“MY FURRY FRIEND GROUP EXPLODED”

Summary

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Therapy Gecko – “MY FURRY FRIEND GROUP EXPLODED”

Podcast: Therapy Gecko, iHeartPodcasts
Host: Gecko (Lyle)
Guests: Pickles (Fursuit Maker), Nick
Date: April 22, 2026

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Episode Overview

This episode, titled “MY FURRY FRIEND GROUP EXPLODED,” explores the emotional complexities and unique culture of the furry fandom through candid, humorous, and deeply personal conversations. Host Gecko (Lyle), an unlicensed lizard therapist, takes calls from listeners—starting with Pickles, a fursuit maker navigating the collapse of their tight-knit furry friend group, and then chatting with Nick, who reflects on digital life, social communities, and the art of simply existing.

With the signature blend of empathy and whimsy, Gecko draws out stories and reflections on belonging, identity, creativity, and what happens when communities—furry or otherwise—fragment and evolve.

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Key Segments & Discussion Points

1. [03:16–13:20] Pickles’ Furry Friend Group: Formation and Fracture

• Pickles’ Introduction to Furry Fandom:
  Pickles joined the furry community out of curiosity and began secretly crafting fursuits before friends discovered their hidden hobby.
  Quote:
  “Long story short... I joined the furry fandom because I thought it was interesting, thought it was cool... I kept everything hidden from them... And one of them actually found me.” (Pickles, 04:01)

• Unexpected Inclusion:
  Contrary to Pickles’ fears, the friend group was accepting and even joined the fandom. Pickles became the guide in helping friends pick fursonas and creating their suits.
  Quote:
  “You thought that they would make fun of you, but you converted them into furries.” (Gecko, 05:03)

• Selecting Fursonas:
  The process for choosing a fursona is simple yet meaningful, often starting with favorite colors and animals.
  Quote:
  “What's your favorite color and your favorite animal? That's pretty much what I did.” (Pickles, 06:59)
  Moment:
  Gecko jokes about the “sorting hat” style of assigning fursonas, adding levity and camaraderie to the discussion.

2. [08:12–10:38] The Group’s Downfall

• Red Flags and Group Dynamics:
  The group expanded to include a neighbor, leading to blurred boundaries as the neighbor grew overly close to other group members’ partners.

• The Cheating Incident:
  The group “exploded” after an affair between the neighbor and a member’s girlfriend came to light, leading to the breakup of both the romantic and friend group relationships.
  Quote:
  “...It came out a few weeks ago... This person's my ex now. And they were cheating... Apparently it had been going on since that large con of last year. So the whole group just kind of exploded after that.” (Pickles, 09:35)

• Aftermath:
  Only Pickles and their partner remain together, grappling with the loss of the wider friend group.

3. [10:53–14:46] Furry Culture: Fursonas, Community & Identity

• On Fursona Evolution:
  Pickles’ and their partner’s fursonas evolved with time and skill improvement—a point that leads to geeky banter about mythological vs. real animal choices (Anubis, wolves, tigers).
• Therians & Degree of Identification:
  Pickles explains the concept of “therian”—furries who literally identify as their fursonas, sometimes including full-time mask wearing.
• Spectrum of Involvement:
  From casual hobbyists to those for whom furry culture is all-consuming, the fandom accommodates a vast range of engagement.

4. [14:46–18:10] Furry Fandom Acceptance & Cultural Shifts

• Changing Perceptions:
  Gecko reflects on seeing sincere “fursuit check-ins” online and how public attitudes have softened. Once-mocked, furries are now met with acceptance.
  Quote:
  “Being, quote, unquote, cringe is, like, not the worst thing you can be now... When you see a wolf guy telling you to, like, drink water, you’re like, you know what? Thanks, man...” (Gecko, 15:25)

• Pickles’ Experience:
  Initially nervous, Pickles grew to appreciate the creativity and support of the community and overcame fears about attending meets.

5. [18:10–21:47] After the Explosion: Moving On & Healing

• Processing the Loss:
  Pickles describes feeling possibly used as a suit-maker and support system, with lingering awkwardness over unpaid “friend prices.”
  Quote:
  “I can't help but sort of feel like I was maybe used... One of them wasn't even like paid off all the way...” (Pickles, 18:10)

• Fursuit Ownership Dilemma:
  Pickles debates returning suits made for the now-estranged friend, recognizing that healing requires letting go.

6. [21:47–25:12] Fandom, Conventions, and Joy

• Atmosphere at Cons & Meets:
  The vibe at conventions is described as “super chill,” inviting, and conducive to low-pressure socializing.
  Quote:
  “If you have a suit, you are going to get attention... The furry fandom, like, you're just a character... It's almost, like, inviting.” (Pickles, 21:54)

• Accessibility & Acceptance:
  Discussion about the liberating aspect of wearing fursuits (“you don’t need to be super attractive”), and how conventions foster belonging.

7. [25:12–32:25] What’s Next for Pickles

• Looking Forward:
  Pickles is planning to attend upcoming cons, start an Etsy shop, and keep building their fursuit business for others’ joy.
  Quote:
  “I've made probably about what, 20 suits and there’s nothing better than, you know, seeing somebody get their suit and, you know, love it.” (Pickles, 25:30)

• Shoutout/Plug:
  IG: @grapes_the_tiger; TikTok also available. Commissions mostly closed but quotes open.

• Convention Drama:
  Playful discussion of overlapping furry conventions and internal fandom politics, with Pickles explaining how conventions may split due to disagreements.

8. [32:25–35:12] Banter & Wrap-Up

• Fandom Gear:
  Gecko admires Pickles’ craftsmanship, referencing “Thanos gloves” and custom robotic hands for Five Nights at Freddy’s-inspired suits.
• Final Words:
  Pickles’ advice:
  “Keep being awesome and don’t take advantage of people.” (Pickles, 32:35)

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9. [36:16–68:53] Second Call: Nick – Digital Life, Community & Connection

Phone, Internet Addiction & Social Media Detox ([36:16–44:57])

• Searching for Offline Existence:
  Nick shares his journey trying to live “under the radar,” periodically deleting social media to reduce anxiety, while acknowledging the tether of modern connectivity. Quote:
  “I would love to exist without being required to have a phone... but, like, I guess to, you know, to get around in this world today you kinda need a phone to do most things.” (Nick, 39:02)
• Both bond over digital routines, especially enjoying YouTube videos for comfort and sleep:
  “I put on like three hours of Crash Bandicoot trivia... and it's the best... I genuinely can't tell you for sure which of those experiences I find more enjoyable [compared to cuddling].” (Gecko, 43:34; Nick calls this “the most relatable thing” at 44:57)

Sleep Habits, Relationships & Acceptance ([44:57–54:38])

• Falling Asleep Rituals:
  The tension between needing video/audio as sleep aids and sharing a bed with a partner who may not—sometimes a dealbreaker, sometimes a shared joy. Quote:
  “I'm genuinely afraid of my ability to get married and have a family because it will interrupt my ability to do that.” (Gecko, 63:24)

• Anxiety, ADHD, and Structured Stimulation:
  Both discuss needing constant stimulation and finding healthy outlets through hobbies, exercise, and communities outside the home.

