Straight vs. Lesbian Dynamics

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Southern Tea
Episode: Straight vs. Lesbian Dynamics
Host: Lindsie Chrisley (PodcastOne)
Date: March 25, 2026

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Overview

This episode of The Southern Tea centers on the contrasts and comedies of straight and lesbian relationship dynamics, co-parenting challenges, and the shared struggles of adulthood and homeownership. Lindsie Chrisley and guest Becky Hater (joined occasionally by Madison via chat) dive into deeply personal anecdotes, unfiltered listener voicemails, and lighthearted banter about everything from dating norms to laundry habits. The conversation is honest, conversational, and often hilarious, with major segments focused on relationship norms, home management mishaps, and the realities of modern parenting.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Southern Girl Life & Parenting Realities

• Technology Mishaps and Mom Life
  • Lindsie shares her ongoing struggles with technology, including lost TikTok passwords and charger saga with her son Jackson:
    • "He thinks he’s slick. He puts them in my bedroom to make me think I’ve got a stack of chargers and every single one that ends up in there, it’s because he's broke the cord." ([05:12])
  • Balancing career travel and parenting: "I don't like to lose my parenting time. So that means I have 48 hours to do something." ([06:51])

2. Co-Parenting & Exes

• The Ex-Husband Chronicles

  • Lindsie recounts a frustrating incident with her ex-husband Will about last-minute parenting schedule changes and travel plans:
    • "Ex-husbands are not advisable." ([12:16])
    • "I have a shared calendar... Why did you not put it on said shared calendar? What if I had a coochie wax on Monday that didn’t coordinate with the times I would need to be getting a kid out of school?" ([17:13])
  • Discussion on flexibility vs. strict adherence to co-parenting plans:
    • "We've kind of always just deviated from it. If it gets bad, we'll go back exactly to what it is." ([19:35])

• Co-Parenting Pets

  • The logistics and frustrations of sharing pet custody post-divorce:
    • "I'm not your wife anymore, so I'm not like, they're your dogs every other day until you need to go do something, and then you think I'm watching them." ([20:52])

3. Adulting & Homeownership Woes

• Home Maintenance Comedy

  • Losing the internet router, pressure washing disasters, and why everyone should get a homeownership manual:
    • "I cannot find my Internet router and he cannot find my Internet router. Is there a way to like ping it?" ([25:52])
    • "I almost severed a toe off. And then... I started spraying the wall because it had spider webs... Why did it make all my paint bubble on the wall and come off?" ([36:42])
  • Dreaming of living in a doorman-managed apartment like “Sex and the City”: ([32:22])

• DIY Mishaps

  • Lindsie’s adventures in “maintenance” include power-washing drywall and swapping home care stories with Becky, who admits she doesn’t know much more.

4. Relationships & Dating: Straight vs. Lesbian Dynamics

• Lesbian First Dates & The U-Haul Trope

  • Becky explains how lesbian first dates happen and why the infamous "U-Haul" stereotype exists:
    • "Let's start out by saying they probably know a lot about each other going into that first date. Because right after that first little swipe... they're texting 24/7 until the first date in 24 hours." ([56:00])
    • "First dates are long... it could start out with dinner and then sitting in a car for four hours or five hours afterwards." ([56:44])
    • "That's why the joke is like you bring a U-Haul to the second date." ([57:35])
  • Lindsie: "That is wild to me... I don't feel like straight people text like that, that early on because it's kind of like cat and mouse." ([56:44])

• Coming Out & Fluidity

  • Open, empathetic commentary about switching relationship orientations and societal pressures:
    • Becky: "I think it's easy to get caught up in what we think society expects from us... it's just all about people." ([63:42], [64:50])

5. Banter & Memorable Moments

• Showering & Personal Hygiene Habits

  • The contrast between Lindsie's luxury showers and Becky's five-minute “rinsey rinse”:
    • Lindsie: "My showers are insane. There's different kinds of showers." ([43:38])
    • Becky: "I use Old Spice as a three in one... I could settle with just using Old Spice." ([48:34])

• Perfume Overload & Teenage Scent Disasters

  • Lindsie describes her son overdoing cologne and her own adolescent perfume mishaps:
    • "You need to tell him that he cannot be putting on all this stuff. He smells like a nightclub." ([51:27])

• Laundry Division of Labor

  • The pain points of folding laundry and the joy of “master folders”:
    • "I sorted... and he folded. He's a master folder. I miss that laundry system." ([38:39])

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Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• On U-Haul Lesbians:

  • Becky Hater: “That’s why the joke is like you bring a U-Haul to the second date.” ([57:35])

• On Co-Parenting Frustrations:

  • Lindsie: “Ex-husbands are not advisable.” ([12:16])

• On Lesbian Dating Intensity:

  • Becky Hater: “They're texting 24/7 until the first date in 24 hours.” ([56:00])

• On Homeownership & Adulting:

  • Lindsie: “I had what I dubbed the divorce house. And then once I got comfortable with being divorced, then I moved here.” ([41:48])

• On Personal Hygiene:

  • Lindsie: “If anybody thinks they're getting in my bed dusty and crusty...” ([54:59])

• Listener Story (Voicemail):

  • AJ: “Every other night we would sneak to a park behind the school where we’d get it on in the back of this 2006 Volvo... Not only are me and hot hookup guy married now, but we also have a 10 month old baby girl.” ([66:22])

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Listener Voicemails: Stories & Solidarity

1. College Car Hookup Gone Right:

   • AJ shares a lighthearted and ultimately heartwarming story of sneaking around strict university rules only to get caught by the police—her hookup turned husband, and now they have a daughter. ([66:22])

2. Single Motherhood Through Crisis:

   • A South Carolina nurse recounts unexpectedly becoming a single mom when her husband went to prison, expressing empathy for Lindsie’s co-parenting journey and the different ways parenthood can be “single.”
     • "There’s all kinds of ways of being a single parent and ways of getting here." ([71:13])

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Practical Tips & Lighthearted Recommendations

• Dermaplaning is the Budget Beauty Secret:

  • Lindsie: “If I told people one service to go and get... the dermaplaning is the best like exfoliator.” ([74:15])

• Meal Prepping is More Fun with Friends:

  • Lindsie “mostly” lets her new assistant Hunter do the meal prep, and they share “anal talk” during the process. ([23:18], [43:43])

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• [05:12] – Charger/tech woes as a mom
• [12:16] – On ex-husbands & co-parenting
• [17:13] – Shared calendar & parenting logistics
• [19:35] – Parenting plan flexibility
• [20:52] – Co-parenting dogs
• [25:52] – Losing the internet router
• [36:42] – Pressure-washing mishaps
• [41:48] – Divorce house story
• [43:38] – Shower routines
• [48:34] – Minimalist shower products
• [51:27] – Teenage cologne overload
• [56:00] – Lesbian texting/dating dynamics
• [57:35] – “Bring a U-Haul to the second date”
• [63:42] – On relationship switching and societal expectations
• [66:22] – College car hookup voicemail story
• [71:13] – “There’s all kinds of ways to be a single parent” voicemail

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Tone & Style

The episode is raw, southern, and punctuated with humor even as it covers the realities of divorce, dating norms, co-parenting struggles, and the evolving definition of family and adulthood. The interplay between Lindsie and Becky is both friendly and teasing, offering comic relief and candid insight in equal measure. Listener stories provide moments of solidarity and inspiration, rounding out a show that feels like a lively group chat among friends who've seen it all.

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Summary prepared by The Southern Tea Podcast Summarizer – your go-to for in-depth, structured, and conversational recaps.

Transcript

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Okay, let's take a quick second to talk about Little Sleepies.

[Becky]

Because I have a girlfriend that is

[Lindsay Chrisley]

now expecting and I cannot wait to gift her some of these pieces from Little Sleepies. If you are expecting or you have a newborn, everyone suddenly has an opinion. You're going to get flooded with baby clothing recommendations. And most of them actually do not make your life easier once the baby's here. I wish that there was Little Sleepies around whenever I had Jackson. Little Sleepies was created by real moms who understand the real daily life with kids. Super soft, comfortable fabrics that actually hold up and fits up to three times longer than other brands. Their thoughtful details make everyday dressing and diaper changing a breeze. What stood out to me whenever I ordered this for one of my girlfriends was how soft the fabric actually was.

[Becky]

And I've heard from so many people

[Lindsay Chrisley]

that shop Little Sleepies that these products do not fall apart after every wash. And that is truly what matters. So if you're expecting or dressing little ones, check out Little Sleepies. You can visit little sleepies.com and use promo code goodnight for 10% off your first order.

[Becky]

Spring just slid into your DMs.

[Becky Hater]

Grab that boho.

[Becky]

Look for that rooftop dinner, those sandals that can keep up with you. And hang some string lights to give

[Becky Hater]

your patio a glow up.

[Becky]

Spring's calling, Ross.

[Becky Hater]

Work your magic.

