The Sampler - End of Year Bonus Episode

Summary

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The Musers The Podcast: The Sampler - End of Year Bonus Episode

Date: December 31, 2025
Hosts: George Dunham, Craig “Junior” Miller, Gordon Keith
Podcast Network: Cumulus Podcast Network

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Episode Overview

This end-of-year “sampler” episode is designed as a highlight reel and audio primer, both for new listeners curious about The Musers phenomenon and longtime fans who've missed some of their 25 podcast episodes. It traverses the origins of the show, their unique podcast approach separate from their legendary Dallas “Ticket” morning show, and a curated collection of the trio’s most memorable, hilarious, and touching stories and moments from the past year.

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Key Themes & Discussions

1. Why Do a Podcast?

• Difference from the radio show: The Musers discuss how podcasting allows for longer, more relaxed, and intimate conversations compared to the constraints and structure of their radio show.
  • Craig: “…as if the three of us were to do one our 8:15 segments on the radio show. It’s very general interest. It’s kind of life stuff.” (01:25)
  • Gordon: “This is more intimate. And I’m going to start using my NPR voice…” (01:00)
• Freedom of the medium: The guys reflect on the weird sense of privacy in podcasting, even though "outrageous" things said on-podcast can still become widely known.
  • Gordon: "...there are certain things that I would like to talk about that I would not feel comfortable broadcasting, but would feel comfortable podcasting. And yet I have no idea why that is." (03:20)

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2. Behind the Jerry Jones Impression

Origins and Impact

• George and Craig praise Gordon's Jerry Jones parody as cultural shorthand for the Cowboys’ owner among fans.
  • Craig: "That is how they see Jerry is through your impersonation of him." (04:15)
  • Gordon: “It’s a caricature of him. He’s already a caricature… and then started doing that voice. And I can’t even remember exactly how it started…” (04:41)
• Jerry’s reaction: Surprisingly, Jerry Jones finds it flattering, even enjoying the ribbing of his son.
  • Craig: “And they really give it to Jerry Jr. too… Like, Jerry thought that was funny.” (06:12)

The Hollywood Story

• Gordon shares how his parody led to a role voicing animated Jerry Jones on Adult Swim’s ‘Keeping up with the Joneses’.
  • Gordon: “…I get the follow up after that meeting that, yeah, you know, you got the deal. Where do we send the contract to? What’s your agent’s name? I said, what agent? … I have a Hollywood Reporter story here…” (08:38)
  • Read in: “The animated version of Jones… will be a character in the series, though voiced by an actor, not Jones himself.” (09:32)

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3. Friendship Origins & College Antics

The Early Years

• Craig and George reminisce about their goof-off college years at North Texas:
  • Pranking each other in classrooms to get laughs, sabotaging each other's study plans in favor of pizza at Mr. Gaddy’s.
    • Craig: “And I'd have to inform him that I was going to the library. And he said, ‘Okay, if I find you, you have to stop studying and we’re going to go to Mr. Gaddy’s and eat buffet pizza.’ And I’m like, okay, that sounds fair.” (12:46)
  • Their GPA “reflected” their priorities.

Early Days at The Ticket

• Feeling unprepared but emboldened by their bond:
  • George: “I felt good about it because I was with Craig. You know, I thought, hey, I’m just hanging out with Craig. I can do that. I have no idea what we’re going to talk about.” (15:11)

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4. Stories of Youthful Adventure

Craig’s 180-Mile Teenage Bike Trek

• At 14, Craig rides solo across two states to a cousin’s wedding:
  • Encouraged by his parents, he cycles 180 miles over two days, hitchhiking the final 10 miles when exhausted.
    • Craig: “…I looked back at that and my parents believing in me that I could do something like that. That was one of those benchmark moments again in my life. And it was because of the bicycle that gave me such confidence.” (23:02)

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5. The Musers’ Chemistry & Real Relationships

George vs. Gordo: Do They Really Hate Each Other?

• Revelation of a 30-year-old conflict and its healing:
  • George: “My answer… sometimes I really am mad at him… But yeah, no, I don’t hate him. Of course we love each other, but we’ve had our challenges…” (25:56)
  • Craig elicits a story never before aired:
    • Prank call crossing the line:
      • George: “…one of our early pranks… But then he started getting my, like, my family involved… and I found that out from our program… that Gordon went in the production room and erased all of [the prank call tapes]. That was the moment I knew, okay, Gordon’s on my side…” (30:38)
    • Gordon: “…that audio deserves no place in this world.” (32:22)
    • George: “And you’re a good man. Wow, that’s like one of the nicest things anyone’s ever said to me after something like that.” (32:34)

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6. Road Trip Antics & Broke Broadcasters

• Unvarnished tales of broke weekends and failed pick-up attempts:
  • Junior & Gordo’s Port Aransas adventure:
    • Cheap hotels, gross condos, and “joke dancing” for girls at a dive bar; a recurring improv game of making up biography facts for strangers (“extremely gay” phase).
      • Gordon: “You each try to introduce biographical facts about the other one that are untrue that the other guy then has to respond to…” (37:01)
      • No showers for days, confirmed by their college buddy’s disgust when passing through San Antonio:
        • Craig: “Me and that fish down there. About the same.” (35:16)

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7. Courage, Rejection, and Resilience

• Hardest Things Ever Done:
  • Craig recounts the anxiety-ridden process of asking out Grace, North Texas’ “prettiest girl” — a meticulous, months-long mission that ended in “lunch, not love,” but changed his confidence.
    • Craig: “I am going to ask her out… But I was so obsessed with asking her out, and I just, I had put it on my bucket list.” (39:40)
    • He persists and scores a date, despite her already having a boyfriend.

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8. Parental Lessons & Pubescent Discoveries

• Gordon’s childhood “pornography” scandal:
  • Finds a topless coin in his Baptist minister father’s sock drawer, proudly shows classmates, gets busted, and learns it was “change” left in the collection plate (and a source of endless family embarrassment).
    • Gordon: “This is how hard up we were for seeing a naked woman… even just a stamped coin…” (44:56)

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9. Procrastination, Pets, and Pettiness

• A segment on procrastination and household incompetence:
  • Gordon’s leaking faucet left for years; George’s perpetually deflating, high-tech bed they can’t get serviced.
    • Gordon: “So for the past two years, I’ve had a couple leaking faucets… I got to tear out the wall and just replace all the works. It’s been two years now.” (48:04)

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10. “Cheating Death” and the Oxygen Mask Lie

• Craig’s terrifying airplane incident, told with dry humor:
  • Sudden cabin depressurization on a Ticket Cowboys trip; forced nosedive so steep and long that all believe they’re about to die.
    • Craig: “And then as we all get our masks on, the plane goes into a nosedive…” (56:05)
  • FAA’s grim after-the-fact visit:
    • Craig: “That’s basically what an oxygen mask is. Over 30,000ft… you have no chance.” (58:47)
    • Gordon: “I think he was just trying to scare you.” (58:49)

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11. Gordon’s Collecting Obsessions: Typewriters, Guitars, and Oswald’s Bathtub

• A rundown of Gordon’s many (many) peculiar collecting hobbies:

  • “Around 200” typewriters, “about 100” guitars, and, famously… the bathtub once used by Lee Harvey Oswald.
    • Gordon: “I did end up buying Lee Harvey Oswald’s old bathtub from one of his apartment buildings they were tearing down.” (63:45)
    • Why save it? “If you had not done that, that bathtub would be in some landfill.” (64:01)

• Poignant musing on the places where history happened but life goes on for the unaware:

  • Gordon: “You’re seeing this mixture of life is going on now without a thought of what happened back then…” (62:19)
    • “It’s the tragedy of the person who means the most to you in the world dies. And the insult that the world would go on after that.” (63:19)

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12. Heartfelt End: The Blue Ribbon Story

• George shares a childhood swimming story about his first, hard-won ribbon and the lasting message about courage and affirmation:
  • George: “He said, ‘that was really brave what you did tonight. And this is what goes to winners.’ …all my other first place ribbons and trophies, I threw them away. But I kept that because it really taught me a powerful lesson.” (68:27)
  • Craig: “That’s great that coach did that for you.” (69:38)
  • George: “Yeah… Maybe sometimes you should [give ribbons to everyone], because here, 50 some odd years later, I still have that as… you’re going to have to work through this. And I’ve looked down at that ribbon.” (69:41)

