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Good morning, girlies. It's the Toast. It's Jackson Claude, and we're your host.
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It's your favorite show.
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The best five things you need to know.
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We'll start your day off Swirly. It's the Toast.
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They sound amazing.
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Welcome back to the Toast and Happy Friday. Yeah, that's right, it's Friday and it's Jackson Turd. Two most like the most amazing things I could have said. It's Jackson Turd and it's Friday.
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I have my own dance now. I don't know if you've seen it.
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Oh, did it go viral on TikTok?
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It's kind of like a take on the apple.
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Oh, you're putting the apple back together.
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Yeah, but when she does the apple. Is it meant to be apple?
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It's like, heartbreaking. Yeah, I think the apple's not.
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So I'm just doing the apple.
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Yes, but no, she's breaking. You're putting it together.
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Yeah, but I just find myself now when I'm talking, like, how people used to wave me, like. Like I just go like this.
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Like, that's so Gen Z of you. Say last best day.
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So Gen Z of me. And like, it's meant that the person that I'm engaging with would do the other hand and then we would be whole. Like, I'm just always like, I love you so funny.
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Like, I've never seen you do that to me. Like, that's interesting. You know, you don't see me, I don't see you. You don't see me, but you don't see me. You don't see me. I see you all the fucking time.
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Okay, well, right before we started recording, you sort of dropped a bombshell that you have to drop a bombshell episode.
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I was saying that today's episode, sometimes Fridays, we just sort of like, you
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said you wanted to pitch this episode to Major News Network.
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Yeah. Well, we have a lot to cover
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today because you have a bombshell.
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Secret Lies of Mormon Wives came out. Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. There's actually just, like, a lot of news. We have Queenie and we need. So it's going to be a nice, meaty episode. And I also shared, like, yes, I am dropping a bomb. Like, something crazy happened to me. But you're going to have to wait till Queenie and Meanie of the week because it's unfortunately in. I can't, like, I can't say it right now.
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Okay. I. I'm fine to wait.
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And I think that'll really entice people to Listen to the whole episode.
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1,000%. I'm fine to wait. I just want to say it better be good.
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It is good. And I just want to say this is the punishment for those who don't follow me on Tik Tok. Because if you were on TikTok, you would have saw the video I already posted.
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For those of us who are maintaining our privacy, for those of you who
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refuse to give your data to the China Communist Party.
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It's true.
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For my fellow commies. We're in the now. They're in and out. Yeah.
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Okay.
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Yeah. So you have to wait.
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Pros and cons of the commie Party. Pros and cons of being on TikTok.
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Yeah, you're in the know, but so you just have to wait. But we also do have, like a bombshell episode outside of the big Bomb.
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Yeah.
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That I'm dropping.
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Yeah.
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Bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb. What's it from? You can't say bomb on a plane. Bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb.
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Meet the fuckers. Meet the parents. Yes. The OG The Meet the parents.
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Yeah. But he was so crazy. Ben Stiller in that movie, like, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb.
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Yeah.
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And then he gets, like, detained.
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Of course. Of course.
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That's so funny.
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Speaking of, the terrorists were wild in yesterday.
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Oh, my God. I was like, where is she going with speaking up?
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I think that was a good segue.
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Yes. Like, as good of a segue as you can. About, like a shooting at a synagogue.
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Yeah. A car ramming. Ram the truck through the synagogue preschool, drove down the hallway only to be shot in the head by security.
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I can't wait till the literal slay. Yeah.
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I'm really looking forward to all the
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details, like, coming out about who this person is.
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This here.
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Because I'm ready. Like, where's the gofundme? Sign me up. Like, I'm ready. So scary.
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Like, if not for that security guard, like, this would be. Yesterday would have been, like, seriously such a tragic day.
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Yep. For American people.
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Jewish people.
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Yeah.
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Thank God.
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Thank. Like, literally thank God.
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But. And then someone did lose their life yesterday in another terrorist attack at a university.
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Yeah.
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What was the name of the school?
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Old Dominion.
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Old Dominion.
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I only know that because, of course, the band.
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I didn't know it was a school too.
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Me neither.
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Such a sad story.
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Terrible.
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It's crazy. It's really crazy.
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So I guess, yeah, the segue was appropriate.
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I thought I did a nice job.
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Listen, you guys were just doing our best. Like, please.
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No, but, like, I just.
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I know Such a pit. Such a pit about the. Like, about all of it, but especially about, like, what could have been.
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It was a preschool.
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Just. I have, like, it was like all. It's a very big. I actually know a lot of people who send their kids there. Like, it's a big compound. It's a temple. It's a preschool. There was. Preschool was actively in session.
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Yeah.
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Just terrible.
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Yeah.
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Really, like, seriously, thank the Lord and the security guard.
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Yeah. What else happened yesterday?
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I watched the Secret Lives of Mormon Wives only the first episode. I have a lot of strong feelings. Like, extremely strong.
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I think I watched like 15 minutes enough to, like, see what's going on in the world of slammu.
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And it's just sometimes when you haven't watched a show in a while, it takes like a second to get back in. These girls are consummate professionals. The way I'm sat. Look, I forgot there's so much to catch up. And I forgot all about the Jordan and Jesse drama. Like, I forgot really about a lot of it. So we're going to talk about it because we need to talk about Michaela and Jace. Like, drama.
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Drama that will be in the story. So I think, like fifth and final story, maybe fourth story will be like the news from Swamu and recap.
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I don't have a lot to spoil. I only watch the first episode.
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Fifth, right? No, same. But, like, there's a lot to say. And then fifth, we'll do Beverly Hills because we have Beverly Hills stories and we just have, like, a lot of stories to sum up the week. I would say I like when a
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Friday ends in very full circle.
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I would call this episode in summation if I wanted to be.
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If you want to come up with a title already. No, mine would have to be about the Bombshell. Well, what's that movie about? Megyn Kelly is called Bombshell? Yeah, Just Bombshell? I think so a bad name for the movie.
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Well, I think it was like, I never saw the movie.
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So you didn't know it was very good?
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Yeah, no, I heard great things. And based on what? I think I know. Let me tell you why I think it was called Bombshell. One maybe it was based on a book called Bombshell, but one like. I think the women were bombshells. Right.
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Oh, double entendre. Yeah.
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To the story was a bombshell. Yeah.
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No, you're right. It was like a couple of Bombshell women.
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So I think it was a double entendre.
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Okay, you're. You're right.
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For that movie. I didn't See, Yeah, maybe I'll watch.
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Was like, it was a movie that felt like a real movie.
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Yeah.
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And the more I live, like, I'm
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always looking for movies that are like, you know, we're the glory movies of their day. But I didn't get around to watching them and, like, it never come. That's right.
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It was a very buzzy Oscar movie, like, of the year.
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I was like, Interstellar, you know, Interstellar, my new favorite movie that I don't understand. And I just want someone to talk to me about it.
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All right, I'll work on it.
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I just want to know the end. It's not like, you know. No, actually, people have different interpretations of the end. It's. It's like it. The. It ends, and I'm just like, can I just get clarification on what.
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Google it.
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I could, but I'd rather talk to people. I'm a people person.
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The communicator.
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I don't want to lose that human connection.
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I do. Desperately.
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I don't want to lose that human connection.
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That human what? I say that human what?
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Q nex.
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Yeah.
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I say please and thank you to chat gbt. Like, that's just something.
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Okay, well, you're wasting batteries.
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No, I actually saw a tweet that was such a slay about why it's totally fine. And you should say please and thank you to your chatgpt because it does inform how you move in this world and you start barking orders.
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Right.
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And how some people, like, when they have their kids talk to Alexa, they have them say please to Alexa. And even though Alexa doesn't need a please or thank you, it's like, that's how you speak to people when you're asking for something.
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I agree with what you're saying as it regards to children, but, like, I know when I'm talking to a robot versus a human being, I'm not going to start yelling at a waiter versus how I did it chatgpt last night when they were helping me make salmon burgers.
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No, but, like, even I. I'm on this, like, text thread. You're on it too, where, like, you can text for things, you know, like, where you have questions.
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Yeah.
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Yeah. You know what I mean?
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Yeah. It's like a customer service text.
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Customer service text thread.
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Yeah.
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And it's a person on the other end. However, like, the way that I write yes is the same way I'd write to chat. Like, hi, is this and this open? You know what I mean?
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And they always sign it like, hey, you're all set. X Taylor from Relations.
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You know and like the. If I start like talking nasty to chat then that's how I would talk in other customer service. Like I think it's a full 360 picture of manners.
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I forget who said it but honestly I think about this person. Somebody made a joke once. I really would love to know who it is to properly credit it. But like how they can never run for president because of that one customer service call and you know they like record for quality service.
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Funny.
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It's. I forget I don't know if it was like a stand up special or somebody said it to me like I never heard it. It was so funny. Funny. I would love to properly credit.
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I'm sorry, that's really funny. I've never heard that.
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But yeah, like now our chat GPT history is going to start coming up in presidential elections.
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But also regarding being polite to chat it in it changes how chat responds to you. I saw that. If you like our ass chat like reasonably and sensibly and politely like they'll get you answers from Google or whatever. If you like bark orders at them, they get you answers from Reddit.
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Yikes. Yeah, yeah.
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Interesting. It was a very interesting.
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But you are wasting a battery. You know, every time chat has to like no, but answer it burns the energy of a lithium battery.
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Right. But compared to how much they burn in total, how much money is spent on chat like you are please. And your thank you is nothing. Don't worry about it.
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Don't you feel like there was a big period of your life where like you didn't use batteries? Like I feel like batteries sort of like came back. Well no, no, I feel like they were sort of going extinct until I had a baby. Now oh my God, I'm always changing batteries and stuff. But like before that the remotes don't have batteries anymore. Like besides kids toys, what uses batteries?
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So my frother, I use a battery operated milk. Frother milk, what's it called? Yeah, like whisker. Yeah, because it's way more powerful. I tried the ones that charge. They stink. Yeah, they don't hold a charge and then they stop working and they use like the cheap USB C. So Lauren Elizabeth was like you have to get a battery operated one. And I did. And since Laure Elizabeth was on the toast in June, I have not had to change the battery. Just saying we kind of gotta go
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back to the OG batteries. Yeah, like I feel that way about my stroller fan. One of my like full time jobs is Making sure the stroller fan is always charged. Especially while we're in Florida. In the Hamptons, too. It was, like, over the summer. Such a big deal.
