jared. This is Jared, the econ major talking. The. The. This is entrepreneurial Jared talking to you, Jared. Me, I put out the word to my audience, and there are people that come to see me specifically, which I love and can't thank. Thank you enough for coming. And then the club says, okay, we got some seats here to fill, and they start inviting holiday parties this time of year. And can we just agree that not all holiday parties are built to go to a comedy show? And I'm going to talk more about this on Patreon this Friday, because it's, like, really a whole longer story. But, like, I walk into the club and they're like, jared, we've already worn this holiday party. They've been really loud. They're being crazy. When the club says it to me, I'm like, oh. They go. We've already warned them twice. We've told them that we're gonna have to ask them to leave if they can't calm down. But we're just letting you know, what level of assistance do you want? And I want to be able to have a comfortable show. What level of assistance do I want? I want to be able to go up and have fun and do my jokes uninterrupted. For the people that came for a standup show, again, I have to be worried about the quiet ones. The ones that came to a show with their husband or wife got the sitter. So when you say that to me, it's an acknowledgement that, you know, these people are too loud to be at a comedy show. They don't want to be at a comedy show, and that's okay. I don't want to ruin someone's holiday party. But I guess what frustrates me is, like, we are partners. I invited my people, and then you invited your people. Your people that you invited at whatever holiday party discount aren't doing a good job at comedy show, kick them out, get rid of your people so that my people can have fun. Because that's the thing. I go up with a show in mind, ready to go. I went up last night and this holiday party was just, like, aggressive. Like, it was actually a weird energy. I go, hey, welcome to the show. Half the room clapped, and the holiday party did not. And the one guy is in the front sitting with his legs spread open, like, come on, make me laugh, clown. And let me just say, it is a hard thing to. This is a nuanced talk. Holiday party season is a great season. I was at the Spaniard Shout Out Spaniard, a bar that is so busy, people avoid it. I went on a Wednesday at midnight. It was packed, there was no line, But I could get, you know, I could get in right away. But it was midnight on a Wednesday. And I looked at the bartenders, who I know a little bit, and they're like. And, you know, they're like, these holiday parties came pouring in and they ain't leaving. And I looked around and it was like, this is a tough time for the service industry, a time to make money, okay? So we have to, like, factor that in. Like these. The people at the Spaniard are making good money, but it is a hard season for them. And it is a wonderful season to be a drunk. It is a wonderful time if you're single, if you're kind of like seeing someone to go out on a Wednesday and have that drink that's a little bit, you know, like the. The eggnog that you wouldn't get any time of the year, any other time. It's a. Again, I looked at this holiday party that was at the club, and I'm like, I'm in the way of what you want to do. Like, this guy who's presenting his balls to me and giving me the hey, make me laugh clown. Like, he wants to be funny. He wants to tell the story from the office. He wants to do that in front of everyone, have everyone laugh at him and wear it. And he gets to wear the, you know, the Santa hat. I don't blame him. Let him do that in a back room at an Italian restaurant. Don't do it at a comedy show. This ain't for you. That's my first complaint. My next complaint. I hope you're funny. I will have more about that show that is just a preview of. Of Patreon this week because something happened that was like. I've never dealt with that before. But, you know, I. I gotta say, I've Been doing standup. It'll be 15 years in April. So more than 14 years. I did the things, I take a lot of pride in that I did the open mics, I went to the bar shows, I did the, the, the Italian restaurants, holiday shows. I've done all this stuff. So, like, I am ready, like, I hosted at the Cell. That is again, to go back to the frustrations of many standups who are doing whatever they can to, like, make a living. You know, the frustrations of, like, seeing someone pop off on social media and go and do their, you know, their stadium tour. You go, was I wasting my time getting good at this weird skill that maybe is more niche than people want to admit? Stand up. Because when people come to a show and listen, I can go through the