Taking Accountability on the Road: Wednesday, January 14th, 2026

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Toast – "Taking Accountability on the Road"

Episode Date: January 14, 2026
Hosts: Jackie and Claudia Oshry
Podcast: The Toast (Dear Media)

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Episode Overview

This episode is a lively, freewheeling midweek catchup between Jackie and Claudia as they share anecdotes about their week, riff on the sometimes chaotic logistics of driving and parking in Florida, reminisce about internet trends and their personal glow-up journeys, and discuss the latest pop culture stories. As ever, the sisters mix heartfelt reflections with their signature humor, frequently making the news about themselves, and introducing a new running joke about "Eternity Merch." Amid irreverent takes, the episode’s theme centers around taking responsibility and accountability—on the road, in friendships, and in life.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Koji’s Corner & The Hat Era (00:24–02:12)

• Claudia introduces a new playful segment, "Koji’s Corner."
• Fashion chat kicks off with Claudia wearing a Toast merch baseball cap, leading to stories of their past "hat era."
• Ongoing joke about their merch deliveries taking so long they should rebrand as "Eternity Merch":
  • Quote: "We absolutely need to change our merch to be called Eternity Merch. Like, it’s kind of a beautiful name." (01:31, Claudia)

2. Recapping TV Nights & Tell Me Lies (02:20–04:07)

• Jackie stayed up to watch Tell Me Lies, Claudia did not.
• Tangent about the show's possible longevity:
  • Jackie: “I don’t think it’s a show that can go on forever without it getting stupid with all the different twists and turns...” (03:36)
• IRL relationships between cast members blurring art and life.
  • Claudia: “Art imitates life and life imitates art.” (04:03)

3. Hunter Hayes Nostalgia & TikTok Throwbacks (04:28–05:48)

• Claudia broke into a passionate, word-perfect rendition of Hunter Hayes’ I Want Crazy after hearing it on TikTok, musing how certain songs are instant portals to another era.
  • Quote: “Don’t be near me or my shoulders when that song comes on.” (05:28, Claudia)
• Both reflect on the intensity of music nostalgia and its ability to transport.

4. 2016 Photo Trend & Revisiting Old Eras (06:09–09:03)

• Claudia talks about the viral "ugly 2016 photos" trend on Instagram.
• Jackie and Claudia reflect on nostalgic pics, past fashion decisions (especially Claudia’s infamous eyeliner), and how partners and sisters are sometimes “blind to the cringe.”
  • Quote: “[My husband] was with me during that time, and he loved me, like, so much then. It’s insane how dumb and blind he is." (07:37, Claudia)
• Both reminisce about their “party eras,” maturing from clubbing to more 'sophisticated' socializing.

5. Driving Dramas & Taking Accountability on the Road (10:01–15:47)

• Both recount anxiety-inducing driving experiences in Florida: lane changes, near-misses, parking mishaps, and the hazards of switching from New York-style passenger culture to Florida driving.
  • Claudia: “If I ever get in a car crash, it will be from changing lanes.” (12:32)
• Jackie notes the humility of realizing you’re in the wrong and important to “take accountability on the road.” (13:14)
• Discuss the differences in accountability when driving yourself (Florida) versus being a passenger in NYC ("Not my problem!").
  • Quote: “In New York, you can just get out. I always do. I’ve been rear-ended, I’ve been pulled over, and I’m like, ‘You’re on your own, I have a podcast to record.’” (15:14, Claudia)

6. Parking Lot Petty Politics (16:27–18:28)

• A lighthearted mini-saga around stolen parking spots, untouchable reserved spaces, and the politics of who "deserves" priority in a shared lot.
• Recurring joke about needing a "podcaster reserved" parking spot.

7. Body Image, Outfits & The Importance of Details (19:05–19:43)

• Claudia pays Jackie a compliment on her appearance, both discuss how body image struggles can lead to "amping up" other self-care routines (hair, nails, etc.).
• Jackie: “You can’t get lost in the details. Focus on big picture: shop Eternity.”

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Pop Culture & Fast Five Stories

8. Jessica Simpson & Chicken of the Sea Collab (30:06–34:02)

• Claudia and Jackie debate whether Jessica’s collab is “too little, too late,” recalling the original reality TV mixup.
  • Quote: “When she was on her newlyweds show, she was like, ‘Well, is it chicken or tuna?’... It’s a bad name. That’s like having a brand of chips called ‘Cookies of Earth’. Like, well, it’s a chip.” (30:30, Claudia)
• Discussion meanders into which tuna brands are superior, sparking laughter over product loyalty.

9. Toast "Toasty Lion" Awards & Brand Partnerships (33:05–35:20)

• Running segment where they rank brand collaborations on “Toasty Lion” (Cannes Lions for Toast). They decide the Simpson/Chicken of the Sea collab is too obvious to make the cut.

10. Kylie (Kelsey) on Donna Kelsey & The Traitors (36:40–40:45)

• Kylie Kelsey discusses how her mother-in-law Donna Kelsey kept reality show secrets. Jackie & Claudia speculate on whether Taylor Swift watches The Traitors out of support.
  • Quote: “She never said ‘I’m not a traitor,’ and that was her nail in the coffin… but anyone can lie, it’s how you can deflect.” (40:32, Jackie)

11. Chris Noth and SJP Drama (42:43–45:46)

• Chris Noth (Mr. Big, SATC) made a cryptic Instagram dig at Sarah Jessica Parker, sparking further speculation about Sex and the City cast feuds.
  • Jackie: "He would never work again if he was a woman who looked like that and was like that crazy, but he's more booked than ever." (53:38)

12. Jennifer Lawrence Calls Herself a "Stay at Home Mom" (48:55–50:49)

• JLaw said on Smartless she identifies as a stay-at-home mom outside of her annual 3-month shoot schedule.
  • Jackie: “I don’t find this offensive… She’s not a celebrity who actively works a lot.” (50:17)
• Hosts discuss the nuances of mom-life: “Time moves so slow when you’re just sitting around the house.” (50:25, Claudia)

13. Nikki Glaser’s “Cut” Golden Globes Sydney Sweeney Joke (51:04–53:13)

• They read Glaser’s joke (cut from the Golden Globes): “There was a movie this year where Sydney Sweeney played a lesbian who bounced around in T shorts for two hours and it made $14.” (51:46, Nikki Glaser)
• They dissect why it was cut (Sydney’s absence, potentially hurtful to her), and muse about Sydney’s bombed passion project and how public perception shifts.
  • Quote: “A man could never say it… Jail! Like, literally prison.” (52:09, Claudia)

14. Mark Ruffalo in Hollywood (53:13–54:50)

• Vent about Ruffalo’s omnipresence at awards shows despite what they see as declining looks and increasingly out-there political takes.

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Memorable Quotes & Moments

• On “taking accountability…on the road”:
  “It’s very important when driving, like, to not always be on the offensive—to know when you’re wrong. Like, I was wrong… and [the other driver] was like, ‘it’s okay.’ So you know, I was making friends and just sort of taking accountability, which is really important.” (13:14, Claudia)

• On nostalgia’s tricks:
  “Nostalgia is a mind’s trick. If I’d been there, I’d hate it.” (09:21, Claudia)

• On being an empath, but also a realist:
  “I am an empath, of course, but I’m a realist first. If I stay here and support this man in his journey, I will be late for work 1,000%.” (15:51, Claudia)

• On acting:
  “Acting is really not that hard. There’s no way.” (54:22, Claudia)

• On the endlessness of certain pop culture conversations:
  “Everything was two to three years ago. Or two to three weeks. Or two to three months.” (20:12, Jackie)

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Notable Timestamps

• 00:24 – Start of the show, Koji’s Corner and merch banter
• 02:20 – TV talk: Tell Me Lies and Hunter Hayes
• 06:09 – 2016 Instagram photo trend discussion
• 10:01 – First driving story and accountability theme
• 13:14 – Claudia describes a near miss and the importance of accountability
• 19:05 – Compliments, body image and self-care compensations
• 30:06 – Jessica Simpson/Chicken of the Sea story
• 33:05 – Toasty Lions segment
• 36:40 – Donna Kelsey and The Traitors gossip
• 40:32 – On deflection vs lying: traitor talk
• 42:43 – Chris Noth/SJP story
• 48:55 – Jennifer Lawrence as a “stay at home mom”
• 51:04 – Nikki Glaser’s Sydney Sweeney cut joke
• 53:13 – Mark Ruffalo “old men in Hollywood” rant

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Final Thoughts

True to form, this Toast episode is a spirited, self-aware, and at times delightfully unhinged catchall of current obsessions, (mis)adventures, and random gripes. Beneath the goofiness is an undercurrent of self-reflection and the comfort and chaos of sisterhood. If you love pop culture with a hefty dose of self-deprecating wit and don't mind tumbling off-topic, this episode is a prime example of Jackie and Claudia’s comedic chemistry and the unique flavor that keeps Toast listeners tuning in.