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And I just had extra batteries.
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I couldn't help but thinking, like, these should be battery operated. Yeah, yeah.
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Keep extra batteries in the stroller.
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Yeah.
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And now people use, like, the cell batteries. What are those called?
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They look like quarters.
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Yeah. And they're very dangerous. Are they kids? If they swallow them, oh, it's like a problem. But a lot of them have this cell. What's it called?
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Button battery.
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It doesn't feel right either. It's like.
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So, okay, it's a button battery or it's a button battery. I mean, I guess it looks like a button, so that feels right. So what is sell.
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What's it? A coin? Cell bag. Oh, a coin.
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Yeah, A quarter.
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Okay, so we're saying the same thing.
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Quarter.
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I'm happy. Maybe it's just, like, different brands, you know, it's like the Duracell versus the
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Energizer Bunny or the Buricell. You know, Energizer.
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That's all Duracell. Are there other batteries?
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Energizer.
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Oh, right.
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Am I speaking fucking English?
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You said Energizer Bunny.
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Yeah. Because I was like, what's the company? Energizer.
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Interesting. I think they sort of gave up.
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Don't you find connection?
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They've not made that connection strong enough inside, guys.
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Don't you feel like they've sort of given up? There was, like, during my childhood, Duracel is the Coca Cola. Right. And they were really doing the most with their commercials just to sort of be like, there are other options for batteries. And I feel like they kind of give up.
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Yeah. I think they're just like, we're here. Take it or leave it. If you need a battery, you can call.
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If we're sold out of Duracell, but
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we're not going to, like, try and convince you that you need batteries, because, like, you'll know when you need one.
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And I'm. I wouldn't say, like, I think consciously about what types of batteries, but I've never bought anything other than Duracell.
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But, you know, like, Amazon needs batteries. Like, if you go to Amazon.
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I'm sorry.
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Batteries.
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I do have a big box of Amazon Basics in my home in New York.
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So, like, that's the new battery.
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Yeah. Because, like, whatever comes up first. Yeah, that's the new battery.
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Whatever comes up first. Bestie.
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Okay. Okay.
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Crazy.
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Like, like I said, it's a bombshell episode. Did I lie?
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It's a bombshell episode, bestie.
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It's a bombshell episode, Pesty. Everyone loves us. Oh my God.
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Shall we get into this bombshell episode of an episode? Okay, you guys.
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Okay bestie.
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Okay, bestie.
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See?
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Say less. Without further ado. To do. To do. It is time for the Fast 5 stories that you to do need to
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They're elevated. When we went to the store in the Hamptons, like we just felt like we really felt something while we were there. This weekend I used my Roller Rabbit tote which is the most amazing tote we're always looking for. Biggest bag ever that can fit everything. Like the perfect beach bag. I love it. Also matched Harry's swimsuit. They sent like matching stuff for the family and had the best day ever. And it's not not because of Roller Rabbit.
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Yeah, and you probably recognize a lot of their prints cuz it's like very vibrant, very colorful, very like whimsical. That's the word I was looking for. Pattern, print and color are at the core of what they do. They design thoughtfully crafted essentials using premium materials like 100% Pima cotton. Their ultra plush Pima soft fabric, natural linens and washable silks. So visit roller rabbit.com and take 20% off your purchase of $150 or more with code Swirly20 at checkout. Again, that's R O L L E R R A-B B I T.com code I R L Y 20 Swirly 20 for 20% off your order of 150 or more. Terms and exclusions apply. Today's episode is also brought to you by Home Chef. You know, this time of year, something that I think we all agree on is like good meals are timeless no matter what time of year it is. Home Chef has been our go to for cozy home cooked meals without the hassle from easy Oven ready meals to hearty satisfaction. Recipes that make dinners feel effortless. So Home Chefs cooking makes cooking simple. It's fresh food delivered, it's easy recipes to follow and meals that actually taste great. I think a lot of people go to Home Chef for different reasons. For me, whenever I do Home Chef, it's because I quite literally cannot cook. Some people want to learn to cook. They use Home Chef. Some people just want to stop ordering in so much. Some people want to eat healthier, some people want to save money. There's a million good reasons to do Home Chen. If you are looking for like one of these services, Home Chef is really loved. It's the number. It's rated number one by users of other meal kits for quality, convenience, value, taste and recipe ease. I also think a really good reason to do it is if you're looking to expand your pallet. I sometimes order things on Home Chef that I would like never order in a restaurant. It does make you, like feel open to adventure. If you're a picky eater or a sufferer of arfid, they worked with chefs like Gordon Ramsay. Now they're partnering with Giada de la Rentis. Ever heard of her? To bring restaurant quality recipes straight to your kitchen. It's not one size fits all. They have over 30 meal options every week to choose for different diets and different tastes. So for a limited time, Home Chef is offering our listeners 50 off and free shipping for your first box. Plus free dessert for life when you go to home chef.com toast. It's a really good offer. It's home chef.com t o a s t for 50 off your first box and free dessert for life home chef.com toast. You must be an active subscriber to receive the free dessert. Today's episode is also brought to you by first day. So most parents aren't aware that 50% of kids suffer from something called hidden hunger. And that can come from picky eaters. From eating a lot of processed snacks or even a lack of nutrient rich soil in the fruits and veggies that they do eat. 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They're back with another Robeck release and they really just do keep getting better. The past couple of weeks everyone was smiling over they dropped biker short sets and by the way, did you see them? I saw everyone wearing like that blue biker short set and then they came back with the mock neck which I told you about a few weeks ago. And I'm sorry if you did not get it. It did sell out in 48 hours and we did a couple of ads for them. So like you, the only person you really have to blame is yourself. And now they're back with a full spring launch, new dresses and skorts. So they launched two new active dresses and two new skorts. They're live on the website right now. They're really cute. Part of the Vista collection, which we've told you guys about. You know, from the biker shorts and bras. The fabric is very soft. It's very smoothing and supportive without feeling tight. So it's one of those fabrics that once you Feel it. You're going to want to get a bunch of different items in that fabric because I find a lot of the times when I'm wearing, like, athleisure that's just not well made. Like, my cellulite will show through my leggings. I'm sorry, that's just not an option for me. Well, Robex took care of that. Also, the Melbourne dress, that's, like, one of their best selling active dresses. It's brand new, it's elevated. If you're into, like, golf, tennis, pickleball, whether you play those or you just, like, hang around the court and you want to look like you do, it's very flattering, very polished, athletic energy. You could wear it to a tennis match, but then also, like, out to brunch. It's very cute. Still. And our code toast on Roback is still active. T O A S T. That'll get you 20% off your first order through the end of this week. That's Roback. R H O b a c k.roback.com Code Toast.
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Thank you. Code Turt.
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You're welcome.
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Our first story. Claudia dropped her iPad in a bombshell move.
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What did I say? Did I lie at the beginning of this episode?
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Our first story. Doja Cat is taking back Timothy Chalamet criticism and says, I've never been to a ballet or opera. My outrage was virtue signaling, a way to garner clicks, likes, and approval.
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Slay the house down boots. I think it's actually amazing when someone's able to acknowledge this. However, I do like anyone who was susceptible enough to, like, hop on the Timothy Chalamet bandwagon of hate, like, is a loser. So while I really respect this, anybody who's, like, making videos, like, here's what I think about Timothy Chalamet. We don't give a. Like, nobody asked.
A
I saw a video yesterday that, like, really radicalized me. Oh, to be pro Timothy.
B
Okay.
A
The one.
B
Yeah, I do.
A
And like I said yesterday when we closed out the segment, like, I don't really care, like, about what Timothy said. Didn't say. I'm not mad. I'm not supporting it. Like, I just don't care. After seeing some of these dumb bitches try and, like, make themselves seem important by discussing the matter, I feel the need to defend Timothy because I just can't be on the other side now.
B
Yeah, it's actually crazy how everybody's being like, here are my thoughts on the Timothy. Here are my thoughts. Who are you?
A
No, seriously. And it's not anyone that, like, Would have any.
B
The only person allowed to speak is Missy Copeland.
A
And she did. And maybe you know what?
B
She's allowed to be mad.
A
Maria Callis.
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Is she alive posthumously? Yes. Maria Callis. Like, again, in order.
A
Maybe also Jenny Lind could have an opinion.
B
The real life. Here are the people who are eligible to be mad or even just like, make a statement on Mikhail Gorbachev. Okay, Mr. Gorbachev, tear down that wall.
A
Alexander Petrovsky.
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Yeah, the actor who plays it because he was in the ballet. Petrovsky, he's like a famous ballerina. Misty Copeland. And anybody who can seriously name three operas or three ballets and I.
A
Not including the Nutcracker, unfortunately.
B
Fine. No, Jackie.
A
And I just want to say, including
B
the Nutcracker, you can use that as your first one.
A
And I want to say, like, I went to the ballet this year. Last year.
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She supports. She's what they call a patron.
A
I went to actually two ballets last year. So you actually can't tell me nothing.
B
Okay, so you went to the Nutcracker and then.
A
And then the Nutcracker twice. Okay, yeah, so I've seen the Nutcracker twice.
B
Oh, sorry. I went also. We're there in Palm Beach.
A
Oh, yeah. Last year.
B
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And we're not mad. So. Yeah.
A
Anyways, Doja cat. I actually think, like, Doja Cat. I don't know if she's saying all of this in earnest. I feel like she was sort of conducting a social experiment on herself.
B
Yes. It feels like the Stanford prison experiment, like.
