The JTrain Podcast: T-Shirt Guns, Divorce Settlements, and Kiss Cams

Host: Jared Freid
Date: August 21, 2025
Theme: A whirlwind tour through pop culture’s wildest headlines, featuring Jared’s signature blend of comedy and real talk—tackling topics from celebrity sexuality clarifications to the primal madness of T-shirt guns and the etiquette of divorce settlements.

Overview

This Pop Culture Thursday sees Jared Freid riffing through handpicked wild and weird stories from Page Six and beyond. He covers everything from Julia Fox’s confusing sexuality updates, TikTok star King Beard X’s passing, Jay Cutler and Kristin Cavallari’s messy divorce money talk, the animalistic frenzy surrounding T-shirt guns, to the viral drama of Coldplay’s infamous kiss cam outing cheaters.
Jared blends hot takes, relatable humor, and a persistent plea for common sense and empathy—while occasionally admitting when he’s just as confused by these headlines as the rest of us.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Julia Fox’s Sexuality Clarification (15:21)

• Headline: Julia Fox clarifies her sexuality after coming out as a lesbian.
• Jared’s Take: The need to “clarify” after coming out baffles him, wondering who actually demands such explanations.
• Deep Dive:
  • Julia first identified as a lesbian, now says she’s pansexual (“I could be attracted to anyone and anything”).
  • Jared tries to understand pansexuality and reflects on how confusing these discussions can become, especially with public figures who seem to still be figuring things out.
  • Memorable Quote: “I’m here listening, learning. I am talking while learning. So I do understand where someone would be like, just shut the fuck up.” – Jared (20:47)
  • Expresses empathy but also some fatigue with over-explanation and media sensationalism.

2. TikTok Star King Beard X’s Passing (26:35)

• Headline: TikTok star John Crawley, known as King Beard X, dead at 47.
• Jared’s Take: He cringes at being remembered for social media handles or embarrassing self-bestowed nicknames after death.
• Discussion:
  • Notes the difference between a respectful obituary and a clickbait headline.
  • Points out the practical realities—fundraisers for burial, the role of chosen family when there’s no spouse.
  • Uses this as a springboard to his own fears about posthumous legacy.
  • Memorable Quote: “All of my names would be very embarrassing in death. How about you play this when I die–me being angry that anyone used a nickname that I— I know I gave myself these nicknames, but...I don’t want them used in my death.” – Jared (29:42)

3. Jay Cutler vs. Kristin Cavallari (34:21)

• Headline: Jay Cutler claims reckless ex Kristin Cavallari lied about divorce settlement: ‘Borderline slander.’
• Jared’s Take: Jay’s public griping is unwinnable in the court of public opinion and only cements his “douchebag face.”
• Discussion:
  • Jay Cutler claims Kristin’s assertion she “didn’t get a dime” is false; Jared pokes fun at both the language and the semantics.
  • Breaks down how wealth division in celebrity divorces works, noting Jay’s NFL earnings and how marital assets get split.
  • Suggests Cutler should walk away from the internet and enjoy his millions, instead of engaging in social media battles.
  • Quote: “Jay’s demeanor, not helpful. Jay’s general outlook on life, probably not helpful to his cause...in the world of social media—you’re not going to win this one.” – Jared (36:33)

4. T-Shirt Gun Madness: Woman Bites Child for Freebie (43:15)

• Headline: Woman in her 50s allegedly bit child, six, in Hampton’s tussle over free concert T-shirt.
• Jared’s Take: The T-shirt gun is a catalyst for primal frenzy—it transforms people, granting “ultimate power, ultimate corruption.”
• Discussion:
  • Recaps a listener’s previous email about “t-shirt gun etiquette,” then delves into a real-life incident where a woman bit a child during a beach concert.
  • Uses it as a comedic, cautionary tale about mob mentality and absurdity–everyone, shooter and seeker, becomes “hopped up” on T-shirt gun adrenaline.
  • Calls out event organizers for fueling the chaos: “There is no reason for them to have a T-shirt cannon.”
  • Memorable Quote: “A T-shirt gun will make people into someone they didn’t know they were...With great power comes great responsibility.” – Jared (44:54)
  • Demands jail time and a picture of the perpetrator, promising to keep following the (frankly ridiculous) story.

