Jared Freed (0:00)

It's a mailbag. Munder, do, do, do, do you got problems there? I'm gonna help you from the comfort of my chair. It's a mailbag. Monday. Hello and welcome to jtrain Podcast. This is Jay Train Jared Freed coming to you live from Sydney, Australia. Australia. That's right. Every Monday is a mail bag. Monday, you, the listener, send me, the podcaster and comedian, an email. Looking for perspective, just to be honest with you. And I want you to keep sending your emails. We love an email. J train podcast@gmail.com. j train podcast gmail.com. anything you just want to hear someone talk about that you're going through. And the beauty with a podcast and sending in your email to a podcast is that I don't have to make eye contact with you. I can speak freely, openly, and then we can all be entertained. We have one ad. This is going to be a quick one because I'm taping this while on the road. It is Sunday as I tape this month Saturday back in New York and I have two emails in front of me. We have one sponsor. I'll get to the sponsor in between the emails, I just want to encourage you to do one thing. If you are listening to this right now, go to my YouTube channel. Go, just get subscribed. It costs you nothing and it means the world to me. Subscribe. Every Saturday, I'm putting up longer crowd work clips. So we just put one up literally a couple hours ago. And it's from Batavia, from way back when, when I was in Batavia in December. And it's like 11 minutes of having fun with the crowd. It's funny. V, our producer here, she texted me. She was like, I was crying, laughing. I was editing this. So that means a lot to me. She watches my all the time. She's probably tired of me. So for her to say that, that's a huge compliment. So I want you to go to YouTube and subscribe and then comment, comment, comment. That helps. That is, you know, that's, that's mana for father algorithm. That is a tribute, so to speak, that gets, you know, the hope and prayer. But know this never, I, I don't know, this happens for me sometimes I have people that show up to shows, they go, I came because you came up on my algorithm. You know why that happens? Because you like it, you favorite it, you share it, you comment. And then the algorithm, the job of it is to find like minded individuals who like the same things as you and then puts it right in front of their face. So that's my ask of you. I have a lot of asks. I have a lot of ways to compensate. Join the Patreon where I'm doing Coffee with J Train and I'm talking about my. I'm basically writing a diary there. Every Friday, you know, I just talked to my dad on the phone. He goes, like. He goes, I'm all caught up on your trip. I listened to Coffee with J Train. I heard about everything. So this Friday coming up, I'll do another coffee with J Train. Recapping this week in Sydney and Melbourne. And I played golf in Melbourne, which was like a thrill. And I just climbed the Sydney Bridge. I just did that. I'm coming off the bridge climb, so. And I'm gonna go to Bondi. Bondi. Bondi beach after I tape this. So we have. Okay, that's all my ass. On top of that, Brisbane and Adelaide and Newcastle shows. Show shows also coming back. Morristown, New Jersey, is sold out. Nashville, Rochester tickets available. Jared free dot com. So let's get in mailbag. So we have two emails in front of me. This will be a relatively sleek. Is that the word? This will be a slender sleek. This will be a. No, that. That is not how I want to describe this. This will be a. This will be an efficient J Train Monday mailbag. But I want to make sure you got something to wake up to. That's the promise here. The promise is that you can listen to this. Monday morning when your head's racing, you go, oh, my God, I got all my. I gotta lose a thousand pounds. I gotta be better at my job. No, no, no, no. Let Papa J.T. take the wheel. Uncle J.T. uncle J train. All the feathers. My neighbor and I, both early 30s, moved into a new neighborhood with dogs within a week of each other last fall. So they're both dog people. They move into the same neighborhood. They got dogs. So they're probably walking around the same time. They probably. That's how they get to know each other. We have clicked and become fast friends. But I've never cared for her husband. Okay, that is one of those things. You get the gift of fresh eyes because you don't want to. Not like this person's husband. You don't want to, like, cheer against them. Like, you're almost the most honest person in their life. Like you're. And you're seeing them as they are today. You don't have the background of. Oh, well, they spent all these years together. This was that. And then. And she was going through something, and he helped her through but now he's kind of a dick. But that's how he is, you know? You know, you have none of that. You're. You're a babe. You're a. You're. You got newborn eyes. I don't even know if that's