Disassociating and Coping

Summary

The Southern Tea – "Disassociating and Coping"

Host: Lindsie Chrisley
Guest/Co-host: Becky
Release Date: April 22, 2026

---

Episode Overview

In this heartfelt episode of The Southern Tea, Lindsie Chrisley opens up about feeling "disassociated" and overwhelmed, navigating public and private pain, and rediscovering herself amidst the fallout of a difficult breakup. Alongside co-host Becky, the conversation meanders through themes of coping strategies, the messy realities of parenting, the toll of public scrutiny, friendship, and the challenges of maintaining relationships after motherhood. The two share candid stories, practical advice, and offer support for anyone going through tough transitions.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Disassociation and Coping with Overload (02:24–07:00)

• Lindsie admits to feeling detached and overwhelmed, letting household responsibilities slide (03:02).
  • "I just crashed out for an entire week and now my house is paying for it because I did not do one load of laundry in an entire week.” —Lindsie, 03:02
• Coping Mechanisms: Traditionally cleaning as stress relief, but in this episode, Lindsie shares that she is too exhausted to care.
• Therapy & Social Media Detox: Advised to delete social media apps due to the added stress of public scrutiny (06:01).
• The impact of having personal struggles play out publicly, making it impossible to escape or heal privately.

2. Grieving Relationships & Public Healing (07:00–13:00)

• Dealing with Public Breakups:
  • Both hosts discuss the relentless nature of public commentary when undergoing painful events (08:30, 09:09).
• Support Networks: Friends reach out, even if contact had diminished, offering much-needed comfort.
• Grieving Memories:
  • Lindsie: "Me walking around my house with a box, like, putting memories and stuff like that away really sucks." —Lindsie, 10:16
• The unique pressure of being held publicly accountable, making it harder but also acting as a catalyst for breaking destructive cycles (11:01).

3. Parenting While Processing Pain (13:00–17:31)

• Balancing personal healing with the unceasing needs of a child:
  • "I'm trying to prioritize my child, but knowing that, like, I really don't feel like I don't feel well and knowing that, like his life is still going on." —Lindsie, 11:13
• Hosting friends and sleepovers as a form of healing and returning to herself (09:25).

4. Everyday Chaos, Funny Disasters & Small Wins (17:42–22:48)

• Pilates & Disassociation:
  • Lindsie recounts going to Pilates hours after a traumatic night, highlighting her autopilot response to stress (16:07).
  • "I'm just on the news and, like, walking into Pilates so casually. This is not. Not normal." —Lindsie, 17:58
• Dead Possum Saga:
  • Becker and Lindsie discuss Lindsie rescuing a baby possum from her backyard and naming it Opie; a metaphor for finding new purpose amidst chaos (19:12–22:29).
  • "I almost lost mine and then brought life the next day. God works in mysterious ways." —Lindsie, 21:06

5. Fidget Toys, Trivial Distractions & Small Joys (22:50–25:00)

• Light-hearted conversation about collecting and using fidget toys (Nidos) as stress relief, bonding with her son Jackson, and the simple joys found in new routines and purchases (23:01–24:29).

6. Friendship Dynamics, Guilt, and Life Changes (32:18–35:00)

• Honest discussion about missed connections, the limitations of being able to 'drop everything' during a crisis, and appreciating friends who check in without needing answers (32:18).
• Becky shares stress over her child's (Bex) medical checkups and the emotional burden of possible health complications (33:55).

7. Downsizing and Family Adaptation (36:08–38:18)

• Becky reveals plans to move and downsize, explaining changing family priorities and pressures like high utility bills and the burden of maintaining a large house (36:08).
• Reflects on personal growth through learning renovations and being self-reliant (37:25).

8. Healing After Toxic Relationships and Looking Ahead (47:06–50:23)

• Becky asks, "Would you rather be single for the rest of your life or with one of your exes?" sparking a discussion on readiness for healthy relationships.
• Lindsie realizes the need to focus on self-healing before considering a new relationship (49:19).
  • "I am in no way, shape or form in a position to, like, really offer anybody anything right now. Because I can't even offer certain things to myself." —Lindsie, 49:19

9. Motherhood, Marriage, and the Shifting Dynamic (52:54–67:40)

• Relationships Post-Baby:
  • Becky describes how having a child shifted her relationship with her partner Leah from being each other's world to parenting partners (52:54–55:30).
  • Lindsie and Becky compare experiences with drifting focus from marriage to child, leading to growing distance and unaddressed resentment.
• Communication & Resentment:
  • The importance of open dialogue and recognizing when adaptation is necessary to avoid deeper marital issues.
  • "I think people all the time think, oh, wow, they have the craziest, like, wild it, why aren't they together? Type situation now Jackson's 13 and you're so right. Like, it's not hard to be a parent. What's hard is navigating the relational aspects within your home and where everybody kind of fits." —Lindsie, 61:25
• Love Languages:
  • Becky shares struggles of mismatched love languages with Leah, feeling "out-touched" or unappreciated when efforts aren't reciprocated in preferred ways (63:05–66:48).

10. Humor and Coping with Day-to-Day Mess (67:40–72:24)

• Light, relatable stories about being passive-aggressive, splitting household chores, and the psychological games couples play.
• The guilt and performative aspects of productivity around a partner.
  • "What can I make myself look like I'm doing, but, like, I'm not doing, literally. Am I right?" —Lindsie, 72:08

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Rock Bottom Realness:
  "Sometimes you have to really hit the rock bottom before you can move on and really start healing." —Lindsie, 08:30

• On Public Grief:
  "It's really hard being friends with people that are constantly just being critiqued online because I know you outside of the way that people know you... you guys go through as well with this because you're just constantly having to relive the worst parts of your life." —Becky, 06:01

• Possum Rescuer:
  "I almost lost mine and then brought life the next day. God works in mysterious ways." —Lindsie, 21:06

• Parenting Amidst Chaos
  "I'm trying to prioritize my child, but knowing that, like, I really don't feel like I don't feel well and knowing that, like his life is still going on." —Lindsie, 11:13

• On Healing & Relationships:
  "If I can't fill it for myself, how am I ever going to do that for anybody else?" —Lindsie, 49:39
  "There’s not many people that can withstand that and that are like, don’t turn into toxic people themselves." —Becky, 49:39

• On Shifting Priorities Post-Baby:
  "Will hung the moon in my eyes. Right. And then when I had Jackson, it was immediately I gave birth to that child and my whole focus shift." —Lindsie, 53:20

---

Timestamps for Key Segments

• Disassociation & Household Chaos: 02:54–07:00
• Public Pain & Healing: 07:00–13:00
• Parenting in Survival Mode: 13:00–17:31
• Possum Story & Humor: 17:42–22:48
• Fidget Toy Escapism: 23:01–25:00
• Friendship & Communication: 32:18–35:00
• Downsizing & Priorities: 36:08–38:18
• Healing and Relationship Readiness: 47:06–50:23
• Motherhood & Relationship Shifts: 52:54–67:40
• Humor in the Mundane: 67:40–72:24

---

Tone and Style

• Conversational, relatable, and sometimes humorous even in heavy moments.
• Vulnerability and candidness are hallmarks; both hosts share struggles and mishaps without sugarcoating.
• Encouragement for listeners to give themselves grace, prioritize self-care, and seek support.

---

Summary

For anyone struggling to keep up with life's storms, feeling disconnected, or reconciling the joys and hardships of parenthood and partnership, this episode of The Southern Tea offers solidarity, laughter, and hope. Lindsie's openness about her current challenges—paired with Becky’s empathy and humor—makes this a comforting listen for those navigating change and seeking honest conversation about the messiness of real life.

Transcript

[Lindsay Chrisley]

In a world where business owners everywhere are burning out. I just can't do it anymore.

[Becky]

And are losing their identities to AI.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Who even am I?

[Becky]

Only one website builder can save humanity from generic websites. It's here. It's really here.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Wix Harmony.

[Becky]

Where AI meets hands on control.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

So you can build the website you want exactly the way you want.

[Becky]

Try it for [e-mail] Harmony I barely

[Lindsay Chrisley]

got any sleep last night.