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• On Podcasting’s Freedom:
  • “Let me have my delusion, okay? Let me hold on to my delusion.” – Gordon (03:54)
• On Impersonating Jerry Jones:
  • “Jerry Jones has given me a career.” – Gordon (05:26)
• On Stopping a Prank Gone Too Far:
  • “That audio deserves no place in this world.” – Gordon (32:22)
• On Parenting & Belief:
  • “The biggest confidence builder… anything my parents ever did for me to think that much of me… I felt like I grew up 10 years in those two days.” – Craig (23:14)
• On Risk and Survival:
  • “All I could think of… wow, I can’t believe I’m going to die in a plane crash. This is really crazy.” – Craig (56:58)
• On Collecting Oswald’s Bathtub:
  • “ASSASSIN’S BATHTUB.” – Gordon (64:36)
• On Affirmation:
  • “To me, when someone says, ‘You’re a good man.’ That hits me in the heart more than any other phrase ever.” – Gordon (33:23)

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Recommended Timestamps

• [00:51] Differences between podcast and radio, motivation for the podcast
• [04:15] Jerry Jones parody and its cultural impact
• [08:38] Gordon's Hollywood story: Adult Swim & the Joneses
• [11:03] College hijinks and the roots of their chemistry
• [16:27] Craig's epic 14-year-old bike ride
• [25:33] "Does George really hate Gordon?": Airing out conflict & healing
• [33:42] Recounting the infamous Port Aransas road trip
• [38:48] The hardest things ever done: asking out Grace
• [43:59] Gordon’s coin and the Baptist minister's son moment
• [47:59] Admitting to procrastination: broken beds & leaking faucets
• [53:05] Cheating death on a Cowboys flyaway
• [59:22] Gordon’s collecting obsessions, including Oswald’s tub
• [64:55] The blue ribbon: heart, effort, and a lesson that lasts

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Final Note

This episode is a varied, emotional, and always hilarious tribute — a distillation of The Musers’ enduring on-air magic. Underneath the jokes, the Musers reveal why generations of P1s keep listening: deep friendship, fearless self-examination, and a gift for making every ordinary moment funny, meaningful, or both.

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Transcript

[A]

I'm Craig.

[B]

I'm George.

[C]

I'm Gordon. Your favorite.

[A]

Yeah, we should make that clear very early on that the official name of this is the Musers the Podcast.

[B]

So if you're saying too many these.

[C]

In there, that's fine.

[A]

If you're saying the Musers Podcast, you're saying it incorrectly. It's the Musers the Podcast.

[D]

Welcome to the Musers the Podcast. The guys now have done 25 episodes and we thought we'd take this opportunity to put together a sort of audio primer for Those long time P1s who may not have heard all the episodes or started listening yet. Or maybe you're one of these people who has a friend or an acquaintance that's told you a lot about the guys and you're curious as to what this is all about. So this would be a great place to start. So we'll begin with the obvious from episode one. Whatever we want.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

So why the hell are we doing a podcast? Seems like we need to address that right out of the gate. A podcast different from the radio show.

[B]

Totally differently different.

[C]

This is more intimate. And I'm going to start using my NPR voice because I've always wanted to use my NPR voice. One thing people have been very curious about is we do. For those of you who are just discovering us, who think, wow, these guys are just podcasters now, we also have a radio show too. So I'm sure there can be two different delivery sources for the Musers. The Musers, the radio show. The Musers, the podcast.

[A]

I think for me it's part about the future. We cut back our radio hours and now I find that instead of scrambling for topics to fill four and a half hours, I find that I come to the end of the day after a three hour show and I'm like, wow, we didn't even talk about this. And I've got a lot to say about this. So this gives us another outlet. But I've always pictured this podcast as if the three of us were to do one our 815 segments on the radio show. It's very general interest. It's kind of life stuff. If it's a very sportsy day, we'll do sports at 8:15. But a lot of times we do magazine talk or summer camp talk or something like that at 8:15. And so often we get to the end of that 15 minute segment and I think I could have Talked for another 30 minutes about this.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And that's what I think this podcast can serve as. It's an elongated conversation about these topics that we really like that we are limited on the radio side because we only have 12 minutes in that segment where we can actually take some time to have a long form conversation.

[B]

Yeah. And I think you can do things with podcasts that would not work on radio. I know people that listen to specific podcasts that. Whether it's gardening or.

[C]

Or something else that I want to start listening to. Gardening.

[B]

If you did that every day, if you did that every day on radio, I don't think it worked very well.

[C]

Okay, so in doing things that you do here that you wouldn't do on the radio, would you be willing to hit record on your iPhone and record yourself going number two and playing it on this podcast? Because it's very secret. Behind the scenes, peeling back the showing people the prep that you do, the prep for delivering content.

[B]

No.

[C]

Here's the reason why I'm doing a podcast, because there are certain things that I would like to talk about that I would not feel comfortable broadcasting, but would feel comfortable podcasting. And yet I have no idea why that is. As if one of them. As if one of them is secret and the other one isn't. But it's some weird psychological difference to me.

[B]

But still, on the record, if you say something outrageous, someone's going to say, did you hear what the muser said on the podcast?

[C]

The muser's the podcast.

[B]

And then someone will put it on radio or social media and it'll be everywhere.

[C]

I know, but let me have my delusion, okay? Let me hold on to my delusion.

[D]

For much of the last 30 years, one of the most popular things on the show is Gordon's impersonation of Cowboys owner Jerry Jones. And during the podcast, Gordon not only explained the origins of his impersonation, but also broke some exciting news from episode five.

[A]

Outside of Jerry, I would say in Dallas Fort Worth, the person that has done more to paint and construct his image is you, Gordon, with your impersonation of Jerry. Yeah, I don't think there's any doubt that that has. Has in the mind of Cowboys fans who also listen to our radio station in Dallas. That is how they see Jerry is through your impersonation of him.

[C]

Yeah, it's kind of because it's a caricature of him. He's already a caricature, has a life that's like a caricature. And then started doing that voice. And I can't even remember exactly how it started. I'm pretty sure it started on this show. You guys asked me if I could Do a Jerry Jones back in year.

[A]

One or two 90s.

[C]

And I started off with that ridiculous voice, which does not sound like him. That talking down like this and everything, doing that positivity. And. And, yeah, because he gave us so much material, we could do him often. And then we're doing him so often, and then he just becomes the mainstay character in a lot of ways, I guess. Jerry Jones has given me a career.

[A]

It's your signature character.

[B]

It is. Do you remember when he first figured out, okay, that's the guy who impersonates me?

[C]

I don't. I don't know when he. He first figured it out. I mean, I've had to. It's been reintroduced to him a few times. You know, it'd be the PR director Rich at the time, you know, would mention to Jerry, this is the guy that does you your fake voice. And then Jerry would always light up and shake my hand. And he was very thrilled, I guess, in some way, that because he hears about it enough that he's meeting the guy who imitates him. Like, I think he feels it some way. Flattering.

[A]

Isn't that interesting?

[C]

Which, if you listen to the content, it's the least flattering stuff you could possibly do about another human.

[A]

I remember one time when we were talking to Jerry about this, about the fake Jerry, and he was with somebody else, I can't remember, and he said, oh, yeah, these are the guys that do the fake Jerry voice on their show. And then he turned to one of his buddies and hit him and goes. And they really give it to Jerry Jr. Too. Like, Jerry thought that was funny.

[C]

Yeah. That his son was being skewered.

[A]

Which is great.

[C]

That I can't believe that. So he's aware of some of the content that's on there.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

But once again, the thick skin of Jerry, he just lets it roll off of him.

[B]

Because you're talking about him and you're talking about the cowboys.

[C]

Yeah, but George, we're talking about him so personally and so derogatorily.

[B]

I know.

[C]

Derogatory. Derogatorily.

[B]

So as the. As the new show hits Netflix, we were informed by you, Gordon.

[C]

Yes, sir.

[B]

That all of a sudden you're gonna be on the Cartoon Network impersonating Jerry.

[C]

So, yeah, Hollywood came a call in for me, and I've told a little bit of this story before, but I started getting these emails from a woman who claimed she was a Hollywood casting agent. And I'm really bad about returning emails and going through it. I mean, I have emails stacked up from about 15 years of stuff I'm getting around to responding to. So I see it. I didn't respond and I saw she sent a follow up. Don't respond. Third one, fourth one. I just said, okay, I'll get to it. I'll get to it. So time goes on and eventually my. Our boss from the radio station in Dallas, he says, hey, this woman called me up. She's a casting director for Warner Brothers in la and they're trying to get a hold of you and you won't respond to their emails. She asked if I could get a hold of you.