a real thing that I just said. Newborn eyes. Okay, but you. You know what I mean? So he has to drink. Okay, so. But I've never cared for husband. So you're meeting this person in your neighborhood, you become fast friends. You meet the husband, you're like, not great. He has to drink to be social, has very opposing views to life as me. He also appreciates that his wife is currently un. Unemployed. Appreciates? Who would appreciate that someone's unemployed? He also appreciates that his wife is currently unemployed in a housewife, even though she is miserable being a housewife and has since moving found a good job that she enjoys. Hold on. He also appreciates that his wife is currently unemployed and a housewife, even though she is miserable being a housewife and has since. And has since moving found a good job that she enjoys. So, okay, so she's not currently unemployed. All right. Okay. We. I guess you guys aren't taking writing classes together, so. Okay, I'm gonna assume she has a job now, but when she was unemployed, the husband that you don't enjoy was. Was kind of reveling in it. Well, this past weekend, he crawled into bed fully clothed in hand at 3am drunk and passed out. To me, listen, I don't. I don't see that out of me in my married life, getting into bed drunk with phone in hand, fully dressed, I just, you know, that whole thing. Nothing good happens after midnight. Nothing good happens after 2am Whatever the time is for you. This, to me, what's going on. This woke my friend up, and so she got the phone out of his hand to put on the charger so it wouldn't be dead. What a nice wife. The phone was unlocked. To his Snapchat messages, a Not a good thing. Snapchat messages. You know this person, they're both in your early 30s. I don't know that. I don't think that's. That's like the back alleys of the Internet, the back alleys of social media. To me, in your 30s, maybe in your 20s, that's a different thing. I know. I know that Snapchat is being used a lot by younger people. I. I think. But to me, anytime I've heard about Snapchat being used as younger people, it's like people's children like, it's like teenagers. But I, I, I don't, you know, so I know it gets used in a way. I am not using it. The phone was unlocked to Snapchat messages with another woman about how great tonight was and she hopes they can get together again soon. Hey. This morning before he left for work, she confronted him and he admitted to cheating on her. Apparently, he also cheated one and a half years ago. It's interesting the way you're getting the information. Like you met this person in your 30s through dog walking and appreciation for dogs. You become fast friends. You meet the husband, then they confide in you. Hey, I, you know, had this horrible thing happen. I saw the phone, I, I confronted him. And then they're saying, and also this isn't the first time. Like, this is the time, you know, that's not the opening conversation with your new friend. Usually like, hey, nice to meet you. My husband's great, but we had a thing a year and a half ago. No, it comes up when other things, you know, I should let you know. This is also something that happened. So it seems like that's how you found out he also cheated one and a half years ago. I learned all this on the morning dog walk. And then she asked me what I think she should do. We were wrapping up the walk anyways and I told her I'm here to support her if she needs anything. A listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, space to sit. And we parted ways. Obviously, I think she should leave him, but how do I support my new friend? Thanks for all the advice and laughs. Not your average southern belle. Well, this is tough, but here's the one thing you have. They did ask you. And it kind of goes back to everything I've been talking about with this email along the way. They asked you because you are like new friend, wide eyed, no history, no biases. You're as much, you're like me in this situation. You're the podcaster. You're the one with, you know, that can be honest with them in a way that maybe family and friends can't be honest or they wouldn't really trust their honesty. It's like, it's like your dad telling you, don't date that person or your mom, don't date. And you go, you become rebellious. I, you know, I want to date that, you know, that you don't understand it, dad. And it's like it's your biases playing on the parent and you fight against it. With you, you're kind of, there's a reason they're coming to you. They're actually. They actually value your perspective because you're uninvolved, because you didn't know the husband from way back when. Because. And again, they're going to take your perspective with whatever they take it with. I'm not saying they're going to listen to you. I think for you. But the one thing you should always, you know, I don't give advice unless I'm asked. You write into the podcast. That's