audience. I can. And it's funny. Like, Lotto Marie open, open this weekend. Lotto, who is so funny and everyone should go follow. And she's just a great person. I'm just such a fan of Lotto. And she was like, you never do stand up, and when you do, no, you never do crowd work, and when you do it, you crush them. And it's great. It's so much fun. I'm like, yeah, I don't know. I come with my bits. I don't know. Like, I, I, I always think of my parents when crowd work happens. My parents sit there and they go, enough, enough, enough with the crowd. Enough with the crowd. It has to be a little, it can be a little, little taste and. But I, that's what, you know, you host at the Cellar for, you know, seven years at the Comedy Cellar, they would put you on stage if you did the Saturday show. This is, again, I don't know if you're here for Inside Baseball. I'll get to. I have more complaints from last night. I, I wrote a bunch down. Or from yesterday. If you ever go to the Cellar, there's a Saturday show, there's like a six, seven, there's like a. No, like, like a 7:00 show, an 8:30 show, a not, you know, 10:30 show. And if you get that, if you had to host that 10:30 show, it was like between, like the 8, 8:30 show and the midnight show, they had to get it going real quick. So you were more device than comedian at that point. You more were, you know, you more work for the club than work for yourself. And that was the deal I made. That's okay. It wasn't something I aspired to, to host at the Cellar, but it was something that I needed to do to get to where I wanted to go, where I still want to go. And those are the, you know, the, those are the things you deal with when you run a business. So they used to, when you toast that 10:30 that came between the 8:30 and the, and the midnight, they would go, we have to start on time because we need this show. We can't have the midnight show start at 1:00am you just can't. So they go, jared, you're gonna go. And I would go on stage in a room of 110 people, a basement room. If you've ever been there while this is what was going on, they're still seating people. There are people ordering their drinks. And then if you've ever been there, the bathroom is in the back corner. So there was also a line to the bathroom of both shows having to go. The people that were waiting outside to get in, the people that were leaving from the other show, the line would literally go in front of the stage. So I was literally doing stand up for an audience, getting seated, ordering drinks, and then a wall of people between the front row and the back row of the room in the middle of the room. And there's nothing you can do. How do you make that funny? There's nothing. What's funny is your predicament. So that to me is training. You know, when I go up last night and I say to the company, they go, I, you know, we. Spencer and who also opened, he's very funny. He's going to be in Batavia with me this weekend. And Lotto does a great. They both did a great job. And I go up and these people are being loud and annoying, and I go up and I go, welcome to the show. They're not clapping. The people that came, if you came and you're listening to this episode. Thank you. I would love to hear your perspective. And I know that this show, many of you are like, I can understand over the last few weeks, people are like, listening, like, what's going on at your shows? There's just something in the air. I don't know. I don't know. Again, a theater is just different than a club. And I'm in that. In between, you go to Des Moines, get ready for the club with a bunch of holiday parties. You go to Boston. Look at you. You're the fucking king of Hollywood. Go do the Wilbur and sell out. You know, that's okay. It's. It's humbling and I think it's funny, to be honest. So I hope this doesn't come off. Like, I come complaining about something I love. So I hope that shows. I know that there was a little feedback from. I. I think I did a ticked off Tuesday in Tulsa a few weeks ago. People were like. Like, I called my friend who listens to this show, and he was like. He was like, I got. It was so funny. He was like, I could see that. Like, people like, is he losing his mind? I'm okay. So I go on and I go, you know, I look at the. You know, so in my mind, I was like, jared, here are the things you need to do with this company party that's at your show. Slow it down. Be happy they're here. Talk to them so that we can move on. You can't ignore it. You got to go through it again. Also a lesson for life. Don't go around awkward. Go through it. Hey, what's your name? Where are you from? What do you do? Thank you for coming. That's it. Calm it down. Take. Take the air out of it. And that's