[B]

Welcome to our world.

[C]

So I felt horrible, of course, and I responded to her and everything and she says, yeah, there's this new show and it has Jerry Jones in it and the. One of the creators has been asking, you know, to want you to read for it, to come in and read for this part of Jerry Jones. And so I said, yeah, that sounds good to me. And she set it up. We had this big zoom call and I was pretty intimidated by this because it's like I've never done anything like that before in my life. I'm gonna read for a part on a national show as a.

[B]

In that ridiculous voice.

[C]

In that ridiculous voice. And so when it comes time for the zoom call, you know, there's all those people in the room and I have to do the Jerry voice. And they were great and nice and lo and behold, I get the follow up after that meeting that, yeah, you know, you got the deal. Where do we send the contract to? What's your agent's name? I said, what agent? I need to do agent. I don't have agent. So I get this Hollywood. I have a Hollywood Reporter story here. Okay, okay. Very official headline, Adult Swim, which is what this cartoon is going to be on the Adult Swim block of programming. Adult Swim tackles Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones and latest series, Keeping up with the Joneses will follow a family trying to fit in with their wealthy Dallas neighbors. Okay, so that's the headline. Okay, so wait till you hear how much I mention it here. Like, it's pretty impressive. Adult Swim's newest series will brush up against the world of the NFL, or at least its most famous team owner. The cable network has ordered a series called Keeping up with the Joneses from creator Hugh Davidson, which is the guy that tracked me down and found me. He used to live in Texas. Big spurs fan. Rachel Ramirez, Larry Dorff, Those are the three creators and producers. The 10 episode half hour show will chronicle the Newbery Family of Dallas as they try to keep up with their staggeringly wealthy neighbors, including Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones, who lives next door. The animated version of Jones Get Ready will be a character in the series, though voiced by an actor, not Jones himself.

[B]

An actor.

[A]

So that's pretty big.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

National Hollywood Reporter can't specifically identify you.

[C]

When you're such a non quantity like I am. You just reference as an actor.

[A]

Well, you know what?

[C]

But that's an upgrade for me because I'm not even an actor.

[A]

After the show comes out, then they'll know your name. They'll all.

[C]

All know my name, yeah.

[D]

The origins of the show date back to Craig and George knowing each other since their college days at North Texas. Here they explain how they wasted a lot of time and even some of the earliest days after they started working at the ticket from episode two. It's funnier over here.

[B]

Yeah. Once our friendship formed, we always talk about wasting time. I'm so ashamed. If I could go back and talk to myself at 18 years old, I would say keep having a good time, but really focus in just a little bit on the task at hand here. To get a degree, you don't have to be a jackass 24 hours a day. But I was constantly trying to make him laugh, whether that was walking. Then we found each other's schedules, the classes we didn't have together. And the goal was to crack the other guy up by acting like you were in a conversation in the hallway and you carried it into their classroom while class was going on.

[C]

Like you're mistakenly going in that classroom.

[B]

Yes. While you're finishing off. Okay, Bill, see you later. Oh, gosh, I'm so sorry. And then you'd walk out of class, everyone die laughing. And then I think he brought in. You're gonna die about this. What's that? Yeah, I think the answer is Danny White. And then he would walk into the class and go, oh, gosh, I'm so sorry.

[C]

Sorry, wrong room, I'm in the wrong place.

[A]

And only one guy in the classroom's laughing. And it's him as I leave. And then two hours later, I'm in my science class or whatever, and midway through the door opens and I hear, yeah, well, tell him it was Moses Malone and oh, I'm sorry, wrong class. And it's him barging into my class and I'm the only one in there laughing. That's what we would do. That's what occupied our day.

[B]

And that's such. Isn't that pretty low end comedy?

[D]

Sure.

[C]

But it's bonding, comedy. It's like you're learning your comedic chops.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

This is also how we would get in the way of each other learning at college.

[B]

It's terrible.

[A]

So let's say I had a really big test on a Wednesday. So Tuesday I would go to the library to study because you couldn't study in the dorm. So I'd go to the main library in North Texas, and I'd have to inform him that I was going to the library. And he said, okay, if I find you, you have to stop studying and we're going to go to Mr. Gaddy's and eat buffet pizza. And I'm like, okay, that sounds fair.

[B]

It's like 399. Why would you pass that up on a Wednesday night?

[A]

So I would find some little alcove in the sixth floor of the library. I'm thinking, I'm hidden pretty well. I'm studying. And then all of a sudden I would hear, well, what do we have here? And I'd turn around and it's him. And I just close my book and get up and we'd go to Mr. Gaddy's. So then a couple weeks later, it's his turn for a big test and I have to go find him.

[B]

And I begged him. I said, please, you and Skip don't try to find me. I am failing this class. It's not even close. I've got got to pass this test or I'm gonna have to. I think it's too late to drop it, so just leave me alone. Just for one night. Economics.

[A]

Skip was our other roommate with. Eventually it was George and Skip and Grizzly in one room.

[C]

Not Skip Bayless.

[A]

No. And I was across the hall with Slaw in the other room.

[C]

What's his real. He's got a real name.

[A]

John Colson, but we called him. So we said, okay, George, go study. Well, of course we're going to come find him. We found him in the darkest part of the library where he couldn't even read. There was no light to read.

[B]

He thought they would give up on me. Well, he's not here.

[C]

He just had a Bic lighter that he was holding down to the text.

[A]

He could not have possibly been studying because he couldn't read in that pitch dark corner he was in. But we found him and we all went to Mr. Gaddy's and had pizza.

[B]

And I'll never forget Craig. Well, you won't be needing this. As he shuts my economics book, I got a test. Okay, you found Me. So, you know, I guess we have to go eat pizza.

[A]

And our GPAs reflected that when you.

[C]

Guys started to work together. And of course we weren't mornings yet, the three of us weren't together. And you start working on the ticket. Do you remember that first day when y' all are sitting across from each other doing a talk show in a way that you'd never done before? This isn't student radio. This is major market.

[B]

It may have sounded like it that.

[C]

First couple of years, your names on the show and now you have a show to fill three hours.

[B]

Yeah. And I think that was going back to our relationship. I felt good about it because I was with Craig. You know, I thought, hey, I'm just hanging out with Craig. I can do that. I have no idea what we're going to talk about. But, you know, we both followed all the local teams. We knew something about it, we had something to say about it. And then we also had some goofy things to say too. And off it went.

[A]

Yeah. And George had the idea very early to work in drops. I think that was your original idea and the first show to work in a drop because George had that idea. And so we had these other element, elemental ideas that we wanted to work in the show. And George looked at me and goes, man, this is gonna work. This is gonna be great.

[B]

Yeah, I had that feeling and that was really fun. I don't know what we just did or what we accomplished. Kind of like we're wasting time again in colle. That felt really good.

[D]

Over the course of three of the episodes, each of the guys took a turn delving into their passions. Here Craig tells a remarkable story of when he was 14 and with his parents permission, rode his bike on a two day cross state journey. From episode nine, Feels like flying and.

[A]

Another moment where the bite gave me confidence. And it's unthinkable today, But I am 14 years old. This is, I think it was 1980 somewhere in there. And we have kinfolk in Shamrock, Texas. My dad's brother, my uncle John and his family were in Shamrock, right across the border from Oklahoma. And I'd been riding my bike a lot. I'd done this 100 mile ride and my cousin Pam was getting married and this happened in April. And my dad, like back in February or March of that year goes, you ought to ride your bike to cousin Pam's wedding. Because he knew I liked riding distances. Now I'm 14 and he's encouraging me. And my mom was half on board with this. He said, you can Take two days off school. She's getting married on Saturday. Go ride Thursday. We'll get you a hotel room halfway. And then ride the rest of it Friday. Because it was 180 miles.

[B]

Whoa.

[A]

And I thought, hell yeah, I'd love to do that. That is the ultimate in freedom.

[B]

Miniature Tour de France here.

[A]

Yeah, it's a miniature tour.

[C]

And you're taking what kind of roads?

[A]

So they were side highways that today would probably be really busy. But back then, you know, I had to zigzag to get my way out of the metro area. And I remember riding by Yukon, I think it was the high school Yukon. And all the kids were going to school. And I was off that day. And then it took me 30 minutes or an hour to get out of Oklahoma City. And then it's side highways straight across to Shamrock.

