“I CAN C*M USING ONLY MY MIND”

Summary

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Therapy Gecko – “I CAN C*M USING ONLY MY MIND”

Date: January 21, 2026
Host: Lyle (Therapy Gecko)
Podcast: iHeartPodcasts

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Episode Overview

In this candid, often hilarious episode of Therapy Gecko, Lyle welcomes callers to share their personal stories and strange psychological conundrums. The episode’s headline conversation centers around Rika, a listener from Tokyo, who describes her rare ability to orgasm solely using her mind—without any physical stimulation. The discussion explores sexuality, cultural differences between Japan and the US, expat experiences, assertiveness, and the interplay between Japan’s famously reserved social culture and its often "zany" sexual subcultures. The episode also delves into community dynamics with another caller, Zoe, who’s struggling with complex family-and-caretaking arrangements.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Rika’s Unique Sexual Experience (02:14 – 25:55)

• Rika's Introduction

  • Rika calls in from Tokyo, introduces herself as a longtime listener, originally from Taiwan but raised in Japan (02:14–04:01).
  • Shares that she saw Lyle’s live show in Shibuya but was too shy to say hello.

• Mental Orgasms and Sexual Preference

  • Rika reveals she can orgasm just by thinking, without any physical touch, usually while watching (Asian) porn (04:30–05:53).
  • "I can just watch porn and to reach out that kind of feeling... I don't need anything or touching myself to make myself feel orgasm." – Rika (04:30)
  • Lyle is intrigued: "You're telling me that you can come using just your brain, but you don't have to touch yourself at all. You can just be watching porn and you can come." (05:21)
  • Rika prefers the experience over actual sex with partners of any gender, saying real sex rarely matches the intensity or satisfaction (07:41–08:41).

• Feelings of Alienation

  • Rika wonders out loud whether this makes her "weird" or possibly addicted to porn, but Lyle validates her experiences.
    • “I don't think there's anything inherently wrong with you…I mean, there's just like a lot of people who prefer porn and masturbating to…sex.” – Lyle (09:10)

• Sexual Dissatisfaction with Partners

  • Rika admits to faking orgasms during sex out of politeness (10:36–11:00), and finds the process more effort than it's worth.

• Dating in Tokyo, Cultural Preferences, and Identity

  • Rika, who was born in Japan to Taiwanese parents, typically dates foreigners, especially those who speak English, due to feeling more direct and expressive herself (11:10–13:38).
  • Shares struggle fitting in within Japan—a direct, assertive personality in a reserved culture.
    • “People give me two kind of different kind of answers. One is like, I really like it; once, they scare.” – Rika (15:07)
  • Discusses her challenges making friends due to cultural norms and language barriers.

• Bar Hopping & Rejection

  • Rika recounts boldly approaching a man in an American military bar and being rebuffed, but Lyle encourages her to “keep shooting your shot.” (18:47–19:56)
    • "Listen, listen. You got to shoot your shot. You got to shoot your shot." – Lyle (19:49)

• Humor on Dying by Masturbation

  • Rika jokes, "I probably just fuck myself to death," prompting Lyle to riff on the poetic drama of this (20:39–20:59).

• Clarifying Self-Pleasure Process

  • Lyle’s curiosity leads to further detail: Rika compares her mental process to a “yoga vibration,” saying her brain alone triggers the sensations (21:10–22:20).
    • “My brain gave me that kind of like a feeling or whatever. Not even the chat GP or my doctor know what's going on with Me?” – Rika (22:20)

• Consulting Her Doctor & The Tree Metaphor

  • Rika tells Lyle she once told her doctor, who advised her simply to do what makes her happy (23:12).
  • Jokes about finding a “handsome tree” to have sex with, leading to a playful, surreal exchange about the sexual allure of trees (23:34–24:24).
    • “You have no idea how many times I want to [have sex with] a tree, bro.” – Rika (24:01)

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2. Exploring Japanese Sexual Subcultures (35:01–44:49)

• Japan’s “Bipolar” Sexual Culture

  • Lyle notes Japan’s reputation for both conservatism and “crazy” sexual subcultures, while Rika contends the society is "very bipolar" on such issues (35:18–37:10).
    • “Japan is like a very bipolar. Either it's really…nothing or there's something going on on the ground. So…it's true. It's beyond hentai, actually.” – Rika (36:51)

• Happening Bars and Group Sex

  • Rika describes visiting a “happening bar” (a Japanese swinger/sex club), explaining the layout, open sexual activity in group rooms, and her impressions (37:33–39:49).
    • “You just have to witness yourself.” – Rika (39:19)
  • Lyle inquires about the gender ratio and the kinds of events; Rika describes themed nights ("naked party or gamband or like hentai party"). (41:53–41:58)

• Introducing FetLife & Shibari

  • Rika explains Japan's use of FetLife for kink/sex communities and describes Shibari rope bondage demonstrations, which anyone can attend for a small fee (42:26–43:23).
    • “You just pay like a 2000, 3000 and join the whole process. The event. And they will just show you how they tie the girl. Kind of cool, actually.” – Rika (43:01)

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3. Daily Life as a Foreigner in Japan (26:00–54:01)

• Bar Scene & Meeting Foreigners
  • Rika details trying various Tokyo bars, noting that socializing can be lonely and that foreigner communities congregate in specific areas. (26:00–26:21)
• Work and Japanese Dollar Stores
  • Rika works at Daiso, Japan’s famous dollar store; Lyle riffs on "thing Japan" memes contrasting Japanese and American convenience (28:51–30:50).
• Sensei Martian: A Community Connection
  • Rika knows “Sensei Martian,” a streamer friend of Lyle’s, and shares the story of their meeting, highlighting the strong expat/foreigner scene in Tokyo (31:04–34:33).
• Convenience Stores, Food, and Nostalgia
  • The conversation shifts to Japanese food, convenience stores (Lawson, 7-Eleven, Family Mart), and the appeal for visitors versus the experience of living long-term (47:59–48:38).
    • "Egg Japan beats egg every time." – Lyle (56:22)

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4. Cultural Identity, Directness, and Assertiveness

• Directness in Japanese and Taiwanese Culture
  • Rika describes herself as “too direct” and potentially “autistic” for Japan or Taiwan, which she notes makes friendships and dating more difficult (15:33–16:06).
• Goodbyes & Listener Wisdom
  • As the call ends, Rika offers humble, universal advice:
    • “Don’t do fentanyl, OK? Let me tell everyone say about that. Don't do fentanyl and don't do drugs too much and don't drink too much alcohol... And if you—no one—you just try to f**k yourself. That's it.” – Rika (55:08, 55:25)

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5. Zoe and the “Bonus Child”: Family Friction (58:52–75:56)

Note: Skip over introductions and unrelated ads.

• Complicated Extended Family Life
  • Zoe calls in about drama involving her "bonus child" (stepdaughter), who stays with relatives due to space constraints.
  • A dispute arises when a cousin’s fiancée complains about the child’s bedwetting (59:10–66:42).
  • Lyle attempts to untangle the family connections ("Have you ever seen the SpongeBob meme...so this is your wallet?") and tries to triangulate the most diplomatic solution.
• Community Approach and Advice
  • Lyle suggests that, living as part of an extended "village," some mutual caretaking responsibility is normal, but recognizes Zoe’s frustration at being unfairly judged (67:44–74:52).
    • “You sound like you care about the people in your life... You’ve intentionally taken on giving a shit about people outside of yourself and even outside of your blood. I think that inherently makes you a nice person.” – Lyle (74:56)
• Resolution
  • The conversation ends without explosive drama but underscores the challenge of maintaining peace in big, intertwined families.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “You’re telling me that you can come using just your brain, but you don’t have to touch yourself at all?”
  Lyle (05:21)
• "I probably just fuck myself to death."
  Rika (20:39), leading into one of the episode’s funniest, surreal exchanges.
• "No one, you just try to fk yourself. That's it."**
  Rika (55:25), as humorous, offhand closing advice.
• "Japan is like a very bipolar. Either it's really…nothing or there's something going on on the ground. So…it's beyond hentai, actually."
  Rika (36:51)
• "Egg Japan beats egg every time."
  Lyle (56:22), on how even simple foods seem better in Japan.
• “You got to shoot your shot. I think you sound…You got to keep shooting your shot.”
  Lyle (19:54)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

