“THIS POCKET PUSSY RUINED MY JAPAN TRIP”

Summary

Therapy Gecko – “THIS POCKET PUSSY RUINED MY JAPAN TRIP”
iHeartPodcasts | March 15, 2026

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Episode Overview

In this lively and candid episode of Therapy Gecko, host Lyle dons his signature lizard-therapist persona to take calls from strangers wrestling with life’s oddities and existential dilemmas. From a young man’s shamefully erotic detour on a Tokyo trip, to the tangled love life of a gay “bear” navigating polyamory, to the somber realities of rat farming, Lyle combines irreverent humor, surprising compassion, and absurdity in equal measure. The episode is a tapestry of sexual honesty, cultural observation, deadpan exchanges, and gently delivered advice—never shying from big feelings or ridiculous predicaments.

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Segment 1: “THIS POCKET PUSSY RUINED MY JAPAN TRIP”

(Taylor’s Call) — [01:48–15:56]

Key Discussion Points & Insights

• Taylor’s Tokyo Confession:
  Taylor, a 23-year-old visiting Japan for the first time, recounts how a visit to Akihabara—Tokyo’s pop-culture district—unexpectedly led him into an eight-story sex shop. After a playful encounter with a gachapon (capsule toy) machine, he acquires a “pocket pussy” (masturbation aid).

• Binge & Regret:
  What begins as curiosity spirals into compulsive use—Taylor admits:

  “I’ve jerked off like five times today, dude, like these things are really good.” (Taylor, [05:11])

  He confesses to neglecting sightseeing and developing a rash.

• Shame, Normalization, and Perspective:
  Taylor is embarrassed about his trip “wasted” on masturbation, but Lyle reframes it:

  “If you told me that you bought a DVD player and now you’ve watched five movies on your new DVD player, I’d be like, what the fuck are you talking about?” (Lyle, [06:05])

  Lyle reassures him that indulging isn’t inherently shameful, especially after eight days of proper tourism.

• The Local Experience:
  Lyle humorously validates Taylor’s detour as “authentic,” paralleling the universal act of “going home and jerking off” when traveling:

  “If you really want to have the local experience...go home and jerk off. That’s what most people are doing in most places.” (Lyle, [16:03])

• Absurd Detail:
  The conversation devolves into Tokyo’s unique sex store offerings—including armpit-scented perfumes and bizarre panty-vending machines.

Notable Quotes & Moments

• Taylor: “I’m buying some booze and I drink every day...and you’re telling me, ‘Oh, that’s great, dude, keep doing it.’ Like, come on.” ([06:40])
• Lyle: “Go to Mount Fuji, climb to the top, and jerk off there. That’s a real story.” ([09:20])
• Lyle’s advice: “If you do it, just embrace it. Don’t fight it.” ([13:35])

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Segment 2: “Bear Polycules, Open Hearts, Open Apps”

(Eric’s Call) — [19:29–58:47]

Key Discussion Points & Insights

• Rollercoaster Relationships:
  Eric, a self-identified “bear,” reflects on leaving a 7-year relationship due to intimacy issues, then embarking on an open relationship that evolved into joining a couple as their “third.”

• Love Triangles and Boundaries:
  The emotionally tumultuous union with the couple involves conflicting preferences, pressure from “the network,” and difficult questions about exclusivity.

• Internal Conflict:
  Eric struggles with asking:

  “If it came between being open and being with me, which would you pick?” ([33:27])
  The couple indicates they’d “pick being open,” devastating Eric.

• Jealousy and Exclusion:
  Eric shares the pain of being left out:

  “They hadn’t bought me [a construction vest for a party]...they were like, ‘You just got that game, you probably want to play that or whatever.’” ([38:40])

• Self-Worth and Polyamory:
  Lyle offers tough love, elucidating Eric’s peripheral role:

  “These guys, like, they have their couple thing going on...you’re not in the main club.” ([51:09]) “You want someone who wants you with them at the orgy.” ([52:45])

• Moving Forward:
  Lyle urges Eric to put himself out there, embracing new connections without clinging to the couple:

  “Don’t fucking sit here and, like, wait for these dudes who...didn’t want you to come with them to the orgy.” (Lyle, [51:30])

• Emotional Honesty:
  The call ends with Eric acknowledging his pain—but taking advice to heart and humorously offering Lyle a rare Pokémon.

Notable Quotes & Moments

• Lyle (on coping): “I believe that you have no problem putting yourself out there...you don’t want to settle for these guys...they really didn’t choose you.” ([47:12])
• Eric: “I’m hurting, man.” ([45:46])
• Lyle: “I endorse making a comment on the Spotify...if you’re Eric and you’re listening...we’ll have sex. I endorse that happening for you.” ([58:06])

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Segment 3: “Rats, Labor, and Knowing When to Stop”

(Bella’s Call) — [61:31–72:26]

Key Discussion Points & Insights

• Unusual Profession:
  Bella wakes up from a nap to share her job: working at a rat farm, where she raises rats as reptile food.

• Ethics and Detachment:
  Despite being surrounded by death, Bella speaks with pragmatic resignation about the rats’ fates:

  “They get treated with a lot of, like, respect before they gotta go...they don’t know what’s coming.”

• Power Dynamics and Empathy:
  Lyle prods Bella about the moral weight of her work, joking about the power of “letting a rat go free,” and her willingness to do so if a rat begged for its life.

• Family Business, Life Goals:
  The job is a family affair; Bella lives on-site. Beyond work, she aspires to learn “how to be happy” and detach her worth from productivity.