what I did. I go up on stage, hey, welcome to the show. And I go and give it up for, you know, I go, this company party, give it up for them. They came out for their holiday party. I have the audience clap for them. I gotta ask you guys, what do you do? The guy with his legs open with his cock showing at me goes, we sell stuff. That was his answer. And I go, well, I don't think you sell books because they sounded like big fucking idiots who don't read. I also don't read, but that's okay. So it's like, that was a good. To me. That was like me showing. Calm it down. I'm a comedian. Gonna make jokes about you. Thank you for the. Thank you for the lob. Sell stuff. I'll get into this on Patreon this week, though. Okay, so here's some other complaints. After the show, I needed a drink. I got a drink and I went. I went, ham. I did some binge eating last night. Let me. Let me. Let me be open and honest. I'm embarrassed about it. I'm not happy with myself. I. I had two martinis and another drink, and I was, like, feeling it. It was cold out, and I was like, let me get back to the hotel. I'm in a hotel where the McDonald's is literally in the parking lot of the hotel. Not a good thing for me, considering my nighttime eating issues. I. I would rather see no McDonald's than a McDonald's. Okay, so I get back I had already ordered door dash to my hotel. And then I go, let me get a fry. So I walk to the McDonald's, and they have these big kiosks, and you can order on the kiosk, which is, is, I think is may, you know, I don't like that the kiosks are there. I think whenever you see a kiosk at McDonald's, it is taking away a job from someone who could, you know, that could benefit someone's life. And I, you know, I don't think McDonald's is a job that, you know, like, people need those jobs. I, I just think that you can get a lot of worth out of that. You can, you know, you hear those stories. People work their way up to own a McDonald's from working one. Like, I don't know. That kiosk ain't working their way up to create a new McDonald's. So you. I, I, I don't really like it, but it was easy. And I'm clicking through the kiosk and I get fries and I get, you know, a nugget. I'm not happy about it. Again, I know doordash is coming, they're delivering food. And then you get to the end and it gives you the option of like, do you want to pay now or at the register? And for whatever reason, I should have paid now because I could do tap and it would be ever. I choose the other option. I think it was more of an accident. I had a couple drinks in me. I'm like, I just, I hit the button quick, and I'm like, fuck, I should have just paid now. So then it says, you're done. Go to the front. And I'm just waiting there. And I'm like, I don't see my order anywhere. And this young kid, he comes over and I go, hey. I go, is my order happening? I don't, I think it was like 167 or something. He goes, and the kid and I were just, like, miscommunicating. Like, I, I, I just, like, he wasn't, I don't know if he was understanding me. I wasn't really understanding him. And I'm, I got a couple drinks to me, I'm like. And he goes, no, you got to order. If you didn't, if you didn't pay, you got to order again. And I'm like, oh. And I'm like, how did that. Why would you do. What, what's going? And he goes, what did you get? I go, I, I. Chicken nugget, French fry, maybe A May, maybe a quarter Pounder. And I go. And he's like, okay, okay, okay. And I go to pay again. And I'm like, are we sure? And I just had this like, moment. I'm like, how did this all go wrong? Why would you even present an option that isn't an option? And what angers me is like, you guys are the geniuses that can set up these huge kiosks and you can't create a. And there's like a way this doesn't go right. Like, at that point, you're not ready to have the kiosk. If this is happening to me, then I come back. My food that I had already ordered on the car ride here to the hotel also gets delivered. Very embarrassing to walk into a hotel holding McDonald's and then go to the front desk and pick up your bag of pizza. Yes, bag of pizza. The pizza came in a bag. It was like a 7 inch taco pizza is what I ordered. I'm going to show you a picture of the taco pizza we're going to put on the J Train Instagram account. This thing, it's, it's not edible. It's not. It's just I'm happy I didn't eat it all. I had a piece, I tried. So it basically looked like they took a bag of Doritos and crushed it up and then poured it on top of a badly made pizza. And I get what you're doing here. Like, there's, there's, you, you know, there's a theme pizza here. This is a taco specialty pizza. But if you're going to, you have to make pizza. The whole thing about