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- [00:01]
A
Maybe I'm just, like, weird. Maybe I'm crunchy. This is the Southern Tea with Lindsay Chrisley. I think it's so funny when you get Christmas cards and all of these people write their children's accomplishments on the back. I don't love them. A Southern girl and a boy mom who's trying to navigate life while staying.
- [00:18]
B
True to her roots.
- [00:19]
A
I am a functioning, non functioning human being right now. Join Lindsay each week as she swears to spill the tea, the whole tea, and nothing but the tea.
- [00:28]
B
Tea, that is the tea.
- [00:30]
A
Here's Lindsay. Good morning and welcome back to another episode of the Southern Tea. Good morning, Kristen. How are you?
- [00:40]
B
Hello, Lindsay Chrisley. I'm doing fantastic. How about you?
- [00:44]
A
I feel like Kaylin Ray Lowry right now, all snuggled up in a blanket on a recording.
- [00:50]
B
What is your temperature right now?
- [00:52]
A
My body temp?
- [00:53]
B
No, like, outside.
- [00:55]
A
Oh. It was like 103 yesterday.
- [00:57]
B
It is like 100 degrees here. And I'm so afraid that I'm going to freeze my system. Typically, my house is set at 66 degrees, like all day, every day. And I started to get hot, so I got up and it was at 69. So I raised my temperature to 69, which I have a thing with odd numbers. I don't like them, so I don't set my shit at odd numbers at all. It's very weird. I do it with TV volume, car volume, whatever. So I set it at 69. Well, then I started to get hotter and I go and I look and it said 71. So I just keep upping my temperature along with how it's ra freezing because I'm so afraid it's going to freeze my system and, like, I can't not have air.
- [01:33]
A
That happened to me in our old house and we did not have AC for over a week.
- [01:40]
B
No.
- [01:41]
A
I thought Will and I were absolutely going to kill each other.
- [01:45]
B
There's something about it being really hot that really makes me agitated. Some people deal with it really, really well. I did find out. Let's pause there. Did you know that if you're taking an ssri, you cannot deal with, like, hot weather? Well, like, you physically don't feel well.
- [02:04]
A
What's an ssri?
- [02:05]
B
It's a serotonin. Let me not be a liar. It's something. It's a serotonin something. Reuptake inhibitor. Hold on. Yes, Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor. So it's a class of antidepressants that are commonly used to treat depression and other mental health conditions like anxiety. I Am on a low dose of one and have been for over 10 years for my migraines. It's like off label uses for that, which makes so much sense because I used to be fine in hot weather. Like, did I love it? No. Now. Oh, my God. Raging. I can't. I'm so. I'm like sweating. I can't stand it. I physically don't feel well. Like yesterday you called me. We were out running around doing a whole bunch of shit for the pool and I was so hot that I physically got ill. Like I was throwing up. My stomach was not well. It was bizarre.
- [02:56]
A
That's insane. So you can't go and like lay by the pool or anything in really hot weather?
- [03:01]
B
No, I go and I get in the pool. I have a whole system that's like, catch me in North Myrtle beach later this summer and I will be perched up on my pool step that gets me wet up to my chest and then I'm good.
- [03:14]
A
Oh, my God. Wait, I saw this TikTok and I did not know that you were supposed to do this. And I don't even know if it's true. Can't wait. But you know, like your outside units for your AC and shit. Yeah. Okay. This TikTok was saying that you're supposed to wash those like, like rinse those out with water seasonally.
- [03:32]
B
I have like a company that comes to, like, maintenance. It.
- [03:36]
A
Wait, why was no one telling me about this?
- [03:38]
B
I didn't know that. You didn't know that?
- [03:41]
A
Why would that be something that someone knows?
- [03:44]
B
Like, you know how you get your heater serviced, like annually?
- [03:47]
A
No.
- [03:48]
B
Okay. Yeah.
- [03:50]
A
What do you mean you get your heater serviced?
- [03:52]
B
Like, for me, we have oil heat, so we have like a heater system and they come in and they clean it all out and they do whatever they do to make sure there's no, like sediment and stuff within the unit. And then you're good to start using it. Like, I time it so that like before I turn my air on, the air gets done and then before my heater is time for that to go on and get that done. Okay.
- [04:14]
A
Well, this was like a DIY situation, which I probably should not be diying anything dealing with an AC or a heating unit. I just learned how to clean my. Or change, like my filters. Air filters in my house probably eight weeks ago.
- [04:32]
B
Okay. Okay.
- [04:34]
A
Will came here and showed me how to pull those bad boys out. And then he made me do one in front of him so that he knew that I knew how to do it.
- [04:44]
B
Oh. So it's. It's like the C1. It's like the, you know, that whole method of like, teaching. It's like, see one, do one, teach one.
- [04:52]
A
Yeah. And he said, lindsay, we are not married anymore and I cannot come and change your filters.
- [04:59]
B
I beg to differ, William.
- [05:01]
A
I'm glad you come and take a diarrhea in my son's bathroom on Saturday.
- [05:07]
B
No.
- [05:08]
A
Yes. And then just like left in there.
- [05:11]
B
No.
- [05:12]
A
I'm like, who. Whose ex husband comes to their house, takes a. In their son's bathroom and then just.
- [05:18]
B
Dips out, evidently yours.
- [05:21]
A
And then puts a fake rat in my refrigerator. So whenever I open it up, like, absolute jump scare.
- [05:27]
B
Oh, my God. Did you open it up when it was dark around you?
- [05:30]
A
Oh, yeah. Oh, I didn't open it until that night.
- [05:34]
B
Oh, my God. See, for a variety of reasons, this is why we need to get you indoor cameras.
- [05:40]
A
For a variety of reasons, this is why you don't have ex husbands.
- [05:44]
B
We already said what was going to happen to Corey, so.
- [05:47]
A
Oh, my God. So this weekend, worked on my porch, which I feel like porch projects have been going on for roughly 95 years at this point.
- [05:58]
B
Yeah.
- [05:59]
A
I am happy to say that my floor of my porch is sealed.
- [06:03]
B
Thank God.
- [06:05]
A
My stain on my railings have all been redone. And now I'm just waiting for it to cure for the 72 hours so I can get my furniture back on it so I can actually enjoy the porch that I decorated that I have not been able to use.
- [06:20]
B
See, I feel like it's gonna feel so good when you finally get to lake. Use it. And you're going to feel even better because you, like, participated in getting it ready. Correct.
