The Parenting Reboot with Deepa

Why the Tech Industry Isn't Solving Real Family Needs — Yet | With Founder & Mom Avni Patel-Thompson

Ever wondered what technology and AI would look like if it were built by a mom? One designed not around engagement metrics, algorithms or ad revenue — but around the actual complications and nuances of family life. The 11pm mental checklist. The 14 school apps. The invisible labour that never makes it onto a CV, but runs the entire household.Avni Patel Thompson, a mom and 3x founder, has spent a decade trying to build that version. And what she’s learned along the way should change how all of us think about technology, parenting, and what we actually need from both.The Village Isn’t Gone. The Mechanism Is.Avni’s work starts with a single insight: modern parents aren’t missing the will to build and participate in community. They’re missing the infrastructure.“The village in the traditional sense is where you grew up and the people you’d known all your life. I was certain those people still exist in our communities. What we’re lacking is the mechanism to know them and trust them — over a shorter period of time.”- AvniThat gap — between the people who exist and the trust that connects them — is what she tried to solve first with Poppy, a vetted caregiver marketplace backed by Y Combinator, and then with Milo, an AI family co-pilot backed by OpenAI.Both were different expressions of the same question: how do we give people the first-principles version of the village?The Real Problem With Family TechHere’s something the industry doesn’t say out loud: most of the tools families use every day were never built for them.“We haven’t looked at homes as their own domain. We use products built for work — to achieve productivity — and plug them into homes where the end objective is completely different. Families don’t live to be productive.”The result? A market full of edtech sold to school boards instead of designed for kids. Productivity apps that treat the family like a project to manage. Platforms that add to the noise instead of filtering it.3 things the parenting-tech world still gets wrong:→ It optimises for the wrong thing. Efficiency and time-on-app are not the same as family wellbeing.→ It ignores who’s actually doing the work. The invisible load — the mental, emotional, logistical labour of running a family — has never been treated as expertise worth building on.→ It doesn’t understand care. AI today is trained on public internet data that barely represents women, let alone mothers. The tacit knowledge of how care actually works has never been encoded.The Question Nobody Is AskingWhat would AI look like if it were trained on care?“What if we got 10,000 mothers globally and had them encode how they think — about dinner, the weekend schedule, a sick neighbour, a child’s hard week? It hasn’t been done before. But why couldn’t it?”That data doesn’t exist because care work has never been treated as expertise worth collecting. Not because it isn’t valuable — because it hasn’t been prioritised.Avni believes it’s trainable. She believes AI can be built to understand not just the task of care, but the second and third-order reasoning behind it. But only if founders are willing to ask harder questions about what they’re actually building — and for whom.What Are Parents For in the Age of AI?It’s the question Avni is sitting with. And her answer is quietly radical.“Presumably, in the not-so-distant future, AI can do the functional work of parents — tutor, coach, cook, coordinate. So humans can just human. My job is to bear witness. To be present. To be imperfect and just try.”Her advice for families navigating right now:→ Be conservative about anything algorithmic and designed for more time-on-app. Strong limits — or not at all.→ Let your kids experiment, build, and ask questions. They’re teaching you more than you’re teaching them.→ Teach them physics, philosophy, and poetry. Three poles far enough apart that they learn to think — not just to optimise.Thanks for listening and reading!📩 Subscribe to this Substack for a new research-backed conversation every other week — no panic, no perfection, just honest takes on raising kids in the age of technology.→ Follow Avni’s Substack Beautiful Chaos and give her a shout!💙 Share this with a parent, educator, or founder who’s asking the same questions. The more people in this conversation, the better. Get full access to The Parenting Reboot with Deepa at deepavd.substack.com/subscribe

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Sexuality, Reproductive Health & Tech: How Do Parents, Kids Learn Today?