[C]

Do you ride in the lane or on the shoulder or what are you doing at that point?

[A]

If there was a shoulder, I was on the shoulder. But again, I had a helmet. I had my decent bike. I had a little bag on the front with a change of clothes and toothbrush or something in there. And I had a water bottle. And that was about it. And my parents just said goodbye. Can you imagine parents doing that today? No.

[C]

14.

[A]

So I get out there and it's April, so it's getting kind of warm. I remember going through Bangor, Oklahoma, and going in and having lunch there. And again, the only thing I ate back then was French fries.

[C]

Yeah, French fries and a Coke.

[A]

I think that was my lunch. And I remember the guy, I sat at a bar, at a diner and the guy asked me, what are you doing? Where are you from? I said, oklahoma City.

[C]

Look pretty in that outfit.

[A]

And he goes, well, I'm glad you came through Binger, Oklahoma. This is the home of Johnny Bench. Oh, yeah, that's right, the legendary Reds catcher. So I get back on my bike. I finish that day about 10 miles shy of my destination, which was some little town, I can't remember the name of it. Halfway between Oklahoma City and Shamrock. And I couldn't go any further. I was out of water, I was exhausted. I'd done 90 of the hundred miles and I had to hitchhike. So I'm a 14 year old now.

[B]

We got more danger going here. We got to hitchhiking.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

And so, wow, the french fries didn't carry you the whole way.

[A]

Right?

[C]

That great sports nutrition.

[A]

I stick my thumb out and after a while this pickup truck pulls over. It's some 70s looking guy with long hair and a Beard. And I said, I'm going to whatever the town was. He goes, okay, it's just 10 miles away. Throw your bike in the back. So I put my bike in the back, I get in the cab with him, and he's nice. We're having a decent conversation. But when we get into that little town, there's this woman walking on the sidewalk. As I remember, she had maybe tight jeans on or something. And he looks at her and then he hits me on the shoulder and goes, take a look at that. That'll make a man drive straight up a telephone pole.

[B]

Won't.

[C]

Was such an odd comment. You remember it to this day?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I didn't know how to react. I'm 14. I just kind of went, yeah, yeah, you know, it sure will.

[C]

You don't mind if I open my pants, do you, sir?

[B]

I like them Cyclops shorts you got on.

[C]

She's almost as pretty as you.

[A]

So, yeah, he had his way with me and.

[C]

Okay, well, come on.

[A]

No, he was after. Other than that comment, he was very nice and normal. And I guess that comment's not abnormal for a grown man.

[C]

Do you still keep in contact with him?

[B]

We do.

[A]

We do. I get a Christmas card from him every year.

[C]

Is that guy still alive? How old was he then? Like in his 20s?

[A]

Yeah, I would say he's maybe 30.

[C]

So he's still alive? Probably. Gosh, I wonder if he remembers that. Yeah, I remember I picked up this 14 year old who was hitchhiking with a bike. And I remember I just said something really stupid to him. It was so dumb that I remember it to this day.

[A]

I wonder if he remembers.

[B]

Probably not.

[C]

There's no way he remembers it. But I remember I said drive up a telephone pole. It didn't make sense. I don't know.

[B]

The kids seem to have a lot of promises. And a talk show host.

[C]

He did. And he was wearing a gold freshman medal around his neck.

[B]

Still had the medal on.

[A]

He had a picture of Barry Switzer.

[B]

In his wallet and Rick Honeycutt talking.

[C]

About starting a podcast.

[A]

It's just weird.

[B]

Weird incident.

[A]

He dropped me at the hotel. My dad had called and made a reservation for me and paid for it over the phone. You could do that, you know.

[B]

Did that take some convincing to the manager of the. Of the motel or hotel?

[C]

No, because the dad was on the phone, so it's authorized.

[B]

Okay. All right.

[C]

There's no check on whether this is actually his dad. It's just. Oh, okay, well, right.

[A]

So I remember sleeping pretty hard that night. I ate breakfast at the hotel restaurant and I got up and I did the next 80 miles. The next day. It was a real struggle. It was hot again. But I made it to Shamrock. And then of course, we had the family weekend and my cousin got married. And then on that Sunday, we put the bike in the trunk and drove back to Oklahoma City.

[C]

So I'm assuming your parents brought you some wedding clothes.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You weren't there in the recycling.

[A]

Get out. Right.

[C]

Smelling like a yeti's ass.

[A]

I think my family thought I was nuts for doing that. All my uncles and aunts and cousins. But I always look back at that and my parents believing in me that I could do something like that. That was one of those benchmark moments again in my life. And it was because of the bicycle that gave me such confidence. It was the biggest confidence builder and anything my parents ever did for me to think that much of me that, yeah, he's 14, but he can handle this. And I handled it. And it's like that. I felt like I grew up 10 years in those two days.

[D]

When we come back, four of the best stories told so far on the podcast, including what many have told us is the series best moment yet.

[C]

This episode is brought to you by State Farm.

[A]

Listening to this podcast Smart move. Being financially savvy.

[B]

Smart move. Another smart move, having State Farm help you create a competitive price when you choose to bundle home and auto bundling.

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[D]

Welcome back. Now, early in the series, each host took a turn interviewing the other two about their relationship with each other. When Junior dug into the infamous 30 year back and forth between George and Gordo, out came this magical revelation of a story never before told. From episode four, the Question.

[A]

But I have to start this episode with the question that over the years, without a doubt has been asked me the most by people who listen to our radio show. And that is does George really hate Gordon that much?

[C]

So it's not even a question of does George really hate Gordon? It's just does he hate him that much?

[B]

My answer to that has always been sometimes. Sometimes I really am mad at him. A lot of it is radio, theater, our back and forth. But sometimes I really do disagree with whatever's coming out of his mouth hole. But yeah, no, I don't hate him. Of course we love each other, but we've had our challenges through the years. I think that's safe.

[C]

This is all news to me. I don't know. Yes. So is the question also posed to me, does George really hate me that much?

[A]

Sure, you can jump in on this. I never get it the other way. I never get does Gordon hate George that much?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

By the end of this episode you will see that I don't hate Gordon. But we will. I think this is. I feel, I felt like I was going to be on a couch for this one because early on there was. It was not easy. I will just say that when we started, it really wasn't. I took things. A lot of it was on me taking it way too personally. But yeah, I had to. But I'll explain today. There were several times where you showed me what kind of person you were and that the on air stuff did not stick after that point. But we had to get to that point.

[C]

Yes, we did. And our relationship has certainly changed over the years. Yes, you Know, early on. Yes. You mentioned your. Whatever culpability that you feel on that. And I can't speak to that. I can speak to my culpability, which is. Yeah, I was not sensitive enough to how the other person was feeling about the radio bits or the bit of, you know, ridiculous sitcom type stuff that I'm doing on there, you know, poking the bear.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

As it were. And. And yeah, I did not have enough consideration for human feelings. I think that's what y' all call them on Earth.

[B]

Yeah, something like that. Maybe we should start when I realized you really are a good person. Should we. Should we do that? And then we'll work backwards.

[C]

This is a few weeks ago. Go ahead, tell the story.

[A]

It's a great story. It was.

[B]

Just took 30 years a few days back. No, I mean early. I was the. I'm an easy target. I understand that for a number of reasons. And like I said, I would take it really personally. And I really. I really did think this in the early days of the Ticket. Gosh, I. I guess Gordon just really doesn't like me or he doesn't. He doesn't like the type of person I am or something. And that's fine. We can still work together and I'll just kind of keep him at arm's length. And that's just who he is. And he likes, you know, cutting people, and that's just the way it goes. But we. One of our early pranks in the Ticket, we used to prank call each other. Some shows would call other shows at our little radio station in Dallas. And one particular host thought it'd be funny to have one of his friends prank call me. And he. It was ridiculous. It was a terrible voice and it didn't fool me. And the first time he called me, I said, hey, I know you're a friend of one of our talk show hosts at the Ticket. I know you're a friend of his. Stop doing whatever this is. Then the next night, it was the phone call and he said all these really strange things just to get my reaction. But then he started getting my, like, my family involved. Like, hey, put your son on the phone. Let me talk to him. And then that, you know, got my defense mechanism. I'm going to just, you know, hung up on him. And I went to our friend and I said, is this you? Because if it's not, I'm going to call the police and have them, you know, trace where this call is coming from. It's starting to creep me out a little bit. No, no, it's not me. We've never talked about this on our radio station. And I. I guess it's okay to talk about it here.