- [06:29]
A
There is something to be said for doing projects around your house and not hiring those things out. You just feel so much better about it.
- [06:38]
B
I feel like I am in a polar opposite season of life. Like, I like to do stuff right, but I've always done stuff. So now, like, we paid someone to put up our pool. Cause I was tired of waiting, so I won that battle. So I paid someone to put up the pool. And I am such like a saver that I'm like, if it's something that I can do or I think that I can do, even like 1%, I'm.
- [07:02]
A
Gonna try to do it.
- [07:03]
B
I didn't feel like waiting. I paid for. I paid it. And like, we're doing the rest of it. I just paid for it to get physically put up and like the sand down. So, like, I feel good about that decision.
- [07:13]
A
I Have since divorce, I have, like, hired basically everything out because I didn't really know how to like, do handy stuff.
- [07:21]
B
Yeah.
- [07:22]
A
But I feel like I'm getting better at it. And I feel like when I actually do stuff, it's done better than when I hired it because it's mine.
- [07:33]
B
I wholeheartedly agree. I wholeheartedly agree. I like, remember when I was doing the floor laying project.
- [07:41]
A
Oh, yeah.
- [07:42]
B
And someone got hired to do the main areas of the floor that I now have to redo anyway because they didn't do it right. I did. My mom's room is pristine. Learned how to lay floor like a pro.
- [07:54]
A
I mean, I'm not going that far where I'm laying flooring.
- [07:58]
B
You could, though. You could.
- [08:00]
A
I'm just saying, I think that when it's your home and like your stuff, you care about it more than anybody else cares about it. Right.
- [08:07]
B
The level of investment is very different. Correct.
- [08:11]
A
And outside of that, I am happy to report that all of my packing for my trip will be complete tomorrow, a day ahead of time. And I do not know why packing stresses me out so bad.
- [08:24]
B
You and I get very stressed about going physically getting ready to go on a trip. We are very similar.
- [08:32]
A
It's just like there's so much work to be done to get to that point. And then you get there and half of the that you put in your bag, you're like, I didn't even need this in the first place.
- [08:42]
B
Yep. It's like overpacking. You're acting like you're going to a third world country where you don't have access to Instacart or any like, doordash, Uber eats, anything like that. I do the same thing. I go to the same place every single year. Every single year. I am distraught, crying hysterically until the point we leave the house, which is generally anywhere between 12:30 in the morning and 2:00 clock in the morning to start our little trek down. And I'm miserable.
- [09:12]
A
Oh, no, no, no, no. See, I talked to Will on the phone this morning and he was like, hey, what day are you leaving for your trip? And I said, on Wednesday. And he was like, yeah, but like, at what time are you leaving on Wednesday for your trip? I said, well, I mean, I don't really know, like an exact time that I'm leaving. I'm just leaving. And he was like, no, you just leisurely fudgeing, do everything. Like, I mean, I have no rhyme or reason for the reasons that I do stuff. It'll just be like, oh, Well, I woke up at this time, so I'm gonna take a shower. And that is my parents. Like they used to do that packing everything the day of. No, just nilly Willy. Wandering around the house, putting themselves together to the nines, packing up an Escalade, casually stopping at multiple restaurants on the way on a six hour trip. And that is me.
- [10:05]
B
Y' all have not lived until you're doing. No, no. This was like I learned my trips skills, like my road tripping skills from my parents. And it was like the car is being packed the night before because not a single soul is gonna sit there and argue at 2 o' clock in the morning.
- [10:24]
A
Yeah, but nobody's just getting up at 2am to like hit the road, ma'.
- [10:29]
B
Am. We literally leave because I have like, I know this drive like the back of my hand because I went to school there. Right. So it's like I did that at any hour. I didn't care what time. I left. One time I left at 7 o' clock at night. One time I left at 3 o' clock in the afternoon, 5am, 3am didn't matter. Like I had checkpoints that I wanted to hit by certain times because you know you're getting if you hit it any later.
- [10:55]
A
Oh no. I'm the type of person that knows that I'm getting and I don't care.
- [11:00]
B
Oh no. Nope.
- [11:02]
A
Like I will set my alarm to be up and act like I'm gonna be out the door at 9am and then 11:30 rolls around and I'm like, oh well, I gotta go get lunch somewhere now.
- [11:13]
B
No, my biggest thing, we're hitting the road. So like Corey takes off the day before we're gonna leave. Well, because he always used to work night shift. Now he's on days. So he goes to work, he comes home, he gets the car packed, he. We eat a light dinner, we try to go to sleep. I'm still frantically trying to find shit. So he's packed like all his shit is packed. That's pretty much where the fighting starts. Last year we literally fought to the point where we then laid down in bed at 12:30 at night, like a.m. and neither one of us could sleep because we were so hot and heated about fighting with each other because I was late packing and we left. We just left.
- [11:54]
A
That's also the benefit of having no one live with you.
- [11:57]
B
Yeah. Because I guess you're fighting with yourself.
- [11:59]
A
Yeah. And you're just frantically like roaming around your own house, pissed off at your own self.
- [12:05]
B
I mean, you had a Ball. When you planned your last trip, the packing videos that came out of that were exquisite.
- [12:13]
A
Oh, my God. Wait, can I show you this giveaway that I want to do on Instagram? Have you heard of these Labu. Boo. Like, keychains?
- [12:24]
B
I've heard Labubu. I have no idea who it is, what it is.
- [12:29]
A
They look like this.
- [12:30]
B
They look like fucking Teletubbies.
- [12:32]
A
You know what? Now that you say that, they kind of do. They scare me a little bit. But it's like a good scare. You know what I mean?
- [12:41]
B
That's what everyone's freaking out over.
- [12:43]
A
Yeah. These little keychains. And they have some online on different websites all the way up to, like, hundreds of dollars. The ones I found are 29.99. But I wanted to give some of these away. I think they're so cute, and I think they would be so cute on, like, a little clutch. I like to dangle it from it.
- [13:03]
B
I love. I love the giveaway idea. And if that's what it is, I. Great. I have no idea why I keep hearing about those. I don't know.
- [13:11]
A
Holy. Let me tell you what happened. So I cleaned out my garage this weekend, and I have been hearing flapping around in my garage for quite some time, and I'm like, what is that? Like, is it a snake on the wall? Like, what's going on? So I'm cleaning everything out. Mind you, I had purses in that garage that definitely should have never been in a garage. Like, why a purse would be in a garage, I don't know. It's like my unloading zone. But so long ago from my last relationship was the last time I used said collection of purses.