5. Austin Butler’s “Fearless” Bee Rescue (55:05)

• Headline: Fearless Austin Butler rescues Zoe Kravitz from aggressive bee at ‘Kimi’ premiere.
• Jared’s Take: Headlines are ridiculous for attributing malice or heroism to a bee encounter.
• Discussion:
  • Mocks Page Six’s dramatization of Butler “facing off” with an “aggressive” bee.
  • Compares his own hypothetical reaction (“Time’s most unfuckable list if they got pictures of me with a bee”) to Butler’s calm demeanor.
  • Quote: “To call the bee aggressive is just actually crazy.” – Jared (55:37)

6. Tamar Braxton’s Mysterious Accident (57:42)

• Headline: Tamar Braxton found in pool of blood with fractured nose, missing teeth after ‘mysterious’ near-death experience.
• Jared’s Take: Questions the “pray for me” Insta request without full context; suggests “good vibes appreciated” is a better ask of strangers.
• Discussion:
  • Expresses sympathy but wants more transparency before offering performative concern.
  • Quote: “That takes a level of confidence...You’re asking for people who just follow you on Instagram to pray for you.” – Jared (58:59)

7. Coldplay Kiss Cam Drama (1:01:42)

• Headline: Chris Martin defends keeping Coldplay kiss cam at concerts despite astronomer CEO cheating scandal.
• Jared’s Take: Defends the kiss cam’s right to exist; the problem isn’t the feature, it’s those who get caught being messy.
• Discussion:
  • Ties back to the earlier t-shirt gun rant: Do not abolish fun because of a few bad actors.
  • Fans love the tradition; it’s not responsible for outing cheaters. Emphasizes keeping silly, fun things in public events.
  • Memorable Quote: “This is not your fault. This is not the kiss cam’s fault. People need to know there’s a kiss cam going around. If you’re going to cheat, do it in the bathroom.” – Jared (1:02:32)

Notable Quotes (with Timestamps)

• On overcomplicating sexuality labels:

  “I’m not trying to be dumb. One year after coming out as a lesbian, the actress clarified to Allure that she could be attracted to anyone and anything. Anything?...This is like, to me, a bad premise for a hacky joke. Like: what’s next— you and the couch?” (18:55, Julia Fox riff)

• On legacy and embarrassing nicknames:

  “How about we should all be able to write our own death headlines? ...I don’t want in death to be remembered...by handles.” (27:20)

• On divorce settlements and public sympathy:

  “Jay’s face, not helpful. Jay’s demeanor, not helpful...But in the world of social media—you’re not going to win this one.” (36:10)

• On the madness of T-shirt cannons:

  “A T-shirt gun will make people into someone they didn’t know they were...With great power comes great responsibility.” (44:54)

• On ‘aggressive’ bees:

  “To call the bee aggressive is just actually crazy.” (55:37)

• On “pray for me” culture:

  “That takes a level of confidence...You’re asking for people who just follow you on Instagram to pray for you.” (58:59)

• On defending the Kiss Cam:

  “Do not stop the kiss cam. This is not your fault. This is not the kiss cam’s fault. People need to know there’s a kiss cam going around. If you’re going to cheat, do it in the bathroom.” (1:02:32)

Timestamps for Key Segments

| Time | Segment | |-----------|----------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 15:21 | Julia Fox’s sexuality and pansexual confusion | | 26:35 | TikTok star King Beard X obituary and social media legacy | | 34:21 | Jay Cutler vs. Kristin Cavallari: Divorce settlement drama | | 43:15 | T-shirt gun bedlam: Woman bites child for a freebie at a beach concert | | 55:05 | Austin Butler “fearlessly” rescues Zoe Kravitz from a bee | | 57:42 | Tamar Braxton’s mysterious accident and the “pray for me” dilemma | | 1:01:42 | Coldplay’s Kiss Cam continues despite cheating scandal controversy |

Tone & Takeaway

Jared moves expertly from eye-rolling pop culture fatigue to genuine empathy, all with a stand-up’s wit and a knack for exposing hypocrisy and absurdity. He pokes fun but never gets mean, often looping each story back to a relatable human experience or his own neuroses.

Final Note:
For more wild headlines and unapologetically honest takes, catch Pop Culture Thursdays on The JTrain Podcast. And if you see a T-shirt gun in the wild—watch your arms (and your kids).