[Becky]

Maybe I'm just like, weird. Maybe I'm crunchy. This is the Southern Tea with Lindsey Chrisley. I think it's so funny when you get Christmas cards and all of these people write their children's accomplishments on the back. I don't love them. A Southern girl and a boy mom who's trying to navigate life while staying true to her roots. I am a functioning, non functioning human being right now. Join Lindsay each week as she swears to spill the tea, the whole tea, and nothing but the tea. That is the tea. Here's Lindsay. Good morning and welcome back to another episode of the Southern Tea. Good morning, Becky.

[AJ (Voicemail Caller)]

How are you?

[Becky Hater]

Good morning, Lindsay.

[Becky]

Chrisley, Are you looking at me like that?

[Becky Hater]

You look great.

[Becky]

Thanks. Does my hair look blonder?

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, it looks good.

[Becky]

Yeah. I'm about to throw some 22s on

[Becky Hater]

it in two weeks, so my mind went to tires. I'm assuming you're talking about extensions.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Becky Hater]

Okay.

[Becky]

Length.

[Becky Hater]

I'm actually pretty proud of myself for

[Becky]

picking up on that 22 inches. The next time you see me, I will look like a mermaid.

[Becky Hater]

That's. That's a lot of inches. It is.

[Becky]

Are you an Alani girly?

[Becky Hater]

I am on whatever I can get my hands on.

[Becky]

Are you a girly at all?

[Becky Hater]

No, I don't. I don't think so. You know, I don't really rely on caffeine to keep me going.

[Becky]

I was just telling Madison last week that Alani came out with a new flavor called Lime Slush. And I'm not a fan of any of the slushes, but this one right here has a chokehold on me. It tastes like key lime pie, and it's so good.

[Becky Hater]

I'm not a big fan of lemon or lime flavored things, but I'd give it a shot.

[Becky]

It's.

[Becky Hater]

You should always try everything once, you know.

[Becky]

Okay, so let me tell you some tea.

[Becky Hater]

Okay.

[Becky]

Okay. So went to Dallas, recorded with Kale, recorded with Miranda from Secret Lives of Mormon Wives that aired after I got back from Dallas. So Madison's, like, trying to get the TikTok active and stuff like that. And so she's like, do you have the password to this? TikTok. TikTok password for that? Nowhere to be found. So after Kristin left, there were accounts that had two factor three factor two factor authentication on it. Started to realize that the two factor authentication was set up to her phone number. So I have tried to obtain certain passwords, certain things I was not able to get a hold of. So all of that to. To say, if you do not follow the Southern T on TikTok, go and follow it. Because I was not able to access that account.

[Becky Hater]

Starting fresh, that's frustrating. And it's a social media and stuff like that is so annoying. We dealt with a lot of, like, issues of getting the right account.

[Becky]

So wait, did I tell you the one time that I. I think it was Alessandra, it might have been Kayla. Went on Instagram and could see mine and Kale's location. They're like, you immediately need to turn that off. I did not realize that, like, that's how that kind of stuff followed. I thought you had to, like, update it.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Becky]

Like, you, like, you guys.

[Becky Hater]

You guys need guardrails in life and, like, people monitoring your. Every, like, movement. Every click of the computer needs to be approved by someone, I think.

[Becky]

Okay, well, let me tell you this morning about a computer. So I go to plug in my laptop because I'm like, you know, I've got to go in Kiki with Becky, go to plug that in. Nothing happens. Like, I press every button on this keypad.

[Becky Hater]

Okay.

[Becky]

Or is that what it's called? Keypad? Every button. Okay. I'm like, somebody broke my Fucking charger. And I know exactly who it is. It's Jackson because he breaks chargers and all the broken ones. He thinks he's slick. He puts them in my bedroom to make me think I've got, like, a stack of chargers and every single one that ends up in there, it's because he's broke the cord.

[Becky Hater]

Noted that that's what I have to look forward to.

[Becky]

It wasn't a laptop problem. I was literally googling, how quick can I get a geek squad?

[Becky Hater]

And you're here. You're present.

[Becky]

I found a new charger.

[Becky Hater]

Okay. You and technology are not friends, apparently.

[Becky]

We are not friends. I never want to be friends with technology. Actually told somebody this weekend. I said, if I could go back to, like, the pink, like, Razer flip phone or a Sidekick.

[Becky Hater]

I mean, you can. No one's stopping you.

[Becky]

Well, I mean, no one's stopping me. I'm stopping myself because I don't know that I could go back to. To, you know, like, where you had to, like, click three times to get to the letter.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Becky Hater]

That would probably prevent you from saying some unhinged shit because you, like, are like, I'm not even going to take the time to type this out. It's not even worth it.

[Becky]

Who says I do that?

[Becky Hater]

I. I know you do that.

[Becky]

You're like, I have seen the text.

[Becky Hater]

I literally have screenshots to prove it.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Becky Hater]

I come with receipts. Here.

[Becky]

There's one in one person in particular that if anybody ever logged into my icloud and got the backup of said text messages, the amount I would be like, on Crazy Bitch problems.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. Fair. You? Yeah, fair. How was Texas? Did you guys have a good time?

[Becky]

We did, but it was like a fly in, fly out type of situation. Wish I had a little bit more time, but I don't like to lose my parenting time. So that means that I have 48 hours to do something.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. I mean, fair. I mean, you have to balance both, But I wish I was there. I had a little bit of fomo.

[Becky]

Oh, you did?

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Becky]

Oh, Becky, wait.

[Becky Hater]

Can we pause for a second? You did not. I don't know if you know this about me.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Becky Hater]

But the biggest compliment you could give me is telling me that I look tan, and you didn't tell me that I looked tan.

[Becky]

I was just about to tell you. I was gonna say I feel like I'm a relatively tan person in life.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Becky]

But what I'm looking at right now is, quite frankly, a different ethnicity.

[Becky Hater]

This is Two days in the sun, girl.

[Becky]

How did that happen?

[Becky Hater]

I'm Greek, baby. I got that olive skin.

[Becky]

Remember when I messaged you over the weekend on Instagram and I'm just like, are you on spring break?

[Becky Hater]

The way. Wait. So I was. I've been in Florida the past couple of days. I went down to visit my sister just to take a little vacation. Re. A little winter reset from being in New Jersey, which is loved. Would needed. Lindsay messaged me and asked me if I was on spring break. And I, like, took me a couple seconds to like, think of how to respond because I was like, I don't. Am I on spring break? Like, is.

[Becky]

I don't know.

[Becky Hater]

I think you. I think people that use the term spring break have kids that are in

[Becky]

school because like, I think that you're absolutely correct. But I meant like adult spring break just with Bex.

[Becky Hater]

No, no, I was not on an adult spring break. Let me tell you this. I have a 22 year old niece. She is living her best life. She is doing everything that I did at her age. She is thriving. She is in Fort Lauderdale for spring break at the same time I'm there. And so she's FaceTiming me constantly, like showing me all the different. Like she's out partying and you know, it's her and her best friend and she facetimes me the one time and I'm like sitting by the pool. I was like, what's up? She's like, I'm just calling to let you, to remind you that you're old now and like pans and she's at like a club at 2pm like, everyone's in bathing suits. Everyone. Like the music is so loud. I was like, damn, I am old.

[Becky]

The only club that anybody will ever find me in is called Club Pilates.

[Becky Hater]

Oh, okay.

[Becky]

Yeah. Because it's just not the vibes for me. I'm not a people person like that. Never was a people person like that. Actually, one, the one time that I went to the club, I went with a fake ID and somehow I managed to get to like a vip and when I got up there, please tell me, please tell me how I was greeted with my parents hairstylist. And I'm like, oh, fancy seeing small world. Please don't open your mouth, man.

[Becky Hater]

I used to be a clubber. I used to be a what? Oh, girl. I used to be at clubs after parties, after clubs. I. I was crazy.

[Becky]

Do you want me to tell you what 36 looks like and why it's not a club and why I don't belong in one?

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, please.

[Becky]

Most exciting part of my weekend was me. You probably thought it was a pocket vibrator.

[Becky Hater]

I did.

[Becky]

I'm sure you did. It's very cutesy, right? Huh? A nose hair trimmer.

[Becky Hater]

Literally. Not even. I thought it was maybe like a ball you roll on your face. You have nose hairs that come out like that?

[Becky]

No, but I just feel like, okay. Every part of my body has no hair.

[Becky Hater]

Good to know.

[Becky]

So I'm like, all of quite the mental snapshots.

[Becky Hater]

But keep going.

[Becky]

All of the crevices, like, need to be pristine. So that includes my nose. I get on these fixation. It's a fixation.

[Becky Hater]

Okay. Yeah, I bet.

[Becky]

Let me back up. Let me tell you how this, like, even transpired. So I went to go and get a facial last week and like, when they do the dermaplaning to get all, like the. I think it's called, like, vellus hair off of your face.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Becky]

It inspired me. I'm like, now I need a nose hair trimmer. And who knows what other types of trimmers I will come up with.

[Becky Hater]

Okay. And did it work? Did any nose hairs come out?