| Time | Segment Description | |-----------|--------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 02:14 | Rika’s call begins; expat and self-intro | | 04:30 | Rika explains her mind-only orgasms | | 07:41 | Rika compares satisfaction from masturbation vs. sex | | 10:36 | Faking orgasms out of politeness | | 13:10 | Cultural difference and identity crisis in Japan | | 20:39 | "Fuck myself to death" bit | | 35:01 | Cultural contradiction: conservative Japan vs. sexual subcultures | | 37:33 | Happening bars and group sex explained | | 42:26 | FetLife, Shibari, kink events in Japan | | 47:59 | Japanese convenience stores, culture shock, and nostalgia | | 58:52 | Zoe’s call about "bonus child" and complicated living arrangements | | 62:21 | Lyle tries to untangle the family tree | | 67:44 | Lyle summarizes the “village” approach to family/caretaking | | 74:56 | Lyle reaffirms Zoe’s kindness in dealing with extended family challenges | | 55:08,25 | Rika’s closing advice on life and self-pleasure |

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Tone & Style

The episode is freewheeling, witty, and empathetic. Lyle leans into absurdism and humor while treating each caller’s vulnerability with genuine curiosity and nonjudgmental support. Banter regularly veers into NSFW territory but with warmth and openness, inviting listeners into the bizarre corners of everyday intimacy, culture clash, and family drama.

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Summary Takeaways

Therapy Gecko’s January 21, 2026 episode is a wild, enlightening ride from Tokyo’s “mental masturbation” mysteries to group sex clubs, expat alienation, and the gentle chaos of American extended families. The show exemplifies the power of humor, vulnerability, and curiosity as tools for navigating the absurdity of human experience, whether you’re masturbating with your mind or just trying to get along with your man’s cousin’s fiancée.

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Transcript

[Podcast Announcer]

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[Rika]

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[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

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[Zoe]

Z Studio for details hey Lyle.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Hi.

[Zoe]

Hey.

[Rika]

Hey. I've been calling for a while. I'm happy I finally made it.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

What is your name?

[Rika]

My name is Rika.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Nice to meet you Rika. You texted me and you said yeah. Hey Gekko. I'm Rika. I currently live in Tokyo, Japan. I've been calling for a while. Not sure how to reach you. Let me know. Yeah, thank you. And I don't know, I was just, I'm, I was just curious, you know, I, I, I don't know. I'm just curious. I'm just curious what's going on with Eureka? What's, how's your life going? What made you want to contact me?

[Rika]

You know, I was in your one, your show in Shibuya last year, and it was amazing. You want to tell that? But, But I was very, I was very introverted. I'm too shy to reach you out. And I just kind of, you know, backstage. I kind of, you know, just look at you.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

You. So, yeah, I did it.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

I love, I love these guys. I'll be back there at some point on my next trip to Japan, but the Tokyo.

[Rika]

Oh, really?

[Zoe]

That would be awesome.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Every, yeah. Every time I go. So wait, so you were. Okay, so you were at that show? Did we, did we talk?

[Rika]

I mean, I tried to talk to you, but you're so popular with people, so, like, okay, I just let you enjoy your time, you know, like, you're having a real good time there.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

I have. I love, I frigging love Japan. I love, I love Tokyo. If I, if I had, if I could live in. I will. I want to come back there. Like, I mean, I was living there for two months. I thought. I was living there for two months, like a year ago, and I thought, I thought I was going to move there.

[Zoe]

Oh, really?

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Yeah, I thought I was going to move there. Yeah.

[Rika]

Oh, man.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

But I love New York. If I, maybe I'll live in Tokyo again at some point. I'd really like to, but right now I'm enjoying New York. But. Well, okay, let me. I'm going to stop. I'm going to stop talking about myself for two seconds, and I'm going to ask you. It's okay. If not, it's okay if you just wanted to chat. I'm sure we have lots that we can chat about.

[Rika]

But no, there's actually, actually one thing about me. I want to talk about it. I want to make it short. I will make it. Please, too long. So I won't talk about a female masturbation, these kind of things, because I've been talking with a guy about jerking off, and they don't believe me that, like, I don't need anything or touching myself to make myself feel orgasm, because I can just watch porn and to reach out that kind of feeling. And I just feel like I'm a kind of weird kind type of person. So I just don't think like I will ever understanding that how female body works. And actually we can just entertain ourselves to feel satisfied with.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

You're telling me that you can come using just your brain, but you don't have to touch yourself at all. You can just be watching porn and you can come.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Just using your own brain.

[Rika]

Yeah. And just watching. I prefer Asian type of porn. So I just watch it and then find a genre I like it. And then I can finish done in under 10 minutes. Then after that I can do all the stuff.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay, so I have multiple questions if you're willing to answer them.

[Rika]

Sure.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

So like when you. Are you okay? So like are you. Are you applying any like pressure mentally? You know? Like are you like. Like. Okay in the sense of like. Okay. So like if. If. If I'm masturbating, I can like.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Choose how much force to put upon. Yeah. My genitals. And I can. And it's like, I guess like edging or whatever. Like I can. I can turn that force up and down like a faucet. Right. Are you doing that?

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

With your. Are you doing that with your brain or is it just like a. Like you put on the porn and it's like a steady, you know, walk to the finish line.

[Rika]

I'm kind of both, but I'm more like. I'm. I will say I'm very sexually hot. I'm highly sexual person, but with a man or with a woman. I'm bisexual, but I can't reach out that kind of climax with the people with a humankind. But I'm not sure I'm. I'm poor addiction or what. But if I watch porn or just watch a. Well, I don't know like a porn article or whatever, it will make me reach high climax and make me feel really good. And I'm not sure like what kind of condition or what. What the. What the is issue with me. But just like it's hard for me really have a real good sex with people because I cannot feel that interesting.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

So. Okay, so watch. Just watching porn alone. So just watching porn alone, not even touching yourself is a. Yeah, better.

[Rika]

I don't need sexual or anything.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay, so that's a better sexual experience for you than like being with an actual human being?

[Rika]

Yes. Yes.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Interesting. Well, you know what's funny is. I mean, I think like if I had to think of. If I were thinking about like The. I don't know, I feel like masturbating and like having sex. They're almost. They're like. They're a little apple and orange in a way. They're kind of two different experiences that give diff. They're. They're not like a 1:1 pleasure ratio, you know what I mean? Like, do you still. Do you still like take pleasure in having the sex in like its own unique. In its own way, like pleasure in a way that's kind of like unique to. To masturbation?

[Rika]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Zoe]

I'm not.

[Rika]

I'm dating or looking for any do right now because I feel like they. It just. I'm certified now or just I don't want to waste my time on people I don't like or just you know, having hookup, that kind of stuff. So pretty much it was like I'm just a watch choose whatever I like and just done 10 minutes or 20 minutes and no, I don't know what's wrong with me. Just that just something. I kind of. Kind of like it, I guess.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Well, I don't think there's anything. I don't think there's anything inherently wrong with you. I think there's a lot of. I don't think there's anything wrong. I mean it's definitely fascinating that you just like have trained yourself to cuz it's fuck as some. I feel like cuz there's some women where like they, they need a lot like you know, they got to build a fucking Pee Wee Herman breakfast machine to have a. Have an orgasm and for you to just like. Yeah, do it with your brain is very interesting. But I don't think there's anything wrong with you. I mean there's. There's just like a lot of people who prefer. Yeah, well, I guess like prefer porn and masturbating to like the, the ev. Well, let me ask you this. Is it just like. Because obvious obviously man or woman?

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

It's easier to just like sit at home and watch porn and masturbate than it is to like do the whole thing that is required to.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

You know.