pizza is the ability to pick up a slice. There was so much chips on top of this taco pizza that you couldn't even get to a crust to pick it up to be able to eat it. The chips were going everywhere. It was more problem than meal. Here's my other complaint. I'm here in Des Moines. I put up a question box. Hey, I'm flying travel day. Someone goes, and this happens not just on Instagram, with a question box. This happens all the time. You know, listen, I'm going to Des Moines for work. I, I, I, I really don't like, I like community. I hate tribalism. And I don't even know if I'm saying the words right, but I, and please correct me if I'm totally way off. Just this idea that, like, I have to attack someone else because they're going to Des Moines, because I, I'm from somewhere else that has a thing against Des Moines. I have nothing against any place. I. I can understand why someone would live here. I can understand why someone would live in Manhattan. Different problems in each of the places, different things you deal with. I put down going to Des Moines. Someone writes, enjoy the ice storm. What do you want me to get hurt in an ice storm? There's no way to read that. Where it's like, I don't feel like someone's cheering against me. I'm not going to Des Moines with a bunch of my buddies where we're gonna go, you know, like, ruin the world. Like, the way that. The response of, hey, I'm going to Des Moines for work, because I got shows to do where I'm gonna try and make people laugh. Enjoy the ice storm. Okay, I can't turn around. I can't not go. This is a. I have a contract. Like, I don't understand what is. I. Maybe it's the. Maybe they think I'm trying to think of a friend would say that to me, how I would take it as opposed to someone, like, random on the Internet. And maybe it would be different. Enjoy that ice storm. I guess that's the only way I could see it. Where it would be like, not. Not offensive, but it would be caring. Hey, there's an ice storm coming. Oh, that's gotta, that's gotta blow. And I'm looking outside, there's no ice storm. It's fine. Also, Des Moines, they. They've dealt with ice. Okay, I'm on the flight. Here's. I have more complaints. And we're gonna get to three complaints from the listeners. Again, I always get to the complaints. There's only one sponsor. We'll get to the sponsor in between. Let me just do it now because. Oh, no, Before I get to the sponsor. Delta, if you're on a flight over two, I think two and a half hours, you get a meal. If you're on a flight with a meal and it's like a three hour flight, the meal ain't great. It's kind of like a package salad. I'm not a fan of it. It's okay. I think that they should do something different. I wish they would just give us. How about you go to Jersey Mike's and get us a couple small subs? Like, why don't we do that? That would be so much better. Because you see the pack. I understand they have to have a package thing and they're not gonna heat it up on these smaller planes. I'm on the smaller plane. But there's gotta be a better idea than this. Like, I don't like it. You know what it is to me? I don't need a Waldorf salad in a package. I don't need you faking fancy. It's like the watch that's like big and gaudy, but, you know, it's cheap. They're just trying to look like the expensive thing I would compare it to. It's like, okay, and this, this phase, I think is over. But there was a specific time in history, recent history, Bob Kraft, the owner of the Patriots, was like, he was the owner of the Patriots. Still is. The Kraft family. It's always weird when, like. Mr. I think it's weird when people call the commissioner Mr. Commissioner, like, of the Major League Baseball. It's like, why are we talking to them like they're a dignitary? Like Mr. Kraft. Bob Kraft is the owner of the Patriots. I don't. I. Good for him. Good businessman. He seemed, he seemed to get it at the time when he bought the Patriots, it was the most someone's ever paid for a franchise. I think he has been proven right. Good investment. Good for you, Bobby. This idea that we have to hold Mr. Kraft. I hear people say that with Mr. Kraft, they do it like it's Vince McMahon. Mr. McMahon. Like, Mr. McMahon was a character. They treat the. I don't know. So Bob Kraft, when he. When the Patriots are in their heyday, they're having this unbelievable run and winning every Super Bowl. Bob Kraft would wear the blue shirt with the white collar and the white cufflinks. And it was as if that was the billionaire uniform again to bring it back to wrestling. The cartoon. Mr. McMahon, who's the boss, the evil boss. Bob Kraft seemed to dress as billionaire with that blue shirt and, and it looked good on him. But then you would see