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Listen if you want:

• Relatable driving stories and parking trauma
• The real talk behind Instagram trends and body image
• Hot takes on brand partnerships and award shows
• Sisterly banter at its finest

(Intros, ads, and outros have been skipped.)

Transcript

[A]

Good morning, girlies.

[B]

It's the Toast. It's Jackson Claude, and we're your host.

[A]

It's your favorite show.

[B]

The best five things you need to know.

[A]

We'll start your day off swirly. It's the Toast.

[B]

They sound amazing.

[A]

Welcome back to the toast and happy hump day. Don't forget to hump someone you love and speak of somebody that I love and as you guys know, would do anything to hump. It's Jackie O. Jacqueline Follet. Jacqueline, how you doing?

[B]

I'm doing well, thank you. Happy to be a guest on Koji's Corner today. Yes.

[A]

Thank you all for tuning in to this new segment we are calling Koji's Corner, where Koji sits in a corner and tells you how she feels.

[B]

Sounds amazing.

[A]

And she cuects community members in Coogee's Corner.

[B]

I'm wearing a hat on the show today. A little baseball cap, a little toasty merch. Even though our merch takes an eternity.

[A]

To come, you'll look like that.

[B]

So the hats are top, top quality fabric. And it's just. I feel like it's a different vibe. Like, who knows what's gonna happen?

[A]

Do you remember our hat era? Sometimes, like, clips will come across my desk of, like, when you and I wore hats a couple of times, like, for a week.

[B]

What?

[A]

Yeah, we had a hat era.

[B]

I can, like, remember. I can count on my hands the times I've worn a hat on this show. And it's so few because it's not like I did it and never wanted to do it again the next day. So I wonder how this one's gonna go. I just felt like my outfit needed a little more personality. Plus, it was, like, rainy this morning, so I was like, let me throw a baseball cap on. Out the way, out the door.

[A]

No.

[B]

You look so cute, you merch.

[A]

By the way, we absolutely need to, like, change our merch to be called Eternity Merch. Like, it's kind of a beautiful name. And, like, we let people know off the bat, like, our merch will take an eternity to come. It's a beautiful name. I know. And we can have a logo with, like, the eternity symbol. Infinity symbol. Isn't that nice?

[B]

That's really beautiful. Eternity merch dot com.

[A]

Like, where's your shirt from? Eternity. Eternity apparel.

[B]

Eternity and maternity.

[A]

Oh, is that the maternity for eternity?

[B]

That'll be a capsule collection.

[C]

Bye.

[B]

Eternity.

[A]

Oh, well, that's like, my line specifically. Yeah. The possibilities are endless when you embrace the eternity.

[B]

Well, the possibilities are eternal.

[A]

That's also true.

[B]

Here at Eternity.

[A]

Thank you all for tuning.

[B]

Yeah, thank you all for tuning. How are you tuning today?

[A]

I'm doing amazing because I didn't stay up late watching Tell Me Lies. But you did. I didn't know, like, we were committed to doing a recap.

[B]

We? You were at my house yesterday before you left. I was like, what's on tonight? And you were like, tell me Lies. Two episodes. So I killed myself to watch one and a quarter episodes of Tell Me Lies. And I was, like, so mad, but I had to go to sleep. And I was like, well, she's gonna spoil it for me on the show tomorrow because she watched two. Turns out she watched none.

[A]

Yeah, I was just, like, sort of taking it easy last night. You know, we had dinner together, I moseyed on home. What did I do? Oh, at FaceTime with my Machatunam sister because she, like, opened some boxes for me while I was in. In back in New York. So, yeah, I just sort of took it easy. Very self care, kind of happy food.

[B]

So I'll spoil it for you.

[A]

No, I have a question. How long do you think Tommy Lies goes?

[B]

Oh, how many seasons?

[A]

Well, is it the four years of college? Like.

[B]

Well, no, because, like, Steven's gonna graduate, so, like, what?

[A]

Oh, he's older.

[B]

Yeah, He's a senior. Thank God. Get rid of him.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But they're also eight years in the future with the wedding, so they can do a lot with it. And I imagine it's like, if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Like, we have a hit show on our hands. Why would we end it? But I do think that at some point they should end it with dignity. Right. Maybe at, like, season four. So if this is three, like, maybe we have one more season. I just made that up.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But I don't think it's a show that, like, can go on forever without it getting stupid with, like, all the different twists and turns that usually lead us to this wedding.

[A]

Yeah. It's also really crazy that the two of them are still dating. Irl. Yeah, it's kind of amazing, but it's so crazy. And it's definitely not a PR relationship. It's just extremely convenient for the network.

[B]

But I also imagine, like, when you're. And this happens all the time, like when you're on these sets of these shows that are, like, hot and heavy, like, you can't help but fall in love. Art imitates life, and life imitates art.

[A]

It's beautiful. Sort of the message for the first episode Of Koji's corner.

[B]

Oh, really? What about your art is imitating your life and vice versa? Well, our art is our life, but.

[A]

When you live your art, you don't need to answer questions like that. You know, you live your truth and in an authentic and in a Cojourner truth kind of way.

[B]

And the authenticity is internal. I know.

[A]

It's like the authenticity is eternal.

[B]

It sounds like you listened to Hunter Hayes in the car on the way here.

[A]

I didn't.

[B]

But you were just singing that.

[A]

I made a tick tock to Hunter Hayes this morning.

[B]

Oh, is he going viral?

[A]

No. I wish. Like, if the world was a good place, Hunter Hayes would be going viral. He's such a p job.

[B]

The world is disgusting.

[A]

No, I don't want good and I don't want good enough I want can't sleep, can't breathe without your love from porch and one more kiss it doesn't make sense to anybody else who cares if you're all I think about? I've searched the world and I know now it ain't right if you ain't lost your mind I don't want easy I want crazy. You with me, baby?

[B]

Let's be crazy.

[A]

Yeah, he takes it up a notch there.

[B]

He has a really crazy register. Right.

[A]

I heard that song on TikTok this morning. Someone was like, give me Hunter Hayes 2014 back. And it was like, shocking to me how I literally haven't heard that song in maybe 10 years. And I knew every single word.

[B]

It goes so hard. It has no business going so hard.

[A]

Don't be near me or my shoulders when that song comes on. No one's a monkey.

[B]

I listen to it in the car on the way home.

[A]

Yeah, Hunter is actually slays in a lot of ways.

[B]

No, he has a beautiful voice and he makes amazing music and he has, like, new music, and it's still amazing.

[A]

He wrote a song called dear God. Do you know that one?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Cry. Yeah, cry tears.

[B]

I want to ask you something about something that's happening on the Internet.

[A]

Oh, sure.

[B]

No, not like anything personal.

[A]

I want to ask you something. What do you think about in women's sports?

[B]

What do you think about it?

[A]

I think that I really value my career as always, and that's just what I want to lead with, always. I'm literally the Jimmy Fallon of the podcasting industry. What you need me to say? I will say it. I don't stand for anything.

[B]

Okay. We love that for you. No, I was going to ask you about this trend that I'm seeing. On the Internet, and I want to know where it hails from.

[A]

2016.

[B]

2016.

[A]

I have no idea. I saw Tinks posting, like, a collage of her.

[B]

I saw Danielle Carolan.

[A]

Okay. So I thought, like, Tinks was just doing something, like, on her own. I'm like, oh, that's like, a cute thing. But apparently it's a part of a baby trend. And I saw my sister do it. Posting ugly pictures of me from 2016. One thing about me, I just. I. I need to participate in all trends. And I did check my Instagram. I posted, like, really cute video. Did you say you're in it?

[B]

No show. Wait, I mean, do you post it to feeder Stories? I haven't had a chance this morning. Feed.

[A]

I posted to feed. You didn't say.

[B]

No, I haven't had a chance to be on my phone. Oh, my gosh. There you are. First one. Butterflies love. I heard it's 2016.

[A]

Yeah. I'm getting involved.

[B]

Okay, but, like, where did you hear that? And why?

[A]

Oh, my God. They can't be so literal. I don't know. It's a trend.

[B]

Oh, there's me.

[A]

Okay, if you listen to that, I.

[B]

Want to enjoy watching. Yeah, later.

[A]

Unfortunately for me, like, 2016 was the ugliest I have ever been, and if I have anything to do with it, the ugliest I will ever be. So I was very limited in my pool of content because, like I said, I was moly and fat and ugly and just like, oh, my God, girl, try like. And I was obsessed with eyeliner when we did the breath and, like, the first year of the toe. Yeah, the first year of the toast. I wore every day. The thickest, most uneven, poorly applied black eyeliner on and, like, with a wing, a poorly constructed one. Nobody said anything to me. And of course, like, if you did, I would have just, like, thought you were a hater who was jealous of me and my beauty. But it's insane that I left the house that day. And that's how I know, actually, that Ben really loves me. Like, he was with me during that time, and he loved me, like, so much then. It's insane how dumb and, like, blind he is.