[Rika]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I get. I. I mean I. I get what one man feels like. It's a kind of a lot of work. Why don't they just watch porn? I finish that and they can do other things. I, I get that and that's why I, I feel same too. I like having sex with a man or whatever. Is it just kind of too much work? Because I could have to pretend it, you know? Like, oh, my gosh. And that sucks.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Oh, you've. Oh, you've like, had to like, fake an orgasm?

[Rika]

Yeah, I mean, I feel it, but it's not like that kind of good or it's like A. Probably 1 or 2 second that kind of feeling, but it's not really reach out that kind of, you know, but you still have to, like, say thank you for that person, for put the effort on your body, you know, Otherwise it kind of sucks.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Mm. How did. So, like, what's the. What's the. Have you. Have you been to the US before or, like, lived there? Spent any time there?

[Rika]

No, I, I never, but I date a lot of foreigners.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Interesting. So what is. What is like the dating scene like, for you in Tokyo?

[Rika]

In Tokyo. So I'm, I. I'm not sure I'm. It's my preference or I'm just racist. I'm just. I don't like Asian that much. It's not because their penis or whatever. I don't find their looks is something like, you know, I, I find it really handsome or anything. So I prefer like a, Like a English people who speak English and they, they. I, I just find like a lot of common with, with you, with people, you know, American or European type of people, and, you know, somehow we just end up on the bed and something, but the sex is just not nothing that impressed me.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

What is it that you think you find more in common with foreigners than with Asian people?

[Rika]

Common. There's no common with foreigner. Asian people. I mean, Asian people, they are not really good. Express their feeling and themselves whenever they are dating. I think it just very confused me, and I don't like it because I'm very direct person. If I like you, I like you. If we, we connect, we have a good chemistry, then we can, you know, just go. Go the next step. I just prefer like that.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Yeah, I know. I get, I know that. I feel like I talked about to someone about this on this podcast, but there's. There's a word in Japanese or like a phrase of like. Like the two faces, like the one you show to the public.

[Rika]

Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's Japanese. That's like, actually from Taiwan. I've been living in Japan for a while.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Oh, I thought, I thought you were Japanese.

[Rika]

I mean, I was born in Japanese. Kind of complicated, but yeah, I'm, I'm.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Well, you were. You were born in Japan, though.

[Rika]

I was born in Osaka.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

That makes, that makes you Japanese, doesn't it?

[Rika]

No, because my parents choose my nationality still In Taiwan, so I'm not Japanese.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Oh, interesting. I guess. Do they have the same thing? Yeah. If you're born in America, you just automatically granted the citizenship?

[Rika]

Yeah, yeah. I'm. I'm not. I don't know much about America, but yeah, that's, you know, I'm up. Taiwan is kind of up now, so whatever, I guess.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Did you grow up until. Did you grow up in Taiwan or did you grow up in Japan?

[Zoe]

I.

[Rika]

After high school, I graduated and I decided to move to move back to Japan. I don't see my future much in Taiwan, so I studied college and work here. Still. No, I. Still in Japan.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Do you. I mean, the. The whole thing of, like. But the whole thing of like, I guess being like, generally, like, being reserved or trying to like. Like you say you're a very direct person. Like, do you feel like in, like, Taiwanese culture too, that, like, that's like, discouraged?

[Zoe]

I don't know.

[Rika]

Or just my personality is kind of like, very forward and kind of strong? That kind of like mommy type of dummy type of. That kind of feeling to people? Most. Hopefully they just say, I'm. I'm too much too strong. The power is like, whatever is it. I mean, like, I don't know. People. People give me two kind of different kind of answers. One is like, I really like it once they scare.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Well, you know what? I. The people. I think that there's probably a strong overlap between those two groups.

[Rika]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Interesting.

[Rika]

I don't know.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Interesting. Have you. Have you always. So have you always been like that? Have you always been kind of like a more direct, assertive person, or is that something that you developed?

[Zoe]

Yeah, I'm.

[Rika]

I'm very. I think I'm way too direct or maybe I'm just autistic. I don't know, man. It just like this, and I offended and it's hard for me to be friend or make friends here because my, you know, Japan, people in Japan, they are very conservative. They don't. They. They have to think. Some think before they say. But I don't have that process. I just say it and I might. Might hurt someone or might, you know, being like, being Will be in trouble. Why Raises. So it's hard for me to make friends here.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Mm. Mm. Yeah. No, I. I know that it's a very. I know it's a very reserved culture, for sure.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Yeah. Like, you know, I have. I've. I've, like, friends in Japan who are Japanese who talk about. Talk about all that.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Do you go to a lot of, like, I know there's a lot of like, there's a huge like Foreigner community there. Do you like, you know, kind of like.

[Rika]

Yeah, I, I do.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

And.

[Rika]

Yeah, I was actually was. I was doing bar humping, hopping like yesterday in Shinjuku. But yeah, there's nothing much going on. I was just at a, like a city record bar or something. And it's, it's funny, like, no one really talked to me or, or trying to give me a look or anything. So it's pretty sad here.

[Public Investing Ad Host]

You.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Honestly, you. You talking about going bar hopping in Shinjuku is making me want to be in Japan so badly right now.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

It'S f. It's. Dude, it's funny. Japan, like, like, I know it's like. I know it's like a meme. It's kind of like a meme at this point. Japan, like, like, like being a white guy, love in Japan. Like. But I mean, it makes, it makes sense because like, if you, if you're, if you just like come there from like the west and you like dick around like with all the cool shit, like, yeah, of course you're gonna have a good time. But if you like are born there and grow up there and like, deal with the, the like, everything, everything is nice there. Like, that's the thing is everything is like nicer there and cleaner there. But why. And then you're like, well, because of a general, generally more conservative culture, which is probably like more fun to. Which I assume is more fun to like visit than it is to like go to school or work in.

[Rika]

Yeah, it's. It's clean. But sometimes you just feel like too much. Like you just want to like a little bit mess a little bit on like a list and that is fine. But Japan is like, really. They need to be kind of OCD. They need to be 200, like, so I don't know.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

So people are not chatting you up in the bar. Nobody's. Nobody's bar hopping by yourself.

[Rika]

Yeah. Last night, let me tell you one last thing. Last night I was at Yokosukala as a military, American military bar there. And there's a guy, I really like it. He looked like a Harvey Davinson, that kind of bike rider, that kind of gang type of dude. And I found he's so hot. And I straight. I just walked straight to him. I said, hey, I like how you look like. And he, he kind of surprised or scared, I'm not sure. Like, I'm trying to read his mind. Then he just gave me a look and give me Say, oh, thank you. And then he just say, have a good day. And he laughed. I was like, wow, I'm sorry.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Wait, why would you be sorry? It's. He sounded. He seemed flattered.

[Rika]

I don't know. He just laugh. I mean, I feel like I just like he wants to be quiet, but maybe I just like shouldn't. She didn't just walk away and say, you looking good or whatever is it or. This guy doesn't like that anymore.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Listen, listen. You got to shoot your shot. You got to shoot your shot.

[Rika]

I did, baby.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

And you did.

[Rika]

I did Gaggle. I did.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

You got to shoot your shot. I think you sound. You got to keep shooting your shot. I mean, are you. You said that you don't want to date anymore. Are you like trying to find like. Like, like a. Like a. Like a real relationship?

[Rika]

I mean, I'm not. I. I'm not even dating app or anything because I just wasting my time. So basically I'm just like going out and just see the people. I think it's cool. Maybe go to a bar. It's more easy to talk to people. But it's hard, man. Just like I probably just fuck myself to death.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Wow yourself to death without even touching yourself. Sounds like a crazy way to die.

[Rika]

Well, I mean, that's a. That's a very, very poetic way to die. It's kind of like beautiful way to die.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Yeah, I think so too. Definitely.

[Rika]

Yeah. Yes. I mean, you don't want anyone fuck you up, so you just fuck yourself in another way, do you?