• Emotional Honesty:
  Bella shares her struggles with hopefulness, confiding:

  “I had some stuff happen...I can’t remember it, but it sits dormant...and it makes things difficult to be hopeful.” ([69:58])

• Lyle’s Reframe:
  Lyle reframes Bella’s perseverance as a strength:

  “You can always stop, but you don’t, which makes you strong.” ([71:00])

  The conversation ends with jokes about smuggling pet rats, familial lenience, and Bella promising to name future rat children after Lyle and his show.

Notable Quotes & Moments

• Lyle: “I don’t pay you to make friends with the rats. That’s what I tell everyone who gets into this business.” ([66:10])
• Bella: “To learn how to be happy, to have a life outside of making money.” ([69:36])
• Lyle: “Free those MF rats, all right?” ([72:13])

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Memorable Quotes Highlight Reel

• Taylor (on Japanese sex shops):
  “It’s just tons of dudes in suits right off of work, and they’re all just...super casual. No one’s even batting an eye.” ([10:39])

• Lyle (on travel authenticity):
  “If you want to have a local experience, that’s what you should do. Go home and jerk off.” ([16:03])

• Eric (on heartbreak):
  “I miss talking to them about everything...I’m just yearning for that again.” ([43:42])

• Lyle (blunt wisdom to Eric):
  “They didn’t want to add you into the couple...you were a member of the swing. You’re not in the main club.” ([51:09])

• Bella (life philosophy):
  “I’m hopeful that I’ll keep moving forward because I know that I can’t stop.” ([70:20])

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The Therapy Gecko Tone

The episode is equal parts absurd, sincere, and profane—mixing gross-out humor (pocket pussies, scented armpit sprays, rat murder) with surprising gentleness and universal life guidance. Lyle’s therapist-gecko persona is alternately a deadpan provocateur, a cheeky confidant, and an existential cheerleader.

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Takeaways for New Listeners

• Embrace your quirks, even the embarrassing ones—they’re probably not that unique.
• Ask for what you want in relationships, but be ready for real answers—and don’t settle for the emotional periphery.
• You can always stop, but choosing not to is its own form of strength.
• There’s something deeply human about jerking off alone, raising rats for snakes, or wanting to be chosen by someone else—and Therapy Gecko has room for all of it.

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Timestamps Reference Table

• Taylor’s Tokyo sex-shop story: [01:48–15:56]
• Eric’s polyamory/relationship rollercoaster: [19:29–58:47]
• Bella the rat farmer: [61:31–72:26]

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For listeners new and old, this episode is a prime snapshot of Therapy Gecko’s ethos—no topic off-limits, a celebration of weirdness, and the gentle suggestion that whatever you're going through, someone, somewhere has probably done it five times in Tokyo already.

Transcript

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[Eric]

Hello?

[Lyle]

Hey, can you hear me? Yeah Taylor, you texted me and you said give me a ring. I need some help after visiting a certain store in Akihabara. For those who do not know, Akihabara is known as the eccentric. Let's call it the eccentric anime pop culture neighborhood of Tokyo, Japan. Are you currently in Tokyo, Japan?

[Taylor]

Yeah man. I'm staying in Shinjuku right now.

[Lyle]

Oh cool. I am also in Japan at this very moment.

[Taylor]

Oh cool man. Very nice. Are you liking it?

[Lyle]

It's awesome. Tokyo is a great, great town. I'm doing a show here at the Tokyo Comedy Bar in a week. Come through. That'll be fun. I don't know if you're still but

[Taylor]

no, I leave on Wednesday but I'm sure. It'll be a good time.

[Lyle]

That's. I love. I love. It's funny. There's something funny about just like, I feel like I'm going door to door asking whoever is in Tokyo if they want to come to the show now. It'll be a good time. Okay. What store did you go to, dude?

[Taylor]

I don't know. I went to this one with, like, this green sign. It's like, kind of off the main road. And they're like. They, like, set you up and they have these, like, anime girl, like, post like, like, face cards. You can kind of like go in and like. And so me and my buddy, you know, we took a flick in the front and we, like, walked in the store thinking it was like one of those, like, you know, regular anime stores that sell, like, merch. Turns out it's like an eight story, like, sex store. Okay. And there's just like, salary men, like, everywhere, like, on every floor. And everyone's super casual about it, you know, and so you're kind of, like, around. They have this, like, gotcha machine in the front. And so, like, obviously, you know, I turn it because I'm a for Gotcha machines.

[Lyle]

Okay.

[Taylor]

And turned out it was like a pocket. Right?

[Lyle]

Listen, listen, listen. What? What's the problem here, man? What do you need help with? This is. This is all. We're getting there.

[Taylor]

We're getting there.

[Lyle]

Okay. All right.

[Taylor]

We're getting there. We're getting there.

[Lyle]

Was your. Was your corrupted at the 8? How old are you?

[Taylor]

I'm 23.

[Lyle]

You're 23. Okay. You know. You know what a pocket pussy is?

[Taylor]

Of course, of course. Well, I never used one, but it's just like a little egg.

[Lyle]

Have you ever. It's okay if you have you also. Have you ever used one of the homemade ones? I feel like I've talked about this at least three times on the podcast.

[Eric]

No, bro.

[Taylor]

No, I haven't. Dead ass.

[Lyle]

I haven't.

[Taylor]

I just really love Pringles and stealing. It's stealing sponges.

[Lyle]

All right, go ahead. Yeah,

[Taylor]

so it's like, shaped like an egg and it's like, you know, I'm on, like, a trip with, like, my, like, a bunch of my buddies. And so, you know, obviously I, like, I open it up and I figure out what it is, and I take one of my secret showers. I'm like, this is pretty good, you know?

[Lyle]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

And so I went back the next day and I got another one. And like, like, I got an actual one. And, like, I've jerked, like, all My buddies. But I've jerked off like five times today. Dude, like, these things are really good.

[Lyle]

So what's the problem?