[B]

That's really funny. I do remember the winged eyeliner.

[A]

And what did you think about it at the time?

[B]

Like, were you talking about it behind my back? I didn't think about it. I thought my sister was slaying.

[A]

Per usual, you and Ben, like two blind idiots. That's really sweet.

[B]

Maybe I'll go look at, like, 2016. That was a good year. That was a fun year. And it was like, fun to see like snitches, carousel and like, for once I'm in everything.

[A]

Yeah, right.

[B]

You know, these days.

[A]

No, no, she's traveling.

[B]

No campers.

[A]

No.

[B]

But like, we used to hang out so much, all of us. We still do. I mean, look at us. Yeah, but we used to hang out so much. We used to party so much. There was so much good stuff.

[A]

We used to party so much and party so hard.

[B]

When I was watching Tell me Lies last night, I was like getting a pic because like this isn't a spoiler or anything, but they do Molly. And then the next day they're like coming down and like anxiety and not like just that whole like phase of like drinking anxiety. Like.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh my God. I was literally having anxiety just watching it.

[A]

Whenever I watch people on TV do drugs, even if it goes well, it's not like a bad drug story. I get the worst pit in my stomach because I'm either waiting for something to go wrong. I don't know, like, drugs give me the worst anxiety always. So I feel that.

[B]

Yeah, it was like, that's what I like about the show. It really transports you. And like, you. I just have like anxiety the whole time I'm watching it. And they also really capture like the era. I'm the era. So it's so great and immersive, I would say. But like, oh my God, I don't miss those. Like I had. It was fun while it lasted.

[A]

But like we're looking at it. The rose colored glasses. Nostalgia is a mind's trick. If I'd been there. I hate it.

[B]

Yeah. But like all the partying. Yeah, I'm good without really watch. Tell me lies.

[A]

No, I know. Well, that type of partying, like I've had many party eras and I would think like, you know, my more sophisticated party era was one of my favorites, you know.

[B]

What's your more sophisticated party era?

[A]

Not like club rat, dirty eyeliner, vibes. Like, I don't know, I just feel like I had a sophisticated era when I was like going to better parties with better people. You know what I mean?

[B]

Sophisticated parties. Yeah.

[A]

And like, like lots of wealthy people. That was fun.

[B]

But what about like the drinking? Lots of drinking, of course. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. So you're wearing a hat.

[B]

So I'm wearing a hat.

[A]

And did Zach bringing that hat and said he thinks you should wear this hat to the party tonight.

[B]

Yeah, it's an option for a hat I could wear to the party tonight. I have Others. So we'll see. I have some other options from Eternity Merch.

[A]

That's amazing. I love their stuff.

[B]

Are you okay?

[A]

Yeah. Are you who I like?

[B]

I was being silly.

[A]

Is that what we do for a living?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Are you okay?

[B]

Yeah, I'm great.

[A]

Do you want to get deep? Open up?

[B]

Let's think. Let's think. I don't really have anything, like, new to share. Okay. You know, just like plugging along.

[A]

You don't want to tell everyone that big thing you're going through.

[B]

Oh, my God, you're so crazy. No, I mean, I am going through a big thing. I just had a baby. Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

Which is a huge thing.

[B]

Major. So. Yeah. Just doing that.

[A]

Yeah. And how's that?

[B]

It's good. It's great. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah, it is.

[B]

How about you?

[A]

Spent the whole day with you yesterday.

[B]

We did spend the whole day together. Yeah.

[A]

What it was was that I was in the car and in order to, like, get to my next destination, I had to make a U turn on this big ass Florida street. And I was like, changing lanes and actually like was within inches from my life. And I decided that the U turn was not for me. And then the street, the street I saw next. I do know that that street led to your house because I see it all the time when I drive to your house. And I said, everyone, buckle up, we're going to Jackie's. That's how I ended up at your house.

[B]

That's how you ended up at my house.

[A]

Yeah. Changing lanes is such drama.

[B]

Changing lanes is not for me. You know, I plan my turns two turns in advance, so I never wind up in the wrong lane. And as I become a more seasoned driver with every day, you know, sometimes I do see the opportunity to change a little.

[A]

Correct. But just to like, get to your destination faster. Like, just be a little bit more comfortable in the lanes.

[B]

Yeah. Like, not with someone in front of me and behind me. Yeah. The one next to me is wide open, of course. Just like, why aren't you guys going into it?

[A]

What's wrong with this lane?

[B]

I am constantly, like, gaming. I don't know if everybody. Everybody changes. Yeah. The whole time.

[A]

And I was really taught to drive by Ben Safer, who is obsessed with changing lanes. Like, be like Pac Man.

[B]

Yeah. Goes between every car, like, just to keep going ahead.

[A]

Frogger.

[B]

And the funniest is when you see someone change lanes from behind you because they're trying to get there faster than, like, you both end up at the red light together. And it's like, what did that get you right?

[A]

You almost killed your whole family. For what?

[B]

For what? We're still sitting at the same light.

[A]

So both yesterday and actually on my way again this morning, I had like, a near fatal lanes change. Like, to me, if I ever get in a car crash, it will be from changing lanes.

[B]

Yeah. Do you have a good camera on your car that show, like, when you have your signal on to change lanes, it like, shows you.

[A]

Tesla has that. Mine has, like, no, I have my rear view mirror. And then on the mirror there's a little orange triangle. So it's like, don't go. But I do feel like the triangle is like a little sensitive. Like, bitch, I could fit. So a lot of times I will effectively. I will effectively change lanes even though the triangle. Triangle was flashing. But then sometimes, like the triangle, I was like, oh, yeah, you were onto something there. Triangle. My bad, my bad. And so this morning, this guy was like, I literally almost killed him. He was so mad at me. And I. It's very important when driving, like, to not always be on the offensive, like, to know when you're wrong. Like, I was wrong. And I was like. And he was like, it's okay. So, you know, I was making friends on the road as well and just sort of taking accountability, which is really important. It's so good to take accountability on.

[B]

The road when you're driving. I take a lot of accountability. I've been, like, digging up my car.

[A]

Just digging it up, Just digging it up.

[B]

Like, we have to park a lot.

[A]

Lot. We do.

[B]

Commuting requires a lot of parking. Last week I didn't update you guys because it was a Friday episode, but after I. I parked on the street and paid the meter, I like, forgot that where I parked, like, there was a curb in front of me. So, like, when I left, you just started driving straight.

[A]

And did you mark up your vehicle? I didn't see anything, but I saw.

[B]

A lady on the sidewalk and she.

[A]

Looked at me and I was like.

[B]

Yeah, the whole car. Like.

[A]

You know what you realize when you drive a lot? When you drive a lot and, like, start doing it up, you realize, like, your car can take a lot. You know, like something that you think would leave a mark. But you have a white car. My car's black.

[B]

Like, next car, I'm getting black. Yeah.

[A]

What goes on in my vehicle.

[B]

That's a really good point.

[A]

Is genuinely none of my business.

[B]

And yesterday I parked in a regular parking spot, but I guess I went, like, too close to the. What's it called at the front of the parking spot. The concrete slab.

[A]

The curb. No, no. Oh. Like the.

[B]

The parking lot.

[A]

The bumper.

[B]

The line that you pull up to that is like a concrete block. I parked, like, I guess on top of it. So when I pulled out, there was another bump, there was another jump. The car was jumping.

[A]

You were jumping and thumping and bumping and wilding out.

[B]

Yeah. So lessons learned. Taking accountability for that. My b. Yeah.

[A]

It's just like, this is, again, another thing where, like, for me, in my personal journey, New York has Florida beat. Like, it's seriously the cab driver's problem. If I'm in a vehicle and, like, what happens next? I have actually been in motor vehicle collisions, like, in a taxi or an Uber.

[B]

It's not your problem.

[A]

I literally get out. Like, I'm sorry that. That happens, sir, but I have places to be. Same. Like, I've actually been in a taxi that's been pulled over, and I'm not responsible. In New York City, like, you can just get out. And I often do. I always have. I've been rear ended, I've been pulled over, and I'm like, you're on your own. I said, we all kind of run our own race.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And, sir, I wish you the best, but I have a podcast to record.

[B]

I guess it, like, it would be in the moment. It feels weird to leave because it's like, what if he needs help? Like, what if I need to give a statement? But in. In thinking about these things, it's like, why would you stick around? Like, why? You don't know this person.

[A]

Right.

[B]

You don't, like, leave? Why are you hanging out in a random car? Yeah.

[A]

And it's like, I am an empath, of course, but I'm a realist first. And I know, like, if I stay here and support this man in his journey, like, I will be late for work 1,000%.