4w ago00:35:14Tap to summarize

What happens when the internet becomes your child’s first teacher about sexuality?In this episode of Parenting Reboot, I sit down with Ramya Anand, co-lead at TARSHI, an organization that has spent nearly three decades reshaping how India approaches sexuality education, gender and reproductive health.Her message is simple, but not easy: if parents don’t talk about sexuality, the internet will.And the internet doesn’t always get it right.From unrealistic body standards to misinformation around consent and relationships, young people today are forming their understanding of sexuality in fragmented, often unsafe ways. What they need instead is context, trust, and conversation.We talk about* Why “one big talk” doesn’t work—and what to do instead* How to introduce age-appropriate conversations without awkwardness* The role of consent, agency, and safety in both online and offline spaces* Practical resources for parents navigating these conversations“Sexuality is an intrinsic part of our lives,” Ramya reminds us. Which means silence doesn’t protect our children—preparation does.Digital Safety: Understanding Key ConceptsAs children engage with digital media, parents must educate them on critical concepts related to digital safety, consent, agency, and access.Access: Understanding what content is accessible to them and recognizing safe versus unsafe information.Consent: Teaching children about consent in both online and offline interactions is vital. Encourage discussions about boundaries, respect, and communication.Agency: Empowering children to ask questions and express their feelings about what they encounter online fosters autonomy.Resources for ParentsTo aid in these conversations, resources such as age-appropriate books and guides can be invaluable. For instance, TARSHI has developed a series of colored books that cater to different age groups, helping parents navigate discussions with ease.The Yellow Book: Designed for parents, it offers tools and tips for discussing sexuality with children.The Red (10-14 years) and Blue Books (age 14+): Tailored for older kids and teens, these resources delve deeper into complex topics surrounding sexuality and relationships, providing a framework for parents to support their adolescent children.This episode is not about having all the answers. The digital world is evolving, and so must our approach to discussing sexuality. This isn’t just about biology; it’s about understanding our bodies, relationships, and choices in a nuanced way. It’s about becoming a parent your child can come to with questions.New episodes out, every other Wednesday. Subscribe and share the Parenting Reboot podcast with your loved ones! Get full access to The Parenting Reboot with Deepa at deepavd.substack.com/subscribe

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Raising Calm Kids in Uncertain Times: A Dubai-Mom's Guide to Mindfulness

Apr 1500:25:48Tap to summarize

What if the antidote to your child’s screen meltdown wasn’t another app — but a body-first moment of connection you could share together?That’s the beating heart of Hoopla Fun UAE, the gamified family wellness app founded by Jacqueline Perrottet — a mum of two who struggled with anxiety herself and set out to build something she genuinely needed at home. The result is an app that doesn’t chase engagement through addictive design. It quietly hands it back.In this conversation, Jacqueline walks us through the philosophy behind Hoopla’s Feel it, Move it, Connect approach — and why calming the body first is the fastest path to a calmer mind. “It’s a lot easier to control and calm your body than it is to calm your mind.”-JacquelineWhat makes Hoopla different:* It’s designed for families to use together — not a device you hand a child and walk away from* Sensory, movement-based activities replace passive screen time* The app is deliberately free of streaks, reward loops, and notification hooks* It meets parents in the moment — because as Jacqueline says, “in the moment, you need something simple”For families in the UAE navigating regional tensions and uncertainty, Hoopla is offering something quietly radical: not a fix, but a focus. The app’s free interactive tools also include parent guides with specific language for talking to children about war, displacement, and change.👉 Download their free Parent Guide here: hooplafun.com/this-might-helpKey Takeaways* Body-first emotional regulation is more accessible and easy to understand for young children* Co-play and family connection are built into the app’s core design* Digital wellness isn’t about less screen time — it’s about more presence* Practical, in-the-moment tools matter more to parents than theory“So many parents come to us and say - we’ve read all the books, done all the courses, but don’t know what to do in that very moment. In the moment, you need something really simple.”-Jacqueline Incorporating mindfulness into family life is not only beneficial but necessary in our digital age. By utilizing tools like Hoopla, families can reconnect, communicate better, and cultivate a nurturing environment. Check out Hoopla on iOS and give their meditation a try. Thanks for reading The Parenting Reboot with Deepa! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work. Get full access to The Parenting Reboot with Deepa at deepavd.substack.com/subscribe