[Taylor]

And I don't know, the problem is I can't stop jerking it. And I. Weiner has a rash. Like a. Like irritation.

[Lyle]

Listen, you bought a product that was meant to. To increase the enjoyment of your masturbation sessions.

[Sponsor Voice]

I.

[Lyle]

Why are you.

[Eric]

I think.

[Lyle]

Why are you disappointed in yourself? There's a brick.

[Bella]

You're so.

[Taylor]

You're so.

[Eric]

You're so.

[Taylor]

My name's Taylor.

[Lyle]

Taylor. Taylor. There's an eight story building. There's multiple of them. There's building. Not eight stories maybe, but all over the world there are these shops that are dedicated to creating products to increase the people's sexual enjoyment of. Of. Of the time spent either by themselves or with others. You're. You're not the only. What, what are you ashamed of? This is a classic thing. Like, I just. What are you ashamed of? You know? This is good. You. It's like if you told me. It's like, it's like, it's like. No, no, it's like if you told me that you bought a DVD player and now you're. You. You've watched five movies on your new DVD player, I'd be like, what the are you talking about?

[Taylor]

This is like, dude, the analogy to this is like, oh, I bought. I. I'm buying some booze and I drink every day. Like, and I love taking 14 shots a day and you're telling me, oh, that's great, dude, keep doing it. Like, come on.

[Lyle]

Now this is different. It's a little different. Okay, so you did this whole. By the way, also, you're gonna get bored too. Like, what? You jerked off five times with this thing?

[Taylor]

No, dude, that's. I think I'm jerking off because I am bored, but I don't know why I'm bored cuz I'm in Tokyo.

[Lyle]

Yeah, well, okay, actually, actually, actually now I think about it, the worst part of this is that. How long have you been in?

[Taylor]

I'm in the Ford, dude. I've been. Dude, I've been here for like a. About a week. I'm here till Wednesday. I'm like. I just like. Cuz my buddies were all. They all left because like I'm staying longer and I'm like, wow, I really just spent all your time jerking my dick in my hotel alone.

[Lyle]

Listen, listen, listen, listen, listen, listen. Okay. It's your first time in Tokyo?

[Taylor]

Yeah, dude, this is my first time America and I spent one of my Days with a fucking pocket pussy.

[Lyle]

This is your first. Okay, so this is your first. Your first trip out of side of America.

[Taylor]

Oh, yeah.

[Lyle]

And okay, the day that you spent with the pocket pussy, what number day was that? Was that your fourth day? First day, second day, third day?

[Taylor]

This is day number eight.

[Lyle]

Oh, day number eight.

[Taylor]

Is it cool after? Is it. Is it cool after a certain point? Like, of course it's cool.

[Lyle]

It's totally. If you've been in Tokyo for eight days, okay, whatever. You saw the stupid cherry blossoms, you walked around, you had some ramen, you had your little adventure. You. You saw the sights, you took the pictures, you did the whole. Yes, spend a day jerking off. It's okay. It's fine. If this, if it was like your like second day or something and you spent the whole day inside jerking off. Honestly, second day, if it was your second day, you spent the whole day inside jerking off. I'd be like, you got. You got like what, 10 more days? You got your, you know, it's okay, listen.

[Taylor]

Eight days. You're telling me what I want, What I. What I want to hear.

[Lyle]

You've been there for eight days already have a break to jerk off. What have you. No, it's true.

[Taylor]

You know, you are right.

[Lyle]

Have you. You've done all the stuff. What else is there to do, man?

[Taylor]

Yeah, I guess we're getting it done. I mean, don't. Fuji. I guess I could go to Mount Fuji then jerk off some more.

[Lyle]

Go to. Go to Mount Fuji. Go to climb to the top and jerk off there. That's a. That's a real story. That's a real thing you can do.

[Eric]

No, that's a good.

[Taylor]

That might be a good one. All right, maybe that, Maybe I'll do that.

[Lyle]

Yeah. You're okay, man. Don't worry about yourself.

[Eric]

Appreciate it, bro.

[Lyle]

Honestly, it. I. It's honestly more of a waste of time that you called me than that you spent five hours jerking off with this thing.

[Taylor]

Well, you know, honestly, I was about to go to bed and I saw the phone ring and I was like, no way. I've been watching these guys clips for years. I'm so happy you can help me with like a real thing that's actually happening. You know, I feel like a lot of people probably come on this and like, make some up, but like, no, I. I jerked off five times today.

[Lyle]

You're saying it like, like it's an incredible, rare, unique thing that you couldn't possibly be making up.

[Taylor]

No, dude, I got to talk. I gotta. I got to Talk to the therapy gecko about the pocket I bought in Tokyo.

[Lyle]

You bought this pocket? You bought this pocket from a gachapon machine?

[Taylor]

No, no, that was the first one. That's what introduced me to it.

[Eric]

And then I got.

[Taylor]

Then I, like, bought a real one. Same store, good store. I mean, it's kind of a trip, like, because I feel like a lot of. A lot of Japan's kind of, like, super, like, you know, super modest. Maybe like more outside of Tokyo. But, like, you go into the sex store, it's just like. Just tons of dudes and suits right off of work, and they're all just, like, looking at porn pocket and super casual. And, like, no one's even batting an eye at it, which is like.

[Lyle]

No, I've. Dude, I've been to this store that you're talking about.

[Taylor]

It's all with the green sign, right?

[Lyle]

I don't.

[Taylor]

I. I think there's a couple of them, though.

[Lyle]

That's the thing. There's a couple of them. So I don't know if I've been to this specific one. Did you see the. Okay, if you think that Gotcha Pond machine. Did you see the period blood panties Gachapon machine?

[Taylor]

No, but I saw Panties Gotcha. Gotcha machine.

