
This episode is a MUST listen. Mel calls it “the single best conversation” she has ever recorded. If you’ve ever felt behind, stuck, or doubting yourself, you need to hit play. This is the most motivational, eye-opening episode that you will ever hear, and it will give you the roadmap to become the person you’ve always wanted to be. Today, Mel is joined by Emma Grede. Emma is one of the most successful self-made businesswomen in the world and the force behind three billion-dollar brands: SKIMS, Good American, and Safely. But this is not a conversation about business. It’s about creating an extraordinary life, even if you’re starting from nothing. Emma was raised in East London by a single mom. She’s dyslexic and did poorly in school. She dropped out of college in her first year because she couldn’t afford tuition. But that was just the start of her story. She proves that anything is possible when you refuse to quit. Today, she has built 3 billion-dollar companies, b...
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Mel Robbins
Hey, it's your friend Mel. And welcome to the Mel Robbins Podcast. I'm just going to start the show by saying this is one of the single best episodes we have ever recorded. You are in for something extraordinary. This is not only one of my favorite conversations that I've ever had, but there is no question your life will never be the same again once you listen to it. Today I am joined by one of the most successful self made women in the world in business today. Emma greed is the CEO and co founder of $3 billion brands, Good American Skims and Safely. But this is not a business conversation. This is a conversation about getting everything that you want out of life from a woman who fought her way to the top. And this is hands down one of the most inspiring, motivating, energizing conversations that I have ever had in my entire life. I cannot wait for you to experience this, and I don't say that lightly. Today you're getting the blueprint on how to live an extraordinary life. And I'm going to say right up front that even if you feel like you are starting with nothing, this conversation is going to make you realize you can still create something extraordinary. Now, Emma grew up in East London to a single mother. She struggled through school. At the age of 17, she dropped out of college because she couldn't pay for it. This is a story of how she went from there to becoming the co founder of $3 billion companies. You are going to be blown away by her magnetism, her relatability, her passion and the truth bombs she is about to drop over and over and over again. She has hopped on a plane and flown across the country to be here for you, to tell you step by step exactly how to dream bigger, how to create the future you want, and how to start where you are and build something that makes you proud. Emma's remarkable story is proof that there is no limit to what you can create. And she is going to show you exactly what it takes to bet on yourself. Especially when the people around you are doubting you. What you're about to learn is going to help you turn your dreams into reality. And I just can't wait for you to hear this. Hey, it's your friend Mel. And welcome to the Mel Robbins Podcast. It is always an honor to be together and to spend time with you. But today in particular, I am so excited that you're here because here's what I know. You're the kind of person who who aspires to something bigger. You wanna create a life that makes you proud? Oh my God. Are you in the right place? You're about to experience one of the most extraordinary conversations I've ever had in my entire life. And if you're a new listener or you're here because somebody shared this with you, first of all, this episode's a gift. So really happy somebody shared this with you. I also wanna personally welcome you to the Mel Robbins Podcast family because you picked an extraordinary place to start by listening to this. This is one of my favorite episodes that I have ever taped, period. Today I am joined by one of the most successful self made women in business today, Emma Green. Emma was just named one of America's richest self made women by Forbes. She is the CEO and co founder of $3 billion Brands Good American, which was the first fully inclusive fashion brand, SKIMS, the $4 billion global shapewear brand and Safely, a line of high quality plant based cleaning products. She's also a venture investor, a judge on Shark Tank, a mother of four, the chair of the 15% pledge, which is a nonprofit that encourages retailers to pledge at least 15% of their shelf space to black owned businesses. And now she is unpacking and sharing all of her incredible advice and lessons about business and career and goals on her new podcast, Aspire with Emma Reed. I am so extraordinarily excited to welcome her to the Mel Robbins Podcast and to be able to share this conversation with you. So please help me welcome Emma Greed to the Mel Robbins Podcast. Welcome to the Mel Robbins Podcast.
Emma Grede
Thank you so much for having me. I am so happy to be here.
Mel Robbins
I am so excited to have you here. I can't wait to learn from you and I know the person that is here with us and so I'd love to start by having you just share with the person who's here what could they experience that could be different about their life or their future if they take everything that you're about to teach us and share with us today to heart.
Emma Grede
I honestly think about my life and more specifically my career as a bit of a blueprint for what happens when you a, take responsibility for yourself and when you really manage your thoughts carefully. And I think if there's anything that I've learned, it's that the combination of those two things will take you really, really far in life.
Mel Robbins
So taking responsibility for yourself and your life.
Emma Grede
Yeah. And choosing your thoughts really carefully.
Mel Robbins
Choosing your thoughts really carefully because it's a choice. And when you do that, what happens?
Emma Grede
You know, when you do that, somehow your life starts to align and it's really interesting because it's a practice, like I feel like I'm in practice to be the woman that I wanna be constantly. And so I have to really think about those things. And so when you bring those two things together, it allows you to be really, really purposeful and the outcome starts to just manifest, like it starts to actually happen.
Mel Robbins
So a lot of people know that you're a judge on Shark Tank. You are the co founder of several billion dollar companies. Congratulations on making the Forbes 100 Self Made Women list.
Emma Grede
Thank you.
Mel Robbins
But most people don't know where this all began. And so I want to go back to the beginning, to East London and talk about what life looked like when you were little.
Emma Grede
Well, you know, I was brought up in East London, which is a bit like, you know, if you were born in Harlem or Crenshaw or something like that, like maybe, you know, the rough side of the tracks, if you wanna see it like that. I'm the oldest of four girls raised by a wonderful, wonderful single mom. And you know, we, I guess life was a little bit tough. You know, my mom did the best that she could with the little that she had. And you know, I always think about our relationship dynamics as like, you know, she was the dad, I was the mom, and we had three kids together. You know, I was a very parentified child, if you like to say it that way. And I have a very, very close relationship with my three sisters as a result of that. Cause I was really part of raising them and, you know, looking after them. I used to get up in the morning and iron three school shirts and make three pack lunches and send them off to school. And sometimes, you know, I wouldn't go to school myself, I'd be exhausted by that point. You know, I was really raised by a family like my mom's family, her sisters, her mom were huge, huge parts of our life.
Mel Robbins
It checks out, honestly, because you are so driven and you are the kind of person that I feel like you see something, you just do it. How do you think your childhood and that experience of taking care of your little sisters has impacted and shaped who.
Emma Grede
You are today, you know, in so many ways, and good and bad, if I'm honest. You know, I learned at a very young age to take a lot of responsibility for myself. But I was always on very high alert. Right where I lived wasn't particularly safe. And so you had to think a few steps ahead constantly. But it also gave me this idea that I needed to get far away from where I was. I was very Aware that my circumstances would be limited if I stayed where I was from. And so I had this idea that I would need to work really, really hard to get out of this place. But I knew I would in a way. I just felt like I don't know what I'm going to do. I don't know how this is going to work, but I've got to get out of here.
Mel Robbins
I think a lot of people feel like that.
Emma Grede
Oh, yeah, totally.
Mel Robbins
And so if the person that's listening or watching right now feels that way, but they are not sure that they're going to get out, what would you say to them? Because you have already said two things. You gotta take responsibility for yourself, for your life, for where you're going, and you gotta choose your thoughts. So if you have this sense, like, there's more for me, I gotta get out of here, I want to have something different. But then your thoughts are like, ah, it worked for Emma, but I'm not that kind of person. What would you say?
Emma Grede
Well, you know, the other thing is, Mel, so many people that come from a place like where I come from, there's this sense that you'll be abandoning where you come from that actually it's the wrong thought to have. You're like, this is who I am. This is where I come from. This is part of me. And what I would say to that person is, you don't have to leave where you come from. In your heart, I'm still the girl I always was. I'm the girl from Plasto. I will always be that girl. I just left that place. And so you don't have to give up who you are and what made you you. If you leave that physical space, you can still be and have that heart of gold and that sense of scrappiness and whatever made you great. And I think that that is really, really important because that's what troubled me so much. That I would leave the people that made me me, that I would leave those family members and those friends that were so pivotal to me as I grew up. The truth is that those people are with me every single day. Like, that's just who I am. And I would say that, you know, anything is possible if you really put your mind to it. But you are not going to manifest your way out of anything. You have to take those thoughts and everything that you want and you've got to couple it with something. And for me, that has been hard work. There is no secret. The secret is I had the vision and I put it Together with some really, really hard work. And that's what you have to do.
Mel Robbins
I love you so much. I really do. Because there's just a grit to you and there's grit plus an amazingly huge heart. And so what a beautiful thing to say that you can change where you are, but that doesn't change who you are.
Emma Grede
Exactly. Love that.
Mel Robbins
Clearly. You know, you also said something earlier about how you are constantly asking yourself and reminding yourself about the woman you want to be. What kind of woman do you want to be like, when you think about it?
Emma Grede
Well, you know, I think that for me what's been really important and actually you get to a place where you're successful and there's this sense of responsibility in me. Right. And again, I think it comes from where I come from that I think if you are still that person inside. Because I still feel like 15 year old Emma who was like hanging around on the streets just making things up in her head and dreaming of what could happen. I want to impact those people. I want to get everything that I've learned and everything that I have and figure out how could there be a million more Emmas? Like that's what consumes me now. That's what I think about every single day.
