Toast Herstory: I Don’t Like YOU (Original Airdate April 3rd, 2024)

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Toast

Episode: Toast Herstory: I Don’t Like YOU (Original Airdate April 3, 2024)

Release Date: August 21, 2025
Hosts: Jackie & Claudia Oshry (Dear Media)

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Episode Overview

This episode of “The Toast” is a quintessential blend of humor, candid banter, pop culture deep dives, and real-life advice, courtesy of sisters Jackie and Claudia Oshry. Titled “Toast Herstory: I Don’t Like YOU,” the conversation meanders from birthday tributes and restaurant anxieties to reality TV recaps and listener advice. The sisters' dynamic is as relatable and razor-sharp as ever, touching on everything from personal relationships and style dilemmas to Bravo fandom and the etiquette of April Fool’s pranks.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Weekly Catch-Up and Birthday Talk

• Days of the Week Rituals:
  The sisters acknowledge their ongoing bit of obsessing over the days of the week, musing about their self-awareness as a sign of maturity.
• Ben’s Birthday:
  Claudia celebrates husband Ben’s birthday on-air with a mix of humor and affection—half roasting, half gushing about his supportiveness, quirks, and their healthy method of “using the podcast as a vent.”

  “Ben, I know you’ll never hear this because you don’t support my podcast... but I love you. You’re a great husband, a great father... Really 10 out of 10. Couldn’t ask for anyone better. Except for Joe Manganiello…”
  (Claudia, 04:36)

• Gift Shopping Debrief:
  Claudia recounts her last-minute scramble for a birthday present, debating between practical (William Sonoma cooking gadgets) and thoughtful (designer, olive oil, knives).
• Spritz Society Shoutout:
  “Biggest sale of the year” for Ben’s birthday; listeners are encouraged to shop in his honor.

2. Restaurant Culture & Fashion Confessions

• Rainy Day Style and Restaurant Snobbery:
  Lightly mocking the judgmental atmosphere of Manhattan restaurants, Claudia laments her “moon boots and leggings” look ("Gap tooth to the back") while pondering the types who dine with "Chanel wellies and drivers."
• Closet Management Woes:
  Both hosts discuss the eternal struggle of having too many clothes, outgrowing items, and fighting for hanger space.

  “Number one rule: you cannot buy new clothes until you have hangers in your closet. If you don’t, that means you need to purge.”
  (Claudia, 13:17)

• Sponsor Integration:
  Rails, the new clothing sponsor, earns praise—the sisters compare favorite pieces from the brand.

3. Pop Culture & Reality TV Recap

• Vanderpump Rules Drama (20:00-38:30):
  A hefty segment dives deep into current VPR storylines—Jax and Brittany’s separation, production company gossip, the tangled web of Katie, Schwartz, Lala, and Sheena, and Ariana’s rage post-cheating scandal with Tom Sandoval.
  • Jackie and Claudia dissect motivations, alliances, and pathos of cast members.
  • Notable commentary highlights how Ariana’s ongoing anger post-breakup may be hindering her personal growth, and how show dynamics have radically shifted.
  • The sisters empathize with certain characters and call out others for hypocrisy, specifically discussing the handling of “the dog incident.”

    “Her anger towards Tom is bringing her down because it’s making her kind of a misery.”
    (Claudia, 27:51)

• Kelly Ripa & Programming Faux Pas (40:00):
  The rerun of Kelly & Mark’s 2023 segment fawning over Diddy is unintentionally hilarious and awkward in light of current headlines.

  “That’s really like bad programming. Like, care less.”
  (Jackie, 41:20)

• Platform Dreaming:
  The hosts speculate aloud about “The Toast” being acquired by various media companies (Max, Apple, Netflix), each with their own reasons.
• Gen Z Musings:
  Jackie voices concern over youthful radicalization online, ultimately chalking some of it up to “kids being kids.”

4. Celebrity News Quick Hits

• Nicole Richie’s Kids & Movie Premiere (46:00):
  Nicole Richie and Joel Madden's children appear at the “Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead” remake, with Nicole playing "Rose." The hosts nostalgically praise the original movie.
• Lizzo’s 'I Quit' Statement (49:00):
  Lizzo clarifies she’s stepping back from negativity, not music. Claudia is skeptical about the wisdom of her continued public-facing response.
• J.Lo’s Tour Rebrand (51:43):
  Discussion of J.Lo quietly shifting her tour to “Greatest Hits” amid poor ticket sales—both agree it’s a smart, “icon level” pivot that aligns better with her legacy.

5. ‘Dear Toasters’ Advice Segment (58:18)

• Last Name ‘Duty’:
  Listener updates about wrestling with taking an unfortunate last name, ultimately finding compromise by using her maiden name professionally.
  • Jackie: “My advice is to kind of reframe it in your head and find the joy in the ‘Duty.’”
• Marriage & Cemetery Plot Disputes:
  A listener struggles with where and how to be buried with her husband. The sisters admit confusion and advocate for not dwelling on it prematurely.
  • Claudia: “I want to say, like, I don’t care... God forbid, in a million years when I die, the people around me who know and love me will advocate for the best place.”
• April Fool’s Gone Wrong:
  A prank on a boyfriend reveals he’s eager to text back an admirer; both hosts tell the listener to break up, noting she sounds “like a battered woman.”

  “Break up with him. He will cheat on you—he probably has.”
  (Claudia, 69:09)

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Memorable Quotes

• “We use this platform as a punching bag with our husbands ... it’s the best thing for our marriage.”
  (Claudia, 01:25)
• “I feel like you shouldn’t buy him some designer does today—go to Williams Sonoma and get him like a really cool cooking gadget.”
  (Jackie, 02:38)
• “You finish each other’s sandwiches.”
  (Claudia, 09:33)
• “Her anger towards Tom is bringing her down because it’s making her like kind of a misery.”
  (Claudia, 27:51)
• “If you own something, there’s nothing cooler than that ... Own it. Wear it with pride.”—on the “Duty” last name
  (Jackie, 62:40)
• “Just stop talking about this. Seriously. It’s harmful to your relationship.”—on the burial/cremation dispute
  (Jackie, 67:40)
• “Break up with him. He will cheat on you—he probably has.” (Claudia, 69:09)

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Timestamps for Notable Segments

• Ben’s Birthday & Marital Venting: 01:17 – 06:33
• Restaurant & Closet Confessions: 09:39 – 15:40
• Vanderpump Rules Recap: 20:00 – 38:30
• Kelly Ripa Rerun Mishap & Media Company Dreams: 40:06 – 45:41
• Nicole Richie, Lizzo, J.Lo News: 45:59 – 54:07
• ‘Dear Toasters’ Advice Segment: 58:18 – End

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Overall Tone and Takeaways

The episode maintains The Toast’s unique mix of off-the-cuff humor, pop culture loyalty, and genuine sisterly support. Jackie and Claudia navigate their topics with self-awareness, sarcasm, and strong opinions—never shying away from blunt advice or honest reflections about marriage, celebrity, or their own lives. Listeners are left entertained, equipped with fresh hot takes, and reminded of the power of laughing at both life and ourselves.

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Transcript

[A]

Good morning, millennials.

[B]

Welcome back to the toast and happy Wednesday. That's right, it is Wednesday. It is hump day. It is middle of the week. You did it. Congrats, grads. How you doing, Jax?

[A]

You're doing it. We're on our way to the last half things. We're doing the week it the days of the week. I wonder if we'll ever mature enough to stop talking. I don't think so. It's your main. The episode that's part of being a weekly podcast. Daily podcast.

[B]

It's part of being human, first of all. And second of all, I like how you say mature. Like, I think it's probably the most mature thing about us, how we're so self aware. We're always observing our surroundings, our circumstances. I think it's really indicative of not only, you know, high maturity, but also high intelligence.

[A]

Not mature. Evolve past. You know, because everything. The jokes change on the show all the time, but kind of like the one constant is the day are the days of the week.

[B]

And I guess like Hubermeister isn't on his podcast talking about the days of the week, even though I think in an odd sense he is.

[A]

But he also drops weekly. We can't compare ourselves to those slackers.

[B]

Yeah, we can't compare ourselves to people who don't work nearly as hard as.

[A]

We do to weekly slackers.

[B]

Yeah, it's attack and blame and shame.

[A]

And blame and shame. Speaking of my favorite person to blame, who's my favorite person to blame?

[B]

Ben.

[A]

It's his birthday.

[B]

It is his birthday. And then, you know, I feel like we use this platform a lot. Really is like a punching bag with our husbands. And honestly, I feel like it's the best things for our marriage. Honestly, like, I think you and I both have, you know, knock wood. Knock wood, really healthy, strong marriages. Because we have a platform in which we can just commiserate and vent. I mean, then we don't go home and take it out on our husbands like other women do. Like, for real.

[A]

It's true, I think.

[B]

But today, let's make an exception. Today is Ben's birthday. And actually Ben was supposed to be on a work trip. He was supposed to leave at 5am this morning, but there's like a crazy storm up here in the northeast. Like he can't go anywhere. It's been postponed. So I had planned nothing, like for the actual day. So I look like a piece of.

[A]

No, he must know that.

[B]

Yeah, you know, of course. But we made last minute lunch plans. I've got A last minute balloon delivery on its way. And on my way to lunch, I gotta go buy a gift because I was spent. I was planning on spending the day buying him a gift.

[A]

What are you thinking?

[B]

I don't know. I like was really nice when I was in St. Barts and I bought my. I was at Prada, like buying myself things and I bought him a Prada wallet which I should have just held the fuck onto like a big dope. But I got home and he was like, how was your day? And I was just so excited. Like I was like, I got you a wallet. Then the next day he actually left the wallet in a cab. Thank God we found it, we tracked it down. But yeah, that's just kind of husband I have. Oh my God. I have to stop. Today was supposed to be positive for sure.