The Importance of Community Spaces ([54:38–61:39])

• Communal Life & Aging:
  Gecko muses on seeing senior homes advertised as social, activity-rich environments and ponders the comfort of returning to childlike community in old age. Quote:
  “Isn't it interesting that, like, if you live long enough, you get to just go back to being a kid... and your reward for sticking it out is you get to go back to being a kid again?” (Gecko, 59:49)

Dreams and Medication ([61:39–66:19])

• Sleep and Dreams:
  Nick describes vivid dreams induced by melatonin, including a cryptic “M&M dream” interpreted as a metaphorical lesson on acceptance. Quote (Dream):
  “He got in my face and said, ‘This guy gets it.’ And then there was a flash of light and I woke up…” (Nick, 66:19)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “You thought that they would make fun of you, but you converted them into furries.”
  — Gecko, 05:03

• “There’s a very large spectrum of people in the furry fandom, for sure.”
  — Pickles, 13:40

• “Being ‘cringe’ is, like, not the worst thing you can be now… When you see a wolf guy telling you to drink water, you’re like, you know what? Thanks, man.”
  — Gecko, 15:25

• “You don’t need to be super attractive... you kind of just put on some paws and a tail and poof, like, it’s fine.”
  — Pickles, 23:32

• “Keep being awesome and don’t take advantage of people.”
  — Pickles, 32:35

• “I genuinely can’t tell you for sure which of those experiences I find more enjoyable.”
  — Gecko, reflecting on comfort from YouTube videos vs. intimacy, 43:34

• “Isn’t it interesting that, like, if you live long enough... your reward for sticking it out is you get to go back to being a kid again?”
  — Gecko, 59:49

• “Everything’s cool. Go outside.”
  — Nick, 68:45

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• 03:16 — Pickles joins the call; furry group origins
• 04:49 — The group discovers Pickles’ furry identity and joins in
• 09:35 — The cheating incident and dissolution of the friend group
• 13:20 — Explaining “therians” and different levels of furry involvement
• 15:25 — Shifting public attitudes toward furries (“cringe” becomes “cool”)
• 18:10 — Processing the loss of the friend group, suit-making business
• 21:54 — What it’s like at cons and meets
• 25:30 — Pickles’ plans: future conventions, fursuit business
• 27:16 — Convention drama in the New Jersey furry scene
• 32:35 — Pickles’ final advice to listeners
• 36:16 — Second caller, Nick: Digital reliance, phone use, and social media
• 43:34 — Digital comfort vs. romantic connection
• 54:38 — Community, aging, and communal life
• 61:39 — Melatonin, dreams, and personal metaphors
• 68:45 — Nick’s parting words

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Tone and Overall Vibe

The episode is playful and self-aware, mixing irreverent banter with real emotional vulnerability. Gecko’s style invites laughter, but also cultivates a space where callers can open up about niche passions, heartbreak, and existential anxieties. The furry fandom is treated with a mix of curiosity, respect, and in-jokes, creating an environment in which authentic connection and quirky humor coexist.

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Final Thoughts

• The episode offers an empathetic and uninhibited look at what happens when a cherished community fractures and how people heal and rebuild.
• It highlights the importance of hobbies, social groups, and safe spaces in adulthood, as well as the odd (but universal) comforts we all derive from our routines—be it fursuiting, conventions, or three-hour gaming trivia marathons.
• The Therapy Gecko’s universe is one where anyone, regardless of how “cringe” or obscure their interest, can be deeply understood and celebrated for simply being themselves.

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Transcript

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[Gecko (Host)]

my Therapy Gecko Live show tour is starting very soon with shows in San Diego, Los Angeles, all over the Pacific Northwest and all over the country, the country of America and like three cities in Canada. You can look at all of the cities that are available and get tickets right [e-mail] or check the Link in the episode description. These shows will be a combination of group gecko therapy sessions with the audience, plus I've got stories of my own that I will be telling from my travels across the universe, interviewing people as a gecko. The shows are always a great time. If you like the podcast, you're gonna love the live show.

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And if you bring friends who have

[Gecko (Host)]

no idea who I am, the show is set up so that they will

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probably like it too.

[Gecko (Host)]

Go to therapygeckotour.com or check the link in the episode description to get tickets right now. I hope to see you guys there. And with that said, let's get into the episode.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Hello?

[Gecko (Host)]

Hi. Hello. Is this Pickles?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yes.

[Gecko (Host)]

You texted me and you said my furry friend group exploded.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yeah, I did.

[Gecko (Host)]

Your furry friend group exploded. Like, not literally. They combusted into feathers. They. The interpersonal relationships amongst your furry friend group have. Have gone astray. Is that what I am to understand?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yes.

[Gecko (Host)]

So what happened? Was there some sort of inciting incident?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Oh, man, what a long story. Okay, well, let's see. Where do we start? Me and my boyfriend had a friend group, Obviously, we met one of. We met a couple in the group maybe, what, five or six years ago, and we became really good friends with them. Long story short, it's been probably five or six years at some point. I joined the furry fandom because I thought it was interesting, thought it was cool. I was making suits, I had a social media, and I kept everything hidden from them because I wasn't comfortable sharing it with them. And one of them actually found me.

[Nick (Guest)]

Wow.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

So, yeah, the whole group kind of found out about it. Figured, you know, tell one, you tell them all. And everyone was really cool with it. So they actually kind of got into the fandom.

[Gecko (Host)]

Oh, you converted them. Wait, that's crazy. That's great. You were hiding this from your friends, and little did you. It's so funny. You thought that they would make fun of you, but you converted them into furries.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yes.

[Gecko (Host)]

That's awesome.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Definitely. Definitely one of the best outcomes I could have gotten, for sure.

[Gecko (Host)]

That's. That's awesome. Okay, go ahead.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

So, yeah, so they joined. I helped them make their sonas. I helped make their suits.

[Nick (Guest)]

Okay.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

And then. So all. We pretty much did that all Last year, however, the group is two couples and another person kind of joined it, um, which is our neighbor.

[Gecko (Host)]

What?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yeah, so it was us two couples. Um, we also became friends with, um, our. Our neighbor as well, who was. He's just like a single guy, lives at home. So he joined the group as well. So our group is now like five pretty much.

[Gecko (Host)]

Okay. And you helped everyone. So everyone was like, oh, we want to get into this too. And you were kind of like the. The guiding hand for everyone through all of this. So you helped everyone pick their fursonas, or sona for short. Yeah, apparently. How I. Now I. Okay, I'm curious about this. Like, were you doing, like a sorting hat kind of a thing where you asked them a lot of questions and then you were like, you are a turtle. You are a fox. Like, how. Like, if I came to you and I said, I. I want. I want your help picking a fursona. What. How would you help me do that? What kind of questions would you ask me to help me build this profile of myself?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

I feel like a good place to start is always like, your favorite color and your favorite animal. That's pretty much what I did.

[Gecko (Host)]

That's. Hold on. That's a total cop out, by the way. That's a total cop out, by the way, to just be like, what's your favorite animal? Okay. That's what you should be.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yeah. I mean, if you. If you like the animal, it's easier to kind of attach to it. You know what I mean?