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Going Analog in a Digital World: How One Mom and Educator Is Reclaiming Childhood — One Small Moment at a Time

Apr 100:46:23Tap to summarize

Motherhood can be a beautiful yet overwhelming journey — especially in today’s hyper-connected world. Most of us are quietly grappling with the same tension: we love technology, we depend on it, and we’re also watching it slowly reshape our children’s childhoods in ways we didn’t sign up for.On the latest episode of the Parenting Reboot, I sit down with Danielle Mussafi — a Brooklyn-based early childhood educator, Substack writer, and creator of Ordinary Animals — to talk about what it means to parent and teach with intention in an age of infinite distraction.Danielle’s husband is a high school teacher. Between the two of them, they see every stage of what technology is doing to young people — in classrooms, in playgrounds, and at home. And their shared conclusion? It’s not working. It’s not worth it.Why “Ordinary Animals”?Danielle’s philosophy centers on one quietly radical idea: we are human animals, and that is enough. In a world that constantly nudges us to optimize, perform, and produce — Danielle argues for the opposite. She invites us to celebrate our ordinariness. To find meaning not in highlight reels, but in the mundane, the unplanned, the unphotographed.Motherhood, she says, has been one of the most grounding forces of her life — not because it made her extraordinary, but because it made her real.(And yes — we talk about matrescence, the profound psychological transformation of becoming a mother. Fun fact: it still hasn’t officially made it into the dictionary.)Thanks for reading The Parenting Reboot with Deepa! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.The Disappearance of Free PlayAs an early childhood educator, Danielle has watched a slow erosion happen in real time. Safe, unstructured outdoor spaces for kids are disappearing. The village has thinned out. Third spaces — the parks, open spaces, the after-school corner — are vanishing.And when kids can’t negotiate, argue, invent rules, and manage boredom together without adult supervision, something important goes missing. “Sometimes coming up with the rules of the game takes hours. And then they only play for a little bit — because the rules, the negotiating, is the play.”- DanielleTV and phones, she says, have become default co-parents — not because parents are failing, but because the social net we once relied on has frayed. We don’t live in villages anymore. Extended families are spread thin. And safe places for children to simply be children are harder to find.The Push Back Against EdTechDanielle and her husband aren’t alone in their skepticism — and the conversation is finally starting to shift. Teachers and parents are seeing, firsthand, that technology in classrooms isn’t delivering on its promises. EdTech was sold as a revolution. Many are now questioning the return.She’s not anti-tech. She’s pro-intentionality.“It’s not screens, screens, screens,” she says. “If you can separate it out and just say — I’m going to wait as long as I possibly can to introduce personal devices to my children — that’s where you start.”So, What Does “Going Analog” Actually Mean?I asked Danielle to define it. Her answer surprised me with its simplicity:“It’s really just about reclaiming small moments of your attention and your intention inside whatever life you’re actually living.”Not a rejection of technology. Not a privilege reserved for those who can opt out. Just a conscious redirect — toward breath, toward movement, toward presence.The things she suggests are mostly free: take a walk, write a gratitude list, do 10 jumping jacks, spend 15 minutes colouring. These aren’t lifestyle upgrades. They’re attention practices.And if going analog feels like a privilege? Danielle is direct: “Then we may have lost the plot.”The Practical Bit: Audio as a BridgeIf you’re trying to transition your kids away from screens, Danielle offers one beautifully simple tip: try audio first.TV delivers the strongest dopamine hit of any screen — vivid colors, fast pace, a completely passive experience. Switching a child straight from that to building blocks is a recipe for a meltdown (their nervous system is adjusting, not being difficult).Key Takeaways:* Matrescence is real — becoming a mother transforms your identity, and that transformation deserves to be named and honored.* Free, unstructured play is disappearing — and with it, the social and emotional skills children develop when left to negotiate the world themselves.* Third spaces matter — communities, institutions, and governments have a role to play in creating safe, unsupervised spaces for kids to be kids.* EdTech isn’t delivering — teachers and parents are pushing back, and the conversation is finally gaining mainstream traction.* Going analog isn’t all-or-nothing — it’s about reclaiming small moments of attention, one intentional choice at a time.* Audio is your bridge — when transitioning kids from screen time, use audio as a middle step before jumping to active play.* Find your people — seek out parents and educators in your community who share your values around low-tech childhood.For more insights on parenting and navigating the digital landscape, check out Danielle’s work at Ordinary Animals. Show her some love! Get full access to The Parenting Reboot with Deepa at deepavd.substack.com/subscribe