[A]

I just feel like you shouldn't like buy him some designer does today. Like I feel like if we think you should, you know where you should go for his birthday gift?

[B]

Where?

[A]

To like William Sonoma or Sir Latabo and get him like a really cool kick like cooking gadget.

[B]

That's a great idea. But then it becomes my problem.

[A]

Why? They have beautiful things. You could find something that would be cool for cooking.

[B]

Do you know what he bought? We have a KitchenAid mixer we got. It was on our registry. Like, you know that $500 thing that everybody puts on their registry.

[A]

It's a rite of passage.

[B]

Ask me how many times we've used it in our seven year marriage.

[A]

Probably zero, zero. It's still one plastic. Once you use it once, you will use it more. But first you have to take it out of the plastic. You have to see like how life changing it is.

[B]

So we've never used it. And Ben decided over the weekend to buy a new attachment for it, a meat grinder. He's like, we can make our own sausage. I'm like, you're.

[A]

You're never gonna make sausage. Are you gonna be eating sausage?

[B]

Of course not.

[A]

That would be the craziest like thing that would have been. That sounds like an April Fool's party. Claudia's making an eating sausage.

[B]

But I do kind of love the idea of going to like William Sonoma. I'll. I'll add it to the list. But wow, we took a real digression there. It's so hard.

[A]

Get him like a gorgeous premium olive oil.

[B]

Okay. I feel like I could do better than that.

[A]

No, no, no. Like a really fancy olive oil. Like he would. That's thoughtful. It helps you by the Way I love it. Really fancy olive oil.

[B]

So backtracking before I started complaining.

[A]

He loves a good knife.

[B]

Yes. Backtracking to before I started complaining. I feel like. Oh, you know, a lot of the days we come out here and we say, good guys this, good guys that, not so good guys, you know? But today I wanted to say this. Ben, I know you'll never hear this because you don't support my podcast, and it's another issue in our marriage, but.

[A]

Because the people who rat on us will never send the nice things that we say.

[B]

On the off chance that this, you know, makes its way across your desk, let me say this. I love you. You're a great husband, a great father. Really. A really great father. I hope this year is filled with joy and happiness and peace. You know, Ben and I were talking last night. It was a tough year for Ben. He lost Theo, which really was, I want to say, much harder on Ben than it was on me. I mean, it was really hard on me, but Ben took it really. You know, Ben's never lost, Knock wood. You know, I've been through it. He hasn't. So I hope for this year, happiness, joy, success, prosperity and peace and health, and I love you so much, and you're an amazing husband, even though I joke. Really, 10 out of 10. Couldn't ask for anyone better. Except for Joe Manganiello. But, you know, let's not bring him up, you know?

[A]

Yeah, yeah. No need to, like, compare Ben to, you know, who's the worst husband.

[B]

Honestly, it's Brock from Reba. I, like, I can't get over it. He's so awful. Just awful.

[A]

I was going to say, like, Scott Peterson, but have you seen.

[B]

Oh, man.

[A]

That.

[B]

Oh, man.

[A]

There's like a. A movement of people who are believing Scott Peterson now. Like, it's come full circle, and now they're thinking maybe he didn't do it.

[B]

Okay. There's also, like, a movement of people who support Osama bin Laden. Like, who gives a fuck? You know?

[A]

No, I'm saying this is really making its way.

[B]

The mentally ill are gonna stay mentally ill, and as long as us mentally, well, people remember that, and we don't let them get to us. We'll be okay, you guys.

[A]

Yeah. So I'm glad that that's not Ben all said.

[B]

No, it's not. Well, tbd. It's not. He's the best.

[A]

Keep saying nice things to be.

[B]

Yeah, he's the best. And we love him dearly here at the toast. He's, you know, he's Always there for us. He fills in when we need him to. He's great for the content. He's always up for a good joke. And you know, Ben, I love ya. I really do. I love ya.

[A]

Happy birthday, Ben. Oh, and Spritz is celebrating in a big way.

[B]

They are biggest sale of the year, 24 hours. The code is BSC32 stands for Ben. Softer celebrity is turning 3232 do. And that's a big discount. We don't really do that. So BSC32spritz society.com. if you want to do anything nice for Ben's offer, you will like go to the website, click around, maybe buy something. Like that means more. Like Spritz means more to Ben than I do, you know.

[A]

And that's not true.

[B]

Honestly. For his birthday, I should just place a mega order on the website.

[A]

Like you should.

[B]

Ben is like always like monitoring Spritz and like when people, they're. Some people order.

[A]

That would make his day.

[B]

Some people order like for bachelorette parties or even for their weddings. And they order like bulk amounts. And Ben will go to like the highest amount and like literally add product to their order and send them a thank you note. Like he's obsessed. I'll do it. That's my gift.

[A]

Whatever. You are going to spend it like Louis Vuitton or Williams Sonoma. Spend at Spritz.

[B]

Love that.

[A]

And then like send it to like a worthy toaster Love. Because I'm sure you don't planning a wedding. I'm sure you don't need more Spritz in your house. If it's anything like my house. Yeah, we're stocked more Spritz than water.

[B]

So it's a great day. I'll be out with the celebrity all afternoon. I had to clear my schedule because I got to take care of the birthday boy. So that'll be great. We're going to lunch. I do have half of his gift purchased. I mentioned it on the Patreon. I'm gonna give it to him today. So should I say it? I don't want any bitch. These bitches to spoil it.

[A]

Let's put trust in the audience. Even though I trust the audience, I just don't trust the rats. But like, let's give them a chance to not disappoint us.

[B]

No. And like by the time this episode is up, I'll be giving it to him an hour later.

[A]

Yeah, I think we're fine. And he won't be on his phone because he'll be with his darling wife.

[B]

The first half of the gift that I got him is, of course, just so happens Ben's birthday week, Olivia Rodrigo's performing at Madison Square Garden, like four different nights.

[A]

Oh, yeah, I knew that.

[B]

So I'm getting. I already got those for Saturday night.

[A]

Oh, I knew that. I thought it was gonna be something I didn't know, which is why I made you say it. But yeah, we did take a big chance now.

[B]

Oh, fuck. Should we cut it out?

[A]

No, no, no. I'm saying, like, let's see if people have learned.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then if someone does message him, well, name, shame and blame them.

[B]

Oh, by the way, if somebody does message, I'm like, I will be sending them. I'm gonna find their name and then find their address and I will, like, get on one of those, like, monthly annoying prank mail things where they send you a glitter bomb, a bag of, you know, like, I will do that to you. So just be prepared.

[A]

Love it.

[B]

And I'm a woman of my word. Like, I will follow up.

[A]

Love it. Name, shame and blame.

[B]

So we've got Ben today we've got Dear Toasters. They're fabulous. We have an update. We have a couple really funny ones. We also have stories. Describe them for me in perhaps, let's say six words.

[A]

Wow, six. Okay. They are good. They're not great.

[B]

A conjunction, that's like six and a half words, but I'll allow it.

[A]

I've. I'm within the box you put me.

[B]

You know why I'll allow it?

[A]

Why? Cuz I love a conjunction junction. What's your function?

[B]

Thank you. We finish each other's sandwiches.

[A]

I want a sandwich.

[B]

I would not turn us. Oh, and also we're going out for like the celebratory lunch or you want to lunch? Well, I don't want to like, get stabbed, so I'll tell you. Okay, let me tell you. We've eaten there.

[A]

Of course.

[B]

They have a few locations in Manhattan.

[A]

Is it one of our usuals for.

[B]

No. Okay, I'll just text it to you. I love texting.

[A]

I love texting. And this is like, this is not. People will find out on your Instagram later where you went.

[B]

And it's a place where, like, the food is, like, really indulgent. Especially, like, you know.

[A]

Which one. Which one?

[B]

The one. They're all.

[A]

Menus are a little different.

[B]

The one near, you know, us.

[A]

Okay. Oh, that's really fancy. Yeah, I know.

[B]

And it's raining, so I look like a piece of slob with my moon boots.

[A]

Oh, they're gonna see you in the back.

[B]

I know. It's one of those restaurants where it's like, oh, they'll clock you the second you walk in. Gap tooth to the back. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

No Tom and Delvey thing.

[B]

It's not vip. It's not rubbish.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I don't like you. Actually. That's not Anna Delvey. That's Michaela.

[A]

That's the mater d at the restaurant you're going to. Adam.

[B]

Michaela's favorite thing to say is, I don't like it. That's when she's like, stop, Claudia. Like, please stop. She goes, I don't like it. I don't like it. And I guess I maybe took it too far one day, just, like, with my love and devotion whiskering. So instead of saying, I don't like it, she literally pointed at me and she was like. And every time I recreate it, I put it in the Anna Delvey voice. But she did have a little bit of Anna Delvey to where she goes, I don't like you. And honestly, the room went still silence from everyone. It was chilling because she really took it up a level, not only with the accent, but also, I don't like it. It's different than I don't like you.

[A]

You dead in the eye, finger in your face.

[B]

She also kind of wagged, wiggled her for I don't like you went around the room.

[A]

Who's it gonna land on?

[B]

I don't like you. And now we can't say it. And that's exactly what the maitre d at this restaurant would do. It'd be like, oh, leggings out of luck. Yeah, I'm wearing leggings. I needed to wear something tucked into my rain boots. Like, I can't. I'm just a victim of circumstance.

[A]

That's so you. It's like you. You feel like that gets you out of, like, victim culture. If you blame it on victim of circumstance.

[B]

What else am I supposed to wear in the rain walking around working. I'm a working woman. I. Bills to pay. I'm not just this lady who can, like, walk around in stilettos with her driver, you know?

[A]

Yeah, I know.

[B]

Those are the type of people that eat at this restaurant.

[A]

Yeah. You should see their mean of transportation when they leave. Like, what are they changing their shoes?