[Gecko (Host)]

I. You know what? I think I'm trying to over complicate this for no reason.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Maybe. I don't know. That's pretty much what I did. There's. There's people that have, like, their own, you know, custom characters that have backstories and.

[Gecko (Host)]

Right.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Different personalities and stuff. But, like, I don't know, I just. I just wanted to be my favorite animal and color.

[Nick (Guest)]

So.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

No, I'm over complicated ideas, but yeah.

[Gecko (Host)]

Okay. So you help everyone make their fursona, and then everyone's getting into it, the neighbors getting into it. And then how did things all fall apart?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Well, the. Around the middle of last year, we went to, like, a really big con. And then for the time after that, it seemed like the neighbor was starting to cross some boundaries. I guess I'll say he was getting really close with, like, myself and my friend's girlfriend. He would kind of come over to, like, our house, like, I won't say uninvited, but, like, unannounced. And he would just kind of like, show up. He was trying to hang out with us and was succeeding with the other person. Um, I don't know. I just like, more than like a normal friend in a group would. With someone's girlfriend.

[Gecko (Host)]

Oh, he was trying. So that was already like one of the girlfriends.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yeah.

[Gecko (Host)]

Okay.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

It seems that way in hindsight, but, you know, over, you know, that period of months, you know, like, red flags were kind of raised. Both the boyfriends would, like, talk to him and be like, hey, can you, like, step off? They would talk to their girlfriends and be like, hey, can you, like, also step off? But ultimately it came out a few weeks ago, I guess, shortly after probably. I texted her before I texted you, and we just. We got a message that was like, you know, this person's my ex now. And they were cheating because they decided to check her phone. And apparently it had been going on since that large con of last year. So the whole group just kind of exploded after that. So.

[Gecko (Host)]

Wow.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Kind of where we're at.

[Gecko (Host)]

Okay, so you're back to being a proverbial and literal lone wolf.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yeah, me. Me and my partner are still together. It was, unfortunately, the other, you know, group that we have met and, you know, made a relationship with over time, but now, obviously, they're not together, and now one of them's going on like a. You know, they're, you know, dealing with everything. So, I mean, they're both dealing with everything. But, yeah, pretty much. We lost pretty much the entire friend group, so we're just kind of dealing with that now.

[Gecko (Host)]

Okay, so you're. I hear someone in the background. Is that your.

[Nick (Guest)]

Your. Your.

[Gecko (Host)]

Your. So,

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

yes.

[Gecko (Host)]

And are they also a furry.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yes. He supports me in it. Yes.

[Gecko (Host)]

Okay. What is he. What's his. Who's he? What's his fursona?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

He is a purple wolf.

[Gecko (Host)]

Wow. Okay. What are you?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

I'm a purple tiger.

[Gecko (Host)]

You're a purple tiger. Was that a coincidence that you guys are both purple, or is it like you can only. Like, the animals can only have sex with each other if they're the same color?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Now, originally, he. He started out as a completely different species, but that's kind of when I was learning to make them, so it didn't turn out very good. And then he actually became an Anubis, like the Egyptian, like, dog God.

[Gecko (Host)]

Oh, shit. Okay. I actually. You know what? I think that's cool. Is there, like, a hierarchy between, like, do. Do the people who choose to be creatures that have mythological origins think they're better than the people who choose creatures that are bounded by reality?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

I think some might. We have seen there's another person that's an Anubis as well, and he seems to have a different aura. He definitely has a. I don't know. He has a different aura than us, for sure. We just kind of go to Hang out and be silly.

[Gecko (Host)]

You know, it's funny. I. Wait, actually, hold on. He has a different. In what way? A different aura. What do you mean? Like, he takes it more seriously.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

How do we describe the other noobus? He's just, like, in his, like, body language and how he, like, walks around. It's like, slower. It's like. I guess maybe like, confident could be a word, but, like, you know, like, he has, like, a presence more.

[Gecko (Host)]

Do you do. How into it do people get? Like, are there some people who genuinely start to believe that they are these animals?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

The ones that usually believe their animals are usually classified as therian. This is definitely. Yeah, yeah, those are the ones that, like, definitely identify. Like, I am a wolf. I am a, you know, lynx or whatever. They usually wear, like, the masks over, like, the entire suit.

[Gecko (Host)]

Okay, so fairy. And that's a word for, like, a person who genuinely, literally believes and identifies themselves as an animal across all aspects of their life,

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

I think. I don't know if that's like, a perfect definition and I'm sure there's different people that. At different, like, degrees of it.

[Gecko (Host)]

But don't worry, no one's gonna get mad at you.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Observation of it. Yeah, that's. That's, like, my understanding of it. Yeah, we've definitely met. There's a. Oh, there's a. There's a very large, like, spectrum of people in the. In the furry fandom for sure, though, in the years we've been in it.

[Gecko (Host)]

Interesting. Was like, okay, like, what's the most hardcore intuit a person gets?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

That's a really good question. I guess they would be. I. I would describe it as their life's probably overtaken by the hobby in a way that, like, all, like, a hunt. Like, a lot of their money goes into it. It's pretty much like their life at that point. They're probably traveling to places. They probably have, like, a dedicated social media or, like, multiple. Maybe even, like, sonas, I guess. I'm. I'm not sure. I don't think. Yeah, I'm not. I'm not sure that that would be, like, my guess on that.

[Gecko (Host)]

You know, it's funny that we're talking today because this morning I was. I was on Instagram reels. Tell me if this feels right to you. I was on Instagram reels and I. I got a reel of this guy in, like, a wolf fur suit and he was going like, hey, everyone, this is a check in. Did you have your water today? Did you take your medication today? How are you guys Feeling, I hope. And he was being, like, very sincere and wearing this fur suit and it, like, in 2011, a video like that. If you looked at the comments, all of the comments would be like, this is cringe. This is lame. Fuck this guy. But I swear to God, all I was looking through the comments, and there were lots of comments from, like, all people from all walks of life just being like, you know what? Thanks, Wolfman. Appreciate you. This was very nice. You know, I feel like, culturally, because there's. Because, like, since. Since, like, 2010, like, I guess when I assume that kind of furry culture was. Was, like, first introduced to the mainstream of existence since 2010, there's just. There's so much, like, crazy stuff going on in the world that, like, being, like, being, quote, unquote, cringe is, like, not the worst thing you can be now. You know, I mean, there's so many people being like. There's so much stuff out there that's, like, actively hostile and actively, like, up. That when you see a wolf guy telling you to, like, drink water, you're like, you know what? Thanks, man. Like, I feel like. I call it, like. Like, culture is, like, softened in, like, kind of a nice way. Do you get what I'm saying a little bit?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yeah. Yeah, it's definitely. It's definitely, like, expanding and a lot more, like, acceptable now, for sure.