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Can I ask you. Okay, I just have one more question about the like masturbating mentally thing. Do you. Are you. Are you like. Are you like the X Men where you're like staring deeply into your vagina while you're doing it? Or are you like. Are your eyes closed and you're somewhere else? Like, where are you looking?

[Rika]

I. I'm just watching the video and my mind will just give me like. Do you know there's a kind of yoga will give you kind of vibration and your whole body will feel something that kind of stuff. Something like that, I think. But it's different because I'm not doing yoga. I'm just. My brain gave me that kind of like a feeling or whatever. Why is I call English? I don't know. And then your. Your. Your dumb part will. Will doing something for you. And then you will reach a really good high climax. I don't know to you because not even the chat GP or my daughter know what's going on with Me?

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Oh, you have a daughter?

[Rika]

I have a. I have a doctor. I have a therapy. And I told him about it and he don't understand what's going on too.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

What is your. How old is your daughter?

[Rika]

My. Oh, my daughter. My daughter. Not. Not my daughter.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Oh, oh, oh, okay. Okay. Your doc. Okay. Doctor and therapist. Okay. I thought you said your daughter.

[Rika]

Yeah, yeah. No, I mean, I don't think I'm capable for having kids anyway.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Well, you asked your doctor about. Is it. I don't know if this is. This. I don't know if this is a medical. This is kind of like when that kid on the playground would be like, look, I can pop my, like, thumb out of its socket. You know, it's. I don't know if it's like a medical issue or anything like that.

[Rika]

Yeah, he say he can't help with that. He just tell me, like, do whatever makes you happy. That's what he said. I was like, okay, then maybe I will just fuck a really handsome tree if I find one.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

You will? You'll do what.

[Rika]

I say if I. Maybe I would desperately just find a handsome tree and the tree then.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Oh, okay. You fuck a handsome tree.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Have you ever seen it, like. Okay. I thought you were talking about like a literal. I was. Good. I thought you were talking about like a literal tree.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Have you ever seen a tree. Have you ever seen two trees next to each other where you're like. You look at one.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Like. And you're like. And you're like, I'd that tree, but I wouldn't that tree.

[Rika]

Oh, man, you have no idea how many times I want to a tree, bro.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Why would you want. Why do you want to a tree?

[Rika]

I don't know. It's just so thick and strong. I like strong men and they're kind of muscular. Is remind me of just like, kind of. I don't know, just kind of connect with the tree. I have no idea why that makes perfect.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

No, it makes perfect sense. I like that. A tree is your. Is your. Hear me out.

[Rika]

Yeah, you know what? Gek. If someday you can find me, I might be in a forest fucking a tree.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

That's not a bad way to go. Either fucking yourself to death or either fucking yourself to death or escaping into the wilderness to have orgies with trees are not. Yeah, actually, I think before. Do me a favor. Before you fuck yourself to death, which I hope you don't do. I really hope you don't do.

[Zoe]

Okay.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

You should. Yeah. Consider having, like, having. Having tree orgies. Yeah, I get trees being hot. They, they're, they're providers. They provide nutrients for the rest of the, for like the animals. They provide us with the stable that I'm leaning on right now. Yeah, trees are hot. I'm with you.

[Rika]

Yeah. Yeah. You with me? Sex man.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

I might go out maybe. I, well I live in New York so I, I, there's no place, there's no place where I could a tree that I wouldn't get arrested but maybe.

[Rika]

I don't know about, you know, when.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

I'm back home I'll tree the what?

[Rika]

Yeah, I don't know. Five tree that you like and you know, a sick one and the sick the better.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

How often are you, how often are you, are you going out to these bars in Tokyo?

[Rika]

So lately I'm trying different type of different bar. There's a like a Vinnie style bar Record or the 70s City Pop Bar or type of music bar. I'm trying different one and like two times a week. Something like that.

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[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Do you, do you work?

[Rika]

I do, yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

What do you do?

[Rika]

I'm like, what's that called? English. So there. Do you know in Japan there's a like a dollar shop, it's called Dyson.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Yeah. Another Dyson.

[Rika]

Yeah, yeah, I work there.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Oh, cool.

[Rika]

Yeah, yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Everything, man. You know that, you know, it's so stupid. I'm, I'm so stupid. You know that meme that's like thing, thing Japan.

[Rika]

I'm not sure which meme, but there's a lot of meme.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

All right, so there's, there's. Okay, there's this meme and it's like a. Do you know what a wojack is?

[Rika]

Oh yeah, no word. Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay, it's like, all right, so it's like a wojack. And for those who don't know what, everyone listening to this knows what a wojack is, even if they don't know it's called wojack. So just Google wojack and you'll know what I'm talking about. So it's, it's, it's like, it's a wojack who's like, okay, so imagine a wojack and he's looking at the dollar store in America and he's like. And then the bottom is a wojack and he's doing that like, omg, that's so cool face. And it's the Dyson.

[Rika]

Oh yeah. What the hell, man?

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

It's like the same. It's like the. A fucking dollar here. It would be a dollar store. It's not that cool. But in Japan it's like a thing is like meh. But thing Japan is like, whoa, that's so crazy.

[Rika]

Wait, they do have a daisom in Hawaii though. They don't have in mainland America they have a.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

They have most. They have a lot of the Japanese shit in. In Hawaii. Like 711 is shitty here, but it's great in. In Japan and it's also great in Hawaii.

[Rika]

Yeah, You know what? Hey Geico.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Yo, what's up, dude?

[Rika]

If you ever come. You ever come back here. Actually I actually have check your Instagram sometimes if you ever come back here, we should hang out with. What's that called? Sensei. What's a Sensei Martian?

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Sensei Martian? Yeah, he's my. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he's my boy.

[Rika]

Yeah, he's your.

[Zoe]

He.

[Rika]

He's your boy. Last time I met him as well as your show, man.

[Zoe]

He's a good.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Oh yeah. Wait, how do you know? How do you. For reference. Sensei. Sensei. Sensei. I made a video where I walked across part of Japan.

[Rika]

Yeah. Yeah, that's a shit. That's a shit. Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

And I mean I made it with this. A friend of mine, Jace Sensei Martian. Friend of mine. Sensei Martian.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

How do you know him?

[Rika]

I. You know what? I know him earlier than you know this guy. I just found him randomly on the. On Instagram and I found.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Wait, you met him?

[Rika]

Cool.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

You met. You found out about Sensei Martian before you. Before you found out about me through Sensei Martian?

[Rika]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

That's awesome. That's so cool.

[Rika]

Yeah, he is cool dude. And I'm glad you found him because he's a cool dude, man.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

I was so for. Okay, so for the listeners, I'll tell a brief story. I was in Japan in like 2022 and I was live streaming like on the street. I was doing like an IRL stream. And in my chat this guy was. And then in my chat this guy was like, yo, I know where you. I know where that is that you are. I was like near some temple, I think Senso G or something like that. I was doing some like famous temple.

[Rika]

Yeah, you.

[Zoe]

You.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

I was in a saxa. Yeah, I was in a saxa and this guy Sensei Martian in my chat is like, yo, I know where you are. Stay right there. I'm going to. I'll come say what's up? And I was like, there's a guy in my chat who like lives in Tokyo. I was like, what the. And so everyone else in the chat is like, no. And so I was. I was like, okay, I'll wait for you. I was getting stream sniped by this guy. And then everyone else in the chat is like, no, Lyle, don't wait, because this guy's just trolling you. This is just a random dude, probably lives in Nebraska. He's just trolling you, making you wait there, think he's gonna meet you. And I said to all them, I was like, you know what? No, I believe in Sensei Martian. I think Sensei Martian is a real guy who lives in Japan who's gonna stream snipe us and come over and say what's up? And on my chat was like, no, Lyle, you're. You're an idiot. You're being fooled. And lo and behold, a man.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Comes comes up to me, and I'm like. And he's like, yo, Lyle, what's up? And I'm like, are you Sensei Martian? He's like, I'm Sensei Martian. And then he. And I walked and chatted on the livestream for, like, three hours or some shit like that. We became homies.