[B]

And, like, is the meter still running?

[A]

Okay, so let me think. In the times that I have when I got rear ended in the Uber, Uber's easy. Like, I just said, end the trip, and I had. I paid, whatever. But in the yellow cab, when he got pulled over, I think I paid.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Of course he's about to get a big fat ticket. Like, it's at least I can do.

[B]

But he has to end the meter.

[A]

Yeah. Which he was able to do.

[B]

Meter equal to ended.

[A]

Yeah. I think also, if you're like a New York City traffic cop, you know, like, part of pulling over a cab is, like, the paperwork comes first.

[B]

Yeah. Speaking of, I meant to Ask the gang about where I parked. It said, like, I just want to make sure. Like, it said, all others will be towed, you know?

[A]

Oh, I know. Wait.

[B]

But I do think, no, it's not.

[A]

Park there.

[B]

No. Okay. I parked back there, but. And there's a couple spots that are safe for a particular tenant. I one time parked there, and I got a nasty sticker on my car.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

So then there's others that are like, but it's part of the plaza. And I said, but I'm in the plaza. I'm a customer of the plaza.

[A]

So I'm so glad you brought that up, because if you guys saw me texting on my phone right here before I am parked in the other tenant. Yeah. And I just got a text about it, so that's why I just asked her to go out and, like, maybe move my car. Oh, there's, like. If you saw me on my phone, like, there's a vehicle drama.

[B]

I experienced that in June. I parked in the other tenant, and they take their parking really seriously.

[A]

And now that we're, like, doing sort of like a residency at this studio, like, how do we go about getting a sign?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Parking says, saved for, like, the most famous podcasters on the planet.

[B]

And that would apply to anyone who uses this studio.

[A]

No, it wouldn't.

[B]

But we get it at this hour, correct?

[A]

Just something to talk to the city council about, you know?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

The next meeting.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I know you like to be, like.

[B]

An informed community member. I am.

[A]

Yeah. Am I something to think about?

[B]

Well, let's get into the story, shall we? As long as your car is not getting towed.

[A]

Yeah. Well, actually, what's great is that Ben was just dropping off a T shirt for me.

[B]

Right.

[A]

And so he's working on that. Can you handle the car thing? Are we good? Do we have to move the car? We had to move the car. Okay. I just feel like that person who gets that special vehicle, while I understand that they're an important person, the person who gets the.

[B]

The.

[A]

The special spot.

[B]

Are they an important person? I don't feel like they are.

[A]

Well, I know that they're a business owner in this complex, and, like, so I just feel like they could have off and, like, for once, tried to, you know, join the rest of us in struggling to find a parking spot.

[B]

It's for their customers, and I just feel like they don't have enough to justify the two spots, you know, it's for them.

[A]

It's for the business owner.

[B]

Confirmed. Business owner?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

What's the business owner? Well, the owner of that. Oh. Oh, they. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, I thought it was for their customers.

[A]

No, no.

[B]

I'm like, well, it's.

[A]

I'll buy a watch.

[B]

Like, it's always open, so.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

What does that say?

[A]

Now we do have stories to get into. Even though I don't feel. I feel like it's one of those days where the stories are just, like, kind of an inconvenient truth.

[B]

I agree. And who knows where they'll lead? So, as always, like, we will do the stories, of course, but if we don't harp on them, don't be upset. There's not, like, a lot to harp on.

[A]

I just feel like it's going to be one of those days where I have no choice but to make every story about myself, which is different from other days, of course.

[B]

Yeah, we'll see. We'll see where we can go with it.

[A]

But you're just looking so, like, you know. No, like, your little hands. Like, your nails look so long and nice. I'm kind of jealous. And you've got, like, jewels and you're.

[B]

Just looking cute, you know, like, when I'm just. Thank you for noticing. I'm trying to enhance other areas. Like, of course, of course, of course.

[A]

Like, no, when you're not transition, when you're not loving, when you're. When you're not living in your dream body. Like, other things do need to just, like, be amped up. Like, I always wear more makeup when I'm, like, feeling insecure about my weight. I always do my hair, like, better than ever. I wear more jewelry. I'm on top of my nails. I'm always, like, waxing my eyebrows as if, like, it's gonna take £10 off, you know? And then I do weigh myself after because, like, the. The weight of the hair, of course.

[B]

And it's very heavy.

[A]

Yeah, of course.

[B]

Heavy is the head. So thank you for noticing the little details.

[A]

It's been a pleasure and an honor.

[B]

Detailed.

[A]

You are a detailed person, I would say.

[B]

I would say. But you can't get lost in the details is what I would also say. Focus on big picture shop eternity shop. Eternitymerch.com.

[A]

Yeah, it's actually shoptoes merch.com and it will take an eternity, but it's the best things you ever wore. Like, for real.

[B]

Like.

[A]

Like, seriously, things you'll give to your grandchildren.

[B]

Like, this hat is from, like, three years ago. Looks brand new.

[A]

It's from, like, a year ago, but.

[B]

Yeah, I'm like you now. Everything was three Years ago.

[A]

Isn't it amazing to live, like, without that time, space, continuum?

[B]

Everything was two to three years ago.

[A]

Two to three weeks. Or two to three years. Or two to three months.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Not sure.

[B]

Without further ado to do, here are the fast five stories that you do need to know. In no particular order. In no particular order. Let's.

[A]

I don't know, it feels like the order is a little particular since you're moving things around.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You didn't choose that crazy headline, did you?

[B]

I don't know what I chose.

[A]

No. The one that you showed me before the show.

[B]

No.

[A]

You read it to everyone.

[B]

Oh, my gosh, yes.

[A]

Was like strolling the Daily Mail and she was like this headline just like, kept getting crazier.

[B]

This is a worst nightmare headline.

[A]

And just when you think the headline is over and it couldn't possibly get worse, it does.

[B]

Harrowing moment. 550 pound Internet star is lifted into police van by six in caps. Cops. Because she was too big to fit an SUV during arrest.

[A]

Why are you laughing?

[B]

Before she vanished.

[A]

You are. Before she vanished.

[B]

What?

[A]

I just want to say, laughing at a time like this, you are never beating the fat phobic allegations.

[B]

No, but, like, just the story gets crazier and crazier and, like, was she found? I don't know because it's a Daily Mail exclusive and I don't subscribe, so we'll never know what happened. Not them.

[A]

Putting important news behind a paywall.

[B]

Yeah. And like, they just keep, like, bringing up her weight. It's just a nightmare scenario.

[A]

I know. And that always was something that gave me peace as an overweight person was that I was definitely harder to kidnap. And now that I'm on setbound, like, I'm constantly worried about my safety.

[B]

I don't even understand. I don't understand the headline.

[A]

Well, then it's not a story.

[B]

Like, why was she being lifted? Why was she in police custody?

[A]

She is a modern day what's eating Gilbert Grape. Not enough people talk about that movie. One of Johnny Depp's earliest works. Him and Leonardo DiCaprio are both in it. They're both like 16 and they play this like, really poor family who live in the middle of nowhere and their mother is like, morbidly obese. She, like, can't even. She can't leave her bed. And Leonardo DiCaprio is autistic. Right in the film. And Johnny Depp's just like, trying to keep this family together. Trying to go to school, trying to fall in love, trying to do this and eventually, spoiler alert. The mother passes away, like, in her sleep. And they don't want to call, like, an ambulance because they wouldn't be able to get her out of the house. They'd have to forklift her out. It would be too much shame for the family. So they end up, like, burning the house down with her in Was. So why, like, we were watching that movie? Like, I saw that movie. I was, like, 11.

[B]

I know, but, like, that was, like, the movie of that year. Like, imagine if they came out now.

[A]

Like, and by the way, that movie was like, whatever that. What's the opposite of woke? Like, that movie was insane. Like, he wouldn't bring girls home because he was so embarrassed of his mom. It was like. It was really.

[B]

I remember the point of the movie. What was eating Gilbert, you know?

[A]

Yeah. I don't know.

[B]

Well, let's get into the actual stories. Not the knots story.

[A]

If you just. If you want to be upset, you should watch that movie.

[B]

Our first story. I actually would like, like to watch that movie now as an adult, like, see what it was about.

[A]

Yeah. What all the fuss was about.

[B]

Because, like, we just remember, like, the very, like, dark parts. No. And, like, memorable parts.

[A]

And did anybody else see that movie or just us when we were 11?

[B]

No. I think that that was, like, the Oscar movie of the year. The same way Slumdog Millionaire.

[A]

Right.

[B]

The movie. Like, that was the movie.

[A]

Like, the fact that when everyone. When there were those jokes that, like, the Oscars. Leo had never had an Oscar, and he had, like, that movie was his Oscar movie. Like, he was the most profound performance.

[B]

But, you know, the Oscar is about a body of work, and that was, like, his first movie.