[B]

They're not like.

[A]

Or they're wearing, like, Chanel wellies.

[B]

No, they might be wearing Chanel wellies. Or they're literally wearing stilettos and they'd walk three steps to their driver.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, I'm a Working woman.

[B]

I'm a woman of the people. I'm a woman of the streets.

[A]

You are.

[B]

But I am wearing Jenny Kane, so, like, yeah, maybe I can see it at the front.

[A]

That brings up the group average.

[B]

It does, it does. You look cute today. Pretty in pink. Are you experiencing, you know, days of rain like we are?

[A]

No, am I? No, I'm not. But I did place a huge order of new clothes, like, daily clothes last night. And so until it arrives, like, I'm just like, these are placeholders.

[B]

You know, these days don't count.

[A]

I don't need to, like, try and find, like a busing outfit. Like, it's all coming. I'm just need to get there, you know, I.

[B]

Okay, so I'm at the phase.

[A]

I kind of, like, gave up, but I get it. I got my slut strand. So that, like, gives me a couple points.

[B]

I'm at the phase where I desperately need to clean out my closet. I can't buy stuff because I'm out of hangers.

[A]

Me too. I'm. I. I know you said I can't.

[B]

But I bought more hangers. Number one rule. You cannot buy new clothes until you're. If you don't have hangers in your closet, like, loose to hang up the new clothes, that means you need to purge.

[A]

However, I have purged, like, a lot, just over time. And I'm in a place right now where I have so, so many clothes because I have so many size clothes. Like, I have all of my old clothes, which. That's fair, right? I feel like it's a loophole and I get a pass because I have all my old clothes, which, as you saw, like, I'm still going to wear them one day. I gift, like, they're for everyone. They're great clothes. Then I have, like, my clothes that I wear right now that I need. Of course. Then I have, like, pregnancy clothes.

[B]

Of course. By the way, you're allowed that. I understand. I'm not experiencing a transition.

[A]

You never know what you're going to need and when. And like, I. I can't be, like, buying new stuff again, like, whenever.

[B]

Where do you put the new clothing?

[A]

So I have the hanging space because I do have a big closet and I could, like, smush. Things aren't totally smushed yet.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

But I don't want to get to a place of totally smush. That's not ideal. But I need a array of sizes. Like, I literally have everything from extra small up until extra large. And I need it that way right now.

[B]

That's fair. That's fair. I just need to devote some time because I placed a very, very small order from Zara because I needed, like, I needed, like, two capsule collection item wardrobes. And I feel like Zara is a good place. Like, before you spend money on, like, a big, expensive thing, see if you like it from Zara. So I just got, like, I needed a pair of nice black, like, trouser shorts, and I needed a nice spring coat, and they're just sitting on the dining room table. Like, that drives me insane when there's no space for it. And I don't like shoving it into my closet because you shove it and then you don't ever. Like, you can't see it. So you're never gonna wear this new item that you just bought.

[A]

Why do you have those nice spring coats from Theory?

[B]

I do. I do. I was, like, 60 pounds heavier when I bought them, so they're, like, a little big on me. I still wear them.

[A]

They're the kind that could. They're kind of, like, one size.

[B]

I still wear them, but, like, I want something new, like, something a little bit longer.

[A]

Out with the old and in with the new.

[B]

Goodbye. Clouds of gray Low skies of blue.

[A]

Okay, I can understand that. I could relate.

[B]

And also, we just got. I got so much clothing. Rails is one of the new toe sponsors, which actually they're sponsoring. Their first episode is Today. We're obsessed with them. I get so much clothing from them, and they sent me clothing, which is like a dream, and it's literally sitting on my dining room table. It's pissing me off.

[A]

I pretty much already worn everything that they sent.

[B]

So did I.

[A]

Ready for the next round? The one outfit that they sent that we both have, I think I've worn it five times, and I got it twice two weeks ago.

[B]

I wore it twice and haven't taken any pictures in it yet. So, like, I'm ready for a third.

[A]

Haven't taken any pictures in it yet. Every time I wore it, I was with different people.

[B]

Yeah, same.

[A]

Like, I could wear it again.

[B]

Me. You know what? Maybe I'll wear to tonight. Ben's birthday dinner with his family.

[A]

That would have been a good thing to wear to your fancy lunch.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

All that to say, I personally, I kind of love lunch better than dinner. Like, I love going out to lunch better than going out to dinner. I like lunch menu items better than dinner menu items.

[B]

Okay, that's really, really interesting. I. I don't know if I like dinner more than I like lunch. Are you Talking about also, what day of the week is it? You know, hypothetically weekday. Oh, weekday. No, my weekdays, like, especially with like my new health journey where I'm really trying to figure out. I'm on weight watchers, trying to figure out like how to stay healthy and. But also full. My weekdays revolve around my dinner. Like when Ben is done working and we make dinner, like it's the highlight of my day.

[A]

Well, like the restaurant you're going today to, I would rather go there for lunch than for dinner is what I'm saying. Like, I love like lunch fair and I love lunch lighting.

[B]

I also feel like people like, I don't know if this is just like a me thing. I always feel like, yeah, I can have like a bigger lunch cuz like by the end of the day it like won't even count, you know?

[A]

Yeah, but I'm not even going to have a big lunch. Like, I want a light salad, a couple apps, a tuna tartar, maybe like one like that's just what I like, you know, I don't eat steak, I don't eat meat. Like, Right. So the dinner options, what I'm gonna have pasta. Like, it's just heavier and there's less for Y girl.

[B]

I feel that.

[A]

And your girl has been left behind. Y girl.

[B]

I like it, but I like Y girl. So having said that, I do feel like we should get into it. We have a lot to do today.

[A]

And you have to make it to said lunch.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Keep talking about it.

[B]

Totally.

[A]

So without further ado to do, here are the fast side stories that you need to know.

[B]

Today's episode of Toastery, which is so fabulous by the way I hope you're enjoying, is brought to you by Clean Simple Eats Protein. We have found our newest protein powder obsession and it's Clean Simple Eats. We love them because their protein powder is always grass fed. It has no seed oils, no artificial ingredients. It's also third party tested. It's non GMO. It's gluten free. Each serving has 20 grams of protein. So their protein powder is really creamy. It's really smooth. We like to use it in a smoothie, bake it into a recipe. We've been on a protein journey lately. Clean Simple Eats is really integral to that journey. It's the most delicious way to get enough protein every single day, which we know is super important to staying full, staying on our fitness journeys. They have so many different flavors to choose from. They even have protein powder variety packs. You can try individual servings of multiple flavors which I recommend if this is your first time using Clean Simple Eats because then you can find your favorite flavor. In addition to their best selling protein powders, Clean Simple Eats also has clear protein powder. Clear protein powder is all the hype right now and Clean Simple Eats has the best one out there. The pink burst flavor is life changing. It tastes like a melted pink starburst and Clean Simple Eats can't keep it in stock because it is so so popular. It's also delicious so you just mix the clear protein bag with water. You get super refreshing and light drink with 20 grams of protein. So visit CleanSipole eats.com, use our code Toast20 at checkout for 20% off your first order plus free shipping. That's CleanSimpleites.com Our code is Toast20 T O A S T20 for 20 off your first order plus free shipping. The link is also in our show notes. So enjoy. Thank you Clean Simple Eats for sponsoring today's episode and enjoy the rest of this hilarious episode. Love ya. Bye.

[A]

Thank you Claudia.

[B]

You're welcome.

[A]

Our first story, Brittany Cartwright describes the breaking point fight with Jax that led to separation. So Brittany Cartwright has revealed the moment she reached her breaking point with Jax that prompted her to separate from him after five years of marriage. She was on Watch what Happens Live on Tuesday and she said, we just had a horrible fight and was like a veil was lifted and I noticed everything wrong. They always say a woman can hit her breaking point and it's hard to come back from that. I feel that she said that the fight served as a catalyst for their separation involving a night during which she had gone out with Kristen Doty. She said he kind of made up a story in his own head and started a fight over something that never happened. We thought about everything. She added, calling their marriage a very toxic situation from which she needed to remove herself.

[B]

Well, okay, well, that's like I feel the first time she's really directly sort of explained what happened. And I don't know if since I heard that they were separated, if I believed it, even though I had been told by people that I know that like that it's for sure for real. But the way they're acting is just like a little thirsty. But they are out here promoting this new show like, and they're the best.

[A]

And they're like, they're trying to make it titillating.

[B]

So I was catching up on Vanderpump Rules last night and it was the scene where Jax comes, which I kind of loved by the way it was giving very much. Sheena walking from Brandi Glanville into Sir. So Sandoval was like, you know, you haven't stopped talking shit about me. And then they cut to a clip from Jax's podcast. I had totally forgotten that the production company from Vanderpump Rules had reached out to us asking if they could license our episode with Jax and that they needed to reference it in the storyline.

[A]

Sandoval, the entire time.

[B]

We couldn't have signed the thing faster. We were like, yeah, of course. And my heartbeat. I was like, oh, my God, this is it. But it wasn't. And I feel like maybe they just decided not to use it because if there was ever a moment that it was.

[A]

Yeah, no, that was it. Watched it and I had the same thought, but I'm pretty sure I watched it after it aired and I'm like, oh, it must not be here because everyone would have been sending it to us.

[B]

So I was two weeks behind and I was like, oh, wait, no, definitely not. Because everyone would have told us.

[A]

I don't think they're using it at all.

[B]

That's too bad.

[A]

That would have been really a value add for the show, like, for their show.

[B]

And that was such a great episode.

[A]

The girl, like, would have loved to see it. It just would have been so.

[B]

It would have been good for the whole community.

[A]

Yeah. Missed opportunity. Are you all caught up on bpr?