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3 Things That Form the Basis of an Ethical AI Design | With Privacy Expert Megs Shah

Mar 1800:40:33Tap to summarize

I’ve been away for a bit, but I’m back — and this conversation with Megs Shah, co-founder of the Parasol Cooperative, felt like exactly the right episode to return with.Megs is building technology the way it should have been built from the start: with human safety and agency at the center, not revenue. Under Parasol, Shah built Ruth, an AI tool for survivors of exploitation and abuse. They don’t require accounts. They don’t ask for personally identifiable information. They actively discourage users from sharing it. That’s rare. And it raised a question I haven’t been able to stop thinking about: why do we accept so much less from every other app our kids are using?“We have gone to the degree that humans are the product. And we have got to stop doing that.” - Megs Shah, The Parasol CooperativeMegs also breaks down three principles that she believes should guide all technology design — safety, privacy, and dignity. We talked about what consent actually looks like in a digital world, why your child’s gaming app probably doesn’t need their location, and the difference between parental supervision and surveillance. Takeaways* Parents must cultivate trust with their children from an early age.* Open dialogues about technology and online safety are crucial.* Understanding the ethical implications of AI is essential for parents.* Digital safety tools should be used to empower children, not control them.* Parents should regularly audit their children’s devices and apps.* Teaching children about consent is vital in both physical and digital interactions.* Modeling good digital behavior is important for parents.* AI can be a tool for good, but it requires responsible use.* Parents should be aware of the data privacy policies of apps their children use.* The future of technology should prioritize safety and dignity for users.Food for thought: When did you last audit the apps on your child’s phone together? Or even your own phone?This episode is going to be worth your time — whether you’re a parent, an educator, or anyone who uses technology (so, everyone). Happy listening!Thanks for reading The Parenting Reboot with Deepa! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work. Get full access to The Parenting Reboot with Deepa at deepavd.substack.com/subscribe

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How to raise an uninfluenced generation: A former school teacher's guide for parents navigating modern childhood

Dec 300:47:28Tap to summarize

If someone handed you a book on how to raise grounded, emotionally strong, clear-thinking kids in a world run by algorithms, wouldn’t life be easy? I just finished reading Uninfluenceable and got a chance to sit down with the author of this book — Alanna Gallo. She is a former public school teacher, mom of four, and education consultant.Alanna and I get into the messy, confusing reality of raising children in a world where technology has quietly become the third co-parent. Social media punishes nuance, algorithms feed polarization, and kids are handed screens as quickly as snacks. Bored? Screen. Tantrum? Screen. Slightly too quiet? Screen.And from birth, many children are trained into constant stimulation — light-up toys, sensory overload, apps tracking every feed and nap. Somewhere along the way, many of us lost touch with our own intuition.Alanna breaks down what truly hasn’t changed:Kids still need attachment, security, real-world stimulation, and adults who preserve their childhood instead of outsourcing it. Tech companies aren’t designing for our childrens’ well-being — they’re designing to maximize their attention for profits. But here’s the empowering part:Parents still hold the real decision-making power. We choose when (and if) the devices enter our homes. We choose the rhythms, the boundaries, and the experiences that shape our families.Alanna leaves us with three grounded rules that every parent can start using today:* Don’t use tech to fix boredom or discomfort.* Make family connection non-negotiable.* Be intentional about who your family spends time with.We also explore the growing movement of families redefining wealth — not as money, but as time: time outdoors, time together, time off of screens, time living in the real world.This episode is an invitation to slow down, reconnect, and remember that our kids are human beings — not products for algorithms.New episodes out every other Wednesday. Follow the Parenting Reboot: Get full access to The Parenting Reboot with Deepa at deepavd.substack.com/subscribe