when I give advice. I don't, you know, if a friend tells me something that's happening. Ugh, I'm sorry, that's going on. That's my first response. I'm sorry you're going through that. Or I try to make that my first response. I'm sorry. That sucks. Sometimes people just wanted. That sucks. It sounds like this person wants more than. We're wrapping up the walk anyways, and I told her, I'm here to support it. You said the, you said the great thing. I. I can't. Everything you said is something nice. She asked me what I think she should do. That's the important thing. And I think here's what I would do if I were you. You said, I'm here to support. I'm here to listen. I do think when they ask what you think you should do, you have the. The opening. The door is open if you'd like. The next time you guys go walking, how's it going with so and so and they. How's it going with your husband? I think that's the opening. Tell me, what's the update? If you want to help. If not, I think it's hard to not talk about this because they brought it up on your walk. I mean, this will be the central topic of the walk from now on. It might, you know, put you in a different role with this friendship, but I would. I. To me, you know, the next walk, the next hang. So any updates? How's it going with your husband? And let him talk. I mean, the problem with. The problem with telling someone, you know, I do not like being in the business of telling someone what to do. I don't know, you gotta hear. You gotta listen to them and listen in the way that I try to listen to these emails. Things are written that I pull out because that's where I can say, maybe that's something to think about. Maybe that's something to, you know, be cautious of. I mean, you think you should. I mean, the problem you're probably writing into this podcast because you're like, well, I already didn't like the husband. I don't want to be biased, but, like, I think that's okay to let her know, like, hey, I never really saw it to begin with. Like, I was. You know, this to me, opens up the floodgates of, like, you want my real opinion on your husband. When we met, I never really got it. You and I click right away. He has very different views to me, it seems like, even to you. If you end up leaving him, I'll be here for you, like, you know, as a friend. And I think we get along. But, like, I just. I'm gonna tell you right now, I never saw it. I. And. And I think it get. And then. Then you're just kind of again, like you said, listening. Ear, shoulder to cry on, space to sit. You know, I'll hold your hand a little bit through this. And I listen. The problem is you don't want to be like, you know, get a divorce. And then they're like, they become your responsibility. Oh, I hate the dating apps. Why'd you do this to me? I don't think that's gonna happen. I think what's gonna happen is this person is gonna, you know, you're. What. What this could be. Listen, I don't know how you'll feel about this. And it depends on, you know, you might be writing back to me in six months. Gh. This is all this person talks about. I'm still going through it with them every walk. Now I'm avoiding them to go take the dog walk. That's a different problem. The problem right now is you care about your friend. And, you know, I think you just say, my opinion is they cheat once, they're going to do it again. They. Now you found out they did. Do you want to be with someone a year from now who's cheating on you? Again, that would be the questions I'd ask. And then you have to get into, like, the other part of this is there is a number of reasons people stay in marriages now. Healthy, unhealthy, whatever those reasons are, they are someone's reasons. The. The reason, you know, Internet commenters. I. I get bogged down by the Internet of it all. Because, you know, when you deal with the Internet, it speaks in morale. You know, it is black and white to a commenter, to maybe a person who's screaming at you on Tick Tock. That's why I like a podcast. Like, you can, like, I do empathize with someone who's like, listen, if someone was cheated on and they stayed with their significant other because they had other reasons to stay. And they work through it and now they're better off on the other side. That can happen. I mean that, that takes work, that takes forgiveness, that takes communication. You know, not everyone has that ability. If you're cheating, you're probably not very good at communicating anyways. You know, one, the, the cheating is a symptom of that. So I think the empathy of like, if they choose to stay, like, I'll still be your friend. Like, you don't have to be embarrassed because you had six reasons that you were like, I need to stay in this. You know, the kids are young, we have a mortgage together. There's a number of reasons, I think, being empathetic to that. Because I think what happens now, especially with the, the bat, you know, the background noise