[A]

Who cares?

[B]

Just.

[A]

I'm just telling you, that kid from adolescence just won. And, like, that was his first work.

[B]

Yeah. They just make up.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And, like, you're not. You buying into it.

[B]

It's like letting you know what they would. How they would respond to that, you know? Today's episode of the Toast is brought to you by the Container Store. If you want to start the year off right, get to the Container Store. They can help you organize any space in your home and pretty much your life. My life and home were very disorganized in the last few months. Being postpartum, you know, just, like, so much stuff all around. Nursing stuff, baby stuff, etc. I ordered the pargies, bins, garbage cans, organization essentials from the Container Store, and now I can, like, see clearly again. If you don't know how to get started, the experts at The Container Store can help you find exactly what you need from high quality organizers for your fridge and pantry that make eating healthier a real possibility. Where everything like looks tasty to closet storage that helps you see actually what you have. They've got solutions this year. Find real solutions for all of your resolutions. The best selection and service at the Container Store. So you can clean out your closet, you can clean out your pantry, your fridge, any area of your home. You know, get a bin for it, get pargy hangers. They just have everything for making your home like feel like a well oiled machine. Visit containerstore.com and use code Toast at checkout for a discount on your purchase. That's containerstore.com use code T O A S-T for a special discount. I got some rotten bins, I got a huge garbage can that is actually nice looking from Container Store because I just have like water bottles and a million things that pile up in my room right now and I just throw it in the bin. But you can really get anything that you need a Container Store and it's a great way to start the year off in an organized manner. Might I suggest Today's episode of the Toast is also brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace is the all in one platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online. Whether you're just starting out or scaling your business, Squarespace gives you everything you need to claim your domain, showcase your offerings with a professional website, grow your brand and get paid all in one place. So it is a one stop shop for your website. If you want to launch a new business this year, do it with Squarespace. If you want to upgrade your current website for your business and just maximize all of your efforts, do it with Squarespace. You can get the domain that you want through Squarespace. They will help you format your website so it looks incredibly professional. Like you write code and you did not write code and you do not have to write code. It will help you grow your brand, process payments. Everything is all in one place. It is the one stop shop for online business owners and whatever kind of product you sell, what kind of business you win. You can have a website through Squarespace that will be great for your customers. They will love using it and will be great for you on the back end doing the admin feeling like you write code when you do not have to write code. So go to squarespace.com toast to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain using code toast again that is squarespace.com toast to save 10% off your first purchase of a web website or domain at Squarespace. They have great services for your website. They have cutting edge design SEO tools for marketing. They'll help you get the domain that you want so you can have a party website like eternitymerch.com and it's really fabulous. Today's episode of the Toast is also brought to you by Legacy Box. We love Legacy Box here at the Toast. We were just talking about 2016 MEMS and legacy box is the perfect brand to sponsor this episode because it is how you can digitize your memories. So Legacy Box is like an idea that you wish that you had because it makes so much sense. We have all of these photos, like physical photos from growing up videos on videotapes. And, you know, we don't have a VCR player anymore, so how do we watch those things? We send it to Legacy Box. So you. They send you an empty box. You send all of these archival things that you have, whether it's tapes, photos, and they will digitize everything all in one place so that you have it forever and you can share it with anybody else who you want to share it with. And everything is preserved. Legacy Box began when the founders realized that most people couldn't even set the time on their VCRs, let alone figure out how to rescue their family's home movies. They bootstrapped Legacy Box from nothing and built the world's largest, most trusted digitizing company so that families wouldn't lose the moments that made them who they are. That is so us. We love our home movies, and we've preserved them with Legacy Box. And watching them back is one of the best things ever. And seeing how we're all exactly the same is the funniest thing ever. So visit legacybox.com toast for 55 off. That's legacybox.com toast to save 55%. When you digitize your memories, it is something that all of us should do, especially as millennials. Like, we've all got those analog things, you know, in a closet in our house, and it's time to send them to Legacy Box. Today's episode of the Toast is also brought to you by AG1. AG1 is the name on everybody's lips because it is sustainable health that is about consistency, not perfection. And you can simplify your nutrition with AG1, which is a multivitamin, pre and probiotic, superfood and antioxidants all in one scoop. So that One scoop of AG1 literally has so much in it, and it's everything that you need for a par g you and a better you with all of the health benefits that you could want in one scoop. So AG1 is the opposite of complexity. It's 20 seconds, one scoop, eight ounces of water. Done. You drink it first thing in the morning before coffee, before checking your phone. It will become a microhabit that anchors everything else. And they now have their next gen formula. They've added even more vitamins and minerals than ever clinically proven to fill common nutri nutrient gaps. So our entire family is on the AG1 grind. Whenever we're like on vacation or in a house together, it's like, who brought the Ag one? Where is it? Our husbands all love it so much and they are nutritionally benefiting. Whereas, you know, they might have some nutrient gaps in their diet. I wouldn't say like every day is packed with vitamins and minerals, but they take their AG1 and they're feeling great. AG1 has over 50,000 verified five star reviews and comes with a 90 day money back guarantee. Go to drink ag1.com toast to get their best offer. For a limited time only, get a free AG1 duffel bag and a free AG1 welcome kit with your first subscription. Order only while supplies last. That's drink ag1.com toast drink ag1.com toast. First up, let's get into the stories. Jessica Simpson announces a collaboration with Chicken of the sea 22 years after the iconic reality TV moment.

[A]

Have they not done this already? It feels redundant.

[B]

Like, it does feel redundant. It obviously feels late. And why. Yeah, why now? I feel like there were a couple times they could have done it obviously right after it happened, but also like after her memoir, like, like, yeah, there are just like a lot of big Jessica moments.

[A]

And not to be so dumb, but like, I don't eat tuna. Chicken of the Sea is a brand of tuna.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And when she was on her newlyweds show, she was like, well, is it chicken or tuna? Because it is, by the way. I never really. She's so done. Dumb blonde. It's a bad name. That's like having a brand of chips that's like cookies of earth. Like, well, it's a chip.

[B]

Yeah, I understand the confusion, but it is tuna. And if you're eating it, I think you would know it's tuna.

[A]

Okay, but also just devil's advocate here. What makes tuna the chicken of the sea?

[B]

It just like it being the most ubiquitous animal eaten.

[A]

I didn't even know that they were still around as a brand. That's quite a Feat.

[B]

I think your husband uses it.

[A]

Absolutely not. He. I literally know he does that. Wild. Yeah, Wild Earth salmon.

[B]

No, but when he does tuna. Oh, sorry.

[A]

Wild Earth albacore. You know that one. And, like, if he has to, he'll do Star Kiss. He does not mess around with chicken of the same.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

He's very specific.

[B]

He loves canned tuna. I've actually, like, recently bought canned tuna because he sometimes makes tuna at my house.

[A]

Well, he doesn't love canned tuna. He likes to make his own tuna, in which you need tuna in a can.

[B]

Yeah. So now I have that.

[A]

Yeah. Star Kids. And the other one, Starquist, is, like, available everywhere.

[B]

Everywhere. But then there's like, Wild Planet.

[A]

It's called.

[B]

Sorry. At the, like, you know, the fancy Whole Foods. Yeah, I get that one.

[A]

It's like yellow.

[B]

So she made this surprise announcement on Tuesday via her Instagram page. Shorter followers. New collab coming soon. I'll give you a hint. It's mermaid approved. She included several photos of her at a recent Chicken of the Sea event where she was wearing a sexy black dress.

[A]

She was wearing a black dress that I kind of need. You know, I feel like it's very. My physique. Yeah, she does. I love Jessica Simpson.

[B]

Yeah, me as well.

[A]

Important time to bring up. She is my birthday buddy, so I probably love her more than you. Okay.

[B]

Hey, I'll. I'll back down.

[A]

What's your favorite Jessica Simpson song?

[B]

Maybe with you.

[A]

I. I recently, like, re. Listened to a song of hers. It was, like, on a playlist that I was listening to a lot. Oh, I know it. I don't even need to look it up. Oh, I think I'm in love. Boy, I think that I'm in love.

[B]

With you and I've been doing silly.

[A]

Things when it comes to you. Oh, yeah.

[B]

So, yeah, love this. Toasty Lions. Maybe let's see how it ages. But, like, you're a little late.

[A]

I don't feel like it's Toasty Lions.

[B]

We haven't had a Toasty Lions in a while.

[A]

Really? I feel like we recently added one. What did we remember? I remember we actually added two to the list and we weren't sure if.

[B]

They see how they did, if they aged. Well, this would be a good day to like, sort of clean out the list.

[A]

It's such, by the way, Hashtag, clear the lists.

[B]

Oh, Koji. Okay, so I'm gonna start with the one. I'm gonna do the whole list. Okay. Toasty lines, by the way, are awards in branding of the Cannes Lions Awards. It's for the best in branding, like breast brand partnerships, collaborations and ideas.