people who were not billionaires buying the. The men's warehouse version of the blue shirt with the white cuff and the white collar. And they looked to me, ridiculous. That is, to me, the Waldorf salad on the first class of the three hour flight that's taking it to Des Moines. We don't need it. It's ridiculous. What's frustrating about this meal is that I don't want it. But they have one of their best meal items. This big chocolate chip cookie comes on this tray. I would honestly would get. I would ask for the whole Waldorf salad in a bag just to get this big chocolate chip cookie. And it is fantastic. And you can't get it unless you get the full meal. Like, I just want to. I'm sure I didn't do this, but I'm sure if I went to the front, was like, hey, I just want the cookie off that tray. Can I get that? I think they would do it, but does that mean that they throw away the whole tray? I just don't know why we're not. To me, come around with that basket that you put the snacks in with, like, turkey sandwich. I don't want to. I hate tuna, but I get why they would do tuna sandwich, turkey sandwich, ham and cheese sandwich, and then a bunch of the cookies. Hey, do it. Come on. Let's do this. Brown paper bag style. My last complaint, it's a holiday complaint. I get sent a lot of, like, happy holiday bags. You get one from your manager agencies, people you've worked with. And I'm not trying to call out Spotify, but Spotify, who has been very good to me, sent us the can for the UF podcast. You got an email. I got an email from Spotify, like, hey, we're doing a gift for our partners or whatever, and I. And I. If you want to. If you want the gift, they have you fill out a form. So I fill out the form because I just wanted to see what they're sending. Like, of course. Let's get it on this gift. And they sent. I. I opened it. It's funny, I don't even remember what they sent. I remember thinking it was pretty good. I think it was, like, a cashmere, like, travel blanket with an eye mask, which was like, I don't think I'll ever use it, but it was very nice. Here's my issue. They always dress up the gift with, like, it's got to be, like, themed. And they put, like, snow in it to show that it was holiday season. Now I'm opening up this package and this weird snow that's used to be decorative. It's not using to protect. It's not being used to protect the items. It's not being used to, like, as part of the. It's like this weird snow is getting everywhere, and it's like, who on earth thought this was, like, a good or fun idea? And I. I guess as an idea, it's okay. You're like, we have to decorate. We're gonna make it holiday theme. But, like, you're making a mess of everyone's apartment. I don't know what this fake snow is. And this happens a lot with, like, these gifts. And it's not just Spotify. Like. And again, Spotify is going to a company that does this, that says, we're gonna put together your holiday gift bags that you send out to your partners, and they're gonna think of you in a positive way, which I understand the whole thing here, but how about these companies? They're making a huge. In what world do I want snow all over my house? Fake snow? None. And now I can't complain about this. Only in ticked off Tuesday can I say this is ridiculous, because people go, you complain about the gift that you got from Spotify. What are you talking about? You don't want the gift. It's like, of course I want the gift. I don't want, you know, to be sweeping up. So this is the type of snow that you'd find, like, six months later, you'd be like, am I still cleaning up this snow? We have one sponsor, every plate, which I am, like a huge fan on, because there's three ways every plate's gonna help you. They're gonna give you meals that are like five dinners for $5.99 per serving during this time of year. You want a meal that can just get you to the next meal because of all these holiday parties and all these functions. You don't want huge meals on a Monday where you're gonna be doing the holiday party on a Thursday, and you know you're gonna be doing double McDonald's like I did last night. So what you want is something that is cost effective, something that's delicious, something that's healthy, and also something that can make you feel good mentally. And I do think these meal kits mentally are really a nice, satisfying moment because you get the. All the stuff is. It's like a puzzle. You get all the stuff sent to you, and then you put it together and you see how you did and you get to finish it. It is a finishable puzzle that you get to eat. If the budget's getting tight this season, let everyplate save you some coin. 