of the Internet is someone can say who would ever stay with someone after they cheated on. Very judgmental thing. And they get the ability to do that because no one's. They're not asking for any vulnerability on their end. So I think that is also something to like, be wary of. Like, why did I. My question, what, what happened a year and a half ago that you thought that this was like, worth staying in? Maybe it was just that I don't want to be single and you can maybe be a comfort to them there. So this is all to say it sounds like you were a good friend. They are asking. That is my one. That's the one rule. I don't give advice unless I'm asked. And you were asked. So now that you've been asked, you can say, let's hear the update. What's going on? And they're coming to you because of you being new friends. That's like the, the thing that you should like, kind of understand. Like you're the least judgmental. You're like the easiest person to talk to. You know, you weren't even at the wedding. Like, I'm sure, like, if you, you know, I'm thinking of ending this. Like, I don't want to tell anyone. I to give us a gift and fly to like Cozumel for our weekend, you know, wedding. Oh my God. Like that does play into it. As stupid as that sounds. We're sponsored. Want to pack in the bread without packing on the pounds. Hero breads here to save the day. Herobred makes delicious bread with ultra low net carbs, zero grams of sugar and a ton of fiber. Put that bacon, egg and cheese on a 4 gram net carb Bagel or enjoy a cheese and herb croissant with some jam. Whatever kind of bread you're craving, Herobred's version is going to taste amazing and never like diet food. I can speak to that. I have Herobread. I've had it. It's delicious. It doesn't seem like lesser bread. If anything, it's more. It's gonna be full of fiber, it's gonna have no sugar and you know, zero grams of sugar and four grams net carb bagel. You can't find that. Again, this is an option of like efficiency. Do you want a bagel that's going to be, you know, make you fuller, longer? Yeah, I do. So that's where Herobred comes in. I have it in my freezer. Pop it in the toaster. It's great. It is the chance to eat bread guilt free, so to speak. Herobread brings you all the flavor with none of the compromises. Herobred is offering 10, 10% off your order. Go to HERO CO. Use code Jtrain at checkout. That's JtrainHero CO. We have another email. It's a little bit longer. Best friends and best friend and fundamentals. Okay, here we go. J train. I'm a listener since the TMA TFM days and a Patreon subscriber. Thank you. I need advice about a friend situation with a lot of nuance, using all fake names. My best friend Jeff and I have known each other since college. Lived together two years during that time. For context, we are both kind of your average white guys from the Midwest. I'd say. I grew up middle class and more liberal. Liberal. Went to public school, took out loans for college and he was more upper middle class. Private school and his family paid for his college. Now we're both mid-30s, comfortably comfortable financially. Jeff's always been a great friend. He was at my wedding and there for me when I got a divorce a few years later. Okay, the scene has been set. We got Jeff and the emailer friends since college. Lived together. He's a little more upper middle class. This guy's a little bit more lower middle class, I guess you would call it. But friends. And now they're doing well in their 30s and his friend got him through a divorce. Okay. I recently started dating a new woman, Andrea, over the. Over the few months. Over the few months. And and are officially boyfriend and girlfriend as of three weeks ago. So Andrea in the emailer. Boyfriend, girlfriend as of three weeks ago. I pretty much always dated women of color and my ex wife was light Skinned, but would, but would be considered a racial minority. My new girlfriend is African American. It's early on, but it's the first woman I've called my girlfriend since my divorce a couple years back and has long, long term potential. Well, this is very good. Good for you. Jeff and his girlfriend Katie came to stay with me and met Andrea for the first time over the past weekend. Everything was great until at my place after the bars, the conversation of the Kendrick Lamar performance came up. Man, this halft is, is, is, is just at the center of many conversations. And we've talked about it here. Ticked off Tuesday. It was a lot of, you know, people have written in about it. Okay, we, we'd all been drinking, but Jeff was definitely the drunkest. He had an unexpected reaction. He had, he had an unexpected reaction. He said, I thought it. This is kind of okay. Jeff was definitely the drunkest. He. I'm gonna think, I think this says he had, I have, he had a, he had an unexpected reaction. He said, I thought it sucked. He said he didn't get the subliminal undertones and thought it