[Becky]

I don't really think so.

[Becky Hater]

Okay.

[Becky]

I don't know how to clean it out yet, so I don't know.

[Becky Hater]

Give us a little preview. Put it in your nose.

[Becky]

This is why you need a man. Like, this is 36. Like, what is wrong? Okay. Let me tell you this story that really pissed me off and chapped my ass, like, over the last five days. Okay? Number one, just be so glad that you are a lesbian, okay? You do not have to deal with a man, okay? And by not dealing with a man, that means that you would never have an ex husband, right?

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Becky]

Ex husbands are not advisable. I am on my way to Pilates. Beboping down the road. I've gone, got Jackson breakfast, dropped him off at school. I'm on time. Will starts calling and I'm like, what could he possibly want? Like, he knows Jackson's already out of the car. So, you know, of course it's like, hey, how are you doing? It's because you want something. Like, cut to the chase. He's like, well, I think I might have to go out of town on a work trip on Monday and Tuesday, but I'm going to be gone till like, Thursday or Friday. I'm like, okay, you think? Or you know. And he's like, well, I think, but I'll. I'll let you know, like, when I know. So I just be bop through the rest of the week, go through my weekend. Sunday rolls around talking to Jackson on the phone and he's like, mom, you don't have to miss me that much anymore because I'm going to see you tomorrow. And I said, I'm gonna see you tomorrow. I said, it's your dad's day. He was like, no. He said he told you that you're getting me. I'm like, oh, okay. So I told Jackson, I'm like, hey, please go talk to your dad and tell him that he needs to give me a call because we actually did not have this conversation and he needs to give me a call. 10:30 by that time on Sunday night Rolls around still hasn't called. The Southern T Podcast is brought to

[Lindsay Chrisley]

you by Progressive Insurance.

[Becky]

You chose to hit play on this podcast today. Smart Choice.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Progressive loves to people make smart choices and that is why they offer a tool called Auto Quote Explorer that allows you to compare your Progressive car insurance quote with rates from other companies so you save time on the research and can enjoy the savings when you choose the best rate for you. Give it a try after this [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates not available in all states or situations. Prices vary based on how you buy.

[Becky]

All right guys, we're going to take

[Lindsay Chrisley]

a quick break to talk about bone broth because that is something that I have incorporated into my weekly life. I love Brodos Bone Broth so much. I have been using this when I'm meal prepping on Sundays. It is so good but also to just heat it up and reach for something that feels so nourishing and comforting. It is so good. This podcast is sponsored by Brodo. Welcome to the hottest trend in nutrition for the last 2000 years. Bone broth Bros. Bone broths are made from scratch. No concentrates, preservatives or shortcuts. So you get the best broth that money can buy. I have used the chicken and the beef one but I got got a whole package of the different flavors and they are so so good. Brodo makes bone broths that are delicious enough to drink. So each cup delivers whole food protein, about 10 grams per serving along with collagen, building amino acids, electrolytes and nutrients to support gut health, immunity, joints, skin and general wellness. All under 50 calories and with zero sugar or fat. Shop the best broth on the planet with brodo. Head to brodo.comt for 20 off your first subscription order and code T for an additional $10 off. Once again, that's brodo.com backslash T for 20 off your first subscription order AND an additional $10 off if you use my promo code.

[Becky]

T. I call him, and of course, I'm just reaming. I'm like, you have some audacity. This is why we are no longer married. You are irresponsible. My kid would have gotten off the bus and I wouldn't have known. Why do you need to go to Myrtle Beach? You took an outside sales job immediately when we got divorced. That's on you. He's like, whoa, Lassie. Like, whoa. Do you know how much satisfaction that I got yesterday when I go on his Instagram and see that he didn't get to get on his flight? He did not. He did not get to get on his flight.

[Becky Hater]

What am I looking at?

[Becky]

Well, specifically, you're looking at. It says that he has a flight delay by 59 minutes. Then the next one is your flight is delayed by another 100 minutes.

[Becky Hater]

Why are you getting updates on your phone on his flight?

[Becky]

Oh, I got another way to get it. I don't have to get it on my phone.

[Becky Hater]

You know, the whole time you're telling this story, I'm like, huh? You know, it's not really the ex husband that scares me. It's the ex wife. Okay.

[Becky]

But here's the thing, and I. I'm bringing all of this up to say, oh, the last one was a 34 minute delay. And then I hear call Jackson. And so of course I'm eavesdropping. My custody schedule says I can't, but.

[Becky Hater]

What is wrong with you?

[Becky]

But I do. I mean, it's on speaker. You know I live here. Yeah. He's like, oh, I'm actually on the way to my parents house. Ha ha. That's what you get. That's what you get for not telling me what you're supposed to be telling me. Also, I have a shared calendar. So, like. Like, why did you not put it on said shared calendar? What if I had a coochie wax on Monday that didn't coordinate with the times that I would need to be getting a kid out of school? And it just like, pisses me off. And I need to know if anybody else deals with this because it has to be common.

[Becky Hater]

I mean, I'm sure it's absolutely common, but I don't know if you're. Never mind. I'm not even gonna get down that. Go down that path.

[Becky]

Go down the path.

[Becky Hater]

I was like, I'm not even sure. Like, you guys argue like you're still married.

[Becky]

Somebody else actually told me that Yesterday they were like, what I just heard sounds like a lover's quarrel, literally. And I'm like, for what business did you have? Like, this is the exact tone for what business did you have. Taking an outside sales job, knowing it's going to inconvenience everybody.

[Becky Hater]

What, like, what triggered you into this? Because it's not the scenario. I'm like gonna act like your therapist now. Like, there's some underlining frustration that you're just taking out on poor Will.

[Becky]

What triggered me into this was because this has happened multiple times and it's the same scenario every time. So if I don't lay down the law and trigger him, he's gonna keep triggering me. So I've got to trigger the trigger.

[Becky Hater]

How finalized are those divorce papers?

[Becky]

Pretty final. We're almost going on five years in July.

[Becky Hater]

All right, well, seems like you and Will have some co parenting things that you need to work out. I would assume that it's pretty common. But you guys are. Do you guys have court ordered co parenting stuff?

[Becky]

Yeah, we did it all legally, but I can't remember the last time we followed the court order.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. So I think everyone's probably scenario is a little different. I'm just. I don't know many people that co parent. Well, my sister does kind of. Well, her kids are older now, but like the only other person is Kale. And that's all I have insight into in co parenting.

[Becky]

Well, some people follow like the co parenting parenting plan orders to a T. Yeah. And I'm like, there's two sides of it. Life can't just operate like off of a piece of paper as normal humans. Like, stuff comes up. So we've kind of always just like deviated from it. If it gets bad, we'll go back exactly. To like what it is. But then I see people who follow everything to a T. And then they don't have the same issues.

[Becky Hater]

Well. Cause some people have to follow it to a T. I mean, they're dealing with someone that like, well, you'll give them an inch, they go a mile.

[Becky]

I'm like, it literally cost me $500 to drive my Bronco through your front door.

[Becky Hater]

Lindsay, are you okay? Are we okay?

[Becky]

No. I'm so pissed.

[Becky Hater]

So what happened? He get. He gets to his parents house and what?

[Becky]

And then he boarded his flight today, but still he was inconvenienced and I'm glad he was okay.

[Becky Hater]

Well, he got a little bit of karma to him, you know, so we had to drive.

[Becky]

He had to drive to his parents twice. Because I also now refuse to keep the dogs because I'm like, It's just too much like.

[Becky Hater]

Wait, hold on. What? You guys co parent dogs, too?

[Becky]

Okay, so we had one in the marriage, okay? And he was adamant that he was gonna keep her. And I'm like, well, technically, I don't really think that's fair, but, like, whatever. I'll just put it in the parenting plan. Okay, so we did that. Well, then we got Georgia, and Will kidnapped her from me. So he has the dog most of the time, but when he travels, he's like, you're watching the dogs? And I'm like, actually, I'm not your wife anymore, so I'm not like, they're your dogs every other day until you need to go do something, and then you think I'm watching them. So I told him after this last time, I was like, the dog in the crate. I don't like cleaning up dog. I don't. I don't want to be a part of any of this. This is inconvenient. And I know I sound like such a. Like, I get it.

[Becky Hater]

Fair.

[Becky]

But at the same time, if I go out of town and I want Oliver to be watched, I have to pay for somebody to watch him. So, like, what makes it any different? I like to call this tit for tat.

[Becky Hater]

Tit for tat. Yeah. You guys, you know, I would give advice. You don't take my advice. I've never been in this situation. I never really know what's going on in your life. And so this is just a really great insight into your relationships.

[AJ (Voicemail Caller)]

Mm.

[Becky]

It's.

[Becky Hater]

It's fascinating.

[Becky]

And then there's another relationship situation that I'm currently dealing with that I'm like, do I just drive my car through my own front door?

[Becky Hater]

How much would that cost?

[Becky]

You assume the $500 for the deductible, and then also whatever claim on the homeowners. Yeah, like, I. I literally can't. But you know what I did on Sunday? I meal prepped.