Mel Robbins
That's what we're gonna do with this conversation. Because there is so much to learn from your story. Cause you took a very unconventional path to success.
Emma Grede
You could say that, Mel.
Mel Robbins
Yeah. So were you good at school?
Emma Grede
I was terrible at school. I was so bad at school. And you know, the interesting thing is I'm severely dyslexic, so. And I didn't find out that I was dyslexic until I was in my early 20s. And so school for me was just always a struggle. It wasn't that I was particularly like naughty or disobedient. It just was so hard. And for me at that point in my life, I was like, if it's difficult, I'm just going to push it away, I'm just going to react to it. And if I'm really honest, I had some anger issues that I had to work through. Because where I come from, if something wasn't working, if something was hitting you in a place of uncomfortableness and you were just, you were gonna smack it out of the way, you know, and that's what I learned. I learned over and over again to react with anger. And so I really had to train that piece of me out. And I've done a lot of work and I've been in therapy since I was 19 years old, figuring those things out.
Mel Robbins
What were you angry about?
Emma Grede
I think that I grew up in a place where blame was just part of the culture. Like, nothing was ever our fault. It was always about seeing somebody else over there. This neighbor, the government, nothing. You were never. I was never taught to, like, take responsibility and figure something out. And I feel like they're the cornerstones of my personality now. It's like, I tell my kids, you know, every. I'm like, figure it out. Like, just figure it out. And taking responsibility is something that I just. It's ingrained in me now. But it wasn't then, and I was angry that there was seemingly no easy path for me. I thought it should have been easier. I thought that because I was working so hard, it should have happened faster. And you have to imagine, you know, I'm 42 now. I've done a job that I love for five years, not longer. For five years. I've spent my entire career doing things that have been okay and I've enjoyed ish. But I never had, like, the dream of the dream job. I've just kept going and going and going to get closer to the thing that it is that I love. And I think that that is maybe not something that we talk about enough in, you know, in media and society right now. You are on a journey. Like, it doesn't just happen, this idea of overnight success that we've built, especially around entrepreneurialism and around starting a business. Like, it's a lovely story, but it's not a career path, and it's not really true for. And so I thought I was owed something. And it wasn't till I kind of got to about 19, I was like, nobody owes you nothing, that things started to fall into place for me.
Mel Robbins
I think I just heard the person who's watching and listening, share, share, share. Because we can spot that attitude. And other people, like, I would imagine, because I have two people in my mind right now that I'm like, that's the issue. They're sitting around pissed off, blaming the world when they are fully capable of picking themselves up exactly where they are and figuring it out. What would you say to somebody who is stuck in that Blame does think that they are owed something? Because it's so easy to kind of get stuck in that place yourself, where you convince yourself that it's not gonna be easy, or you convince yourself that you are owed something, and then the anger does consume you.
Emma Grede
And let's be honest, like, some people are dealt an unfair hand sometimes you've got stuff to be angry about. Sometimes it's not something that you made up in your head. It's your reality. You know, I'm a woman, I'm black, I grew up poor. I think I had something to be a little bit mad about. Right. Having said that, it wasn't serving me. And I think at the end of this, we've got to say, is this thing that I'm holding onto, is it optimal? Is it working for me? And if it ain't, you gotta let it go. And that's just that, because what is useful to us is the idea that we're gonna, like, have this baggage, but we're gonna leave it, and we're gonna use what is in us to propel ourselves forward. If what you've got is keeping you stuck, leave it. Like, walk away.
Mel Robbins
How the hell do you do that?
Emma Grede
I think the real way that you do it is by having some acceptance of it and saying, you know what? This is what it is, and I accept that, and that's okay. And I'm still going to move forward. I'm still not gonna allow this to hold me back. That is not my story. It's just not what I want.
Mel Robbins
And did you know what you wanted?
Emma Grede
Yeah.
Mel Robbins
What did you want?
Emma Grede
You know, I just wanted to. I wanted to escape my situation. You know, I've been obsessed with fashion since before I can even remember. But for me, it was a means of a. It was like, you know, I grew up in London. It was all about the supermodels, Naomi Campbell and Kate Moss and all the core designers. And I used that and, you know, that industry, those people looking in the magazines as a means of escapism. There was something to dream for, something to, you know, look forward to, something to aspire to. I wanted to get out of where I was so bad, Mel. Like, I can't even tell you. I wanted to live a different life and work in something that was enjoyable because, again, where I grew up, everyone did a job to pay their bills. Yeah, I didn't know anyone who had a fulfilling career. You know, it just wasn't even part of the vernacular then. So I. For me, it's like I just wanted to get closer to something that I loved.
Mel Robbins
That is such a universal experience. And it's really important to recognize that if you're feeling that way, to lean into the desire. You know, you don't have to love fashion, you don't have to wanna do a podcast, but there's something about recognizing that you want more, that is where this all begins.
Emma Grede
Oh, yeah.
Mel Robbins
Because until you do, you can't take responsibility for what that more might be.
Emma Grede
It's so true. It's. You know, again, I'm a mom of four now, and the only thing I care about is that my kids care about something. You've got to have something that you feel strongly about. And for me, it is, was, and will ever be. Always be. Fashion. That's just what I loved. But it's always, we have to remember that. We have to have something to hope for. Like, that can be anything. But you gotta have something in your sight that you are striving for. And I think that that's really important just as a basic human emotion. You gotta have a thing, a goal, an expectation, but something that drives you. And if you cannot figure out what that is, if you don't know what you should pursue, you should pursue yourself. You should figure out, how do I make myself better? How do I eat better? How do I exercise better? How do I get better habits? How do I get better? And that thing will figure itself out.
Mel Robbins
Why is that important?
Emma Grede
It's the key of life. Because we're all on a journey. And if that journey is not to leave the world better than you found it, for you to be better than you were when you started, then what are we all doing, right? We're in a lifelong journey. You know, I'm obsessed with quotes, and one of my favorite ones is, the more you learn, the more you earn. It's a Warren Buffett quote, and I love Warren. I'm obsessed, but I think about that all the time. And I am a person that has. And again, despite my dyslexia, I'm gobbling up information all the time. But it is in an effort to make myself better, to grow myself, to expand the way that I think. And so I say to people all the time, like, that is what you should do. You should pursue the highest version of yourself that you can possibly be. And within that, you will figure it all out.
Mel Robbins
I'm in.
Emma Grede
Well, you definitely are in, Mel. That's what you're doing every day.
Mel Robbins
Well, what's interesting, Emma, is you're so on fire that I keep forgetting that I should ask you a question. Because I'm like, is there more coming? Because. Keep going, Emma.
Emma Grede
I'm like, I'm on the Mel Robbing show. Oh, my God.
Mel Robbins
Well, you know, one of the things that I was curious about, because I do agree with you, that if you can, you have to have something. And the other thing I wanted to say about it is I have no interest in fashion. And I'm saying that because what you're interested in personally doesn't have to make sense to somebody else. No, because it's not for somebody else. No, it's for you. And if you don't have that thing that gets you out of bed, whether it's a distraction or an interest or a passion or a person, then make yourself the reason why. What is the first step of that journey to pursuing yourself.
Emma Grede
So it's really interesting because I think there's a couple of things that you can do. So let's just put health and wellness to the side for one second. It's a huge part of it. But let's talk about what it means to be excellent, right? To be excellent. I really understand the power of, like, how you do anything is how you do everything. And this idea of excellence, of taking it seriously, how you wake up in the morning, of taking it seriously, how you prepare your breakfast, taking it seriously, how you show up in work, how you see, see people like, do you go morning? Or do you go, morning? How are you? And do you listen and respond back? All of these things matter. They matter to who you are, they matter to how you're seen, and they matter to how you're viewed. When I, you know, made sandwiches in a deli, I made the best sandwich. When I worked in the cupboard in a PR agency, packing clothes, I would fold those clothes beautifully. My boxes, my tissue was amazing, my sticker was in the middle. I would do it with excellence, Every little thing. Because that is what makes people gravitate towards you. When you take everything that you do seriously and you take an element of pride in anything, it draws people in. And, you know, you have to work a lot of dog jobs before you get the thing. Life is very, very long and it goes in chapters. And so what I say to people is, be excellent at where you're at, at whatever you're doing, because that has some kind of invisible magnetic pull.
Mel Robbins
Terry Crews tells this incredible story about being dead broke after getting out of the NFL, and he's moved his wife and four kids to la, and he thinks he's going to be an illustrator. And then all of a sudden, the digital illustration stuff is happening and he is at the end of his rope, depressed, can't get work, and he gets a job sweeping, literally a custodian on a movie lot. And he kept himself going by saying, how would I sweep this floor if somebody was paying me a million dollars to do it? And to me, what you're saying is, if you simply don't know where to start, you just gave the most brilliant advice on the planet. What would it look like to wake up tomorrow morning and start the day with excellence? What would it look like to wake up tomorrow morning? And how would you do it if somebody was paying you a million dollars to just get out of bed and make your bed? What would your morning look like? What happens internally? Because there is the thing that people are drawn to, because it is true.