- [13:49]
B
Wow. Okay.
- [13:50]
A
That's how long these have been existing in there. So cleaning it out. Get my little Louis Vuitton. And I'm stacking everything now on the stairs to bring it into my house. I mean, I have outfits out there. I have handbags, like, all the things.
- [14:05]
B
You just didn't finish moving in?
- [14:07]
A
No, I didn't. Um. No. I think I went through a breakup, and I was just like, fuck this shit.
- [14:12]
B
Yep.
- [14:13]
A
You know? Yeah, this is just gonna stay in the garage. So I looked down in this bag, a whole damn bird's nest with eggs.
- [14:23]
B
I saw the picture of that, and I was like, what the hell transpired to get us here?
- [14:28]
A
Yeah. But, like, listen, that is the definition of a mom. Didn't have anything. And then, like, she wanted more for her babies. And a Louis Vuitton, you know?
- [14:39]
B
Yep.
- [14:40]
A
She scrubs the Amount of people that responded to that story on Instagram and was like, if you don't want that bag anymore, will you send it to me and send me their address? I'm like, I'm going to vacuum it out and I'm going to use it.
- [14:54]
B
Yeah, you're like, I just wasn't prepared for the bird's nest. But like, there were like a couple eggs in there. I think I saw three or four.
- [15:01]
A
Oh, there were definitely four eggs in there, if not more.
- [15:05]
B
But like, I guess for me I'm confused because it's summertime, but like, how.
- [15:09]
A
Does a know to find a Louis Vuitton bag and then just start making her nest?
- [15:15]
B
She said we're expensive. She said we're exotic. She's like Cruz.
- [15:21]
A
She absolutely did say that. Speaking of like birds, insects, those kind of things, did you see the stories that have been going around about these killer bees?
- [15:34]
B
No. I heard about killer bees last year. I thought we were on like a different thing.
- [15:37]
A
No. So I saw this article and it says killer bees keep spreading and killing across the U.S. it says Africanized honeybees, often referred to as killer bees, are now found in 13 states and slowly spreading northward, attacking people, livestock and pets along the way. In the last three months alone, a man mowing his property died after a bee attack. Three people were taken to a hospital and tree trimmers. The people that were taken to the hospital were from like a tree trimming situation. They disturbed a colony of these bees and had to run a mile to get away from them.
- [16:17]
B
I don't even know what I would do. I know that I used to like when I was in a pool, right, and the bee would come like at me, I would just go underwater. There were certain kinds of bees that would wait for me to resurface.
- [16:32]
A
My grandmother has a pool in her backyard and they had like a slide situation that bees would like get up underneath it. And if they did not check that situation, you hit that slide and you're gonna get swarmed.
- [16:51]
B
That's insane. Oh, that makes me think like now that I have a pool, I should probably check like that.
- [16:55]
A
But growing up I was always told like, as long as you leave them alone, they won't bother you.
- [17:01]
B
I think that's only honeybees, like regular.
- [17:04]
A
Ass honeybees that be pollinated, like even sting. I didn't think they had a stinger.
- [17:09]
B
They do, but like they only do it supposedly if provoked. And I'm like, well, what's your definition?
- [17:14]
A
And is it true that the bees that have A stinger, they can only sting one time in their lifetime.
- [17:21]
B
No. If I'm not mistaken, I think hornets or something and wasps, I think they can sting over and over and over.
- [17:27]
A
It says that as part of the west becomes warmer and drier, it's only going to get worse as the bees preferred climate moves northward. It says there's no national database of deaths related to bee stings, but in a 2023 study by center of Disease Control and Prevention found that on average, 72 people die a year from hornets, wasps, and bee stings.
- [17:50]
B
Do you want to hear a morbidly funny story?
- [17:52]
A
I mean, of course, because we have.
- [17:55]
B
Six senses of humor. So the day my dad died, like, he got stung by a bee and he was allergic, like, severely allergic.
- [18:03]
A
Did he die of a bee sting?
- [18:04]
B
Okay, okay, let's. We'll get into it. So when I was told that my dad died, I kept being told, like, a tragedy happened. He got stung by a bee. And I'm like, oh, my God, like, the beast took him out finally, because his doctor was telling him for years, like, you get stung one more time if you get stuck stung, like, chest up, you better have an EpiPen and be. And be praying, because you're very, very allergic. So I was just like, holy. The bees took him out. Then the coroner came and was like, no, he had a massive heart attack. And I was like, all right, but what about the B thing that, like, was that just like. Like, whisper down the lane gone wrong? No. So he did, in fact, get stung by a bee that day. So I have a whole theory in my head. The theory in my head of how my dad went out was he was outside on a very hot day cutting the grass. He and heart issues do not mix. He didn't know he had heart issues. I think he got stung by the bee and the adrenaline went up because, like, when you're allergic, like, the rush is crazy. I don't. You're not really allergic to much stuff. But, like, I know for myself, most important thing I can do when I get accidentally poisoned with, like, the nut allergy and stuff is I have to remain extremely calm because the faster, like, the more upset I get, the faster the reaction, like, happens. So I was like, that man got stung, had an adrenaline rush. It dislodged plaque, made him have a massive heart attack. So I still blame the bees.
- [19:32]
A
Kristen. I'm just not sure that a bee sting would, like, dislodge plaque.
- [19:37]
B
I don't know. Because if you increase your heart rate, it could so I don't know.
- [19:41]
A
I mean, that's a very interesting take. Yep.
- [19:45]
B
Nobody could answer me. The. The coroner. I was on the phone with the coroner, and I was like, is this possible? And he was like, I mean, yeah. I didn't look at it that way. I was like, that's scary.
- [19:55]
A
That's actually absolutely terrifying. I knew this one girl growing up that was, like, deathly allergic to bee stings, and she got stung at my grandmother's at home daycare in the summertime and thought she was gonna die.
- [20:10]
B
It's. I mean, when you have, like, an allergy to something like that, it's really. It's not good.
- [20:15]
A
Okay. So you know how we talk a lot about relationships?
- [20:18]
B
Yeah.