[Becky Hater]

You did?

[Becky]

Yes.

[Becky Hater]

Okay, can I. Can you give. The last time we talked, you were hiring an assistant. Can you give me an update?

[Becky]

Yes. Well, when I say I meal prepped, mostly Hunter meal prep.

[Becky Hater]

Okay.

[Becky]

I. Okay, I Kiki'd around.

[Becky Hater]

What does that mean?

[Becky]

What does kiki around mean? Yeah, means, like, I don't know, Madison, what's the definition of Kiki?

[Becky Hater]

She said hang out.

[Becky]

To hang out. She said, wait, I missed all of these messages. She's like, we also have a new Facebook page. Oh, here we go. I'm actually crying.

[Becky Hater]

So Hunter started. How are things going?

[Becky]

Oh, my God. So well. And you know what's like, really nice about it? The access to me is now. Like, if I don't want somebody to have access to me, they don't. That's why you need a gay best friend.

[Becky Hater]

So is. Do I get to meet him eventually?

[Becky]

Oh, yeah. And like, you would love him. We actually over meal prep, we're talking about anal.

[Becky Hater]

Okay.

[Becky]

And I was asking, like, how that really works in the gay community because I don't really prefer to do it. And I'm like, how does it not hurt? And he gave me all the tips and tricks. It's like, that's the type of person you need in your life.

[Becky Hater]

Noted. Taking like all while cutting vegetables, taking notes. What did you guys meal prep?

[Becky]

What we meal prepped was chicken and rice and vegetables. And what's that kind of bowl called? Egg roll in a bowl. And then I did. I. He did a chickpea salad.

[Becky Hater]

I love a chickpea salad.

[Becky]

Oh, my God, it's so good with tzatziki and then like some chicken. And have you used that Japanese barbecue sauce from the grocery store?

[Becky Hater]

No, I have no clue what you're talking about.

[Becky]

Do you go to the grocery store?

[Becky Hater]

No.

[Becky]

So is that a Leah job?

[Becky Hater]

No, we just order. I live in the middle of nowhere. We wait.

[Becky]

All habitual uber eaters?

[Becky Hater]

No, we don't have places that deliver here. So that.

[Becky]

How do you get your groceries?

[Becky Hater]

We get Walmart delivery. Walmart's like 35 minutes away. And so we do it like every so often. I'm. I'm an eat to survive kind of person, you know?

[Becky]

You know what? I am too. However, this last situation that happened to me on specifically Valentine's Day almost wiped me off of the face of the earth. And as if I already wasn't tiny enough, I just bedrotted for so long that I basically drifted away.

[Becky Hater]

So I'm like, you were. The wind took you?

[Becky]

The wind took me, baby. So I'm like, you know what? I need to really get this stuff in order. I need to meal prep on Sundays and by me, Hunter needs to come and help me do it. Because I don't really know how to do that kind of stuff. But I learned so much whenever he was doing it. I'm like, oh, that's how you put that together.

[Becky Hater]

He sounds like a great addition to your life.

[Becky]

He absolutely is. And he's keeping everything in order around here. But let me tell you, I cannot find my Internet router and he cannot find my Internet router. Is there a way to like ping it? I found like the.

[Becky Hater]

What is going on with you?

[Becky]

I found like the expanders or whatever they're called.

[Becky Hater]

Like the extenders.

[Becky]

Yeah, I found those. Okay. I do. I cannot locate the router. We have looked all over my basement. We've looked all over like the cabinets. We've looked everywhere. It is nowhere to be found.

[Becky Hater]

Like, typically you can find like the inter, like the external point where it comes through your house.

[Becky]

Okay.

[Becky Hater]

And so maybe you could follow the lead there. Do you have an attic access?

[Becky]

I'm not good at following directions. Yes. Oh, I didn't check the attic.

[Becky Hater]

I doubt that the router would be in your attic, but you would be able to find maybe the, like the ether.

[Becky]

The Ethernet.

[Becky Hater]

Ethernet cable.

[Becky]

Yeah. Well, what an issue to have.

[Becky Hater]

How big is your house?

[Becky]

It's missing. Like, I don't know.

[Becky Hater]

I mean, did you. Let me. Okay, let me take two steps back. Did you buy or build this house after your divorce? Like, are you the only adult that's lived here?

[Becky]

Yes.

[Becky Hater]

Okay.

[Becky]

I should not be the adult living here either.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. I'm like, this is a situation. I've never heard anyone have the issue. Like, I couldn't find my septic one time. But like, you're like, you should have like a modem and things somewhere.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

I love Haya vitamins so much. I actually just had a call with Will and I said, you need to get on the highest subscription so he never runs out at your house. If there is something that keeps me up at night, it is parenting. I know that our kids are the first generation growing up on ultra processed foods and the long term effects, we are only beginning to understand them. And that is why Haya exists. Some children's vitamins on the market today contain up to 7 grams of sugar per serving and are stuffed with artificial additives and petroleum based dyes. But Haya took the opposite approach. So we're talking zero sugar, zero gummy additives, and just clean nutrition. The crazy thing is kids actually love them. They love the, the taste, the experience, all of it. And Haya is different because it is so thoughtfully designed. They looked at what modern kids are actually eating or not eating, and then they formulated around those specific nutritional gaps. Here is also something that every parent needs to hear. If getting your kids to eat vegetables feels like an impossible daily battle, highest kids daily greens plus superfoods is a total game changer. It's basically like chocolate milk stuffed with veggies. It is a greens powder that is packed with 55 plus whole food sourced ingredients. Just mix one scoop with milk or a milk alternative and watch them actually enjoy something that they're secretly fueling their growing bodies. We were able to work out a special deal with Haya for their best selling children's vitamins receive 50% off your first order to claim this deal you must go to HA Health.com Southern Tea this deal is not available on this deal is not available on their regular website. Go to H I Y A H a l t h.com Southern Tea and get your kids the full body nourishment that they need to grow into healthy adults. Okay, let's take a quick second to talk about Little Sleepies because I have a girlfriend that is now expecting and I cannot wait to gift her some of these pieces from Little Sleepies. If you are expecting or you have a newborn, everyone suddenly has an opinion. You're going to get flooded with baby clothing recommendations and most of them actually do not make your life easier once the baby's here. I wish that there was little Sleepies around whenever I had Jackson. Little Sleepies was created by real moms who understand the realities of daily life with kids. Super soft, comfortable fabrics that actually hold up and fits up to three times longer than other brands. Their thoughtful details make everyday dressing and diaper changing a breeze. What stood out to me whenever I ordered this for one of my girlfriends was how soft the fabric actually was.

[Becky]

And I've heard from so many people

[Lindsay Chrisley]

that shop Little Sleepies that these products do not fall apart after every wash and that is truly what matters. So if you're expecting or dressing Little ones, check out Little Sleepies. You can visit little sleepies.com and use promo code goodnight for 10% off your first order.

[Becky Hater]

This podcast is brought to you by Progressive Insurance.

[Becky]

Fiscally responsible financial geniuses, Monetary magicians. These are the things people say about

[Progressive Insurance / Pluto TV / Other Advertisers]

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[Becky]

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[Progressive Insurance / Pluto TV / Other Advertisers]

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[Becky]

Visit progressive.com to see if you could save on car insurance, Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states or situations. All right y'.

[Becky Hater]

All.

[Becky]

Did you know that three out of four US Homes have toxic chemicals in their tap water? Even though contaminated water looks clear, it could be putting you at risk for devastating health concerns including fatigue, hormone disruption, cognitive decline, and even Cancer. And surprisingly, standard fridge and pitcher filters do little to remove most contaminants. And bottled water contains mic plastics.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

And that's why I'm going to talk

[Becky]

to you guys about Aqua Tru. It is a countertop water purifier tested and certified to remove 84 contaminants including chlorine, lead, forever chemicals and microplastics. Its patented four stage reverse osmosis system goes way beyond ordinary filters for pure, healthy water that you can trust. You guys can join the 98% of customers who say they're drinking water is cleaner, safer and healthier. This is your sign to go to aquatru.com now for 20% off your purified buyer using promo code Southern Tea. Aqua True even comes with a 30 day best tasting water guarantee. That's aquatrue.com A Q U A T-R-U.com

[Lindsay Chrisley]

promo code SOUTHERN Tea.

[Becky]

Becky, there are some people who are meant for like full blown homeownership.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Becky]

I had this conversation with Kale one time. I'm like, I need a fancy like

[Becky Hater]

apartment where like there's a doorman and like things are taken care of for.

[Becky]

I'm thinking like sex in the city.

[Becky Hater]

You know, it never watched it, but yeah, can pick up.

[Becky]

It's kind of the life that I need to live. Oh yeah. I also told somebody and by somebody. I'm not going to tell you the somebody, but I told somebody that I was relocating and like I completely made it up.