Emma Grede
Because the vibration within you literally changes. Like, you vibrate a different energy. If you wake up with a smile on your face and you say, maybe if somebody's in the bed with you, good morning, darling. I made you a cup of tea. Like, what does that say? That says, I value you, the morning is good. And here we are together. And I just acknowledged you. Like, who doesn't want to wake up like that? And if nobody's next to you and you stretch your arms like this, and you put nice pajamas on because you care about yourself and. And you make your bed and you walk away and you're like, look at that bed. That is like, that's the dream. And that's what I say to my kids. I remake their beds, by the way. But that's not the point. You know, it's like how you do anything is how you do everything. And that is the key. You've got to start. You've got to sweat the small stuff, and you have to start somewhere. And when you have nothing and I have been there, that works because that starts to set the tone. And people notice. They really, really notice.
Mel Robbins
I want to go back in time.
Emma Grede
What is this, Mel?
Mel Robbins
It's a photo of you when you were 17 years old.
Emma Grede
Oh, look. And these two are still. My darling. I'm literally having dinner with these two in London next week. Selah and Chanel.
Mel Robbins
Well, I'm going to give you that photo as your present for being here on the podcast. You're 17 years old. You had just left.
Emma Grede
Yeah, I.
Mel Robbins
Tell us about that moment and what was happening in your life.
Emma Grede
Well, you know, I have to say that was a crushing time for me because I left home when I was 16. The circumstances at my house had just become untenable. And I left home. And home was an hour and a half away from where I lived. So I get this, like, terrible, you know, high rise apartment. I had no fridge, no oven. We kept our milk on the balcony. Cause in London it's that cold that you could kind of keep Milk fresh for two days if you left it on the balcony. And I enrolled at the London College of Fashion. So this for you guys is what you would call Senior High. I'm 16, dropped out at 17. And you can imagine I fought so hard to get into that college. And so to drop out wasn't like, I can't be bothered. It was that I couldn't continue. I couldn't make ends meet. I couldn't figure out the train fare, I couldn't figure out how I would eat, how, you know, the couple of days a week that I had to work. Because you're in college four days. And then I was working every day. I just couldn't make it work. The math wasn't mapping, as we would say now. And so it was a bit of disappointment. But what was interesting is that actually, that's when my life started to fall into place. Because for me, I was like, okay, how do I keep learning? How do I keep close to the dream? And in those days, you could go around and find work placements. And so I thought to myself, I'll.
Mel Robbins
Just work for free.
Emma Grede
I'll get as close as I can to the career that I think I want. And I went from, you know, PR agency to designer showroom, like from one terrible bottom of the barrel job to another. And, you know, Mel, I would do everything I could to get these work placements. Like I was sending, you know, because again, in those days there wasn't email, so it was just sending, sending letters out. And nobody was responding to my letters. And so I started hand delivering letters. Cause I was like, maybe they're just not getting them. It was kind of ridiculous. And every now and again there would be a break.
Mel Robbins
Kind of brilliant, actually.
Emma Grede
I mean, you know, for me it was just tenacity. And I couldn't even imagine that it was because of me. You know, I never took it personally. I didn't think I'm not good enough. I didn't think, you know, I'm not worthy. I thought they didn't get the letter because I'm so good and I have so much to offer and I'm gonna work so hard. They just must not know yet. And so I just kept going and going and going and going until somebody said, yes, okay, like, come in. You can work here for free for a couple of weeks.
Mel Robbins
And for somebody who's listening, who's like, I need that. I need that tenacity. Because I send an email and then I sit back and then I think something's wrong with me.
Emma Grede
It's never about you, Mel. It's never ever about you. And this is the big thing that I want specifically women to understand. We have become as a group obsessed with this idea of perfection. That it always has to be perfect, that it always has to be as it is in the movies. And that is just not. It's not my experience. My whole journey has not been linear. It has been, you know, one great thing happened and then like, nothing. Nothing. Literally nothing. In fact, sometimes it just went down. But you cannot take it personally because it's never about you. You can fail. And it's just the thing. That thing didn't work out. It is not that you don't work. It is not that you have something wrong with you. So for me, I would just like dust myself off. I'll be like, that wasn't my moment. That wasn't for me. It's not my time. And just keep going.
Mel Robbins
Well, I would also imagine that if you're also feeling the pressure of buying food and paying rent, you also don't have a choice. Like, there's a certain level of stress that you feel if you cannot make the ends meet or you barely do because you can't stop.
Emma Grede
You have no choice.
Mel Robbins
You have no choice.
Emma Grede
You have no choice.
Mel Robbins
And so one thing I wanted to ask you because what you said about excellence was mind blowing and 1000% accurate. How do you pursue excellence versus the trap of being perfect? What's the difference between excellence and that perfectionism trap that women get stuck in?
Emma Grede
That is such a beautiful question. I think that you have to learn. And this is going to sound, and I don't want it to sound self limiting. We all have a different measuring stick, right?
Mel Robbins
Yeah.
Emma Grede
What is perfect to you is not perfect to me. And I think that we have to be realistic with ourselves. And so what I've done in my life is really think about myself. I'm not thinking, I'm not looking in the media. I'm not on social. I'm not in a magazine trying to live up to that version. I'm like, what is my version of excellence based on where I come from and who I am? What's good enough for me? Because I'm not comparing myself to anyone else. You know, you and I both love that same quote, right? It's like it's you against you.
Mel Robbins
Yes.
Emma Grede
That's it. And that's where you have to be very, very honest and very self reflective. Because if you are going to be in the comparison game, you. You will never be satisfied. You Will never be happy.
Mel Robbins
Okay, I think I just got it. I wanna extract what you just said and give it back to you and see if I heard you correctly. Cause I think I just got the difference. You ready? So perfectionism is when you are focused on the outside. Perfectionism is when you are measuring what other people are going to think about what you just did. Excellence is on the inside. Because excellence is about the effort in and whether or not the effort that you put in is good enough for you. That right there, Mel, that's really a great distinction. I've never thought about it that way because I've always thought about, like, perfectionism. Because so many women in particular struggle with it as something that you're doing internally.
Emma Grede
No, it's coming at you from every angle all the time. And you have to be very, very careful as a woman that that doesn't start to define you. That that doesn't seep into you. Right. Because the minute that goes inside you, you're in trouble. And, you know, I have this great friend, Diane von Furstenberg. She's the most insane and incredible woman ever. But she talks about this idea of the most important relationship you'll ever have is the relationship you have with yourself. And so you gotta be real careful that your biggest enemy isn't living between your two ears. Right. It's like this conversation that goes on all day that's relentless, has to be kind, it has to be compassionate. It has to be empathetic. These are all things that we give away to other people. If you're a good person all the time, but it starts with you, you have to give that stuff to yourself first and foremost. And when you start to do that, and when you start a daily practice that says, I am gonna behave like this to myself when I speak to myself, this is how I'm gonna be, that rewires you.
Mel Robbins
Well, even talking to yourself that way is in itself its own form of excellence. Yes, Right. Because you operate that way in the world, that level of excellence with other people. And so it's a beautiful way to think about talking to yourself in a kind and cheering and empathetic way is a form of exc. With yourself. I love that. What would you say to somebody that is kind of at the beginning of the journey in their career right now, trying to figure it out?
Emma Grede
You know, Mel, honestly, what I would say is that everything you want is on the other side of what you're working towards. You just gotta be working. It's all there. Everything you want is there. It's just gotta find you working, and that's it. You can't think your way into what you want. You can't wish it, you can't hope for it. You gotta do. And that's where this perfectionist trap is poisonous for us. Because if you think that you have to do it perfectly or it has to come in some, you know, spectacular way, or this thing that you want to do has to be really big, it doesn't. It's like, just start. Just do something. And know that if you are doing, if you have forward momentum, if you are moving in the correct direction of travel, you will get there, but you have to be moving.
Mel Robbins
And what about if you don't know if you're in the right direction? Like, I'm, I'm.
Emma Grede
Then you just go. Because I never knew. I never knew. And the fact is, sometimes I wasn't going in the right direction, but at least I was going somewhere.
Mel Robbins
Because what.
Emma Grede
What happens is you pick up all this information along the way if you're smart. And when you make mistakes again, it comes back to that idea of, like, how am I speaking to myself? Because if you're. If you treat yourself like a good friend, imagine that your friend messes up, right? She messes up. You don't go, you absolute silly cow. You go, darling, let's talk about this. What happened? I love you. Anyway, let's go through it. Where were the mistakes? How are we going to do things differently next time? Time? That's what you have to do for yourself. So know that that is inevitable. And, you know, I've kind of trained myself around this rule of thirds that I have in my head, and that has really, really, really helped me to.
Mel Robbins
The rule of thirds.
Emma Grede
So the rule of thirds is something that. I remember hearing this when I was a bit younger, and it's like, I almost live by it. So if you are doing something difficult, if you're chasing a dream, if you are on the road to whatever it is, you are going to be happy about a third of the time. And the other third of the time, you are going to be like, you know, life is kind of all right. And the final third of the time, you're going to feel terrible.
Mel Robbins
Now, it sounds like a marriage you're going to.