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With affordable dinners for just $5.99 per serving plus 50% off your first box, every plate helps you save money for a stress free holiday. Get this amazing deal by going to everyplate.com podcast entering code jtrain599. That's code jtrain599@everyplate.com podcast. That's our sponsor. It is in the description of the episode. So go get your free money. I got some ticked off Tuesdays. In addition, I'm going to be in Batavia this weekend in Illinois doing shows. I'm also going to be in Portland, Oregon. I'm going to be in Phoenix, Arizona, Montreal, just released. And then I go to New Zealand and Australia. If you know anyone in those areas that want, you know, I, I, I always say assemble the group chat. But maybe you have a friend that moved abroad to Australia or New Zealand. They're looking for something to do. I got shows all over the so get them together. Would love for them to come to the show. Okay. Ticked Off Tuesday. Jared, I need to get this complaint off my chest and your podcast is the only place I can do it. This is why I love Ticked off Tuesday. It's fantastic. As as most quota carrying sales organizations do, my company has a big president's club incentive trip every year. Okay, I do understand this. If you hit a, if you hit a goal, you get to go on a big, big trip. And this is something that they hold a little carrot they hold out in front of you. And you know I've heard of these trips and some I remember I was like with my family on vacation. Like a friend of mine was there with his wife in Aruba on one of these trips and she like hit her goals and like they were at like the Ritz in Aruba, like like living. I'm thrilled to have qualified for the trip halfway through our fiscal year. Good for you. You're killing it. But the problem is that I do not want to go. I love to travel but the destination is a small. This is the thing. And I hear them. They are so right. If you're gonna have an incentive trip, it better be an incentive. It better be A place where people like Aruba, the beach. No brainer. Who doesn't want to go to the beach in Aruba? Now if your company is located like on the west coast, you might go. It's a lot of travel to go to. Is there there should be a secondary cash option. So they write I love to travel but the destination is a small coastal European city that no one I know has ever been to. When the trip location was announced I literally had to google it. Lol. Yeah I, I if you google it. Listen I, I do think you could be pleasantly surprised. But okay. And they probably chose this place because it's not, you know, small European town. It isn't Santropez where everyone else is going. There's they're cheaping a little bit. A little cheap. I did some research on travel blogs and Facebook groups and many people refer to this city as skippable in relation to other cities nearby that you can visit. From the southern state that I live in it would take three, three flights and 15 hours of travel. Now this isn't an incentive, this is a problem. I would also need to pay for a week of child care for my kids in order for my husband and I to attend if the debt. No, this is horrible. I'm sorry. This should be a second option if the destination were somewhere more desirable. I also like in what world I they must work for an international company because I don't think some company in Mississippi is like we're going a coastal city in Europe. No, it must be an international company if the destination were somewhere more desirable. I would be happy to arrange these accommodations but not for a place that I have no excitement towards going. That's a lot to get you off the couch. I get it. There's no alternative to take a cash bonus incentive in lieu of the trip. And it is also very looked down upon to not go at all. See, that's horrible. No cash bonus incentive in lieu of the trip. Look down upon. This is not I don't like when someone just assumes everyone's going to love it. Who planned this? I can't talk about this to people in my real life because complaining about a free high end European vacation provided by by my billion dollar employer doesn't exactly induce a sympathetic response. Thank you for giving me my luxury complaint. A safe space to call home. Sincerely. Why couldn't it be Greece or Italy? It's gotta be a place. Three flights, childcare 15. This was the thing. So to bring up can and Spotify brought me to this thing called Can Lie. Cannes Lions, which is like an ads festival that they have in Cannes. And it was funny to me that, and I think I talked about it on one of the podcasts, just how all of these people who were at Cannes Lions, they had this, like, unenviable thing where they were at the most beautiful place in the world where there was