[Rika]

Holy shit. Yeah, that's what's up. That's what's up.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

And then this fucking guy, okay, so. So I met him because he stream snipes me, and then this guy messages me, like, a year later or something, and he's like, yo, I actually walk. Actually, like, he said something to me like, yo. Like, we talked a lot about, like. Like, I was trying to get into live streaming at the time, and since then, I have walked across all of Japan. This motherfucker literally, literally walked from the very top of Japan all the way to the very bottom.

[Rika]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

So that's the story of Sensei.

[Rika]

He's a cool dude.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

It is really crazy. That's crazy. You know me through him.

[Rika]

I know. Yeah. I know him before. You know him already.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

You are. You. When did you. How long have you been living in Tokyo for?

[Rika]

I'm. I'm living Japan for 16 years right now.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

16 years.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Angie Hicks]

Dude.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

You know what's crazy? And I don't know if you have thoughts about this, and I don't know if this is, like, an Asian culture thing or a Japan. I'm going to. No, I must say, this is like, a Japan thing. But it's weird to me because you're talking about, like, the. The, like, mental masturbation stuff. One thing that was always, like, kind of weird.

[Rika]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Is that. Is that Japan has, like. Supposedly this. Japan has this, like, very, like, conservative culture, but yet they also have this reputation for, like, zany, like, stuff and, like, like, crazy. Those crazy TV shows and, like, you know, crazy, like, sex.

[Rika]

They can be. They can be crazy and. And nasty. Yeah. They can be like.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Yeah. They're also known for, like, like crazy sex stuff. Like shibari, the rope tying and like, like, I've been to the crazy.

[Rika]

Oh, gags.

[Zoe]

Gag.

[Rika]

Do you want go gag? I know, I know people, you know.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

You know shabari people.

[Rika]

Yeah, I know, I know.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

All right, you might have to. All right, you might have. You might have. You might have to send me a DM after this.

[Rika]

I will, I will, I will.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

But is that. But I'm just. But I. You know, I'm curious, like, why do you think that? Why do you think that is of like, there's a thing where they are simultaneously there's this weird conservative thing that's like alongside this, like, very zany culture and all this like, kind of crazy sex stuff. Like, what is like. And that's like the JAV industry. And like, there's all like. There is a lot of like, like, what's up with that? What's up with that Contradiction.

[Rika]

Yeah. Japan is like a very bipolar. Either is really like, you know, nothing or there's something going on on the ground. So. Yes. I mean, if you know people, then, you know, like, this country is like. It's true. It's beyond hentai, actually.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Beyond hentai.

[Rika]

I got extremely weird. Yeah, it's beyond Hentai's real, like, because, I mean, kind of a special group of people and I know them and I see, man. And if I. I mean, do you know Happening bar, Jack?

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

I might know what I. I know, but I know what a happening bar is. Yeah. I've never been to one, but I know what it is.

[Rika]

Yeah. So I was. Because I was curious, so I was there. So it was very like.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

You went to the happening bar?

[Rika]

Yeah, actually. Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

What. What was it like?

[Rika]

So I was. I was there alone. Then somehow there's a. I, you know, there's a room for people just sit there, but there's another room for people to have a sexual activity. And you can just like look from the people like hall and look at them having sex. And you can join or not. And there will be some more and more people going on. And there are group of people getting banned while raises and you can hear like their. Their sound and wide raises going on actually just like 3D sex in front of you.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

So the. The hat, for those who don't know, the happening bar is basically it's like a swingers bar pretty much where like.

[Rika]

Yeah, English is called Swinger, I guess. Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Yeah, it's like a swingers bar. Pret. Yeah. Okay. So I heard that. I know that there's like a thing where you can, like, look through the window to see people having sex. Yeah, now. It's now, I think.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

I think. In what, Kabuk Cho.

[Rika]

In Shinjuku? Kabuki Joe. Yeah, mostly I got.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Yeah, that's where all the, like, Kabuk show is where all the, like, crazy stuff happens.

[Rika]

Yeah, yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

No one's safe there, I was gonna say. Yeah, I know. There's like, like. Okay, so I know. I know that. I think there's some happening bars that are, like, foreigners can go to, but they're mostly, like, only allowed if you're, like, Japanese. Right.

[Rika]

That's not really. Actually, there's a lot of, you know, whatever country people, you can come just bring your ID and you can just wherever you like them.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

So how. How would you rate your experience at the Happening bar?

[Rika]

I. I only been there once. I mean, I was too. To stay there longer because a lot of going on. I would say like a 7 out of 10, though.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Wait, 7 out of 10 is pretty good rating. Was it. Was it like. Like what? Like, was it.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Did it feel weird?

[Rika]

It feels definitely weird. It feel like a different dimension because everyone just. Just like eating any. Another person eating another ad and another person suck another dick, like, kind of things. Like, you know, would you just. It's hard for you to. To. To. To say. I mean, you just have to witness yourself.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay. Okay.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

I. I would be very fascinated to go. I was. I. I would be very fascinated to see what's going on in these happenings. Yes.

[Rika]

And you should. You should go with the Sensei Martian.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

I do not know if. I don't know if. I don't know if Sensei Marshall would come with me to a happening bar.

[Rika]

You should attack him.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Yeah, I don't know if he would come.

[Zoe]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Or just happen.

[Rika]

I mean, or just go yourself after that, make a podcast about that. My journey of.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

But, like, what?

[Rika]

You can't bring any, like, a video.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

But here's the thing. But here's the thing, though, is like. Like a single. I feel like a single dude rocking in alone is not gonna have the best time at a hanging bar. I'd have to imagine.

[Rika]

Well, well, get. You have no idea. There's some, like, a very interesting woman that will come come to talk to you. Maybe. I don't know. I see There's a lot of cougar, though.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Interesting. Interesting. Yeah, interesting. Okay.

[Rika]

Japanese meals, that kind of type. Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay. I'll. I'll. I'll I will certainly be. I will certainly write that down in my notes app as a thing that I might do with my life at some point next time I go to Japan.

[Rika]

Yeah, I mean, why not?

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Oh, what was the ratio like? Is it like mostly dudes?

[Rika]

No, no, there's a do and the girls like, not. There's not like a much girl must do or I don't know, some. Sometimes it depends on the event or. Because every day they have a type of different scene, like a naked party or gamband or like hentai party. That kind of stuff. Every day is different.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

You said that you are like, you know, this group of people or something that you've like seen them go beyond hentai. Who is this group? Yeah, this is like.

[Rika]

Yeah, you know. Yeah. Actually you might heard about this, this website called Fat Life. So fatlife has a lot of people doing like a kind of different stuff than the normal people do. So I just joined different kind of group in Japan. Then I just realized that that's really up and I kind of like it. So interesting to know what's going on. And they just show me while they look really doing it. And it's like a whole new world to me.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Whoa, what? And they're doing like shabari. Yeah, like what? Like, what does that look like?

[Rika]

Oh yeah, Shibari actually kind of cool. And they have a different type of. You just pay like a 2000, 3000 and join the. The whole process. The event. And they will just show you how they tie the girl. Kind of cool, actually.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

All right, you might have to send me a DM and tell me where.

[Rika]

Yeah, I will.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay. And so I can go. So I can go to them for research.

[Rika]

Yeah, sure. I was. I will send you immediately after this call on the.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

On the Therapy Gecko podcast. Wow. Yeah, it's interesting. No, I was.

[Rika]

Can I just send you on your Instagram?

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure. Wait, can I. Yeah.

[Rika]

Okay.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Wait, are you sending me a profile of someone or is this. Wait, is this like, can I. Can I live look at this? Or is this like a private thing that you're sending me?

[Rika]

Oh, you mean.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Wait, like this event?