[Lyle]

They all have the panties Gotcha machine. But there was one that is, like, that really. That really freaked me out. I. I spoiled. I don't know if it freaked me out, because I saw it and I was like, there's no way that these are like. Like. Like, the gut, like, it says it's real. Yeah, there's. There's no way. It's. Yeah, it's got to be like. Yeah, food coloring or whatever. The.

[Taylor]

Yeah, I don't. Yeah, I don't really buy that. I mean, but, like, also, they're pretty. They're obviously pretty good at, like, recreating things because they have, like. They have like, all those, like, scent smells, but it's like. It's like woman's armpit, and it's like. I don't know who really wants that, but I guess they know what a woman's armpit smells like. Or, like, at least a certain person, and they. They started selling it. So I don't know. They're pretty good at creating this shit, I guess.

[Lyle]

Wait, they. Wait. They created the artificial smell of a woman's armpit?

[Taylor]

Of a woman's armpit? Yeah, they have, like.

[Lyle]

What was the product?

[Taylor]

Like, Perf. It's like a perfume. It's like a spray. They, like, have it at the sex

[Lyle]

Store, there's a perfume that you can spray that smells like a woman's armpit.

[Taylor]

Yeah. If you're. I mean, if you're into that, obviously.

[Lyle]

Interesting.

[Taylor]

Yeah, I got a lot of cool stuff here, man. You know, there's something for everyone.

[Lyle]

Yeah. They also have sushi.

[Taylor]

Oh, yeah. I went to revolving sushi bar last night. That was pretty lit. That was my second time going.

[Eric]

Very cool.

[Lyle]

What do you have planned for the rest of the trip? Dude, I don't know.

[Taylor]

I'm kind of just gonna play. Yeah, well, I'm gonna try not to as much because, you know, I'm gonna look at it more now from the. I only have three days left, so I'll probably, you know, rip the bullet train up to Fuji tomorrow.

[Eric]

Hopefully.

[Lyle]

I might tell you something, just so you know, just before we leave. If you do just. I just want you to do this for me. If you do end up spending your next three days inside the hotel room jerking off, just don't, like, if that's what you do, right, like, protect. I don't think you should do that. I think you should go to Mount Fuji instead and, like, do the real stuff.

[Eric]

Yeah.

[Lyle]

But if that's what you end up doing, just embrace it. Don't fight it. Because if you fight because. Yeah, spend. Because here's the thing. It's how you look at it, right? If you said to me, I went to Japan and I bought this all great pocket pussy, and I had an amazing experience in Japan sitting in a, you know, my hotel room, jerking off for three days straight, and you really, like, sold it as, like, it was a great ex. Like, it was like something like. Like, it was like an Airbnb experience that you intended. Yeah.

[Taylor]

I feel like that's also probably authentic.

[Lyle]

Yeah. If you. If you. Yeah, it's authentic. I mean, that's what the locals do is they jerk off. Yeah.

[Eric]

Yeah.

[Lyle]

That's the local experience.

[Taylor]

Some people.

[Eric]

Yeah.

[Taylor]

Anywhere.

[Lyle]

Yeah. So if you did it and then you really sold it as like, I went to Japan, I had the local experience of buying a pocket pussy from this place where you said the Japanese salarymen are. This is where the locals go to buy their pocket pussy. I bought the local pocket pussy. And I. And I. And I did as the locals do everywhere in the world, which is to sit at home and jerk off. And you were. You really kind of sold it as like, I went and I had an authentic experience. That's what you should do. Just if you. So if you do it, do that and don't Be like, oh, I spent this. Don't make it like it was a bummer. You know what I mean? Like, when you tell people about.

[Eric]

Yeah.

[Lyle]

Really sell it. Like. Like, make them think that you are. Had a great time doing that and also have a good time.

[Eric]

Yeah.

[Lyle]

If that's what you're going to do.

[Taylor]

Well, I think that's. I think that's also just, like, good. Yeah, no, that's just good advice in general, because I think I'm more of a pessimist, and I think, like, reframing things is something I need to get better at, you know, just like, general, like, other aspects of my life. But I like that, you know, I'm gonna. I'm not saying I will, but if I do, I'm gonna be very happy that I. Yeah. Jerked off some more in Japan, you know?

[Lyle]

Yeah. If you do it, just, you know, embrace it. All right, Taylor.

[Taylor]

Yeah.

[Eric]

Yep.

[Lyle]

Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?

[Taylor]

You know, I guess don't be. Don't be ashamed of touching wiener guys.

[Lyle]

But you didn't really. You just. You touched it with the pocket. You didn't even touch it.

[Taylor]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't be afraid of using a pocket. I guess. I don't know. They're pretty good. Go try one. Great, great, great experience.

[Lyle]

Okay. All right, dude.

[Taylor]

Thank you. Appreciate you.

[Lyle]

All right, see you later, man. Sayonara.

[Taylor]

Peace out. Sayonara, man.

[Lyle]

See you. Sayonara, bro. Sayonara, broski. I really do believe that, you know, if you want to have it all, people get so hung up about, like, having, like, local experiences, and, like, you know, they're like, oh, I don't want to do the touristy thing when I go to the place. Right. If you really. When you're traveling and any Europe or Asia or America, if you really want to have the local experience and you don't want to do the touristy stuff, just go home, do what this guy did, go to the gas station, get a snack, and then go home and jerk off. That's what most people are doing in most places. So if you want to have a local experience, that's what you should do.

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[Eric]

hello?

[Lyle]

Hello?

[Eric]

Is this Lyle?

[Lyle]

Yeah, who is this?

[Eric]

Fuck. What the fuck? Are you live?

[Lyle]

Uh, I mean I'm. I'm. I'm live enough. What's your Name?

[Eric]

My name's Eric.