the news coming from it. So, you know, different performers every night. But they were at work, they had to be on. They had to go to meetings and then go out at night. And by the end of it, if you had kids and a wife or husband at home, you come home and they're like, hey, back into regular life where kids are crying. You got to feed people. There was no like, oh, I need a vacation for my vacation. Because if you came back and you're like, oh, man, Cannes was so hard. They would like, no, no, no. What are you talking? Like, if you. I felt bad for anyone married with kids who had a sp back home because they could not go home and say they were tired from this trip because it did have alcohol, it did have fun, it did have this glitz and glam. But you were at work, you were on for a week. And same to this woman or person, I don't know, male, female, same with this person. Like, they, this, this vacation has become a problem. It's become work. The one thing that I would like, I, I, I take your side more on, like, all of the stuff Googling. Is it a skippable town? To me. And again, these are my assumptions. If this town is gone to while people are doing a bunch of towns at once. I think staying in a place is way different than doing a place on your, like, on maybe a cruise. Oh, we liked, we like that island. That island we could skip. I think you're getting a different experience. So this is me encouraging you that don't believe the hype of, like, these people who write online. It's a skippable place. Because I actually don't. I would more trust the review of someone who was there for a week, because that's a different experience than because you might like it. I, I just don't think, you know, to me, that's like someone saying, skip Des Moines on your tour. Like, no, if you hang for a weekend, you go, oh, no, Des Moines got good, good people. There's like a food scene here. Someone told me last night here in Des Moines that, like, chain restaurants don't do well here, which, like, that's kind of a cool thing. I think, like, they're like we support, you know, the people that open places. So. No, I'm with you though. I'm trying to think of a solution. There's really no solution. I'm just, I'm mad for you that they don't go, hey, just, just make it so. There's a direct flight within an hour from most major airports. I don't need co. And they probably did it because they got a deal. I've got a ticked off Tuesday for you. After the pandemic, the mall never went back to opening at 10am they open at 11 in Austin. And I never have enough time to shop before I have to deal with the kids. And I get it. A lot of us only shop online. But I love in person shopping and trying on clothes because I'm terrible about returning things. I'd even argue opening at 9am would be a worthy investment for stores. We've also lost a lot of the stores and restaurants that used to be 24 hours pre pandemic. Maybe I'm just a gal who keeps weird hours, but it's annoying for stores to be closed until 11, especially during the holidays. I'm with you. This sucks. It's. I mean, for me, you know, I am, you said I'm. Maybe I'm just a gal with weird hours. I'm a guy with weird hours. So I'm with you. This is, I mean bars used to stay open. I mean this happened in New York City too. The city that never sleeps. Is that New York City? You know, every bar was 4am and then they realize they're like, oh, oh, we don't have to stay open till 4 start then. And now you have to like find the 4am bar, the eating thing. I'm with you. Here's my issue again. I. You, you wrote something that I think could be expanded upon. None of these places have gotten creative. I'd argue opening at 9am would be a worthy investment for stores. Why aren't these stores being like, hey, we're doing pre work post work hours. We can make more money. You can get your. Get in here and shop. We're going to be open from 6:00am to 8 and you know, on, on these days and 5:00pm to 10 on these days. Let's change the hours. This is when people can get to you. There's just no budge. And it does feel like since the pandemic, that does feel like the great, kind of like people woke up to the idea that like oh, we don't have, you know, why would we be killing ourselves for to be here at certain hours where it's not really helping anyone. It's just helping this one person with weird hours like you and I. No, I. I'm with you. The malls in general. Like, you see these malls, and they're either not open at the right times or they have nothing. There's just nothing. And you're like, I. And I don't know if we're holding on to them. Where is the money being made? You know, are we holding on to these malls? Because, like, what else are we gonna do? You can't