A
So she's walking back her criticism of Timothy amid the continued outrage over him dissing opera and ballet, if that's what you want to call it. She said in originally, she chided him in a sincerely a tick tock post, telling him that people give a about opera and ballet. She explained, hey, by the way, opera's 400 years old, ballet is 500 years old. Somebody named Timothy Chalame had the nerve. Big guy, by the way, had the nerve to say on camera that nobody cares about it. You show up in a nice outfit, you sit the fuck down and shut the fuck up. That's the usual etiquette around those things. Maybe learn something from that. Okay, now, she said that she knows nothing about opera or ballet. She's never even been to see the theater in either art form live in person. She admitted that she merely jumped on the outrage bandwagon. In her original video. She said, quote, I've never been to a ballet, I've never seen an opera. And I took it upon myself yesterday to kind of give it to the man. Because there is a culture based around outrage and things like that, and people want to feel like they're part of something. It's a need to connect, whether good or bad. What I was doing yesterday was virtue signaling because I wanted to connect. And I knew that Timothy's goof up was something that I could leverage in order for people to connect with me and fuck with me. And it's easy. It's a modern way to garner clicks, likes, and all kinds of things like that from people. And so I did that yesterday and I didn't really think about why I was doing it. I don't know anything about opera. I don't know anything about ballet, and I've never been to either shows. And I think I just wanted a hug. I. I think that's all that I wanted.
B
This is kind of manic, but also a hug.
A
I wanted to feel like I was a part of something bigger than myself. I wanted to be pat on the back the way everyone, everybody else is patting each other on the back in the comment sections. And I wanted to look like a hero. And that's what happened. And when I got it, I didn't like it so much. It just kind of furthers the fact that sometimes I think. And then I'm like, never mind. So never mind.
B
I mean, this is really bordering between, like, prolific and manic.
A
This is. No, I'm sorry, this is kind of prolific. It encapsulates, so it does different things that happen every day on the Internet of people just like hopping on bag wagon, feeling rage for things that have nothing to do with them, that they don't even care about, that this isn't even know about. So manufactured and just really needing a hug.
B
Yeah.
A
Needing to feel like a part of
B
something, you know, and it's not even that. Needing a hug. The part that I found to be so brilliant was like, like using the outreach. Like you actually don't even really feel strongly about in order to, like, garner likeness for yourself. Like, there's community in being a hater.
A
Yeah.
B
And like, you benefit from being an out. Like, I'm sorry, this whole Timothy Chalamet thing is the biggest L for Jamie Lee Curtis. She's like one of the most famous people talking out, speaking out. And it's like, shut up.
A
Well, she, like, loves speaking out.
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She does. She's a speaker outer.
A
She's like getting in the ring on things that don't have to do with her. And that's like. And now it has to do with her, because now anytime something happens, it's like, well, what does Jamie Lee Curtis think? Like, because she sort of put that self in her. That position as, like, a cultural commentator. Okay.
B
I.
A
It's not for me, but okay.
B
Yeah.
A
And so I. I honestly, I love this from Doja Cat. Like, I really love it.
B
A rare sleigh for one Mrs. Cat. I don't know.
A
I feel like she slays here and there.
B
She's confusing. Like.
A
Yeah, but it's very. Yeah, there's no, Like, a lot of
B
her Internet behavior and just, like, career is, like, trolley, so I never know when she's being serious.
A
Yeah. And I wonder if she said something about Timothy just so that she could then say. I wouldn't be surprised if it's not like, she actually went on this journey. She was just trying to show you guys, like, this is what we're all doing. Not me. Sorry. I don't do it. I actually feel like whatever this is, I do the opposite of, like, I.
B
You say the opposite. Just so somebody says, that's how I feel. Something. Yeah.
A
Yeah. No, Like, I want to be a part of.
B
No, I actually do. I actually do feel like we're so against this type of Internet behavior that it does cloud our takes on stuff because we, more often than not, don't like to go with the herd. And I actually feel like, in time, like, in the moment, people always, like, you have the worst takes, whatever. But, like, years later, I actually always feel good about that. You know how I kind of feel like that now? I feel like people are really changing their tune on Sophia Franklin. And, like, at the time, I remember when we were discussing it, we were like, well, Sophia's not greedy for wanting more money. And, like, you know, she does know the value of the podcast. And really, everybody was like, sophia's greedy. She's a sloot. Or whatever. Like, and now everyone's like, we did wrong for Sophia. We. Not me. Like, I feel like we reported on that really fairly and didn't jump on the bandwagon. Only because, honestly, like, she was getting it so bad. Like, I wasn't gonna give it. No.
A
I think our bias came from not wanting, like, a podcast duo to break up. Like, because I think we always were like, can they figure it out? I feel like we saw ourselves in them, and that just, like, hurts, you know?
B
Yeah.
A
Same with Grace and Brianna.
B
And nobody wants to hear it, but same with Blake Lively.
A
I think time will be on your side.
B
Yeah. Like, when the documentary comes out, it's like, you know, when the Britney one likes, like, the media was so bad. It's like, we're the media now. Everyone on the Internet, like, creates public opinion. And so when the documentaries came up, like, the world was so bad to her. The world, it was you, not me.
A
And like, back in the day, it was. It was, you know, talking head.
B
Yeah.
A
People on shows and stuff. Now it's. And it's also the people with the green screen videos and drama channels. Yeah. And maybe, like, eventually I'll be. Have the wrong take because I just don't want to be on the side of the outrage. But, yeah, that's my gut feeling is I don't want to be on the side of the outreach, especially when I'm personally, like, not outreach. It does not have balance. Opera. I don't have to do it when,
B
like, a former pop star, like, like the Britney Christina, when all those, like, documentaries or books come out. Like, the. The takeaway for a lot of people is like, oh, the world was so cruel. Cruel. And the media. And we have, like, people to blame. Right. People are like, people love to blame Diane Sawyer, you know, like, for her crazy questions. But now, like, the Barbara Walters. The media has. Thank you. Not Diane Sawyer, Barbara Walters. The media has sort of been democratized where, like, every, like, the opinions of people come from just, like, voices of randos, comment sections, random tweets that go viral. So I think what Doja Cat has very poignantly pointed out is that, like, those, like, outrage just. Ben. Like, it just furthers that system.
A
It's just a new system.
B
Yeah.
A
And so, yeah, it didn't go away. It just changed.
B
Exactly. So, like, in years, we're gonna be like, I can't. I really feel like people are gonna be like that with, like, lively being, like, the world was so evil. And it's like. Well, I tried to tell you guys.
A
I don't know. I'm. I'm too confused on that one. Yeah, I'm not gonna call it.
B
Okay.
A
Either way, I'm just throwing my hands
B
up, not my plate.
A
Yeah. Are you ready for our next story? Some major news. In the entertainment space, Travis Kelsey is officially the new brand ambassador for Six Flags.
B
Oh, did we report this?
A
Well, he was, like, doing something with Six Flags, and now it's that he will serve as Six Flags, his brand ambassador and marketing partner.
B
They also went out of business. Bankrupt. We reported that. Yeah, we did.
A
Well, now they obviously have a big plan to come back, and it's Travis Kelsey.
B
Well, that's good. What about that.
A
That old guy that dances in the commercials.
B
I mean, that was, like, literally when we were kids. He has since passed.
A
He has. Yeah.
B
I remember when he did.
A
Travis will be doing that or his dad or he'll be dancing in commercials, you know?
B
Yeah. No, Travis is, like, very family friendly. Like, and it's funny because I think, like, as a person, he's not. But his brand, for some reason, like, sports is. Because sports is very, like, you know, kids. And, you know, he's gen. He's like one of the General Mill cereal guys. Like, it's. He does, like, a lot of kids stuff, so it's kind of perfect. Even though I think as a person, he's probably, like, quite vulgar, you know?
A
Yeah.
B
But I love slay. Yeah.
A
Cute.
B
Very cute.
A
When's the last time you've been to Six Flags?
B
Fun fact about me, I've never been to a Six Flags. I don't like roller coasters.
A
They're somewhere in the northeast of 10, similar to 6 Flags, but it's not called Six Flags.
B
I've been to, like, plenty of amusement parks, water parks, like, Splish, Flash, you
A
know, like, amusement park.
B
Yeah. Where do we used to go at Camp Fun?
A
Camelback.
B
No, no. No fun. I've been to Splash Town. So much fun. But no, in Maine. What was Camel. No, in Maine.
A
Splash Town.
B
No fun. Fun. Yeah. Yeah. Those were some of the best memories of my life.
A
Oh, my God. I dreaded those days.
B
Classic you. I dreaded when I die and, like, what I envision. Heaven. It was literally Funtown. Splash Town. Oh, my God. I wonder if it's as, like, beautiful as I remember or if it's, like,
A
being, like, the mo. Like, I know amusement parks can be gross, but, like, Funtown was, like, the premium.
B
Yeah.
A
It was, like, fancy.
B
Was it?
A
Definitely. No.
B
Okay. It was, like, probably the most fun I've ever had. Like, the happiest I've ever been in my whole life.
A
I always wound up having fun on those days, but I just tried. I hate the fun field trip. I remember when I was a freshman in high school at my first high school that I went to because I. I transferred high schools in the middle of high school, which, yeah, is as hard as it sounds. We won our school color war, like, every grade, like, and it's kind of amazing. The freshmen beat the seniors huge. So we got a trip to Six Flags, and I remember my allergies were so bad that day.
B
You're such a diva.
A
Because it was, like, at the beginning of spring.
B
Seriously hauling in the air.
A
And I'd never been on upside down roller coaster.
B
Yeah, me neither.
A
And, like, my friends convinced me to go on so I could wait it on the line. And by the time we got to the end of the line, I was like, I really don't want to go. But, like, I just waited on this line. Like, I have to go. I can't have just wasted my time. So I did it. I went on an upside down roller coaster, and it was such a thrill. Really? Yeah. I then I read, rode, like, a couple more. You throw up? No, I had a great day. And then by the end, I was like, I've had my fill. I need to do this again.
B
Yeah. I have been on, like, a couple of roller coasters.
A
Upside down. No, that's like, that's when you leveled up.
B
I'm sorry. I think that's so unnecessary, like, in this life. What are we doing? And anytime I've gone on a roller coaster, like, right when I'm, like, at the apex, I'm like, why the did I do this? And, like, I don't even like it afterwards. Like, I'm sorry.
A
No, it's called Spider Man. That was the one I went on. Anyone been there? And Six Flags.
B
What's the fun town? Splash Town like? The big one. It started.
A
Yeah.
B
It was made of wood. And I do feel like it's probably, like, condemned now. I need to look up pictures of Funtown Splashdown just to, like, remember.