[Becky Hater]

What is wrong with you? Wait. I always, I think about this. I live in a, in a pretty complex house and there's like a bunch of things that you're supposed to do. It's not that complex. But like turn. When you live in a place that has multiple seasons, there's things you need to do to like season proof your house. There should be like. And there probably is. I just haven't looked it up. But I feel like there should be a service where it's someone that comes and tells you everything you need to do yearly. Everything you need to do like every five years, right? Like empty your septic. Empty, like change the filter in your air conditioner, like get your furnace, you know, reviewed or whatever it's called. I feel like we need like a little bit more guidance on like you should do that.

[Becky]

Kayl and I were talking about how we were going to do a business where we were going to put together like parenting plans for people. I mean, we'll probably get sued.

[Becky Hater]

Don't even talk. Do not say a sick. You And Kale are going to put together a parenting plan for people.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Becky Hater]

You two are gonna teach people how to parent. Yeah. Okay. Just wanted to make sure that I heard that properly. Go on.

[Becky]

So we're like, okay, well we can do this like PDF version. Like it can be like a whole service for like anything we've been through, anything we paid for illegally. We'll doctor it up a little bit. People can, you know, it's kind of like think in the world of matchmakers. Okay. Yeah. But what we're doing is helping people create havoc in somebody else's life.

[Becky Hater]

It's like, how, how do you. Like, it's like a co parent plan. Like,

[Becky]

Can you imagine? But then I feel like you could be a part of.

[Becky Hater]

I want no part.

[Becky]

You can be a part of this business. We can have another arm of it where it's like, like homeownership.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. I don't want a part of that. I don't know. I'm telling you, I don't know how to do it. I guess I could learn, but no,

[Becky]

like the home ownership part of like all the problems that you've had and you're going to create a PDF of like what people need to do at like certain times of the year. It's going to be a full blown service and it's like, call Becky Hater.

[Becky Hater]

Thank you for thinking of me. I'm out.

[Becky]

Wait, but to your point, there should be like some type of manual for homeownership.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Becky]

Based off of your geographical location. I feel like, because everywhere is different. Like I'm not going to be doing the same thing if I know it probably is.

[Becky Hater]

I just haven't looked it up and I could honestly use AI to tell me now.

[Becky]

Okay, well, please tell me why. I go by what's the things that like sit outside, like raised up, up, like next to your house and it has the fans on them.

[Becky Hater]

They're like your AC unit.

[Becky]

I don't feel like there would be two. Would there? I mean, they look exactly the same side by side.

[Becky Hater]

Yes. Your AC unit.

[Becky]

Okay, well, it needs to be pressure washed.

[Becky Hater]

It needs to be cleaned. Yes. Yes.

[Becky]

Is that H Vac?

[Becky Hater]

Yes.

[Becky]

But how do you get the dust off the outside of it?

[Becky Hater]

There's dust on it. It. On the outside of it. Outside.

[Becky]

Yes, Dust on the outside of it. Outside. But it just looks like grungy.

[Becky Hater]

It definitely needs to get cleaned.

[Becky]

But do you call a professional, like an H VAC person, or can you just spray the pressure washer down in there?

[Becky Hater]

I don't think you should do that. I think. Did you already do it?

[Becky]

No, I didn't already do it, but can I tell you what I did one time? Oh, and then I'll tell you about something else. So this one time, I had never pressure washed in my entire life, but I was like, clearly it couldn't be that hard in the process of me pressure washing. This one time, I was wearing flip flops. I almost severed a toe off. And then I started spraying the wall because it had. What do you call those things that spiders do? Spider webs. It had spider webs on the wall. So I'm like, I'll just shoot that pressure washer up there and get it. Why did it make all of my paint bubble on the wall and come off?

[Becky Hater]

Say that again.

[Becky]

Why did it make my paint bubble on the wall and then come off?

[Becky Hater]

Where did you prep? Where was this?

[Becky]

In my garage, on the walls. It's not this house, so it will be something.

[Becky Hater]

Walls aren't waterproof. You're not. You're not supposed to to. To spray drywall like that.

[Becky]

Why not? How does it get clean?

[Becky Hater]

You need to use a rag.

[Becky]

Oh, that's too much.

[Becky Hater]

You can't like pressure wash drywall.

[Becky]

Well, I did. And all the paint, I don't know like how it scientifically happened.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, you. Are you okay? This is so hectic.

[Becky]

You're like, like, Lindsay needs a full time man in her life because this is honestly.

[Becky Hater]

I need your assistant to listen back to this episode and like, take notes of things that he needs to take

[Becky]

charge of for sure. Another thing that I'm currently dealing with is do you ever, like, put too much in your washing machine and it gives you that error code?

[Becky Hater]

I'm gonna be honest. I do not that do laundry.

[Becky]

What?

[Becky Hater]

I don't do laundry.

[Becky]

Who does it?

[Becky Hater]

Leah.

[Becky]

She does all yalls laundry. Yeah, See, that's kind of why I miss David. Because we had a good laundry system that was going where I did the easy part of it and he did the hard part.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Okay.

[Becky]

So I sorted and washed and put in the dryer and then he folded. He's like a master folder. I will show you pictures of like stuff that he has folded that's like still at my house.

[Becky Hater]

I. I don't need pictures. Thank you though.

[Becky]

But like, no, everybody needs pictures of this because it's like, not normal. And I miss that laundry system a lot. But I couldn't, I couldn't imagine like being in a marriage and my husband or wife doing like the whole part like, that's so lucky.

[Becky Hater]

I help fold and I help put away.

[Becky]

Oh, the putting away. What's the worst part of laundry? Like, from the start to finish, I

[Becky Hater]

think either folding or putting away, it's

[Becky]

definitely foldering or putting away, but it's definitely putting away.

[Becky Hater]

The putting away is what is. Is because it triggers a snowball effect of I have too much. Where am I supposed to put this? And then it's just like, I'm just. I have a cycle of wearing the same things now. And it's just I have so many clothes that I don't wear. I'm. That I'm selling my house and I'm starting fresh, leaving everything here.

[Becky]

You just told me that I was crazy when I said I'm relocating, but I'm really not. And you just said the exact same thing in a different way.

[Becky Hater]

Okay, well, maybe we are cut from the same cloth in certain ways, Lindsay.

[Becky]

So do not come for me because I did not send for you.

[Becky Hater]

I can't. I can't get over that you power wash your walls.

[Becky]

I don't. Well, evidently I wasn't thinking.

[Becky Hater]

Can you power? Am I wrong? It's not recommended.

[Becky]

No. Is that what it says? Do not recommend it.

[Becky Hater]

There's. If it can force border into walls, then. Which means there's a mold risk. Well.

[Becky]

Well, it's not that much water. It's just like a.

[Becky Hater]

Did you power. Did you power wash this past weekend?

[Becky]

Yeah, in my garage.

[Becky Hater]

Oh, that's the scenario. I thought you just said it's a different house.

[Becky]

No, in a different house. I did that to the walls. But I'm saying I worked on my garage more this weekend. I had already started it, but then there was just like some small areas that I was not just like, wasn't as pristine as what I was looking for.

[Becky Hater]

Okay.

[Becky]

So I did that. I did not get to my back porch and I did not get to my side porch because it was raining most of the weekend. And I'm just not trying to do that in the rain.

[Becky Hater]

You get wet anyway when you power wash. What does it matter?

[Becky]

No, you don't, Becky.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, you do.

[Becky]

Do I need to take a power washing video and like what it looks like? Could you imagine? Literally?

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. Like just maybe I just come. Come down to Georgia and we'll do like a. A house. A house cleaning weekend. And I'll find your.

[Becky]

With a fresh blowout and a little fabletics outfit. And I'm like, I'm really doing the most.

[Becky Hater]

I'll be in my like, flannel shirt with a hammer on my hip.

[Becky]

Wait. But to answer your question, this is not my house from when we divorced. I had what I dubbed the divorce house. And then once I got comfortable with being divorced, then I moved here.

[Becky Hater]

Did you buy the divorce house or did you rent the divorce?

[Becky]

No, I bought the divorce house.

[Becky Hater]

Logical. Makes sense.

[Becky]

Why is that not logical?

[Becky Hater]

Let me ask you a question.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Becky Hater]

I have in my notes to ask to talk about this because I forgot that this happened, and thank God I wrote it down. Do you often pick up your phone when people call you in the shower?

[Becky]

Yes.

[Becky Hater]

Like, there's no, oh, I'm showering. I'll call them back. It's like, hey, yeah, I'll answer and. And say hello.

[Becky]

Yeah. Because I'm just like, what if they need me straight away? Like, what if y' all were recording karma and chaos and y' all need to ask me a question?

[Becky Hater]

What was I calling you for?

[Becky]

I don't know, but I know that you were at Elliot's play. I think we were just talking.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, I think I just missed you. And I was like, oh, let me give her a call. Oh, no, you called me.

[Becky]

Did I call you?

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, you called me.

[Becky]

You called me.

[Becky Hater]

No, you called me, and you were in the freaking shower, and I was like, are you in the shower right now? You're like, yeah, I'm like, you just call people from the shower.

