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A
Hi there, Billy Hindle here, the voice of Alice in the Magnus Protocol. I'm here to let you know that Rustyquill will be attending UK Games Expo at the Birmingham NEC this May 29 to May 31. We are hosting two free shows along with our friends at Montecut Games and Indie Boards and Cards. If you come along to the Monte Cook game stand at the Expo, you will be able to demo the Magnus Archives Roleplaying game and the Magnus Protocol Mysteries game and grab a copy for yourself. You can find out more about our shows@rustedquill.com expo that's rustyquill.com expo. You will need a ticket for entry to the UK Games Expo, but once inside Rustyquill shows and demos are 100% free on a first come first served basis.
B
Hi everyone, it's Lori, voice of Celia in the Magnus Protocol. Today we are sharing an exciting episode from one of the podcasts on the RQ Network, Gals and Goblins. Gals n Goblins is an actual play TTRPG podcast that loosely follows the rules of Dungeons and Dragons and strictly follows the rule of cool. It's the first day of school in this first episode titled All Aboard the Owlcat Bus. Meet the Sawyer Cinderfoot Morahan star Maddy Lamb Esther of House Ruadon, Campbell Duffy and beans Olivia Rose McCain as they embark on their first adventure together on their way to Frogmont Adventuring Academy. For will they make it to Lorelei Village? What will they encounter on their first adventure in the magical realm of Eldravil? They don't know exactly what the future holds, but we can assure you there will be shenanigans and friendship galore. To listen to more brilliant episodes, search Gals n Goblins. Wherever you listen to podcasts, click the link in the show notes or find more information@rustedquill.com have fun and enjoy the episode.
C
Welcome to Gals and Goblins, an adventure podcast that loosely follow the rules of Dungeons and Dragons and strictly follows the rules of cool. I am your gobble master, Jared Foswinkle and with me are the gals Lily
D
Perclefield Sawyer Cinderfoot, the future arcana ball champion of Frogmont Academy.
C
Hell yeah.
E
Maddy Lamb, Morgan Star, Frogmont's cutest dose
F
of chaos Campbell Duffy, esther of House Ruidon, the 15th child of the Lord and Lady of Stormbreak and Olivia Rose
G
McCain Banes running towards the school bell like cats outs of Hell.
C
Alright, welcome to the realm of Eldrivae. Only decades ago, the magical continent was plunged into war between the stars and the Hells Over a mysterious object to prepare future generations, the family of Eldravael send their children to the great adventuring academies on quests of profound importance. However, after years without conflict, these schools have delved into shells of their former prestige. Our story begins with four unlikely heroes.
E
Oh, wait, that's cute.
C
All right. So the sun is just starting to rise. We see rays of pink and oranges peering over the horizon. We see a little halfling girl standing on the side of a road next to a sign with a frog like creature on it called a bullywug. The halfling's name is Sawyer Cinderfoot. Lily, would you like to describe your character?
D
Sawyer is a very round, stout halfling. She has two thick braids and bangs that cut straight across her forehead. And then she has round rosy cheeks and round wire glasses. She's wearing a hand me down Frogmont letterman jacket over her uniform. And from behind her right shoulder, kind of poking out, is the handle of an ornate longsword.
C
Hell yeah. Great. Great description. Okay.
D
And she's vibrating with excitement.
C
So you've only ever really seen the regular bus stop here, the one that you're at whenever it took you to school. It comes much later than the time that you're at. It's very early in the morning. But this is where the acceptance letter told you to go to be at the bus stop. What is Sawyer thinking right now? Like you said, you're vibrating and stuff. What's going on in that little halfling head of yours?
D
Sawyer is kind of going over. I think she's going over what she's going to write in her journal tonight. And if you were to come up and ask her what her day has looked like so far, she would say,
C
something interrupts this thought real quick. Give me a perception check.
G
It's a five.
C
Okay. At this point, you start getting like a weird feeling, like kind of in the pity or stuff. Like you're like. You don't know what the feeling is. Is it like, oh, am I nervous to go? Is something going to happen? Like, what's like you start kind of feeling uneasy?
D
Yeah. No, just the thought of a crystal ball.
C
Like someone is maybe like watching you or something. What do you want to do?
D
I guess, are there any just kind of whirl around and maybe like, is there kind of like a bus stop that I can look behind?
C
So to describe it a little bit more, the entire neighborhood is behind you. So those little hobbit holes that are kind of cookie cutter houses almost. So if something was watching you, you would think the only way of COVID would be from the houses behind you.
D
Okay, weird. I guess I don't want to trespass, but can I just kind of creep up over there?
C
Yeah. So? Well, I'm gonna say so. As you turn around, you see this large figure jumping from the tops of the houses like the hills over. And you can't really see, but as it gets close, you hear it is strong and very agile. You see two floating glowing orbs that are on this thing.
D
I'm gonna yell up at it, hey, are you going to Frogmont too? I'm waiting for them to pick me up.
C
This thing picks up speed. And you also see that it has wings on its back. And you now see that it has these paws that are like a big cat. And it has these talons that are like a bird coming out of it. And its face looks like a tawny owl. And the glowing orbs are its eyes. And it has this kind look to its face, its little owl face. And on its back is this bus like thing. And it just jumps and jumps and jumps and jumps until it gets up next to you. And you see that weirdly enough, there is an inside to it that looks like a bus. And there is a little goblin who has long pointy ears and a tiny nose. And he has these thick glasses on his face that are like bottles basically. They pull up to the bus stop and he goes like, lay all aboard.
E
Oh, hey.
D
Looks like you are going to Frogmont.