was silly that the world that there would even be some sort of message and said Kendrick Amar should just be a man and say what he wants to say on the biggest stage. Okay, I, I don't, I don't agree with that. I, listen, I, I, it was my opinion that it was a good Kendrick Lamar concert, bad super bowl halftime show. But that opinion, you know, over time, I, you know, then you have people tell me like, this meant that and this meant that. And I'm like, good. I get it. But as far as, like person watching me at a bar with it on the tv, you're waiting for something to happen. And I'm not really understanding the message. When I hear the message later, it's not be a man and say it, I go, oh, okay. That was the message. That was the reason. I think to me, and this was what my ticked off Tuesday was about, was like this person, the friend even having the friend even saying it sucked. Like, I don't know. That's kind of like a weird review for like, I don't know why the super bowl halftime show would personally offend you. You can go, oh, I guess it wasn't for me. Or I didn't get it. And I was kind of waiting for like the fun of a Super bowl halftime to happen. And it never really happened for me. I think there's. And I think the reason he goes into that fucking sucked versus the tenor. The discussion afterwards has Been difficult because if you didn't get it, it's like, well, you know, you kind of get considered evil bad guy, you know, not trying. And if you did get it, you were almost, you could be perceived as, you know, a little bit like higher minded and you're in the know. I don't know. I, I, I, it's funny like the, what he's saying, I understand why he is got his fists up because it was like this choice of like get it and agree with it or you're an evil. And he's probably like, well I'm not an evil, but go fuck yourself. You know, like it's like, but I don't, I don't agree. He's saying again, it is okay. Also like when you're doing an artistic expression, doing it artistically is the expression that isn't like, like I don't understand what he thinks. I just disagree with what he's saying. Kendrick Lamar should be a man and say what he wants to say on the biggest stage. He did, he, he did it in an artistic way. That's art. So I, I think the premise of his, you can sell. He's emotionally, emotionally hit by this some, in some way by the, if you didn't get it, you're a fucking asshole of it all, which I kind of understand. And now he's lashing out. If I'm being empathetic again, I'm being empathetic to the, to the asshole. In the story, Andrea expressed that she so this is the new girlfriend express that she felt like from a black point of view, Kendrick maybe felt that he wasn't able to direct, be direct about his message and that the viewpoint that you can say whatever you want on national TV is a privilege, privilege perspective. Yeah, I would say that, I would agree with that. And I also think it's art, like that's just, it's not artistic to just say fuck this, you know, fuck Donald Trump or whatever it was. It wasn't aggressive, more of a, I think about different background sort of way. So he's saying that his girlfriend was having, was disagreeing in a, in a healthy way. Well, Jeff got pretty defensive about it, maybe made some general dismissive comments about Andrea's opinion and went back and forth for a while with Jeff saying free speech is free speech and Andrea pointing out a lot of black people don't see it that way. And me and Katie were also attempting to get Jeff to consider Andrea's side. It got uncomfortable, but there wasn't any yelling or aggression and Ended with an I agree to disagree. Ooh, the. The dreaded agree to disagree. I tried it to. I tried to talk to Jeff privately about it later that night and he just had a lot of comments like quote unquote. So I'm privileged and I should just shut up. And my opinion does. And my opinion doesn't matter since I'm privileged, I should just give minorities my money. Oh my God. This guy went on a tirade. I'm not raised. I think all races should have equal opportunities, etc. There was really no resolution and all we all just went to bed after that. Not sure how much detail Jeff remembered, but the next day he did apologize to Andrea, saying, sorry about last night. I was told, I was told. I bulldozed the conversation. So he was talked to by his girlfriend. It never came up again. And the rest of the weekend was pretty fun and friendly. That's hard for me to believe. This was a blow up. It feels like, but I'll believe you. While I don't think Jeff is racist, this highlighted we have fundamental differences. I've always known he was more conservative and I'm sure the alcohol had something to do with it, but this made me feel bummed out. Yeah, this is a bummer. Whether it's my current girlfriend or somebody else, I think I'll end up with another person of color and also know Jeff will continue to be an important