[B]

I didn't watch last night, but I caught up for the. On the first two. And honestly, like, I was bored to tears. Like, I guess the big reveal. No, no, I was already caught up on that. The big reveal of, like, Katie, Max, like, who gives a fuck? I didn't even know. I know Max because he was, you know, on for one season, then got fired. But. But I didn't know him and Tom Schwartz were even, like, that close of friends. Like, I don't care.

[A]

Yeah, well, it was.

[B]

That, to me, the most interesting thing. Also don't care. Also, like, Lala, like, and I love her. And I honestly, I find the whole. The most interesting part of this whole show is her and Katie's relationship. She, like, really. She said a few years ago. It was 12 years ago. And honestly, I feel like Lala did Sheena dirty in that moment.

[A]

Honestly, I think so too. But I think in that moment, she had a really good friendship with Sheena and a pretty good friendship with Katie that she was trying to maintain, salvage. And it's like, if you want to be a good friend to Katie, yeah, you do. Go take it to Katie before you go and talk to Sheena about it. But I think if that were to have happened even today, they obviously are in a fight, her and Katie. But I feel like in that moment she was. Didn't know, like, where her best friendships were going and she was just trying to, like, be a good friend, which is the right thing. Friend thing to do. But, like, Sheena's your closer friend. You need to be more protective of Sheena.

[B]

Let me ask you another question. And by the way, we'll talk about Dancing with the Stars because it's so funny. Do you feel like Shayna was actually mad at Brock for bringing up the Max thing or she was just being, like, coy?

[A]

No, she was mad at Brock. What?

[B]

Like, oh, we didn't want to make.

[A]

This a storyline, but, like, no, I think she was mad, like, because I think she also.

[B]

You think they would have had a conversation about that, like, in private?

[A]

I think it happened the night before. It's something that they both noticed. I don't think they expected either of them to say, but Brock saw an opportunity to, like, give Schwartz a talking point because, like, he's just getting, like, railed on and it's like, actually, Katie's not perfect either. I think Sheena did not want it to come up then in that way. So uncontrolled. Like, and if ever. Because I think Sheena also at this point, like, wants Katie and her friends to work.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. I.

[A]

No, she seems, like, seriously mad. Big mad.

[B]

But I do. By the way, I think Katie's, like, justified in wanting to Max. Like, I. I don't think she owes Tom anything. Especially, like she said, like, last year, while we were still being separated, I asked Tom not to fuck anyone in the group and he starts dating Raquel. Like, I thought her explanation was totally justified. She's obviously vindictive and, like, honestly, she has every right to be. But there was something else that I found to be so bizarre.

[A]

The dog.

[B]

By the way, does anybody else, like, kind of ship Lala Schwartz?

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

Oh, yeah. Okay.

[A]

I don't think they would ever work. And I'm pretty sure she said, like, she would. Could eat him for breakfast, which she wouldn't. She could. But, like, there's something really sweet about their relationship. And crazier things have happened on this show. Like, they keep cycling through. Like, I wouldn't be the most surprised if that was, like, the next iteration and kind of. I'm kind of obsessed. Even though I maintain that Schwartz and Joe need to get married, have children. And live happily ever after. They're perfect for one another.

[B]

Oh, by the way, like, I think Joe is weird and whatever, but, like, I actually felt really bad for her when Sheena, like, didn't stop with the braids and the hair, like, in the cap. You're a hairdresser. Like, shut up. Like, who cares?

[A]

Yeah, and it just comes off, like, really nasty whenever it's everyone against one and they're talking about her in front of her. And I'm sure, like, Joe has done them dirty in over the years. It's just not a good look. Like, oh, the snoring and the talking, like, it's just. Just don't. Don't talk about her then if you don't like her.

[B]

Tom Sandoval going up to Ariana, like, about the house, and I want to talk about the house, but, like, my butthole was, like, clenched shut. Like, it was one of the most uncomfortable moments of my entire life. And honestly, doing that takes such balls. Like, only a truly crazy narcissist, like, would have no self awareness and, like, be able to do that. And I loved every minute of it. What is going on with the house?

[A]

Like, no, it's insane the way that they're living, like, with the person they hate most in this world. They can't even go to a party together, yet every single night they sleep under the same roof, just the two of them.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

In last night's episode, like, they got into another crazy heated thing. Like, Tom left. Like, Ariana was just, like, raging, raging, eviscerating him. Like, there's nothing he can say. He leaves and it's like. And she's gonna leave and every, like. And they're just gonna be together, the two of them.

[B]

And I feel like a lot of the fandom feels like Lala's commentary about, like, brand deals and stuff is her being jealous. And maybe there's an element of jealousy from some of the girls because it's, like, kind of crazy that, you know, Ariana, who really, for the most part, up until recently, that gave nothing to the show and, like, wasn't, you know, bleeding out. Like, other people going through stuff is now, like, hosting Love island and getting all these opportunities where it's like, Lala's been through stuff. I can under. I actually can understand the jealousy. I really can.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But I don't think it's coming from a place of jealousy. It's coming from a place of facts. Why? And by the way, she's like, with all the brand deals, Ariana can afford an apartment. Cut to one month ago. What did we just report? Ariana bought a house, a million dollar house. Like she back whatever this was filmed, she was able to afford a house as well. Like, I, I'm confused, of course.

[A]

And Sheena said last night, I feel like they're always talking about like the brand deals, like she's fine, she's, you know, doing well. But Sheena then was saying last night, like in one of her commentaries, like, the Tom cheating on Ariana was the best thing that ever happened to her. First of all, like released her from this horrible, horrible person. Horrible person, horrible relationship. Like so unhappy and miserable.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

It made her into like a national hero. As opposed to them just like breaking up and no one caring and like having to move on with your life. You get all like, you're winning. Like, and Lala said that she was like, you've won. Like, look at him, look at his life. Like you're on top.

[B]

So true. No, and, and I think that maybe the resentment and the anger that she still holds is, you know, like she loved this person. Like, I get it, I get it. But like taking an outside perspective, you're right. Like Ariana went, or whoever said a Chino, like Ariana went from being like a low level cast member on a show that was dying. Like for real, this show I wasn't even sure if I was gonna watch that season. Like a really, like a dead show to not only being on the biggest reality show of all time, but being the biggest person on that show and getting opportunities on Broadway. Just buying your own million dollar house. Dancing with the Stars, Love island, every brand deal you could ever imagine. Like, her anger towards Tom is bringing her down because it's making her like kind of a misery.

[A]

It is. And everyone's saying it and it's so true. She needs to like release it. Not for him so that he can comfortable around.

[B]

No, for her.

[A]

Like it's, it's palpable and it's not a way to live. Especially in a new relationship. You have this much anger towards your ex. Like, how can you even enjoy what you have?

[B]

And that's, I feel like what Lala was saying, I think maybe a lot of like her anger and just like misery comes stems from her relationship with Katie who's also holding on to all of this anger. And I have to say I feel like Tom Schwartz's relationship with Tom Sandoval was a huge factor in, in Schwartz and Katie's divorce. But to blame entirely Sandoval for that divorce is unfair. Like, it takes two people in a marriage to break it up. Not the husband's friend.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I think Schwartz, the way he disregarded his wife for people like Sandoval is a huge part of it. But to. And I feel like Katie really blames Sandoval for the demise of her marriage. And I don't think that's fair.

[A]

No. But I think it's easy to. He's a very hateful person.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I think that Ariana and Katie are very united in their hatred and just like, being haters at the moment.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

What's crazy is, like, years ago when the Toms, like, when they were married to the Toms, they actually, like, didn't like each other. They like each other. And then they slowly, like, got on the same page. And then they had to be like, the wives of Tom for Tom.

[B]

Tom.

[A]

They were always together. And then they saw, like, their husband being stupid. So that, like, united them further. And then they were like, oh, you're doing a restaurant, we'll do something about her. And now it's just funny. Like, it's.

[B]

They're thick as thieves through, like, the strangest of circumstances.

[A]

Yeah. And wouldn't have ordinarily been the best of friends.

[B]

Something about her. Like, I loved Lala being like, we've literally tried these sandwiches. A year ago. I. They obviously had the sandwich tasting just to keep the. The restaurant a storyline on the show for, like, publicity. Where is the restaurant? Honestly, they kind of look like clowns for how much they clowned on Tom and Tom and. And say what you want. That place is open.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I just want to say Jax has a bar that he literally got open in six months. Like, and he's always posting on Instagram that he's there. And, like, it's a full fledged facility.

[A]

Yeah. And the thing about something about her that they kept saying is, like, you know, it's going to be smaller and we're going to be more responsible with everything.

[B]

Right.

[A]

And where is it?

[B]

And I didn't even realize. I only realized when I was watching last night that it's in the opening credits.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And it looks great.

[A]

And I'm starting to feel like if there were a reason to hold up a license, you know, like, city bureaucracy that were holding it up, like, they would tell everyone that they'd be like, you guys were so excited. But this, that. And this is happening. The fact that there's no communication about what's holding it up, like, I think bodes badly.

[B]

Very poorly. And I forgot who said It. But Lisa was right. Like, they got a lease. They've been paying rent on sun or West Hollywood Boulevard, whatever. That street, like, one of the most exciting, expensive. And yeah, it's small, but it's a storefront store level. Like, it's expensive. You've now been paying rent for over a year without making a dollar. And they sold a little merch, actually, so that was something. But, like, what in the world is going on?

[A]

Yeah. And then the other thing was the thing with the dog. And it also becomes, like, a bigger storyline in this episode. Like, because she called Ariana, like, calls him, like, an attempted dog murderer.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

And when she said, like, he tried, like, that they're her children and that, like, this person, like, when she was talking to Lala, she was like, those are my children. And, like, this person, like, tried, like, didn't care if my children died. It's like, if that's how you feel, why'd you leave them alone in the house with a sociopath?