[Becky]

What? Why?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I spent hours fighting with AI. All because I was trying to make a website. It started out okay, but then I got stuck just trying to change one button. Okay, okay, relax. Just try WIX Harmony. What's that? It's wix's new website builder. Lets you switch back and forth between AI tools and hands on editing anytime. So I'm not just prompting and praying?

[Becky]

Nope.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Just. Just try it for [e-mail] Harmony Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile. I don't know if you knew this, but anyone can get the same Premium

[Becky]

Wireless for $15 a month plan that I've been enjoying. It's not just for celebrities. So do like I did and have one of your assistant's assistants switch you to Mint Mobile today.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I'm told it's super easy to [e-mail] Switch upfront payment of $45 for 3 month plan equivalent to $15 per month required intro rate first 3 months only. Then full price plan options available. Taxes and fees ext [e-mail] maybe I'm just like weird. Maybe I'm crunchy. This is the Southern Tea with Lindsay Chrisley. I think it's so funny when you get Christmas cards and all of these people write their children's accomplishments on the back. I don't love them. A southern girl and a boy mom who's trying to navigate life while staying true to her roots. I am a functioning non functioning human being right now. Join Lindsay each week as she swears to spill the tea, the whole tea and nothing but the tea. Tea that is the tea. Here's Lindsay. Good morning, Becky.

[Becky]

Good morning, Lindsay. It still sounds like I'm in an airplane.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Why?

[Becky]

I don't know.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

What are you hearing? The dishwasher's not going off anymore.

[Becky]

Oh, there we go. It literally just went away. I didn't know what I was going to do, but here we are.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Well, hello, good morning and welcome back to another episode of the Southern Tea. How are we doing?

[Becky]

Good morning. I'm doing. I'm doing all right. It's been a. It's been a Hell of a week.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

You're telling me. Are you telling me, you know, different scenarios?

[Becky]

You know, I have some. I have some questions about me, but I would love to hear. Just how are you? Are you good? What's the vibe here?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

No, I am disassociated, as Alessandra tells me.

[Becky]

Okay.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I just crashed out for an entire week and now my house is paying for it because I did not do one load of laundry in an entire week. Didn't clean up anything. I've got 95 needles of Jackson's on the counter. My house never looks like this. It's very alarming.

[Becky]

Two things. Number one, do give yourself a little bit of grace. Totally fine. For the scenario of things of your house being the way it is, you are. Okay. You're gonna go down this healing journey, but, like, your house is, like, of zero importance right now. Like, if the worst thing right now is cluttering, building up, we'll get there. That'll be there at any point. Here we go. Number two, can I have one of those Nidos?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Of course you can. Like, you saw the amount of needles that are in my house.

[Becky]

I don't have one. And Kale introduced me to them and

[Lindsay Chrisley]

now I need one. This is insane. So I actually introduced Kale to the Nido trend and I. Let me show you what I bought for me and Kale and Jackson because, you know, kill my house in May.

[Becky]

She's coming there.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Yeah.

[Becky]

Can I come?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Yeah, everybody can come. It's going to be a free for all. Look. My first purchase on the Tik Tok shop are the.

[Becky]

What are they?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

It's a neato phone case. See them?

[Becky]

Damn. I think I need that.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I feel like you need it.

[Becky]

Do they come in black?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

They came in, like, every different color. But K and Jackson both wanted blue and I of course, needed to get the pink one. So that was my first TikTok shop person purchase. And I'm really proud of myself. Yeah. So mainly whenever I get in very stressful situations, like, I will clean stuff. The coping mechanism, I guess, that I've learned to use. And for whatever reason, this, like, last hurrah of stuff that I've gone through, I'm like, I literally don't care about the house.

[Becky]

That's fine. That's fair. I think that's a sign of, like, change is coming, you know?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Right. It was just so bad. And I think that maybe people listening can understand this, but probably wouldn't relate to it that, like, when you're going through something really heavy in Your personal life. And then you're also happening to, like, battle some of that heaviness publicly. That makes it really hard because you're never away from it. Right. Like I say all the time, okay, if something goes on in my relationship and it was just at home and I could focus on that stuff at home. Not that it makes it any better that anything happened, but it would be somewhat easier than not being able to disconnect ever if I get on any social media app. Like, it's just a lot. And so I had therapy the other day, and she was like, lindsay, you need to delete every app off of your phone.

[Becky]

Yeah. It's such a unique situation for, you know, to be a friend of people that go through this because obviously I don't really go through public things because I like my. Not in any situation, too. But both of you have. First, I want to say I'm happy that you are here and alive and well. Well, being used as a loose term,

[Lindsay Chrisley]

but as well as firm that I would say I am.

[Becky]

But in, like, you are here, and that is what's important, like, most important, because you could not have been. And I am very thankful that you are present right now and that you have the ability to take this and choose to do what's next and, you know, best for you. And I've been thinking about you so much. Obviously, since all this happened, we haven't really talked. I've been giving you your space, what you need, and I don't ever expect you to answer or anything of those sorts. I know that you know that I'm here supporting you from afar. It is hard to see the Internet strum up words around friends and people that I love and care about because you automatically want to defend or to answer or to. But then it just adds to it, like, when. Because it'll just fuel the conversation to continue to go. And I think people have a really. Like, they can't understand because they've never been in that situation or even been friends with. It's like, really hard being friends with people that are, like, constantly just being critiqued online because I know you outside of the way that people know you or that strangers know you. And it's. It's really hard. And I can only imagine what it is that. That you guys go through as well with this because you're just constantly having to relive the worst parts of your life. And, like, people are just constantly reminding you of that. So I'm sorry that you are in this situation. I'm sorry that you're going to continue to have to deal with this online. But I truly believe that, you know, I don't think you were in the best place before this. And I think that hopefully what comes forward from this will be the healing and, like, love and everything that you need and you deserve.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

So I think that when you're in a relationship and, you know, hey, this is probably not the best thing for me, but it's really hard to, like, disconnect from that. So whether it be there's been trauma, bonds created within that relationship, and, you know, there is an aspect of time spent and then an aspect of effort, and this is literally what I do every day of my life. I knew better, so I should have done better. And I'm not going to say that I'm happy with the situation and what transpired, but what I will say is that I think sometimes you have to really hit the rock bottom before you can move on and really start healing. And I told Madison because you and I were supposed to record on Friday, and I was like, hey, I'm just like, I'm not in a good place. I'm. I'm not ready, and I'm probably gonna need to do that on Monday or Tuesday next week. And she was like, no. Like, we totally get it. And this morning, I woke up, like, on a completely new leaf. I spent a lot of time with Jackson. He had a sleepover at my house over the weekend and hung out with friends and had, like, a Sunday fun day at my house, which was really nice because I normally don't host, so that's a change. And it was just. It was a good time and refreshing, something that I needed. And I feel like I was cut off from a lot of relationships that I didn't even realize was happening. And so for people to rally around me, knowing that I had kind of, like, moved away from those relationships has been refreshing, but it's also been really hard. Like, me walking around my house with a box, like, putting memories and stuff like that away really sucks.

[Becky]

Yeah. I mean, you're mourning a lot, right? Like, there's a lot of aspects that you are being forced to mourn over an actual public situation. And I think that it. Part of me, and I hope you can understand, like, part of me is happy. I don't want to say happy. Like, thankful that there is some sort of public aspect to this, because in toxic relationships and when things like hap that happen like this are private, it's easy to continue that cycle because no one knows about It. Right?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Yeah.