[Rika]

I mean, this event. I mean, how. How can I say that? I mean, maybe you just need to join, be a, like to be a member of the website and you will be fine because there's like nothing, nothing too, too complicated. You just need to dial your email and stuff like that. And you don't have to be fully like a tell you what why into or your name. You can Be just whatever is a Cookie Monster or whatever. It's fine.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Interesting. Dude. It is so.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

It's so fat. I wanna. I gotta talk to like a historian or some. Because I. It. That dichotomy going on in Japan is genuinely just fascinating to me.

[Rika]

Oh yeah? Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Hmm. Yeah. Dude, I went to the. I went to this big like six story sex shop and they have like.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Have you. There's. There's a specific like famous one, I think in Akihabara.

[Rika]

Oh, I think I know which one.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Yeah, dude. And they have the. I don't. The jury's out on if this is real. I think it's not real. I think they're using. I think they're. I think that it's fake. But there's a vending machine where you can buy like period blood panties.

[Zoe]

Oh.

[Rika]

Oh, yeah, I heard that. I seen that though.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

But that's gotta. That's gotta be like fucking like panties with like red dye on it. Right? Like, there's no way they're. Really. How are they gonna source that?

[Zoe]

I don't know.

[Rika]

I mean, if it's real, that's up. If it's not real, that's still weird. I mean, what the.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Yeah, I don't. I. It is. It's. I don't know. That's got to be someone's thing. You know what? That's. I. My. My guess is that it's not real, but it's someone's thing. And so they're engaged in a suspension of disbelief. They're engaged in a suspension of disbelief where they buy it.

[Zoe]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Believing it could be real. Kind of like how. How people will like chat on Onlyfans with a lady and it's clearly not them. But again, the suspension of disbelief is Keep keeping the boner alive. And then they just like, you know, it's just for them to. It's. It's. It's a win all around. They get to pretend like they're smelling period blood panties and nobody has to volunteer their period blood.

[Rika]

There's a website in Japan. There's a website in Japan. People buying underwear and you know, on the. It's all like a high school kid and they sell their website.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Christ.

[Rika]

Yeah, I've seen that before. Yeah. Jesus is very nasty. Very nasty. Yes. Yeah, it is. Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Well, I. You know, Japan has nice stuff too. Fuck, I miss the damn. Why? You're making me want to fucking. You're making me think about like the Lawson.

[Rika]

Oh, baby. Lawson is the best. Lawson is a. Is. Is a genius. Yes.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Lawson is a genius.

[Rika]

Yeah, they have a lot of good food, and, you know, they have a good cake, and why raise it?

[Zoe]

I love it.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

There are. There are three main convenience store chains in Tokyo. There's the Lawson, the family 7:11, and yeah, they're open 24 hours. They have delicious food.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Fuck. All right. All right. I got to make it back there. I should have moved. No, I'm glad. I'm. I'm. I think it's okay that I didn't move, but I'm like, damn, Japan's pretty cool.

[Rika]

Yeah. What else do you miss about Japan beside convenience store?

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Well, I. Like what. Actually, what's funny is, while I was there, I was there for two months, and I went to a lot of stuff. Like, I went to.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

You know, I went to this, like, art party event thing. I went to this twitch event thing. I went to, like, poker night. I went to. I w. I was. Dude, I went to synagogue in Tokyo once.

[Rika]

That's so cool.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

My friend and I. I was just like. I was just like, I wonder what. Like, I wanted to show my friend, like, Jewish stuff. And so I was like, is there a synagogue? I was like. So I was like, is there a synagogue in Tokyo? Like, what is that? Like, and so we went and we had, like, Shabbat dinner at this synagogue in Tokyo, and it was all. There was, like. There was. There was, like, one Japanese. There was, like, one old Japanese woman there. I mean, there was a lot of people there. They were mainly, like. They were. They were from all over the world, but there's only one Japanese person there, and she wasn't even Jewish. She was just like. She was just like, I fuck with this. This is interesting. So she just shows up and. But, yeah, I went to all this stuff, and, like, it was cool because even though there is a thing, like, a little. A thing that feels, I guess, a little bit isolating or lonely about, like, being a foreigner in a country, there's so many spaces where you can get together with other foreigners. And so, like, the community aspect is really strong. Yeah, I went to this. Like, I went to. I went to this, like, English Prague, like, this thing where, like, you just show up and, like, people are like, there's. There's Japanese people there, but also foreigners, and everyone's just trying to practice their English. So you just show up and just talk to a table of people, and. Yeah, they just have all. They have all these different kinds of interesting events.

[Rika]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

So I felt. I felt like there's a strong There's a strong foreigner community there. Yeah, I miss doing that kind of stuff. That was fun.

[Rika]

Yeah. You should try to, I don't know, maybe hike. You should hike a little or just hike a mountain Fuji or some.

[Zoe]

I don't know.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Well, the last time I was there, we did the. The Nakasendo trail.

[Rika]

Yeah, Nakasendo. But I mean, if you try to. Or be near or the. Near the mountain Fuji or something, that would be cool.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Man. I don't know if I have it in me to hike some.

[Rika]

You're too tired.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Yeah, I like a nice. I like a flat incline. I'll take a flat incline any day of the week. That's my favorite kind of incline is none.

[Rika]

Yeah, I get you. Yeah. Yeah, I feel you.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Rika, you said your name was.

[Rika]

Yeah. Oh, I'm so glad you still remember my name. Yes.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Well, I also have it right in front of me.

[Rika]

Okay.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Actually, no, I have it right in front of me, but I didn't look at it, so I did remember it. Yes, I did remember it. I have it right in front of.

[Rika]

Me, but I didn't look at it.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

So I do remember that. Rika, I appreciate you sharing all this stuff with us. This was. This was a. Yeah, this is a fascinating call. This was. This. I feel like this was made. Was nostalgic for me just thinking about Japan and.

[Rika]

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

And learning about crazy stuff. I'm very. I'm curious. I'm gonna check out this. Whatever stuff that you send me.

[Rika]

Yeah, I will send you in your Instagram. So. Yeah, you can check it.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Is there anything we didn't cover? We talked for 48 minutes. Anything that we didn't cover?

[Rika]

I don't know. What about you ask me one last question?

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

You want me to ask you one more question?

[Rika]

Yeah, one last one.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

All right, let me think. What did you eat for. It's probably. It's. It's probably noon. It's the afternoon over there. What are you. What are you going to eat for lunch?

[Rika]

Yeah, excited. I'm probably make some. Oh, do you miss Japanese curry? That makes some curry with Japanese curry.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

You're gonna make. You're gonna make chicken katsu curry?

[Rika]

Yeah, that's. That's what's up. Yeah, actually, that's cool.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

That's like the. That's like the chicken tenders and fries of Japan.

[Rika]

Yeah. What's your favorite restaurant in Japan, though?

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

It's. There's a. Oh. Oh, Pepper. Pepper Grill. Pepper Lunch.

[Rika]

Pepper Lunch.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Pepper Lunch.

[Rika]

Pepper Lunch.

[Zoe]

Yeah.

[Rika]

Pepper Lunch is steakhouse.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Yeah. Pepper, lunch rocks. Fuck. Everyone go to Japan. Fuck it. Japan's so cool. I mean Japan. Going on vacation to Japan as an American is awesome. Undeniably.

[Zoe]

Yes.

[Rika]

Yeah, definitely.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Rika Geck.

[Angie Hicks]

Bless.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Have a good rest of your day.

[Rika]

Thank you.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

And thank you.

[Rika]

May I ask you that this call is like. Because I'm not sure it's an international call or what. What kind of call is that?

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Oh, this will cost me money. This. This will cost me money. Not you.

[Rika]

Oh, I'm sorry.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

I. This totally worth it. This. Wait. This call will cost. This call will cost. Hold on. I'm gonna tell you exactly how much money this call costs.

[Rika]

Oh my God. You can see from the PC.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

This call will cost me $2.

[Rika]

Only $2.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

It's 4 cents per minute. Or maybe it's 40 cents per minute. Hold on. If it's 40 cents per minute, this call costs $20.