just bulldoze them and turn them into something else. We don't know what the other thing would be. I'm with you. I want to try stuff on. I want to go into a mall and have it bumping. All right, last one. Ticked off. Tuesday. This Sunday, I went to see the Vienna Boys Choir at Carnegie Hall. Fancy. During several of the songs, the woman next to me tapped her foot in time or slightly out of time with the music. I could feel it through the floor. It was so distracting. I listened to the U UP podcast where Jared and Jordana discussed the red flag or deal breaker about someone singing during the Wicked movie. Yeah, this seems very similar. I agree with Jared that it could be kind of cute if your date is so moved by the movie that they would sing a little bit under their breath. But this foot tapping was not cute. Foot tapping. And, like, being moved by the music is so different. But also, I have empathy for the foot tapper because I'm a, I'm a knee shaker, and I know that bothers the fuck out of people, and sometimes it shakes the room and you don't notice it. So I do know that, like, that's something that, like, I would want. They need a spouse to be like, hey, stop it. Like, this is my. To me, if you're in a relationship, it is the partner's job to be like, easy, easy, big fella. Like, again, you know, this is why you know couples. You want a couple where they keep each other's delusions and in, in check. And to me, I'd be more mad at this person's spouse who's with them, whoever's with them. Hey, cut the foot tapping. You know, for you to have to say it is annoying. The major difference between the two scenarios is that Wicked plays multiple times a day at theaters across the country for the next month, and tickets cost $10. No, no, no. I, I, I understand. This is a special night being ruined by someone who thinks they're A metronome. But the Vienna Boys Choir is a live performance. One that happens at Carnegie hall once every December. And the tickets are 10 to 20 times that. It is basic concert etiquette to sit still and limit talking and rustling. I'm with you. This is annoying. Carnegie hall gives out cough drops before every show to limit coughing because it could disrupt your fellow patrons. I didn't know that. That's fantastic. I've been to Carnegie Hall. I went. My brother's wife's younger sister is a violinist. She's unbelievable. And I went to the show. I talked about it on Patreon. It was beautiful. The. The space is beautiful, the music is beautiful. It would be annoying to hear someone take you out of that. There's a whole zone you're going to in a place like that. Why did this woman think that tapping her foot against the floor repeatedly would be okay? I don't think that. Again, like my. My most empathetic. I know. We're in ticked off Tuesday. You're allowed to complain. I agree with your complaint. I hate her. The group she's with, she has been. She has a nervous tic as a knee shaker. I get it. I told my husband this story and he said I sounded like my 70 year old British father. Please complain with me. Love everything you do. No, no, no, no. Your husband is absolutely wrong. You're right. This is annoying. Is the woman, like out here to let people know she gets music more than most? I don't think so. Is the person with them, whoever their group is, that's also hearing this foot tapping, for them to not go, hey, hey. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, hey. Tapsy. Hey. Tip tap. Enough. Hey, hey. We had a tap show. Just was his name Alvin? What's that? Tap dancer. Famous, famous tap dancer. What's his name? Hey, Gregory Hines. Cut it out. Hey, Fred Astaire. Enough with the tip tap. There's another guy, Alvin. He does like a class. I'm looking for him. Alvin Alley. See the tap dancer? I thought he used to do a show in New York every year. I don't know. Yeah, No, I hate the people with them that they annoy me more than the woman. And now it's become your responsibility. And then what are you gonna do? Shush. You can't. You can't shush. Because I don't think a tap on the floor, people would know. It's not a shush thing. Shh. No one's talking. Miss. No, there's a tap. What? You shushed a tap. I don't Think you can shush a tap. That's annoying. There's no good way. There's no polite easier way than, hey, cut it out. Shush would be nice. It's like wanting a lighter honk on the horn. Like, I just want to honk for, you know, you want the. It's like you give the horn for the, you know, move it along versus, you fucking piece of shit. There's two different horn honks. That's your problem. This is the problem here. There's no way to be like, cut out the taps in a polite way. I'm with you, sister. Ticked off Tuesday. Back next week. Boom.