[Becky]

Like, and so because of this, it puts you in a, in a really hard situation to have to deal with it because people around you are going to hold you accountable for it as well.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

And it's like you almost are, are forced into, okay, I can't act like this didn't happen, you know, can't act like nobody knows about it. And so, yeah, I think that that's been as hard as it's been. It's been helpful in a lot of ways. And it's really hard also going through something like this and being a parent too. Right. Like, I'm trying to prioritize my child, but knowing that, like, I really don't feel like I don't feel well and knowing that, like his life is still going on. Right. And I have to prioritize that and make sure he's happy, healthy and whole. And you know, the average person would be like, wow, like with everything that's transpired and the stuff that you're publicly going through and you're just like hosting sleepovers and get togethers at your house. That's crazy. But it's been so healing.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Did you guys know that three out of four US Homes have toxic chemicals in their tap water? Even though contaminated water looks clear, it could be putting you at risk for devastating health concerns including fatigue, hormone disruption, disruption, cognitive decline, and even cancer, which is so scary. And surprisingly, standard fridge and pitcher filters do very little to remove most contaminants and bottled water contains microplastics. That's why I want to introduce you guys to Aqua True, the countertop water purifier. Tested and certified to remove 84 contaminants including chlorine, lead, forever chemicals and microplastics. It is patented 4 stage reverse osmosis system that goes way beyond ordinary filters for pure healthy water that you can trust there is plumbing or no installation. I am absolutely obsessed with my Aqua True. I drink so much more water now and Jackson has learned how to use it and he's drinking a lot more water now as well. Aqua True has been featured in Business Insider, Popular Science and named best countertop water filter by Good Housekeeping. You guys can join the 98 of customers who say their drinking water is cleaner, safer and healthier. Go to aquatrue.com now for 20 off your purifier using promo code Southern Tea. Aqua True even comes with a 30 day best tasting water guarantee. That's aquatru.com A Q U A T R U.com promo code Southern Tea All Right, ladies? Whether you're in the middle of your pregnancy journey or adjusting to life with a newborn, things are constantly shifting, including what feels comfortable. You might be getting used to your changing body, nursing or pumping around the clock, or just trying to find your new normal as a mom. Kindred bravely is a brand that I wish that I had whenever I was going through this journey. I actually just gifted this to one of my girlfriends who is expecting and I'm so excited for her to be able to get her stuff. If you've never heard of Kindred bravely, they make intimate and apparel for maternity, postpartum and breastfeeding, as well as baby essentials, all designed to make early motherhood feel a little less overwhelming and more supported. You guys might know Kindred bravely for their best selling hands Free Pumping and nursing bra, which is something that I am gifting my girlfriend. But they also do way more than that. They make the softest maternity and postpartum clothes, including plus sizes that you're actually to want to keep wearing long after breastfeeding. And their Stork baby collection has really cute, practical clothes and accessories for little ones. I also got a couple of pieces of that for her baby that we don't know what it is yet, so I'm really excited for her to get this stuff. Kindred bravely has been trusted by millions of moms since 2015, and everything is designed by moms who have been there. And right now, Kindred bravely is offering my listeners 20% off your first order when you go to kindred bravely.com Southern Tea that's kindred bravely.com Southern Tea for 20 off your first order. Make sure that you use my link so that they know that I sent you. And exclusions apply.

[Becky]

I mean, your life doesn't stop around you and I think that I I Healing and grief is so unique from a parental perspective, like your own healing and grief because like being a parent is such like a selfless thing and like your priorities are no longer yours, like your owns first. And of course our own healing, our own safety, our own growth is important. But like it's never singular. It's never a singular road that you're driving down. So but like your love for Jackson has been always something that has grounded you. So I think, you know, pouring into him and pouring into like people that have loved you, I think is the best thing that you can do.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Right? I was actually blessed that will let me have Jackson for the past two weekends so I could really just kind of Put my mind and focus on parenting.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

And I've been trying to go to bed at a decent time. The night that that all went down, I didn't get in the bed until after 4 o' clock in the morning. And then Kayla called me, and she was like, hey, girl. Like, are you okay and where are you going? And I'm like, again, disassociated. Like, why am I driving to Pilates? Like, after something like that happened? Like, that's insane.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

And then after I left Pilates, I was like, okay, I'm not going to a workout for the rest of the week. I'm going to take naps while Jackson's in school. Try to catch up on some sleep. Because there is something like. It's not physically tired. Right. It's like an emotional tired that you never can get enough sleep.

[Becky]

Yeah. I mean, breakups are. Are hard by themselves. Good breakups, bad breakups. Breaking up from a person, a friend, a family member. Like, breakups are heavy to begin with. And so adding all the different layers on top of it. Like, you need some time. Like, you need to take the time that you need to and heal your body and heal your mind and heal your heart. And that's a thousand percent not gonna happen in a week and two weeks. Right. Like, you have a. You've had a lot of healing that you've needed to do prior to this. So.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

And I think this is just, like, the catalyst that's gonna kind of, like, launch me into that direction. So I'm really glad. Then I come home from Pilates.

[Becky]

I can't believe you went to Pilates.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I mean, it's insane. What world.

[Becky]

I was with Kale, like, when all that. When all that happened and she was like, she's gone to Pilates. I was like, what?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Yeah, I'm like, I'm just on the news and, like, walking into Pilates so casually. This is not. Not normal. So I get home from Pilates and Hunter is at my house working, and he's stayed at my house a lot since that situation went down. And I walk in the door and I get a call from my neighbor, and she says, hey, Lindsay, I really hate to bother you, but I think there's a dead possum in your backyard. And I'm like, okay, Mary Jo. And she's like, I don't know. My dogs were outside last night. I really hope they didn't get it. Can you go out there and, like, check? I can bring a shovel over. And I see her, like, dinking around in her backyard. And I'm like, first of all, her dogs go on the fence. Like, her dogs didn't get this possum. And then I'm looking at it, and Hunter is, like, with me, and he's looking at it, and there's flies everywhere. And he. I said, maybe it's just playing, you know? Like, it looked like it was. It walked. And as it was walking, it just, like, you know, had a heart attack.

[Becky]

Just.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I'm pretty sure. And so I'm looking for, like, any marks on the back to see, like, if any animal possibly got it.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

And flip it over, and I see this, like, little wiggly thing on its belly.

[Becky]

Baby.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

A baby in the belly. So, number one, I did not know a possum was a marsupial. So that's something that I learned. I also did not know that a possum could have a baby in its belly, be dead, and the baby still be nursing.

[Becky]

She sent me a video of it. So I'm looking. Maybe it died giving birth.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I don't know. So I initially thought that, and I was like, oh, my God, that is so tragic. Like a possum to die, you know, during childbirth. That is easy. But then when I found, like, a little rehabber, she was like, no, this baby's, like, multiple weeks old because they're born without hair.

[Becky]

Yeah. Oh, yeah, they are. Maybe it died from it could have eaten something poisonous.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I mean, possibly.

[Becky]

So.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

So then I take care of this little possum. I find a box. I get it, a stuffed animal, and I'm like, okay, what are we gonna do with this thing? So I find a rehabber,

[Becky]

okay?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I find a rehabber. I take this possum with me to a patio, okay? Like a restaurant patio. And it's just chilling in this box with this stuffed animal. My ex husband comes up there, brings Jackson. They're, like, playing with the possum. I've been getting updates on this possum literally every single day. We named her Opie.

[Becky]

You know, people have possums as pets, right? Like, they can't.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I know. Like, I want to get her back. Look at her. She's just vibing.

[Becky]

She's thriving because of you. You brought life to that possum.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I almost lost mine and then brought life the next day.

[Becky]

God works in mysterious ways.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Mysterious ways, baby. So then we get her to this rehab place, and I'm getting all the updates on Opie. Well, the next day, I'm like, my car really needs to be washed. So take my car to the car wash I'm sitting in, I do, like, hand washes, and it's like a full service car wash place. Sitting there, minding my own business, drinking an Alani. And the little car wash guy comes in and he goes, hey, are you the one that owns this type of vehicle? And I said, yes, sir. And he goes, well, I think we wrecked it. I said, excuse me. Like, what? I can't take anymore. Like, my life is in the shitter. Okay.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Oh, no. They. They wreck my car.

[Becky]

No way.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I'm looking for the photo. Look, this is. This was sitting in my front seat of my car. When I get in, just the part from where they wrecked it, what happens? Like, I followed in it. Well, they filled out an incident report. They were trying to get me to leave, but, like, with everything that was already going on, I probably would have normally left the car wash without the incident report, but with all of the happenings, I was like, no, I'm. I'm leaving with that incident report. And y' all need a sign that you all broke my car. Like. Like, what do you mean?

[Becky]

What are the chances of that?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Right? And I'm like, God's really trying. Like, he's trying to do something.

[Becky]

Yeah. I'm proud of you for not losing it.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Oh, I didn't lose it at that point. I think I was so emotionally done that, like, anything could have happened and it would not have mattered.

[Becky]

Fair. Fair.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

So today I woke up, chose absolute violence on this house, and stripped every bed, even ones that people didn't sleep in.