C
Yeah, get on in.
D
Thanks.
C
As you get up, like the little, the this owl cat, like the inside like opens up and like these stairs kind of form out of fur and you climb on in and this little goblin reaches his hand and he goes. Hi, my name's Gilbo.
D
Hi, Gilbo. My name's Sawyer. It's very nice to meet you.
C
Nice to meet you.
D
I'm going to Frogmont.
C
Oh, well, I'm going. I mean, I guess I'll take you to Frogmont. Well, I'll get you as close as I can to Frogmont, but yeah, you're on your way to Frogmong.
G
Oh, wow. I can't believe it. Thank you so much.
C
You sit down in one of the fur covered seats on this Owlcat bus and you guys take off. We are now going to transition to this mountainside where we settle in on some docks that are hanging off the side of the cliff. And it looks like shipping docks, but they have their own bus stops. Campbell, would you like to describe your character?
F
Esta is a very tall elf. She has short little Pointed ears, very long features, bright blue eyes, and the longest blond hair you've ever seen. She has very intricate braids at the top of her head. And she is wearing sort of a silvery blue shirt with a little bow at the top of the buttons.
C
So you're standing at these kind of docks. There is four bus stops. There's one that's furthest away from you. You can't really discern what it is. It's made out of brass, but it's dirty and it's grimy, and it looks like no one's even looked at it. And who knows how many years. There's one closer to you that is a large black rock formation. And you can kind of see a sign on it that says Brimstone Academy. And then the one that's further to your left is this beautiful golden sign with these light blue accents that says Valkyrie high on it. And then the one in front of you is this very small, wooden, uncared for sign that has a picture of a bullywug on it.
F
I'm kind of standing in front of all of them. I can either choose the bus stop that's going to take me to Weaselby, where I would have to attend school for six years before being transferred to Valkyrie, where all of my 14 older siblings have gone.
C
You are completely alone on this dock, and so do you. Walk up to the.
F
Very carefully walk up to the Frogmont one, because I realized how rickety it is.
C
So you walk up to it, and the sign is at your feet. And as soon as you get close to the edge, this rush of wind goes over you as this giant owl cat thing flies in front of you, circles around, and then lands right in front of the dock. And then you see a little goblin and a halfling inside. And the goblin says, frogmut.
F
Yes, please.
C
All right, get on in.
F
I step in.
C
Y' all see each other now. What do you.
G
Hi.
D
You must be going to Frogmut.
F
Yes. Hello.
D
Well, I'm Sawyer. Nice to meet you.
F
I'm Esta. Nice to meet you, too.
D
I bet you're so excited. I am, too. And don't let my letterman jacket freak you out. I'm sure they'll have a uniform for you. This is actually my mom's. It's a hand me down.
F
That's wonderful. Do you mind if I sit next to you?
D
Oh, yeah, sure. Come on.
G
Okay.
C
And with that, we are going to transition over to this dense forest. There are these very tall trees that have these bioluminescent flowers and vines. A lot of castles. Very pretty, foresty kind of vibe going on. We see a bunch of leaves falling from these trees and we go to a singular bus stop with a bullywug on it. Maddie, would you like to describe your character? Yeah.
E
Morgan is. She's a cute little elf. She's around 5 8. And she's definitely shiny from running through the forest. She's got like these medium length elf ears that like, are definitely disproportional to her face size.
C
Aww.
E
She's got this really long red hair and these really bright green eyes like the forest around her. And she likes to wear like, green capes and green clothes to match the forest. And she's got a sprinkle of freckles all throughout her face.
C
Awesome. Okay, so Morrigan, you're standing there in the forest and you start hearing seeds hitting the ground around you. You look up because one barely misses your head, and you see this kind of bigger seed. It's still probably half the size of your palm. And it's like flittering down as it has kind of a split sprout coming out of the top of it. And it has these two leaves that are kind of acting as propellers as it floats down. You also notice that it has little legs. It's trying hard to figure out where to land. What do you do?
E
I go and I hold my hand out to act as a landing for this little guy.
C
This little guy lands on your hand. It's just a large seed with little legs with a sprout out of it. And then it just kind of nestles into your hand. And as it touches your hand, give me an arcana.
E
Check 13.
C
Okay. There's something. Obviously there's something magical about this seed. You don't know what it is exactly yet, but it almost restores you a little bit from your run. You know, you said that you were sweaty from running it. It kind of makes you less fatigued. And as you're looking down at the seed, you don't even notice that a giant owl cat bus has landed in front of you. And there is now a halfling and another elf. Right. And a goblin in this bus. And they're like, you going to Frogmont.
E
I look up from the little seed that I have definitely been staring at this entire time and go, oh, hi.
C
Hi, Frogmouth. Yes or no? Hey, we got a schedule to keep.
E
Oh, yeah, I got it. Let me grab my backpack real quick.
C
Okay. Are you. Is it on the ground or.
E
Yeah, yeah, I left it like you left it.
C
Okay, well, we Gotta go. We. You know what? Forget the backpack. Forget the backpack. We gotta go. All right, get on. Okay, you get on. And now you see this halfling and
D
this other elf, another wug joins the bunch. God.
E
Hi.
D
Hi. I'm Sawyer.
E
Hi, I'm Morrigan.
F
I'm Esta.
E
It's nice to meet y'. All.
D
Yeah, nice to meet you too. You can squeeze in on our bench if you want.
E
Okay. I walk over and I plop myself right in between them on top of all their legs.