[A]

Things that just make sense. What we like to call smarketing smart marketing.

[B]

So ones that are officially cemented on. Lindsay Hubbard for Kleinfeld's again.

[A]

Yep.

[B]

Which is where you resell wedding dresses.

[A]

That she never used.

[B]

Ryan Merriman, the actor from Smart House, doing an ad for Samsung. Smart House.

[A]

So cute.

[B]

Flip off. Doing ads on the toast.

[A]

Oh. Yep.

[B]

Alex Earl, Carl's Jr. Oh, I feel like.

[A]

Yeah, things that feel right, that.

[B]

Oh, that had the question mark next to it.

[A]

I. I haven't thought about it since then, but I do still think.

[B]

No, it counts.

[A]

It's good, but no, it's like amazing. Like she's a Carl's Jr girl. That used to mean something.

[B]

Okay, I'm gonna leave it with a question mark. We have to come back in like six months.

[A]

What was the last one?

[B]

Soon to call. No, there's a bunch. Kristen Cavallari's E Show podcast tour. I really did think that was like brilliant.

[A]

Did it ever come out?

[B]

Yeah, I watched it.

[A]

Get rid of it.

[B]

You were on maternity leave.

[A]

Get rid of it. I was watching everything. Get rid of it.

[B]

Wow. I hate actually delete. I would rather strike through, you know. Well, you should because to note that like.

[A]

Yeah, no, it's.

[B]

It was once you're racing history, strike.

[A]

Through or just like write delete.

[B]

I'll just write like no E Podcast. Delete.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Astronomer Gwyneth Paltrow.

[A]

That's there. Oh, did we talk about the astronomer woman? Like doing her tell all. Okay.

[B]

I think we did. Taylor Frankie Paul. That's the Bachelorette.

[A]

Yeah. Even though that's not like a marketing.

[B]

No, but it was like Hulu abc.

[A]

That would be like a feat in casting. And I would put that also with Hairspray, which I do know. We have a list of the like.

[B]

Things that are typically gas movies.

[A]

I think Taylor Frankie Paul would be on that list.

[B]

We also have to wait to see her season.

[A]

True, true.

[B]

And then. Oh, the girlfriend. Amazon show. XDR Toasters. Good Toasty Lion. I feel like the list is lacking. Everyone needs to step it up.

[A]

No, I just feel like it's one of those lists that's been so hyped up, you know, we can't even go back to it because we're only going to be disappointed.

[B]

Yeah. So, yeah, I guess this wouldn't be a Tosy line.

[A]

What was it again?

[B]

Taking up a C. Yeah, it's just.

[A]

Like low hanging fruit. This is like If I was, if I worked in marketing and this was my client and I was like an unoriginal person, this would be the idea that I had.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Are you ready for our next story?

[A]

Because I feel like it would be like cool and different if it was like Nick Lachey, you know, or like.

[B]

Those girls from the Toast.

[A]

Oh, of course. And let me just say I love chicken of the sea. Tuna every day.

[B]

Talked about Starkist and wild Earth and.

[A]

That'S probably what they wanted, you know.

[B]

So that we could then say we've had Sarkis, we've had wild earth.

[A]

What's the best tuna, Chicken of the sea. Bring back jingles. Okay. Why does nobody have a jingle?

[B]

Single handedly are bringing back jingles.

[A]

Of course. But I just mean if you want to like have a lasting impact, like you know who's holding the, the jingle industry together. Liberty. Liberty. Liberty. Liberty.

[B]

We write really great jingles.

[A]

I don't know who else has a jingle.

[B]

I think a lot of people do.

[A]

Goldfish used to have a great one snack that smiles back. Goldfish. I love jingles. That's like how if I'm walking through the store and I see it, I'll like seeing the jingle and then pick it up.

[B]

Yeah. Jingle all the way, huh?

[A]

Jingle on the way.

[B]

Our next story, Kylie Kyle C. Is talking about Donna Kelsey being on Traders.

[A]

Oh, what does she say?

[B]

And how she withheld inside scoop on readers from the family.

[A]

You know what's so funny? When I think of like the Kelsey's and like who, like I know that she's Taylor's sister in law and I always like I forget that Donna and Kelsey know each. Kylie know each other.

[B]

Yeah. And they're both like the female Kelsey's, you know. Yeah. In their name. But they're actually not related aside from through marriage.

[A]

Yeah. No, I forgot about them too. Together.

[B]

Yeah. So also like any excuse to talk about Traders. Donna Kelsey was tight lipped about her experience on Peacocks the Traders. Her daughter in law. Kylie tells people. She said she did not tell us much at all. Which I respect. I respect. You've got to keep the mystery live. She said.

[A]

I wonder, I mean if I was done I wouldn't be like shouting from the rooftops what I did on that show because it wasn't good. Like I would be tight lipped as well.

[B]

I wonder if she even told them that she was the traitor and the secret trader. Like I wonder if she told them that much.

[A]

Yeah. I'm also really curious.

[B]

They obviously knew something when she left.

[A]

And came home two days later. I. I was. You know what else I was thinking about? The contestants that, like, get sent home. When do they find out who the traitors were? Like, when they watch or, like.

[B]

Yeah, like, you know, maybe they have some inside scoop. And also they probably, like, talk to people in the cast. And when, like, they end the show, they probably talk, you know.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

When they all go home, they probably talk to them.

[A]

Yeah. But most of the people who get eliminated won't know who the traitors are. I guess, actually, towards the end, you might. Might start be being able to figure it out.

[B]

Right. Even if he gets sent home, Portia went home. Say whoever goes home, this in the new episode, say it's Ron or whatever, he goes home. And like, if he can message Portia, not that they're friends and be like, oh, by the way, Donna was the first trader. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Right, right. But I'm. But I mean, the remaining Traders.

[B]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[A]

You think Taylor's watching Traders?

[B]

I do, because Travis is watching.

[A]

Yeah. Do you think Taylor watches reality tv? I don't know why she does not strike me.

[B]

Didn't she say she watched Love Island? What did she say she watched Love is Blind.

[A]

Love is Blind. You're right. She did say that. Also at Coachella, remember she met Teresa Judice and it didn't. When you watched a video and she. And when Teresa told the story on her podcast, it didn't sound like there was any sort of, like, recognition.

[B]

Yeah. It just Teresa asked for a photo.

[A]

Like, if you watch any Bravo, you know Teresa, even if you don't watch Jersey Housewives Lives.

[B]

Yeah. I feel like she probably knew who she was. I'm sure she watches some Bravo over the years, but she's definitely watched Traders with Travis, like, to support Donner.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Who knows if she'll continue watching. If it was right off of the hook. I feel like. No.

[A]

Yeah. It wasn't off to, like, an amazing start.

[B]

Yeah. And they kind of like.

[A]

And they bullied her mother in law.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So even though, like, they were right because she was the traitor, I don't.

[B]

Think Travis is going to keep watching.

[A]

Yeah. I don't know. I feel like he's more likely to keep watching than her. Just in terms of, like, things that I think she would like and things that he would like, but I feel.

[B]

Like the cast wouldn't be for him. Like, I wouldn't. I don't.

[A]

They're not like, athletes. I'm surprised you don't have any, like, former athletes on There.

[B]

I'm sure they do other seasons, but. Yeah, I just feel like he wouldn't be that interested in the group that they have.

[A]

Yeah. Especially after they disrespected his mother.

[B]

But Donna did say that she and Jason, like, watch every season of Traders. He's just a traitor's fan. He's a fan of Jason, I think. So that's the vibe I got, that they, like, watch the show together because they love it.

[A]

Now. We didn't talk about how, actually when Donna said she was a traitor, she kind of slayed with her delivery.

[B]

You got yourself a traitor.

[A]

You got yourself a traitor. Honestly, that was the most energy, like, she gave the entire time. And first of all, I thought for sure she wasn't. So I was gonna be shocked no matter what, but I do really respect how she delivered that line. It's such an exciting thing to say, and you have one chance to say it. And I don't know if she practiced in the mirror or whatever, but it was really good. Wow. She's really good.

[B]

What I also liked about her is that she never, like, lied. Straight up. She never said, I'm not a traitor, and that kind of, you know, was her nail in the coffin. But, like, yeah, anyone can lie, but it's like, how you can deflect.

[A]

Yeah. And that's why I do believe I would be a great traitor, because I just lie. I have no, like, moral high ground. I have no issue lying, and I'm quite amazing at it. Although I do need to work on my whole looking up thing.

[B]

Yeah. So it's like, may the best liar win. Also the best actor or actress.

[A]

Correct. And you guys know, like, I was kind of meant to be an actress.

[B]

Yes, we do know.

[A]

Let's improv. Ready? We're at a coffee shop.

[B]

Oh, my God. You know, this is my least favorite game. Okay, fine. I'm at the bar.