[Becky]

And now you're back to your cleaning the house?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I'm back to my cleaning the house days. What kind of needle would you like?

[Becky]

Whoa. I don't know. You see me playing with this fidget. What a transition. I didn't know there were different kinds.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Wait, you didn't know that there was different kinds of needles? What kind did you play with?

[Becky]

A cube. Yeah, a cube. A cube.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Oh, no, there's a lot. Kayl and I have a jellyfish. There's cats.

[Becky]

I feel like I like the cube because I like to try to make it square sometimes.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Oh, yeah. See, I get. Did you, like, hyper fixate on it?

[Becky]

Yeah, I was, like, putting it on things and, like.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Yeah, who would have ever thunk it that we would have been this old playing with needles, you know?

[Becky]

Not me. I'm. I'm also a little sad that I missed you in Delaware. Like, our days didn't overlap at all.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Well, Kale had actually asked me, prior to leaving if I wanted to extend my trip. And it probably would have prevented some happenings if I would have. And I would have been able to see you.

[Becky]

You know that I think it sounds like karma to me.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

It's not funny, Becky. It's too soon, you know?

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

You know what I mean.

[Becky]

Will I see you anytime soon?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Well, do you want to go to the Webbies?

[Becky]

When is it?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

May 11th.

[Becky]

May 11th.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Because you could technically be my date since Kale has a date and I no longer have one.

[Becky]

Can't go. We'll be in Charleston.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

What are you doing?

[Becky]

What?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

What are you doing in Charleston?

[Becky]

Did I not tell you my Mother's Day plans?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Oh, yeah, you did. Sorry. The house cleaners are coming in, so you're gonna hear a squeaky door. I. I'm going on my bar crawl

[Becky]

for Mother's Day, and I'm ending in Charleston and then spanking. Spending a couple days there.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

That's just really wild work. I know I already said it, like, but a bar crawl on Mother's Day

[Becky]

in three different states?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Is that just, like, a lesbian thing?

[Becky]

I actually don't think it's a les. Look at this pimple. Oh, my God. I don't think it's a lesbian thing at all, actually. I don't know if there's gonna be another lesbian there.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Oh, really?

[Becky]

Yeah, I think it's like. I don't know. We'll see what kind of people are there. I've never done it.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Lesbian stuff is so interesting to me. Just like the thoughts of going to a bar and just, like, crawling through multiple bars on Mother's Day. My idea of Mother's Day. And I know that this is, like, a very taboo topic. Some people, like, some moms want, like, self care, and they don't want to hang out with their kids on Mother's Day. Yeah, I get it. But, like, I could never be it.

[Becky]

That's Leah. Yeah. Leah's like, so you're like, mother's Day doesn't make sense to me without spending it with Bex. And I was like, oh, yeah, that's

[Lindsay Chrisley]

what made me a mother. So, like, yeah, I wouldn't be celebrating this holiday otherwise. So why are we, you know?

[Becky]

Yeah, fair. Fair opinion.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

So is Bex just going to be strapped to you walking through these bars?

[Becky]

Bex is not going to be with me. He's going to be with Leah, who's going to be in Charleston waiting for us, and then we have a little vacation time down there.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I feel like that's all you'll do.

[Becky]

It's a what?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Go on vacation.

[Becky]

I work hard to enjoy life. We. Yeah, we're going to be in Charleston for a couple days. She's going to be down there. It's a bar. The bar crawls in three states. So we start in new York, go to into Tennessee and Nashville and then end in Charleston. So I have three, two flights that

[Lindsay Chrisley]

day just to go to this bar?

[Becky]

Yeah, the bar. You have to go to three of their locations and all three locations are in different states.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Oh, see, no. That would be a no for me.

[Becky]

I wouldn't expect it to be a yes for you.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

So trying to board flights to go on a work obligation, let alone for luxury.

[Becky]

Do you know how many flights I have booked for already this year? No, but I have 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14. Who books flights

[Lindsay Chrisley]

that much in advance?

[Becky]

Me, I have. And I haven't booked London yet. Actually. That's it. London. I need to book. But Leah and I are going to Michigan for fourth of July weekend to lake Michigan. Our bex's donor invited us to spend fourth of July weekend with him and his family on their lake house. So cool.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

So cool.

[Becky]

So bex will get to meet Matt's whole family. So, you know, his sisters, his brother, his parents are going to be there. So bex gets to meet the whole donor crew.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

All right, we're going to take a quick break to talk about brodo bone broth because I have become obsessed and if you have ever TR bone broth and hated the taste, then you are like me and you don't want to ever have bone broth. But brodo is so good. It is truly the best bone broth that I have ever tasted. We've been using it in my meal prep every single week. And if you've been on social media lately, I'm sure that you've probably heard people talking about the importance of gut health. But how do you actually get better gut health? And that is bodo's bone broth. If you care about your gut health, protein and real whole foods, this next sponsor might be the easiest habit that you can add to your day. And it certainly has been the easiest habit that I've added to my week. This podcast is sponsored by brodo. Brodo's bone broth is the simplest nutrition upgrade that you can make to your daily routine. Their broths are made from scratch so no concentrates, preservatives or shortcuts. So you get the best broth money can buy. I'm also a big packaging fan and their packaging is absolutely phenomenal. Each cup of brodo delivers about 10 grams of whole food protein along with collagen, building amino acids, electrolytes and nutrients to support gut health, immunity, joints, skin and just general wellness. All under 50 calories and with zero sugar or fat. I'm going to recommend you guys trying their sampler pack so you can figure out for yourself what flavor is best for you. There is not one that I have tried that I do not like so this is your sign to shop the best broth on the planet with brodo. Head to broto.com tea for 20% off your first subscription order and use code T for an additional $10 off. Once again, that's brodo.com backslash T for 20 off your first subscription order and an additional $10 off if you use my promo code T. Tons of parents say I didn't plan on formula and most don't. I was one of Those and yet 74% of families turn to it at some point in their feeding journey. As a new parent, I know that you're already exhausted and nervous and having to decode long ingredient lists or blindly distrusting brands without much transparency. It does feel like a lot. And parents should not have to bend over backwards to understand what they're feeding their newborn. And that's where Little Spoon stands out. They're explicit about what's in their organic grass fed whole milk infant formula, how it's sourced and how each batch is safety tested. And to back it up, they publish their testing result right on their site. But the best part is once you're through the formula stage, you don't have to scramble all over again. Little Spoon is built to be a feeding partner from day one with expert crafted recipes for babies, toddlers and big kids, pediatric guidance, and a community of parents just like you. It's nutrition for every stage of babies plus kids development already thought through and delivered to your door. And when peace of mind shows up like that, it's worth holding on to. Seriously, I could not recommend Little Spoon more. And when your baby is ready for the next stage, Little Spoon has it. So from your baby's first cereal to their first puree or finger food, Little Spoon has a full feeding system from day one. If formula is part of your feeding journey right now, Little Spoon makes that choice feel less heavy. Their organic grass fed whole milk infant formula is a complete nutrition recipe modeled after breast milk and everything is openly shared on little spoon.com from sourcing to ingredients to safety testing. Try Little Spoon Formula with your Toucan trial pack, buy one, get one free. That's $30 for two cans, which is so great if you're easing into the transition. That's L I T t L E S P O-O-N.com TryForMula Wait, can I ask you this? Like, he's met Bex before, right?

[Becky]

He did, when Beck was two months old.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

And, like, what was that interaction like? Was there any type of, like, biological?

[Becky]

I think so. Like, Beck smiled at him. Like, his first, like, true smiles were when Matt was holding him.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Really?

[Becky]

Yeah. So I think. I think there was probably just this known connection, but it's, you know, it's such a unique situation. Right? Like, it's not for everyone. Matt and his husband are both in the. In the process of building their family, so they understand the complexities behind. Right. Building a family in this unique way. So. And, like, we talk to Matt, like, weekly, if not like, a couple times a week. Like, he's our friend. Like, we love him.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

That's so cool. Well, so I was on the phone with Madison the other day, and I was going through the Chick Fil a drive through, trying to get me a little crispy coke. And I said, I feel so bad that, like, I have not responded to Becky, but if you saw what my phone looked like, I don't take that personally. And I said, oh, my God. And I don't want her to be upset because we can't record today, but, like, I'm literally just not well. And she was like, oh, Becky has some stuff going on, too. Like, she might be moving. And I said, moving

[Becky]

what? You know, just normal things over here.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Casually moving. I.