[Lyle]

Eric. Well, well, well. Eric, Eric, Eric. Like Eric Adams, the mayor of New York. Or he was the mayor of New York, now he's not.

[Eric]

Yeah, Eric Cartman.

[Lyle]

Eric Cartman. Popular character from the beloved south park cartoon. Eric Ostro. That's the name of a guy I went to high school with. Old friend of mine. Shout out Eric if you're listening. Let's keep going. Eric from that 70s show. Eric, the architect of Flatbush Zombies. He was on the show a few years ago. Shout out Eric. You want to throw one in there? Throw one in there. Do it.

[Eric]

I think you got them all.

[Lyle]

Oh, no. Throw it in there. Come on, don't be shy. Anyone. It doesn't matter. Their name doesn't even have to be Eric. Just throw anyone in there. Name that. Name. Anyone. Just name someone. Come on, it's easy.

[Eric]

I'm kind of nervous. I'm drawing a blank.

[Lyle]

Anyone. Just. Anyway, there's no wrong answers. Name. You can name someone that doesn't exist. How about this? All right, I'll do two. All right, I'll do two more. I'll do two more. Bill Clinton. You don't have anyone?

[Eric]

Like how?

[Lyle]

Sure. Everything count, rules. Who cares about anything?

[Eric]

Can I use myself?

[Lyle]

Yeah. Yes. Yes, you can. Yes, you absolutely can. Perfect. Go ahead. Perfect. You're Eric yourself. You're a person. You're alive, Eric. What made you want to call me to that?

[Eric]

I guess I've been listening to your show for a while. Like a few years. I've always wanted a call, but I don't know, I guess I've just. I never really thought, like I'd be one of those people that does the thing, you know? I guess.

[Lyle]

Okay.

[Eric]

But here I am.

[Lyle]

Okay, what's. Who are you, Eric? What's your life like?

[Eric]

My life's kind of weird, I guess.

[Lyle]

Why is it weird?

[Eric]

Well, I guess I've kind of been going on somewhat of a roller coaster of relationships the past couple years. Been kind of a wild ride. Not gonna lie.

[Lyle]

One single relationship or these. Or did you say multiple relationships?

[Eric]

More than one. I guess I. Last year got out of a seven year relationship that was kind of. That was kind of rough. But I guess I kind of knew deep down that, you know, it wasn't really going to be like for the long haul and like after that long, it's kind of like, you know, you got to make a decision. So I guess the decision was made.

[Lyle]

And what led you to the decision that you made?

[Eric]

I guess we, like. I guess he was a really great guy, but it just kind of ended up being, like, we were never really super intimate. And like I said, he was a really great guy, but I guess I. I needed something more. We ended up opening up our relationship, and then I met someone else. Or I guess we did. We both did. And, yeah, this is why I say kind of a crazy roller coaster, because things developed, and I guess we ended up breaking up, and then I ended up getting with the person.

[Lyle]

So you got the. You got the third boyfriend in the divorce.

[Eric]

I mean, I guess this person wasn't really the third boyfriend because it was actually a couple.

[Lyle]

Oh, okay. This. You know what? Sometimes people show up here and they're like, oh, life's been a roller coaster and whatnot. But I believe you that things have been a roller coaster. This is fascinating. Okay, so you and your boyfriend open up the relationship, and you guys get with a couple?

[Eric]

Yeah, yeah, we. We hooked up with a couple.

[Lyle]

You hooked up with a couple, but then you're. And then how. Okay, so how. Tell me about how it went from you and your boyfriend, like, basically swinging with this couple to then you. Are you. So are you walking away with the cup? Are you in a polycule now, or are you just with one of the people?

[Eric]

So, not. Not a polycule, but I guess I became their third.

[Lyle]

Oh,

[Eric]

yeah.

[Lyle]

Okay, so this is more like you guys became. You guys were swinging, so you became a quad, and then your boyfriend left, and now it's a tricycle.

[Eric]

No, that. That. That's not exactly the sequence of events.

[Lyle]

Okay, I guess.

[Eric]

I guess we. We broke up. Um, it was a really kind of messy situation. Um, what actually ended up happening was one of the guys in the couple. I guess my. My. My ex, like, kind of started, like, falling for, like, I could, like, tell, like, that, like, when we went out and did stuff that hang out. My brother's getting home. I'm going to go to my car. One second.

[Lyle]

Yeah, this is a good senior car to talk about situation.

[Eric]

Right? So he ended up, like, kind of.

[Lyle]

Sorry, go ahead, go ahead.

[Eric]

I've talked to a lot of people about this, like, in my life, and, yeah, it's pretty. It's pretty interesting situation to say the least. But so, yeah, I. My ex ended up kind of falling in love with this guy. And I could tell, like, he wouldn't say so much, but I could tell, like, we would go out and we do stuff. Like, we went to this kind of like, an arcade. It's called Round One. They have a bunch of crane machines. Huh?

[Lyle]

I said, I know. Round one. Isn't that a Japanese.

[Eric]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's fucking cute as shit. It's like they got crane machines with, like, all these, like, super cute plushies.

[Lyle]

Do they have them in the States?

[Eric]

Yeah, I mean, I'm in America too. Like, I live in. I don't know how much I should review about myself, but I. I live in one of the 50 states. Yeah. Anyways, so, like, the guy, like, the guy, the one of the guys in the couple, he won me a, like, stuffed animal and one of the crane machines. And my ex, like, got kind of jealous and, like, snatched it from me. Like, we took a picture and, like, he held the plushie in the picture, stuff like that. Like. But the thing that really kind of was, like, the nail in the coffin was eventually, and, like, we're all bears. So, like, you know, we snore and fucking have CPAP machines. Or I guess one of us did.

[Lyle]

Wait, you all have CPAP machines?