C
Alrighty. So you guys are all sitting in this chair. And the owlcat blasts off into the sky. Gilbo looks back, he goes, well, all right, that's everyone. Time to make it our way to Frogmont. And you guys start flying. You guys fly for some time, probably like an hour. You guys are kind of chasing the sun so it's still dark beneath you. And then you see off into the distance, fire erupt from the forest. Flash of red. It goes streaking across the sky. The owlcat bus yowlows a little bit. And Guilbo goes, now calm down there, Sarah. Calm down. And I had another name for it, but I forgot what it was.
D
I'm so glad.
C
Sara starts just yowling and aiming towards this comeuppance that's happening in the forest. Everyone give me perception checks.
G
Eight, I think we've been.
C
Is that in that one?
D
Yes.
C
Well, it's just a perception check, but
E
I have plus five to perception.
C
Plus five. You're so scared. You are, like, in between the seats. What'd you get, Esther? Sixteen. Okay. Your eyes go towards that streak of red that's flying across the sky. And it's going back and forth. And that is the thing that is, like, causing these fires. You see it that it is a giant red sword that is glowing. You see it go out and then it comes back to a giant gauntleted hand. And you look at this being and it's about 7 foot tall. It has this rotting armor with barbed wire that is wrapped around it and this huge door like shield. And then it catches the sword and then it throws it out again, like 40 or 50ft. And then you follow where it's throwing it at. And then you see a smaller figure running through the bushes. Olivia, would you like to describe your character?
G
Yes. Beans is a small little Tabaxi boy standing about 3ft tall. Imagine if you took just a little kitty that drank too much milk and put him up on its hind legs. And that is exactly what Beans looks like. Too full of milk at all times. His fur is, like, just the dingiest brown you've ever seen. And, like, it's weird because cats aren't usually just brown, but he's just brown. And he has yellow little eyes, and he just has, like, black, like, wraps around his arms and his hands. But that's it. That's all his clothes.
C
Okay, do you see this little cat guy running for his freaking life away from this giant demonic knight that is running after him? What do you do, Gilbo? Yeah, what's up?
F
I think there's someone down there that we should help.
C
Listen, y', all, I got a tight schedule that I need to keep, so I don't know if we can just make it.
F
Well, can't you see what's happening?
C
Sarah just, like.
F
Sarah agrees with me.
D
Gilba, there's someone in danger.
C
Gilba's like, all right. And then it's like. It's a steering wheel, but it's just Sarah's, like, fur skin, basically. So he just kind of tugs on it to the right. As y' all bank down and start flying above this little cat that's running.
F
Can I reach my hands out of the window?
C
Yeah.
F
Is it, like, catless?
C
Yeah. Sarah, like, opens up her, like, little windows, and you can reach out, out for Beans.
F
Okay. I have both my hands out reaching for this little cat.
G
Beans. Beans is running as fast as little legs can carry him. He goes, yes, yes. I'll take him.
C
Hey, the. The sword flies in between your hands, and then it, like, causes a fire, like, all the way up ahead, and then it flies back in between yalls hands. You guys, so you, like, grab on to each other.
F
Yeah.
C
Okay. You pull Beans into. Into Sarah, and you'll start flying away, and you. You just immediately pull up and away from this figure. And as you guys look back, you see the sun touches this giant creature, and it, like, is staring up at Sarah and you guys, and it just, like, dissolves into dust as the sun touches it. Y' all are all on this bus now.
D
So that just happened.
E
Morrigan stands up from between the seats and goes, what just happened?
G
Beans is going to stand up, dust himself off, and be like, thank you for grabbing me. And then look, he looks at his pocket. No, he doesn't. He doesn't have a pocket.
C
Do you have pockets in.
G
In his fur pocket that he has?
C
Yeah.
G
Pulls out a little journal and looks at it. It's like, okay. And then puts it back, and he goes, hello. My name Beans. What is. Hello.
D
Hi. I'm Sawyer.
G
Hell. Hello, Sawyer. What everybody else name?
E
I'm Morgan.
G
Morgan.
E
Yes.
F
Esther.
G
Thank you, Esther. Thank you for. Your hands are very soft.
C
That.
D
Yeah, that was a good hustle. Esta.
F
Thank you.
E
I'm still not quite sure what happened, but that's okay.
D
Well, we got a new. Long story short, we got a new passenger.
F
Our first heroic moment, I think of the. Of the year of our Frogmont.
G
Oh, that.
D
Oh, yeah.
G
I could have taken guess that. Yeah.
D
Who was that guy?
C
As you say, like, I could have taken that guy. And who was that guy? Give me perception checks,
D
please.
G
One.
E
That's a nine.
F
Four twelve.
C
Okay, you guys keep flying and I'll make a roll. Okay. Just as Gilbo says, hang on. This, like, blast hits Sarah, and Sarah, like, lets out a yelp. And you guys can now see there's like, y'.
G
All.
C
Y' all have been flying, like, in between these hills. And in the shadows of one of the hills, the giant knight is standing. The barbed wire knight is standing there with his sword. And he catches it back again. And Gilbo's like, oh, we gotta get the. We gotta get out of do.
G
Okay, okay. Maybe Beans was over exaggerating a bit. That guy was a little bit of problem.
C
You said, Dwight, you could take him. You can take him, right? Maybe you need to get off Sarah and take care of them.
G
I was maybe hyperbolizing.
F
What?
C
Stop saying those big words at me.
G
Over exaggerating. I'm sorry, didn't get your name.
C
Gilbo.
G
Gilbo. Hello.
C
Hello. And this is Sarah. And he pats just around him.