A
And it had, like, a little town. Right. It felt like you were in the Beauty and the Beast.
B
Kind of like how Disney has, like, Main Street.
A
Yeah.
B
Fun town, Splashtown. So it is still open for business.
A
I wasn't big on the splash town.
B
Oh, no. Temporarily closed. That's really upsetting.
A
Yeah.
B
Creates memories that will last a lifetime. Apparently not since.
A
Well, you could go to Six Flags now.
B
No. Funtown Splash Town, like, is.
A
Well, I guess now the adult version of going to the parent version of going to Six Flags is like going to Disney with your kids at this age.
B
Excalibur, not Excelsior.
A
I'm sorry.
B
And, yeah, it was literally made of wood. That does not look safe.
A
Like, piece of wood.
B
You look like piece of wood.
A
But it was, like, the biggest wooden roller coaster in the country.
B
So it's actually insane that we were going on a wooden roller coaster. Yeah.
A
You had to do it. You just had.
B
You had to.
A
With a little funnel cake to top off today.
B
Works for me.
A
Anyways, Travis is going to be experiencing all these memories and more as the new ambassador of Six Flags. I can't wait to see Taylor there. And I'm sorry if he doesn't bring Taylor to Six Flags. Not like he's not serious about the brand.
B
I hope they bring back their commercials. That was like a core part of our childhood was all the commercials and they were kind of very culturally iconic and relevant.
A
Yeah. Let's see what's in store. I like this.
B
And I think we should bring back theme parks. I don't think they ever went out of style, but, like, kids are just like always on their phones. Like, you know what, why don't you leave your phone at home and go to the theme park for the day? Eat. Get sick from eating and. Yeah, like, that's. That's good old fashioned fun. It's good for the mental health. I know kids are all obsessed with mental health these days. Go to the theme park. It'll fix everything.
A
It's true. Are you ready for our.
B
I sound like one of those, like, toxic adults. Oh, you're anxious. Just calm down.
A
Like, yeah, don't worry.
B
Oh, you're fine.
A
Don't worry about it. Drink some water.
B
How about this?
A
Don't worry.
B
Don't worry about it. Don't worry about a thing.
A
You ready for our third story? Livy Dunn is joining the Baywatch reboot. She's beginning a new acting career and it will begin with a role in the Baywatch reboot, which is a great way to begin an acting career for Libby Dunn.
B
Yes. Unfortunately, I feel, and this is absolutely zero shade to let me down. I think she's great and, like, I love this for her, but I already had, like, a lot of suspicions about this sort of cursed franchise. And I do feel like they're doing a little bit too much and, like, I'm more sure than ever that the show's going to be bad.
A
Sorry, is that a set that you're wearing?
B
It is.
A
It's very cute.
B
Thank you so much.
A
Little cable knit.
B
Yeah. Shorts. I would get a sweater set, but
A
no, no, you don't need to.
B
Yeah, so I'm wearing.
A
It's from aloe.
B
It's a cable knit. It's actually cashmere. Like, aloe doesn't make athleisure anymore. They, like, switched to making high fashion. You see how they make, like, leather purses now? Oh, yeah. It's weird. It's like, not a store for, like, leggings anymore. It has matching shorts. Yeah.
A
It's so cute.
B
Thanks so much. I'll be sure to link it on my shop. My.
A
Yeah. For sure. Yeah, I'll take one.
B
Yeah.
A
Anyways, back to Olivia Dunn. You know what I'm really into? Not just like, the baby watch, reboot, like, whatever the show is gonna be. I'm loving the news. You know what I mean?
B
Yeah, of course. We're more excited about the releases.
A
Yeah. Who else is gonna be in it? Also, I need to say Hassie Harrison is in Yellowstone. Did you see our comments where it blazed?
B
I saw, like, one comment, and I know who she is now. The guy Ryan.
A
Yeah, I know who she is now, too. I'm surprised we didn't recognize her.
B
She's. Whatever. What do they used to call the bunny?
A
Bunny hoppers.
B
Yeah. She was like a bunny hopper who found love in the Yellowstone barn.
A
Little bunny hop, hop, hop.
B
And then they're married in real life.
A
Bunny. Barn. Bunny.
B
Okay.
A
Bunny, babe.
B
Okay.
A
What's the word?
B
I thought we decided it was a bunny hopper. No, it's a bunny hopper now.
A
Okay. But you guys know.
B
Yeah. You know what we're talking about.
A
I'm so. What?
B
Bubble bunny. Oh, buckle. Yeah, Buckle bunny.
A
Because you just, like, undo the buck.
B
I don't know.
A
You just, like, do stuff of the rodeo.
B
Yeah. Like, you only date cowboys, like, for fun.
A
Yeah. But you also are in the rodeo yourself.
B
Yeah. Like, you're like a groupie. It's a groupie for the rodeo.
A
Okay. Love it.
B
Yeah.
A
So Livy Dunn will be in Baywatch.
B
Amazing.
A
Great. More. I love the stories about Baywatch casting. Great job.
B
Is it your new Annie Live?
A
It's the new Annie Live. It's sexy Annie Live.
B
Yucky.
A
It's the sexy version of Annie Live.
B
It's Annie grown up. But, like, it's Annie After Dark.
A
You guys, if you were not there for Annie Live and why we mean there.
B
By there, we mean here.
A
Here at the toes. For the year leading up to any live. Like, you missed out on the experience.
B
I was actually on tour when Annie Live was playing, and I was live. Yeah. When. When they were actually broadcasting the live performance, I was on stage. Like, we were talking about it the whole time. I was like, what's going on on Annie Live? It was like the Super Bowl.
A
Oh, my God. Seriously, take me back.
B
Yeah. Right? That was the last time I was truly happy. That was so funny. We just, like, couldn't stop reporting, like, all the updates. Like, you would have thought we had a gun to our head. The castings, the drama, the relationships, like, everything. We were the leading source, the leading news network on all things Annie Live. And I don't Know why? And then we did watch it. Of course, I had to watch it late because I was on stage when it was being broadcast and it was live. It was amazing.
A
I loved it.
B
The dog was amazing.
A
What about three bucks, two bags, one me.
B
Three bucks, two bags, one me? That was good harmony. Yeah.
A
You guys. Oh, my gosh. We need more lives. Like, yes.
B
I miss that era so much.
A
Grease Live so bad. It never goes well. Everybody hates.
B
Except everybody loved the Wiz. That was, like, the one that wasn't bad.
A
Thankless.
B
Yeah.
A
You will get nothing and you probably won't get another role.
B
Vanessa Hudgens literally, like, performed at the night her father died. Like, it was so high school. Mistakes.
A
It was. I think. What was the other live. I was just thinking of Hairspray. Oh, Hairspray.
B
Ariana was Penny Pinkleton.
A
Like, you had to be there. And it was so bad that I actually don't think there's, like, a. A version you can watch now. Like, unless you DVR'd it.
B
Peter Pan Live starring Alison Williams.
A
I think it ruined her career.
B
Definitely didn't help.
A
It's a career. And the girl who played Tracy Turnbull Turnblad for Hairspray Live never saw her again.
B
Well, the thing is about the role of Tracy Turnblad after the original role of Ricki Lake, whose career made it, is a cursed role. That's why I actually don't ever watch.
A
Always cast in Unknown. So it's like, this might be the only role you get.
B
Yeah. And it's not a particularly flattering role. Like, Tracy's sort of like the butt of the show, you know, but you
A
get to show off your chops.
B
Yeah. So it's actually insane how good Nikki Blonsky was like. I know. It's like a joke. Hey. It's like, from Hairspray and she's like a toothless wonder now, but, like, it's actually insane. She was operating at a level unbeknownst to the culture.
A
Like, it took everything from her, you
B
know, it left nothing.
A
Yeah.
B
Like, it is the best singing, acting, dancing, just, like, overall performing I've ever seen.
A
Yeah.
B
That's what's so crazy about it.
A
Yeah. So please bring back lives.
B
Yes.
A
That was so.
B
And, you know, I long to be a part of something and watch everyone watching something live. The live element. You had to watch it live because it was so high stakes.
A
And some of them went off without a hitch. Like, no one's career was ruined. Like Carrie Underwood and the Sound of Music.
B
Oh, yeah. That one was sort of Like, I don't think a lot of people watched it. Like, it wasn't newsmaking.
A
Yeah. But it went off.
B
Okay, so it was an NBC thing, right? They should do Wicked live.
A
Yeah.
B
Oh, my God, I love that.
A
They should do the Greatest Showman live.
B
They should. We have ideas. Hire us. We'll be like that. We'll be consultants for the project, and
A
then we'll report on every single cast, built in promo. It's amazing.
B
It's a win, win.
A
Are you ready for our fourth story, which is going to lead into our Beverly Hills recap? Yes, because. So funny. Last night, the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills stars attended an opera.
B
You're kidding. Oh, on the show. Oh, I didn't watch.
A
Wait, you didn't watch?
B
No. I asked you last night, are we watching Salamao or Real Housewives of Beverly Hills? You said Beverly Hills, and I said, okay, I'm watching Salama.
A
Oh, I figured that meant that you were just watching both.
B
No. And the last couple of episodes were, like, sort of meh.
A
Well, now they're in Italy.
B
Okay.
A
Oh, my God.
B
And they went to an opera.
A
This. Well, the villa has its own theater.
B
Yes, it does.
A
And not just a movie theater, a stage. And they put on an opera, which was just so funny, considering opera. So in zeitgeist. And we see, like, Sutton, like, an amazing. Yeah, I thought it was hysterical. Amanda Francis is, like, on her phone. Sutton was so rude. Sutton said that she falls asleep at the opera and she's like, a fancy lady. So she's just not for the opera, which is fine.
B
I also want to say I feel like opera.
A
And Bose is saying she's like, I love the opera. I'm actually on the board of the LA Opera brand board. And it literally felt like this episode was put together in the last week in response to Timothy.
B
That's so funny.
A
Kyle's, like, filming. We're seeing everyone how they engage with the opera.
B
What about Kathy Hilton?
A
Kathy Hilton. You know, she sat.
B
Yeah.
A
Erica loves.
B
Yeah.