[A]

You're the barista or barista.

[B]

What are you, like, a customer?

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Hi. Hi.

[A]

Oh, my God. You bitch. I mean, hi.

[B]

Hi. What can I get for you today?

[A]

Sorry, before we get started, what are your pronouns and scene? That was really good, Oscar.

[B]

Yeah, you should be the barista. Okay, why, like, asking me my pronoun?

[A]

Wait, I don't get it.

[B]

It's very barista.

[A]

Yeah, that's why I asked. Baristas are always, like. Like, have funky pronouns.

[B]

Oh, Just being, like, a respectful customer.

[A]

A respectful patron.

[B]

Yes. Got it. Got it. Wow, you're very. You're very kind.

[A]

Well, in my acting life. See, was that Good acting.

[B]

Very good. You should go out for some. Like, you can do.

[A]

I'm just kind of scarred from the one time I auditioned for Law and Order SVU and I didn't get it. Now, again, I was too beautiful for the role. We know this. I've told the story a million times, but it. Rejection hurts. And actually, in terms of all the jobs that, like, I would be fit for, I think I would sooner set of chairs at the beach because, you guys know that's like, actually my nightmare job being, like a hotel beach attendant having to, like, sweat in the sun, put up chairs and umbrellas. But I might be better suited for that than I would be for acting because, like, I like rejection. And me, we. We are not friends. You have to.

[B]

Yeah, there's a lot of things that you're not cut out.

[A]

Like, yeah, my mental health. Like, I would be on alert if I was like a concerned family member of mine because I. I really would not be able to take it.

[B]

Yeah. Okay, so no. Chris Knoth is taking a dig at his Sex in the City co star, Sarah Jessica Parker, in an expletive filled Instagram post.

[A]

You know, I am giggling. I'm just thinking. I don't know if you saw. I don't know if you watched every single Maternity Leave episode, but Joey Cavasa said the funniest thing. I was like, we were talking about guns, and I'm like, do you have a gun or would you have a gun? He's like, I couldn't.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

I'm like, why? He's like, have I ever looked back?

[B]

Sorry.

[A]

If I ever walked past the mirror and looked bad, I would kill myself. He is so funny. Like, seriously, sometimes, like, I'm just giggling.

[B]

He's a threat to himself.

[A]

Yeah, right.

[B]

Understand? Know thyself 100.

[A]

And he said, like. Because his. His joke is that, like, his biggest enemy in this life is his inner saboteur. Okay, sorry. Oh, yeah, Chris Noth. I did see this.

[B]

So he posted a snap of himself working out in the gym and he wrote, fuck New Year's, let's go. And. And then someone commented saying, you mean Fudge SJP in her award, right? Lol. She won, like, an honorary award at the Golden Globes. Did she, like, give a speech and everything?

[A]

Yeah, the Carol Burnett Award. Matthew Broderick was there. Like, a bunch of people made videos. It was like a big, you know, bat mitzvah type of affair.

[B]

So the person said, you mean fuck her and her award. Right? And he responded saying, right.

[A]

I feel like, that's actually not what he meant because, like, the picture was.

[B]

Like Jim, it was very like new me.

[A]

So I actually, I don't think there was subtext within this particular caption. Although I do believe he hates Sarah Jessica Parker. I would love to see him and Kim Cattrall get together because they're literally the I hate Sarah club. Now, if I recall, there were allegations against Chris Noth after the first season of. And just like that, and he got fired. Everybody said, like, you're guilty, we're out. He maintained his innocence. You know, I'm sure at the time it was like really challenging. Although now in hindsight, getting fired from that show, like, was probably one of the better things to happen to him. I don't know, like, enough about the allegations. Like, remember if, if, if he was like, like really guilty or like really not. I just feel like as like a woman in Hollywood, like, she wouldn't be caught dead even like defending this person who she's known for 20 years.

[B]

Right. And like recast in the next show. Even though she had done working with him and could have gotten away scot free. But.

[A]

Right.

[B]

In the next show.

[A]

Right.

[B]

If he was this bad guy and everyone. But again, I don't know anything about the allegations and literally I'm not stepping in this because, like, like, seriously watching just like that, like, these people are not my issue.

[A]

There was just like, not my place stories today. Not my place.

[B]

Right.

[A]

And I want to talk about the picture. I think it looked very handsome in.

[B]

This picture with the dumbbells with the gains. Making gains. Yeah, he is handsome and he looks handsome.

[A]

Did he ever do anything acting wise outside of the show?

[B]

I feel like. Yeah, I feel like he's like.

[A]

Like what?

[B]

He just. I just.

[A]

Oh, I actually.

[B]

I know what Tom Selleck. I feel like he's in one of those shows, you know, a csi.

[A]

I know law. No, no, like with Juliana Margulies. What's that show? The Good Lawyer or something? What?

[B]

The Good Wife.

[A]

Is that Juliana Margulies?

[B]

I'll go to his IMDb.

[A]

I feel like it is. Yeah, yeah.

[B]

The Good Wife.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Is he still on the Good Wife?

[A]

Are you guys shocked that I know Juliana Margulies? If you're like, I'm good.

[B]

I know you want to keep saying her name.

[A]

Zionist queen Julietta Margulies.

[B]

Beautiful. You should watch A Good Life.

[A]

You know what I watched last night? I restarted the pit. Not restarted. Sorry. New season.

[B]

Great.

[A]

That show is so good. And you know, I'm. Because it was just nominated and everyone was talking about it. I didn't know, like, the lore behind it.

[B]

So the Good wife ended in 2016.

[A]

The. The actor from the Pit, Noah Weil.

[B]

Also Jewish king, looks like Adam Sandler.

[A]

If Adam Sandler were good looking.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. No, I just. I never saw him before. And then I was seeing him at the award show. I said, oh, Adam Sandler wore a suit.

[A]

Suit.

[B]

And it was not him.

[A]

Okay, they. They. Maybe you were looking at Adam Sandler. Like, they don't look alike. And Adam Sandler was there.

[B]

Okay, wait.

[A]

No, A while. W, Y, L, E. I'm on my way.

[B]

Adam Sandler.

[A]

Let me see. What are you talking about? Dr. Robbie? Hold on.

[B]

Like, in some. Okay. In some pictures and, like, from far away.

[A]

And if I close my eyes. Yeah, it looks just like him. Well, I started season two of the Pit, which is one of my favorite shows, and I didn't know. So he was like, like, okay, look at this.

[B]

This still of the Pit that looks like Adam Sandler. Can you agree? Like, it's tiny.

[A]

Sure. Like, whatever. I just.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

He, like, kind of came out of nowhere, but I didn't realize he was an actor on ER with George Clooney. And then, like, he didn't really take off in the way.

[B]

He loves playing a doctor, though. He's got the chops.

[A]

My phone is calling me, saying, someone's calling you. Maybe Claudio Sherry. Claudia Ostrei.

[B]

Okay, pick up. It's you. Hello? Claudio Sherry.

[A]

Hi.

[B]

Is it Claudio? It sounds like a man. It sounds like Claudio Sherry.

[A]

Yes. Can I just call you back in, like, a couple of minutes? Yeah, that's fine. That's fine.

[B]

What a crazy show today.

[A]

Yeah, today's show is definitely manic, a.

[B]

Little wacky, you know? Is Claudio okay?

[A]

Like, I don't know why it said Claudio. Like, one time I must have, like, been at something and, like, made a pledge to, like, so. And I never fulfilled the pledge. And they always call. I'm like, I'm happy to pay, but, like, like, please don't call me. I'm always like, email me, email. And they never follow up via email. They just, like, call back. I will fulfill my pledge at some point in my lifetime.

[B]

They have to make it, like, simpler. How would you fulfill your pledge over the phone? Even, you know, credit card?

[A]

Like. Yeah, correct.

[B]

Do not call me. Do not come. I won't be picking up the phone.

[A]

Don't call me.

[B]

I agree.

[A]

Claudio Sherry.

[B]

You know, there's a feature on your phone that, like, numbers that you don't have Saved. Like they won't ring for you.

[A]

They like screen it and. Yeah, I don't like that either.

[B]

Well, I was missing, like, really important.

[A]

Of course.

[B]

I unfortunately had to turn this.

[A]

That off. Oh, I didn't even know you could turn it off. I actually need to. It's annoying as the screening. Oh. Anytime they've screened a call, it's something I, I desperately need.

[B]

Oh, now they only screen like spam, which calls me every day.

[A]

Okay, I need to figure that out.

[B]

Our next story. Oscar winning actress Jennifer Lawrence identifies as a stay at home mom. She said. So Jennifer Lawrence went on Smartless. I'm sure she did a lot of stuff. Oh my God, why? That's like, perfect for her.