[C]

Hell yeah. We can do whatever we want.

[B]

Do what we want.

[C]

We own this baby.

[B]

And so they broke it to me as we finished our show. And at that time, he was working on a show that was right after ours. And he said, hey, you need to stick around because that was me. It was a friend of mine and we're gonna play. And I just felt so betrayed and furious. And you saw me, Gordon, and how upset I was, and I found out that you went back and erased all of them. And I found that out from our program. We have never talked about this.

[C]

We have not. No, no.

[B]

And our program director told me, I said, I don't ever want any of that played on the air. That's messing with my family. That's crossing the line. And if that's funny, my reaction to being upset that someone may be a threat to my at the time, seven year old son, that I don't want to work here anymore. I mean, I was ready to just leave. And he said, it's not going to happen. You should know this, that Gordon went in the production room and he raced all of it. So that was the moment that I knew, okay, Gordon's on my side. It's. Don't take it personally. We're joking around when we're on the air. And I saw you in a totally different light after that.

[C]

Man, I never knew that you found out about that. That I.

[B]

We've never talked about it. I'm terrible about talking about things. I just kind of let things go. And I think guys in general are guilty of that. And we've never talked about that.

[A]

And how long ago was that?

[B]

Oh, about 30 years.

[A]

Yeah, it was like first couple years at the station.

[B]

Yeah, I think we were doing mornings, so it was somewhere around 1996 or 97.

[C]

Yeah, we were already on air partners at that time. Yeah. I mean, look, prank calls can be great. Funny, we've all done them. But you don't. The way that they were doing that prank call, it made no sense to me. First of all, it was like, so this character is just designed to creep Georgie out by calling him in the middle of the night and talking about his family. That's not cool. And it's not okay. And George is really affected by this as he rightly should be. And that audio deserves no place in this world.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I don't even want it out there for. Even if they just said, okay, fine, we won't play it on the air. I don't want that stuff being out there that you have to worry about when that shoe is going to drop, when that's going to get out.

[B]

I was so upset that day. I just left and I came back and apologized to you guys. And this is before I knew that you had erased everything you said. You don't have to worry about it. You don't have to worry about that audio. And you're a good man. Wow, that's like one of the nicest things anyone's ever said to me after something like that. So, yeah, after that moment, I knew, you know, Gordon is a good dude. He really is.

[C]

Well, you are a good man, Giorgio.

[B]

No, I don't know.

[C]

You are a good man. And I think that those two words or three words. Do you want to include the article? I think those are the most important words that a guy can ever hear for whatever reason. To me, when someone says, you're a good man.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

That hits me in the heart more than any other phrase ever. Yeah, that's much better than someone telling you that you're a great man.

[A]

Yes.

[D]

When George took his turn asking questions, we got this great story from Junior and Gordo about a night out on the town from episode three, Unlimited free beer.

[A]

I wanted to tell the story of the other road trip we took because this is as crazy as the Colorado road trip Cowboys training camp. We're all down there. Everybody left for a weekend, but the ticket was staying down there for two or three weeks. Gordo and I didn't have any reason to come back to Dallas because we didn't have families, you know, all you guys who were back to the compound.

[C]

Families that wanted us. Yeah.

[A]

So we thought, well, and we'd been in Austin for a while, let's do something fun. Do you want a road trip down to the beach to go to Port Aransas? So, same thing. He packs a grocery sack with a couple clothing. We didn't have even swimsuits. We just had shorts and T shirts. We drive down there, we find someplace to stay. I remember it being a pretty beaten down condo. It wasn't very nice.

[C]

Horrible place.

[B]

And we weren't making much money at the time.

[C]

No, no.

[B]

Gordos especially wasn't making much money.

[C]

You don't have to point that out.

[B]

Sorry, I'm sor.

[C]

I struggled.

[A]

What was your salary the first year of the ticket? $8,000.

[C]

The first year of the ticket. I looked up recently, fairly recently, and yeah, it was like I made $7,000.

[A]

We weren't making much more than that.

[B]

Plus free T shirts and some free CDs.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Including one CD.

[A]

So we had a really beaten down weekend. Two nights, I think, in Port Aransas. Maybe even one night. I remember being down at Fisherman's Wharf, looking at a dead fish floating in the water.

[C]

Floating there. And I just remember thinking, my life just can't get any lower. Me and that fish down there. About the same.

[B]

About the same.

[A]

And then one of our nights down there, we went out drinking.

[C]

Oh, Lord.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[C]

Was that a. Like a disco or dance club or something?

[A]

Some kind of a dance club.

[C]

A Port Aransas dance club.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

And there was. There were a couple girls there, and we were trying to dance with them and drink beers with them and all of that. And somehow we end up taking this one girl, giving her a ride back to her place.

[B]

Was Gordo doing his funny dances?

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

Oh, yeah. I don't know how to real dance, joke dance. So I can only joke dance.

[A]

But he left.

[C]

Junior will real dance. You know, Junior will actually dance.

[A]

Yeah. I'm terrible at it, though, so I can't even do that. But I remember at one point, there's.

[C]

No disagreement with me on that.

[A]

I'm talking up this girl, and he comes to me and says, can I have the keys to your car? I said, yeah. And he took the keys, went out and just reclined the seat and said he had the Honda spin.

[C]

I did. I looked up at that sunroof and just watched it spin for about an hour. It was horrible, man.

[B]

You and that fish were at about the same spot.

[C]

I know. And we're down there. We're in a place that's just so gross. And we just smell like ocean, you know, we just smell like harbor, you know, it's just. Oh, so gross. And so, yeah, I'm sitting out in that in the car, and you came, you showed up with that girl. All of a sudden, he comes back to the car and he's got a girl. And I'm like, what's going on here? And that's when he's like, oh, we gotta give her a ride home. And we used to do this gag that. You guys probably used to do this too, of when you have someone who doesn't know you. You guys, you each try to introduce biographical facts about the other one that are untrue that the other guy then has to respond to. So somehow we get into this.

[B]

That.

[C]

And once again, different time and place. Very different time, but that I was extremely gay. He starts in with extremely, yeah, this is my gay friend Gordon. And I'm in the backseat and there she's in the passenger seat. He's driving. And this is my gay friend Gordon and everything. And she was like, really fascinated by this, that I was this gay guy.

[B]

Yeah, you're safe.

[C]

And she's like, wow, so. And you know how.

[B]

And once again, just different divider.

[C]

We're in such a safe podcast space here. And she's like, when did you know that you were gay? You know, I think I knew it at birth. And I'm having to play along with these because he's introduced this fact about it. And she goes, so you've never been attracted to a girl at all? And I said, no, never been attracted to a girl until now. So horrible.

[A]

But we ended up just taking her home and dropping her off. And so that next day was Sunday and we had to leave, we had to drive back. And I said, why don't we go back through San Antonio and stop and see our buddy Don, our old college buddy from North Texas. And we're sitting in his little sports department with him and he's showing us some video of a funny play or something like that. And Gordon and I are sitting there and he stops the recording and he looks at us and he goes, God, you guys stink.

[B]

You didn't shower the whole time.

[C]

I know.

[A]

We hadn't had a shower the whole weekend.

[C]

We had been partying, being non stop.

[D]

The guys spent an episode talking about the hardest things they've ever done in their lives. And from that, this story of Craig getting up the courage to ask out the hottest girl in College from episode 24, how to Eat a Mountain.

[A]

When we thought about doing this topic, the hardest things we've ever done. It was the time that I asked out a girl, and this is in college, and I asked out a girl that I didn't think I had any shot at and it turned out I didn't. But I have never been more, in my own way, more consumed with getting something done than when I decided to ask this girl out. And we had a class together and she was probably the most beautiful girl in our school. Her name was Grace. You know her? Remember Grace? Every guy loved Grace. She was just gorgeous and she was cool. And we sat next to each other in this class. And I decided early that semester I was going to ask her out. I am going to ask her out.

[C]

Goals.

[A]

So I set up a way to do it. Okay, I'll walk out with her, and then we'll be over here. And every plan I had was visualizing. Yes, I was visualizing.

[C]

Here we go.