G
Beans. Beans takes in the fact that Sarah is part cats and is like, I don't really. This is a bit of conflict of interest, but I'm just going to pretend it's not happening. Just like a lot of things. Anyway, we. I don't know, you guys fighters, what training you have?
C
You got your life.
G
Yeah.
C
Get jolted again as Sarah gets hit with another blast. And you guys are flying pretty high in the sky right now. And Gilbo looks at you guys and he's like, I don't. I don't know how much more Sarah can take. We gotta get out of here. Can y', all, like, throw something at her or throw at that guy or something?
G
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
D
I say, yeah, Beans, you could say I've been training my whole life. Then I say to Gilbo, okay, Gilbo, when I say the word, turn sideways and dump us out.
E
Wait, what?
G
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Just got off ground. I don't know if Beans.
C
He's like, I can't Let y' all out near that guy. He looks way too powerful.
G
Well, what if we trick him? Sarah, does she have stealth mode?
C
Sarah, do you have stealth mode? Y' all get somebody give me a luck check. It doesn't matter.
G
Beans will do it. It's a nine.
C
Okay, sorry, everyone. Sarah gets hit one more time with the sword, and Gilbo stands up and is like, I gotta get y' all out of here. It's my duty to take care of y' all and get y' all from point A to point B. We're gonna land over there at that little building. And you guys see a building on the top of a hill that's covered in the sun already. It's not like the. There's going to be no more shadows on it as the sun is coming up. And he goes, and then I'm going to drop you off, and then Sarah and I will distract this guy. How's that sound?
G
But what about Sarah?
E
I thought we need a ride.
D
Sarah's already taken a few hits. I think we can take this guy.
G
You train whole life. Yeah, Esther trained whole life. Yes, Morgan trained whole life.
E
Yeah, sure.
D
If we're talking arcado ball, I basically popped out of the womb.
C
Gilbert Gilba grabs. Grabs Beans and says, I'll distract him, make it to the coast, find Lorelei village. And then he shouts, all right, Sarah, we gotta go. And then Sarah tucks in her wings and flies straight down towards this building and flings you guys out in front of this building and then flies up and away from you.
G
Beans rolls way to you.
C
And that was like, all of you. You guys are all out of there. You guys tuck and roll out of this owlcat bus. And you guys see Sarah and Gilbo flying off into the distance. And you see the sword being thrown at them and then coming back and then being thrown at them again and then coming back.
D
Okay, wugs, let's hustle. If we make it to Lorelei village in time, we can.
G
I'm going to be honest. I don't think there will be much to help when we. You know what? Great idea. Yes. Let's go.
D
We're just gonna leave him to die?
F
What do you know about this person?
G
Not listen. Not much. But Bean's nose, not good. Sent by not good people. Beans is. Never mind. Let's go. Beans just takes off.
C
Okay, give me.
G
You can't imagine how.
C
Give me, like, a survival check, everyone.
G
13, 19, 5.
C
Okay, so. So you got like a 2022 then. Okay, you guys don't know where Lorelei village is. But Moragon remembered that it's on the coast. Okay, you guys are at in front of this, like, tiny hut and surrounded
G
by forest fans, is just running. I don't think it's quite towards the coast, but not quite towards the forest. It's a little. Okay, in between the two.
F
There was nobody in the hut.
C
You guys have not.
G
You tell me.
C
I almost thought of that. I've said that there's a hut. I've said that there's a hut and nothing around three times. You guys have not gave me an investigation.
F
There's probably someone who can help us in the hut.
G
Oh, Beans runs all the way back and go, oh, that's good idea, Beans.
C
Okay, you guys walk towards this hut. As you get closer, you can kind of hear music coming from within and talking, especially like, loud laughing as y' all walk towards this hut. And as you get closer, you see that it's actually an inn in a tavern called the Howling Goose. What do y' all do?
F
I walk straight in.
E
Yeah, I was gonna say Morrigan says, oh, music. And sprints.
C
Okay. You burst open into this tavern, and you see that there are quite a few people inside. It's really early morning, so there's a couple adventurers, like, quietly eating their breakfast. There is a Dragonborn barmaid who's behind the bar, and she looks like she's cooking up something. And then the loud voices that you hear are these three big barbarians who are in the middle at this table. There's a ton of empty flagons around them. They have a bag that's at their feet. They look like they've been up all night, just kind of causing a ruckus. And it looks also like. Give me an insight check.
G
Critical failure three.
C
Okay, 11. So you notice that everyone kind of looks sick of these barbarians in the middle. And the barmaid shoots y' all a look as y' all walk in. The biggest barbarian guy, he's in the middle of shouting like, oi, oh, lizard lady, where's our food? And then he notices you guys, and he's like, oi, get these nice young ladies whatever they want. Oh, nice. And then he throws some gold pieces into this flagon that already has some other gold in it. And there's leftover ale.
F
I make a wide berth around these barbarians, walk straight up to the Dragonborn barmaid, and I say, hello, we're looking for Lorelai Village. We're meant to go to Frogmont. We are completely lost. We ran into some trouble, and we just need some Directions getting to Lorelei village.
C
Yeah, well, I wish I could tell you where Lorelai village is, but that village has been hidden for about a hundred years.
E
Morrigan runs right up to the barbarians and goes, hey, yo, you paying? And picks up their glass of ale.
C
The biggest one, like, turns and slowly looks at you with, like, the mean look.
G
While that's happening, can Beans look at the bag? Right? You said there a was a bad.
C
Yeah, give me an investigation check.
E
Yeah.
G
Can he, like, do it stealthily, like.
C
Yeah, give me. Give me a self check.
G
Yeah. 11.