[Gecko (Host)]

Mm. Because, yeah, like, with all these, like, I don't know, there's so much, like, crazy shit online that, like, you know, in, like, in 2010, like, a guy in a wolf suit would be like, whoa, that's crazy. But nowadays, it's like, you know, it. Live your life. It's one of the ways in which I do think society is maybe healing.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yeah, it's. It's definitely. It was definitely, like, a jump, and it took, like, some time to get used to, I think, even, like, our. Our first time even trying to go to, like, a meet, like, I was too scared to even just, like, get out of the cars, and we just sat in the parking lot. So it definitely took some time, but I think that's part of the fun is, you know, learning to overcome that. The community is super, super supportive and accepting. I like the art a lot because there's so many creative people and characters. I. I don't. I haven't had, like, a really terrible experience or anything or, like, met anybody super malicious. It's been. It's been pretty chill, and I. I really like doing it,

[Gecko (Host)]

so. Okay. Now that your previous furry friend group has dissipated, are you considering Joining or creating a new one. What's that looking like?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Definitely, yeah, it's definitely been a big part of it because I can't help but sort of feel like I was maybe used in this to help them like make their suits. One of them wasn't even like paid off all the way. But like I don't really care about that. I just wanted, you know, my friends to have fun and to get into it.

[Gecko (Host)]

Wait, you f. You finance. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You financed some one of your friends suits?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

No, like I, I gave them like a super reasonable like friend price and they didn't even pay that

[Gecko (Host)]

well. Oh, so you made it for them after.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yeah, yeah, I made all of my friend suits.

[Gecko (Host)]

Really? That those. Because I know that those things like I know that those things are expensive. It's like what, like $15,000 for like a good one.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

That's for like a crazy maker like that. That would be like the Gucci of suits. Most I'd say like an average like from a. It's a really like wide range. You can get some really good stuff from smaller makers though for I think you could get like the pause head and tail for maybe around 1500. Pretty average.

[Gecko (Host)]

Damn. So you feel like they use you to create their fursonas and then left you in the dust.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

I'm not, I don't, I truly don't think that was their like direct intention. But you know, I can't help but sort of feel that through, you know, bringing them into this, like it kind of caused and led to that and I guess encouraged it because we would constantly go to meets or there would be meets that, that they would go to. I think from. We just, we finally went to like the first one this year and I definitely felt better about it and kind of remembered why I like doing it and a lot of it's socialization. So you know, we met some new people, met some other people we know. So it definitely made it feel better. But you know, it is just still that, you know, the whole thing, you know, it's going to take some time to just kind of let that in the past. I do also have my friend's suit still.

[Gecko (Host)]

Oh you do?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

So that. Yes, yes. As soon as that went down, I was keeping her suits at my house. And so when that went down, obviously I was like, cool, don't come anywhere near me right now. So I kind of still have them and at this point I definitely feel like it's time to I guess give them back. I don't know, I feel like I wanted to keep them just to prevent them from being able to go to. Just to prevent her from kind of going to the cons and just, you know, for lack of better words, ruining it or, like, you know what I mean? But I think at this point, I've reached a point where I think I just need to, like, give it back to her and then just heal from there. So that's probably what I'm doing this week, actually.

[Gecko (Host)]

Did you. Have you ever tried it on?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yeah.

[Gecko (Host)]

And what is it? Okay, so when you wear a fur suit that does not match up with your internal Persona, how does that feel?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

It feels. It feels kind of weird, you know, especially, like, you know, you, like, you can't help but put, you know, look in a mirror when you do it, and you're just like, I'm this person, but I'm not this person.

[Gecko (Host)]

What's the vibe like at these meets, these conventions?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

It's super chill. A lot of. If you have a suit, like, you are going to get attention. A lot of people come up and, you know, ask for pictures or they trade stickers and trinkets. I carry stickers on me all the time. And, you know, you just kind of socialize and talk and stuff like that. I think one of the cool things about suiting is, like, if you went to a comic Con, you might see somebody, you know, dressed like Superman. You're like, oh, cool, That's Superman. It's almost, like, inviting. And I think the furry fandom, like, you're just a character. Like, you're not like some guy in a hoodie hiding in the corner. You're a cool purple dog in the corner. Like, yo, I love purple. What's up, man? And it makes it, you know, really inviting to interact with people.

[Gecko (Host)]

Well, personally, I think wearing an animal costume is a bit bizarre, and it's something I'd never even consider doing.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Right.

[Gecko (Host)]

How did Is it. That was a joke. Because I'm a gecko.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

I. I got you. I picked up on it.

[Gecko (Host)]

Well, yeah. How would it be? You know, it's. No, no, Everything you're saying, I fully. I fully do get that. Like, even, like. Like, I know, like, you know, whatever. It's funny. Even if I wasn't, like, like an Internet guy or whatever, like, just being in a costume, walking around, it does make you feel like you're. You're, like, going. Getting outside of yourself.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yeah, it's. It's really cool. I've never, like, been like, a Supergirl, like, good at makeup. Like, I'm not like a supermodel by any means, but that's another cool part of the fandom too is you just put the head on, right? Like you don't need to be like a super. You don't need to be super attractive. You don't need, you know what I mean? You kind of just put on some paws and a tail and poof. Like it's fine.

[Gecko (Host)]

So what, what do you think it would be like if I went as a gecko? Like, how do you think? Actually, I guess of all of all the, like, it's funny because I think of all the places where I would go to do my gecko thing, I feel like it wouldn't, it wouldn't work there because the whole point of the gecko thing is like I kind of stand out a little bit. That would be the only, that'd be one of the only places I could go to do it where like I would actually blend in more, I think. Right?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yeah, no, I think you would definitely blend in pretty good. Out of Furry Con, is there a

[Gecko (Host)]

certain section just for scalies? I know that that's kind of its own subculture.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

It's pretty open to everyone. There's people that just do like normal cosplay know, we'll dress up as, you know, whoever. Only I'd say for every three people, really only one of them has a suit. So there's a lot of human it's. But yeah, there's all sorts of different species. Yeah, I mean it's, it's really like, it's, it's definitely an experience. Not something you can really find in any other convention.

[Gecko (Host)]

Okay, so before we go, what's next for you in your furry pursuits? Is there a con coming up? Is there a new Fursona? You're exploring what is next on this adventure

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Right now we do have, I think we're gonna do a one day con this weekend. And there's a large one coming up pretty much in the middle of. Not in the middle of, in July. But for me, I'm kind of just, you know, I'm continuing to focus on pretty much my little fursuit making business. I might make an Etsy and I'm gonna just keep bringing, you know, joy to people. I've made probably about what, 20 suits and there's nothing better than, you know, seeing somebody get their suit and, you know, love it. That's like the best feeling in the world. So that's what I'm going to keep doing.

[Gecko (Host)]

Plug it up, Pickles. What's the. How do we. How do we. How do we get a fur suit from you? I want a plug.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

I can share my Instagram handle if you want. And I hit is grapes. Underscore the underscore Tiger.

[Gecko (Host)]

Grapes the tiger. I wanna. Hold on. I gotta redownload Instagram. I wanna live. Look at this.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yeah, I have. I have a tick tock as well, but that's just. It's gonna.

[Gecko (Host)]

Let's. Let's do some banter while I wait for Instagram to download. Yeah, yeah, Banter. Yes, banter. Hold on. All right, it's a quarter. We're quarter of the way there. It's downloading. Let me think of a question to ask you. What's this convention that you're going to tell. What's. What is. What is the One Day convention? What's it called?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

The One Day One is an event in New Jersey. It's called. Forget About It.