[A]

Every plan I had went up in smoke. Somebody, you know, interrupted us or she went, took a left when I took a right or whatever it was. And. But I was so obsessed with asking her out, and I just, I had put it on my bucket list. I am going to do this. And so one day I went to that class and I said, I don't care who gets in my way. I don't care what she does. I am not going home without asking her out today. This had been like a two month deal, so I didn't pay attention to anything in class. I'm scared to death to ask her to go on a date. But I get my courage up and the class ends and I walk out with her and I'm making small talk with her and our friend, Mr. Cheese.

[B]

Oh, thanks, Mr. Cheese.

[A]

Meyer was walking with us, so it was the three of us. And he.

[C]

Was he part of the plan?

[B]

No, he played for the Hoopers.

[A]

But the plan was she and I walking out together. And not a third. But I had made up my mind.

[C]

That that was going to be the day.

[A]

That was the day. And I didn't care if there were 50 people listening.

[C]

Why are you doing. See, you should have had contingency plans for change in battlefield conditions.

[A]

I had done that for two months and it never worked out tomorrow. So I am shaking. I am so scared to death, and I'm wishing Mr. Cheese would peel off. And he never did. He's just walking with us.

[C]

Shake voice that day. Oh, my God.

[A]

Shake voice and now I see.

[C]

What are you doing today?

[A]

We're at the end of the sidewalk where I know she always goes left. And so we're.

[B]

We're gonna.

[A]

About to split up. And so I just did it. And I said, I. I don't care if Mr. Cheese hears this. And so, so I just, I can't listen to this.

[B]

We're.

[A]

We're making small talk, and I just finally interrupted, probably somebody or something she was saying. I said, hey, I've been wondering, would you like to go out and have dinner with me sometime? And as soon as I said that, and as soon as I said that, Mr. Cheese exited stage right. He realized he was cringing. He was cringing. He was in an awkward moment. And he just took off to the right. And so there I'm left with her. And she stopped and she looked at me and she said, you do know I have a boyfriend. And I said, yeah, I don't care. It doesn't matter to me. Do you still want to go out?

[C]

Gosh.

[A]

And I don't think I knew she had a boyfriend or I was fuzzy on that.

[C]

And she said, bro, coat, man.

[A]

She said, okay, I'll have lunch with you. And I said, okay, I'll call you. And she gave me her number and I went home. And the day later I called her. And then like a few days later, I took her out to lunch to Guadalajara's in Denton.

[B]

Quality Place.

[A]

Terrible place to take a date.

[C]

Why is she going out with another guy if she's. Well, why is she going out with you when she's got a boyfriend?

[A]

Maybe she fell under the spell of one Craig Miller and she just could not resist. But I actually took her out, picked her up, dropped her off. Obviously we didn't kiss or anything like that, but that was probably.

[C]

Did you rent a car to pick her up in or did you go.

[A]

I picked her up in my beaten down Monte Carlo. He had a decent car.

[C]

Monte Carlo?

[B]

Yeah, it was pretty cool.

[A]

It was okay.

[B]

It was all right.

[A]

I was keeping two tires afloat with fix a flat, so it was not doing all that well. But. But I. And I knew we would never go out again when I took her back to the apartment and. But still, I asked out the prettiest girl at school. And she said yes.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Why did.

[C]

Why did it not go well at the lunch? Like, what happened at the lunch?

[A]

It went fine. It went fine, but I knew we would never be a thing because she had a boyfriend.

[C]

Okay. You couldn't just be her lunch boyfriend and he's the dinner boyfriend?

[A]

No, I just assumed that we were done at that point and I never asked her out again. And I think she kind of made it clear that she had a boyfriend and wasn't going to date anybody and.

[B]

But that gave you the bravery to ask out somebody else.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Speaking of the hardest things you've ever done, imagine being Gordon's dad, especially if you're a Baptist minister. From Episode seven Ode to Our Parents.

[C]

I remember finding in my dad's sock drawer this coin. And on one side of the coin there was a woman, a topless woman, an engraving, you know, like a coin impression of a topless woman. And on the bottom, it was the naked rear end of a woman. And I thought this was the most magical thing I'd ever seen in my life. Now, why a Baptist minister had this, I had no idea. But I thought this was Incredible. This is how hard up we were for seeing a naked woman when I was growing up. Is that even just a stamped coin would be something you needed to show your friends? So I took it to school to show my friends. Hey, look at this. This is what women's breasts look like.

[B]

Look at that.

[C]

If you can see on this monochrome woman, that's stamped into copper. Look at this. And look, she's got a bottom. She's got a bottom.

[A]

Would that do it for today's Internet porn generation?

[C]

So my teacher at the time, she sees us back there causing a commotion in class. What's going on back there? What do you have? And I had to take this coin up to her, and I had it. And I. I have to explain to her. I'm sorry. I found this in my dad. And this is my dad. He's a Baptist preacher. So what is he doing with this thing? And I'm telling the teacher, I found it in my dad's sock drawer.

[A]

Throwing him under the bus.

[C]

Yeah, throwing him under the bus. And so she called my parents. I got in trouble because I'm disrupting class, showing them nudity. Although this is like practically Roman fresco at Pompeii type nudity. And so my parents, you know, they get me and I'm in trouble and everything. And I. I got in trouble for that. And I got to talking to the story behind the coin. You know, my dad, I remember him laughing at it. My mom was mortified. She always felt the family humiliations much more than my father. Any sort of perceived loss of face or stature would affect her a lot more than death. But I remember my dad laughing. And he told the story of how he came to get that coin. He said that it was. They received it in the offering plate. It was some dude who had it as his, you know, settle a bet coin, flip coin. That's a funny thing that they would give away back in the day, you know, that heads or tails is what it was, the heads or tails coin. And some dude had emptied his change into the offering plate. And they had. The woman who did the counting and gathering of the money and sorting of the money at the church had called my dad and said, hey, we got this in the offering plate. And my dad thought it was so funny, kept the thing and said, okay, that's okay. I'll take it. And he put a quarter in there and took that coin and then. And took it, and he just never got rid of it. Just had it. That was it.

[A]

How funny.

[C]

But I found it and Took it to school and got in trouble for it.

[D]

When we come back, Junior cheating death. Jeb's busted bed, and, yes, Gordon's bathtub.

[A]

Next role with Vernon Davis. The transformative journeys of athletes, artists, and entrepreneurs.

[C]

We have very special guests.

[A]

Ladies and gentlemen, Devon Franklin. Whether it's the movies I'm doing, whether.

[C]

It'S TV shows, I just tap into the truth.

[A]

That's what I bring to everybody.

[C]

Project. Ladies and gentlemen, Isaac Keys.

[A]

People always ask, how did you make it to the NFL?

[C]

How did you get into acting? There's a story behind all of that.

[A]

It's about whether you're willing to tell your story or not. Next roll isn't about what's next. It's about why they do it. Next roll with Vernon Davis. Follow and listen on your favorite platform.

[D]

We're back with something from the episode that probably got the most listener response, and that's the guys discussing procrastination from episode 17. Riding it out.

[A]

So it is a human thing, because aren't we wired to take the path of least resistance?

[C]

Yes.

[A]

And whenever we encounter something in our daily lives, which is a million things a day, we just most often choose to take the path of least resistance, which is not fixing that thing that we're riding out.

[C]

All right, I got one for you. So for the past two years, I've had a couple leaking faucets. And this is not just leaking as in drip, drip. It's like it's a steady stream of water, and I can't cut it off.

[B]

Now you're part of the water problem in Texas?

[C]

I am. I am. I hired a company to come out one time a couple years ago when I was going to solve this thing, and they said, you want us to tear out the wall and put it in whole new shower tree, one of these faucets, Shower head. And I said, nah, don't do that. I said, okay, well, we can do a stem replacement in there. It sometimes works. Sometimes does. And it's kind of expensive. It's like $500.

[B]

Oh, my.

[C]

But I was tackling the problem then because I'd written it out like a year before then. So they fixed it, and about, I'd say, two weeks later, it started again. So I got to tear out the wall and just replace all the works. It's been two years now. It's not just the sound of it, and it's not just when you open that bathroom door. It's like a orchid hot house in there. It's so humid, and you could be doing Growing pot in there. It's ridiculous. But it's not just that. It's that I have to turn off the water, hot water, because it's the hot water side. Or it'll have the water heater running constantly. So before every shower and before every time I need hot water, I've got to go to the closet that has the water heater, turn on the hot water, use it, and then go back and then turn it off after I've taken the shower, bath or wash my hands or whatever. So everything.