Emma Grede
Basically, it can be applied to marriage, too. But, you know, the point is that we shouldn't feel good all the time, right? It's just part of how we're conditioned right now to imagine that, like, life is this, like, you know, Instagram reel of wonderfulness and that ain't the truth. So if you can learn to accept. Do you know what? On those really bad days when you feel really crappy, you're like, that's okay. In fact, I'm exactly where I need to be. Because I'm going to have those days, and I'm going to have some of the middling days, and then I'm going to have these great days. And so if you go off track, that's all right. Because you have to know that you can come back. And when you're on fire, you also better be real humble. Cause you're gonna know that those stinky times are coming, too. So it's a really lovely way to keep yourself in balance. And I think about it probably daily. A third and a third and a third.
Mel Robbins
The rule of thirds. I love it. Now I'm gonna think about it daily. And I know that the person that is listening is gonna think about it daily and share that rule of third with the people that they care about. Because it is true that when you're going through the crappy part, you think this is going to be that way forever.
Emma Grede
Yes.
Mel Robbins
And, yeah, we all hear, oh, it's temporary. But I love a rule.
Emma Grede
I love a rule. I love a rule. I love a rule.
Mel Robbins
And so I love being able to say to myself, even though it's been a crappy decade, this is just a third of a third. Like, it's. It's just one third of what I'm going to experience.
Emma Grede
I love that you say a decade. Because people tend to overestimate what they can do in a year and underestimate what can actually happen in a decade. I have been in America for eight years this July 4th, and I'm a different Emma. Right. Like, that eight years didn't just happen in eight years. It happened the 30 years before, the 40 years almost before. Right. So we have to think about, like, why, what it actually takes, and time. And I feel like, as a young person, you can be in such a rush. It's like, don't be in a rush. Life is long. Life happens in chapters. And so as a young person, all you need to say to yourself is, I am willing to work, and I'm willing to accept the direction of travel. And it will be going forward some of the time, and it will be standing on a spot some of the time, and it will be going backwards some of the other time, and all of it is fine.
Mel Robbins
Emma. Oh, my God. I don't want to take a break. I could listen to you nonstop. We haven't even gotten into the backstory on these billion dollar companies you're the co founder of. So let's take a pause. Let's give our sponsors a chance to share a few words. And I want you to share this with everybody that you know, particularly people in their 20s and their 30s. Anybody in your life that has always had a big dream but keeps standing in their own way, let Emma inspire them. This is one of these conversations I know I'm going to be listening to on repeat. So it is a gift to anyone that you share it with. And don't you dare go anywhere. Emma and I will be waiting for you after the short break. So stay with me. Welcome back, it's your friend Mel. And today you and I are getting inspiration, motivation and the step by step blueprint to creating a life that you are proud of from none other than Emma. Greed. So Emma, could you speak to the pressure that people feel when they're young to just jam it all in? Like one of the things that I see from especially people in their 20s and early 30s is that I gotta do it all. I gotta travel, I gotta do this, I gotta find the person, I gotta figure out my dream career. And I love that you're saying when you are young, just slow down.
Emma Grede
Well, let me tell you what I really believe works. Tell me we are in too much of a rush. Having said that, your 20s is the time to try some stuff. And that is what I really believe in. I could look at all of my friends now, got a couple of them in front of me and I could draw a line down the middle of those that are successful now in their 40s and what they did in their 20s, did they, did they like go for it? Did they take a bunch of risks? Did they work really hard? Did they try a bunch of stuff? And those that perhaps, you know, kept the partying going maybe a little too long when you don't have responsibility. Right. Most of us have children a little bit later. Now you don't take on responsibilities in terms of financial responsibilities like a mortgage until a little bit later. Now your 20s are the time to try. And I remember a lot of people saying to me in my 20s, like, you work too hard, you need to have more fun. The truth is, if I didn't do the 20s I did, I wouldn't be where I am now.
Mel Robbins
Yes.
Emma Grede
And so you've got to try a few things. And again, don't think that they're all going to work out, but there is a time in your life where it makes sense to put a few bets out there, to throw a few things at the wall, to like go outside of your comfort zone. Like, that is the moment, that's the decade, because you're gonna spend your 30s, like, figuring it out, like, what do I actually wanna do? And putting in the hard work. And then hopefully by the time that you get to your 40s, you've become proficient at something and you can start to choose your choice. But in my experience, not before that.
Mel Robbins
Well, what's interesting is I'm sitting here looking at you and you're 42. And I'm thinking, God, at 40, 42, I was $800,000 in debt. I had liens on the house, my husband's restaurant business was going over. I was unemployed, three kids under 10 about to lose. Like, that's when my life fell apart.
Emma Grede
And look at you now.
Mel Robbins
No shit. So it took.
Emma Grede
Takes some time.
Mel Robbins
Yeah, takes some time. And one of the other things I want to point out though, is you're 42, and when you drop out of college, that's 25 years ago. And I wanna remind you, as you're listening and watching, that you also said in the very beginning, I've only really enjoyed what I'm doing for the last five years.
Emma Grede
Facts.
Mel Robbins
And it's really important, because we don't talk about it enough, that it isn't going to be fun. It isn't going to be a party the whole time. You are not gonna feel like you are pursuing your passion as you are on the journey and figuring it out. And one of the things that also is interesting about your career though, is it took you 10 years between that moment where you dropped out and you're hustling and you're trying to find anybody that will let you just be somewhat near fashion for free.
Emma Grede
For free.
Mel Robbins
Doing anything so you can be close to the thing that you want. Would you speak to that moment where you feel like, oh my God, like, I've been at this for a while and I'm just not getting traction. And the job that I have is paying the bills. Grateful to be able to pay my bills. Like, I'm not gonna like, diss the job that's paying the bills, but it's not aligned with where I thought I would be? How do you stay motivated? How do you keep the dream alive when the first things that you're doing don't really feel like they're going anywhere?
Emma Grede
Yeah, and let's be honest, we all have those times. I had a lot of jobs like that, I really, really did. And what I've always tried to do is find maybe make up a little bit in my head, But I've tried to find the glimmers, right? Like, where is something in here useful? So you're working, you know, like an office job with some kind of clerical role. You are learning to be organized. You are learning what it takes to be the back office support. You are looking at everything that's happening around you. And let me tell you, Mel, and I know this for sure. The fact that I have done all the bad jobs, the fact that I have been there, is what makes me a great leader. Because today, not only can I appreciate every single person around me, I've done those jobs. I know not just what it takes, but I know how it feels, and my staff know that I know how it feels. And there is a different appreciation level for somebody who comes into leadership having done all of the things. And so not only do I look for those glimmers and tell somebody that this job that you're doing that feels pretty mundane isn't because there is value in all work. You just have to find that and you take something. Small pieces. And I think about my experience now as it's a collective of all the things that I've learned. I learned customer service when I was making the sandwiches and when I was delivering the papers. I learned the power of the mornings. And when I worked in the closet at the fashion company, I learned how to do a really horrible job with a smile on my face. Just put it on and it's like all of those little pieces will take you somewhere. And you have to keep in your head and tell yourself, life is long and whatever I'm doing, it all adds up to something, you know, just like all your relationship experiences. And it can feel hard when you're in them, but you can look back and say, there was a reason that thing happened.
Mel Robbins
Yes.
Emma Grede
But you've got to understand, hindsight isn't just a fine thing. It's the thing. It's what makes us who we are eventually. So you've just got to keep that in the front of your mind.
Mel Robbins
This is leading somewhere.
Emma Grede
Everything is leading somewhere. Everything. All parts of it.
Mel Robbins
Absolutely. You know, you started pushing on doors early. I mean, you literally would just walk right into the room and many rooms where you probably felt like you didn't belong. What gave you the confidence to stay when you would get into a room where you're like, I'm not sure I belong here, or I'm not sure this is going to work.
Emma Grede
The way I was raised was really interesting because confidence has never really been my problem. I was raised by, you know, my wonderful mom. And she taught me, you know, she was like, emma, you're not better than anybody else, but nor is anyone better than you. And that stayed with me. And so when I walk into a room now, then, even though with my terrible education, leaving school before I should. Even though I'm highly dyslexic, I know my gifts, I know my strengths. And I know that whatever it is that any of us has to bring is valuable. There is value in all of us. And so, again, you have to really, like, anchor into that piece of you. Like, you have to. You have to believe that you have something special, unique. And even if it's not special and unique, it's what you have to bring. So make the most of it. Figure it out, right? Figure it out, package it up, and go in with some confidence that at least there's just not another you, Right? There's not another you in that room. So whatever you are bringing into that space is something that's not there because there isn't another you. And you have to think deeply and carefully about what those things are and what you add to an organization. And I've done all of that. But in the beginning, you've just got to believe that you have something unique to bring.
Mel Robbins
While you also touched on this earlier about excellence and how when you operate with a level of excellence, even if it's managing the energy at the crappy job you can't stand, people are drawn to it.
Emma Grede
Yes.
Mel Robbins
Drawn to it.
Emma Grede
They really are.
Mel Robbins
Do you have any advice for how you can get yourself into a room? You know what I mean? Like, there's a lot of people that are aspiring to launch a business or raise some money or just put their art out there or be noticed or get the interview. Is there something, some move that you can make or some way that you have found, or maybe an example of somebody that got your attention about how you get into a room? Because you were literally like, I just wanna be adjacent to whatever I'm knock on that door.