[B]

Well, that's one point. But also when she was saying, I feel like that whole situation where Tom put the dog in Ariana's room and there was food on the nightstand. Well, that's just. First of all, Ariana needs to clean up her room.

[A]

I mean, Lala says in this episode, like, didn't you get a trash bag sponsorship? Like, throw it away.

[B]

Throw it away. I have to say, it seems like a really, really unfortunate series of events. Not a manslaughter. Like, I just was like, honestly, whatever was going on in the house, sometimes you need to put a dog in a room. And this is Ariana's dog. And putting Ariana and Ariana's in the master suite, putting the dog in Ariana's room, I didn't think was, like, a crazy thing to do. Should he have known to go look around for food? Honestly, no. Either. This is not a kitchen, It's a room. Like, it was just. It felt like something really unfortunate, not something malicious.

[A]

Oh, I agree.

[B]

But this is just. I feel like this is Ariana's anger manifesting, and if she just sort of, like, released it for herself, like, she wouldn't. Because, honestly, this was. You always want to blame something when someone, like, something like this happens. Like, I remember when Theo had cancer, we're like, who can we blame? Yeah, who could we blame?

[A]

And imagine if the person you hated most in this world was partially responsible. Like, easy.

[B]

Yeah, of course. But, like, in reality, that's really not the case.

[A]

No. And again, like, all of these things, things that she's like angry about or holding on to, like, and this negativity in her life would just be gone if she would just leave the house until you guys sort it out. And the way that they're living with the boxes and.

[B]

Oh, and Anne and Ann. So Ariana asked Anne for recommendations for assistance and Anne wants to be put in the running. And we do know that in real life Anne does work for Ariana.

[A]

Oh, we do.

[B]

Oh yeah, I knew that. Did you not?

[A]

No, in. Because in this episode she's interviewing Anne in the kitchen. Tom Sandoval comes out of the gym. He's standing on the landing, the staircase landing, and he's hearing them and saying how she like wants to work for such an amazing girl boss. And of course, oh my God.

[B]

And would want to work for a girl boss.

[A]

And then Tom Sandoval is like, then has a conversation with Anne, like saying like, I think we just need a couple days off. Doesn't even fire her anything. And Ariana goes and tells the group like this, you know, attempted murderer, dog murderer is eavesdropping on my conversations. It's like, well, you live in the same house and you are having a.

[B]

Conversation out in the, with his, with his employee.

[A]

Employee. Like, I'm sorry, it's absurd.

[B]

No. And oh my God. Wait, that's like really crazy. Yeah, no, she. And I was surprised. In the episodes that I watched, there were two events that she went to that he was at.

[A]

Yeah, well, she has to if she wants to stay on the show. And it's not fair for her to be pushed out of the show when she didn't commit this act of adultery. So I'm with her, like, yeah, I have to go. And then she gets mad at her friends who invite him and, and put her in this situation. And I get that on a human level, but on this is your job working. We're making a show here level. Something's got to give.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

I don't know. It's. I don't know how it even could because say she releases the anger and she moves out of the house. I still never want to see her speak to this person again.

[B]

And you have to work with her.

[A]

How do we go forward with the show?

[B]

Yeah, well, also the more I watch, the more I really believe the rumor about the reunion where Lala and Ariana just have like a knockdown, drag out fight. Because Lala's coming at this from I think of similar place as we are, which is just like a little bit more at a glance you know, and a little bit more sympathetic to everyone, including Ariana. But Ariana's not the only victim here. You know, like, and everybody makes fun of Sheena but like I actually really. The Dancing with the Star singing, I didn't understand but I did understand like her being sad about her friendship with Sandoval being ruined. But Ariana is right about the fact that Sandoval is definitely using Sheena as like his gateway to filming and events and Tahoe. Because the more people who can tolerate him, they don't have to love him. But the more people who Schwartz is tolerating him, Sheena will tolerate him, the more stable he is in his job on the show.

[A]

Yeah, James will tolerate him.

[B]

Ariana's right. And the Kushina is sort of like the weakest. Like she's so sweet. Like she's not a mean spirited person. She's. Yeah, a little self centered but like she loves hard, you know?

[A]

Yeah, no, I, I agree with that. It must be incredibly frustrating and I just, these are, this is like not normal circumstances. Usually when you exit a relationship you then just move on with your life. You don't have to then film a reality show together.

[B]

But. So if Ariana like really wanted zero personal ties, like she would have to leave the show and watch. She shouldn't. No. But Sandoval is not leaving. So we need to now we're in the place in the show where we need a resolution.

[A]

I think that's how everyone feels and I keep like putting them. It's frustrating now every episode they're trying to put them in the same room and get there. And like last night it was so bad. Like it was, oh, I can't wait a barrage.

[B]

Love.

[A]

It was, oh my God, like seriously uncomfortable. Like seriously.

[B]

I just like wish Ariana had this energy when she was dating Sandoval because somebody desperately needed to put him in his place. He acted worse with Ariana than he does without. Now he's kind of on this apology. Honestly, nothing he's doing is bothering me. Before he was a monster with Stassi. Remember in that book event? He was horrible and she just kind of sat there and like let him act that way.

[A]

No. And I said this a few weeks ago, but I keep thinking about it. A few weeks ago I accidentally watched an episode from last season and I watched a few minutes before I realized I was watching the wrong episode because it was Katie and Ariana in something about her talking about how Lala told Ariana that Sandoval didn't leave the Barbecue when he had a ride. And he lied about that when she was dealing with her dog and her grandma and he stayed there with Raquel. And Ariana was saying to Katie, like, I don't want to hear these things. Like. Like. Like she was mad at Lala for even telling her.

[B]

Like, no, no. She was so unreasonable. And she was kind of the woat when she was, like, up Sandoval's ass. Like, never told him. That's what a good partner does. Like, you tell your partner in private, like, when they're being wrong and encourage them to, like, do whatever. She was just, like, awful and, like, not enabled, but just did nothing. And so now it's like, yeah, you know what we've been knowing. And it's, like, frustrating because now we're over it.

[A]

Like, and now he's been handed his.

[B]

Justice beyond, like, I. I feel fine.

[A]

He's been punished. I don't think a person who's cheated has ever been punished in such a way.

[B]

No, but he was punished for, like, that. But also in my mind, for, like, the years and years of atrocious behavior.

[A]

Agreed. Like, he was knocked down 1,000 pegs.

[B]

Yeah. No, he's like, the biggest weenie. I don't even know how, like, anybody could look at him and honestly not feel sorry for him.

[A]

He has his weenie parties.

[B]

Oh, wait, I'm so glad you brought that up. That pool party with Billy Lee and her friend and then those two girls.

[A]

From Instagram, like, and he's, like, telling them the story. Is there any way anyone in Los Angeles doesn't know who Tom and Ariana are and what happened between them?

[B]

Not even that. Like, not to be so mean, but, like, the whole. It was giving. Like, where did you find these freaks? Like, it was just. It was a circus. Like, I didn't even know who these people were. Like, and everyone was just, like, acting crazy and, like, taking shots. And I was like, okay, stop. Like, stop.

[A]

Also, he was flirting.

[B]

Oh, I was in pain.

[A]

It's really painful. Like, when you think about, like, his, like, romantic aspect of his life, it's like he's heartbroken over Raquel, who he loves. And, like, she is disappeared. And.

[B]

No.

[A]

And he's trying to flirt in the.

[B]

Pool and he's saying, like, yeah, I'm murdering my ex girlfriend in the bedroom upstairs. I crushed potato chips and put them under the door.

[A]

Claudia.

[B]

Painful.

[A]

Seriously painful.

[B]

Okay, well, Jackson, Brittany are still. And by the way, I've heard the Valley is very good. I'm not gonna watch it.

[A]

Like, Half of the first episode, I got the gist and I feel like.

[B]

You would like it. It's like people who are in like, your stage of life.

[A]

I know I didn't love like any of the characters yet.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, besides Jax, Brittany. Brittany and Kristen. Like, I'm really not interested in meeting new people.

[A]

But it was. I need to go back to it and remind myself why I didn't finish watching it. Because there was a reason. Because I do, like, yeah, I love, like seeing new mamas like, you know, got baby here. Give her. Like, I love, like, that's so interesting to me. And they were new cast members who looked like interesting people with, like, things going on. The just the dialogue was giving cringe and it was like, we're excited to be on a reality show. And it was giving like, old school reality show where we're just like saying stuff because, hey, we're on the reality show and I'm excited.

[B]

I know it's giving like charity in.

[A]

Dallas and I'm wanting it to work out.

[B]

I feel like they were talking like that.

[A]

Yeah, that was really the issue. But they have to find their feet and I can't, you know, it's hard. Not every show can be vanderpump rules. Like, no. Are you ready for our next story? Which is one of my favorite stories.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Unintentional comedian Kelly Ripa is being hysterical today because they aired a rerun of her show today because I guess there wasn't a new episode and no one like double checked what the episode was. And in the episode, it's from June 2023, she is like begging for an invitation to be on Diddy's yacht.

[B]

Oh, I didn't know what you were going to say. Like, if they reran the one after like 9 11. I literally didn't know what you were going to say. No.

[A]

So Kelly and Mark are on vacation. This week they've been re airing old interviews from life with Kerry and Kelly and Mark. But it seemed someone wasn't paying attention when they picked out the videotapes because on Tuesday they aired an episode from June 23rd in cracking fawningly begged for an invitation on Sean Diddy combs his yacht. Meanwhile, his homes were raided last week as part of what appears to be a sex trafficking investigation.

[B]

Oops, wait. I also think it's kind of crazy, like, by the way, Kelly and Mark like, take a vacation for sure that they rerun episodes. It's a topical show. She does like, kind of what we do at the top of the show talking about what's going on in the world. News, pop culture, celebrities, like, light stuff. And then there's like a guest interview. But it's like, not the type of show you can re. Air. We've never re. Aired an episode of the Toast. Like, that's weird.