[Eric]

No, no, no. I was gonna say we all snore, but, like, one of us has a CPAP machine. Yeah, the. The. I guess the guy in question has a CPAP machine. But anyways, like, so, like, my part, my ex, he did not have a CPAP machine. He would snore and, like, he'd sometimes talk in his sleep. And he started saying this guy's name in his sleep. And it kind of got to the point where he was saying it, like, every night, and, like, I couldn't sleep in the same bed as him. And he would deny it. And it's really heartbreaking because, like, you know, like, I could tell he kind of didn't want to, like. Like, he still, like, wanted to be with me. Like, at least that's what he was saying. I kind of found out towards the end of that relationship that there was a lot of stuff that he, like, he would say, but I wouldn't really know if it was true or not. You know, like, our whole intimacy issue thing. Like, I think he just didn't really, like, I mean, I know there's people out there, like. And like, I guess, excuse me if I get vulgar, but, you know, like, there's people out there that, like, have different preferences. Like, I know fucking, like, DJ Khalid doesn't eat pussy, you know, so it's like there's, like, you know, different out there. But, like, that. That was the main problem for me because it didn't ever really seem like he was, like, into that at least, like, doing it to me, you know, so yeah, like, there was a lot of stuff about that relationship that I feel like it was just kind of like, brushed under the rug because, like, he wanted to be. Like, he. Like, towards the end, we ended up getting a dog. And like, again, we. We were together for like, seven fucking years. So, like, those. Those were, I guess, some of the last attempts to kind of like, keep us, you know, together. And that shit was really heartbreaking too. Like, I fucking missed that dog, man. Like, fuck. But anyways, I guess back to, like, what I was saying. So when that ended up happening, we broke up. Like, when the sleep talking thing ended up happening and he was trying to get a CPAP machine, because that would have helped with that. He would have, like, you know, probably not talked as much in his sleep, you know, but that wouldn't have solved the problem, you know, that wouldn't have. Like, I still kind of knew what I knew, and I kind of had to, like, figure out what I wanted to do. So we ended up breaking up and I did end up getting with this couple. And things were great at first. They were also open. We started out kind of, I guess, like, you know, like being together, but like, also like, you know, like having other people come in. And I guess, like, I was only really used to, like, you know, close relationship, like, you know, like, kind of like intimate type situations. And like, so we dated a total of six months. We did break up. We actually broke up a week ago. But yeah, like, it kind of got overwhelming for me. Like, it got to the point where, like, you know, not all the people that we would have over, like, you know, it's like there's three of us, so it's like, it's hard to find somebody that's like, good for, like, all three of us, I guess, in the couple. One of the. One of the guys he likes kind of like twinks and like, me and the other guy, like, we like bears. So there's like, some conflict of interest there, you know. Like, we're not always going to, like, find the right people, you know. But yeah, it got to the point where I was kind of like, I guess I was like, you know, like, I kind of just want to spend time with, like, you guys, you know. Like, I don't really want to, like, invite, you know, some fucking person over to do stuff with or hang out with and then do stuff with or whatever, you know, like, they were respecting it at first. Like, they're like, okay, like, we'll take some time. There was one thing that really fucked shit up for me, though, I kind of asked a question that I probably should not have asked because, like I said, I was. I was really getting in my feels for these guys, and I guess I still kind of am. We're broken up, but I actually just got back from their place to. To my brother's apartment where I'm currently staying.

[Lyle]

Wait, you're broken up, but you just got back from there? I have so many questions for you about the situation. You're broken up, but you just got back from their place?

[Eric]

Yeah. Yeah, it's. It's not healthy.

[Lyle]

Did you leave something there or what were you doing?

[Eric]

I. I was. I was seeing them. We were seeing each other. There's. There's still feelings there. We still care about each other, and we still.

[Lyle]

Guys ever do, like, a human centipede type of thing?

[Eric]

We've. We've done some stuff. Honestly, they're the ones kind of exposing me to this because, like, this is new to me, kind of that's, you know, why things kind of didn't work out or. I don't know. I don't know if I kind of hope. Like, I guess, like, we lived together for six months. Like, I lived in their house, and they were always around. And I mean, it's like I. After we broke up, like, I kind of, like, put all the cards on the table. I was just like. Like, you know, like, I really want to get back together. Like, I miss you guys. I just being able to talk to you guys about anything and everything. But, yeah, like, so we're still seeing each other, but, yeah, we broke up. And the reason we broke up is because, like I said, I ended up asking this question that was really fucking stupid of me because.

[Lyle]

What was?

[Eric]

I mean, when we met, we were open. Yeah, I'm about to say, like, when we met, we were open. Like, you know, I was open with my ex, and they were open, and, like, when we got together, we were open. In the middle of the relationship, I got the fucking inkling that asked this question that if it came between being open and being with me, which one would they pick? And they kind of told me in not so many words that they would pick being open.

[Lyle]

Okay. Why is it so horrible that you asked that question? You kind of. You basically hinted at, like, closing the open relationship.

[Eric]

Yeah, I'm realizing that now. I never really, like, because, like, I'm a very agreeable guy. Like, I don't want to make anybody do anything they don't want to do. I don't want to, like, force, like, that's why. I guess I kind of asked it like that, you know, because it was just kind of testing the waters, you know, I kind of just wanted them to say they would pick me, and, like, I kind of knew, you know, but, like, it was mostly a thing of just, like, I just wanted to feel like. I just wanted to know my place in this fucking situation, you know, you were.

[Lyle]

You were kind of asking a question you knew the answer to.

[Eric]

Yeah, I kind of did know the answer to it. I mean, we had been doing stuff, you know, they. They. They have, like a. They have, like, a fucking network of, like, friends, you know, that they know in that way. I don't. Like, that's something I've been struggling with. Like, I've been trying, especially now that I'm single, to, like, you know, like, I'm. I'm on the fucking apps, like, among fucking. I know it's probably different for straight people.