[Gecko (Host)]

Forget About It. All right. I'm look. All right, great. I'm going to look this up right now. Forget. Forget about it. Forget about it. 2026. Come hang out. Come hang with us in the 80s this year. Is it an 80s themed?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yeah, this year it is.

[Gecko (Host)]

What the fuck?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

This looks never really super. Yeah. Yeah. You're not like, I wouldn't anticipate walking into like an 80s scene or anything, but, like, some of the signage might, you know, have that on it. The dance will probably have some music from there.

[Gecko (Host)]

I gotta come to one of these things at some point as the gecko. I think that would be. That would be pretty sweet. This, these conventions. I love. I love a Con. I used to go to. I mean, I love a con. I used to go to anime conventions when I was a kid. You know, going to VidCon and TwitchCon is fun. Like, I love, love, love, love going to cons and festivals and. Okay, Instagram.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yeah, these are kind of my first experience with any sort of con. And they've been. They've been super cool. Some are better than others for sure. But even if you just like show up and a lot of them are at like hotels and stuff, I mean, you're going to see tons of people and tons of characters.

[Gecko (Host)]

Oh, there's. Oh, look at this. The timing of this convention overlaps a firm meet. What gives? We did not intend on these dates to overlap, but unfortunately it is the closest date available. It looks. It's okay. Oh, look at this. We do not wish to cause tension with the community and want to make it clear we are not in competition with any groups or events inside or outside of New Jersey. Is this. Is there some drama going on that the forget about it convention is overlapping with a different fur convention?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

It probably is the. I. I'm not super knowledgeable about it, but I believe the New Jersey one split. So they have two different people or two different, like, groups of people running two separate conventions. I think as they disagreed on some things. So they actually have them separate now.

[Gecko (Host)]

Damn.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

So they probably booked. Booked on the same day.

[Gecko (Host)]

Look at this.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

This is the other one.

[Gecko (Host)]

This is under their Q and A. We do not care about clout, drama, or status. For anyone thinking differently, they are sorely mistaken. And the board would like to direct them to our point above about working together.

[X Program Advertiser]

Respect.

[Gecko (Host)]

Okay. All right, Gilly, give me your. Give me your. Give me your thing one more time. I'm gonna look into it.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

It's grapes. The tiger with underscores as spaces.

[X Program Advertiser]

Grape.

[Gecko (Host)]

Like grape jelly.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Grapes. Like. Like the purple. Yep. Like the purple food. I was not very creative.

[Gecko (Host)]

Grapes. The tyber. Oh, look at that. Oh, commissions are closed. Are they closed?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

They're. The commissions are closed, but, like, quotes are open. I kind of just have it closed. So I don't get a ton of, like a ton of people. But you can. You. You can feel free to hit me up. I've been pretty much giving people commissions kind of. I'm at a point where I can kind of at least choose which projects I work on. Cool. So I've been accepting some of the quotes that are sent to me.

[Gecko (Host)]

Dude, look at this.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Or like, the characters that are sent to me.

[Gecko (Host)]

Holy fuck, dude. Look at this. Big ass purple tiger. That's so awesome. That's crazy that you made this.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yeah, it's. I've been doing it since 2023, so I've. Each project, I've definitely learned something new with it. Now I have my own sort of head bases and stuff. I love business and, you know, I like giving back to this community too, so.

[Gecko (Host)]

Whoa.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

One day at a time.

[Gecko (Host)]

I just checked your story and you have these, like, Thanos gloves that make the fucking fur.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Yeah, the robot fingers.

[Gecko (Host)]

Yeah, the robot fingers. Do those go on every. Do those go on everything? Like, do they go on all the.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

No. One of my current commissioners, his character is based on a. On like a Five Nights at Freddy's. Kind of like. He's an animatronic. So the commissioner asked if there was a way I could come up with like, the hands being robotic. So that's. I found that print file and I just got the settings right on it. So those were printed today.

[Gecko (Host)]

Wow. Much respect to you, Grapes the Tiger. Much respect.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Thank you.

[Gecko (Host)]

Is. Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

I guess, you know, keep being awesome and don't take advantage of people.

[Gecko (Host)]

Rock and roll. Thank you, Grapes the Tiger. I'll. I'll see you around the universe.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Thanks. You too. See ya.

[Gecko (Host)]

Maybe I'll. Maybe I should. You know what? Maybe it's time, folks. Maybe it's time, folks. Maybe it's time to upgrade the gecko suit to like, you know, because right now you can see my face, right? What if I just got like a hyper realistic gecko suit that like you couldn't see the face and I really just like kind of got deep into being a gecko and I. And I. And I made. Made the thing look less human. I made it just look hyper realistic and abandoned my humanity and dove head on into. Into committing to Lizard. Lizard Dome. Maybe it's time.

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[Nick (Guest)]

Hello?

[Gecko (Host)]

Yo, what's up, dude? What's your name, dude?

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

Is it.

[Nick (Guest)]

Is this the real Gecko?

[Gecko (Host)]

This is the. This is me. This is someone. This is a person alive.

[Nick (Guest)]

Hey, Lyle.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

I'm gonna.

[Nick (Guest)]

I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go by Nick. Nick, that's my name today.

[Gecko (Host)]

I knew a guy named Nick in middle school. He was very popular. I don't know what he's doing now. I don't know if he's still popular. Popularity.

[Nick (Guest)]

He's probably really famous.

[Gecko (Host)]

He's probably really famous. You think?

[Nick (Guest)]

Yeah, he was popular in middle school. He's probably really famous now. But I think if he was like a stage name, if he was really

[Gecko (Host)]

famous, I think I'd know.

[Nick (Guest)]

That's a good point.

[Gecko (Host)]

Are you famous?

[Nick (Guest)]

No, I'm the opposite.

[Gecko (Host)]

Would you want. You're the opposite. What's the opposite of famous?

[Nick (Guest)]

The. I think the opposite of famous as, you know, like, under the radar.

[Gecko (Host)]

You're under the radar?

[Nick (Guest)]

Like not. Not in like a. Not like a crazy way. Just like, you know, just like everybody else.

[Gecko (Host)]

Yeah. Do you like being under the radar?

[Nick (Guest)]

Yeah, I mean, like, I. I used to want to like start a YouTube channel, do all that stuff. But like, as I get older, I kind of just want to live life like none of that exists, you know?

[Gecko (Host)]

Yeah. How's that go? How's that going.

[Nick (Guest)]

Honestly, pretty good. I periodically delete social media off my phone and it's when I'm happiest, but I have to, I have to download it again because, or like, you know, periodically because my friends want to show me silly little memes and, and you know, I have, I have to, I have to keep up with what my friends enjoy too, because that's being friends.

[Gecko (Host)]

It is true that. Yeah, I mean, whatever, they've done studies on this. Not like they need to for us to know this. But yeah, that shit causes an insane amount of anxiety being on your phone and shit.

[Nick (Guest)]

Tell me about it. Yeah, dude, I, I, I'm thinking of installing like a completely new operating system on my phone just so I can like, avoid all of that.