Emma Grede
Yeah. I mean, the first thing, Mel, is you gotta get out of your own head. Cause I speak to a lot of people. I've been trying this thing and I've been like, thinking about this for a long time. It's like, what did you do? Like, what did you do? Did you call the store? You want to sell your thing in the store? Do you call them or do you just hoping for somebody to notice you? Did you, like, you want to be an artist? Like, are you making art? Are you putting your work out there? Again, nobody is looking for you. No one. So you again, have to take responsibility and start. Like, get out of the starting blocks and go and do something. And again, it comes down to this idea of fearing what is on the other side. Fear of rejection, fear of being told, no, fear that it won't work. So you gotta get past that point and know that that's all there. And that may well happen, but that's okay too. And I honestly think that the big, the. The big block that people have is getting started, feeling so vulnerable that they can't even start. You can't write a business plan and then file that business plan and then go, I'm gonna, I'm gonna start this business because I've got a plan. It's like, what's in the plan? You've gotta go, you gotta get the thing made. You have to write the email, you have to ask the question. And you cannot network your way into starting. That doesn't work. People right now always say to me, you know, I wish I was invited to this networking event. It's like, that's not the thing. A network is a tool, a way of getting things done. The things that make the difference between starting and not starting is never really what you think. It's never the people that you think. When I look at my business and my life and think, who are the people that have made the biggest differences? I go back, it's like, I didn't know anyone that was going to give me money to start a business. I went to my clients, to people that I worked with, and explained, like, I am going to start this thing and I'm going to need some capital to do it. When I needed advice and a mentor, I didn't know anyone who, like, had a business in East London. Like, not a legit or legal one anyway. You know, it's like, okay, guys, like, that's not the type of business advice I need. So again, I went to clients, and at the end of pitching the marketing campaign, I was there. I would just ask a couple of questions, like, you've got to take your chance, shoot your shot. Don't walk around looking for a mentor. Walk around asking questions. That's what you have to do. And you have to realize that your network will never be what you think it is. It will be the factory, the vendors, your bank relationship, your lawyer. Like that is your network. So work with whatever you've got. Stop looking at what you don't have and look at what you. And make that the network. But you have to start. You gotta start somewhere. Yeah.
Mel Robbins
I keep thinking about the fact that it is so easy to talk, it's so easy to make a plan, it's so easy to network with people. But the real differentiator is what can you show me that you've done? If somebody. If you can't take out your phone and show someone a photograph of the thing that you did, you haven't done anything.
Emma Grede
Yes.
Mel Robbins
You said ask questions. Are there questions that are better than others?
Emma Grede
There are questions that are better than others. And I also think that what happens with a lot of founders is that they get obsessed with their idea, they get obsessed with their individual thing. And often I will be in a situation, somebody is pitching an idea or trying to get advice from me, and I will ask about their space, the competition, their market, and they don't know anything. So when you start something, it's not just about the thing that you're doing. You have to be obsessed with everything else that is adjacent with your entire category. Obsess the price, obsess the distribution, obsess every single part and every dynamic of that thing, because that's what counts. You're bringing your thing into that space, and so that becomes the barrier between what you're starting with and where that thing is going to go. You've got to be really open to what's happening around you, because that is the truth of business. You are in a fight from day one. You open your doors, you start your website. It's like, it's a fight. It's a fight for attention, it's a fight for that customer. But. And you need to be willing and have a real understanding of what problem you're solving for and what it is that you bring uniquely. And that means an understanding of everything else that is around you.
Mel Robbins
What was the first thing that you started?
Emma Grede
So the first thing to say is, I always had a job. From 12, I've had a job. I delivered the papers, I did the babysitting. It's like I worked in the deli. I worked in a million different clothes shops. It's like I've been working forever and ever and ever. And so it's like I drop out of college and I landed in this strange year of just work placement. So I just went from place to place to place, essentially figuring out what I didn't want to do, but getting closer to the Idea of, like, what is the fashion business? How does it work? I landed in a fashion show production company. Sounds glamorous. Absolutely was not. You're building the catwalk shows, so, you know, a designer has this, like, grand idea of what it is that they want to do, and you have to build it. The show goes up, but you spend three months planning it. The show goes up and down in 10 minutes. You don't see it because you're backstage. Everybody goes off to a party that you're not invited to, and then you have to de rig and pack the thing down. That was my life for five years. But in that I met everybody, I understood what the business of fashion was, why we were putting on the shows, and I knew everybody. And so I essentially took the. What I had created there, which was just my reputation as being someone who understood fashion and loved fashion. And I started doing deals for fashion designers with brands. So everybody had this grand idea of what show they wanted to put on, but no budget because they weren't really making sales. And so I would do brand partnerships between designers and brands. And I created an agency. Eventually, after, like, you know, one deal here, one deal there, a little commission there, a little commission there, I became, like, the girl that did this in London. And I started an agency when I was 24. The agency I was in for 10 years, I grew it. I had an office in London, an office in New York, an office in la. Close. The office in la. Grew, grew, grew. And I essentially built this agency group that started acquiring rights, licensing rights, and brand rights. We did product placement in movies. We put celebrities into campaigns.
Mel Robbins
So if I don't understand what that means.
Emma Grede
Yes.
Mel Robbins
What does that mean? That you do brand?
Emma Grede
So. So we. So my agency was an entertainment marketing agency. Okay. So we represented a brand's interests in the world of entertainment. So my client could be, let's call it Mercedes Benz and Mercedes Benz want to put that car into a movie. Or they would like to have Claudia Schiffer in their campaign.
Mel Robbins
Okay.
Emma Grede
Or they would like to do a partnership with a fashion designer and have the interiors of the car. Car looking all gorgeous. I was the girl representing the brands making those marketing deals happen.
Mel Robbins
I want to make sure that as you're listening or watching right now, you actually got a couple really key takeaways and pieces of advice that are buried in the story so far. So you have this vision. You know what you want to do, you want to be in fashion, and so you do everything you can to. To get yourself in as close a Proximity as you can to the thing that you're interested in, so you're volunteering first. You ultimately end up with this crappy job, crappy job, crappy job. But you are in the industry.
Emma Grede
I'm in the mix.
Mel Robbins
You're in the mix. So, number one, I don't care if you don't know what you want to do, get a damn job. And you said for an entire year, you did everything you could in these jobs. You did make for free, but you also were working and making money in delis and everything else.
Emma Grede
Seven days a week, I worked in the clove shop. And then I would work doing my work experience. I was exhausted.
Mel Robbins
But here's something you said that I wanna make sure that as you're listening, you do not miss every single crappy job that you hated actually told you what you didn't want to do. So everything you're doing right now that you don't like is so important because it's getting you closer to understanding what you do like.
Emma Grede
Exactly.
Mel Robbins
And that's really important. And I also love the fact that you kept yourself super busy. The more crappy jobs you have, the faster you're going to figure out what you're actually good at and what you like.
Emma Grede
Oh, and Mel, this is a key point because people ask me all the time, like, how do I figure out what I'm good at? Because I'm like, what you need to do is lean into where you're good. I don't know what I'm good at. It's very, very simple. If it gives you energy, you are good at it. If it takes your energy away and you feel exhausted and depleted, that's what you're bad at. Make it simple. So for me, in negotiations, in like, contract negotiations, I am on fire. Even the bad ones, I am on fire. That's what I'm good at. You give me an Excel sheet with a bunch of numbers, it's like, kill me now, kill me now. That's what I'm not so good at. So you really start to understand, and it's easy in that understanding of yourself that you get closer and closer to where you need to be. And figuring out what you're good at, you don't try to chase a passion. You don't try to find, like, what am I supposed to be doing? Like, what is my purpose? No, no, no. Lean in to what you are good at. I am an excellent negotiator, and that's where I have ended up, where I am today. That's it.
Mel Robbins
The second thing that I want to extract from that story is that in that job of assembling catwalks and, like, being treated like garbage and not being part of the fun stuff, your network appeared, and it wasn't who you thought it was going to be.
Emma Grede
Not in the slightest.
Mel Robbins
Not in the slightest. And so it's in the doing of all the stuff and keeping yourself busy. Cause if you don't keep yourself busy, you're gonna get stuck in your head. That's how you get started. Just get a bunch of jobs and you're gonna start to figure it out. But the network appears, and then all of a sudden you realize, wait a minute, like, they're not making money. So maybe I could get, like, a little brand involved, like Parker Mercedes out front, and they would pay to do that. And I have a buddy who works at the dealership down there. So it doesn't start with the corporate brand. It starts with the local thing, because that's your network.
Emma Grede
And it didn't start with the fashion brands. In my head, I was like, I'm gonna work in fashion. Remember, I didn't have any fashion clients for the first two years. I had a bunch of corporate brands. Because my contacts, when you work in production, it wasn't the PRs and the models and the designers. My contacts with the lighting designers and the riggers and the people that built the stage, and they're like, well, you know, I know the CMO over at, you know, Volvo. I was like, great. Well, give me her number then, you know? So it's like, you just have to go where the energy is, and you take whatever you can take, and you just keep your eyes on the prize because you can pivot. When you have choices, you can pivot. And when you don't have choices, you do whatever is in front of you.