[Becky]

First of all, I would never be offended if you did. Unless I was reaching out in, like, a I need help way. Like, I really. I need, like. Yeah, if I was, like, entrusting in you to, like, help me. But even at that point, like, I. After becoming a mom and just, like, people have their own. So I. But I wanted to make sure, like, I kept texting you, not asking questions. I just wanted you to make sure that, like, I was. Was just sending love. Like, I was thinking about you letting you know if you did need anything. Obviously. Here. Yeah. Moving. Oh, there's a. Yeah, there's just a bunch of going on over here. Being a parent's really hard there. We've been dealing with some, like. I don't want to say complications, but just some things with Bex. His head is really big. And so the doctor was concerned about, like, the size of his head. So we actually today had to go get ultrasound and scans on his head just to make sure that everything was okay. And so last week I was not. Like, no one prepares you for medical complications of a child. And then I go into this spiral of guilt of people that have confirmed medical complications and I'm like, how, like how my chest has been just, just like so heavy and just overwhelmed with it all. But I, I think it's gonna be all right. I think he just has a, A big head.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

So he's got big noggin.

[Becky]

Yeah. Yeah. We have to meet with a peds neuro to just confirm everything. But developmentally, like the kid is 10 out of 10. Right? Like he has no. There's no signs of complications. So it's. That's like less concerning.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I know when I see videos of him, I feel like he's so like advanced.

[Becky]

Yeah, I feel like that too. So just so cute.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

So wait, how did the moving like come about in one week of time that I didn't talk to you

[Becky]

has been a conversation that has been happening. So for those of you that know Leah and I, Leah's dad owns a house that we live in. It's been passed down in their family. It's a beautiful home. It is a 5,000 square foot house on 20 acres, has a pool. It feels like a resort. It is the most beautiful house and property you'll. You would ever want in your entire life. But having that size of things comes with a lot of upkeep, comes with a lot of maintenance and overhead. And recently with welcoming Bex into our lives, our priorities have kind of shifted. And Leah wants to work less. And so with her wanting to work less, we need to just downsize. And not even from like a financial. Also from just like consuming position. Like we only use half of our house, so like, why do we need this much house as well? So it has been a lot of conversations the past, I would say a year, like since. And then our electric bill has been eleven hundred dollars for the past like five months.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

And so the second person that told me about their electric bill being that

[Becky]

high and it's just like a lot like I don't want like, you see, we travel all the time. I don't want to not be able to do that because we have an eleven hundred dollar electric bill. Right. So we. I'm not happy about it because I spent six months renovating this house with my blood, sweat and tears. It's really sad. I'm like grieving it, but I know that ultimately, for our family, it's the best decision. So. So we'll be moving probably in a couple months.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Where you guys are you looking yet or.

[Becky]

So Leah's dad has another house he bought last year that he wanted us to move into, and we said no. And then. So that's the house that we're going to be going into. We just need to do some renovations and stuff over there.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

So did you do all of the renovations yourself? Like, HGTV style?

[Becky]

Yeah, I would say, like, 75% of them. I did. Yeah. I didn't do the floor just because the house was so big. That would have been a really large. But, like, I demo. Yeah, I did a lot of it.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Like, how did you just decide you're gonna get, like, a tool belt? Like, at what point? Yeah, fair question.

[Becky]

I am really bad. I'm. One of my worst qualities is I'm super impatient. So, like, if I ask for something and, like, I don't get a response or I, like, don't get help, I'm going to teach myself how to do it because I. I need to have that satisfaction and gratitude, like, right away. So when we started renovating, I would be calling contractors. People wouldn't show up, and it was so hard to get workers here. So I was like, it. Like, I'll just do it. And so I taught myself a lot. I can do, like, basic plumbing, right? Like, installing a toilet.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Crazy.

[Becky]

But, like, basic, right? Like, toilet sinks, stuff like that. I don't do electric just because I value my life and I don't want to, like, touch the wrong thing and, like, burn down a house and further. But, yeah, like, other. Mostly everything else I. I could do.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

That's insane. Like, you're basically a general contractor.

[Becky]

Basically, yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

General contractor Becky coming right up.

[Becky]

And I've logged myself building this office out, and so there's all that up

[Lindsay Chrisley]

on my socials, and, you know, here I am. I can't even remember to take my trash to the road on Tuesdays.

[Becky]

Well, Lindsay, you know, you are consumed by a lot in life, and we are here for whatever journey is next. And maybe that consists of remembering to take your trash out.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I might be a possum owner next, because the way I want Opie back so bad. Oh, my God. So we just had, like, a Sunday fun day at my house and did some meal prep, and then, like, some of my other friends came over and we ordered pizzas. Have you ever had heartburn in your life?

[Becky]

I haven't.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Okay, well, I've had it a Lot.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Got into that pizza, and my chest started getting tight, and I'm like, okay, this could be, like, one of a couple of things. I could be reaching the anxiety or panic attack that I should have already had. I could possibly be having a heart attack. Or this could just be heartburn. When I tell you it hurt and burned me from my chest all the way down the right side of my abdomen. I was, like, hunched over, and Jackson's like, wait, mom, what's going on? I'm like, I need to stretch out. Like, on the floor. I need to stretch out. I need. I am so tight. So one of my friends goes to the store and gets me some. What do they call that stuff? Heart.

[Becky]

Heart.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Heart. Oh, heartburn prevention. Heartburn prevention. Did that, so took one of those bad boys, and it absolutely did help. But then Jackson, like, rode with my friend to the store, and he was like, what would happen if my mom died and I was there by myself? And he was like, can she die from what she's going through right now? He was like, no, she just has heartburn. It's basically like a stomach ache in your heart. And he's like, yeah, but what would happen if my mom died? And, like, nobody was there and it was just me there? What would I do?

[Becky]

I mean, fair question, right? Did she. Did. Did your friend give that. Give him a good answer?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Yeah. He said, that's not gonna happen.

[Becky]

Nope. You should use that time to educate you. Call 91 1.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Oh, wait. Okay. What's so cute about little kids? So Jackson used to be like, I'm gonna call 991. And I'm like, you go ahead and call 9 9.

[Becky]

See where it gets you, because nobody's gonna answer.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

He would get in trouble at, like, preschool, and he'd be like, I'm gonna have to call 911. Go for it, buddy.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Like, what the. What the actual hell? So then I'm going through that, and I'm like, can this heartburn just, like, subside? I look over in my sink, and in the midst of my heartburn attack, Jackson has emptied out every needle that he has in his house. And I'm not even kidding you. It's like 95, and they're all in the sink.

[Becky]

Is he watching?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Doesn't have paper towels. Me. And I need to know if this happens to anybody else. But I feel like when I run out of, like, paper products, it's all at the same time.

[Becky]

You know what I mean?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Like, the toilet paper, the paper towels, trash bags, like, all of that stuff and maybe am I just like doing life wrong?

[Becky]

Couldn't tell you. Leah takes care of that aspect of life. So.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

All right y'. All, for all the parents out there with teenagers, we know that you're already trying to keep a million different things under control. Cash App is here to help make make sure your teens money and their spending isn't adding to all of that craziness. Cash App is designed to meet teens age 13 to 17 where they are with intuitive educational tools available through sponsorship by an eligible parent or guardian. Teens gain access to personalized Cash App card that comes in different colors and patterns to fit their style and the ability to instantly access money from family and friends. Cash App makes managing money feel easier and honestly just this cooler than other options out there. The platform also has tools that can help teens develop real world financial habits in a space that's safe and easy to navigate with all of your oversight and approval. If your teen is getting their first job, Cash App can get them access to their paychecks up to two days early and can help them achieve personalized savings goals that they can set themselves all within the app. With Cash App, these tools become something that they're actually going to want to use because they are designed with them in mind. And finally, nobody wants unnecessary surprises With Cash App there no monthly fees, no minimum balance requirements and no hidden charges when sending or receiving money. With a Cash App card, you and your teens balances receive 24. 7 fraud monitoring and if something ever feels off, you have the ability to lock their card right from your phone in just one tap. This is your sign to skip the stress and give your teen a way to learn financial responsibility with no hidden fees. Download Cash App and get started today. For a limited time, new Cash App Customers can earn $10 if they use code Family10 in their profile at Sign up and send $5 Friend within 14 days. Terms apply. Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App Bank Partners Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank Member FDIC Direct Deposit and promotions provided by Cash App, a Block Inc. Brand. Visit Cash App Slash Legal podcast for full disclosures. How did you get your website to look like that? Mine's so basic. Thanks. I just used Wix Harmony. Sounds fancy. What's that? It's wix's AI website builder. You can just tell it what you want and it builds you a whole site. So it's like vibe coding a website? Exactly, but even better because you can still click and edit anything by Hand. You don't have to use prompts for everything. Oh, that's neat. Yeah. Try it for [e-mail] Harmony My name's

[Becky]

MacKenzie and I started a GoFundMe for

[Lindsay Chrisley]

the adoptive mother of a non verbal autistic child.