- [20:19]
A
I saw this video. It was Dr. Drew, and he was doing an interview, and it was titled the Truth About Open Relationships. And I know that Kale and I have different views on, like, I feel like you're meant to be with one person, not, like, your whole lifetime. Like, that's not what I'm saying, but, like, I feel like in a. A healthy and committed relationship, that one person and one. Like, you're two people made for each other. Right?
- [20:50]
B
Yeah. Like, you believe in monogamy, and Kale thinks that there's more than that. Correct.
- [20:54]
A
So Dr. Drew says that he has never seen open relationships work in his entire career. He said, the human cannot handle it. There are armies of professionals trying to help two people have a relationship. You think bringing a third person in is going to make that easier or better? No. If people want to do it, I don't have an objection to it. And he says, look at shows like Sister Wives, at how miserable everybody is. Everyone ends up miserable, especially the women. Intimacy. We are set up so it's between two people.
- [21:25]
B
I mean, for me, myself and I, I couldn't do anything other than monogamy.
- [21:31]
A
I think about Sister Wives all the time. I used to be, like, super into that show, just mainly because I thought it was so taboo. Like, how do they not just kill each other off?
- [21:42]
B
I'm going to have a very hot take on this one. What is the difference between Sister Wives with one husband and Hugh Hefner running the Playboy Mansion and having all the girlfriends?
- [21:56]
A
I don't think there is one. The only difference is, is that Hugh did not develop multiple family units.
- [22:04]
B
Yeah. He just didn't have kids with them.
- [22:05]
A
Yeah. So, I mean, do they call that a whoremonger?
- [22:10]
B
I mean, a lot of things, but they call sister. What the Sister Wives is based off of is, I believe it Is called plural families. And Mormon is. And the Mormon faith.
- [22:23]
A
I thought it was polygamy.
- [22:24]
B
It is polygamy, but I believe they're also Mormon.
- [22:27]
A
Yeah, they are more. They are all Mormon.
- [22:30]
B
And then it was referenced as plural families. Because I used to watch that show, like, because I was very intrigued by the dynamics. I actually watched it from before Robin, the third wife, came in to the family. And, like, truly, I felt like things were okay without Robin. Robin came in, and I don't know if she was just depicted like this on the show or if it's genuinely what happened with the family, but I felt like the third is what fucked it up.
- [22:59]
A
I mean, I think anytime you have more than one wife or one husband, like, you're signing up for too much.
- [23:05]
B
Yeah, 1,000%.
- [23:07]
A
And I could just never get behind. Like, I guess he went. Cody went around, and he had, like, sleepovers at each of their houses.
- [23:16]
B
Mm.
- [23:17]
A
On certain days of the week.
- [23:18]
B
Yeah.
- [23:19]
A
Like what.
- [23:20]
B
Mm.
- [23:22]
A
Could you imagine knowing? Because all of those women, the three wives, would know that if he was not with them, he was with one of the others.
- [23:34]
B
Yeah, I. I couldn't do it because that's, like, I don't know a single person that doesn't have jealousy, like, as an issue, jealous tendencies, anything like that. I just don't think that's human to not feel jealous. So, like, I could not get behind that. But what really bothers me is look at the differing ways that both men were looked at, Right? So you had Hugh Hefner, and you have Cody. And I think because they slapped a religious stamp on Cody, it was looked at very differently than Hugh. But for me, I'm like, it's the same shit.
- [24:10]
A
There is no way that, like, your mental stability is not severely affected by situations like that.
- [24:19]
B
No. I mean, literally, no.
- [24:21]
A
I'm like, how do you explain that to your kids? Like, you have all of these kids with these three different wives. Does the mom just say, oh, dad's at his other wife's?
- [24:33]
B
I don't know how you explain that, but I know that there have been various children that came from those relationships that have said, I would never live that lifestyle.
- [24:42]
A
I mean, I just don't think it's fundamentally functional. No.
- [24:46]
B
And then you look at it all the way down to the parenting. Right. So it's like, essentially all the women are. Are parenting as if they're single parents.
- [24:56]
A
Correct. And it also makes me wonder, if there was not a show, do we think that those relationships would have lasted as long as they did? Were they lasting because they were televised?
- [25:10]
B
I don't really know. Because you would think that it would have the exact opposite. Right. Like they say, like you have like the TV curse, right? You go on a reality TV show and you end up getting divorced. So I don't know.
- [25:21]
A
Well, I guess that's true. I guess the TV curse rings true in this household. No, I mean, I think I see it from a different perspective. Like, I think that TV could keep people together because if you're making all of this money, right, they're probably going to follow you way less or you're going to be like killed off the show if you're not participating in the way that you once were participating. So to me I'm like, there would be a greater. They're already in a fucked up situation. So wouldn't there be a greater reward for just staying in it to get your paycheck?
- [26:01]
B
Yeah, but at the, at what consequence? Your mental health?
- [26:05]
A
Well, I think that no one cared about the mental health from the situation they were in.
- [26:11]
B
Yeah, I would be so interested. I like want to hear more about the ones who left. I know their stories.
- [26:19]
A
I just wonder, people who are listening to this, like, how many people think that you can have a threesome relationship? What is it called? Like a throuple. Yeah. Do you think it can work? And how long do you think it.
- [26:35]
B
Can work and have you done it? Like, I'm genuinely. I don't condemn it by any means. It's just not for me. And I know that. But kudos to you if you can manage more than one. Because holy shit.
- [26:46]
A
Well, I guess, I guess to me, if that's going to. If you're going to be a throuple, then why not just like all be single?
- [26:55]
B
Yeah, I can see that too. Where you're like, why don't you just not commit?
- [27:00]
A
And is the throuple a situation to where they're like all doing stuff together or there's like one person in the situation that's just doing. That's doing stuff with the other ones? You know what I mean?
- [27:14]
B
Well, I think that's up to the boundaries, right? Like boundaries and rules that they set. Because it could be a situation where it's like when we can all do this together but nobody can ever do it one on one? I don't know. I really don't know. I think there's like different ways to do it.
- [27:28]
A
But could you imagine.
- [27:29]
B
No, no.
- [27:32]
A
Like the way that we would be on Dateline two hour special. Oh my God, I do have an update for you on the Travis Decker search.
- [27:44]
B
Please give it to me.