friend. I'm hoping you have some advice about how to navigate and maintain a friendship while being much more aware of some underlying differences on subjects that are pretty meaningful. Thanks. Love you. A bummed out buddy. Well, I appreciate you coming to me with this email. I'm probably the last person whose opinion people would want on this subject. You're writing to a guy who, with admitted privileges and a very nice life that I feel very lucky for having. So it is not every day that, you know, what do you think about this guy who hates being called privileged? You know, I don't know. I feel uncomfortable answering this, but I also like, weirdly, I see this guy Jeff. And again, what I said before, like, I do think the tenor around the halftime show boiled down to agree with it. That you know, to it was it. I don't think it looked good from any angle. I think if you watch a show, a halftime show, and a message sneaks up on you and you don't see that message, I don't think that makes you an evil person. I think when you're told that was the message and you go, oh, I guess I didn't see that. I. Okay, I guess that's. That. That halftime show did speak to someone. I get what they were trying to do. I think that's okay too. I think to. When you hear. When you say it fucking sucks in that way, I think you're emotionally touched by it. You. You feel, you know, when you don't know something, you. You're lashing out with anger, you know, you know, it's an end fear. So if I'm to give you, like, you know, when he talks about the privileged stuff, that is a word that. That really sets people off because I think with him, he's, you know, again, he's revealing his insecurities. And if you want to keep a friendship with him, I think it's okay to be like, I'm disappointed. And again, like, listen, I'm now into rambled. I'm rambling a little bit. But I. Because I do want to, like, hit on a couple points, I guess. And it's to say, you know, when you get into the privilege conversation, I think from his perspective, his fear is like, I can do nothing to make. He even mentioned. He even says, I'm not racist. I think all races should have equal opportunities. So since I'm privileged, should I just give minorities my money? Like, I. That is him speaking how. He's like, really? What he's probably. I'm thinking he's annoyed by. By the privileged conversation is he's saying, there's nothing I can do, but, you know, say, what am I supposed to do here? I don't know what to do. And it's like sometimes that whole privilege thing and like, acknowledging it is more of a vibe than doing something at all. And that's really hard. That's. I think, from the point of view of the privileged person, you go, I hope I don't come off like someone who doesn't acknowledge that they're very lucky and they appreciate the life that they were born into. And then you just kind of have to hope and you can't really. You can't really force again, like, what he is supposed to do. I think he's grasping at that. So if I'm to give him the empathy of that, like, there's people on TikTok. I see this on TikTok all the time, where you see these people who are influencers and they're. And you go. And it is annoying that it doesn't seem that they acknowledge their privilege. Like, you know, I see these tiktokers, they say that they're young people in their 20s and 30s saying that they're snowbirds, that they go from New York to Florida, you know, during the seasons to, you know, and. But with no acknowledgment that, like, no one in their 20s and 30s has ever done that really. That was a retired person thing to do. That's something. That's something people with money and of means and have worked their whole lives to accomplish do. And when you see these tiktoks, you go, the vibe isn't there, that there's no acknowledgment of, like, the privilege that's going on there. So I do understand, like, when you go. When you don't see someone acknowledging it, you go. They come off annoying. And again, your friend here who you dealt with isn't acknowledging it in a way that, like, is a thoughtful conversation. So he's got his fists up so hard during this super bowl thing as he showed with, like, I thought it fucking sucked, like, even to say it that way. That shows your fists are up. So I think if I'm you and you want to keep this friendship, which it sounds like you do, the way to go at Jeff is the way he came at the conversation and how disappointed you are in that. I don't think people are speedboat speedboats. I don't think Jeff is going to. This. This friend of yours is just going to turn on a dime and become this different person. I do think that they are cruise ships that they turn little by little. And. And I think today's world, I think we don't give any. Like, I think it's very. It's not often that we give credit to that, to how hard it is for people to change and come towards the other opinion that they never really grew