[Becky]

The mother had lost her job because

[Lindsay Chrisley]

she wasn't able to find adequate care for this autistic child.

[Becky]

So she really needed some help with living expenses, paying some back bills. So I launched a GoFundMe to help support them during this crisis. And we raised about $10,000 within just a couple of months.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I think. I think that the surprising thing was by telling a clear story and just like really being very clear about what

[Becky]

we needed, we had some really generous donations from people who were really moved

[Lindsay Chrisley]

by the situation that this family was struggling with. GoFundMe is the world's number one fundraising platform, trusted by over 200 million people. Start your GoFundMe today at gofundme.com that's gofundme.com gofundme.com this podcast is is supported by GoFundMe. This is a paid message from GoFundMe. Meet Juan Naula. When his son was hospitalized for a viral infection, Juan started a GoFundMe to pay for medical expenses.

[Becky]

It was 5k to pay the bill for my son and I need only 22 hours. It was amazing. People really trust on GoFundMe.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

How did Juan raise $5,000 in less than a day? He posted a short video on GoFundMe me telling his story in 30 seconds.

[Becky]

30 seconds. Be specific, be quick and tell. What are you going to be using the funds for?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I was nervous to do it because

[Becky]

it doesn't feel okay to ask money. But you shouldn't be nervous. Sometimes you just have to do it and see the results. We were able to save my son's life thanks to gofundme that we still have my son with us.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Start your GoFundMe today at gofundme.com that's gofundme.com gofundme.com this message reflects one person's experience. See, that would just be so nice to, like, have a partner to where you could, like, divide and conquer.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Because it's just like, not a thing. I was watching my girlfriend with her husband and their three kids yesterday, and it's like the dividing and conquering just looks so nice and appealing. But then at the same time, I'm like, I'm kind of glad that I've had to do it. By myself, to some degree.

[Becky]

Are you? I don't know. I couldn't imagine.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I.

[Becky]

We were talking about, like, would you rather. Never mind. I'm gonna ask that.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Would you rather what?

[Becky]

Would you rather be single for the rest of your life or with your ex?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Ex.

[Becky]

With one of your exes. But I like, it makes me physically uncomfortable to think about being single. So.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Wait, can we talk about that more?

[Becky]

Sure. I have. I also have a couple other questions to ask you. Yeah, I'm like a habitual dater. I'm like, I've been single since I started dating girls. I've been single probably a month at max. And that's at like couple weeks. Like, probably that. Yeah. I don't do well by myself.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

See, I feel like. Because the general public thinks, oh, Lindsay's had three boyfriends since she got divorced. That was also four years ago. You know, like, people don't really put the timelines together. Timeline of everything together. And these also were. I mean, I wouldn't say long term, but like more long term relationships. So one of them was a year and the other two were two years.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

And now I feel like my life's just over. Like I just wasted two years of my life.

[Becky]

No, I think, think, you know, I don't know if I. I don't know if you, you would have been ready for a healthy relationship. And I think that moving forward where we are, we are getting there. Healthier, healthier you, healthier relationships. The first time we recorded, I said. I said something along those lines too.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I have this whole different mindset though. I'm like, okay, I'm not really worried about looks anymore. I'm not really worried about somebody to have just fun with. Like, I need to, like, think about, like, bigger things in life.

[Becky]

Like, you need to think about you as well.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Not.

[Becky]

I'm not saying, like, I'm a habitual dater. I'll never shade someone for jumping into relationships. But you need to think about your own craziness too. That you need to heal.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Oh, 1,000%. I was, when I was talking to my therapist, I said, I am in no way, shape or form in a position to, like, really offer anybody anything right now. Because I can't even offer certain things to myself. So if I can't fill it for myself, how am I ever going to do that for anybody else?

[Becky]

Yeah, it takes a. It takes a certain kind of person to heal someone that's been in a toxic relationship. Because, like, I had been in toxic relationships before I met Leah and, like, she was like my punching bag of get getting through those cycles of that I needed to out learn from my exes. So, like, there's not many people that can withstand that and that are like, don't turn into toxic people themselves. So there. There's someone out there and we'll find

[Lindsay Chrisley]

that person, but it's just not a priority for sure. There's so much that's on my plate that I'm like, the thoughts of that at all is just not appealing now.

[Becky]

We're healing Lindsay right now.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

What's very appealing to me is that now my focus can fully be just on my kid, on my personal life with the friendships that are healthy for me. And I probably need to go on a Iowaska trip.

[Becky]

Yes. Yeah. I really hope you do. I think that would be really good for you. Right.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

But then I like to, like, vlog it, but I'm like, that's not the point.

[Becky]

No, you can't vlog it. You can write after. Like, you can film your. Like, this is. This is what happened.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Yeah.

[Becky]

Or like, just take some B roll while you're there. But then. Or like, do like maybe nightly vlog, like journals that you could use from it to speak through your experience of it. But I think it could be really good for you.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

How long do you go on these things?

[Becky]

There's all different kinds. So, like, you could do just a weekend retreat or a week retreat.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Oh, honey, the weekend would not even touch the surface of what we've got going on over here. Yeah.

[Becky]

So maybe a week, maybe a month.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Questions that you have for me.

[Becky]

Oh. So Lee and I are in, I think, a turning point of our relationship. I think the past, past. The past year has been really hard for us as a couple because of becoming parents and just like navigating this as a whole. I never expected to have, like, having a kid to disrupt my life as much as it has. And I've never expected having a kid to disrupt my relationship as much as it has. And so I think one of the hard parts and I was explaining this to Leah was like, like, for the past, Lee and I will have been together for 10 years this year, and for the past nine years, let's say, or eight years, because the first two years of our relationship were iffy. My entire identity was consumed by my love for Leah and her love for me and how amazing and beautiful our relationship was. And so for this past year, that's like, been stripped from me because our relationship isn't our priority. It's literally just getting through Becoming a parent. And so that's been really difficult, like, for me to just navigate. Do you feel like when you became a parent that your relationship, like, struggled a lot with it when you.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

That exact same experience? Actually, I feel like there was just, like, a lot of life things that he and I had been through in, like, such a small period of time. And we were. The difference between us would be y' all been married for a while and then had a kid. We were only married. We hadn't even celebrated our first anniversary and had our child.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

So, you know, I. I do contribute some of it, a little bit to that, but it's so hard. And I do feel like it's so. So relatable that when you're dating, you are each other's world. Right. And all of the focus is on that other person. Like, Will hung the moon and my eyes. Right. And then when I had Jackson, it was immediately I gave birth to that child and my whole focus shift.

[Becky]

Yeah, it's. It's hard. It's like a really. And I don't. I don't blame Leah for that mindset shift at all. Like, I understand the challenges and the changes. Your body changes, your, like, emotions, your. Everything changes. Even, like. Like, if Leah was put in a situation of saving me or Bex, like, I know that she would choose him. Right. Like, that. Like, that's just. But, like, if I was in that situation, there's no one I would put above her. Right. Like, I don't care if I have 10 kids. Like. Like, that's just not how I feel. Like, I. Like, that is my person that is, like, I could not live my life without. Without her. And so it just. It's such. It puts so many unique situations into a relationship. And we've been struggling, like, a lot through it. I. We recently have been having really good conversations around, like, you know, it's been almost a year now. Vex will be a year in July, in June. And, like, asking her what more she needs from me. Me telling her what more I need from her. Because if we continued down the path that we were going down, like, there's no way that it would work. Right. Like, there's just no way it's sustainable.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

And it's having that conversation, though. And I. Because Will and I didn't. It was kind of like, this is just the way that life changes whenever you have kids. And I think that we both silently accepted it. Right. And we weren't having those conversations, which. Which ended up inevitably creating bigger marriage problems because it was unresolved and it became resentment.