- [27:47]
A
So I don't have an actual update on the search efforts, but there was audio that was released regarding the custody situation. Okay, so it's newly released courtroom audio that reveals that he lost overnight custody prior to the deaths over concerns that the girls were sleeping in an armory under his watch. It says Decker insisted he took them to safe, paid campsites, according to the courtroom audio from September. In a quote, every time I've had the girls, we've been in campsites and national and national forest and paid campsites that have campers. We've never done anything that was unsafe or anything that I would want to put myself in. It said that he was homeless and he would sleep in his vehicle. Various different hotels, campgrounds. And that was according to police. In a quote, he said, I understand my current position when I'm by myself. It's not ideal, but my daughters are not part of that. He continued to say, I only get to see them over the weekends, and camping is something that the four of us have done since the three of them were in diapers. The judge was not convinced, resulting in his custody agreement shifting to visits every other weekend during the day. Okay, so.
- [29:12]
B
It gives more insight.
- [29:15]
A
I mean, I was. I was wondering exactly why, because we already knew that he was reported to be homeless and living out of a vehicle in different motels. And it also been said that he had taken the girls previously to a homeless shelter to stay, and then they were found at a nearby convenience store unsupervised near the homeless shelter. But none of that was said during the audio of this hearing. He also stated somewhere in this audio, because I listened to it earlier today, that there were times when he had overnights that he stayed with his ex wife. I just. I couldn't imagine a mom feeling comfortable enough to allow overnight visits. But. But I do also see his point. Like, if he was used to camping and the girls were used to camping with him, that that would kind of eliminate that fear.
- [30:15]
B
Like, they wouldn't know why they were camping.
- [30:17]
A
They were just camping because he said that was like a regular thing that they did. However, I know that a judge can't allow for a dad or a mom to be able to have children without a home to be able to go to. I just think that it's very interesting that this happened back in September, and then it had been reported that he was trying to reconcile with his ex wife. And during the time frame of him trying to reconcile with his ex wife, he took the girls lives.
- [30:53]
B
I, I still just don't understand the motive.
- [30:58]
A
Do we think that it was like a snapped situation?
- [31:02]
B
I mean, how do you snap and then. And then kill three of your children individually in, in the manner in which they were killed?
- [31:10]
A
Okay, so I did want to ask you that because to be able to put bags over three children's heads and zip tie all of their hands, how did not one of them get away? Do we think that he used something to like make them fall asleep?
- [31:30]
B
Like chloroform? Yeah, I don't know because I haven't heard that. There was like. They've put out quite a bit of information so far and we haven't heard that that was like found in their system or anything like that. I don't know if toxicology came back yet and I don't know if that's out, if I'm being honest. I don't know. But I don't know because it's like really sinister to think that they weren't asleep. I mean, the whole thing is awful.
- [31:52]
A
Well, I just don't see how you could possibly do that to three little girls and not one of them run or know what was going on.
- [32:02]
B
Maybe the only thing I could think of is maybe he told them they were playing a game, which is.
- [32:06]
A
Oh, I didn't think about that.
- [32:09]
B
My stomach's literally turning thinking about that. Like, maybe he did the zip ties before anything else. We're playing a game.
- [32:18]
A
I didn't even think about that. And I mean, you have to think with his military background, maybe they would have believed that.
- [32:26]
B
Right.
- [32:27]
A
The mom spoke at the girls memorial. I believe it was over the weekend. Absolutely heartbreaking. Like, could you imagine?
- [32:38]
B
I don't even have children and I.
- [32:39]
A
Can'T imagine three of your kids. And then also knowing that he has not been found.
- [32:45]
B
No. And the longer it goes on, I know a lot of people are like, oh, we're closer to finding him. The longer it goes on. I don't have that feeling.
- [32:53]
A
I feel like the longer that it goes on, the less resources are going to be used looking for him. And it's sad to say, but like, it'll be a news story until it's not.
- [33:06]
B
Yeah. Until the next thing happens and takes its place. And that is so sad. But that's the new cycle.
- [33:13]
A
It's absolutely terrible. Okay, I saw these two quotes and I want you to tell me if you agree with them.
- [33:21]
B
Okay.
- [33:22]
A
You can tell a lot about how, how you feel about yourself by the partner that you choose.
- [33:28]
B
I Feel like I agree with that.
- [33:30]
A
I agreed wholeheartedly with that. And it's crazy to think because I've obviously been publicly in situations, and it's like, looking back on those situations, I evidently was not in a great place with myself. Right. Like, you look back, hindsight's always 20 20, but you look back and you're like, well, you know, I can say until I'm blue in the face, they're this, they're that, they're the third, whatever. And those things might be true, but also, where was I mentally when I made those decisions? Right.
- [34:02]
B
Like, what place was I in? And there's a lot of times, even with friends of mine, that I'm like, the person that you picked to be with during the time you felt like X, Y, or Z was literally an outward example of how you were feeling inside.
- [34:17]
A
Yes. I mean, I can think. I'm not going to tell you, like, who these people were. I will tell you. One of them was more of a chase situation. Like, I liked him chasing me, and I liked a little bit of the toxic unknown. Do you know which one I'm talking about?
- [34:42]
B
I think so.
- [34:46]
A
The other one felt very safe and secure, but not vulnerable. Do you know which one that is? Why are you doing that? And then the other one doesn't matter. Like, whatever we go through, it just always circles back around that. It's like a possible life partner situation.
- [35:19]
B
Yeah.
- [35:20]
A
Do we know. Oh, you got him, right? Spot on, sister. The next one is if a man you were with walks in front of you, get out of the relationship, walks.
- [35:41]
B
In front of you, get. See, I don't agree with that, because either Corey does it for me out of protection, like, he will literally physically tell me if I'm walking on the outside of him in a parking lot. He will physically move me. And if I'm not paying attention, he'll be like, get the. On the inside. Like, he hates it.
- [35:59]
A
Okay. Two out of the three people that I have dated, if we're, like, walking on a road, like, where there's, like, busy traffic, they'll move me to the inside. I'm like, oh, chivalry is not dead. Like, we love this. This is a good sign. Until it wasn't. Then one of those people that I was with, I was like, you need to, like, walk in front of me. And he's like, no, I should be walking behind you. And I said, no, because I feel like it's a man's job to lead.
- [36:36]
B
Okay. I don't like it when it's Like, I think it's disrespectful when you're leaving someone, like, 12ft behind you. Right. Like, there is, like, a couple steps ahead I'm down with.
- [36:46]
A
Yeah, but aren't you usually, like, holding hands when you're in public?