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What does "right" education mean? A homeschooling mother's guide

Nov 1900:40:32Tap to summarize

Meet Sandhya Viswan, an engineer turn educator, homeschooling mum of two and now a consultant in the education sector in one of the largest cities in India. On the Parenting Reboot’s latest episode, Viswan and I unpack one of the biggest modern parenting dilemmas: What does “the right education” even mean anymore?She brings a refreshing, deeply practical lens to a world where schools market themselves more than ever, tech evolves faster than we can blink, and parents are overwhelmed by endless choices. “Parents know what they don’t want from education, but they don’t know what exactly they want.”- Sandhya V., Founder of EdDeedShe founded a a website called EdDeed, that acts as a search tool for many parents to simplify school discovery process for families.In this episode, we also explore:• Why the “top school” may not be the right fit• How homeschooling supports natural learning• The post-COVID shift in education in India• What parents actually want (but rarely articulate)• Personalized learning vs. reality• Technology as a tool — not a babysitterFrom post-COVID shifts to the explosion of educational technology, this episode is a map for any parent navigating an increasingly complex schooling landscape. And above all, Sandhya leaves us with hope: we are raising one of the best generations of children, and with the right guidance, they can thrive in a world that’s growing and shrinking at the same time.New episodes out every other Wednesday. Follow the Parenting Reboot: Get full access to The Parenting Reboot with Deepa at deepavd.substack.com/subscribe

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Teaching in Rural India: Why we need to rethink how we value education

Nov 500:43:21Tap to summarize

Education in India is evolving, but not always evenly. In this week’s episode of Parenting Reboot, I speak with Neha Gujar — a Teach For India program partner who’s been on the frontlines of education reform for over a decade.Neha’s journey is as fascinating as it is purposeful: from a defense background to transforming classrooms and communities across India. She has seen how education can shift the trajectory of an entire family — and how much more there is to fix at a systemic level, before every child has an equal shot.“Education can change the trajectory of an entire family — not just a child.”— Neha Gujar, Teach For IndiaAs a teacher and now an education consultant helping rural entrepreneurs design and deliver curriculums, Neha has seen both the brilliance and the burnout of the Indian education system — and she believes the way forward lies in redefining what “teaching” means. This conversation dives into why skill-building, empathy, and purpose must sit at the heart of the next education movement.We also talk about:* Why teaching should be seen as a nation-building profession — not a fallback job.* How technology has blurred the lines between learning with children and distracting them.* What empathy looks like in a system obsessed with marks.* And how parents, communities, and teachers can together redefine success — to raise happier, more resilient children.For too long, teaching has been treated as a fallback — a profession people “settle” into. But as Neha points out, the teachers who stay in the system aren’t there by chance; they’re there by choice. Education is more than textbooks — it’s about community and care. If you’ve ever questioned the kind of “success” schools reward, this conversation will move you.Learn more about Teach for India and the TFIx program.Teach For India👉 Subscribe to Parenting Reboot for conversations that help us rethink modern parenting, one episode at a time.New episodes out every other Wednesday. Follow the Parenting Reboot: Get full access to The Parenting Reboot with Deepa at deepavd.substack.com/subscribe

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Technology is using us more than we use it | Do you scroll by choice — or without one?