[Becky]

Yeah. And that's exactly the words I used to Leah. I was like, I'm really afraid if we don't deal with this now that we're gonna reach a point that we can't come back from. And like, that's not the life that I want to be living with you. And so we had really good conversations and I think like, I can like feel the difference already, but it, I can't believe more, like how many people make it through having a kid. Just like being, it's, it is so hard. Like being a, being a parent is not hard. Loving Bex and being like, like wanting to give him a good life is not hard. But I just feel like when you have a relationship to mourn, it makes it so much harder. Like some people are having kids within toxic relationships or relationships that aren't really happy to begin with. And so like, maybe those are easier to withstand, like the disruption because you're just used to the chaos. But when you have like I had zero complaints about our relationship. Right. Like it was the most beautiful thing that I could have dreamed of. Of. And so when you have that, you're just like mourning so much of like, of it.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Yeah, well. And it's almost like you are preparing for it to some degree over the nine months. For sure.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

You know, like there's going to be change and it's inevitable there's going to be change. Thanks to Home Serve for sponsoring this episode. Home ownership is absolutely amazing until it's not. One minute you feel like you're sipping coffee and the next you are ankle deep in water from a burst pipe. And repairs do not care about timing and they definitely do not care about your budget. Trust me, I have been there. And I wish when I've gone through some of these issues, I knew about homeserve at that time. It would have been so helpful. Regular homeowners insurance usually does not cover a lot of the day to day wear and tear. So we're talking plumbing failures, H VAC breakdowns, electrical issues. You're often on your own for those. And that's where homeserve comes in. It is basically like a subscription for your home for as little as 499amonth and they've got your back. Like I said, repairs hit fast and they hit hard. And you could be searching for a contractor in a panic or you could already be on the phone with HomeServes 247 hotline scheduling a repair. It is super simple. You just choose a plan for your needs and your budget. And when something on your plan goes wrong, you just call their 24.7hotline to start the repair process. They've been able to help homeowners like you for over 20 years with a trusted national network of 2600 local contractors. I have literally had a washing machine come through my ceiling. I have had burst pipe issues and I now love that. I know about home serve. It is going to definitely come in handy with me being a single mom. You guys can help protect your home systems and your wallet with home serve Against Covered Repairs. Plans start at just 4.99amonth. Go to homeserve.com and find the plan that is right for you. That's homeserve.com not available everywhere. Most plans range between 4.99 to 11.9 month. Your first year terms apply on covered repairs. All right y', all, let's take a quick break to talk about Momentous. I know that most people think fiber is just about staying regular and that's what I actually thought too. But fiber actually plays a major role in energy, stability, recovery, focus and overall performance. And once you understand how gut health works, Momentous Fiber plus stops feeling like just another supplement and starts feeling foundational. Momentous Fiber plus addresses one of the most overlooked foundations of long term performance. Gut health and fiber is not just about digestion. It is a key driver of gut health which directly impacts nutrient absorption, energy stability, recovery, focus, mood and overall performance. And when gut health is not dialed in, other supplements and training habits don't work as well. So you could be doing everything else right. But without a strong foundation, results do fall short and fiber is oftentimes one of the missing links. That's why Momentous believes in a relentless commitment to fundamentals and doing them differently than they have ever been done. Fiber plus is built to support the entire gut health process, not just one piece of it. Momentous Fiber plus is a complete 3 in 1 formula with soluble fiber, insoluble fiber and prebiotic resistant starch. This combination is designed to support gut health from start to finish by feeding beneficial gut bacteria, improving digestion and helping stabilize blood sugar for steady energy without the spikes or crashes. If you guys are interested in giving Momentous a try right now Momentous is offering our listeners up to 35% off your first order with promo code Southern Tea. Head to live momentous.com and use promo code Southern T for up to 35 off your first order. That's livemomentous.com promo code Southern T. I Think the problem is, is nobody really prepares you for what that change looks like until you feel it literally variants you have to go through on your own. And I have said to Will so many times, I said, I think the reason that. That Will and I can be like such good friends is because we lost each other in having a kid. And when we finally just called it quits and divorced, our friendship never left. Yeah, it was just the, the physical relationship, the romantic relationship, that's what left. And so I think people all the time think, oh, wow, they have the craziest, like, wild it, why aren't they together? Type situation now Jackson's 13 and you're so right. Like, it's not hard to be a parent. What's hard is navigating the relational aspects within your home and where everybody kind

[Becky]

of fits a thousand percent. And you can't prepare. It's nothing you can prepare for.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Right. At all.

[Becky]

Well, I guess from a community, like, being open with communication. But even then, like, you know, Leah and I, it's been nine, 10 months and we haven't. We kind of just accepted it for so long, like, this is our new normal. And then finally I was like, this isn't my new normal. Like, this is not like my new normal. Like, I'm. I'm not happy living like this. Like, I. Things need to change.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Well, I mean, just think about it. When you bring a child into the world and you want to raise them properly, your whole focus shifts within one day, essentially, you know, and it's like, okay. Where you used to be able to just kind of like, pick up and go with Leah and do whatever you want. Like, okay, now we have bedtime, bath time, dinner time, all the things. And then by the time you get to your bedtime, you're so exhausted that you don't even want to touch each other.

[Becky]

Yeah. Literally.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Am I right?

[Becky]

No, for sure. A hundred percent. Yeah. Yeah. You're just.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

And it's like, okay, we haven't had sex in three weeks at this point. It's like, is this what marriage is?

[Becky]

Yeah. And like, I'm not like, really a. And we both have different needs, but we both show love and receive love in different ways. And so that was like a part of our convers. Like, I'm a physical touch person, so you remove that from my life and like, like everything around me is falling apart part. And not even in like a, like, having sex way. Like, it's could just be in like getting a hug. Like.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Yeah.

[Becky]

Having any type of physical contact. Right.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

But there is something so true. And I was talking to one of my girlfriends about this the other day. She has a. A little one. And she said, I am just. My relationship with my husband is in the absolute.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

And I said, well, what's going on? And she was talking about the way that people show love and how he always wants to be touched and be touching. And she said, I am out touched. Like, by the end of the day, I don't want to be touched anymore by anything else.

[Becky]

It's hard.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I can relate to that so much. I went through that when I had Jackson. I'm like, we'll actually get on the other side of the bed. And I'm putting a pillow barricade to make sure that you. Your feet don't even creep over here.

[Becky]

Dude, I would die if my foot didn't touch Leah at night. Like, it affects me. It like, literally drains the happiness from my body. But so I. Yeah. And Leah's like that. Leah's not really. Like, she is an acts of service, but, like, recently she's been trying to give me love through acts of service, and that's not how I receive love. And then she feels overwhelmed by doing too. Like, she feels like she's doing too much and I'm not doing. Doing enough. So it's a compromise on both sides. So luckily we've had the conversation. I'm not fearing divorce anymore.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

But that's a scary road, honey, when you start traveling it.

[Becky]

Yeah. Yeah. And because I look like, you know, like, I think back because we. We got married not that long ago, and I think back to our wedding day and just like, how beautiful that day was and how much love there was and all the things.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

It was like your dream.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Coming true, you know?

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

All of a sudden you're just like, thrown into thick of parenting and you're like smashing up peas and you're like, what the have I done?

[Becky]

And that's also what I said. I'm like, I do not resent having it. I don't. I'm not. Like, I don't wish we didn't have a kid. I don't resent him right now. But. But if things keep going the way that they are, I fear that I'm going to resent. Start resenting him soon because he receives your love and I do not. And like, I cannot live with that.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I will never forget when Will and I started having the divorce conversations. And I look back on it now and I'm like, we definitely should have divorced regardless of you Know what comes in my life in the future. He and I needed to divorce worse because stuff had gotten so heavy and so unresolved for such a long period of time that it's like once you finally try to address it, there's no walking that back. Like, the resentment's there. Two people don't like each other.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Get away from me. Your toes better not touch me. And I will never forget Will saying, you chose him over me.