C
Okay, I'm gonna roll for them. They also got an 11 minus one. They're not very perceptive. They're not very wise. You can investigate so you aren't seen. Give me investigation check.
G
Noise. 11.
C
You feel it's. It's a pretty protected bag that they're keeping away from everyone else. It's, like, cinched up. If you want to investigate some more, I can say, but you're going to have to give me another stealth check.
E
I'm gonna. I'm gonna keep them occupied while Beans is looking through the bags and be like, hey, yo, so you said you're paying for one round, right? So, like, does that round start now?
C
I'll say you can roll with advantage.
G
Dirty 20.
C
Okay. You can tell, actually, let me just make sure. Okay. They got a 16 minus 1. 15. So you can tell that this bag is, like, moving slowly. And with a dirty 20, you can kind of hear like, a. Oh, my God. And then they look to you, Morgan. They're like, yeah, we should have some food coming over. And they look at the dragonborn, who is, like, finishing up their food and bringing it over.
D
I'm gonna go up to Morgan and kind of, like, kind of drag your arm and be like, hey, I don't think you should be drinking that.
E
Morgan's like, no, no, no, I got this. And then she's like, hey, yo, buddies, after we get some food in you, can we ask some questions?
G
Can beans.
C
What kind of questions? And then what?
G
Can beans uncinch the bag.
C
Give me a stealth check. I'll say, not advantage on this time.
F
17.
C
They got a nine. You can start, like, uncinching the bag. It's, like, tightened very tightly, like they clearly don't want what's getting out of this bag to get out. You can give me a sleight of hand check.
G
Can I. Like, is there anything I could roll to sense, like. Cause these guys seem like bad news. So is it probably something in this bag is not bad? Dude, like, can I do anything? Insight? I don't know. Is there anything?
C
Yeah, sure. Give me an insight check on the
D
lump in the bag.
G
Yes, I'd like to do an insight check on the lump. 18. These are that lump.
D
What are the vibes?
C
I'm just gonna say this. These are very rude men who are being super mean to this dragon born lady. And clearly like all of the bar in the tavern hate these guys. Probably because they've been loud all night. But these aren't good guys. And in the bag, if he's protecting it, you would assume that it's something that they want to keep or they don't want to be out against them. So maybe the enemy of my enemy is my friend or so to open it.
G
Did you say sleight of hand or could I like, muscle it open?
C
I say sleight of hand.
D
Get in there.
G
Oh, it's a nine.
C
Okay. You start fiddling with this thing, I'm gonna say, give me another stealth check with disadvantage.
E
Can I start talking to them?
C
He's been down there for a while. So seven, you feel this big meaty hand on your head. Oi. What are you doing down there?
G
Meow.
C
Whose cat is this?
F
Mew, that's mine. I'm so sorry.
C
He holds you up and he shakes you around a little bit. Yeah.
F
I very quickly run over and I pick him up by the armpits and
C
I like to take beans away. And good trick.
G
Yes,
C
There is this. One of the barbarians is like he was trying to look at our bag there.
F
And I would like to use the message cantrip.
C
Yeah.
F
So stealthily I'm going to point my finger at the one all the way on the left and I'm going to say, your friend to the right of
G
you has stolen all of your gold.
C
Since it's not a spell that alters their mind, since it's not like a charm or something like that, it just sounds like somebody whispered it to them.
F
Yeah.
C
Yeah. So give me a deception with disadvantage.
F
The first One was an 8 and the second one was a 15. So it's an 8.
C
He looks over at the guy next to him. He's like, eric, did you take my goat? And then Eric is gonna be like, no. And he's gonna be like, oh, who said that? Who? Who told me that someone took my gold?
D
Sawyer is still, like, dragging on vore's arm. And it's like, stranger danger. Didn't your parents ever tell you about stranger danger?
G
Meow.
E
Nope.
D
Good cat impression. Beans.
G
Meow.
C
Sorry.
E
You need to get out of here.
D
Wait, no, you need to get out of here.
E
I got a plan.
C
Do you want to see what's in the bag?
G
Me. Oh,
C
you see, he, like, reaches down for the bag, and then as he, like, straightens up, he, like, draws his sword so it looks like he was going for the bag. And he goes. Yeah, I tricked ya.
G
Me.
E
Can I see sneakily throw a sleeping dart? Oh.
C
I'm gonna say you can do this with a surprise round. And if they notice it, we're gonna start initiative, and it's gonna be bad.
F
You wanna start initiative?
E
No, but I feel like I've already made a decision.
C
Good.
E
Follow through.
C
Yeah. Roll to attack first.
D
Oh, my God. 5.
C
I think it will now roll. Stealth or sleight of hand.
E
I'm gonna try to different dice. That's a 20. That's a dirty 20.
C
Awesome. You throw this dart, and it, like, slams against a wooden wall, and, like, nobody notices. Everyone just kind of continues about their drinking. So we're not gonna enter initiative yet because nothing has happened. But these guys are standing over this bag. That bean's heard a whimper, felt it move.
D
But the rest of us did not hear that. Correct?
C
Yeah.
D
Whoa. You guys seem awfully protective of that bag.
C
Well, it's our stuff. Wouldn't we want to protect our stuff? Oh, you want me to take your sword from you?
D
No, you better back off. You already grabbed my friend, and that was over the line.
C
Yeah, exactly. So don't grab my bag.
D
I didn't.
C
Why are you raising your hand over there?
F
Gentlemen, you seem like very, very experienced adventurers.
C
Yeah.
F
We are trying to make our way to Frogmont, and we ran into a bit of trouble on our Owlcat bus and have been dumped here in the middle of the forest. If you would be so kind, we will stop touching your back. I don't mind.