[Becky]

Let me get them nudes, girl. No, but for real, I will talk to my grandmother in the shower. I talked to my mom in the shower. I've talked to you in the shower. Talked to Kale in the shower. Have had business meetings in the shower.

[Becky Hater]

Fascinating.

[Becky]

Like, comment down below.

[Becky Hater]

If you. If you call people from the shower.

[Becky]

My best work is done in the shower. Okay, honestly, like, I. I have talked about contracts in the shower.

[Becky Hater]

How. How long do you shower for?

[Becky]

Are we talking hot girl shower? Are we talking, like, a little rinsey rinse?

[Becky Hater]

I don't know. How long do you shower for?

[Becky]

My showers are insane. There's different kinds of showers.

[Becky Hater]

Like, what kinds? Fill me in.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

There is so much noise around weight loss right now. We're talking trends, opinions, medications, and it's hard to know what is actually right for you. Reaching your weight loss goals doesn't have to mean completely changing the way you live your life. What if you could make healthy progress with a treatment plan that includes medication, access to 24. 7 support, nutrition tips, and tools for tracking movement, hydration, and sleep, all personalized to go at your pace, and that is weight loss by hers. Through hers you are connected with a medical provider who determines if treatment is right for you. If prescribed, your treatment plan is personalized to support you in reaching your goals. HERS goes beyond medication by offering access to ongoing care, dosage and medication adjustments as needed, lifestyle and nutrition Tips and access to 24. 7 support. They even offer the convenience of 100 online care with licensed providers on the other side who learn your story and create a personalized plan to deliver healthy progress that you you can maintain. So no more yo yoing just steady results. Turn to HERS for comprehensive personalized healthc care that you can count on. From weight loss support to growing thicker hair, easing anxiety to navigating menopause symptoms, even accessing convenient lab testing, HERS is going to have you covered. Feel like your best self again? Visit for hers.com Southern Tea to get a personalized affordable plan that gets you that's f o r h e r s.com southerntea for hers.com southerntea weight loss by hers is not available everywhere. Prescription required. See website for full details, important safety information and restrictions Owning a home is so amazing until it's not. One minute you are sipping coffee and the next you could be ankle deep in water from a burst pipe. Repairs do not care about timing and they definitely do not care about your budget. Regular homeowners insurance usually does not cover a lot of the day to day wear and tear. So so anything like plumbing failures, H vac breakdowns, electrical issues, you're often on your own for those and that's where HomeServe comes in. It is like a subscription for your home for as little as 4.99amonth and they've got your back. As I said, repairs hit fast and hard and you could be searching for a contractor in a panic. I have been there. Or you could already be on the Phone with home serves 24. 7 hotline. Scheduling a repair. It's so super simple. Just choose a plan for your needs and budget and when something on your plan goes wrong just call their 24.7hot to start the repairs process. They have helped homeowners like you for over 20 years with a trusted national network of 2600 local contractors with 4.5 million customers, a 4.8 out of 5 post repair rating and an A plus BBB rating. They are the real deal. To help protect your home systems and your wallet with HomeServe against covered repairs, plans start at just 499amonth. Go to HomeServe.com to find the plan that is right for you that's homeserve.com not available everywhere. Most plans range between 4 to 11.99amonth. Your first year terms apply on covered repairs.

[Becky]

Okay, so one version of shower is I wake up and I'm going to do school drop off, and then I'm going to Pilates. So I get in and I wash my body off, like, my pits and bits and my face, throw all my workout clothes, leave the house. When I got home from Pilates today, I had my hair done yesterday, so I didn't need to wash that. So it was kind of like a quickie too. But I still shaved my legs, so that was pretty. Probably like an added five minutes. If I'm doing an everything, like, all things shower, washing hair, doing leave in conditioner, all that, that's probably about 35 minutes.

[Becky Hater]

Okay.

[Becky]

All right.

[Becky Hater]

I take, like five minute showers every time I shower.

[Becky]

Is that washing your hair too? Yeah, that's not possible. Can you put it on a timer and send me the screenshot?

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Becky]

I know you're lying. Lying?

[Becky Hater]

I'm not lying.

[Becky]

Like, who? This is not even appropriate for me to ask this question, but, like, how do you shave, like, everywhere?

[Becky Hater]

Well, when I. When I don't shave, every time when I shave, it takes me longer. Like when I have my shower that I'm, like, committed to shaving in.

[Becky]

Madison said, do you use a two in one?

[Becky Hater]

So, funny enough, I don't use a two in one, but sometimes I do put my shampoo and conditioner at the same time. But why?

[Becky]

It's a. If it comes in two bottles, that means it's two processes.

[Becky Hater]

Sometimes I just don't feel like two processes. I just do it all at once.

[Becky]

Becky, I need to take a photo of my shower and, like, my products and all this stuff that I use in there. And you're gonna be like, absolutely not.

[Becky Hater]

I use old. I. I could settle with just using Old Spice as a three in one.

[Becky]

Old Spice is like such a throwback.

[Becky Hater]

Oh, it smells. I'm like, smells so good.

[Becky]

Oh, let me tell you. So do you remember, like, when you were growing up and you started wearing perfume or cologne?

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. Thanks for the inclusivity there.

[Becky]

Actually, did you wear perfume or cologne?

[Becky Hater]

I think early on when I wore perfume. I wear cologne, though now.

[Becky]

What perfume were you wearing? Trying to pick up the vibes.

[Becky Hater]

Cool water, blue bottle.

[Becky]

What brand is that?

[Becky Hater]

It is David off Cool Water. Wow, that triggered so many memories.

[Becky]

Okay, so I was a Juicy Couture original flavor scent wearer or Dolce and Gabbana light blue.

[Becky Hater]

Okay. Both good.

[Becky]

Both very good. Clean smells. I would get cussed out on the way to school because it's like you're trying to kill us all on this car by the amount that you're using. So I would just then pack my bottle of stuff so I could spritz myself however many times I wanted to when I got out of the car. You know how people say, like, karma is tenfold? Like, it's gonna come back and get you for the things that you did growing up?

[AJ (Voicemail Caller)]

Up.

[Becky]

Yeah. My son gets in the car and it smells like a nightclub.

[Becky Hater]

Does he wear at least just one kind or is it like spray? Or is it like.

[Becky]

Because we are going from Dove Spray deodorant, which smells like its own cologne.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Becky]

And then what is that cologne called? Aqua to Geo or just Aqua Geo.

[Becky Hater]

This?

[Becky]

Yes. That's what he wears.

[Becky Hater]

That's what I wear.

[Becky]

I didn't just pull that out so fast.

[Becky Hater]

Well, fun fact, I accidentally ordered. I accidentally ordered after shave instead of cologne. So it's sitting here because I need to return it.

[Becky]

That's hilarious. So it's that and then every product that is in his bathroom, like. Like if he uses any type of, like, texture or something that has its own scent. So we're talking like a collection of scents by the time that we get to the car. And you know, me being the mommy that I am, I'm like, I can't say anything to you, but I have gotten a call from my ex husband, like, when he started driving him to school, and he's like, you need to tell him that he cannot be putting on all this stuff. He smells like a nightclub.

[Becky Hater]

I mean, you should tell him. You should look, teach him how to pro, like, properly use cologne.

[Becky]

I asked him to show me the process of what he does.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Becky]

Because I feel like that's a nice, like, gentle parenting way of like, fair. Not you smell like. But how are you doing this? Six words. I'm like, no, like somebody with your tiny little body, you need no more than two. And that might be pushing it.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, yeah.

[Becky]

Now he has a little method that he does. He like walks through one, and then sometimes the neck gets it and sometimes the hands get it. We just. We don't know what day we're gonna do.

[Becky Hater]

At least he cares about his hygiene.

[Becky]

Listen, okay. Were you ever a kid that hated to brush your teeth?

[Becky Hater]

I don't remember. I don't think so. I was a kid that didn't like

[Becky]

to shower, but not, oh, you were stinky.

[Becky Hater]

Becky. No, no. I like, I like, naturally, like, don't smell. Like my hair doesn't get greasy. Like, I don't.

[Becky]

Like, you're not a smelly one.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. So even like. And then like in summer I would, like, just jump in the pool instead of showering.

[Becky]

How much is too much requirement for showers for a teenage boy?

[Becky Hater]

I don't know. Because, like, teenage boys smell and it's

[Becky]

weird because it's not like a B.O. smell. It's like you smell like a wet dog or like you've been outside for an extended period of time smell.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. So like, like, is there a way that you, like, train your kids to like, not like, like be a. Like, not. Not want to shower and not. Not want to brush your teeth?

[Becky]

We have the teeth brushing issue in this house, but I have never been that person. I like to brush my teeth as many times as I possibly can. Like, I eat a meal if I'm at home brushing my teeth. Like, I have those little fake toothbrushes in the car. You know what I'm talking about? Like the.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Becky]

Yeah. Console using them.