[Gecko (Host)]

Okay, so if you're avoiding social media, what do you, what are you moving towards? Or do you, or are you just existing, which is fine too. What do you want to, where are you at?

[Nick (Guest)]

I just want to exist without being, I would love to exist without being required to have a phone. And I know in a literal sense, I don't, I'm not legally required to have a phone. I'm not physically required to have a phone, but like, I guess to, you know, to, to get around in this world today you kind of need a phone to do most things. And I, I like, I, I envy people who grew up and lived like young adult lives with before carrying around phones.

[Gecko (Host)]

Well, let's talk about it. We, how old are you?

[Nick (Guest)]

I'm 27.

[Gecko (Host)]

Okay. All right. Yeah, so we're the same age. Why do you feel like you need, why do you feel, I mean, I have my own answers to these questions that probably have lots of flawed logic in them, but why do you feel like you need a phone to exist?

[Nick (Guest)]

So, I mean, I'm, I'm definitely guilty of developing a dependency to it. I like, use my gps, I do doom scroll. Totally guilty of that. And I communicate to all my friends I need it for my job so that if anything comes up with work, they can reach out to me. One of the managers at my job went off on some guy because he didn't have a phone for two days because his phone broke and he just didn't immediately replace it.

[Gecko (Host)]

That's crazy.

[Nick (Guest)]

But yeah, I, I, I try to like, fun parts of my week where I can like leave my house and leave my phone at home, like just going on walks or, or run runs and things like that. But like, I gotta end up coming back to it. I really wish I could just get rid of it. But like, there's so much of my life tied to my phone. And I'm not saying, like, you know, my life being like, obsessed with social media or anything like that. I try to really avoid it as much as I can, but, like, you know, I pay for stuff with my phone. Everyone that needs to contact me contacts me through my phone. And I. I don't know. That's a. That's a totally normal thing. But like I said, I always, like, wonder what it would have been like to grow up before cell phones were. I think I say grow up, but like, not just grow up, but like, live a life, an independent life, before phones were a major thing and required.

[Gecko (Host)]

Yeah, it's. The phone is like an extension of the body at this point, and it was great. I really. I can't. This, like, this is sad. I'm going to say this is sad. This is really sad. I really don't think I can imagine my life without the Internet. When I think about my life without the Internet, I'm so bored.

[Nick (Guest)]

Yeah, I completely agree with you. I mean, I just got home from picking up food and I was about to turn on YouTube while I ate. I watch YouTube while I eat and go to sleep or, you know, while I eat and then like watch YouTube to fall asleep almost every night.

[Gecko (Host)]

Same, same, same. And I.

[Nick (Guest)]

What am I supposed to do while I eat if I don't have the Internet?

[Gecko (Host)]

And here's the thing. I. Okay, well, there's some stuff, right? Like, like scrolling reels. I hate it. If I could. If I could eliminate all the time I spent scrolling reels, I would do it. I mean, I can, but like, that stuff I would easily eliminate painlessly. I like. I mean, it's. My job is like making Internet content and I like doing that. And that feels good to like, build stuff using the Internet. I really enjoy that aspect of it. I fucking love eating lunch and watching a YouTube video. And I fucking love falling asleep every night. I fall. I put on like three hours of like, Crash Bandicoot trivia or whatever the fuck it is, and I fall asleep and it's.

[Nick (Guest)]

Yeah, the no gaming videos.

[Gecko (Host)]

That's why. Oh, my.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

That's exactly what I fall asleep every night, you know?

[Gecko (Host)]

Ball, you motherfucker. Oh, my God. You know, bowl, dude. Hell yeah. Okay. Yes.

[Nick (Guest)]

And then I learned, like, all this unnecessary video game trivia through osmosis while I'm asleep.

[Gecko (Host)]

It's the best. It's the best. I love it. I. I don't care. I don't care if it's unhealthy for me. I. Dude, I. Can I tell you something? I. I have had many nights. I. I've had many nights where I've fallen asleep. Like, I'm closing my eyes, I feel really tired. It's like midnight and I have a video on and I'm in my own bed and I'm like, this is a peak life experience. I've been. I've. I've. I've like been in bed cuddling with a beautiful woman and in complete silence and darkness. And then I've been in bed single and alone, falling asleep to a three hour long video about like Crash Bandicoot Facts. I genuinely can't tell you for sure which of those experiences I find more enjoyable.

[Nick (Guest)]

What you said is the most relatable thing I've ever heard in my life.

[Gecko (Host)]

Dude. I don't like, it's like, have you ever, like, you ever. Have you ever had that thing where like you sleep with someone and then you're like, hey, do you like is. Do you like watching? It's a soul crush. Like, I'll sleep with someone, I'll be like, do you like. When like, are you. Do you like falling asleep to stuff? And they're like, no, I hate it. I can't fall asleep without it. And I'm. And we're just like, we're sitting there in like darkness and I'm like, I think, why do I feel like I'd rather be alone listening to this YouTube video right now? Like, does that make me insane? That must be a defect.

[Nick (Guest)]

No, I. That. I don't think I mean it. It definitely doesn't make you insane. I feel like it's more common. Like, it feels like a weird thing to do, but it's like a hundred percent something that like most people do, especially if they live alone. The. My. My girlfriend just moved out of state, but when, when she was here and we'd sleep together, she'd. She always had to fall asleep to something.

[Gecko (Host)]

I. I have a thing.

[Nick (Guest)]

Like if I, if I'm sleeping. If I'm like sleeping with somebody, I don't feel the need to turn something on. I just. It's easier to fall asleep, I guess. But like she had to turn something on or else she wouldn't fall asleep. And like, she would always put. Put in her headphones. But I, I saw she was like, she would watch. What was it? The, the Smosh podcast that. Yeah, like they were reading. Like, like am I the. And I. And I convinced her to not use her headphones. And so I got like, the best of both worlds. I got to fall asleep to some random person talking on a, on a YouTube video. And, you know, with somebody, it was the best. Like, like, you're talking about, like, you're, you're talking about, like, not really feeling the difference between, like, falling asleep with a beautiful woman or falling asleep with. Did you know, gaming in your ear, but like, doing those things at the same time.

[Gecko (Host)]

Yeah, right. Right. Dude, it's so funny. It's. I, I genuinely. I could genuinely see that being something that would, like, break up my marriage. You know what I mean? Like, like, if that, like that being a difference of, like, if I, like, if I, I, I'm. I'm terrified that, like, I'll one, like I'll find like, the love of my life. Like, like somebody who, like, I'm so deeply, like, attracted to. They're attracted to me. We're in love. We're super compatible. Except that she needs to sleep in, like, total silent darkness. Like, that could break up my marriage for sure.

[Nick (Guest)]

Yeah, no, it's. I, it can. It can be like a scary deal breaker. That's why, that's why I like, kind of condition myself to, like, I guess not need it if I'm. If I'm not alone. But that, that she, she was like, super cool about it or like, you know, she. She just also needed it. So it just. I don't know. That worked out. That was, that was, that's the best. That was a really cool scenario. And while I think you would find somebody that needs to fall asleep to do gaming, I don't.