C
Thank you. What is in there?
F
I apologize. I apologize for my friend's impoliteness.
C
Yeah, very impolite.
F
Yes, I'm very sorry about my cat.
E
He.
F
He's a little frisky.
C
Bad, bad kitty. And he points a meaty finger at me.
G
Yes.
F
Bad kitty.
C
Hey. He's hissing at me.
F
I was wondering, since you seem like very experienced adventurers, if you would be able to help us get to Lorelei Village, or at least close to where anyone thinks it might be. We've heard it's hidden, but we need to get there in order to get to Frogmont.
C
I have no idea what that is. Everyone give me insight checks.
F
2, 6, 16, 13.
C
You two, notice that he just lied like the other you guys kind of notice the guys behind him shift uneasily and.
G
Not very good adventurer if you don't know where Lore Village is.
C
Yeah, you don't know where it is either. I can tell that you the blank. Yeah, he's talking now. He's.
D
I don't know what you're talking about me, sir.
F
I believe you do know.
C
Well, even if I did, why would I tell you?
E
Well, you know, we've been nothing but kind since we got here, so you know what?
C
You're right. And then he takes a second and he goes, go to the coast and just walk along the coast.
E
Which way?
C
You'll find it.
G
That seems very.
C
To the left of the sun whenever it's going up.
F
Thank you very much, sir. This has been very, very helpful.
C
Ain't no problem.
F
I grab everyone's hands, I drag us out of his cavern.
C
He like kicks the bag and like a little like
E
turns around and she goes, you have an animal in there?
C
He's like. He's like, might as well. But he's like, it's not an animal.
D
You guys all heard that, right?
G
Distance perception check.
E
Sorry.
C
Yeah, sure, you can give me perception
E
check to see if it's an animal
C
or like an insight had. Whatever.
E
Yeah, it's 10.
C
10? You don't know? I. I'll say that Beans told you that he heard something moving in there.
G
Something whimpered. It moved alive. Yes. Animal. Aren't we all animals? That's what Beans likes to say. Esther. Esther.
F
So real beans.
G
Esther, look at me. Find it in your heart. We have to help the small, small thing in bag. What if it was me in bag? What if that big thing out there put me in the bag and then came and drank at the tavern?
D
Yeah, it's the right thing to do to help them.
F
Just before we leave, how much are you being paid to deliver that whatever is in that bag to wherever you are taking it?
C
Give me a persuasion check.
F
16.
C
You know about upwards of 10,000 gold.
G
Do we have that right?
E
That's a lot of gold.
G
What do you. No, let her go. Meow.
F
These earrings would get each of you 10,000 gold.
G
Good deal.
C
Give me electric to see how valuable they are.
F
They're two. There's a two.
C
Give me a deception. And like the DC is going to be higher because they are cheap.
F
It's 11.
C
Okay. The one of like this, like the scrawnier, the scrawniest of the barbarians, like runs up to you and like grabs the earrings and Is like, these weren't. Ain't worth 500 gold apiece. And then he drops them on the floor in front of you.
G
What are you, a praiser now? Thought you were adventurer.
C
I'm experienced.
G
What the hell does that.
C
Actually, he has a different one.
G
He goes, I'm experienced. Well, when you put it that way, I don't think so.
C
What are you, just a little cat and. Hey, he's talking.
G
Hey, yeah, you're talking.
C
Yeah, he's talking.
G
Yeah, you're hearing things.
C
Well, all right. You all are.
G
What's in the bag?
C
Have been asking a lot of questions, and we could just silence you right here.
E
Can I start a riot?
G
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Bean says no, all right?
C
He gets, like, really serious, and he bends down to look at the cat, Beans, who has been talking or meowing. All right, you leave right now, or I take her head off. And then he points at Sawyer, you
G
know, big, ugly looking motherfucker. Oh, Beans doesn't like when you threaten Beans friends. And Beans is gonna enter a rage, and his little eyes are gonna fit,
C
fill with, as you say. He goes to swing at Sawyer. And I. You can look at my thing. And the mic caught it. I rolled a NAT20 to take a swing, as you called him an ugly motherfucker to his face. So I'm gonna roll this damage real quick, and then we're gonna roll initiative. So y' all can roll initiative right now if you want.
E
Okay.
C
He rolled really low on his damage. He only got, like, three.
G
Okay, I know you could take it.
F
Okay, 16 nat 20.
C
Okay. All right. So he takes this swing at Sawyer and, like, nixed you on the shoulder.
D
You're gonna have to swing harder than that to take me down.
C
All right, I will.
G
Death is spirit.
C
Esta, you go first.
F
Immediate magic missile. Okay, 12 damage.
C
Nice.
D
What do your missiles look like?
C
One at each, dude.
F
So esta immediately, as soon as this guy swings, reaches her hands out, and three strikes of lightning hit each of these barbarians.
G
Cool.
C
Hell, yeah. Okay, that is going to be Beans.
G
Beans is going to turn to the tavern around him and say, aren't you all sick of these big bullies? Everyone, they have something in this bag that is whimpering and doesn't deserve to be in the bag, I'm sure. Aren't you all going to help us
C
give me a persuasion check.
G
Something I am not is persuasive, but it is an 18, so you probably have to do what I say.
C
18 you. I'm going to say, this is how this is going to work. To get a room of people to just fight a group of, like, big burly men. We're gonna say that this is like a two check thing. So you pass on this first check. People start standing up, and they look like they want to fight.
G
Great. Then I'll go. I will lead by example.