[Becky Hater]

I. I'm like a morning brusher. I like, can't start my day without brushing my teeth.

[Becky]

Same. That's the first thing I do every day.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. Leah's not. Leah can like, drink coffee and like, start her morning without. Yeah.

[Becky]

Like there, there needs to be nothing else in this mouth after what probably germs do. Just collected over the nighttime.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. I don't know if you're listening and you've figured out a way to. I need to learn it for when my kid gets older.

[Becky]

It's. It's habit forming. But it's hard also whenever you're co parenting. Because I'm more of like a. I'm going to ask nine times if you did it until you do it. And Will's like, I'm asking one time and if you don't do it, I don't care.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. Like, I, I don't know. Where does the, the pushback come from? Like, is brushing their. Like, why?

[Becky]

I don't know. But the showers. Like, he has always showered since preschool in the morning and at night before bed. And I feel like that's, that's sufficient.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, I'm a. I'm a morning shower.

[Becky]

You are?

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. Like, I'll go to bed dirty. Yeah.

[Becky]

Oh.

[Becky Hater]

Oh.

[Becky]

You would send me to another orbit. Because if anybody thinks they're getting in my bed dusty and crusty.

[Becky Hater]

I knew that about you. Like, I'll, I'll wake up like yeah. I'll go to bed in the clothes I, like, wore all day.

[Becky]

Wait, do you remember that one time that we were in LA and you got on the bed with your shoes?

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, I do.

[Becky]

And I was like, wait, what? Yeah, like, you probably just walked over dog and all kinds of stuff. Like, like, yeah, I'm just like, I'm

[Becky Hater]

not that kind of person. I like, I can sleep anywhere. I'm not, you know.

[Becky]

Okay, I have a lesbian question for you.

[Becky Hater]

Okay, let me put my lesbian hat on.

[Becky]

Does it ever leave?

[Becky Hater]

Sometimes.

[Becky]

What's a normal first date for a lesbian?

[Becky Hater]

Like, place wise?

[Becky]

Well.

[Becky Hater]

Well, lesbians, let's just start out by

[Becky]

saying, how long is the date? And like, what's the date?

[Becky Hater]

Let's start out by saying they probably know a lot about each other going into that first date. Because right after, right after that first little swipe or meeting, they're texting 247 until the first date in 24 hours. And in that 24 hours, they know just about everything there is to know about each other. The first dates are much. Oh, yeah, the first dates are long. It could start out with dinner and then sitting in a car for four hours or five hours afterwards. Like, whatever the first date is, it's going to be like a half day, full day thing for sure.

[Becky]

Okay. That is wild to me. I don't feel like straight people text like that, like, like that early on because it's kind of like cat and mouse, you know, it's like, I don't want you to think I'm more interested in you than you are. Me?

[Becky Hater]

Nope. I'm getting. You're getting all the details. But I, I mean, I feel like even now when I meet people, not even like who I'm dating, I'm asking a million personal questions because I'm like trying to get to know someone.

[Becky]

But is that more of a lesbian thing or is that more of a Becky thing?

[Becky Hater]

I think it's more of a female thing thing. Like female and fe.

[Becky]

Like, oh, female to female.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Becky]

Okay, Madison, chime in.

[Becky Hater]

In the chat, do you agree, as another fellow lesbian. Yes.

[Becky]

She's like, woman of many words.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. Lesbian first dates are long. That's why, that's why the joke is like you bring a U haul to the second date.

[Becky]

Wait, what?

[Becky Hater]

That's the joke? Yeah. Like, what do lesbians bring to a second date?

[Becky]

A U haul.

[AJ (Voicemail Caller)]

All.

[Becky Hater]

You start dating, it's like they're. They're like, they're talking 24 7. They're together as much as you can be or a a long distance is a big lesbian thing too and but you're talking like 24 7.

[Becky]

Okay so just to give you like a different parents. Wait, Madison says U Haul lesbian is a common LGBTQ stereotype and cultural trope, referring to the tendency of some lesbians move in together or commit very quickly, sometimes after the first date. Famously joked about is running a U haul truck immediately. That is insane. I have never heard of that. Well now you know you learn new things every day.

[Lindsay Chrisley]

Okay y', all, we have had some conversations about meal prepping and I have been doing that for the last couple of weeks weeks for my lunches, but for my dinners. It is so busy this time of year and I am trying to stay consistent with eating well. But between work and workouts and doing stuff for Jackson, cooking just is not happening through the week. Tempo gives me fresh balanced meals ready in two minutes so that I can eat the way I want without losing time. So during the week if your schedule is non stop, you're talking meetings, errands, late nights and healthy eating is usually the first thing to slip because I know that is so true in my house. Tempo will help keep you grounded with real meals that you can heat in two minutes so that you do not default to snacks or takeout. Tempo delivers fresh chef crafted dietitian approved meals right to your door and each meal is perfectly portioned for lunch or dinner and ready in just two minutes. That means real food real fast without the sad desk launch or drive through regret. With 20 new recipes every week made from nutrient rich ingredients, Tempo keeps things exciting and helps you stay consistent with healthy habits. One of my favorite things to do to prepare for my week is to go on and look at the recipes from Tempo to go on and look at the recipes for Tempo to see what I'm going to be eating the following week. And no matter what your goals are, there is a Tempo meal for you. So they have protein packed meals with up to 30 grams of protein. They have calorie conscious even GLP1 balance meals. It is convenient but also flexible enough to fit the way that you want to eat. And for a limited time, Tempo is offering my listeners 60% off your first your first box. Go to tempomeals.com Southerntea that's tempomeals.com SoutherNTea for 60% off your first box tempomeals.com SouthernTea rules and restrictions may apply at

[Becky]

VRBO we understand that even the best of plans sometimes need a little support. So we plan for the plot twists. Every booking is automatically backed by our

[Becky Hater]

VRBO care guarantee, giving you confidence from the very start. Whenever you need help, it's ready before

[Becky]

your stay, through the moments in between

[Becky Hater]

and after your trip. Because a great trip starts with peace of mind and maybe a good playlist.

[Progressive Insurance / Pluto TV / Other Advertisers]

But we've got the peace of mind part covered.

[Becky]

When I met David, we met on a boat and he wanted to take me on a date. And I'm like, no. Like, we're not going. Why would we go on a date? And then we got off the boat, and then he sent a calendar invite to go on said date. And I was like, okay. I mean, fine.

[Becky Hater]

So

[Becky]

we go on said date. And then I'm like, okay, I've got to wrap this up. Like, no kissing on the first date. No. Really, like touching. No, none of that.

[Becky Hater]

There's none of that in the lesbian world.

[Becky]

Really classy, you know, like, this is going to be. Class it up. Because if this ends up being my future husband, I don't want him to be able to tell his lifelong friends that he. On the first date. So we didn't. And then it was like, very casual for, like a period of time.

[Becky Hater]

Casual is not a word used in the lesbian world.

[Becky]

But you're doing whatever dynamic of girl, girl.

[Becky Hater]

Because girls are just like. Like, you know, they're emotionally. Like, they're already connected through conversation, right? Like, you already are infatuated with this person emotionally because of, like, the conversations that you're having. I don't know. I would.

[Becky]

I would love.

[Becky Hater]

I would. I would pay money to see you interact. Like, you interact with. With a lesbian in, like, a potential date way and, like, see what happens.

[Becky]

I mean, I think I would be

[Becky Hater]

like, you would get so annoyed. You'd be like, why are they. Like, what are they. Why are they text. Why did they send me flowers and

[Becky]

like, why did they text me so many times?

[Becky Hater]

Why did they say good night? What does that mean? Like, why trying.

[Becky]

Why are they trying to bring a U haul to the second date? Like, now there needs to be a tpo because you have freaked me out.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Becky]

Yeah, I can't. Oh, actually, before we do voicemails, I was talking to Hunter or on Sunday and we were, I mean, just chatting about all the things everywhere from, like, anal to dates and whatever. And I'm like, how do you people who are in the gay community, like, some people will have, like, had girlfriends, boyfriends, done everything sexually with like, that girl or guy, and then they just like, for a lifetime, switch the team somewhere else? Like, how does that happen.

[Becky Hater]

I think it's easy to get caught up in, like, what we think, like, society expects from us.

[Becky]

Yeah.

[Becky Hater]

Like, you still, as a human, are capable of loving another person. Like, like, in a non intimate way. Like, I still love, like, men in, like, friendships and in that way. So, like, I could have easily if I had never, like, I dated guys until I was 19. So, like, I still loved, like, men that I dated. It was just like, you know, like something. It's easy to get kind of in that. That trap of things, especially because, I don't know, I feel like there's a lot of lack of, like, emotional intelligence inside of, like, those kinds of relationships to begin with, like, from a man standpoint and not. Not at. Not in, like, a man shaming way. And, like, that's just how society has, like, groomed men, is to kind of be like that. So, like, you don't know what you're missing. I guess.

[Becky]

I mean, that makes sense. And I guess it would make sense to me that if you. You've never tried it before, you don't know until you have.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah. And, like, you could try it and, like, it's not the right person. Like, it's just, like, it's all about people.