[Rika]

And let me tell you something because I cannot down. Okay.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

I think 20. 20. $20. $20 well spent. We'll. We'll. We'll. We'll run an ad break and we'll. We'll. We'll make $20 to. To thank you for the call.

[Rika]

Thank you so much. Thank you.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Is there anything else you want to say to the people?

[Rika]

I don't know how to.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

What were you saying?

[Rika]

Don't do fentanyl. Okay, let me tell everyone say about that. Don't do fentanyl and don't do drugs too much and don't drink too much alcohol.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Those are wise words.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Zoe]

Yes.

[Rika]

Yes. And if you. No one. You just try to yourself. That's it.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

If no one will you just yourself.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Thank you Rika. Have a good rest of.

[Rika]

You're welcome. Thank you. Thanks.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Bye. Rika. That was. Rika. That was a good call. That was nice. That was. That was very entertaining man. Go to Pepper. Go to Tokyo and go to Pepper lunch. Dude, it's so good. They bring you this plate of. It's like. It's just like meat and rice and egg and vegetables. G. I mean I. You can get that at home. I can go to the grocery store right now and get that. But dude. Thing. Thing. Japan. I'm telling you. Egg. Egg. Japan. Egg. Japan beats egg every time.

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[Chelsea Handler]

Very exciting news about an ethical phone carrier I just switched to this is Chelsea Handler from Dear Chelsea. Forget about all these other phone companies. Forget about Verizon, forget about AT&T. Forget about T Mobile. There's this new carrier called Noble Mobile and they actually pay you to stay off your phone. You can earn real money, up to 20 bucks back every month just for putting your phone away. If you're like me and you're tired of feeling controlled by your phone, social media, or just disgusted by those screen time alerts, this is the answer. Go to noblemobile.com Chelsea and try it for $10. That's noblemobile.com Chelsea.

[Zoe]

Is this therapy Gekko?

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Yes. Hi. Who is this?

[Zoe]

Hi, my name is Zoe. Oh my goodness. Oh my goodness. I'm so excited.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Zoe, you texted me and you said, my name is Zoey. I need to know if I'm wrong or not about this absolutely dumb situation that I am in.

[Zoe]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Is that accurate?

[Zoe]

Yes. Yes.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay. What is this dumb situation that you were in?

[Zoe]

So I'm living with my boyfriend and his pretty much entire family. Like, but like I'm gonna give you a little like like little scenario for you. So there's one house and the house has me, my boyfriend, my daughter, and his aunt and uncle. And then there's a separate house behind our house. And that's where his cousin and his fiance and their three kids live. And low key. His cousin's fiance like dead ass really pissed me off. And I've been told that apparently I'm wrong in this situation. But like I feel like I wasn't.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

You have a sitcom Brady Bunch ass life, dude.

[Zoe]

Oh, trust me, I could tell you a whole. I could tell you my whole life story and you your job be dropped.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay, so why did your cousin. Okay, let me get this straight.

[Zoe]

Why my man's cousin's fiance.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Yes, your, your man's cousin's fiance is pissing you off? Why?

[Zoe]

So like I have. So my boyfriend has a daughter that sleeps over at their house because in our house we just don't have enough room. And like first like we had an addict area that could be for her, but it was just covered in dog piss all in the carpet and walls and everything. So like we just decided not to put her up there and just let her stay over at her technically and uncle's house. And so my mind you, my bonus child is a bedwetter. I love her dearly, but she has a little bit of a bedwetter. But so I got a text like 2 weeks ago from the cousin's fiance telling me that my bonus daughter, like mind you, she texted me at 5:56 in the morning and she pretty much just texted me while I was sleeping saying that my bonus child soaked through the pee pads and she was like. So she's going to either have to sleep in her own bed or in a plastic toddler bed because sometimes she's like to sleep with her cousin and she, so she also says, I don't know, nighttime pull ups. I don't know, I've been up since five with them, which is a lie because I went through their cameras and the. Her, my bonus child and her cousin didn't wake up till like I'm about to say like 5:50 in the morning. So I already knew she was bullshit from the beginning. And mind you, this is the third time that she has. I'll get, I'll get into it because she, she makes me so mad.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay, so, so, so I'm going to really, I'm going to really have to use my brain here to.

[Zoe]

Yes.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Comprehend the degrees of separation. Bonus child is your way of staying stepdaughter, right?

[Rika]

Yes, yes.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

That's a cute way. That's a cute way to stay. You know what? Like that. That's cute. I like that.

[Rika]

Thank you.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay. I've never heard that before too. I've never heard that. Bonus child. That's when. That's a. That's. Yeah, that's what you give to, like, a step child that you're, like, close with, you know? Sounds. Yeah, it sounds like. It sounds like you. I don't know if this. Is this girl's mother around.

[Zoe]

Yeah, she's around.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay.

[Zoe]

It's. It's like, we get. We get her on weekends, and her mom obviously has her on weekdays, so. Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay, so the boyfriend's cousins. Fiance. Where her. And from the perspective of her. Her fiance's cousin's daughter is peeing in the bed.

[Zoe]

No, my bonus child is peeing the bed.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Your bonus child is Your bonus child is this woman's cousin's. Your bonus child is this woman's fiance's cousin's daughter.

[Zoe]

No, she. So I'll make it so much simpler. So D is my boyfriend. B is the cousin's fiance. Oh.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

The bonus child. The bonus child. Okay. The bonus child is your boy. Okay, so. Okay, and. And this woman is your boyfriend's cousin's fiance.

[Rika]

Yes.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Have you ever seen the spongebob meme where the guy's like, okay, so this wallet has your ID on it, and it's got a picture of you and it's got your name. So this is your wallet? Yeah, so this is your wallet. That feels like the conversation that we just had.

[Zoe]

It gets so confusing when I try to tell people this. If people were known my dynamic, they would understand a little more.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

But it's okay, so. All right, this woman, whatever, she lives in this. Everyone pays equal amount of rent in this house.

[Rika]

Yes.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

That's important. Everyone is. Okay. All right. And the. Your bonus child, is she sharing a bed with this woman's fiance?

[Zoe]

No, she shares a bed with my. It gets so wordy. She shares a bed with her cousin, who's a girl as well.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay, so. Okay, so this woman has kids.

[Zoe]

Yeah, she has, like, three kids.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay, so this woman has three kids also living in that house. And then this girl. And then you're. Okay, so this woman has three kids also live in the house. Your bonus child is sleeping with one of her kids and pissing the bed.

[Rika]

Yes.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

And then this woman is getting mad at you because your bonus child is pissing the bed.

[Zoe]

Well, so she let me know that she was wetting the bed, but I was Asleep at this time. So, like, how am I really supposed to know? And I didn't text her until an hour later. And I said, just probably put her on a plastic toddler bed. Just have to make sure that she goes to the bathroom before she goes to bed. And then I asked her, I said, did she have anything to drink other than the Capri sun she had for dinner? Nothing wrong with that question, right?

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Oh, you're asking me. Of course. Nothing wrong with that question.

[Rika]

Yeah.

[Zoe]

So then she texts me back saying, I don't know. I don't keep track of her, and it's not my responsibility to keep. To continue to be up at night, an early morning every weekend with her because she pees.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

She. She's kind. She's kind of being a bitch. I mean, you know, you're all a strong. Those are strong words. But that was what. I'm trying to go off of my gut here. This one. Do I. Is this woman a bitch? I don't know.

[Zoe]

Well, this is like, the third time.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

But, like, I feel like. But I feel like. I don't know. You guys are doing a whole. Here's the thing, though. It's like you guys are doing a whole big. Do you. Do you. Okay. I shouldn't have called this one a bitch, too. Too fast. Because you're not, like, pawning the bonus daughter off onto her. Like, every. Like, this is. You're doing, you know, that. You know, it takes a village.