A
Jennifer Tilly's mother was an opera singer, so she said she loves the opera. I believe that we literally got every single woman's thought on the opera before Timothy.
B
Unbridled thoughts.
A
I genuinely think they had to have edited the episode this week. It was so brilliant. Then Jennifer Tilly comes out singing. She sings like an opera singer. She used to, like, sit at the piano with her mother and sing opera. Like, everyone has. Has a connection to opera, positive or negative.
B
Do we have a connection to opera? Aside from the fact that, like, I Could have been an opera singer in another life.
A
No. Maybe we should go to the opera.
B
I just feel like opera singers, female opera singers, like, are busty by nature. I don't know if it's something about, like, the breathing or the corset. And I do feel like if I was born in another era, like, I would have sort of had to have become just due to my voice and my breasts.
A
Like, I see an opera.
B
Okay. Actually, with all this opera chatter, I did see a dm.
A
I didn't open it.
B
From the Metropolitan Opera in the city asking if we wanted to come. Well, if I meant to respond to
A
it, but South Floridian opera that would like to have.
B
No, I'll be back in New York
A
soon, so, like, to have me.
B
I would like to wear a gown or, like. Can you wear leggings to the opera? You, like, can't.
A
I don't think you can. I think that's what's great. Like, even when we went to the Nutcracker, everyone dressed up. I wore a hilly.
B
Yeah.
A
Amazing. And everyone else was so dressed to the nines.
B
Maybe I'll put on, like, trousers.
A
Yeah. Like, that is. We need to bring back that.
B
Agreed.
A
And we also need to thank Timothy.
B
It's true.
A
I also saw a theory that whoever unearthed this clip from the interview that was, like, two weeks ago that came
B
and went, and it was such a long interview where, like, a lot more buzzy moments happened, that it's one of
A
his ops for Best Actor that sort of dug this up and disseminated it to cancel Timothy.
B
I'm sorry if this is the thing. Like, does. Does this sort of impact Oscar voting? Oscar voting's over.
A
Look at Carlos Sofia.
B
Yeah, I guess. But, like, I could. Was. Did Carlos Sofia sweep every award before the Oscars? Like, Timothy has won every single award
A
except for the SAG Award and BAFTAs. He didn't win.
B
Yes. I thought he won everything.
A
No, he. The last couple he lost, he won the Golden Globes to win. But if he had, like, a major scandal right now.
B
But it's not a major scandal.
A
No, but if he had a. Like, a major scandal right now, I do not think that the Oscars would have him win.
B
Right. Like, if somebody, like. Like, it came out and, like, accused
A
him of something, it was, like, really terrible. So I guess, like, he must be a perfect person if this is the worst thing that. That they could find on him. Yeah, but I just thought that was an interesting theory.
B
Yeah.
A
That someone's trying to cancel him so they could win the Oscar. I mean, giving, like, Nancy Kerrigan about to the knees, you know, like, he's Nancy.
B
Yeah. This is so Tanya, and there's a
A
Tanya out there that we need to find. I. Tanya.
B
I. Tanya.
A
Yeah. That was a crazy movie. Yeah, I saw that one.
B
It was good.
A
It was.
B
Why do you think it was crazy? It was a crazy story.
A
It was just, like, crazy that we need, like, Tanya Harding. Like.
B
Yeah, no, it was kind of, like,
A
put a hit out on Nancy Kerrigan's leg so that she couldn't win.
B
It was like trying to garner sympathy for Tanya being, like, oh, well, she's poor, okay? Like, so poor people don't bash in other people's knees or her being poor. It was all about how, like, she had to grow up skating, practicing at the mall for the free. And, like, Nancy had a private coach,
A
so she deserved her knee bash.
B
Like, yeah, that was kind of like a big flop.
A
Classic Hollywood. They want you to see the other side. The other side?
B
Yeah.
A
The evil person.
B
I'm good.
A
It's just, like, not my favorite.
B
That's kind of how I felt about the Aaron Hernandez documentary. It was like, well, he's gay and he couldn't tell anyone, so that's why he killed his friend. And I'm like, okay. I feel like there are other ways to. Yeah. Come out. And I actually feel like the gay community was like, please exclude us from this narrative. Like, it was just kind of blaming the fact that he was, like, closeted and football is, like, toxic for gay people, and that's why he had to kill his friend. I didn't like that documentary in terms of that, but I learned a lot.
A
Yeah, that's one of my least favorite tropes. Oh, also, I was thinking of you on Beverly Hills last night because Erica referenced your. Your favorite documentary.
B
Three Identical Strangers.
A
No, that's my favorite.
B
What is my favorite Joan Rivers piece of work. No, wait, let me think.
A
True. Think Blackfish.
B
No, I have a lot of favorite documentaries.
A
Think, like, Cult. Cult. Because they're talking about Amanda being in a cult.
B
What's my favorite cult documentary? Eat Sweet, Praying Obey. Whatever that one's called.
A
Mother God. Oh, my God. The Silver Woman.
B
I literally blocked out that documentary that was like, turn. And I watched you pregnant. I was obviously, like, scraping the bottom of the barrel, because when I was pregnant, I watched everything, so I had, like, nothing left to watch. And somebody, Remy Bader, was, like, posting on her stories about this hbo. Max. Mother Earth. What did Erica say?
A
Oh, my God. Well, she was saying how Amanda Francis was talking about being in a cult, and I don't know what the women were trying to say in their confessionals, but just sort of. That, like, her story sort of ends. She ran away in the night and that's that on that. And then she just had to, like, threaten the pastor to get him the ordained, and they stopped bothering her. And then Erica was like, you know, when you think of cold, you think of Charles Manson. You know, I saw Mother God. The woman turned silver and they're carrying around her dead body.
B
Oh, my God. Erica's so real for that.
A
So funny in her conventional.
B
I wish I watched this episode because also. But, you know, Ben's obsessed with the real houses in Beverly Hill, so I have to watch every episode with him. And he watched that documentary with me, and he actually did not forgive me for, like. Like, four days for making him watch it.
A
Well, now it. All your hard work pays off because you'll have a nice laugh.
B
The silver woman. Yes. And they did. They, like, kept her body alive in a hotel room. And then the hotel was like, we're a little suspicious. Like, can you. Can we come in? And they were like, no, you can't come in. So they smuggled her body out in a tarp and buried her out in the woods. And they were waiting because, like, obviously the point of the cult was that when Mother Earth died, we give her back to the earth. And then, like, basically, like, the Messiah comes or whatever. And they, like, left. Like, she died. They gave her back to the earth and nothing happened. And we just had to, like. It was just, like, awkward. Like, it was just, like. It was very disappointing for those people.
A
Yeah. So I don't know if they were trying to say, like, Amanda. I don't know what they were trying to say, but they just said her cold stories, like, not that crazy.
B
Yeah. And I think maybe they were expecting,
A
like, just something crazier.
B
She might have just sort of been a part of, like, a deeply religious, zealot community.
A
Yeah.
B
And, like, made the choice to leave, which I'm sure was really hard. But it's not necessarily like a cult.
A
Yeah. Yeah. I guess like, a cult is like, you know, an open end. Determined people use it, like, very generously sometimes, you know, they call the show a cult.
B
They do call the show a cult. And we are be sure to head over to patreon.com to buy your membership into our cult
A
also. So they're in Italy. The villa is so, so gorgeous.
B
Gorgeous.
A
It's so gorgeous. And, you know, I don't have like, wanderlust at all, but it was, like, actually making me want to go to Italy. They were eating olive oil right off the olive tree, like, right over there. And, like, I want to taste that now. Are there any olive trees in the
B
U.S. i'm sure there are, but I'm sure they're disgusting.
A
Why would they be disgusting if it's an olive tree? Like, the same, I'm down to clown.
B
It's not the same. If you're asking me to go to Italy, I will go.
A
Like, it looked so amazing. Rachel and Dorit are just like my faves right now. Rachel was sharing house, so she's gone. Roger's with the one son. The other son is at his best friend's house. The younger son is with Roger. And he, like, sat him down and told him that he has a girlfriend friend, like, while she's gone. Then the sun, like, calls Rachel, but she's sleeping because of the time difference. And then when she finally sees his thing, then he's sleeping. She doesn't like the name. She's like, gonna jump out of her skin. Her injury are flipping that this happened. I just, like, I felt so, so bad.
B
Roger's like, not a good guy.
A
Yeah.
B
It's actually insane how, like, crazy people become when they get divorced. That's sort of the theme of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. It's like these men having midlife crises and they're all very wealthy men, so they do then go on to, like, date young, hot things. And it's not because they're interesting or good looking. It's because that they're wealthy. And it just like, is a real. You know, how. Do you ever see that Adam Driver Scarlett Johansson movie where, like, a marriage story where they walk you through a divorce?
A
I didn't see it, but I.
B
Well, people say it's like it was so well received because it was very relatable how, like, when you decide to divorce someone, you become. They become, and I'm sure you to them a completely different person, an actual enemy. And it was very hyper realistic. Like, you almost wish that person was dead dead. Like, you hate them so much. And I feel like real houses in the Beverly Hills recently has become like a marriage story. Like, you're watching these men and again, we're only seeing it from the women's perspective. But I believe it, you know, But
A
I just like the blatant, like, go divorce and like, move on with your life and have a girlfriend, whatever. But, like, protect your kids as much as you possibly can insulate them from everything as much as you can. Yeah, like don't bring the girlfriend for camp drop off. They're about to go away for a month and you're about to drop this on them.
B
Yeah, why? No, that's bad guy.
A
Why?
B
That's bad guy.
A
You can have your summer with your girlfriend. Just wait five more minutes and leave her in the car.
B
Yeah.
A
So, okay, I guess we'll recap it whenever. Yes, whenever you watch.
B
Before we go on, let me let you know that the remainder of today's show is brought to you by Gold Bond and their fabulous line of scented hand creams that actually yes, we have all four scents.
A
Citrus Mood. This is Citrus Pop. It has vitamin C and green tea.
B
So let's use this opportunity to check in on our fellow swirlies. Take a look down at your hands. How do they look? You know, the winter season, the constant hand washing. Hopefully your hands can become dry. Sad. Begging for hydration. And one of those things like when we think about like we take care of our skin, we take care of like our or trying to drink a lot of water. We have a lot of hair care. I feel like our hands sometimes do get forgotten about. And I really like Gold Bond's line of hand creams because first of all, they come in four delicious scents. I've got got Vanilla Dream. What I use almost most frequently is Cedar Rain.