[Gecko (Host)]

I don't know. I mean, everyone's like, different. Like, it is a. It is a very, like, personal preference. Like, there are some people who are, like, cannot fall asleep without it. And I don't know. It's the. Yeah, I, Yeah, one night I tried to fall asleep without it and I just couldn't. It was just like, I just had so much anxiety. I. If I have. Dude. Yeah, it is. It's just like an anxiety thing or like an ADHD thing. Like, I just need to be. I think I've always had this thing where I need to be stimulated, like, at all times. Like, it's, it's the reason why, like, you know, I mean, I do all this shit, like, you know, going on tour or making documentaries or, like, living in a city or, like, being addicted to the Internet, being the food or drugs or whatever. It is like, just always, like, this is constant need to be stimulated and it's Caused. I think there's like, healthy outlets for it. Like, I think my constant need to be stimulated has led me to a lot of like, beautiful life things and a lot of stuff that I'm like, really proud of. But it's also led me to a lot of stuff that I'm like, oh, I would love this to not be a part of my existence. You know what I mean? Like shit like doom scrolling or like, you know, not being able to sit still. But there's, it's like, like, if you have that, if you have this like, like anxiety stuff, like I do, I do feel like it's like a kind of, it's kind of this like energy that you can't just like ignore. Like, you have to out. You have to find an outlet for it and there's positive outlets for it that'll like, make your life better and the life of people around you for it better. And then, and then there's like negative outlets for it, like, you know, eating a bunch of shit or jerking off 10 times a day or like, whatever. Like, there's, there's, there's different ways for that energy to be put out there, you know? Are you like, Are you a big like ADHD crazy person?

[Nick (Guest)]

Oh, yeah, 100%. I was diagnosed with ADHD as a kid and I haven't taken, I haven't taken meds for it a long time. I'm actually like, finally at a point where I feel like it'd be okay to take ADHD meds again and like, try that out. But yeah, I always got to be doing something. And I also, I hate. I live alone with my cat and you know, I, I hate being home. I mean, I like being with my cat and I need to spend time with him, but outside of that, I don't really like being home. So I always try to find something to do. Like, you know, when I'm at work, I'm. I'm at work. But when I get off work, like today I went straight to the rock climbing gym. I got there at 6:45 and I didn't leave until 10:30.

[Gecko (Host)]

Yep. Yeah.

[Nick (Guest)]

And I, yeah, I, I have. And this is kind of like, not, not. I, I didn't do this necessarily because I heard it from your podcast, but I have heard it from your podcast. Like, you know, find, find a community. If you need stuff to do, find a community and they'll give you stuff to do. And, and I, I have like a, like a ton of like, like range from good friends to really, you know, good Acquaintances at. At the gym I go to and I even. And I have people that, like, at a group chat, like, we. We try to plan to go at the same time because, like, rock climbing, the kind of climbing we do is like a partner thing. You need somebody to blame you. But, yeah, even. Even if nobody's going, I know when I go to the gym, I'm gonna see somebody I know and then run into somebody and. And have a cool conversation. Yeah. And. And exercise and feel like all those things. Cause endorphins.

[Gecko (Host)]

Oh, yeah.

[Nick (Guest)]

And just make you feel good.

[Gecko (Host)]

Yeah. I've talked about it to death on this podcast just because I think it's like, it is like, something that I believe is like, at least. I mean, everyone's. Everyone's wired differently. Like, there's some people who talk about, like, being a homebody and, like, they. They don't really like leaving the house, and they don't. And, you know, that. That feels like. Like being a homebody is like a kind of a foreign concept to me. Like, I just always feel like I need to be out and, like, having exactly what you just described. Like, having something where, like, you know that there's a location that you can go to where if you go there, you will see someone. You know, it's such a great. It's so, like, I think, important to, like, at least. At least for me, it's like, very important to, like, the homeostasis of my existence. You know, just having, like, a place to exist. Because you can't really. You really. At least in my opinion, like, I don't think you can really, like, run an effective social life that. That needs to be, like, planned out in advance. Like, like, you can't really run an effective social life with, like, four different people that you like, individually have to schedule where. When you're gonna.

[Nick (Guest)]

Oh, yeah.

[Gecko (Host)]

You know, I mean, you just need like, a. Especially as you get older. I mean, you have that naturally when you're in, like, high school and college. Like, you just. Just. Just happens. Like, you need a place to go where, like, naturally things just happen. Like, the gym is a great one. Like, if you're lucky, maybe your workplace kind of feels like that. But without. Without something like that, like, life. Life does feel a lot more hollow.

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[Gecko (Host)]

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[Gecko (Host)]

I think I've said this on the podcast before but like I I was walking, I saw like a I I walked, I was in Astoria. And I walked past this, like, old folks home being advertised, and it was like, like they were advertising it. And it was like, we do. We do field trips with the seniors, and we have, like, music classes and, you know, cooking classes and stuff. And I, I. It made me really happy to see that because I was like, damn, if I can make it to, like, 80 years old. I would have a great time in a place like this.

[Nick (Guest)]

You know, that stuff is so cool. Like, my. My grandmother, she. She passed away back in November, but she had dementia, and we. After my grandfather passed away, we had her in a. A home closer to where my parents live, like, a home like that. But, like, even though she had dementia, she was still able to go, like, on those field trips and, and all those activities and stuff.

[Gecko (Host)]

Awesome.

[Nick (Guest)]

Whenever we'd go visit her, she would, like, talk about how much she, like, hated it there. But then, like, you know, we'd leave and then they'd, like, do activities, go on field trips and stuff. And they had, like, a Facebook page where they take pictures of the. What's the word? Like, they. Yeah, they take pictures of the seniors. And like, my grandmother would. She'd always be in, like, the center of the photos doing whatever activity they were doing, whatever craft or whatever thing they were doing with a massive smile on her face, like, clearly having a good time.

[Gecko (Host)]

Hell, yeah.

[Nick (Guest)]

And, like, I know it was just the dementia, like, her, you know, like, not wanting to be there, but, like, that, that. That kind of. That kind of thing is so good for them. And, and like, you know, if you're a perfectly healthy senior, that stuff's cool too. But, like, you know, even. Even just, like, being there, hanging out with them, like, they have no idea how. What kind of an. I mean, they, they have an idea, but that's why they do it. But it has such a good impact on. And yeah, I think that would be a fun life to, like, just like, always have an activity to do and not have to worry about what the next one's gonna be because it's. There's just always something to do.

[Gecko (Host)]

Put me on the. Right. I'm on the record here, by the way. Put me in a home. If I'm, like, however old and I. And I start, like, developing dementia, like, put me in a home. I want to be in the. Isn't it interesting that, like, like, I

[Nick (Guest)]

don't want the gecko suit.

[Gecko (Host)]

No, no, no, no. The geckos. By the time I'm 80 or the. The gecko suit will be. Will be Defunct, I'm sure. But what the fuck was I gonna say? Oh, it's like, I don't know, like when I was like, like I went to like sleepaway camp and all that and like all these places where like, you know, you have little stuff. Isn't it interesting that like, if you, if you live long enough, you get to just go back to being a kid? Kind of. It's like you're a kid at the very beginning and then if you make it to 80, you kid, you can just be a kid again and like,

[Nick (Guest)]

you're the one getting taken care of again.