[A]

Well, first of all, Jennifer Lawrence went on a podcast and nobody knows about it because they don't have video. So like, that's just annoying to watch somebody beautiful. Like, we have to listen. No, thanks.

[B]

Things.

[A]

And two, like, I'm just so sick of those guys. Honestly, I'm fine with them.

[B]

Like, I know I'm sick of them like for the, for the bit. But like, like for real, I, I think they're, you know, fine.

[A]

Okay, whatever.

[B]

Anyway, she said I identify as a stay at home mom. She said that she's obviously working and recently had to juggle a hectic schedule. I normally have a busy three months while I'm filming, but even in that sense, it's calm because there's nothing else to do. I just go to work, I do that, I come home, I sleep, and then I do it again. And then like two weeks while you promote it is hectic.

[A]

You know, I could see people rolling their eyes at this. But I do like this. She is not a celebrity who actively works a lot. She's not like going to a lot of events and doing a lot of brand deals and filming eight TV shows and three movies. She does like maybe a movie a year and she's in that one Dior commercial. Like, yeah, those couple of weeks where she's working, the kid's dad can chip in. And I'm sure she's an act.

[B]

She does like two weeks of press, like she said. Yeah, Again, busy two weeks, but yeah, I guess so. Say it's four weeks out of the year that she's super busy, but still, even is like around available. And then the rest of the months is a stay at home mom. That's like a nice way to think. Think about it. Yeah.

[A]

I don't find this offensive as a mother.

[B]

No, I didn't. I thought it was Sweet.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Do you consider yourself a stay at home mom?

[A]

No, only because I really don't like to stay at home with the baby. Like, oh, my God. Time moves so slow when you're just, like, sitting around the house. Even if you're doing, like, the good, engaging, like, mat time and all that. I'm like, let's just go somewhere. That's why I went to your house yesterday. Like, I can't just sit around in the house with the kid. Like, yeah. It's so slow and boring. Yeah. So I'm like, no. And I know. I don't consider myself a stay at home mom. I'm like a part time working mom. I don't know.

[B]

What stay at home working mom?

[A]

I don't know. But I'm not staying at home because we work here. So, like, I don't know. Yeah. And I have my studio in the city. Like, I have to leave.

[B]

Try and change lanes.

[A]

Yeah, right. And try and kill people, myself included, while changing lanes.

[B]

Are you ready for our fifth and final story?

[A]

I am. Are you?

[B]

I would say just choose your own adventure, but I've heard my choice. But Nikki Glaser is revealing the Cindy Sweeney joke that she cut from the 2026 Golden Globes. I actually love this when people I.

[A]

Like when she tells us what share.

[B]

Like, jokes that they cut. She. So she shared a bunch of jokes that she cut with Howard Stern. Yes.

[A]

This has become, like, a tradition after last year she went on Howard Stern. After the Tom Brady row, she went on Howard Turn.

[B]

And she shares.

[A]

She does, like, the segment where she reads the jokes that she was gonna say.

[B]

Yeah. And then she, like, explains why she cut them. And I guess Sydney wasn't at the award show, which is why she cut this one. But she said people just aren't going to the theater to see things. If you don't believe me. There was a movie this year where Sydney Sweeney played a lesbian who just bounced around in T shorts for two hours and it made $14.

[A]

What movie?

[B]

The Christie. Like the boxer.

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's funny. That's like a good joke. And I think that it's unoffensive. Is like, if Sydney was there, like, it would have been fine.

[B]

It's a little demeaning.

[A]

Well, it depends what type of comic you want to be. Right. A man could never say it. First of all, oh, my God.

[B]

Jail.

[A]

Jail. Like, literally prison.

[B]

Lock him up.

[A]

And I don't know. I don't know how Sydney feels about Sydney's self. Do you know what I Mean, like, she is this like modern day, sort of like Marilyn Monroe, like, sex figure.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Sexy woman. And that's been an intentional choice on her part, so.

[B]

And she leans into it. But I also feel like this movie, that actually might have hurt her feelings more because this movie was her. Her serious passion project and she blended it herself.

[A]

It did make three. 14 is generous. It made $3.

[B]

And it wasn't about her, like, jumping around in tiny shorts.

[A]

Right.

[B]

It was about. About the story.

[A]

Anyone but you was like a movie about her body. Like.

[B]

Yeah, it was very.

[A]

It was like very male gaze.

[B]

Yeah. And this was like serious and hey, like, eyes don't look at me. Yeah. Yeah. So I think it probably would have. I mean, yeah, it's a little. It's a little offensive.

[A]

It's a well written joke, though.

[B]

You won't catch me saying anything negative about any Sweeney, especially not today. She met with two hostages last few days, Noah Argamani and Avinatan Orr. So she's my queen a thousand percent. So we're not making jokes at her. Me excuse expense.

[A]

No. Mark Ruffalo, on the other hand, it's getting worse. He is really. He's getting really so crazy.

[B]

And you know what's like, really? He's so crazy and he's in every movie. Like every year he's at these awards was because people keep putting him in movies. Like, no matter how crazy he is, he just says like the nuttiest things, like, about everything. And it's like, someone's gonna cast him again tomorrow, like, run it back and do it again. We're gonna have to see him at the next show and the next show and the next show.

[A]

And it's just so crazy because, like. And this is just. Just regardless of my feelings about Mark Ruffalo, Hollywood is like a very vain, shallow industry. And, like, in terms of men who are aging well, Mark Ruffalo is really not one of them. Like, he actually, like, I'm sorry to be mean, like, looks terrible. And like, if that was a woman, like, seriously, she would never work again. How Mark Ruffalo is more booked and busy than ever. When he seriously never looked worse. No.

[B]

When he's like, actually a raving lunatic. And I feel like most of the time, like, when someone's a raving lunatic, it's like, okay, like, we're going to put you out to pass. Right.

[A]

He must have great agents.

[B]

Yeah. Maybe he's a good actor, you know.

[A]

Like, I mean, just like heaven was so good.

[B]

Like, I'm.

[A]

I will still watch that movie because I shouldn't suffer.

[B]

Yeah. Maybe he's just like the best man for the job of the acting, which requires a raving lunatic.

[A]

Acting is really not that hard. Like, there's no way. There's no way. Yeah, there is. This, like, children's books. I must have gotten it. I didn't buy it myself. It just like, made its way. It's called the Gruffalo and it's about this like, made up creature in the forest called the Gruffalo. And then like, spoiler alert, the Gruffalo exists. It's like these will the beast like this ugly big. Yeah, the Gruffalo. That person obviously listens to the toast. Whoever wrote the book.

[B]

Did you buy that book?

[A]

No, I said it made its way towards me in like a gift or something. I did not buy it. I kind of like it. Okay. Yeah, it's cute.

[B]

It has a nice message. Does it rhyme?

[A]

Yeah, of course. I don't mess around with books that don't rhyme.

[B]

Reminder. Cameron Counselor.

[A]

Literally the only book worth having. I'm being dead serious.

[B]

And we were talking last night. You were at my house and you were like, what book should I get? I need a new book. Books. I think we're gonna go to the bookstore. Which is always really fun.

[A]

Yeah. Because like, I just have a problem. Maybe I'm just like a protective mother, but I was like, reading this book, like, about a dog and the dog is not listening to his mom. And like, that's the whole point of the book. Why the would I be reading that?

[B]

Like, give him any ideas.

[A]

I'm like, burning books.

[B]

Yeah. I'll give you.

[A]

I find problems every day.

[B]

What's. As he lives.

[A]

Of course. Rainbow Fish is a communist. Like, I find issues in all books. And I'm trying not to be this, like, sort of nitpicky mother, but it's. We need to go to Barnes Noble.

[B]

And sometimes I feel like there's bad behavior throughout the book. And by the end, like, it does get better. But sometimes, like, the kids don't have the. Like don't want to eat through till the end. So, like, they're just getting up in the middle of the book when like, this child behaves so poorly and he's.

[A]

Like, being rewarded for it. No, I don't mess around like that.

[B]

Right. And the lesson doesn't come until the end. But it's too late. By the way.

[A]

We're asleep.

[B]

They didn't finish the book.

[A]

Of course.

[B]

Another issue. But you don't see that in Cameron. The counts where she's a queen throughout. I think we can call it.

[A]

Did we do five stories? Like, I just feel like the stories, like I said, were an Inconvenient truth. But this was definitely one of our better episodes.

[B]

And we'll leave you with that.

[A]

Thank you so much for listening to.

[B]

The Tell me Lies recap tomorrow. Can we say that I'll be ready?

[A]

I'll try.

[B]

Oh my God. This so not like you. You're always like ball busting me. Like watch your shows, do your homework.

[A]

I am.

[B]

You like watch all this stuff this weekend and you were so like, watch happy.

[A]

Yeah, I'll try. Thank you guys so much for listening to the trustedly talented we are.

[B]

Love ya. Bye.

[C]

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[A]

Experian.