A
I'm a Cedar Rain.
B
If you sort of girl, you know, green is like kind of my color.
A
Yeah.
B
Fun fact about me, Floral Bloom. And then Jackie has the Citrus Pop.
A
I'm a citrus Girl.
B
So each cream is formulated with skin loving ingredients to keep your hands looking and feeling their best. They come in four amazing scents which make moisturizing feel less like a chore and more like a tiny luxury moment. So it's, they're really the perfect size. I would say it's smaller than the phone. So perfect for on the go hydration. Keep one in your bag, one in your desk in the car. They're also perfect for gifting a little desk drawer restock. If you have a co worker who you just want to like send some love to give them a hand cream. I feel like people who work in offices always need hand cream. The air conditioning can be very drying
A
and if you have a desk like you need to be keeping a hand cream in there.
B
So Vanilla Dream is very softening. It's made with shea butter to boost moisture and cocoa butter to help smooth and soften your hands. It's very cozy aesthetic, very candlelit. Evening energy. And then there's floral bloom, which is the pink one that I have right here. It's lightweight. It's hydrating with jojoba niacinamide to help restore your skin's moisture barrier.
A
So that's.
B
This one feels very fresh and soft. And then citrus pop, which is what Jackie has. It is for people who want to glow. It has vitamin C. I love to glow. Which helps visibly brighten and even your tone. Plus green tea to help protect your skin from environmental stressors. It's very. It's good for like a morning pick me up. And then cedar rain, which is what I use is refreshing and soothing with aloe to invigorate and vitamin E to help soothe your skin. It feels very spa adjacent, so it's very chic. It's very calming. What we love is that no matter which one you grab, you're getting hydration that actually lasts. Costs plus targeted skin benefits. So it's such an easy way to take care of your hands throughout the day without even thinking about it. So we put it on while we're answering emails, sitting in traffic while we're podcasting. Just little moments of self care that really add up. So if your hands are feeling dry and crusty or you just want a cute, effective hand cream that actually does something, this is your sign to pick up the Gold Bond ones. They fit perfectly in your purse. So you can chop all the Gold Bond scented hand creams now on Amazon. As always, use as directed. All four scents are available on Amazon. Highly recommend.
A
Also, they're free from parabens for lathylates and dyes.
B
Love, love.
A
If that's important to you, which it is to me.
B
The cedar rain. Yeah, I guess like it being. I guess that's why I like it. You know, I love a massage and
A
this feels like what they use and like a mini massage. You can't have a massage all the time.
B
Skincare tip. When you take a little too much, which I just did.
A
Elbows.
B
Don't forget the wienas.
A
Oh, I always do my elbows because they're really dry and my self tanner gets stuck there if I don't moisturize.
B
Hyruji. Well, thank you, Goldman for sponsoring today's episode.
A
Thank you so much. I love the hand cream break. I always love it.
B
It's kind of nice built in.
A
Yeah.
B
And today, like I said, bombshell episode. We need to be hydrated.
A
Our fifth and final story. Slammu recap and news. Couple things. Couple things.
B
Dropped all 10 episodes. I've only watched one I'm gonna watch a bunch over the weekend.
A
I've watched 20 minutes, but the stage is set. Mormon Wives star Michaela Matthews splits from her husband Jace Terry, amid their intimacy issues. So I'm sure this season will show us more of the devolution of their
B
marriage, which is just crazy, because if you had told me, you're like, once they drop the new season, we're gonna find out a couple get divorced. I'm like, well, it's obviously Jesse and Jordan, and I'm so champion. Like, I know they have young kids, and I. People should, like, work as hard as they can at that stage to stay together. I do feel like they work hard. I do feel like he's actually just a bad guy, and I do really want her to get away from him. Like, he really scares me. He has really sinister energy. And the first episode, he's, like, taking it upon himself to, like, make dad talk a thing. And I know they all started making tik toks together, I think, just, like, for fun, like, maybe to get a couple of brand deals, like, to start earning money. But he's like, no.
A
He really thinks he's doing something.
B
No, but not only that. His reasonings for it is, like, really, like, Danish.
A
I. We're doing it so we can show
B
the stand on our own two feet.
A
So we can show the girls that they don't have a monopoly on social media.
B
They do, actually.
A
And go get a job. So fucking lame. You're doing it to show your wife that she's actually not that cool and anybody can do this.
B
Like, And I guess, like, his big get was that, like, he got his manager to, like, call, whatever, to organize a trip for all the boys to go to Vanderpump Villa, which is so
A
loser, because I don't need him to hate Marciano or. But, like, I'm sorry if someone had an affair with your wife, like, you don't need to go on their show.
B
He's, like, so proud that he got this, and he's, like, trying to convince all the guys. And a lot of the girls, like, don't want their husbands to go. I do think a big group of them end up going. And if I was one of them, I would, like. First of all, I wouldn't encourage Jordan and his weird dad Tuck, like, chip. He has a chip on his shoulder.
A
You want to be famous so bad that you'll go to Italy to do the show with, like, the man that your wife was in love with, because you want to be on TV and you don't even care how, but he
B
wants to be on TV and like feel like he earned it outside of his wife and he didn't. I think a lot of the guys. Actually the show's really interesting because it's totally flipped like traditional gender roles and it's very cool to watch like a lot of these girls slay, slay, slay, make all the money and their husbands sort of slide into this sort of provider role. Like a lot of times when we're watching the dads are like holding the babies. Sorry, caregiver role, like domestic. The. A lot of times we're watching scenes and the guys are the ones holding the babies, feeding them and it's like nice to see that how they've all like, maybe they didn't envision that for their life, but I feel like Zach Affleck, Connor, they've all like sort of slowly I forget his name. But Macy's husband who I really like, like, they are more than happy to like play that part of being sort of like the stay at home dads and just like letting the wife make the money and them supporting in other ways. And Jordan like will not have it. Yeah, he will not have it. And I think he was the only one whose wife was out earning him before the show. No, not before social media. Like because she was the one with like the successful business.
A
He should be used to it.
B
Yeah, he like, he's not going quietly at, into like the sort of caregiver role.
A
Yeah.
B
And he's being so toxic. So beta, he got hair plugs. I hate him. Yeah, I hate him. I need Jesse to get away from him now.
A
Did they wind up? Well, I don't know if I feel that way because. And we'll talk about this with Michaela and Jace. So during last season, viewers watched as they discussed intimacy issues they were experiencing in their marriage while she was extremely pregnant. And they're trying to work on this.
B
Yeah, not the time.
A
In season four, it has Michaela sharing that there hasn't been a great deal of progress in working on the problem as she. She just had a baby and now is breastfeeding a baby and they're still having intimacy issues.
B
It's like just fuck off.
A
As she was newly postpartum and experiencing flare ups of her chronic illness. Now they have shared that they have split, but does this mean separated? Does this mean divorce? Like is it final?
B
It's not giving final.
A
Okay.
B
But it's giving like that they've decided to take a break.
A
Like Whitney and Connor and Jen And Zac, Ethan have shown me that anything is possible and that change is possible, and it makes me want to root for these, like, young couples with young families to stay together.
B
I agree. I feel that way about literally everyone except for Jordan and Jesse. The thing with Michaela and Jace is that the intimacy issues are rooted in her childhood trauma. And because they're both so young, she hasn't fully worked through it. And he does not have the emotional intelligence as a partner to. To support her in that way. To be intimate with somebody who experienced childhood sexual trauma, like, you have to be a very thoughtful, intelligent, emotionally intelligent type of person. And I just feel like he's not willing to put in the work and be that. He just wants her to get fixed, and once she's fixed, we can go back. But it's like he doesn't realize he has to be a part of the healing. So they are definitely at a little bit of a standstill.
A
Well, I feel like he's been, you know, patient with her, and they've been together for a long time. He is a lot older than her, so she. He should be, like, more. Yeah. Mature.
B
He should be.
A
And also people, like, sort of red flag there.
B
Really. Yes.
A
I think they got together. Like, she was.
B
She was underage. Yeah.
A
But they have three kids. Like, okay, they're married.
B
Yeah.
A
But. So I just don't understand, like, why now, like, if she's always, like, had this sort of guard up, like, why. Why is he giving up on her
B
now in the throes of pregnancy, postpartum, when, like, no one is at their best. Intimate wives.
A
Most intimate self. Yeah. Like, why can't we, like, put this on the shelf for the moment.
B
Yeah.
A
And then get back to, like, working on things. I don't know. Maybe I'll watch a season. I'll be like, oh, they had to split. But I'm. Things will have to be really bad between them for me to think that they should split up.
B
When they just had a baby.
A
When they just had a baby. They have three kids. They all. Throughout the show, they've seemed to be one of the better couples. Like, and of course, you know, what you see, we don't know, but, like, they seem just, like, happy and sweet and loving towards each other. And if he, like, really loves her and she's going through something, like, so difficult, like, you be there for her.
B
Yeah. No, it's definitely a red flag if,
A
like, like, I'm really annoyed with him.
B
Agreed.
A
And I understand it's probably hard for him. He's In a hard spot.
B
Lot.
A
But, like, not only has she been through so much. Last season, she was pregnant. This season she's postpartum, breastfeeding, bread, winning. Can you off for a second?
B
I agree.
A
Just can you all the way off for a second? And, like, let's circle back.
B
Circle back next year. Yeah. You know, when I was not expecting them to be the ones.
A
The ones. And I remember last season when Jesse and Jordan, like, had their bragus and everyone was, like, shook. You know, it shook the Montauk world. And those girls were saying, like, it makes you, like, look at your own marriage and make sure, like, your home is in order. And I was like, macy, you don't have to worry. Like, yeah, it was like, sorry. It was Macy and Michaela saying that, like, now we're, like, all worried. I'm like, well, you guys are fine. Yeah.
B
I do really like Michaela and her husband. I'm sorry. Macy and her husband. I think he's a good guy.
A
That's what you think? Jacob.
B
Jacob. Yes.