- [36:49]
B
Usually, yeah. And Cory and I don't have that problem, but I have seen people, like, celebrities and stuff like that photographed, and it's like, there's a huge distance, and I'm always like, y' all are not. Well.
- [36:59]
A
Well, that means that there's probably a distance in the relationship. Right. Anytime I see a couple that's doing that, I'm like, oh, they actually hate each other.
- [37:09]
B
Yeah.
- [37:10]
A
But I prefer for a man to walk in front of me, not behind, and was also raised that way.
- [37:16]
B
Yeah. Like, my dad was always. He was never behind us.
- [37:21]
A
But is it safer from, like, a safety standpoint for someone to walk behind you or somebody to walk ahead of you?
- [37:28]
B
My parents used to, like, sandwich us, so I don't know. Like, my dad would go in the front. My mom would be bringing up the rear.
- [37:34]
A
Mm. I feel like that's a very, like, common, like, family thing, but relationally.
- [37:40]
B
Relationally, I would not want to be in front of Corey. No.
- [37:43]
A
It's, like, weird. I don't know how to do that.
- [37:45]
B
I get annoyed. I literally turn around, be like, what is taking you so long?
- [37:49]
A
No, I will stop, like, going into somewhere and be like, can you walk ahead of me? So I don't think that that is a deal breaker. I don't think that.
- [37:58]
B
No. Like, if they're leaving you in the dust, you. Yes, that's. That's a problem.
- [38:02]
A
But I would love to know what other people think and what the split is like, if. If it's a 50, 50 split. Walking in front or walking behind.
- [38:10]
B
Yeah. I'm curious.
- [38:12]
A
How about this? You know how we've been talking about religion quite often?
- [38:16]
B
Yeah.
- [38:17]
A
I don't know, like, why we have been doing it.
- [38:20]
B
It's. It. It all started with Noah's ark and the forbidden fruit.
- [38:24]
A
Okay. So apparently. Apparently, there was 88 children that were removed from a Bible study camp in Iowa as part of a human trafficking investigation.
- [38:39]
B
So they thought that the kids that were at the Bible camp were being human trafficked.
- [38:43]
A
Yeah.
- [38:44]
B
Holy.
- [38:46]
A
Yeah. So it's. So I pulled this article from New York Post, but that was not the initial article that I saw. Now, it's weird, because that link doesn't even work, but it says that police raided an Iowa church and removed 88 children participating in a Bible study camp as part of a sweeping human trafficking investigation. It says the youngsters are now in protective custody of local agencies after they were taken from this camp. It says deputies were executing a warrant and removed the children over. I think it was, like, a weekend ago. Maybe like the weekend before last weekend. And this was a part of a Methodist church. The photos, like, give me the heebie jeebies a little bit. It reminds me of that one documentary where all those people lived in that house and then, like, they bombed it or whatever.
- [39:42]
B
The people that lived in the house and they bombed the house. Wasn't it the LDS church?
- [39:47]
A
Yeah, Remember that one?
- [39:49]
B
Yeah. It was like a cult thing.
- [39:51]
A
Yeah, it was a cult.
- [39:53]
B
Okay, I know what you're talking about, but I. You mean. Wait, are you talking about Waco?
- [39:59]
A
Yeah, Waco.
- [40:00]
B
Okay. Okay. Yeah.
- [40:03]
A
It's kind of giving, like, a broke version of Waco.
- [40:07]
B
I'm so sick and tired of people preying on children. I don't know about you, but, like, I'm so tired of it.
- [40:15]
A
I know. And it says that they take them and put them in foster care, like, until this is all over, but it's like, there's no way, like, did none of these families know anything about any of this stuff that's going on? I just find it, like, so hard to believe that something, like, so crazy and sinister could be going on. And these people just think that they're sending their kids to this church camp?
- [40:44]
B
I don't think so. I think that parents definitely know it's. It's definitely giving, like, Provo Canyon, Paris Hilton type of school thing. Yeah.
- [40:54]
A
But it says that the family that was running the camp spoke to law enforcement and that they've denied all the allegations, which, I mean, makes sense as to why. Yeah, they would. But it said that none of the children were said to be in any type of, like, danger from what they could see. And quotes from people that I guess worked at said camp said that they had never harmed a child and that they had bought, like, they were talking about, like, one child specifically. So I don't know if that child, like, went forward and told. But it said that in a quote, he had never been harmed. They bought him, like, $400 worth of shoes, clothing, and everything else. And that the children aren't just studying the Bible, that they were also, like, having fun playing volleyball, soccer, doing other outdoor activities. And it said that the church was also known to be connected to help people find housing and stuff, too.
- [42:10]
B
What made them believe there was human trafficking involved? Or. We don't know yet.
- [42:14]
A
We don't know. Yeah.
- [42:17]
B
What do you think? Like, do you think there was or do you think they got it wrong?
- [42:20]
A
No, I think that it probably was. I mean, I just don't think something so sinister. I don't think that, like the law enforcement's gonna just go in and do something like that with 88 children, remove them if they don't have probable cause to be able to do that.
- [42:40]
B
I mean, if I would think the same, I would. I just feel like that's a lot of lives to disrupt for like a not provable claim.
- [42:50]
A
I also just wonder, like, I mean, I wish I knew more details. Was this like overnight camp? Because, you know, like, some camps are like an overnight situation. Some camps are just like day camps. It was not clear if it was an overnight type situation. I don't know.
- [43:09]
B
I want to follow that.
- [43:11]
A
I do believe that it was. One teenage boy reported something.
- [43:15]
B
Oh, okay.
- [43:16]
A
So it says that a teenager from Texas called authorities because he didn't want to be at the camp. And I just don't. I don't know. I mean, so obviously if that teenage boy called authorities, there was obviously some type of questioning and he gave information.
- [43:36]
B
That's what I was gonna say. Like information. Like. And you would think that they would have to corroborate before they go and shut down a whole camp and put kids in foster care. Like, that's not something that can easily be done. I don't know. I don't know. That's really, really tough. And I feel like we don't have enough information.
- [43:51]
A
Do we think a documentary will come out on that if it goes?
- [43:56]
B
Yeah. I mean, you remove that many kids from Bible camp? Yeah, I think so.
- [44:01]
A
Tell me how crazy, speaking of sinister, how crazy this shit is. This was from People magazine. It says, texas parents charged with a murder after a year when their four month old baby was found dead in a motel dresser.