[A]

Especially not from a year and a half ago. Like maybe air from last week.

[B]

Week. Yeah. Yeah. That's like really, like bad programming. Like Care less.

[A]

What else should they do, though, if they are taking the week off? Guest co host.

[B]

Well, yeah.

[A]

Hard to program too, if you don't have one person who's used to doing it. That would be like if we took off and two people just sat in our chairs.

[B]

No, but like, if we had. Not us. Like, if she had Ryan come for a week.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And Ryan had different co hosts. Or Michael. If she didn't leave it so bad with Michael Strahan. Like, if you had like, friends of. And I feel like Jerry o' Connell comes on all the time to like, replace Mark or someone. Someone comes on as like when Mark is sick or when Kelly's sick. I think they had one of their kids. Like, they have friends of the show who could come in with different co hosts. Like, I don't know. I feel like they should be trying harder for their audience.

[A]

I think this is standard stuff. And we never would have even known if it wasn't just for this, which is so unfortunate.

[B]

I did not know that they reran topical, you know, shows. I don't feel like they ever reread an episode of Wendy with the. With her stories. That's so crazy. That's so lazy on behalf of cable. Like, do better.

[A]

Whoa. Not to hit him with the do better.

[B]

No, do better. Like, seriously, Jackie, if we took a vacation on our show was owned by abc, we would literally be like. And we had unlimited resources. We'd be like, let's get Stassi. And, you know, Taylor Strucker. Pay them.

[A]

Like, yeah, yeah.

[B]

And that being said, abc, we are available for purchase, merger and acquisition. I'm down. If you could. Okay, great question. If you could have any media company, whether it be a streamer, a network, whatever, purchase the toast and like, be the. Like, we get to still do the show every day, but then we have access to whatever, you know, like.

[A]

Like, probably NBC is the most.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But you know, Disney, abc, Hulu. I'm down.

[B]

Like, if we could have our show live on something. Like, we are exclusive, let's say to YouTube or we are on the YouTube homepage every day. We're on the Netflix. Where would you want to be? Like any network streamer or social media platform. Like if we're the official daily morning show of.

[A]

I know people would like think we're gonna say Bravo or E, but that's not thinking.

[B]

No. And every show on E flops like.

[A]

Oh, it's just small potatoes. Like I want to be worldwide, nationwide.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Where's everyone right now?

[B]

Now, honestly, everyone's at Max right now. Max is having a moment. Every streamer has like a different.

[A]

It would be Max and Easter.

[B]

I would. And by the way, the show would be like the morning Max. Like Max Anistas. Yeah, I, I, I think Max. That's almost what I was gonna say. But also I wouldn't mind being a part of like an Apple or a Roku or prime because then they put you on everyone's devices.

[A]

Yeah, devices. No, that's good. Obviously I would take a Netflix. Ever heard of it?

[B]

Of course, of course.

[A]

Netflix.

[B]

And they are getting into live programming.

[A]

X does a lot of live, like long form videos. You don't want to be there.

[B]

No one really watches it. It's just like, I don't know, I think we'd have, we wouldn't have an engaged community on X. I don't think that's true.

[A]

But I think you want like a piece of that, you know, Hollywood glitz and glass for sure. Hollywood, yeah. What about Tick Tock? Is there set up for that?

[B]

No, no, but we would reach the kids, which would be nice because they need to be spoken to.

[A]

They do. But like, is it our job?

[B]

No, it's not. And I also feel like just part of being a kid, it's just like being radical, you know?

[A]

That's true.

[B]

Like you, like I always worry about Gen Z. Like I see these stats, like they're so anti semitic, like they're insane. But sometimes I just want to chalk it up to them being young. Young and dumb. Like that's like Woodstock, you know, all those 16 year olds were taking dumps in, out in the, out in the open and like doing Molly and acid. And then a few years later, like they all got jobs and most of them came back down to earth.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So I feel like, I don't know. Yeah, I like to think like these young, crazy, really dumb kids are just radicalized and they'll, they'll come back down to earth.

[A]

But I feel like to a degree, yes. Like when you are young you don't, you think you know everything and you don't. That's a classic trope. But are we getting to a place where it's, like, more than just the classic trope? Like, it's giving.

[B]

It's definitely a lot more youth. Ah, it's a lot. It's a lot.

[A]

Yeah. It feels more than usual, but I hope I like your interpretation of things.

[B]

Yeah. And just an idea.

[A]

Any further thoughts?

[B]

I mean, I did, but, like, I don't want to get into it.

[A]

I feel that I'm exhausted.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

Are you ready for our next story? Like, exciting news on a number of levels.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Nicole Richie and Joel Madden's look like kids. Harlow and Sparrow make their red carpet debut at the premiere of Don't Tell mom the Babysitter's Dead last night in Los Angeles.

[B]

So you're, like, worse.

[A]

I had to do a little digging. What is this? They've remade the movie. Nicole Richie is playing Rose. I'm right on top of that rose.

[B]

Right on top of that rose. Oh, wait. So who's playing Christina Applegate?

[A]

Who's playing Christina Applegate is Simone Joy Jones.

[B]

I don't know who that is. Hold on. What a great movie. That movie, like, raised us. And I'm right on top of that rose.

[A]

The poster for the movie, the tagline. Let me know when you're ready for it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Respect your elders.

[B]

You're liable. Wait, I also want to see what Nicole Richie's kids. I feel like she doesn't really show.

[A]

They look like Nicole Richie and her husband.

[B]

Really? I mean, I would hope so.

[A]

It's crazy when that happens, but it's really cute. They're literally.

[B]

Oh, man. The girl is gorgeous.

[A]

They're mini Me.

[B]

The girl is gorgeous, and the guy is literally like a. In Simple Plan.

[A]

No, like, if they ever wanted to make a movie about their life and, like, their. Well, I guess it would be brother and sister playing. Never mind.

[B]

I take back what I said. I can't. Oh, and Lionel went to the premiere.

[A]

So did premiere love.

[B]

Oh, how did Sophia look?

[A]

I don't think she swears.

[B]

Oh, I'm obsessed. I love. Nicole Richie is one of my absolute favorite celebrities on the planet.

[A]

Yeah, no, I know. And so this is very exciting. Like, we love the movie. Don't tell mom the Babysitter's dead. And I'm so glad they're remaking it for the younger set. But, like, if you haven't seen it, I think you should watch the original first. Yeah, you should.

[B]

Not to sound like such a grandma. It's Christina Applegate. Who else is in that movie? Who's the mom? Let me see. Give me a second. I'm obsessed here. 1991. Sue Ellen. I'm obsessed. Sue Ellen is Christina Applegate's character's name. And who else is in this movie? Nobody I know.

[A]

Let me see.

[B]

John. Yeah. You don't know anyone. Oh, David Duchovny. He's literally in everything. But that's really it.

[A]

It's so good. I'm so excited. I wonder where we could watch it.

[B]

I think I just. When I was looking at the background. It's BET.

[A]

Exciting. Only in theaters April 12th.

[B]

Oh, and it's in theaters. But the. The backdrop said bet.

[A]

Yeah. BTS Original films in product in Tyra Banks's production company, Smize Productions, our executive producer.

[B]

You're lying that it's called Smize Production. She's so iconic.

[A]

So iconic. This is just tens across the board.

[B]

Agreed. That's exciting. I loved that movie.

[A]

Yeah. Our next story. Lizzo is breaking her silence to clarify that she's only quitting negative energy moving forward. So Lizzo said she quit last week. People were like, she quit. And so some people were like, no, I think she's just like a figure of speech that she's, like, done with this. And that's exactly what it was. So she shared a lengthy statement on Instagram and a video saying, I want to make this video because I just need to clarify, when I say I quit, I mean I quit getting. Giving any negative energy attention. What I'm not going to quit is the joy of my life, which is making music, which is connecting with people, because I know I'm not alone. In no way, shape, or form am I the only person who is experiencing that negative voice, voice that seems to be louder than the positive. And then if I can just give one inspiration, blah, blah, blah.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, of course. Of course I believe her, that she didn't mean she was quitting music and that she's just like, I quit. I get it. But for somebody who's like, quitting negative and toxicity, like, she keeps making content about it. Like, I seriously, like, she needs to take a break. Like, she's just in. She was really, really famous for a really long time. And like, as always, like, ability is a prison and yada yada. And then she was accused of some pretty heinous things. So, people, we just need a break from you. And she doesn't go away. Like, she keeps posting and she's trying to, like, elicit sympathy, I think, and it's just not working. So just, I feel like it's always good for celebrities to take a break.

[A]

But she, like, won't, or she's taking a break. I feel like she might be just, like, scaling back, but not gone. Because I think it would also be, like, kind of an admission of guilt to go. And she's maintaining her innocence that these people, like, she said in the last statement, Pissy, are saying things about her. So I think she kind of needs to, like, stay making content while also, like, staying positive. And I don't think it's going so well yet, but I think maybe, like, starting today, it's gonna be good.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I think that I quit Threw everyone through a loop. Not me, though.

[B]

Not yet.

[A]

Not me. I knew she was quitting. Negative energy and haters. I just knew it. Yeah, it's like a child. I quit.

[B]

I had just seen the news headlines before I saw her statement. So everybody said, lizzo quits music. I'm like, okay, Lizzo's quitting music.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. No, you got to go to the primary Source Club. This is what they teach us. You have a history major. I learned, like, that's what I've got out of my education.

[B]

And that's what we were talking about yesterday.