C
I'll say, that was an action. Can you. Do you have a bonus action?
G
No, because I don't think I get my ki points till I'm level two.
C
Okay, that is Beans turn Morgan.
G
I like to imagine that Bean says, I'll lead by example. And then it's just standing there.
C
Yeah.
D
He's got his claws out.
E
So as. As Bean says, I will lead by example. Morgan takes out two daggers and just throws them at two of the two guys closest.
C
Okay. Make attack rolls.
E
You can take a 16 or a 15.
C
I think you can only throw one. One.
E
Yeah, because I have two arms. I have one of my bones.
C
I have two arms. We'll double check that. But sure.
E
Bonus action to weapon fighting.
C
Okay, we'll count it. I'll look into the rules later. Okay. 15 into 16.
E
Yeah.
C
Okay, that's gonna hit. Do your damage.
E
Score. It's five and seven.
G
That is good. Good example.
C
You see one of the people who. In the bar, who you convinced was like, yeah.
G
You look like you have some frustration to get out.
C
He looks around. Like looks around and goes pointed himself.
D
Me?
G
Yes. Meow. I mean, sorry.
C
Very confusing little cat.
G
Yes.
C
Okay, that's going to be one of the barbarians turns. He's going to take a swing at Esther, who did the most damage to him. It's a four. He misses. That's his whole turn. One of the other barbarians is gonna go. He got a 19. And he's also gonna swing at ESTA. That is six points of damage.
G
Are you dead now?
E
No. Are you squishy?
C
And now Sawyer.
D
I watch Esta take that hit, and I'm gonna cast pep talk, which is just healing. Word. So you get one D4 plus. And I'm like, hey, don't let him knock you down like that. You get right back up. You get back on the field, and you hustle. Okay. And then I'm also going to reach my hand behind my back, pull out the sword handle that's been sitting kind of behind my shoulder. When I draw it, instead of having the appearance of a normal great sword, the blade of it is a baseball bat or an arcano ball bat. Sawyer's gonna swing it behind her shoulder just like a. A player at bat. And she's going to slam it into the guy that hit her.
C
Nice.
G
Wow.
C
Okay. Royal to hit.
D
That's going to be a 15 to hit.
C
That hits.
D
They just take half damage.
E
Rage.
C
Also.
G
Why would you ask?
C
Episode one.
G
Stop.
C
I got to walk these guys.
G
Hey, stop talking about things you should do.
D
12 points of damage. So she's swing the bat.
G
God damn sleep.
D
Slam it into his gut.
C
You totally knock him down. Almost like, not all the way, but like you crack his skull. And he is looking very bloodied.
G
Another good example.
C
Is that your turn?
F
Yes.
C
Okay.
D
Esther, did you heal?
G
Yeah.
E
Okay. Yeah.
G
That is. Wow, what crazy sword you have there.
D
Thanks. I made it myself.
F
I'm going to use the cantrip.
G
I can see Firebolt.
F
And I'm going to. I'm gonna take down the guy that Lily was hitting.
C
Yeah.
F
Was looking rough, so I'm just gonna hit him. I'm gonna hit him with Firebolt. I'll put one.24.
C
Yeah, that hits. Believe it or not.
F
Eight damage.
C
You blast that guy away. How do you do it?
F
I'm just sort of like reaching my hands out and this one hand just sort of becomes engulfed in electrical energy and I release it at this guy's face.
C
Hell yeah. You get the sense that these guys were gonna kill y'. All. Do you want to kill this guy?
G
Yeah.
C
Okay, how do you, like, how does he die?
F
He dies barking and convulsing electrical energy. Flailing on the floor. Flailing on the floor.
C
Okay.
F
It's like you've been tased, you know, to death.
C
Okay. That. With that horrifying death, Beans is now your turn.
F
Am I allowed to also, like, roll intimidation with that?
C
Yeah, yeah, I'll say. You okay?
F
Because I wanted.
C
Like, that's kind of like their leader that just died.
F
Yeah. I mean, like, it was horrifying.
C
Yeah. I want it, like, give me by
F
doing it, I want to intimidate the other two guys.
C
Give me intimidation with advantage. Okay. 18. 18. Okay, you guys. You see these two guys piss themselves and they. They're like, well, we gotta get out of here. Voice for them. And then they start running back and then one of them reaches for the bag and then he just. He just like, looks at you guys and, like draws it. He looks at all of you. What are you gonna say? Beans.
E
Beans.
G
Going to look at them and be like, if you want to make it out of here alive and not frilly fried like your little friend over there, I'd put back down and then I'd get out of here.
C
The guy drops the bag and then they run out of the tavern.
G
Beans gives a little wave.
D
I say, wow, the first day of school has been shocking, to say the least.
C
You guys is that joke.
D
You could say that.
C
You guys have defeated these barbarians and the whole tavern is like, hooray.
G
Okay, nobody else got their chance to jump in. But next time, everyone.
D
We couldn't have done it without the fans.
G
We love you guys.
E
Or guns, like spinning in a circle with her hands raised above her hair, like, so excited.
C
The Dragonborn brings y' all over some food. And there's just a bag on the floor now.
D
Oh, yeah, we should probably help out the lump in there.
G
Yes. Beans opens bag.
C
Okay, you. After you take your little scimitar or a claw, and you shink, open the bag.
G
Hello, Lump.
C
And out of this bag, you see this small fish, like, mixed with a shark. Little boy. He's got this kind of blue on the outside and, like, his underbelly. And underneath his arms is white. And he's like, oh, hello. And with that, we will end the first episode.
D
That was good.
F
Second little guy of the day collected.