Mel Robbins
Emma, you are just incredible. As I'm sitting here listening to you, I'm almost forgetting that I'm supposed to interview you. I could listen to you all day. This is the perfect moment to take a break. I gotta give our amazing sponsors a chance to share a few words, but holy smokes, you're on fire. And we're just getting started. And while we take this quick break, I want you to think of someone you love. I am sending this ASAP to my daughters, to my son, to a couple of my friends. I mean, this episode is a gift. It has the power to change their life and light a fire under their ass. And, oh, my God, since you haven't been able to do it, Let Emma do it. Don't go anywhere because Emma Breed and I will be waiting for you after this short break. Stay with us. Welcome back. Today, you and I are getting to spend time with the extraordinary Emma Greed. Yes. She is the co founder of Skims and Good American. And she is here to make you aspire to a bigger vision for your life. So Emma, let's just jump right back into it. You're now 34 years old. You've been like running this incredible agency, wheeling and dealing and negotiating and like having all this not having fun yet because it's only the last five years that you really love what you're doing and you have this idea and you end up in a room with Kris Jenner. And what happened?
Emma Grede
Well, you know, I think the important thing for people to understand is that I had spent 10 years building my career at the intersection of brands and fashion. And so I had a fantastic understanding of what works in fashion and where the white space was. I really understood what was missing. What do you mean? So when I talk about white space, it's where the opportunity is. What wasn't out there. Where was there a problem that I could find a solution for? And Good American was a solution. It was that, you know, most women are massively underserved by the fashion industry. 68% of women in America are above a size 16. And yet when you go into a mall, there's maybe two or three shops out of the hundreds of stores that will actually cater to that size. Now we're going back 10 years ago, right, when I first had this idea. So the landscape has shifted a bit, largely because Good American has impacted it. But back then there were very, very few options. And all the options, quite honestly, were bad, horrible. They were ugly. And I had come from a place, you know, in East London. All my family, I are big, curvy women and they have confidence and they feel good about themselves. And especially, you know, you think about black culture, it's like the bigger the but the better. And so we were very much. My idea of beauty was much, much broader than what was being shown in the media. And so I had this idea and I just decided, I was like, I'm going to do this. I have spent the last 10 years building value for all of my clients and I was very well remunerated and I had a fantastic business and I managed to sell that first business. But I wanted to do something that was for myself, that I owned and that I could feel very proud of and start a brand instead of helping all of these other brands. And so what happened is I had seen how celebrity endorsement can really accelerate a brand, because 10 years working on all of those campaigns, you know, Natalie Portman for Dior or putting people in l' Oreal commercials or whatever it was I was doing, I understood how that worked. I understood that talent was a key to unlocking an audience. And so I was like, great, I'm going to start this brand. I'm going to fill the white space, do something that isn't out there, and I'm going to couple it with the talent to make it explode. And so I pitched Chris and Chloe now feels like a legendary meeting. At the time, honestly, it didn't feel like a legendary meeting to me. At the time, I really knew that I had something special. And I had spent a long time figuring out why this was going to be so successful. And, you know, if I go back eight years now, Good American was a complete trailblazer. There was nothing like it. There was a reason that we did a million dollars on day one. And it wasn't because people were like, oh, you know, this sounds like a good idea. It's because they could feel the difference. They understood that we saw them. They felt seen, they felt heard, and they felt represented. And it was a magical moment in my career because it was an idea that I'd come up with. It was an idea that didn't exist, that I'd started from scratch, and it was resonating, it was working. And then I realized I know nothing. I know nothing about running an apparel company. All of my agency experience and opening offices all over the world meant nothing because I was in the garmento business, and I was not a garmento. I knew nothing about making clothes. And so it was like, you know, I had this on the outside, this huge success that was getting so much press and so much attention and growing on social, and yet I had no idea how to run that business.
Mel Robbins
I wanna go back to this meeting and the idea. So the idea was to. How did you frame the idea eight years ago? Cause it was absolutely a trailblazer. So you've got this white space idea that is. This is not like. Everybody's got that uncle who's like, I thought of Uber. Huh? Yeah, okay, sure.
Emma Grede
Did you do it?
Mel Robbins
But no, you had been building toward this moment.
Emma Grede
Yes.
Mel Robbins
For well over a decade. And so you not only had an idea, you had obsessed around the industry. You knew that you were gonna do this. Didn't matter if Kris Jenner and Khloe or anybody said yes. Cause you were gonna do this.
Emma Grede
Oh, I was gonna do it.
Mel Robbins
Oh, hell, yes, you were. And so tell me, though, what was the pitch? And pull up a chair and put us in the meeting in terms of how that meeting went.
Emma Grede
So you have to imagine that for the 10 years previously, I had been in practice, right? I'd pitched the world's biggest CMOs. I'd put the biggest celebrities in the world in the biggest campaigns in the world. I had been on set with the most famous men and women on the planet, and I had won awards in my agency. I was a trailblazer in that business of celebrity, fashion, entertainment. My agency was the best agency doing what it did. And so, in a way, Mel, when I got into that meeting, I thought I had a gift in my hand, and I was ready and willing to share my gift because I knew I had an idea that was golden. And I really approached that meeting saying, hey, I have this golden, brilliant thing that I have researched and I understand, and I'd gone out and made, you know, I had a pair of jeans, and this is going to be the next big thing in fashion. And so my mindset was that this is done. I am launching this thing. It comes out in October. Where do we go from here? And I think that there was something so special in that moment because everybody could see it, everybody understood, stood the reason I was able to attract the right investors and the right partners and the right retailers is because the idea and the execution and what led up to it was so incredibly special. I had done my homework. I knew the difference between me and everybody else. I had obsessed the price point. I could tell you the price of every single pair of jeans that sat on the Nordstrom denim floor. And I could tell you what the content of those jeans were. And I could tell you how my jeans were made differently and why, when a woman put them on, she felt a certain way in them. Because I was obsessed. Obsessed beyond anything that would be reasonable. Because in my head, I had to succeed at something that was mine. Because when you spend your life as a consultant making everybody else look good and being the person behind the scenes and not taking credit for, there's only so much of that that an ego like mine can take. Quite honestly. I was like, wow, look at that campaign. That's their idea again, you know, that I came up with. And so, for me, I was ready to take credit and to do something that meant something to a group of women that I admired, that I felt had been overlooked. And the love that I got Back. Mel, I cannot say the best thing about Good American wasn't the million dollar first day. Wasn't that, you know, all the praise we got. It's the women on the streets, the women that would stop me, you know, I would go into Nordstrom and people, because I used to, you know, I was like, I'm going to work in Nordstrom and I just hang around until a customer comes and I'd be like, have you seen this brand, Good American. And they'll be, oh my God, I just bought very Good American. I'm back to buy my second pair, my third pair, you know, it was feverish and I could tell from all the feedback that I was getting that we had done something really, really special.
Mel Robbins
You know what this is? It's excellence.
Emma Grede
Thank you. Thanks so much.
Mel Robbins
I'm really proud of you.
Emma Grede
Thank you. You're so lovely.
Mel Robbins
So what happened next?
Emma Grede
It's a disaster, Mel. Oh my God.
Mel Robbins
You know, it never feels like you think it's going to feel to get everything you've ever wanted.
Emma Grede
No, it was a disaster.
Mel Robbins
That's what they don't tell you.
Emma Grede
That's what they don't tell you. Yeah. And it really, when I say it was a disaster the first, you know, I will. If you go back to launch day, it was amazing actually, because, you know, you've got your Shopify site. I was in, you know, my husband had an office in LA at that time. I was like just sitting at a conference table with the two people that I'd hired around that conference day at room table. And so we had the Shopify screen up and you can see like the customers are starting to come in and people are starting to purchase. And everyone was like, Emma, you're a chance genius. You're gonna like have amazing sales today. This is like 9 o' clock and I'm like, I'm so clever. And then 10 o' clock rolls around and they're like, well, you know, you're out of all the size whatevers this through this. And I'm like, it's okay, you know, we'll replenish. And this wonderful woman, I will never forget, she still works with me to this day. Melissa Anderson. She says, you do know that we're off calendar. And I thought, why is this woman talking about what does off calendar, off calendar mean? Well, that's the problem now. Cause you're not in fashion, so you wouldn't know what off calendar means. But I was in fashion and I still didn't know what off calendar meant. And if I'd have known I wouldn't have had the problems that I had. So my naivety kind of hit me right there because she was like, you don't have more inventory if you sell through what is here today. It's going to take months to get back into stock and we are not holding any fabric and we don't have the vendors lined up. Because in my head, there is no way that you would sell through that much inventory. It was a brand new brand. It was a brand new idea. You know, even retailers, when we pick, didn't fully understand the concept of carrying all of those sizes. So, long story short, I remember Everybody, by about 11 o', clock, they stopped celebrating me. And by 12, it was like, maybe you're not fit to be the CEO of this company. And I thought, maybe I'm not for about 30 seconds. And I was like, everybody needs to calm down. And at that point, it was like a lesson in customer service because I had started to disappoint people because people were coming on the website and they couldn't get their size, they couldn't get what they wanted. And so I started calling people. And at that point, of course, it's all email. There were no phone numbers. So I was like, what is your phone number? Hi, Sally from Michigan. I'm so sorry. I can get you a pair of jeans in about 13 weeks. And I just went and I went and I went and I emailed and I phoned and I called. And that's when I started to really click, fundamentally understand the business that I was in. Because I had to go backwards before I could go forwards. I had to figure out, how is this juggernaut going to actually work and function? Because I don't understand it.