[Zoe]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

You guys, see, I don't. You seem like you have a unique dynamic. I'm not gonna pretend like I understand it, but it kind of just seems like you have this ecosystem. There's 8 billion kids running around. There's 8 billion adults running around. You guys have created this ecosystem, and in that fucking ecosystem, there's just kind of a thing where it's like, if you're an adult and there's kids and you're the adult in the room, you're kind of. You. Like, you know, it's not my. Like, whatever. Like, everyone. Like, we're all, you know, taken turns pitching and doing our part where, you know, she being a part of this community of some kind, like. Like, this woman has kids. I'm sure if the kids were at your house, you would feel that way towards them, correct?

[Zoe]

Well, not really, because.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay, never mind.

[Zoe]

I'll get, like, when I finish reading the BS that she has said. Like, I will, like, catch you up to sleep. Like, I'll give you back stories because.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Like, I'm having a hard time understanding the Front stories.

[Zoe]

It's like, her kids can always come over. I have never had a problem with her kids coming over. Like, sometimes her. Her youngest daughter will come over and, like, play with my youngest daughter. And, like, I wouldn't care because I'm like, she's keeping my baby occupied. Like, cool. I can finish some stuff. Like, you know, like.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay.

[Zoe]

But it's. But, like. Because like I said, we were gonna put my bonus daughter up in the attic upstairs because it technically was a room before my man's uncle decided to turn that upstairs into an attic.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay, but, like, I'm gonna.

[Zoe]

It's like I said, it was covered in dog piss.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay. I'm gonna ask some more pointed questions.

[Zoe]

Mm.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

You referred to your. I'm gonna call it your man. I mean, let's. You. Let's keep your man. I don't know if you guys are married or whatever. Who cares? Your man. Your man is your man. He's in your life. You love him. He's your family. He's your family. He's family so much that his daughter is your bonus child. That's really lovely. Does your man have a close relationship with his cousin?

[Zoe]

I would say, yeah. They kind of grew up together.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay, this woman that you're having strife with and her husband. They're. They're in. They're in your husband's. They're in your man's universe. This woman's in your man's universe, correct?

[Zoe]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Whether or not she's a central character for the past five years, she's It. She lives with him. She's in your man's universe. Do you think she'll continue to be in your man's universe?

[Zoe]

My. My thought. I hope not. But in reality, probably, yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay. And you wanna.

[Zoe]

I will let you know. I will let you know. This girl has switched brothers before she started dating this. Her.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Okay, hold on. But that's. I. I. The gossip about this lady is still. I. We're. I want to get pointed with this, okay? This. She's in your. For now. She's in your life, and she's in your. So, like, what's the most fucking, like, diplomatic way to go about this? Is what I'm saying. Like, you want this to be a good relationship. You want to approach it from that point of view. You want this to be a good relationship because she's in your man's life, however distantly, like, you know. You know what I mean?

[Zoe]

Mm.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

So. So if her. And Also, there's like 80 of you guys, and then there's 127 kids. So you're just in. You're just in this thing. You're just in this vast universe of all these people and all these kids. And so again, like, if her kids. And also her kids are friends with your kids, so you want. You want her kids are friends with your kids, and she's in your man's universe. So you want her kids to have a. You want to have a good relationship with this woman's kids. You want her to. You want them to be able to trust you and to. And to be excited to be around you, you know?

[Zoe]

Yeah.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

So, you know, you do your best to provide that for them. And then by the fucking grace of God, hopefully. And we can't control this, but. But hopefully this lady. Your. Your. Your. Your boyfriend's dog's doctor's daughter. Cunt, shit, fuck, ass. What part? This lady. We all know the lady. We all know who the lady is. By the grace of God, she'll want to reciprocate that because she'll. She'll see that you're extending an olive. An olive branch to her, but hopefully.

[Zoe]

And after what she said to me, I kind of don't really want to talk to her because.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

And that's like, that's your. That's your prerogative. If that's your thing, then go ahead, you know, But I'm just. I'm just from the perspective. From the perspective of you want to keep the peace because life's easier for you living in this community if you're keeping the peace. That's the way to keep the peace. But if. If you don't want. If you don't want to talk to her, you don't. You don't have to.

[Zoe]

It's just like this is like the third time that she has either said that I put my bonus child on, like, a back burner and that apparently I make my man not be a dad to her, which hurts my feelings because it's like, I never once, Like, A, I never talk bad about her parenting because A, it's not really my place to. And B, who the hell cares about my opinion about somebody else's parenting? And it's just like, I don't get why I ask a simple question, and then somehow it all turns to. Apparently me and my boyfriend don't take any responsibility for our kids and apparently that we just burden all of our children on them and that apparently we don't help with their kids, even though I have literally helped, like, with their. With her Youngest daughter, like over summer.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

What's your, what's your name again?

[Zoe]

Zoe.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Zoe. Zoe. You sound like a lovely person. Thank you. You sound like you care about the people in your life. Your bonus child. You've. You've. You've intentionally taken on giving a shit about people outside of yourself and even any and. And outside of your blood. I think that inherently makes you a nice person. And I don't know. I don't know anything about this other lady. She's. I don't. I don't know.

[Zoe]

She's on.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

I don't know. I don't know if I have anything more to say about this that I haven't said already. But you just told me your name. Zoe. Zoe. Is there anything else you want to say to the people at the computer before we go?

[Zoe]

No, honest to God, I'm good.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Sweet. Good luck, zoe.

[Rika]

Thank you.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

Bye bye. What? I don't know. I. That one. If you're. If you are on the Spotify comments or whatever the fuck, I chime in. Did I miss something? I gotta know. Hello folks, it's Lyle here. That's the end of this episode. But get this, I'm releasing a bonus episode this week. That's right, an entire extra hour of the podcast that you can listen to by becoming a premium member of Therapy gecko over at therapygecko.supercast.com Supercast subscribers get access to bonus episodes. They get a completely ad free podcast feed of the regular show. They get recordings from my live shows, members only streams and they help support my ability to continue doing this podcast. So here's a clip from this week's members only bonus episode. You said, hello, my name is Dhoni and I want to talk about how my secret relationship is going and how I developed Tourette's from it. And I read that. I was like, what? What the hell does any of this mean?

[Zoe]

So, all right, about nine months ago.

[Rika]

I began my, you know, first ever relationship with my girlfriend.

[Lyle (Therapy Gecko)]

If you want to hear this full conversation, you can sign up to become a premium [e-mail] or find the link in the episode description. That's therapygecko.supercast.com Alright, I have nothing else to say. Therapy Geckos on the line, making your phone calls every night. Therapy Gecko's doing it right, teaching you how to make. But he's not really an expert.

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[Chelsea Handler]

I have some very exciting news about an ethical phone carrier I just switched to this is Chelsea Handler from Dear Chelsea. Forget about all these other phone companies. Forget about Verizon, forget about att, forget about T Mobile. There's this new carrier called Noble Mobile and they actually pay you to stay off your phone. You can earn real money, up to 20 bucks back every month just for putting your phone away. If you're like me and you're tired of feeling controlled by your phone, social media, or just disgusted by those screen time alerts, this is the answer. Go to noblemobile.com Chelsea and try it for $10. That's noblemobile.com Chelsea hi, I'm Angie Hicks.

[Angie Hicks]

Co founder of Angie and one thing I've learned is that you buy a house, but you make it a because with every fix, update and renovation, it becomes a little more your own. So you need all your jobs done well. For nearly 30 years, Angie has helped millions of homeowners hire skilled pros for the projects that matter, from plumbing to electrical roof repair to deck upgrades. So leave it to the pros who will get your jobs done well. Hire high quality [e-mail] Honestly, honestly, honestly.

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No one wants to think about HIV, but there are things that everyone can do to help prevent it. Things like PrEP. PrEP stands for prevention, Exposure, Prophylaxis, and it means routinely taking prescription medicine before you're exposed to HIV to help reduce your chances of getting it. Prep can be about 99% effective when taken as prescribed. It doesn't protect against other STIs, though, so be sure to use condoms and other healthy sex practices. Ask a healthcare provider about all your prevention Options and visit findoutaboutprep.com to learn more.

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