Oct 2200:50:54Tap to summarize

We weren’t born with devices — and yet, they now shape every part of our day.Research shows that kids as young as 11 own smartphones, and two-year-olds make up a significant YouTube viewing audience. But the real problem isn’t the screen — it’s the system behind it.This week on Parenting Reboot, I sat down with Riz Vazir, founder of Scroll By Choice, a Seattle-based initiative helping families and workplaces build digital resilience. Riz calls himself a techno-optimist — someone who doesn’t fear technology but insists that we must learn to live with it consciously.“We were all focused on the features our devices came with,” he says.“But no one taught us how to orient our lives, thinking, and behaviors around something so powerful that fits in our pockets.”We spoke about the illusion of control, the algorithms shaping our values, and why digital wellness is a life skill—not a luxury.Takeaways from this episode:* Technology is a relationship, not a tool. You have to nurture it.* Algorithms aren’t neutral. They serve their masters — always.* Parents model tech behavior. Kids watch not what we say, but what we do when stressed, bored, or lonely.* Going “screen-free” isn’t realistic. We need to teach techno-resilience, not nostalgia for a world that doesn’t exist anymore.* Our attention is currency. Kids are ready for this conversation — ask them: “Who makes money off this app you love?”Riz believes the future of healthy tech lies in education, self-awareness, and values — not fear or restriction.“The algorithm isn’t a tech problem,” he says. “It’s a values problem.”And that, perhaps, is the most powerful insight of all. Learn more about the work Scroll By Choice does here. New episodes out every other Wednesday. Follow the Parenting Reboot: Get full access to The Parenting Reboot with Deepa at deepavd.substack.com/subscribe

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Screens are the medium, not the message | Montessori and research meets modern parenting

Oct 101:05:46Tap to summarize

Parenting often feels like a tug-of-war. For the first time on the Parenting Reboot, I brought a parent and a psychologist / child tech expert together to talk about screen time, tech use in households and the challenge to balance it all out, especially without guilt and shame. Jenna Wawrzyniec is a mom of three is on a mission to simplify complex research and build a stronger parent community. Dr. Zachary Stuckelman studies how children interact with digital media. His mission is to shift the narrative away from fear and shame about screens and help families figure out where tech fits into their own puzzle.Takeaways1. Screens Are the Medium, Not the MessageDr. Zach reminded us that “the screen itself is the medium — it’s not the message.” What matters is the content and context: What are children watching? How is it edited? Can they apply what they see to real-life problem-solving?Research is often behind the pace of innovation. “By the time we can say definitively that a show like Bluey builds certain skills,” he notes, “the show may already be off the air.”That’s the push-and-pull of studying kids’ media in a fast-changing world.2. Core Skills for the Future: Concentration & Frustration ToleranceJenna focuses on two skills that she wants her own children — from infancy to adolescence — to keep developing:* Concentration: the ability to sustain focus on meaningful tasks* Frustration Tolerance: the capacity to cope with boredom, inconvenience, or setbacksMontessori education, she says, is “an education path for adaptation…we’re teaching kids how to think, how to be self-learners.”Dr. Zach adds the related concept of attention regulation — learning to prioritize what matters in a given moment and inhibiting distractions. Paired with emotion regulation, these skills form the foundation of healthy interaction with technology.3. A Balanced Approach to ScreensBoth guests cautioned against an all-or-nothing mindset. Jenna described her family’s approach as “warm and approachable, but still with boundaries” — her nine-year-old, for example, doesn’t yet have a smartphone because “he simply doesn’t have a real use case for it right now.”Dr. Zach used the “Halloween candy model” to explain why total prohibition can backfire:“If you forbid something completely and then suddenly allow it, you’re not helping a child build a healthy habit with that item.”Instead, parents can help by:* Setting age-appropriate limits* Mediating and co-viewing screen content* Talking about what kids see and connecting it to real-world learning.New episodes out every other Wednesday. Follow the Parenting Reboot: Get full access to The Parenting Reboot with Deepa at deepavd.substack.com/subscribe

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All episodes

Why the Tech Industry Isn't Solving Real Family Needs — Yet | With Founder & Mom Avni Patel-Thompson

Sexuality, Reproductive Health & Tech: How Do Parents, Kids Learn Today?

Raising Calm Kids in Uncertain Times: A Dubai-Mom's Guide to Mindfulness

Going Analog in a Digital World: How One Mom and Educator Is Reclaiming Childhood — One Small Moment at a Time

3 Things That Form the Basis of an Ethical AI Design | With Privacy Expert Megs Shah

How to raise an uninfluenced generation: A former school teacher's guide for parents navigating modern childhood

What does "right" education mean? A homeschooling mother's guide

Teaching in Rural India: Why we need to rethink how we value education

Technology is using us more than we use it | Do you scroll by choice — or without one?

Screens are the medium, not the message | Montessori and research meets modern parenting