[B]

If you have the wall knocked out, you could probably do it yourself.

[C]

It's been two years that I have to turn on and off the water anytime I want to use it. The hot water at the water heater, boy.

[B]

And doesn't it make it. Maybe it makes it better and you eventually do it. Or does it make it worse when you have someone else in your house saying, when are we going to get that fixed? I'm on it.

[C]

I'm on it.

[B]

I'm on it. Next week. I got some time next week we're going to fix it.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Promise. Okay. This is really embarrassing because you guys have made fun of our hospital bed, as you call it.

[C]

George sleeps in a hospital bed.

[B]

It's not a hospital bed, but with.

[C]

Your prostate issues, I think you don't have prostate issues.

[B]

The bed adjusts.

[A]

You have an IV tree next to it.

[B]

No, I don't have an IV tree, but you can raise your head, you can raise your feet, and this particular bed has air pressure where you can put it on your own number and it's divided in half so I can have my sleep comfort and she can have her sleep comfort.

[A]

Are you doing a lot of sidestepping the name brand here?

[B]

Yeah. Trying to be good about this. Could be a sponsor someday. And I love the bed. It's the greatest bed we've ever had. But I'd say for about six months now. Her side of the bed loses air.

[C]

Pressure throughout the night.

[B]

Yeah. To the point where if I have to get up and go wee, wee, pee, pee, or when I go to work in the morning, I get on the app because we've lost the remote control to. I get on the app on my phone and fill it back up to her number and then I leave for work. Or I'll whisper her to whisper to her, hey, why don't you sleep on my side and just, you know, not worry about it? And we've tried to fix it twice. They don't have people that come out to your house and fix it. You have to do.

[C]

It's take it in.

[B]

No, you have to do phone support, tech support. And I'm. I'm just saying. I'm not saying, but I'm saying I can't understand them.

[C]

Them?

[B]

Yes. Technician.

[C]

Who is them?

[B]

The technician. We have a language barrier.

[A]

All of them?

[B]

All of them. We've tried it like two or three different times, and every time I find that part they're talking about, and then I can't understand what they want me to do. Don't we have a technician that can just come out here? I don't know how to fix things.

[C]

But I don't understand why is there a language barrier? I bet you their name is, like, Cody or Justin or something.

[B]

That's what they say their name is. Yes.

[A]

It's clearly not Justin.

[B]

I have a hard time understanding him to the point where. Where I've just hung up and said, okay, look, I'll just get to it, okay?

[C]

Just go out and get, like, a bicycle tube repair kit and patch the bed.

[A]

I'll come over. I can do that.

[C]

Yeah, he can patch an inner tube.

[B]

All right. Do most people call this procrastination?

[C]

Yes.

[D]

Yeah, Certainly everybody at least once in their life has thought they'd almost met their maker. And so have the guys. They spent an episode describing moments they thought they had met the their end. And Junior tells this harrowing story from episode 16, Cheating Death.

[A]

So I believe this was 1999.

[C]

Ah, yes.

[A]

And at our radio station, we had something called a ticket flyaway, a cowboys flyaway, where each week we would pick several listeners to go with us on a flight to a Cowboys road game, if there was a road game that week. So we did eight of these a year. And the show hosts would take turns hosting the flight. Well, my turn came up that fall. I was going to host the flight to Indianapolis to see the Cowboys and Colts.

[C]

This is where you serve the drinks and peanuts and things like that.

[A]

So it's me. And I took my girlfriend at the time. Her name was Rhonda. This was also, keep in mind, just a couple of months, I believe, after Payne Stewart died in the plane crash where he was cruising at altitude at 35,000ft in a private jet, and they lost cabin pressure, and everybody in the cabin was knocked out. And the jet just eventually crashed in South Dakota or somewhere.

[C]

They'd, like, track that plane for four hours as it was a ghost plane in the sky flown by no one.

[B]

Okay, so we're on.

[A]

We're on a private jet for this flight, and it's a six seater. And me and Rhonda have our backs to the cockpit and we're facing the four listeners in the four seats facing us, two pilots, pilot and co pilot behind us. So we're flying along, we're all having a good time. And then we start our descent. We're getting close to Indianapolis. And then not long after we start our descent, something weird starts to happen. And I can hear a commotion in the cockpit. And I turn around and I see a red light flashing. We heard a big pop in the, in the cabin.

[B]

Gosh.

[A]

And then.

[C]

Hey, guys.

[A]

Didn't really know what it was.

[B]

Hey, big pump.

[C]

You got a chair? Big enough for me.

[B]

Hang on a second. Craig's telling the story.

[A]

Like a loud pop. And I turn around and I hear this commotion. I see a red light on the dash. And I said, is everything okay? And I could only see the co pilot. I couldn't see the pilot from my seat. And he said, yeah, everything's fine. So I turned back around. Seconds later, the oxygen masks deploy from above. Now I'm thinking something's not fine. I turn around, I said, are you sure everything's okay? And he goes, everybody put your masks on. So everybody starts putting quit questions. I struggle to get my mask on, and Rhonda, who had worked for American Airlines, comes over to me, pulls it down, puts it on properly. I'm like a three year old. I can't get my mask on backward.

[C]

Spilled your crayon box, all that, trying to get your mask on.

[A]

And then as we all get our masks on, the plane goes into a nose dive. I mean, straight down nose dive. And we were probably, I think I was told we were at around 25,000ft and we did a dive to 10,000ft. So that's a 15,000 foot dive. And that took a couple of minutes, as I recall. And this is where what happened? Or you were talking about Gordo. That peace washed over me and all I could think of. I wasn't scared. We were all convinced that we were crashing. And it didn't bother me. I just remember I kept thinking, wow, all these years I've watched news stories about plane crashes and movies about plane crashes, and I can't believe I'm going to die in a plane crash. This is really crazy.

[C]

Almost as a little bit of a curiosity.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

It's your thought, huh? That's odd.

[B]

Was anyone else in the plane freaking out, like yelling or crying or anything?

[A]

No.

[C]

In fact, confessing to weird stuff.

[B]

I didn't Mean to do it.

[C]

I'm wearing panties right now.

[A]

Oh, God. So fast forward a few days. We're back in Dallas at work at the radio station, and our show is over one morning, and I walk out of the studio, and I go through the. The main entrance, the lobby of our building, and there are two men there in suits, and they say they need to talk to me. So we go into a small room, and they're from the faa, and they wanted to interview me about the incident.

[C]

Did they cuff you or did they take them off for the interview?

[A]

They didn't cuff me. They did a cavity search, but they didn't cuff me. Then they start asking me questions, this and that, and yeah, I heard a loud pop. And then we went into a nosedive. I said, so what exactly happened? And they said, well, you all had been cruising at 35,000. You had started your descent. So around 28,000 or 27,000, your cabin seal around the door. The seal around the door broke, and your cabin lost pressure and was losing pressure very, very quickly. And he said, that's why the pilot did the right thing. He dove down to where you could breathe. Okay. Wow. And I said, but we could have. We would have been fine anyway because we had oxygen masks. And they both got real uncomfortable and looked at each other. And I said, right. And they said, have you ever heard of a placebo, Mr. Miller? And I said, yes. And they said, that's basically what an oxygen mask is. Over 30,000ft.

[B]

You have no chance.

[A]

You have no chance.

[C]

Really? I don't know about that.

[A]

That's what they said.

[C]

I think he was just trying to scare you.

[A]

Well, he did. And so basically he told me, if you had not already been starting your descent, you all would have been dead, just like Payne Stewart. That would have been me.

[C]

That would have been you. You would have been that good at golf right before death?

[D]

Gordon is a famously quirky fellow, and here he admits his obsessions with collecting unusual things. And in particular, particular, yes, his fascination of a moment in American history from episode 10, the Assassin's Bathtub.

[B]

How many typewriters do you own?

[C]

Let's not podcast anymore right now, but just guesstimate. It's probably around 200.

[A]

Wow. Really?

[B]

Okay. Yeah, that's about what I thought it was.

[A]

Where are they all?

[C]

They're all at my parents house. I still have my parents house. They've passed on now, but. And my mom. I keep imagining that the only way that I can get her to live again is to make her rise from the grave with how much I've junked up her house. She'd be so pissed.

[A]

Just stacks of typewriters, 200 typewriters. Do you ever go over there and bang away on them?