up with. So, you know, I was watching Love is Blind. Love is Blind. These two sisters are talking. You know, they're a lesbian couple, and they're talking to the guy, the girl Sarah and the guy she met in the pods. And, like, they really kind of hammer on this dude who's, like, there, like, he's having the conversation with them, and they talk about him in front of him. They're not even including it. Just if you go watch that scene, like, and they're saying things that are correct, the words are correct, but the conversation isn't really there. It's not both ways. They're just hammering. I'm like. And I said it on the review of Love is Blind that we did on the UF podcast on our YouTube. I just was, like, watching this guy become a Trump voter. Like, I was just watching him, like, because it wasn't even like he was spoken with. And I think with your friend, I think you can speak with him and go, hey, when you say something fucking sucks, that doesn't even seem like you're having a conversation with people that might disagree with you. You're not even letting people talk to you. And that's what it felt like that. That night was. It either sucked or there was no other opinion. Or you. You know, that it either sucked or you're going to make me evil. And it's like, no one was there to make you evil. Everyone was there to be your friend. I'm there to, like, get you to get to know my new girlfriend, who I really like and see a future with. And you didn't even give that a chance by even, like, wading into the water of this very difficult conversation. That's what I would say to him. Not about his opinion. Listen, if you thought it wasn't great, that's okay. But the way you said it was like, it was. It was fisticuffs. Right away when you say. And again, you have the quotes. You wrote them down. Because you wrote it to me. Kendrick Lamar should just be a man and say what he wants to say on the biggest stage. Do you hear yourself, dude? That's not a conversation. That is you yelling your opinion at other people. An opinion that is. That is like, that is divisive. So again, like. And so I think that's the thing to come at your friend with, I think is to say, like, hey, man, it's been on my mind. It's been on my mind. You and I don't have to agree 100% on everything, but you do have to respect the people that I bring into the conversation that I want to like you. You didn't even care for them to like you in the way you discuss this with us. That would be me. And again, I feel like the least. I feel like the least. The person people want to hear from the least on the subject. And I don't know this, to me, because what happens on this subject, and I'm sure this is a thing your friend is afraid of, so he's not showing any, you know, anyone can just. Again, this is back to the morality of the Internet that I talked about earlier. Like, when. If you say, like, hey, I didn't really think the. I don't think the halftime show is, like, where I would, you know, come to. To change my mind on a subject. Oh, I. I didn't really know the backstory. And, yeah, I guess. I guess I could see what is trying to be said. But. And if someone says, well, if you didn't get it, you're a fucking evil racist monster, it's like, I guess you can say that, you know, like. And listen. Someone could listen to this and go, look at Jared's giving empathy to this piece of shit. And it's like, some people aren't here for the conversation. That's okay. I have that with you up all the time. We talked about Matt James breaking up with Rachel Karconnell, and I was, like, giving. And I said, I was like, if I'm to give, like, you know, the mindset of what this guy is probably thinking through, I can give some perspective. And then people are like, who even cares about what he's going through? It's like, then you didn't want to have this conversation. That's okay. That's a different podcast. So I do think going to your friend, hey, man, it's been on my mind. It's been on my mind. I'm thinking about the other night a lot. And it's not that you didn't like the halftime show. That's. That's not my concern. My concern is that the way you went about having a discussion about really 10 subjects with someone I'm introducing you to wasn't done with warmth. Wasn't done with, like, empathy. Wasn't done with even, like, seeing another person's side. It seemed that you were fearful that we were gonna, like, call you out and make you into this evil person. We weren't there to do that. We were there just talking about the halftime show, and you took it into this different territory of a street brawl when it could have just been, you know, really. It could have been smart people who love each other having a nice conversation and discussing something that's just in the. The general, you know, zeitgeist. So that's my opinion. I hope that's helpful. I don't know if it is. And Mailbag Monday. We're here every Monday. Back next week. Boom.