[A]

Reading comprehension and also reading between the lines harder, but important harder. But she did say I quit. She did, but there was more there there.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Are you ready for our fifth and final story? Our fifth and final story was some news that was quiet, that I think they'll be mad that were blowing up. But JLo quietly rebranded her tour as a greatest hit show amid weak ticket sales. After canceling seven dates of her first North American tour in five years in weak ticket sales, JLo has renamed it to apparently broaden its scope, changing it from the this is me now to this is Me Live, the Greatest hits.

[B]

So I don't know if prior to this, she was planning on playing the greatest hits or if this was going to be a new album tour.

[A]

It's giving it. It was gonna be, and now it's not.

[B]

Or maybe it was gonna be and they didn't put in the title and they thought people wouldn't know. I can't imagine JLo would go on tour and not spend at least half the show playing her greatest hits.

[A]

Yeah, I think she would have played a lot of hits. I think she also would have been marketing the new album. I think now there will be more hits and less album still album. We're still gonna this is Me now, but, like, generally majority hits.

[B]

Like, I really feel this is a very good step. I've been following, you know, the rise and fall of JLO over the last couple of months very, very closely. I think it's one of the most interesting things. I just don't know why I find it so intriguing. And I happen to think this is a brilliant next step. And it gives me hope that whatever direction her career is going to go next is more to this icon level. I don't know why she's still doing the same thing that Ariana Grande is doing. You know, who has way less experience in her. JLo's been around forever. Like, she should not be doing the same sort of prototype as like, you know, releasing an album, press tour, arena tour, like the same cycle, like the One Direction cycle. Like, what are you doing? You're not in the same strategy. Get off the rock differently, get off the roller coaster. Like you are different and you're very much, I feel like in the Celine Dion realm, which is an equally good realm to be in now. You don't have to go to Vegas and do like a boring residency, but you do have to act different. And so the fact that they're not branding this as great as hits does give me hope that they're seeing her career, whoever's running her. But I feel like it's actually her. But whether it's her management, they're seeing her now as in this different category. Not retirement, but icon. That's a better.

[A]

Yeah, that works for me. All of a sudden this concert sounds good. Like we're gonna hear the JLO hits.

[B]

Right? And JLO is known for being such a performer. The fact that her performances were not selling well, when I think that's probably her biggest strength, as in talent, strength and, and allure.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Is very concerning. So I would like, if I may, I wouldn't buy a ticket, but if somebody said, want to see JLo, here's a ticket, I'd say, honestly. Yeah, I know most of the songs. If it's the greatest hits tour and she's a fabulous performer, the dancing, the singing, everything razzle dazzle, the hair, the clothes, like she knows how to perform. Yeah.

[A]

This is sort of like a, an issue with con, like touring albums. It's like I want to hear like general things, like what if it's not my favorite album and I didn't get to see you on the last album tour, but I'm seeing that's why the Eras tour is really great. It's like it doesn't matter what I missed.

[B]

It's also very, very artist dependent because, like, I think of. Because the next concert I'm going to see is Morgan Wallen. And I didn't go last time, but he did a big, big, like, I had my chance. He did a big ass tour for his last album and his last album was enormously popular. This time, after doing like the most with the previous album, he's now doing the most again with the new album. And you know what? I feel like that's fair, but it just depends on the artist. Like, if your most recent album was a flop, but you have like tons and tons of hits, like, do both for sure.

[A]

But I just think of like Luke Combs, like, I absolutely need to hear this album live. And if I don't make it on this tour, like, I will have missed my chance. And yeah, the next tour, like, he'll play some of this, but I need this album.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So I guess I'm going to Jacksonville.

[B]

Jackson Turdy in Jacksonville. I'm down.

[A]

Jackson Turnyville. Yeah, no, like, that's I guess what I need to do because his tour just. He said he's like, he really didn't consider me, honestly, and it's rude.

[B]

But by the way, back to what you were saying, it's completely artist dependent and album dependent.

[A]

Yeah, but you feel that way about tailored before eras. Like, you didn't get to see the Red tour and like, how badly you want to see the Red tour. It's just a necessary evil. Like, it just is what it is. But.

[B]

But maybe eras tour is like really shaking up the industry. Like, people are seeing, like, oh, oh, you know, like, maybe I can do this. Like, yeah.

[A]

But I also think maybe some people don't want to work that hard. It's a lot of work, what she's doing.

[B]

By the way, do you think they.

[A]

Even remember all the lyrics to all their old songs?

[B]

That's like, some artists talk about how they don't. Joe Jonas talks very openly that even recent songs, like, he cannot remember the lyrics. And I know Miley a lot of times has a teleprompter.

[A]

You actually, you know lyrics and memorize them really well. But you, I could see you being the sort of person like, if you were a pop star, like, yeah, no, I wrote my song, but I don't remember the lyrics. Okay, sue me.

[B]

Okay. When I was in Saint Barts, we got back to the house and like, we were drunk and we were like making snacks and somebody put on music and 100 came on and like, I literally didn't know the words to the second verse. But I was also really I feel.

[A]

Like that's a part of the era. Sort like the whole thing is so impressive, but that's, like, on the list of impressive things that I don't think she gets enough credit for.

[B]

For.

[A]

And her lyrics are so intricate, and just like, especially I'm Going Down.

[B]

Don't disgrace that song.

[A]

It's the best song ever.

[B]

Also, by the way, it's even more impressive when you think about the fact that she'll literally go on the acoustic set and play a song from 17 years ago. That's the most deep cut that she's probably never even played live. She probably released it and never played it again. Cold as you.

[A]

I think she has such a good memory, and that's probably why she has a hard time letting things go because, like, they're so seared into her memory, you know what?

[B]

What the Lord giveth, the Lord taketh away. It's a blessing and a curse.

[A]

Yeah. Like, she remembers it like, yes. Yesterday, because her memory is so strong. That reminds me of Dana.

[B]

Yeah. And I also think she's a person of high intellect, and I think memory has, like. Is a part of that, you know? Even though they say people with bad memories are high intellect. But maybe that was just, like, something they told you. Me searching for a headline that related to me.

[A]

Yeah. No, it's giving Dana. Dana would be a great pop star because she'd remember all of her lyrics.

[B]

But she'd also be a bad pop.

[A]

Star for 45, 000, 1000 million reasons.

[B]

Mostly that she can't say.

[A]

She can't sing. She dances like. Like she's playing charades.

[B]

Yeah. We bought a house. Like, you know, I'm. Yeah. I'm yelling, timber. You better move. You better dance. That's so funny. That's funny.

[A]

Yeah. And she would admit it. Like, it's a point of pride for her.

[B]

Yeah. Oh, well, what's so fabulous is that the stories were great. Really, Jackie. 10 out of 10. I enjoyed them, so thank you.

[A]

But I really think we made the most out of them. It was us doing what we do best.

[B]

And what we do best is really help people. I think that's fair to say. And Wednesdays are extremely helpful day here at the Toast, because this is dear. Shut up.

[A]

Today it's only okay when you do it.

[B]

Yeah. Today's Dear Toasters day, our weekly advice segment where you girlies will write in and we'll do our absolute best to help you. We got three submissions every week. You can submit dear [e-mail]. write us an email. Or if you want to be super, super anonymous, head to the Toast podcast dot com. Scroll down. There's a little submission box. No name required. Nothing. Today we have an update and two submissions. The first update is from the girl who wrote in about taking her husband's last name when her husband's last name was Duty. And we understood. You know, we. And by the way, we had gotten a lot of feedback from that episode because we had said to each other, we gave her advice, but then we were also like, what kind of last name is that? Like, I've never heard that. And a lot of people wrote in, like, it's really a popular name in the south. Like, it's a thing. We didn't know about it, but we had encouraged her to speak her mind, maybe do some sort of hyphen, some, you know, new name, like Ellis Island.

[A]

Like Caitlin and Dean. Ellis Island.

[B]

Wait, what did you say?

[A]

Dean. Oh, Kaylin And Kaylin Miller Keys married Dean Unglert, and they both changed their last names to Belle, which is K. Lyn's mother's maiden name, because that's what they all do most and wanted to.

[B]

I thought you said Kayla, and you just reminded me. We had spoken at length on April Fools. Like, we were so curious if anyone was gonna, you know, make the April Fool's joke. I'm pregnant. Because it's something people do every year and they always get canceled for it and people never learn. This year was no different. Thank you to everyone who sent me on TikTok. You know, Travis, Kelsey's ex girlfriend, Kayla, Nicole, who's, like, an influencer, and she's, like, always in the news for, like, shading Taylor.

[A]

She's pregnant. I love. I love that she was the one. I couldn't have picked a better person.

[B]

I agree.

[A]

I love that for her. Like, I think it's so great. And. God, seriously, like. And. Yeah, just.

[B]

Okay. Our first year toasters is from that no Duty update. I was the girl who's getting married to the P job whose last name is Duty. I honestly wanted to create a completely new name, a combination of both. Alas, everyone in my fiance's fiance's family wears the Duty moniker with such pride that they were actually a bit hurt when they found out my true feelings. After realizing how much it meant, I have conceded to using the name personally. So Christmas cards, meeting new people socially, but professionally and legal purposes, I am keeping my own name. Xox.

[A]

Mrs. Duty, I just want to say.

[B]

That'S big of you.

[A]

I went through A Like, a emotional roller coaster reading this. Like, of course, at first we have to circumvent duty, but then you say, like, this family is a proud family and, like, to go. And you, like, took your, like, second grade humor to them. You're like, it's duty. Like, I feel embarrassed and like, of course you.

[B]

I don't.

[A]

Duty. And I also feel like, nothing. Like, if you own something, like, there's nothing cooler than that. Like, if you just. Like, that's true. If you are so confident and, like, I could forget the meaning of the word. So by the end of this, I was like, I. I could see I could be rooting for Mrs. Doody. I, like, in general, like, you have your family name, and then you have your professional name. So that works for me. Yeah. But I do think. I don't remember what our advice was then, but my advice now would be to kind of reframe it in your head and, like, to find the joy and the duty.