D
We are collecting these shits like Pokemon. Little guy.
C
Another little guy.
D
He said, what if that had been me in that bag?
C
Means that could have been you.
G
No, one day I will be in bag. We all know.
C
So, yeah, you'll have this little fish guy with y' all at least. And you guys gotta figure out what to do with him.
G
Better than I could have imagined.
C
Thank you for listening to Gals and Goblins. Rate the podcast on whatever it is. Spotify, Apple, Music. I don't know what we're gonna put this.
G
I'm rating this a 3 out of 10 if you're out.
C
Okay. If you do that, then I'm not gonna read your review. Because if you give us a five stars, then I'm going to read the review at the end of the podcast.
G
Oh, and then I'm going to read it, too, but in Beans's voice.
C
Okay. Yeah, you can read it in Beans voice and then follow us on our
G
Discord or, like, join our Discord and Tik Tok.
C
Yeah, look at the description. Okay. With that.
D
Foreign.
B
To listen to the next exciting episode, you can click on the link in the description or search for Gals and Goblins wherever you get your podcasts. Or you can find more information@rustedquill.com thanks for listening.
A
Hi, Alex here, founder and CEO of Rusty Quill Ltd. In case you haven't heard, there is now a Magnus Archives novel. The Library of Jurgen Leitner is Set in the world of the Magnus archives and written by Nebula award winning author Premier Mohammed with our very own Jonathan Sims, the story follows Hugh, a university dropout desperate to find somewhere to belong and his new job at an esoteric library. The books he must investigate for the enigmatic Jurgen Leitner are not normal because the library is not a vault sealed and silent, but a hive, alive, buzzing and ready to sting. The Library of Jurgen Leitner Releases October 27, 2026 but you can pre order it right now in the US and UK from your local bookshop or by using the link in the episode description. If you live outside of the UK or us, you may be able to make an international order for this first publication, but it depends on individual retailers, shipping policies.
Podcast: The Magnus Archives (Rusty Quill Network Feed Drop)
Date: May 21, 2026
Featured Podcast: Gals & Goblins – Actual Play TTRPG
Episode: Ep.1 – All Aboard the Owl Cat Bus
This special episode is a feed drop from Gals & Goblins, a Rusty Quill Network actual play podcast that loosely follows Dungeons & Dragons, prioritizing fun and mayhem ("the rule of cool"). The premiere episode, “All Aboard the Owlcat Bus,” introduces four quirky new adventurers on their chaotic first journey to Frogmont Adventuring Academy in the magical realm of Eldrivael. Listeners meet the unlikely heroes as they board the whimsical Owlcat Bus, encounter danger, and form the beginnings of a tight-knit party through fast-paced action and riotous roleplaying.
“Sawyer is kind of going over what she’s going to write in her journal tonight…” (D, 04:22)
[06:08] Sawyer: “Hey, are you going to Frogmont too? I’m waiting for them to pick me up.”
[09:38] Esta: “I can either choose the bus stop that’s going to take me to Weaselby… or Frogmont, where I’d, you know, stand out.”
[10:58] Sawyer: “I bet you’re so excited. And don’t let my letterman jacket freak you out. I’m sure they’ll have a uniform for you. This is actually my mom’s, it’s a hand-me-down.”
[12:54] Morgan: “I go and I hold my hand out to act as a landing for this little guy.”
[16:53] Narration: “Beans is a small little Tabaxi boy… imagine a little kitty who drank too much milk.”
[17:57] Sawyer: “Gilba, there’s someone in danger!”
[18:32] Beans: “Beans is running as fast as little legs can carry him… Yes, yes, I’ll take him!”
[23:30] Gilbo: “We’re gonna land over there at that little building… and then Sarah [the Owlcat Bus] and I will distract this guy. How’s that sound?”
[25:31] Narration: “Beans is just running… not quite towards the coast, not quite towards the forest. It’s a little—okay, in between the two.”
[29:08] Sawyer: “You guys seem awfully protective of that bag.”
[39:14] Beans: “What are you, a praiser now? Thought you were adventurer.”
[44:06] Sawyer (healing Esta and drawing a magical arcana bat): “Hey, don’t let him knock you down like that. You get right back up! …just like a player at bat.”
[48:28] Beans: “Hello, Lump.”
[48:54] Narration: “…You see this small fish, like, mixed with a shark. Little boy …and with that, we will end the first episode.”
[02:01] Jared (GM): “I am your gobble master … and with me are the gals…”
[48:01] Morgan: [spinning excitedly with hands above her head] [47:44] Sawyer: “The first day of school has been shocking, to say the least.”
[06:08] Sawyer shouts: “Hey, are you going to Frogmont too?” [16:53] Beans: “Imagine a little kitty that drank too much milk… That’s exactly what Beans looks like.” [47:19] Beans: “If you want to make it out of here alive and not frilly fried like your little friend over there, I’d put [the bag] down…” [44:49] Sawyer: “She’s gonna swing it behind her shoulder, just like a player at bat, and slam it into the guy that hit her.”
[39:37] Jared (GM): “What are you, just a little cat … Hey, he’s talking.” [45:02] Jared (GM), exasperated: "I gotta walk these guys!” (in response to the escalating episode one chaos)
Throughout the episode, the chemistry is infectious, full of witty banter, silly voices, and genuine warmth. The players embrace chaos, friendship, and bold choices—prioritizing story and laughter over rigid adherence to rules.
This is a character-driven, high-energy, fantastical school road trip adventure—perfect for fans of quirky humor, magical creatures, and found-family TTRPG stories.
End of Summary.