Mel Robbins
What's so interesting about that story is you would think that selling out of your entire inventory on day one would be a great problem.
Emma Grede
It would be a great problem if you could get some more inventory in the next couple of weeks. Weeks. But if you're out of, you know, again, attention span is very, very short. And I knew that. Two great things. Number one, the majority of my customers couldn't just go elsewhere.
Mel Robbins
Right?
Emma Grede
There was a. There was a limit, but at the end of the day, there were a lot of women buying Good American that could go to any brand. And if you want something, you're going to go elsewhere. And so I had to figure out a way of creating community around what we was doing so that I could be in conversation with my customer.
Mel Robbins
That's pretty unbelievable. So how so because, you know, it'd also be pretty arrogant though, wouldn't it? Isn't it irresponsible to run a business thinking you're gonna sell through all that stuff that fast and then have all that inventory sitting around?
Emma Grede
Well, yeah, like I never imagined, you know, it was expensive product. I didn't think people would swarm us like that. And, you know, there's always a little bit of me again because of where I come from, from. I'm responsible. I treat money like money. To me, it's not just like a number on a piece of paper. I'm like, that's a hundred bucks right there. That's a lot of money to part with. And so in my head, I wasn't going to do something irresponsible and put myself in a situation that I couldn't claw myself out of. And for me, it was about managing expectations and doing things responsibly. And also I was very, very lucky because I had surrounded myself, myself with real business people. And if you go back to though that kind of time, it was all about direct to consumer businesses, growth, growth, growth, doing things, just chasing a customer. And I was like, you know what? I'm going to make a profitable business because that's what I understand. I know that money on the bottom line equates to optionality, meaning that if you are making money, everything that you want to do is possible and if you don't make any money, your choices are limited.
Mel Robbins
Yes.
Emma Grede
End of. It's really basic math. You have to know that. And so for me, it was important to do something at level that made sense to me, that I could control and that I felt comfortable with. And again, I say I, I, I, because it all fell on me. Again, it's about responsibility. I took responsibility for my investors money. I took responsibility for those customers and what their needs were. I took that responsibility extremely, extremely seriously from day one.
Mel Robbins
What is kind of the biggest lesson from your experience launching Good American?
Emma Grede
I would say that my biggest learning has actually been uncovering who is really useful to you when you're building something like that. I don't know that coming from an agency background, that I had an intricate understanding of financial modeling, of how pivotal a relationship with my bank was going to be, of how this thing called a factor, which is a lending facility between you and your retailer was going to be of how those retailer relationships. You know, I was so lucky from the beginning that I had pitched to Pete Nordstrom and Pete Nordstrom got it and he was my champion. I didn't Understand how valuable that was. And those relationships are what allow me to be in business in the way that I am with hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of millions of dollars of sales today. Those relationships, it weren't the press, it ain't the celebrities. It's not like it's none of that. It's none of the things that I was like, ooh, this is none of that. It's all of the behind the scenes stuff. It's all of the foundational people and relationships that allow you to go where you need to go.
Mel Robbins
It's the unsexy stuff. It honestly goes all the way back to working at that crappy job building catwalks, because it was all the people behind the scenes, that is the network. And we're all so busy chasing the shiny stuff that to your point, you've already said it. Look at what's right in front of you. Work with what you have. Work with what you have and go from there. How did Skims come to start?
Emma Grede
Well, skims was a bit different because that was Kim's idea. Kim had the idea of starting this shapewear company. And I think that I was a trusted partner of the family by that point.
Mel Robbins
Got it.
Emma Grede
And I just, again, when I get excited about something, Mel, I'm like, is that the best idea ever?
Mel Robbins
You know, that's one of those products. It's just like, that makes so much sense and it is so obviously the right thing to do. And so on brand and so needed and solves a problem and just. Well, I. I should say Skims is a sponsor of this podcast. Yes, Skims only bras I wear. Go Skims. You did not. You did not pay me to do that. Well, let's talk, though, about your experience investing and being a judge on Shark Tank. Cause you've got to have seen some amazing pitches and some really horrible ones. You know, everybody wants to take their shot, right? What advice do you have for somebody who can get into the room or happens to be introduced to somebody, and you want to take your shot and make your pitch? How do you do it without being overbearing or inappropriate or. You know what I'm saying?
Emma Grede
Yeah, totally. So let's just talk about this for a second in terms of what is most important for a pitch, right? Because that's the first thing that people get wrong. A lot of fantastic, brilliant, successful entrepreneurs are excellent storytellers. So they're not coming into you going like, hi, I've got this thing and it's 5.99 and it does dah.
Mel Robbins
Dah, dah.
Emma Grede
They're telling you a story. They are weaving a narrative in your mind for what this thing does, for the solution, for how it came to be. And they're going all around that. But they are taking you on a journey. And you're like, you're in. You're in like you're being Red Goldilocks, right? It's like. And you're eating it up. And that is the starting point. Because to be an incredible entrepreneur, you've got to be able to see sell, and you got to be able to storytell. And those two things are the things that I think people don't think about enough. When you can craft a story and a narrative that is compelling to your customers, you got them, you got them hooked. That is your sales pitch. So really figuring that out and practicing it. I can't tell you how many times I sat down in a mirror and spoke about Good American before I met Pete Nordstrom. Like maybe 50 times. I did that pitch over and over and over and over again. Remember, Mel? I knew nothing about the construction of denim. I was a marketing kid who went into product. So I had to like really finesse it and I had to again, you know, I'm not a plus size woman, but I had to embody my customer and embody who I was solving for. So the first thing is like, get your storytelling down and make sure you're not just flogging a product. You are telling an interesting, compelling narrative. And then you got to work out your timing. Because if you're in a party, if you are at a social event, if you're on a quick ride, like, that's not the time, that's not it. And you would be better saying, I've got something that would be really interesting to you. And I wonder if you've got a good five minutes to do it. Because if you get that timing off right, the person is not there to receive your thing. My next thing is about your attitude. You can be excited, you can be exuberant, you can actually even be a little bit arrogant, right? That is fine. So long as you know you're shit. And you really need to know it. You really need to know. And when I say you need to know it, you need to know your competition, you need to know what you're up against. You need to have figured all of those things out. Because when you have have your chance, you have to be ready. There is no practice. There is no. It's like that's your moment. So you got to figure Those things out way ahead of time. That's how you do a really great and really compelling pitch.
Mel Robbins
Excellence again.
Emma Grede
We're back to it.
Mel Robbins
We're back to it.
Emma Grede
We're back to it.
Mel Robbins
We're back to excellence.
Emma Grede
And excellence can be practiced, right?
Mel Robbins
Like, if you. It actually needs. Excellence does not show up.
Emma Grede
No. You've got to try, and you've got to sit in front of someone and fake pitch it. You know, you've got to do that, and you've got to be willing to take the feedback. You know, everyone used to say to me, emma, you're fantastic. You just speak really fast. And I'd be like, I do, really? What do you mean? I speak too fast? You know, and so I had to learn to slow it down a little bit. But you have to be willing to take that feedback.
Mel Robbins
So for someone who wants to start a business, what's the best piece of advice to give them?
Emma Grede
I think my best advice is that. And this is where I want to be really honest now. Not everybody should start a business, right? And so I think that you have to really think about what you're optimizing for. What are you trying to do? Here we are in America. America is an incredible place to be successful, and that isn't always about starting a business. We've romanticized this idea of what it means to be a founder. It might be that you are the type of person that thrives on comfort, and you need to know what's happening next month and the month after. That's not a founder. That's not an entrepreneur. And you would be better working for one of the great companies that we have in this country. You can have a fantastic, beautiful, ambitious, entrepreneurial corporate career in this country. And so you really need to be honest with yourself about who are you and what are you trying to optimize for. Do you want to be that? Are you somebody that is risk adverse? Are you somebody that's willing to put it all on the line? Are you at the stage in your life where that's even an option for you? Or do you have kids and a mortgage and parents that you're looking after? So the first thing is, let's just be honest and not go around telling everyone that everyone should start a business and everyone's on an entrepreneur because they're just not. That might not be what people want to hear, but that is the truth.
Mel Robbins
That's what they need to hear. That's what they need to hear. That is fantastic, honest advice. What's the worst thing that Somebody could do if they know, okay, I can handle the uncertainty. I cannot let this thing go. I am going to do this thing. What's the worst thing that they could do?
Emma Grede
Be short sighted. You have to be long term. I don't know. Any business that does what it does in the movies, it takes time. It takes so much time. And for you to get in your stride and be good at something and start hiring people and those people to work out and your things that start tracking and the retailers to take notice and then the press to set up, that takes time. So you have to know that nothing happens overnight. And are you willing to commit yourself to this thing for the next few years, 10 years?
Mel Robbins
Honestly? That's what it takes.
Emma Grede
That's what it takes.
Mel Robbins
That's what it takes.
Emma Grede
That's what it takes.
Mel Robbins
And if you're not willing to do it for 10 years, then you're not actually committed to it.
Emma Grede
Yeah, we overestimate what we can do in a year.
Mel Robbins
It's true. It's true. So if somebody is listening right now or they have someone in their life that either just lost their job because there's a lot of people losing their jobs right now, or maybe they just want a pivot, they're thinking about reinvention or they want to start a business. If you had to really name the skill that you believe is going to be the most marketable and important in the next few years, what do you think that skill is that somebody should either focus on or learn or double down on?