[B]

I just want to say I do feel like the family could have been a little bit more understanding. Like, it is a piece of poop. Like, you're not being a child. Like, words have meaning, and so for them to just be straight up offended and not being like, yeah, no, when I married. And I also felt like if somebody could commiserate a little bit, that beep.

[A]

Be real to the family, but also her, like, be mature.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

No, no.

[B]

I actually think this is a very, very mature way for you to move forward. Honestly, I don't know if I could ever be that mature. Because, like, duty is duty. And also, I'm a duty person we talk about all the time. The thing is, not everybody uses the word duty to describe poop. A lot of families have their own words. Like, duty is our family's word. Like, I have to make a duty. There was duty on the floor. Romeo made a duty. Like, duty is our word of choice. It means a lot to us.

[A]

Yeah. But for other people, it's like, oh, yeah, that is a meaning of that. You know, hopefully that's what it is for you. But I just. The best advice you could give. Own it. Just own it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Wear with pride.

[B]

Okay, Our next one is so crazy. Hello. My husband and I just got married this past September. I was talking to him randomly this week about how we should look at cemetery plots together, and he said that he already has one when. That his mom got for him when he was 15. Mind you, it's in his hometown, which is the town we went to college in and where we met, we do not live there anymore and I would really rather not be buried there. I said, well, if I die first, I can be cremated and just placed in your plot. And he went on to say how he doesn't believe in cremation. I said, well, we just have to be buried next to each other then. Please help a girl figure out on how to get on the same page with my husband about where and how we're buried.

[A]

Okay. I don't know what like the textbook, like healthy and right time to talk about this is. I've not even thought about it. And the few times that I have thought about it, like, it is confounding. Yeah, it's confounding because it's like one of the husband or wife like isn't going to be buried with their parents because you'll be buried with your in laws and then your kids might not be with you because they're with their. I don't like it. I, I don't know what the answer is.

[B]

I don't like it either. It's wrong. Like, but I find peace in my religion, which is really puts very little emphasis on the physical body, they really say. And I remember at a funeral hearing this from the rabbi and it actually weirdly brought me great comfort that like this is a shell. The person is not there. They Jewish afterlife spends a lot of emphasis on your neshama, which is your soul and your soul is with you. Like, so I don't, I really try to hang on to that because if you think a lot about, you're right. Maybe my kids won't be with me and maybe I won't be with my family. Maybe I'll be with Ben's or Ben won't be with his. Like it's bullshit. So I really, I try not to think about it and I try to really lean on my faith.

[A]

Honestly. No. And I think it like sounds weird and feels weird like to the living, but then like to the dead it's irrelevant. And think about how often we like never even visit.

[B]

I know. We've literally visited our dad twice.

[A]

And it's only like when we're in the neighborhood, which is never. So yeah, I, I, it helps to not be attached to that as an idea, but it is, it's really weird. And I don't know, like, what is Emily Post like etiquette for when you talk about it? And what do most people do? Like, is there. Oh, we are, we always go with the mom's family or the dads.

[B]

Like, I I don't know why I happen to think you always go with.

[A]

The wife, but I also think it has to do. Well, yes, people buy their plots in advance, but it kind of has to do with, like, where you die, where.

[B]

You live and where you live.

[A]

But, like, you might, like, retire somewhere different from where you were spending your whole life.

[B]

Right. That's why, like, a lot of our grandparents who are from New York are buried in Florida because that's where everyone goes.

[A]

Church. So it's. I have no advice for you. And it's something I've put. I'm thinking about. I don't even. Like, it's not like I actively put it off. I've just, like, I don't even worry about.

[B]

Thing is, I don't. I want to say, like, I don't care. I have to imagine that, like, God forbid, you know, in a million years, when I die, the people around me who know and love me will advocate for the best place for me to go, given, you know, where others are. Wait, stop. Them that are gonna cry. Are we not gonna be buried together?

[A]

That's what I'm saying.

[B]

Because, like, you're gonna be with your family. That's what.

[A]

We should do this. Like, we should.

[B]

We should buy a family, like, right.

[A]

Now and like, kind of take. Get it taken, get it over with.

[B]

Also, like, who knows what our financial circumstances are going to be in the future. Like, when you feel. I guess that's why people have the conversations. Like, if you have the money at this point, buy it now so you save your family the trouble later.

[A]

It just feels like, like a lot of sturm and drang and like, drama and term for a dead body for something that's like, not. Hopefully, God willing, like, just not important right now. And that's why I really could argue.

[B]

Right when I go to a cemetery and I see the people with the huge mausoleums that you could literally walk into, it's like, to me, that's a waste of money. Like, I guess maybe it's faith based.

[A]

I was gonna say different religions, like, have a different idea of it, so I'm not gonna yuck anyone's yums, but I like that ours, like, de emphasizes it because it's. It's giving willy nilly.

[B]

And also, I like that you don't have to go visit to feel connected to that person because in Judaism, that person's always with you.

[A]

Yeah. But, like, thanks for bringing this up. Yeah.

[B]

We have no advice. Sound off in the comments if anybody has any help.

[A]

Miserable conversation and it, like, makes me sad that, like, this is the conversations you're having with your new husband.

[B]

Like, right, Less than a year.

[A]

Stop having these conversations. My tip is to, like, seriously drop it.

[B]

I agree.

[A]

If the chips fall where they may.

[B]

And just if being cremated is, like, really, really important to you, like, make.

[A]

A will important to him, I thought.

[B]

No, he doesn't want. He doesn't believe it.

[A]

Just drop it. Seriously.

[B]

No, but also, like, if you die first and you want to be cremated and your husband doesn't believe in it and he won't do it, if you have a will, he legally has to. So put it.

[A]

Yeah. And then.

[B]

And you know, every woman should have a will.

[A]

Every person.

[B]

Every woman.

[A]

Just stop talking about this. Seriously. It's harmful to your relationship.

[B]

Okay. Our third and final is very topical, and it's, like, really unfortunate.

[A]

It's.

[B]

It's an April Fool's joke gone really wrong. My sister and I are long time toasters. We love you swirlies. We decided to pull an April Fool's joke on my boyfriend, and it completely backfired. We've been dating for six months. We're in a happy relationship. We talk about the future and getting married, and I'm really certain that he's my person. He was at the gym, and we had told him that we were next door at Whole Foods grocery shopping. As we pulled in, I saw his car and we thought it would be funny, given it being April Fool's Day, to pull a little joke. We wrote and left him a note on his windshield saying, hey, I think you're really cute. I see you at the gym all the time. Text me. And we gave a fake text number from the Text plus app. He did it. He said, hey, I believe you left the note on my car. Very confident, Much respect. I was shocked. And I called him about an hour later after seeing him respond to the app. I didn't respond in the app, and I kept and keep the conversation going because the point of the joke wasn't supposed to be to try to catch him. When confronting him about the text response, he got defensive, saying he didn't think what he said was wrong and got pissed off because he thought we were setting him up for a test. Thoughts? Do I have a right to be upset? Does he have a right to be upset? You sound seriously like a battered woman. You absolutely have to break up with this man. He didn't even know what the person looked like, and he sent them a text like, he could have been a man.

[A]

Like, no, that's I want to say. But it's also, like, in. See?

[B]

And the fact that you're. Oh, for sure. But wait. The fact that you're writing in being like. Does he have a right to be upset? Are you okay? Break up with him. He will cheat on you. He probably has.

[A]

But, like.

[B]

Bad prank. But you know what? Bad prank. God's looking out for you. Like, you might not have never noticed because you seem to be under his spell.

[A]

Yeah. But some.

[B]

This man's a horrible boyfriend.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Break up with him now. Now this last thought. Do I have a right to be upset? Does he have a right to be upset? Are you okay? Like, I'm really worried about you. To answer your question. Does he have a right to be upset? No. Do you have a right to be upset? Yeah. You should break up with him.

[A]

My goodness, this is such a weird story. Like, I seriously, like, I'm uncomfortable, and I just like. And of course, like, he obviously failed the test. And it's actually a good lesson. Like, you ever need to test your man to see if he's loyal. If you feel like he goes to the gym and, like, creeps on girls. Yeah, do this.

[B]

But this girl wasn't even coming.

[A]

I know. Which it's like. And it is good to know, like, if he is a scoundrel. Like, it's good that you know now. But seriously, like, what are you do. It's entrapment. Like, what did you.

[B]

No.

[A]

It's a crazy, crazy thing to do, especially to your boyfriend of, like, six months who still might be in this phase of, like, seeing what else is like, of keeping an eye open. Like, I'm not committed.

[B]

No.

[A]

Yeah, I think that, like, if they're a. Six months isn't, like, the most serious relationship. Your newly boyfriend.

[B]

Girlfriend. Yeah, but if you can't. If you can't even stay monogamous at six months, like, if he's still keeping his options open, then he's not serious about you.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And you say you're serious. You wrote in the email, we're talking about the future. We talk about getting married. We are serious. That's what she wrote.

[A]

Yeah, exactly. Did this happen? And Zach, like, yeah, I would have totally broken up with him, but at six months of dating, we were very serious.

[B]

That's what she said, too. Get rid of him. And I want an update. Seriously, don't. Do not run away from me. That's our show again. If you want to write in, that's dear toasters, gmail.com or head to the toast podcast.com thank you so much for listening to the toast of Millennial Morning show where we deliver the Fast5 stories you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube. So if you're watching us on YouTube, please don't forget to subscribe and give us a video thumbs up. We're also available as podcast and where podcasts we found so it's Spotify, Tune Stitcher, Public Radio, Radio Cast Box, all the places web listen podcast. Find us at Toastle. Fast, beautiful sounding and wickedly talented we are. Hope you guys have an amazing day and we'll see you tomorrow. Love ya. Bye.