[Lyle]

I like the way. I like the way that you said. You said it's a network.

[Eric]

It is. It is. Like, they have friends. We. We even had mutual friends, like, when I had met people when I was single that they are now friends with and that they, like. It is a net. I mean, it's like the gay community is a network of people. I mean, it's like, you know, like, you know. But so, yeah, I asked that question, and that was the start of, like, all of the problems after that question. I guess it kind of. I guess they kind of felt like it fell on them to kind of prove to me that, like, I am important, you know, and I would just kind of keep, like, not, like, needing more, but, like, kind of, like, I would express that it would make me more comfortable, you know, like, if we, like, kind of, like, didn't, like, do stuff with other people, but, like, all of these friends that they had were, like, you know, like, people that, you know, they hooked up with. So, like, we would, like, in order for us to hang out with people, like, it was like the door was always kind of open, and they didn't want to, like, tell these people either, you know, that, like, I didn't want to. Like, it was like, nobody wants, like, you know, anyone's feelings to get hurt or upset or whatever. The. So it just kind of ended up being this, like, disaster of, like, these situations where, like, things would kind of, like, sort of seem to start happening, and then, like, I would kind of shut down, like, because I knew it was what they wanted, but I didn't really want to do that. I Just wanted to do stuff with them, you know. And like I said, it's just what I'm used to. Like, I just got out of a seven year closed relationship, you know. And I mean, I guess I won't lie, like, it was open. Like there was a time in the beginning kind of when it was open because we've always had those intimacy issues, me and my ex. But like, there was a time in the beginning where it was open. And there's a time at the end where it was open and nothing really happened in the beginning part. But like at the end part, that was when we started. Like when I started kind of like, you know, doing stuff and making moves. But anyway, so all that shit happened. It kind of just kept. It kept getting worse. Like we kept fighting. And then like last Saturday, I guess it was, it. It was started on like, I think it was like Thursday. We got into an argument about it. We were like talking about closing it. I knew that the time was coming, or, sorry, opening it. I knew that the time was coming where we were going to open it because we kind of temporarily closed it. And so like, I was kind of like throwing the towel. I very much had the attitude of kind of like, who gives a shit? You know, like, they just kind of like want this and like, you know it's going to happen like, regardless. And like, I think that that attitude kind of like permeated everything and like, you know, like it started getting the point where they're getting angry. And so, yeah, we had a fight on Thursday last week, and then Saturday came around and there's like an event that we go to at this club. It's like a gear event. So, you know, people wear like, you know, harnesses and you know, like, you know, the gear and. And like, I guess it has themes. And so the theme for last week, it was construction workers. And so like when I got home from work, I noticed like that they like had both bought vests, like to go out. They hadn't bought me one. So that already was kind of like, what? What's going on?

[Lyle]

Oh, no, they didn't buy you. They were going to the. They were going to the Swingers event without you?

[Eric]

Yeah, I mean, well, they, they had told me like, I guess so the game Pocopia had just come out and they're like, oh, you probably like, you just got that game, you probably want to play that or whatever.

[Lyle]

And I was like, oh my, no,

[Eric]

what a bummer, dude.

[Lyle]

But yeah, we're telling you that. They were like, you got It. You should stay home and play the new video game you bought.

[Eric]

Yeah.

[Lyle]

Sucks. God damn.

[Eric]

Well, it's. I mean, I guess in their defense, like, whenever we went out, you know, like, stuff would happen and like, I would just kind of like, you know, get a little bummed because, like, I, you know, like, they. We'd meet somebody and then like, like, I'm honestly new to going out to clubs. Like, I never did that in my past relationship. And like, I kind of was hoping that they would kind of like, hold my hand a little bit through the process. I don't know. Like, I kept telling them I thought things would be different, you know, Like, I thought when we went out that, like, you know, like, if we, we were gonna like, flirt or, you know, talk to people, that we would do it together. That like, I don't know, like, it just got to the point where like, like we would talk to people and like, you know, like, they would be like, super into the conversation and like, I would just kind of feel like a wallflower. I guess so, like. But yeah, that was, I guess, the reason for that. I guess. Like, right now we're kind of trying to like, see if like, we can like, get back to that point. But like this past week, they've been hooking up with people, I've been hooking up with people, and they don't want to talk to me about it, I guess because they just think I'm too sensitive about it. Like, I tell them, like, you know, I'll talk about it with you guys. I'm used to talking about everything with you guys, you know, but like, they don't want to talk to me about it. And so I don't want it to be one sided. So I'm just like, okay, I guess we're not talking about these things, but

[Lyle]

so, I mean, so. So are you. Are you like equally in love with both of these guys? Or are you like, is. Do you like one over the other or. They're. They. They kind of function as a unit to you.

[Eric]

So I mean, I can say that I do love both of them. Like we have. I mean, at least they, they have sex with me. Like both of them. And in the, in the last six months, like, like we would have sex like every, every night. You know, like, it was beautiful. Like, I, I was really happy. I mean, there were things that obviously were bothering me, but like, I always would tell myself, like, the pros outweighed the cons, you know, because, like, that's something that I wasn't getting in my last relationship, like, at all, you know, So I don't know. I kind of justified it in my head that way. But, like, I said, things just kind of got to the point where it was just like, you know, and so. Yeah, I guess, like, going back to that. The argument, like. Yeah, I mean, I guess there's not really much more to say about that. I don't. I don't think. I don't know if they're ever gonna listen to this. I don't want to. Like, I don't want to talk them too much because I still love them and I think they still love me. I mean, they said that, but I don't really know. But yeah, basically something horrible. Like, I said something. I said something disrespectful. And because they were basically throwing me out, they're like, what did you say?