- [44:15]
B
What the hell?
- [44:16]
A
Yeah, says that she was found in.
- [44:18]
B
A dresser drawer deceased.
- [44:20]
A
Yeah. And they weren't charged with murder until a year after this child was found.
- [44:26]
B
Remember we were talking about this, the Safe Haven baby box thing?
- [44:30]
A
Yes. That's what brought my interest to this. Because I'm like, why can't you just surrender your child? Like, why. Why put this baby in a dresser drawer?
- [44:41]
B
I don't understand. I don't understand people who do that or, or throw babies in dumpsters or trash cans or any of the horrific. I don't under. I physically don't understand.
- [44:54]
A
So apparently these parents Were living at the location where the baby was found in the dresser for over a year. And that baby was found unresponsive inside the dresser drawer where she reportedly slept.
- [45:07]
B
Slept.
- [45:08]
A
So I'm assuming that they were using that dresser drawer. I'm assuming it was larger in size. I'm guessing as like a crib.
- [45:18]
B
And then just what left. Like, I don't.
- [45:21]
A
But I mean, I do understand that, like, if they were using it as a crib and they were on hard times, you know, probably not the ideal.
- [45:31]
B
Right.
- [45:31]
A
Living situations, but the risk that's involved with putting a child in a dresser drawer, like, did they not think about that?
- [45:42]
B
I don't even know. Like, are you not better off co sleeping at that point?
- [45:46]
A
That, I mean, I, you know, I co. Slept for a very, very long time, so.
- [45:51]
B
And I know that they. What they say about co sleeping and stuff. So, like, I genuinely am asking, like, if you had to pick between the two, what is the safer alternative? To me, it would not be to be in a dresser drawer. I know.
- [46:04]
A
And it says that the maternal grandmother spoke to an NBC affiliate and said that she was relieved that charges had been filed and said that she repeated that authorities had found methamphetamines in the hotel room with the baby last year. And she also told the outlet that since the child had passed away, they had basically been living their lives like nothing had ever happened.
- [46:35]
B
So they have no remorse.
- [46:37]
A
Yeah.
- [46:38]
B
Okay.
- [46:39]
A
And then in another quote, she said they should have been charged with the drugs at the scene and held on those charges until the homicide charges were ready. And that's from the maternal great grandmother.
- [46:51]
B
How were they not held on drug charges?
- [46:54]
A
I don't know.
- [46:58]
B
What state was this in?
- [47:00]
A
In Houston.
- [47:02]
B
Oh, yeah.
- [47:03]
A
And she also said that she would like to see them spend the rest of their lives behind bars. She said that the granddaughter had allegedly told her that it was not the first. So this is the great grandmother talking to the news and her, I guess, granddaughter told her this information that it wasn't the first time that the couple put the baby in the dresser drawer and that they would shut her in there when they wanted alone time.
- [47:33]
B
Oh, my God, I'm literally sick. Also, I guess for me, if someone knew this was going on, why didn't they step in before the child passed away?
- [47:43]
A
I don't know. But I mean, in a lot of states, like, grandparents don't have rights actually prove something. And maybe it was a situation to where they couldn't prove it. Like, it's not illegal to live in A hotel?
- [47:57]
B
No, it's not, but at least report it. Like if you were told that information somebody was closing their child in a dresser drawer, would you not report it?
- [48:05]
A
Yeah, but as the story goes along, the reason that it was ever found that the child was in a dresser drawer was because a housekeeper had taken photos of the baby in the drawer and then reported it to their management.
- [48:22]
B
And then the management didn't do anything.
- [48:24]
A
It doesn't say if they did or not.
- [48:26]
B
It just seems like a lot of people failed that child and that's really sick and very disturbing.
- [48:33]
A
I just, I feel like I have known several grandparents that have been involved with their grandchildren, with negligent children that are parenting their grandkids. And in a lot of states they don't really have rights. Like in the state of Georgia, there are no grandparents rights.
- [48:53]
B
I don't know what grandparents rights are available in Pennsylvania. I'm not sure if they have any here.
- [48:59]
A
I wonder if it's like more common to have grandparents rights in states or not.
- [49:03]
B
Let's see what states have grandparents rights? Oh, all states in the US have some form of grandparent visitation laws, but the specifics vary significantly state by state. So it gets broken down by restrictive versus permissive statutes. Some states like Alabama and Georgia primarily allow grandparents to petition for visitation if the child's parents are divorced, separated, or 1, 1 or both parents have died. Permissive other states like Washington and Hawaii allow grandparents to petition for visitation under a wider range of circumstances. Often if it is, often if it's deemed to be in the child's best interest. It doesn't really give like a breakdown on what states have it, but it says the majority have some form a visitation, not custody though.
- [49:56]
A
I mean, I just don't understand. I guess if the parents knew that their children were living in a hotel with a baby, maybe there was just like no relationship and so they didn't know all of the details of the things that were going on. I don't know. I'm just saying if I was putting myself in a grandparents shoes and I knew that my child was doing something like that, it wouldn't be left up to the state because I would probably go to jail because I would just beat the door down.
- [50:26]
B
Yeah, yeah. Something would happen. Something.
- [50:30]
A
Right. Yeah. Speaking of crazy shit, we're going to do weekly tea. Oh, I saw this and this is insane. It says it started with a missing model. What police found in the soup pot was unthinkable and exposed a family feud. So this story is about this Hong Kong model that her disappearance led to one of the city's most shocking murder cases. And now two people have been convicted of helping her ex husband, one of the accused killers attempt to attempt a dramatic escape by sea. It says that she was initially reported missing in February of 2020. Three days later, her dismembered body was discovered in a rental home.
- [51:15]
B
Please, you said soup pot. So if you tell me parts of her ended up in soup.
- [51:20]
A
It says the additional remains were uncovered in the unit's refrigerator.
- [51:26]
B
Oh, no.
- [51:27]
A
Investigators also found raincoats believed to have been used during the crime. That's definitely given like Alec Myrdal, you know.
- [51:35]
B
Yep.
- [51:37]
A
It says that she had been killed and dismembered inside. It said that the ex husband, his brother and their father were arrested and charged with the model's murder. It says the 65 year old mother faces one count, one count of perverting the course of justice for allegedly misleading investigators. Like, why are all these people want her dead?