[Becky]

I don't know.

[Becky Hater]

Like, it's not like, every girl I meet, I'm in love with or, like, have any sexual, like, attraction to them, too. Like, I meet, like, hot girls all the time that I have no interest in. It's just like, that human connection aspect that's just.

[Becky]

I don't know. It's. It's so interesting to me. Madison said that she wants to do this lesbian date thing. She says, can we do this, y'? All. Like, what would I provide to that situation?

[Becky Hater]

Girl, I. I'm, like, envisioning, like, a single me, like, con, like, convincing you to go out on a date with me, and just, like, the chaos that would

[Becky]

be, like, you're pissing me off.

[Becky Hater]

Take. We should go to a lesbian. I should take you and Kale both to a lesbian bar.

[AJ (Voicemail Caller)]

Bar.

[Becky]

Wait, I wonder if Kale's been to a lesbian bar before. Yeah, she has. With you now the rumors are gonna fly.

[Becky Hater]

We've been to Pride together. The first year I brought her to Pride, we went to a bunch of bars, and there's a bunch of lesbian bars. You should come to Pride with us this year.

[Becky]

So fun and also chaotic. But we're gonna get to the Southern Tea Hotline and listener advice. You guys, don't forget, if you want to submit a question Question, ask for advice or just spill some tea. You can call our Southern tea hotline at 929-333-6386. Leave us your message and we might play it on the show first. Voicemail.

[AJ (Voicemail Caller)]

Hey, my name is AJ and I have been listening to you for several years and even watch Chrisley Knows Best. Back in the day I was actually at your Dallas show and didn't get a chance to share my story. So I wanted to keep things light and thought I'd share a funny story that happened to me while I was in college. Me and this guy met in college and we went to a very strict private Christian university where we had curfews every night. I lived in an all girls dorm and we couldn't have guys in our rooms like ever. So of course I had to get my rocks off somehow. So every other night we would sneak to a park behind the school where we'd get it on in the back of this 2006 Volvo. One night we had just wrapped up our session and we were hanging out in the backseat. Butt ass naked, no clothes, just five. All of a sudden we see bright light. So bright we were blinded and literally could not see. A loud voice yelled, put on your clothing and step out of the vehicle. I immediately knew it was a cop and I began flipping. He turned down his bright so we could see and we quickly put our clothes back on. When we got out, he asked for our IDs, but at the time I only had my school ID with me. He realized we were students at the Christian university across the street and began to lecture us about finding better places to get it on. To say I was relieved was an understatement. I would say the school we attended, but now I actually work for the same university. Not only are me and hot hookup guy married now, but we also have a 10 month old baby girl. Thanks for listening. I love you and keep your head up. You're such an inspiration to young moms.

[Becky]

Not the 2006 Volvo.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, I miss those days of hooking up in a car.

[Becky]

Hooking up in a car is crazy.

[Becky Hater]

That's so fun though.

[Becky]

Like, like, okay, number one in a car just seems like so inconvenient. It's not even.

[Becky Hater]

It's just like getting heated, windows fogged, you know.

[Becky]

Damn, why are the windows fogging?

[Becky Hater]

You wish you knew, Lindsay. You wish you knew.

[Becky]

I'm just like, can't we just do it in a surface at the house? Like kitchen counter?

[Becky Hater]

No, the fun of it is like, oh, there's so like tension you can't wait to get anywhere. You've been living life wrong. You know how many times I've hooked up with a girl on a first date in a car? Talk about first dates with girls. They last long because you end up hooking up in a car.

[Becky]

Okay, I have to move on. Next voicemail.

[Progressive Insurance / Pluto TV / Other Advertisers]

I watch listen to you on all your platforms. I just think that you're an amazing mother, an amazing person, and the growth is amazing and I just love you guys. I have absolutely admired your single parenting co parenting relationship with Will. I have never had to be a single parent until 2023. Me and my husband have been together for 18 years and married for about 10 years. And in 2023 he turned himself in for a felony crime and I had to take on the role of being a single parent. I have three children, 16, 10, and 5. My 10 year old has some special needs, but he's okay. And I just want to say I never knew how fucking hard it was to be a single parent. And my hat just. I took my hat off to you guys and I feel like I am now in that category. He was sentenced to five years. He is set to get out in 2027. What that looks like for me and him, I have no idea. Because to be honest with you, who would have thought that I would have been in this situation? But absence makes the heart grow fonder. And he has also allowed me to see that I can do this. So I just wanted to say, you know, it's all kinds of ways of being a single parent and ways of getting here, and it's. It just makes you realize that you're not alone. And so I thank you so much. I have been wanting to do this for the longest. I'm from South Carolina, I'm a nurse, and I'm listening to your shit every week, girl. Love you. Bye, man.

[Becky Hater]

What beautiful insight, right? Like, I love humans, I love people, and like a seriously unfortunate circumstance. But like, like, it's such a lesson to learn for.

[Becky]

I really loved how she said that, like single parenthood, like there's multiple ways to get there. There.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, right?

[Becky]

Like, yeah, it is so very true. But then also when I was listening to that, I'm like, oh my God, she's got like real life problems going on and I'm just bitching about my ex husband going to Myrtle beach and pissing me off.

[Becky Hater]

We're allowed to complain about our, our lives and still while people are experiencing things tougher, I don't think it's tit for tat there.

[Becky]

But, man, I just couldn't imagine, like, being with somebody for night for 18 years, married 10. They're out committing a felony for sure.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Becky]

And your whole world implodes. Right.

[Becky Hater]

But, like, what's. It's beautiful. Like, in her words of, like, it shows. It has shown her how strong, like, she is and, like, how capable she is. Is. Which could unlock, like, a million things for yourselves. Yourself as well. Man, these are fun. The voicemails are fun.

[Becky]

If you look at a situation like that, it really is like an opportunity for personal growth, like, through sadness, right?

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, yeah.

[Becky]

No, the voicemails, they're so fun. The one that we played last week, I was like, jaw on the floor.

[Becky Hater]

Oh, man.

[Becky]

Like. Like talking about. I think it was like a strap on or something. I'm like, yeah, I'm not prepared, you know?

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, I know. Well, it's been lovely talking to you and having this conversation. I'm going. My friend just opened a med spa. And so if. If anyone listening is in the East Stroudsburg Poconos area, Thrive Aesthetics just opened today. Beautiful. Like, her husband is a general contractor, and, like, they bought an old. Built, like a older building and redid the whole thing. It is immaculate. She's the I. That's where I get my Botox from. But they have all the services, so if you're in the area, make sure to go check out Thrive esthetics because it is, like, top of the line.

[Becky]

What are you getting done?

[Becky Hater]

I get a little bit of Botox here. I have to get my crow's feet done. I didn't get them last time. The reason I started was because of my 11. So, like, my 11 used to be so bad that like, like, they would be like this and I would get, like, tan lines and it would make me feel so self conscious.

[Becky]

And it's so weird how different people age because some people get the 11s and then some people get it, like, a lot right here.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah.

[Becky]

And I haven't ever had the. Well, I don't even move, so. But you know what I mean? Like, I never had those. But it's just so weird how different people age and how you can do one service and it can, like, fix all the things.

[Becky Hater]

Yeah, but you were talking about micro needling Christina there. I. I've done that with her and not micro needing the shaving the face.

[Becky]

Oh, dermaplaning.

[Becky Hater]

Dermaplaning. Yeah, but they have, like, all those, like, services and facials and stuff too. I'm going to go have myself a

[Becky]

day if I told people one service to go and get and if like we're talking budget, I feel like the dermaplaning is the best like like exfoliator and makes your skin look so good because all of your products and stuff like penetrate so much better. So it's also probably saving you money also on your products because you're using less. So yeah, that would be my advice. But thank you so much for joining me. Love you so much.

[Becky Hater]

Love you.

[Becky]

I'll be kiki and around with you on text before I talk to you on here again. If you guys have not subscribed to the show, you can do that from any, any podcast app wherever you get your pods. Always first at podcast one. We hope you guys have a great week and we'll talk to you soon.

[Becky Hater]

Love you. Bye.

[Becky]

Pluto TV has thousands of free movies and TV shows. You swear?

[Becky Hater]

If I'm lying, I'm dying. This is the mindset.

[Becky]

Free. This is the mantra.

[AJ (Voicemail Caller)]

Free.

[Becky]

This is the

[Progressive Insurance / Pluto TV / Other Advertisers]

with movies like Titanic,

[Becky]

Dream Girls and Gladiation, why are you not entertained?

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And TV shows like Survivor, SpongeBob SquarePants, the fairly odd Parents and Ghosts, Pluto

[Becky]

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[Becky Hater]

the Haters presents Wallet Therapy. I'm Becky the Spender. And I'm Alex the coach. We give money advice for the everyday person.

[Becky]

So join us with your budget and your baggage because money doesn't have to be messy forever.

[Becky Hater]

Search for the haters and subscribe today.