Emma Grede
So the first thing is you have to figure out what you really care about, what you uniquely can get obsessed over, and then you're going to have to work out how AI is going to disrupt that business and learn it. And I talk about this all the time because by and large, male women missed out on the first tech boom, right? There are far too few female engineers, there are far too few female coders because we weren't in it in the same way that the guys were in it from the beginning. And then the education followed that path and the training and the jobs and the seniority, it all went that way. We must not miss out on this AI boom. If you ain't using it, use it now. And I'm not talking ChatGPT as your search engine default instead of Google. I'm talking about whatever it is that you do if you are an editor, if you are working in planning or merchandising in a fashion company, whatever it is that your job is now, figure out the way you can Utilize AI tools and start learning them and force yourself to learn them, because that's the future. That's where we're going. And, you know, I know that so many people are like, oh, my goodness, I don't want more technology in my life. I'm just trying to not use my phone as much. I want to get back to real life and real people. You can't avoid it. We've never been able to stop progress and nor should we want to. And there's going to be a lot of great stuff that comes out of this AI boom, and you have to be at the forefront of it. So it's like, start to figure out how you can ingratiate it into your life and your work now, and something will start to emerge. You'll start to understand it, see where the gaps are, get into that white space. You'll start to learn something differently, and it will become habitual for you.
Mel Robbins
I could not agree more. How are you using it?
Emma Grede
Oh, in so many different ways. Well, you know, because for my own podcast, the team is minuscule. So we're using it in a lot of ways, whether it's for research or transcript or pulling certain clips, but there's so many ways. And you know, what I did actually two years ago in the office was really say to everyone, whoever can use AI in their department, here's a bonus. We have a bonus system. And it was so interesting. You think it would come from the marketing department or the real creative departments? Absolutely not. It was the accounts team that found a way to systematically figure out chargebacks, which is a huge part of our business, right?
Mel Robbins
Yes.
Emma Grede
And I was like, are you kidding? Not only saving the company, actually hundreds of thousands of dollars, but coming out of the department that you would think is less dynamic. And so I think when you start to challenge people to find efficiencies in the way they work, it really is, like, the best thing that's happened to us.
Mel Robbins
Emma, if the person who is hanging on every single amazing word that comes out of your mouth takes one thing and does one thing. Today, out of everything that you've shared, what is the one thing that is the most important thing to do?
Emma Grede
You have to get out of your head. You have to change the narrative that fills you with the fear that stops you from moving. And I say that because I've been there. I've been in a job where I've been dreaming of something else for the longest time, and I've written proposals and I've done presentations and I filed them on My desktop. And then I left them and I didn't see the light of day. And guess what? The first one I did is the one that you're wearing today. You're wearing the jeans you're wearing, the idea that made it off of my desktop. That's it. And if I can do it, anyone can do it now. Anyone.
Mel Robbins
Emma Greed, what are your parting words?
Emma Grede
You know, honestly, Mel, I'm so grateful to you. I'm so grateful, unbelievably grateful that you would ask me to come here. And, you know, I wish I had something better to say, but my honest truth is that I dreamt of being who I am now. But I just didn't let the dream stay a dream. Right? It's like I just decided that I would have to get up and make it a reality. That if I were and if I tried and if I was willing to kind of sit with the failure and the knockbacks, that would be okay. Because eventually it would come. And so I just want to say the same to everyone else. Eventually your time will come. That's it. You have to know that about yourself. That is just it.
Mel Robbins
Well, here's what I know about you. You are a force to be reckoned with.
Emma Grede
Thank you.
Mel Robbins
And you understood the assignment and you showed up and lit the biggest fire, not only inside the person that has been listening and watching, but also inside me. I think you are a gift. You deserve every single bit of success that you have worked your ass off for.
Emma Grede
Thank you.
Mel Robbins
And there's no doubt in my mind that there will be a million other Emma Greeds that are inspired by your story and the generosity of the wisdom that you have shared with us today. I love you. I am so grateful to have met you, to have learned from you, to feel so inspired by you. And thank you. Thank you for being here.
Emma Grede
Thank you for having me. It's been a joy. Thank you, Mel.
Mel Robbins
And thank you. Thank you for listening to something that I know will change the course of your life, because this particular episode is going to change the course of mind. Like, I literally want to stop talking and go do something. I am so fired up after being with Emma and being with you. And so take this gift, share it with everybody you know, and then make yourself get to work. And in case nobody else has told you, let me be the first person to say, as your friend, that I love you. And I believe, and I believe in your ability to aspire to amazing things, to get to work, to figure it out. And Emma just taught you exactly what to do to put it in motion. Now go do it, because you know your friend Mel is gonna be cheering you on every step of the way. Alrighty. She lit a fire under my ass, so I gotta get out of here, but I will see you in the very next episode. The moment you hit play.
Emma Grede
You get very used to it. You don't even think about it.
Mel Robbins
Oh, my gosh. All right, I gotta stick that in my bra, then I'm gonna do it. If I can get in there. Okay.
Emma Grede
Yep.
Mel Robbins
Okay.
Emma Grede
Oh, you're putting it in.
Mel Robbins
I am.
Emma Grede
She's putting it in her bra. Well, it is. It's a great place to have a crystal because it's like, you know.
Mel Robbins
Oh, I didn't put it on the hard side sometimes. You did not. You did not pay me to do that.
Emma Grede
I. I only type. I knew. I knew you were wearing skims today, and we all know why. Mel, you're the best. You're like. Literally. I don't know whether to think about what I was saying or take notes about what Mel was saying. Like, in my head, I was like, hell, I'm gonna watch this one. Or not. You are so excellent at this. It's a joke. You're so amazing.
Mel Robbins
This is one of the best conversations we've ever, ever, ever had.
Emma Grede
No, don't even say that much. I'm so grateful to you.
Mel Robbins
Such a. A talented storyteller. We're gonna love you, Blanket. Oh, and one more thing. And no, this is not a blooper. This is the legal language. You know, what the lawyers write and what I need to read to you. This podcast is presented solely for educational and entertainment purposes. I'm just your friend. I am not a licensed therapist, and this podcast is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Got it? Good. I'll see you in the next episode. SiriusXM podcasts.
Date: September 1, 2025
Host: Mel Robbins
Guest: Emma Grede (Co-founder/CEO, Good American, SKIMS, Safely)
In this electrifying and deeply motivational episode, Mel Robbins sits down with Emma Grede—self-made billionaire, fashion industry powerhouse, Shark Tank judge, and inspiring advocate for representation. The conversation dives far beyond business, revealing Emma’s personal blueprint for dreaming big and achieving against all odds, starting from her tough upbringing in East London to the helm of globally influential brands.
Listeners are guided through Emma’s actionable philosophies on responsibility, mindset, resilience, and the power of authenticity. This episode is a powerhouse of storytelling, practical advice, and a rallying call for anyone ready to change their life—regardless of where they’re starting.
[05:18] Emma Grede:
[06:46] Emma Grede:
[09:19] Emma Grede:
[13:08] Emma Grede:
[18:08] Emma Grede:
[20:53] - [31:23]
[33:01] - [34:08]
[34:47] Emma Grede:
[40:19] - [41:36]
[60:38] - [68:27]
[68:34] - [73:43]
[45:32] - [50:55]
[76:52] - [79:41]
[80:23] - [82:55]
[83:41] Emma Grede:
[86:53] Emma Grede:
On mindset:
“When you bring those two things together, it allows you to be really, really purposeful and the outcome starts to just manifest.” (Emma, 05:56)
On self-belief and starting from nothing: “You don't have to give up who you are and what made you, you. If you leave that physical space, you can still be and have that heart of gold and that sense of scrappiness.” (Emma, 09:19)
On persistence: “I didn't take it personally. I thought they didn't get the letter because I'm so good and I have so much to offer ... They just must not know yet.” (Emma, 27:14)
On comparison and perfection:
“Perfectionism is when you are focused on the outside. ... Excellence is on the inside because excellence is about the effort in ...” (Mel, 31:23)
On resilience:
“If what you've got is keeping you stuck, leave it. Like, walk away.” (Emma, 15:31)
On navigating early career: “Be excellent at where you're at, at whatever you're doing, because that has some kind of invisible magnetic pull.” (Emma, 22:11)
On the long game: “People tend to overestimate what they can do in a year and underestimate what can actually happen in a decade.” (Emma, 36:48)
On embracing imperfection:
“Everything you want is there. It's just gotta find you working, and that's it. ... You gotta do. And that's where this perfectionist trap is poisonous for us.” (Emma, 33:01)
On self-compassion: “You gotta be real careful that your biggest enemy isn't living between your two ears.” (Emma, 31:23)
On starting a business: “Not everybody should start a business, right? ... We’ve romanticized this idea of what it means to be a founder.” (Emma, 80:23)
On innovation and AI: “We must not miss out on this AI boom. If you ain't using it, use it now.” (Emma, 83:41)
“I dreamt of being who I am now. But I just didn’t let the dream stay a dream. Right? ... Eventually your time will come. That’s it. You have to know that about yourself.”
This is the podcast episode to send to anyone who needs a jolt of courage, clarity, and the unvarnished truth about what it takes to build a life you’re proud of.