- [52:05]
B
I'm very confused, but I'm still waiting for the soup pot because I'm scared.
- [52:09]
A
Yeah. So it says that days after the body was discovered, the man had attempted to flee Hong Kong by boat. And it says that he had planned to escape via yacht. It says two people, a yacht rental agent and the guy who is allegedly being convicted for killing her. They were convicted on June 17. And it said that according to evidence presented in court, that there was like this whole escape route that was planned out and it does not give any details about like what soup was found. So I'm wondering if they're like keeping that as like private evidence for the trial. Maybe that's the only thing I can think. But like this was a beautiful, beautiful woman.
- [53:11]
B
Why the did they want her dead so bad?
- [53:13]
A
But like that's a lot of people to be involved. Like a lot of people, at least like five family members were involved in that.
- [53:22]
B
That's like we're not getting the whole story. That's what I'm figuring out.
- [53:26]
A
Well, I mean it seems so outlandish, but I'm thinking there was a divorce that was involved, which like I will never understand. Like people who want to get a divorce or are divorced, like why do you give a fuck to try to kill your ex?
- [53:45]
B
I just want to know, like right now, from anyone who's listening to this podcast, if you're divorced or if you're not, do you know five people that would want you dead? Because I don't. I know like three.
- [53:58]
A
Oh my God.
- [54:04]
B
It'S not five. It's it's definitely three.
- [54:07]
A
I mean, I could think of five people that would want me dead.
- [54:10]
B
Are you serious?
- [54:12]
A
Yeah. I mean, we're not.
- [54:14]
B
You know what? Oh. Oh. This is the same ones that were in my. I don't agree with number four.
- [54:33]
A
You don't agree with number four?
- [54:34]
B
No. Also unsure on number five. First three. Absolutely.
- [54:39]
A
Would you like to tell me why that you.
- [54:44]
B
I feel like there's a soft spot in there.
- [54:48]
A
Mm.
- [54:49]
B
And also a conscience, but whatever.
- [54:51]
A
I just. I need to know, like, about the soup.
- [54:56]
B
That. That's why I'm like, what that? Please. Like, my stomach can't.
- [54:59]
A
My stomach not giving us any information about the soup. And it's pissing me.
- [55:04]
B
How are you going to lead with that? Like, they really led with that.
- [55:07]
A
I know.
- [55:08]
B
They clickbaited you.
- [55:09]
A
Like, why did they do that to me?
- [55:11]
B
Get you to click.
- [55:13]
A
Well, yeah, I mean, I get that, but I'm just saying, like, could you tell us, like, what the soup looked like, like, where you found it? Was there body parts in there?
- [55:23]
B
That's what I was waiting for. The minute you said someone was dismembered. I said her appeared in the soup. She. They tried to feed it to someone.
- [55:30]
A
Oh, wait a second. I just found this. It says, prosecutor said that the slaying was a result of a bitter financial feud.
- [55:39]
B
Money makes people do crazy shit.
- [55:41]
A
I mean, but does it make you, like, dismember somebody's body?
- [55:45]
B
For some people, apparently, yes.
- [55:47]
A
Like, that's not normal.
- [55:49]
B
I mean, murdering someone isn't normal.
- [55:51]
A
But it also says that they're facing murder charges. And for the fam. Some of the family members, charges are, like, remain pending. There has been no trial date that has been announced, and People magazine tried to reach out for comment, and no one's been able to reach their attorneys.
- [56:10]
B
Interesting.
- [56:12]
A
Like, oh, wait, it says that there was an estimated hundred million dollars of family wealth.
- [56:19]
B
This is making more sense now.
- [56:21]
A
But have been divorced for eight years. So, like, would you have not have, like, just tried to off the person, like, way before then?
- [56:30]
B
I mean, you would think. But I'm also just like, why'd they have to go and dismember?
- [56:35]
A
I mean, that's a brutal crime.
- [56:37]
B
Yeah.
- [56:38]
A
Like, I mean, we're not talking, like, you know, just night night. You feel me? Yeah. And on that note, we have weekly devotional. Hey, Jesus, thank you for the gift of more time. I am so grateful. Help me be here fully present. And today you are working in every tomorrow. And you'll be there with me. Too slow. Me down. Tear down my pride. Remind my soul that change is good and help me receive it. Teach me how to process my emotions but not lead. But not let them lead. Replenish my strength. All is temporary, but you help me wherever I Whenever I forget how much I need you. Halt my spirit. Open my eyes. You are where life is. Goodness is who you are and what you do and what you give. Thank you. And I feel like I need that so much this morning because I have really been trying over the last couple of weeks to just pause and also ghost.
- [57:42]
B
You've been doing great.
- [57:44]
A
You're like, yeah, this is the time of life that we don't hear from you.
- [57:47]
B
Yeah. The sun comes out, Lindsay goes away. Yep.
- [57:53]
A
And then I'm just jet setting off to the beach. And then I conveniently let Krista know I'm not only going to the beach, I've now made this like a, you know, two for one trip. And we are going to Orlando, which.
- [58:06]
B
You'Re gonna have so much fun.
- [58:08]
A
You know, we have not done Universal park in Orlando. We've always done the Disney parks, but we did do Universal with my dad in Los Angeles a couple years ago. And Jackson loved it and so I wanted to take him to do the Florida version. And we're only going to be a couple hours away, so Will was like, yeah, run it.
- [58:33]
B
There you go. That's all you needed.
- [58:35]
A
So that's what we're gonna do. I think I'm going to go and get my nails done done because these are looking a little rusty crusty. If you guys have not followed the podcast on at the Southern Tea podcast on Instagram, make sure you follow us there. If you have not subscribed to the show, you can do that from any podcast app wherever you get your pods. Always first at podcast one. We hope you guys have a great week and we'll talk to you soon.
- [58:57]
B
Bye.
- [59:01]
C
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- [59:31]
D
Hi, I'm Adam Rippon, and this is Intrusive Thoughts, the podcast where I finally say the stuff out loud that's been living rent free in my head for years. From dumb decisions to awkward moments I probably should have kept to myself. Nothing's off limits. Yes, I'm talking about the time I lost my phone mid flight and still haven't truly emotionally recovered from that. There might be too many sound effects. I've been told to chill. Will I Unclear, but if you've ever laid awake at night cringing at something you said five years ago, congratulations. You found your people. Intrusive Thoughts with Adam Rippon is available now wherever you get your podcasts.