[Becky]

Yes or no?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Yes, sir.

[Becky]

There's. There has to be. There has to be compromise. That's the only way to move forward with having a kid. There has to be a little compromise.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Do you feel like all of Leah's love goes to Bex? All of.

[Becky]

So the thing is, is that if Leah takes care of me, she takes care of, like, things in the house. Like, the house runs because of her. But, like, I think her physical attention goes to him. And that's what. Like, that's what matters to me the most. And so, like, in our conversation, I'm like, I will take over everything just to get you to, like, lay with me for 10 minutes a day. Right? Like, you know, like, that's.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I relate to this so much. It would be like, will, you're a psychopath. Like, but.

[Becky]

But I will, like. And after our conversation, I started doing little, like, things. Like, I'm going to take over doing, like, dinners and groceries. I've been, like, switching laundry intently. And from doing those things, she wants to love me more, right? Like. Like, it makes her feel more attracted to me when I'm taking things off her plate. So that's why I'm the load.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Like, the load of being a parent is so heavy already. And then you just add, like, all of the life obligations that you have to do to just have a functioning household. And then on top of that, dealing with the emotions from yourself and your partner. And also remember that, you know, Bex isn't even a year old. There's, like, some postpartum stuff.

[Becky]

I went through IVF twice in the past year as well. I had a miscarriage this year. So, like, there's just. It's just been like. So my levels of hormone levels have been, like, all over the place, too. But I've been moping, Like, I've been moping around my house for the past

[Lindsay Chrisley]

past, you know, what does that look like? Like, what is Becky moping look like?

[Becky]

Like, I'm just like a. Like, my. My mood is so consuming. People enjoy being around me because I bring typically, like, a positive energy. And unfortunately, Leah gets the other side of that. Right. So like, other people get that positive energy from me, but she gets when I'm upset or like, like just annoyed, pissed off. And I'm just like. And I, I'm visually just like, oh, don't like, talk to her like she's pissed. Yeah. And like Leah gets the brunt of that. I know that. And so like I. These past couple months and like going. I went through like a really bad depression this past winter too. And so like just going through all of this, I'm like, just so over it. I'm like, ready.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

And that's just a lot of emotionally, like, things going on.

[Becky]

Oh yeah. But I'm ready. I'm ready, you know, for what's next. I think I do have like, really like think that they're like something has switched. So we're on a better.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Are you or Leah passive aggressive?

[Becky]

I am. She is not. Leah's a sweet angel. Leah like, is. Is Liz. I've never been yelled at by her. I've never been like, she means well. Always has like my best interest. Her own best interest. Sometimes to a fault though that like, she believes in people too much so. But I am passive aggressive. I can be.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Oh yeah. Will and I both very passive aggressive people. There would be the moping around the house and no speaking, but just like eye cutting. Yeah, but you like a knife, you

[Becky]

know, literally, like she. The other day I was about to get shower and get ready for work and she's like, hey, can you like, put away your clothes whenever you have a chance? And it just annoyed me. I was like, fine, I'll do it right now. She's like, that's like, not my like, no. And so she sent me a picture later that day of our bed and it was only half made. And she was like, did you only make your side of the bed because I asked you to put your clothes away?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Why is this just so relatable? I mean, I can remember on weekends I would like spend all of Sunday or all of Saturday to. To clean the house. And like, this would be like deep cleaning. Because Will did not grow up with a house cleaner in his house.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

And in his mind he's like, well, I didn't grow up having that, so we don't need that. Like, yeah, we can do this. And I'm like, yeah, but anything that you do is not cleaning wise is not really to the, you know, caliber standard of what is going to transpire in this house. So me cleaning all day and he's Outside, like, doing yard work and chores. Chores and whatever. And I'm just like, oh, thanks for ruining my house. Like, he comes inside and he just stinks from outside. He's got grass clippings all over him. I'm just like, thanks for ruining my house. It's like, for what, Lindsay?

[Becky]

You know?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Yeah, like, for what? Like, for what business? Yeah, it's like, he's doing chores, I'm doing chores. But I'm like, my chores are more important than your choice. Your chores.

[Becky]

Yeah. You know, relationships are hard. Yeah. It's like our. Our, like, productive time is so different too. Like, I work 9 to 5, so I'm always like, my productive time is on the weekends. She's shift work, so her productive dime could be a random Tuesday. And that makes. We've had to, like, battle with that too, because if I get off work and she's being productive, like, I don't want to be productive, but then I feel like a piece of it just sitting there if she's being productive.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Exactly.

[Becky]

Yeah. But, like, understanding we can both have our own productive time at different times is big in relationships too, so it's so relatable.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Like, there is nothing worse, though, than feeling like you're just, like, a lazy sack of. And somebody else is doing something, and it's like, okay, what can I make myself look like I'm doing, but, like, I'm not doing, literally. Am I right?

[Becky]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

It's like, I'm gonna pretend like I'm fluffing this pillow over here. Like, what in the world?

[Becky]

Wait, wait, wait, wait. I just want to say, please listen to. For the haters. I just changed up the. The way that I produce the show. It is so freaking good. Give it a shot. Give it a listen for the haters. Wherever you find your podcast, that's it.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I saw some good feedback. Yeah, I saw some good. I'm excited for you.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Thank you. That's all we have time for today. If you have not subscribed to the show, you can do that from any podcast app. Wherever you get your pods. Always first at Podcast one. Hope you guys have a great week, and we'll talk to you soon.

[Becky]

Love you. Bye.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Pluto TV has thousands of free movies and TV shows. We're coming at you with everything we got. This is the mindset free. This is the mantra. The. With movies like Pineapple Express, the entire Star Trek film franchise, and Gladiator, and TV shows like Survivor, SpongeBob SquarePants, the Fairly Odd Parents, and Ghosts, Pluto TV is always free Pluto TV Stream now pay Never.

[Becky]

Do you even know what it's like to have a bff?

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Cause we sure do. We both never had sisters growing up, so we just decided to become each other others.

[Becky]

And some may even say we're a little bit codependent. But that's okay.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I feel like you should be. I'm Halie Kate.

[Becky]

And I'm Jazz.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

And we figured we were already talking,

[Becky]

so from talking 247 we figured why not have a public hour every single week and start a podcast.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

If you're looking for a podcast that you can listen to while you're getting ready to go out with your girls that feels like you're just on FaceTime, Delusional Diaries is the perfect stream.

[Becky]

From all of our traveling, to getting married, to being dog moms, to even our daughter dating stories of the past that still haunt us. There's a little bit of everything.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

So make sure you guys go stream Delusional Diaries anywhere you listen to podcasts every Thursday.

[Becky]

Book a loved by guest property with VRBO and you get a top rated vacation rental that's loved for all the right reasons like being in a great location or having great amenities.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Oh, I love my VRBO for the view.

[Becky]

Good reason.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Ooh, and the sauna. Sweet.

[Becky]

Another good reason.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

And that it's one of those good saunas with the hot rock thing. Ugh. Love a good hot rock thing. Fancy.

[Becky]

That's also a reason. Don't worry about surprises. Book a verbo you'll love with the love by guess filter if you know you verbo.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Honestly, I put off building a website way longer than I should have. Then I tried Wix Harmony and it was way easier than I expected. I just described what I wanted and I had an incredible looking website. The best part? I could change anything myself or ask my AI agent for help. I had everything my business needed right there. So if you've been procrastinating, this is your sign. Start building a website for free at wix.com harmony@great wolf Lodge, there's adventure for the whole family. You and your pack can splash away in the indoor water park where it's always 84 degrees. There's a massive wave pool, a lazy river, and tons of water slides for your pack to enjoy together. And the fun doesn't stop there. Get ready to explore and play at Adventure packed attractions from Magiquest, a live action game that takes place throughout the lodge to the Northern Lights Arcade. There's also a bunch of great dining options and complimentary daily events like nightly dance parties, all under one roof. And the best part, with 22 lodges across the country, you're always only a short drive away from adventure. So bring your pack together at a lodge near you. Book your stay [e-mail] and strengthen the pack.