[C]

Every once in a while I'll go back through them. The thing about the things that I'm interested in is I'll get to a point where I think I'm not interested in it anymore, and it always comes back again. If I wait a few years and don't get rid of those objects, I will always get reinterested in them and have to reacquire them if I've gotten rid of them. So I've now learned to be a little bit more cautious with thinking a phase is over with me, because the same things that I'm interested in, I get reinterested in again and again and again. Typewriters, pens, mechanical pencils. You're starting to see a theme here. I like things that are associated in the accoutrement of writing books. I have so many books.

[A]

I have guitars.

[C]

Guitars, yes. I have way too many guitars.

[B]

How many guitars are we standing at right now?

[C]

Once again, I think the podcast needs to stop right now and move forward. I don't know. It's probably 100. 100 between acoustics, bases, electrics.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Where are they stored?

[C]

Once again, my mother's going to come back for the grave on this one.

[B]

Guitars everywhere.

[C]

There is one particular thing you mentioned earlier in the podcast.

[A]

Yep.

[B]

Bathtub.

[C]

That's. It's very sensitive. It's very sensitive. I have been accused by members of the public of being, quote, unquote, obsessed.

[B]

With Lee Harvey Oswald. It's like anything else. It was a fascinating story, and you dug into it, and now you know every address where he lived here in the Dallas Fort Worth area.

[C]

Now, like Junior said, I'm not really obsessed with history. And that's true. Once again, combining passions and interest, I got interested. Where were the places he lived? Not just where did this event happen, but where was he? Where were the humble little hovels that his mind was churning in that led to the world changing? I don't know what you're talking about. 602 Elspeth. 214 Musanili. Actually, it's maybe North Neely. I can't remember. 1026 North Beckley. That's the one that was the rooming house. So going to all those and then walking through those. And what's so interesting about walking through those is sometimes you're walking through a place that's still an Apartment building people still live in. And you're seeing this mixture of life is going on now without a thought of what happened back then. These people are in lower income housing in a depressed area. They're just trying to make it day to day. They're not at all concerned or even aware of the historical significance of the apartment that their kids are tearing through right now. They're living life because life goes on. That's what happens to life. It's the great tragedy and hope of our human existence. It's the tragedy of the person who means the most to you in the world dies. And the insult that the world would go on after that.

[A]

It's such a.

[C]

It's so insulting. But yet it's also the greatest gift ever that life goes on after you lose a leader, a beloved leader or a beloved spouse or your brother George, you know, like you just couldn't imagine life beyond him, but yet there is life beyond him.

[B]

Yeah, it's a long way to say that you saw a bathtub and you went, wow, Lee Harvey Oswald used to bathe in that.

[C]

I want that. So yeah, for those that don't know, I did end up buying Lee Harvey Oswald's old bathtub from one of his apartment buildings they were tearing down.

[B]

And as much as we all give you a hard time about that, if you had not done that, that bathtub would be in some landfill.

[C]

It would be in a landfill, yes. And, and I think I can't remember what I paid the woman for it. It was like about to be torn out and thrown away. So I think I probably paid her 100 or $200 for the bathtub, the bathroom doors, the little drawer that his daughter used to sleep in, that they used to use as a bassinet, him and Marina, all that stuff was very cheap. And her little vanity, the built in vanity that Marina used to.

[A]

And is that at your parents house as well?

[C]

Once again.

[A]

Good lord.

[B]

Right next to a mess of guitars and typewriters.

[C]

Assassin's BATHTUB.

[D]

After more than 30 years, it's become pretty clear each of the musers has a role on the show. Junior is the navigator, Gordon is the wild card and George is its heart. We'll finish with this sweet story from episode 12, Music Does Matter.

[C]

The BLUE Ribbon I still have a.

[B]

Passion for sports and there's so many different offshoots from it. My own experience in competing, which did start in swimming, we knew that. And I actually brought in something for show and tell that we can give to Peter to send out.

[C]

He's he's such a former athlete that can't let go of his glory days.

[B]

Well, this was when I was 7 years old and all my brothers and sisters, I'm the youngest of five, they were all swimmers and really good swimmers, really. Four of them, to some degree, swam when they were in college. But they were all in competitive swimming growing up. And I was a little behind because most of them had gone off to college and no one was around to teach me how to swim all the different strokes, backstroke and breaststroke and butterfly and free. And my brother, who was really a good swimmer, Rick, came home one summer and we had a swim club right behind us in Chicago. And he was going to be an assistant coach on the team. And so I wanted to be on the team and I'd go to work out, you know, I wasn't very good, and he didn't have much time to spend with me and. But he taught me how to swim butterflies. With one exception. He didn't teach me how to breathe, to take a breath, to put your head up and then, you know, bring your, your hands over. So it came time for a meet, and I told him, I said, I think I'm ready to swim. He said, you're not ready to swim. I said, no, I think I am. And I said, but I don't want to get disqualified by stepping on the bottom because I don't. I don't think I can make it 25 yards, one lap of the pool without stepping on the bottom. And he said, well, okay, then don't swim. But I want to swim. He said, okay, you're gonna have to figure it out. So I remember standing on the side of the pool getting ready for my race, and I'm one of six swimmers, seven years old. Swimmers, take your mark. And my thought was, I just won't breathe. I'll just do a no breather and just go all the way down. And the story goes that about halfway down I had the lead because I actually had a pretty good butterfly. But then it came to, okay, I've got to take a breath. And I took the most ridiculous porpoise coming up for a desperation breath. Didn't touch the bottom.

[C]

You look like Shamu coming up out of the pool at SeaWorld.

[B]

And apparently, according to my brother, it just took forever for me to get my breath go back in. And then I'm kind of defeated. And I got tangled up in the lane. Flailing, flail and. But I finished and I did not touch the bottom. And my brother grabs me out of the water.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

We did it. You did it. You did it. And he said, we'll work on the breathing thing, you know, and this is so great. I'm so proud of you and all this stuff. And so I thought, you know, it was the best even though I got last place. But the head coach of that team, that night, I was waiting for my brother and the head coach of that team said, hey, come here for a second. And he said, that was really brave what you did tonight. And this is what goes to winners. And it was the. It looks purple now. It's a blue first place ribbon. No tag on the back to say what it was.

[A]

Wow, that used to be blue.

[B]

It was. Yeah, that's how old it is.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

And all my. So after that, I took that as confirmation of I can do this and I ran home, showed my parents and everything, but I didn't show anyone else this ribbon because I didn't win anything. I didn't do anything that was really, you know, significant outside of what it meant to me. And the rest of the time. When I was swimming in the summer, Trident Conference, Fairwind Swim Club, I dominated. I became a good swimmer for, for my age group and especially in the summertime because I really liked swimming for fair wind. But I've hung onto this ribbon all my other first place ribbons and trophies, I threw them away. But I kept that because it really taught me a powerful lesson of, you tried, you stepped out, scared to death. Those, those swim meets, they would have 200 people. It might as well have been 200,000 people.

[A]

They were nationally televised, weren't they?

[B]

You felt like it was. You felt like, oh my God, everybody in the world is watching right now. And finished.

[A]

And that's great that coach did that for you.

[B]

Yeah. And that's saying about, well, you don't give ribbons to everyone. Well, you know what? Maybe sometime you should because here, 50 some odd years later, I still have that as and I've kept it all these times of. Okay, this is going to be tough. You're going to have to work through this. And I've looked down at that ribbon.

[D]

Thanks for listening. Hopefully this will encourage you to go back and pick up episodes you've not yet heard. The guys will be back next week with something new and you can always reach out to them via email. Themuserspodmail.com Happy New Year everybody. We really do appreciate you following subscribing and yes, being a sweet, clean P1 the Musers. The podcast is a tired head production.

[C]

The United States soccer Federation presents the U.S. soccer Podcast. This is the show where we bring.

[D]

You in depth interviews with U.S. soccer stars.

[C]

This time, Sam Coffey. The World cup is in two years. Is it time yet?

[A]

Like, can we get back in into camp?

[B]

Tim ream we're going to continue to show other countries we're not going to be pushed around.

[C]

And Jedi ROBINSON Every time you come back and you put the jersey on.

[B]

It means more and more each time. So we'll be back here with all the best stories.

[C]

The U. S Soccer Podcast.

[B]

We've got a lot to talk about.

[C]

Follow and listen on your favorite platform.