A
Yes. That's what. And I think so, too. But I thought, like, Michaela and Jace were, like, good. I thought we didn't have to worry.
B
Yeah, I. I think more so, like, I think maybe I thought that they were good, but I didn't think he was, like, like, an amazing, good husband. And I feel like with Jacob, I actually think he's, like, a very, very good husband.
A
Yeah. And Macy's been through a lot, too. Yes.
B
And when I hear her story, I'm like, oh, she got a good guy. Like, I'm happy for her.
A
You should support your partner. So it's hard for me to say without having watched this season, and maybe I'll. Maybe I'll see things differently, but right now I'm just like, please, like, we can. We can work it out.
B
Oh, and, like, Jordan's, like, the one who's, like, really, really friends with. With Dakota, who I think is, like, a really toxic guy, too. I mean, he's always the one, like, including. And, like, they are, like, the dad talk. And I'm like, well, they're. They both have, like, such bad motives to me.
A
No. And it's like, Jordan can't really align himself with Dakota because Dakota single, so Jordan can't move Dakota.
B
Jordan is obsessed with, like, getting all the guys to go to the villa and especially the single guys. He's like, oh, well, Mason's coming, but he has a girlfriend. It's like, dude, you're married, right?
A
What are you talking about himself with the single People, and then he'll start to behave like them. Like, if he was wanting to go to. To Vanderpump Villa with Jacob and Zach Affleck, then maybe things would be, oh,
B
wait, something really crazy. So they go to la, and Whitney is set up in her house, and they're getting ready for Dancing with the Stars. And they were talking to Jen and Zach and they, like, can't find a place to live. Like, all the Airbnbs, whatever. They're like, their plans are, like, just not working out. So Connor, like, sort of offhand is like, well, if you need a place to stay, you can stay with us for a couple of days. And so Jen, their kids, their nanny, her assistant all move into Whitney's rental for, like, a couple of days. So I don't know what ends up happening with them, but I know that, like, Jen hates Whit. And it's actually crazy because Whitney at, like, a very important, pivotal time in her life and she made the arrangements. Like, she. This is important to her. She got herself a house. Like, I don't know if the show pays for it. I think the show gives you a stipend, but I think they need, you know, more than a typical apartment.
A
Like Mass Singer.
B
Yeah, exactly. So, like, they made their own arrangements, and Jen just sort of, like, moves in, like, with the biggest moving truck you've ever seen in your whole life. Like, I thought that was really crazy.
A
He was like, sometimes the show.
B
Sometimes Connor's generosity, like, gets us in trouble. And I don't know if it was for. But it's actually insane that, like, Jen hates Whitney so much when, like, that's an incredibly generous thing to do. I would never.
A
Yeah, I'll. That is very nice of Whitney. I can imagine Jen. I'm sure stuff happened behind the scenes, but, like, they just had such different experiences on Dancing with the Stars.
B
Like, I could see her hating Whitney just for, like, thriving in a way that she couldn't.
A
Jealousy. But it's like, frustration at this show and the fan circumstances. And the circumstances. And. Yeah. And if. And I'm sure other stuff also happens. I don't think Jen would just be like, oh, well, she thrived and I'm jealous.
B
Yeah.
A
But that is nice that to start that they offered them.
B
It's so crazy.
A
And I just can't believe, like, Jen, we already said, like, especially when. Now I can speak my truth. When Claudia was doing Mass Singer, that was when Dancing with the Stars was airing and we were watching Jen, and I'm like, like, this girl has Two months behind me.
B
So I had a four and a half month old and I was in hell. She had a two and a half month.
A
Really?
B
Yeah. She's behind me because she just posted like eight months postpartum. I'm almost 10 months postpartum.
A
Got it. So she was two months postpartum. She has two other kids. She's moving her whole life. And Dancing with the Stars is like, so it's every single day. All day, every day. Just had two kids and you're telling me they didn't even have a home?
B
Insane.
A
I thought they did it. You know, they were set up like that. Not that it's ever going to be easy, but, like, if you're set up and you're parked and your kids have a house in a backyard and you can go to work, like, it's okay. They didn't even have a house.
B
Insane.
A
It's harder than I thought. And that's why I was, like, trying to just, like, give Jen so much grace because I'm like, this is so hard, what she's doing. And I feel bad for her. And I felt like she could never have passed up this opportunity, but it might have not been the right time. Agree. So that's just an empath in me.
B
Yeah. No. 100.
A
She's an empath. Oh, and crazy Dakota says that he slept with Taylor the night before she left to film for.
B
And then there's a scene in, like, the upcoming trailer. What's like coming up this season is like, it looks like they're in bed.
A
Yeah.
B
And at that point, like, I do have to unfortunately stop defending Taylor. Freaky Paul. Like, if that's the case after last season, like, the fact that she hasn't washed her hands of him is the biggest red flag. And that doesn't make me. That doesn't bode well for her season of the Bachelor.
A
For her openness to find the love of her life. Committed partner, if even openness.
B
I believe she's open. I don't think she's ready. Like, I don't think she's emotionally mature enough.
A
No. She couldn't. Even if the perfect guy came right up to her.
B
Oh.
A
And introduced himself, she would be like, where's Dakota?
B
And then she's, like, starting to see someone. She met him on Tik Tok Live. She, like, was scrolling. Tik Tok saw this guy singing. Yeah. Really bad. But I do feel like he's one of the contestants. He looked like one of the pictures.
A
Yikes. She picks him up at the airport and Chase.
B
Chase, question mark.
A
He's, like, in love with her, helping her move out.
B
Yeah. I don't know.
A
Know. I'm surprised he didn't go on the Bachelor.
B
Yeah.
A
Maybe he tried. He should have. That's what I meant. When we got her cast, I was like, I'm surprised. There's no, like, other storylines here.
B
Yeah.
A
Yeah.
B
But they're. They're really doing a good job, or at least trying all the Hulu shows to, like, connect them with one another. And so the Vanderpump Villa. But I do feel like Vanderpump Villa is not a popular show, and they kind of need to stop forcing it. If it weren't for that one episode where the Mormon wise went, I don't know if they even would have gotten renewed. So now it's like, the guys are going, and it's like, I appreciate the synergy, but with this particular show, like, nobody cares.
A
Yeah. And it's like, all I want to know is what happened at Vanderpump Villa. But I can't just watch it.
B
I won't. I won't watch it.
A
It's like, even last season when all I wanted was, like, more housewives. Mormon Housewives. I was. It never even occurred to me just to watch it. Watch their episode.
B
Demi was on this episode. It was, like, weird. Even though I was under the impression that she's not a part of the show anymore. Maybe she lives in the middle also.
A
Did you see the opening credits?
B
Yeah. Taylor's up.
A
Wait. But I thought it was so weird. First they're, like, in cream dresses. They do half the cast, and then they change into these, like, blue dresses.
B
And I thought it was weird because they do, like, how in Housewives, like, there's. Everyone's holding an apple, and every season, it's like, Taylor's always in the middle, but they're all, like, at this one, Taylor's up on a platform, and they're all underneath her.
A
Like, I thought it was weird, but why did they switch color dresses? It was, like, going really partial aesthetically. And then they went into these, like, corny princess dresses. First it was like, cornfield, like, Cree, you know, of the land. Natural.
B
And I would have thought, like, maybe in the beginning seasons, like, Taylor was so much. But now, like, especially Whitney's there. I really see them all as equal now.
A
Yeah.
B
Some maybe less than others. I feel like Miranda, maybe Layla, like, is on a lower tier, but, like, for the most part, they all are fairly. And actually, Layla was slaying last night. She was like, I just don't know how to tell Jesse. I hate Jordan. And she just did, Like, I loved it. Like, actually, she's the only one is doing anything about, like, this really just bad guy in our midst. Yeah.
A
So we'll see about Tailored and Dakota. Because at this point, it's like, maybe just be with Dakota.
B
Yeah. If you can't, not if you cannot,
A
like, be together, that's great. Forever, like, great. And you love kids and you can't quit each other. So just be together.
B
Yeah.
A
Forgive each other. Truly move on tabular ass and be together because you love each other and you have a family. Like, maybe try that. But let's see how it goes on the Bachelorette.
B
Jackie and I will watch the remaining as many as we can this weekend. So come back Monday for, like, a big recap. But let's dive into Queenie and Weenie, which I'm really excited about. Queenie and Weenie, our weekly segment. Every Friday, we like to wrap up the show with a little bit of a Queenie and Weenie, where we give out two awards to people this week who acted in Queenie and Weenie like, behaviors. As always, let's start with Queenie. Jackie, would you like to go first?
A
Yes. My Queenie is something I happened to us this weekend that we didn't even talk about, but I think it was, like, taking over the Internet, and we haven't even. Where did we address it? I don't know, but my Queenie is the toaster who got us foot massages at the beach.
B
Yes. We didn't talk about it, but her tik tok went viral.
A
Her tik tok went viral. And we experienced it on the other end. We were just, like, at the beach. We didn't even know that this was a service, but a masseuse came over, and she was like, I'm here to give you a massage.
B
So we were ready to book. We, like, got our wallets.
A
Yeah.
B
We were like, oh, cool.
A
Like, yeah, we'd love one.
B
And she two hour back, or she's
A
like, I have for Jackie and Claudia.
B
She, like, was note like a hand.
A
We're like, oh, my God, Our husband's got us massages.
B
She was like, he felt so special.
A
She's like, someone who loves you. And then she gave us this note. It was from a toaster. And the masseuse was telling us, like, that she wanted to gift us a massage. And she also, like, wanted to come over and say hi, but it didn't seem like a good time.
B
We had all the kids with us.
A
So she was gonna wait and come over later. We're so like, yeah, tell her to come over later. And she never came over and said and introduced herself.
B
She just gave us each 15 minute
A
foot rubs and it was so amazing.
B
It was.
A
She is my Queenie because that was just like the highlight of my weekend.
B
I love that. I'm so glad you brought that up. My Queenie is a woman named Mishear Fox. Do you know her? You're gonna love her. A New York woman dug for three weeks to find her own diamond for her engagement ring. So what would you do to find your perfect engagement ring? For Mashir Fox, a 31 year old strategy consultant from New York City, it meant camping out for three weeks at Crater of Diamonds State park in Arkansas with a shovel and a mission to dig up her own.