[Gecko (Host)]

Right, right, right, right. You have this like long stretch in the middle and your reward for sticking it out is you get to go back to being a kid. That's. What. Cuz that's because I don't know. Like, like, honestly I do. I mean like when I saw that place being advertised in Astoria, I was like, it kind of made my existential dread go down a little bit because I was like, oh, you're telling me I could like, you know, when I'm. If I'm lucky, right? If I'm lucky and I make it old age, I stop eating so many peanut M and Ms. And you know, get my shit together. Like if I make it.

[Nick (Guest)]

Those are the best kind of M and Ms.

[Gecko (Host)]

They're the best kind of M and Ms. If I make it to 80 and like, you know, even if I develop, if I like start going crazy or whatever, at least I like, if I can do that. But like, at least be around other people who are also like dying and going insane, I'm like, all right, I could, you know, hey, like dying and going insane, like alone in a dark room sounds awful. But doing it with other folks, I'm like, all right, I could handle that.

[Nick (Guest)]

Yeah, like if you're going insane and just like in an environment where you're just meant to have a good time and you have no other option. Really. Like, that doesn't sound too bad.

[Gecko (Host)]

Man, I can't believe there's another. I mean they have a fair amount of views, but I, I'm so glad to connect with another person who falls asleep to the those three hour video game trivia.

[Nick (Guest)]

Oh yeah. I've never met anybody else that like, it's so. It's like. It's either that or Game Grumps compilations for me lately that I fall asleep to, but it's. It's mostly the did you know gaming one. But I, I've kind of been burning through them and like rewatching some of them because, like, I know I'm going to fall asleep.

[Gecko (Host)]

That it's so nice.

[Nick (Guest)]

I. Actually, I. I've had trouble sleeping for a while. Like, ever really, ever since I was a kid. But like, like back in college once I stayed up for like five days straight. But I recently got prescribed some sleeping medication and I was really scared to try it because of the side effects, but I finally just said, fuck, I'm going to try it because I couldn't fall asleep. And it, like, it worked a little too good.

[Gecko (Host)]

Yeah.

[Nick (Guest)]

And I ended up falling asleep at work the next day. So I was like, okay, I can't take these. But that. So then, like, I tried it for a couple nights and like, just like, gave up. And I know like that kind of thing, you're supposed to take it longer and it evens out in your system or whatever, but I couldn't keep falling asleep at work. But like, falling asleep to the, like the. Did you know Gaming videos.

[Gecko (Host)]

Oh, yeah.

[Nick (Guest)]

It instantly knocks me out.

[Gecko (Host)]

Dude, Popping a melatonin and putting on three hours of Super Mario Sunshine making of is just one of the best feelings in the world. I genuinely think I'm genuine. I am not even. I'm seriously afraid of my ability to like, get married and have a family because it will interrupt my ability to do that.

[Nick (Guest)]

Are you a vivid dreamer? Does like, if. If you take a Melatonin? Because I always find I feel like I have really weird dreams. I take melatonin.

[Gecko (Host)]

Yeah.

[Nick (Guest)]

And you're like, falling asleep to the, like the Mario Sunshine shit. Do you feel like it influences your dreams?

[Gecko (Host)]

Yeah, I have recurring dreams where I'm in like a fucking jigsaw trap. That's horrible.

[Nick (Guest)]

Yeah, but like, only when you take melatonin.

[Gecko (Host)]

No, they just. They just visit me when they want to ruin my day. Actually, when I stop smoking weed, the dreams get. My dreams get fucking crazy. Crazy vivid. Does that happen to you really?

[Nick (Guest)]

Well, I. So I've never smoked weed, so I wouldn't know. But like, I did. I do for a while. I was like taking like three melatonin every night.

[Gecko (Host)]

Three melatonin.

[Nick (Guest)]

And. Yeah, because, like the. Well, I. I had these gummies that said take two, but like, two. If I took two, I still felt really wired. It would still take me like four hours to fall asleep. So I started taking three and it worked, but I would have insane dreams. I think I texted you about one of them once. Let me see. Yeah, well, okay. I can't find the text, but I said it was Something about like a prophetic or prolific dream about Skittles or not kills Eminem.

[Pickles (Fursuit Maker)]

The.

[Nick (Guest)]

This is not gonna. I'll. I'll. Do you. Do you want to know about the dream?

[Gecko (Host)]

Sure, let's hear about the dream because. And then. And then I'm gonna let you go.

[Nick (Guest)]

So I. That's fine. I. By the way, I really appreciate you calling me back because, like, my. My food that I just picked up just, like, fell all over my carpet and I had to go get other food and that, like, I missed your call, like, while I was cleaning it up. And you have no idea how much this has made my day that you call me, like, so cool. I love your podcast so much.

[Gecko (Host)]

It's you. It's made my day to connect with another person who watches these video game trivia. Like, there's such. Like, there actually are such a key part of my life. In a weird way,

[Nick (Guest)]

I. I have found myself wondering, like, I wonder who else falls asleep. But yeah, anyway, the dreams. So this probably isn't gonna make any sense because it was a dream, but I. So I was like, just. For some reason, I was like, just in a park with, like, a bunch of, like, benches and tables and like a bunch of random people were all sat at them, including myself. And there was this guy walking around and with. With a bag of M&M's and handing them to people. And like, every time he'd go up to somebody and. And they like, let him pick an M and M out of the bag, they'd, like, pick one and then he'd give them the option to like, put it back or eat it. And everybody kept putting theirs back until they got when they wanted. And. But he came to me and I picked one and it was like. It was a red M M. And like, it didn't. It didn't matter. I. And he, like, got my face and he's like, well, what are you gonna do with it? And I said, I'm just gonna enjoy it. They're all the same. And I ate it. And he, like, got in my face and said, this guy gets it. And then there was a flash of light and I woke up. And I was like, oh, was that some meaning of life dream I just had? I. It. I feel like there was some metaphor that I still haven't quite gotten from those M and M's.

[Gecko (Host)]

Nick, I have no idea what you were just saying, but I think that's ok. I think that's how you experienced it. So I actually think that me not knowing any. Any of what the hell you just said is actually accurate to what you were attempting to make me feel by saying it. So I actually, in that way, understood more of what you said. I. I understood more of what you said by not understanding it. By that logic,

[Nick (Guest)]

I'm cool with that.

[Gecko (Host)]

Nick, is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?

[Nick (Guest)]

Everything. Everything's cool. Go outside.

[Gecko (Host)]

Beautiful. Thank you, Nick.

[Nick (Guest)]

Thank you. Have a good night.

[Gecko (Host)]

You too.

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Hey everyone, it's Kalpen.

[Public Investing Advertiser]

I'm inviting you to join the best sounding book club you've ever heard with my podcast, Hearsay The Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club. Every episode, I nerd out with amazing guests and dive into the best new audiobooks available on Audible. It's the book club for your ears. Listen to Irsay, the Audible and Iheart

[Gecko (Host)]

Audiobook Club on the iHeartRadio app or

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[Podcast Announcer]

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