A
Can anybody do that?
B
I guess. She said she'd been dreaming of finding her own ethically sourced gem about two years ago.
A
Not lab grown.
B
And she said we're not getting engaged until I do that. That's what she told her boyfriend. They come from the ground. What's stopping us from just getting one ourselves? She's like Miles Teller's grandma. After researching, she discovered that the only active public diamond mine in the world wasn't overseas, but just a short flight away. Fox headed south after finishing grad school, staying in a tent and digging daily from 8 to 4pm taking only one day off. The summer heat was brutal. She admits she was physically unprepared. There were days where I wouldn't shower for several days, she said. By the time I got out, I was so tired and hurt I couldn't muster the energy to spend 10 minutes undressing and taking a shower. She says her shovel was even stolen at one point, forcing her to walk three hours round trip to the nearest hardware store. On July 29, her final day, she went out.
A
She couldn't can Uber.
B
She's in the middle of like this random field. She went out and one last time and noticed a glimmer by her foot. I thought it was due, she said. I potted it with my hiking back boot and it didn't move. It turned out to be a 2.3 carat diamond, the third largest ever discovered in the park. Crater of Diamond State park averages one to two diamond finds per day. Most are small. Only about a dozen exceed one carat annually. According to the assistant park superintendent, Waymond Cox, she hasn't had her diamond appraised yet and doesn't plan to. For her, the value Lies in what the stone represents.
A
Yeah, that's really great.
B
And here. That's it. That's it. Like, raw.
A
I see. So, yeah, two carats. I was gonna ask, like, what the size was. I just have, like, two questions. She's very pretty, too.
B
Her boyfriend's name is Trevor.
A
Why didn't she make him dig? Like, that's love. Go dig me a diamond.
B
I'm cracking.
A
Why is she digging her own? These women do too much. Did she propose to herself, too?
B
The women do too much.
A
And, like, what's wrong with Lab Grown?
B
Well, I think that a huge reason why Lab Grown is so popular is because how diamonds are sourced is really.
A
I saw the funniest meme that was, like, a person with a huge diamond ring, and they're like, you'll never know. It's not.
B
Oh, my God. Well, part of the reason my lab is so popular is, like, because there's not any, you know, Nefarious.
A
Yeah.
B
Origins.
A
So I saw that movie Blood Diamond. Oh, my God, that movie, too.
B
One of the worst. Like, a great movie. I wish I never saw it.
A
Stuck with you. Of course.
B
That scene of the kid getting injected with heroin. Like, seriously, Kill me. One of the worst movies.
A
Maybe that's why she saw the movie and was like, I will not.
B
We're heading to Arkansas.
A
Yeah, I'll get my own.
B
That's a queenie right there.
A
Yeah, but did she say why? Lab wasn't good enough for her.
B
Maybe she wanted natural. She didn't want the strings that come with perhaps this being a blood diamond. So she minded herself.
A
Yeah, well, she should have said her Manson. That's my only. Yeah, do what you want for Weenie. Two things. My weenie is Jordan. Because the way he was acting on last night's episode, like, was complete weenie behavior. Like, trying to outshine his wife. It's like, bro. No. And even if you could, like, get a job to do that to their wife.
B
Yeah, right.
A
Take away. You know what I mean?
B
He's a real narcissist.
A
But what was so funny is last night in Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Sutton called Amanda weenie.
B
You're kidding.
A
I was, like. I was listening, and I was like, to Zach, like, what did she say? Call her. And he was like, a weenie. She was like, don't be a weenie. I don't believe you. Yeah. Sutton.
B
That's Queenie. Sutton.
A
Queenie Sutton. And I'm not gonna make a man of my weenie. No, no. It's like, honestly, so funny. I'm so fatigued. Fatigued by Amanda France.
B
Me too.
A
And the conversations around her. I know you're about to drop your bombshell, but I just. I wanted to know. Last night, watching Amanda, like, I'm. I'm very tired, exhausted by it. Like, the storyline has run its course. I feel bad for her. I don't know what she's doing there. I guess people online are being mean to her. I don't have anything, like, mean to say. And you're just tired. I don't mind her at all. I just like, she. It's like two separate, complete, separate story lines are happening. And I just like, I. She seems tired too. I felt bad.
B
It's not a good fit.
A
I don't think so.
B
So my weenie, AKA my bombshell, goes out to the person who left this note on my windshield yesterday. Many three year olds have trouble staying within the lines. Maybe if you practice coloring this cat, it will help you with your parking. Wow.
A
Here, here.
B
So. So let me tell you.
A
Is it anyone in this room?
B
Well, I did come in and I started asking questions, and let me tell you, you're gonna love this. So this morning, yesterday, I actually, I parked here, and then I was driving around all day. I didn't park anywhere else. A few hours later, I didn't even see the note until two hours later, they put it, like, the top of my windshield. I don't know if they didn't want me to see it or something. And then it started raining and it started sliding down. I said, what the hell is that? And I was like, oh, my God. The only place I parked today was here. Now, when I left, I did notice my wheel was on the line. I'm sorry, if you're on the line, you're fine. It was not veering. My wheel was online. So I'm like, is that what they were referring to? And it was parked between two cars. One car was a blue Mazda. We know that's been from the studio. The other, and I remember thinking was a white Tesla.
A
No, no, no, it was me, Jackie.
B
I remember walking by this car and, like, actually being like, it was pretty much totaled. Like, it was the bones of a vehicle. It looked like it had been through an incinerator. It had no handles on any of the doors. It was covered in rubber rust. The entire, like, left side, the side that I walked by looked like it had been hit in like, maybe six or seven accidents. The bumper was completely half off. I was like, how did this car even get here? So I presume it was the owner of that car who left this on my windshield. And I just, I'm shocked that first of all, I didn't know that we were like, like actual losers who walked around with cars. Because he must have had them on, right?
A
That's the thing. It's not like he wrote you a note, like, park better.
B
Like you placed an order.
A
He placed an order for these. You carry these around to let anyone know who's remotely outside the line. He's using them too liberally. He's going to run out.
B
He's using them too liberally. And the crazy thing is that, like, you thought about all of this. You bought the cards. You literally have so much time on your hands, but you don't have the time to get your car fixed, fix
A
your car, put a handle on, like, all those accidents on your car, like, weren't just the other person.
B
They're not an endorsement of great driving.
A
Right?
B
So. And I've actually never had anybody put a thing on my car, so I've never experienced what it would feel like. And I can tell you it actually felt like very invasive. Like, yeah, that there's my car seat in there. Like, that's my car. That's like. I feel like I've been burglarized. Like, I wasn't aware of any drama. I wasn't aware of, like the feelings that it would feel like to have somebody touch my car.
A
And obviously such an unhinged person. Now let me ask you a question. Do you think that came from a man or a woman? We're saying he. I kind of think it's she.
B
No, because you want to know why? Look, it has this thing. So that means he kept them in his car. And it has like a line down the middle. So it was kept in his wallet. And only men have wallets where like you need to.
A
That's true, but like only women.
B
No, this is absolutely man. But the cat with the comic sans,
A
like, cat is giving woman.
B
The cat is giving weenie, actually. So I don't care. It's a genderless non binary.
A
I'm just wondering if we could potentially. And then today, when I got here, cameras.
B
Today, that's what I asked, if we had cameras. We don't. Today when I got here, I drove around the parking lot a couple times looking for the car because it's so recognizable. And I was gonna put this back.
A
Back.
B
I'm going to keep it, actually.
A
No, when you see the car again, you will leave it on his car. Yeah, of course.
B
I drove around today looking for it. But, like, I couldn't believe I got my first. And let me tell you, I have parked some really annoying bad ways. Actually. I'm always remarking on how the spots here are very generous.
A
Yeah, there's not really a bad way to park here.
B
I did not park badly. Like, I didn't deserve the note. And there are times when I deserve the note. And I would have laughed, but I'm like, are you kidding me? Get your dirty fingernails off of my car.
A
Car.
B
Mind your own business. Take your car to the shop and all the way off.
A
Yeah.
B
Weenie.
A
So what he said was, good luck trying to drive. Good job trying to drive. Yeah.
B
And I wanted to say.
A
Remember when that kid said that to me? No. When I tried to parallel park here and her mom had to come and
B
do get in the car for you?
A
Yeah, in the car for me. And left me with her kids. And I was like, well, she's not gonna steal my car because I have her kids. And then when it was all said and done, the kid was like, to me, good job trying to drive. She ate with that bestie. That's. And I said, say less, bestie.
B
Thus concludes a very long episode. So we are gonna let you guys go. Thank you so much for listening to the toast on landing morning. Sure. We deliver the fastest stories you need to know. So if you watch this on YouTube, please subscribe this video.
A
Thumbs up when everything is a lot. An alafi. Is anything an alafi?
B
I don't know.
A
You know, if they're always a nice long one for you, then are they even long anymore?
B
If that's standard, are they just being. Happy Friday. Have an amazing weekend, guys, and we'll see you on Monday.
A
Love ya. Bye.
B
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Hosts: Jackie & Claudia Oshry
Date: March 13, 2026
This lively Friday episode of The Toast is a true "bombshell": from recapping sensational reality TV, to dissecting viral internet outrage, reliving amusement park nostalgia, and spotlighting personal drama from the hosts themselves. Jackie and Claudia bounce through a fast-paced mix of trending news, pop culture, deep dives into TikTok drama, and their own brand of comedic banter, maintaining the signature warm, sarcastic, "besties catching up" tone.
(03:07–04:26)
Secret Lives of Mormon Wives (Slammu) & Real Housewives of Beverly Hills
(12:31–65:44)
(18:43–27:57)
(27:57–32:58)
(33:14–38:44)
(39:13–48:54)
(52:08–65:44)
(65:44–74:10)
This "bombshell" Friday Toast episode was packed with sharp commentary on reality TV, internet culture, personal anecdotes, and signature irreverent humor. Whether musing on foot massages from a secret fan, revealing confessions about celebrity feuds, or laughing at petty parking wars, Jackie and Claudia serve up a perfectly swirled blend of pop culture, personal touch, and bestie banter.