[Lyle]

What did you. What disrespectful thing did you say?

[Eric]

I don't want to say, to be honest, because it, Like, I don't. Like, it really hurt the one of the guys. And, like, it's not really important. Like, it was something that I said that was just mean because, like, he was basically screaming at me at that point. Like, he was like, if you're not happy, then, like, get your. And leave. And I just, you know, I said something disrespectful, like, in response.

[Lyle]

So, Eric, so. So where are you at now? Are you single? Are you in a different polycule? Where are you at now?

[Eric]

I mean, it's a. I'm single. I guess they're. They're still together, but I guess they're open. I think that they told me yesterday when I came over that they. They still want things to work with us. So. I mean that. Happy, you know?

[Lyle]

So what do you. So. So wait, so, Eric, so. So what do you. What do you want? Like, do you want to be and do you want, like, a forever boyfriend type of deal? Do you want to be in a polycule? Like, what do you. What do you want, man?

[Eric]

I don't fucking know. Like, I don't know what I'm doing here in life. Like, I'm just here. Like, I. I want to have what we had. Like, it was beautiful. Like, I just. When we broke up, like, I realized, like, I don't give a shit, like, about that, you know, like, that they want to hook up with other people. Like, as long as I can still have, like, what we had, like, I don't care. At least for right now.

[Lyle]

Do you feel like that? But do you feel Like, I mean, these guys, they went to a construction worker party and, and threw a Pokemon game at you and said, go play with that. You know? Do you feel like they. They fuck with you in the way that you fuck with them? Because that's important.

[Eric]

I don't know. I mean, I think so. Like, I lived with them for six months. Like, they gave me a key to their house. Like, I slept in their bed every single night. You know, we had sex every single night. I don't know. Like, I've never had that before, you know? Like, I don't know. Like, I just. I miss it, you know, I miss, like, talking to them about, like, everything. Like, you know, my fears, my goals, my dreams. Like, I. I just. I. I'm. I'm like, just yearning for that again. Like, I. I don't know. I don't know what I want, you know, like, obviously I'm very used to something different, you know.

[Lyle]

Okay, let me ask you something. And maybe I'm being assumptive here, but. And actually, man, you can educate me if I. About this. It seems to me that, like, would. Is it true that in the gay community. All right, like, you're a bear, right? Like, yeah. Are there not. Are there not like. Like an infinite number of, like, other guys out there that are like a swipe away that you could go and connect with?

[Eric]

That's what I've. That's what I've been doing. But, like, I mean, I still fucking miss them. Like, there's like that. That's what I told them too, through text this past week. Like, you know, like, I've been trying to distract myself and like, it feels good in the moment, but like, after, I'm like back in my feelings again, you know?

[Lyle]

You haven't developed feelings for anyone else that you've met on any of the. Your, Your advent, your grinder vet life?

[Eric]

It's only been a week.

[Lyle]

It's only been a week. Well, you got to give it more than. How many. How many of these. How many of these guys in a week? How many more dudes in a week?

[Eric]

I mean, I've. I've met like three or four people,

[Lyle]

dude, in one week.

[Eric]

I'm hurting, man. I'm. I'm.

[Lyle]

No, no, no, no. I'm not saying that. No, no, I'm not saying that like it's a bad thing. I'm saying that in, like. I'm amazed by that way. That's pretty good. That's pretty good. Four dudes in one week, dude.

[Eric]

You know, the gay community Is very sexually repressed.

[Lyle]

That. That's exciting. That's very exciting, bro. Give it some time. Give it some time, man. I mean, if you're meeting four. If you're able to get four dates a week, you know, like, you know what? Listen, sex dates, whatever. You're. You're meeting new people. You're meeting new people. Let's call it that. We can say that with confidence. You're meeting new people, okay? Whether you're meeting them over dinner or over, you know, them blowing you, it's. It's. You're meeting them. That could be the date, you know?

[Eric]

Yeah.

[Lyle]

That's okay.

[Eric]

Yeah. I don't know, man.

[Lyle]

But you're still. You're meeting all these new people. And I think that over time, you kind of probably have tricked yourself into believing that this is the only connection that you will have for a long time. But it sounds to me like you're having no problem putting yourself out there meeting new people. And so I'm sure that by natural way of you living your life, you will find new connections. It might take a very long time, and it might still. It'll still be difficult, but I believe that you have no problem putting yourself out there. And so youo should totally have the faith that you will find new connections out in the world and not. And, you know, and you don't want to settle for these guys. Listen, these guys. I don't know, man. I don't know anything about these guys. I don't. I've never met him. I only know what you. But it sounds like they're not, you know, they're. They, they. They really didn't choose you, you know, they really didn't choose you, and you don't want to be with people who aren't choosing you, you know?

[Eric]

Yeah, I mean, I feel like they did, but in their own way. Like, it's just like. I don't know. Like, I get what you're saying. I do. Like, and, like, you know, but it's like. It's like one of those things where it's like, I don't. Like, I could hold out for, like. I guess like something like. Like perfect.

[Taylor]

Perfect.

[Eric]

But, like, I. Like, this was.

[Lyle]

Hold on. What do you mean? But no, it wasn't. What do you mean, perfect?

[Eric]

I mean, it was perfect. Just the one thing.

[Lyle]

But, dude, they, they, they. But it's not perfect. They wanted an open thing, and you did not. That's a very.

[Eric]

I don't know, like.

[Lyle]

Dude, it's not like. It's like they're snoring and you're like, well, it's not something, you know, but it's like, this is. That's a big thing, whether or not they want to. Not only. Not only that, but also the fact that they. They didn't even want you to, like, really be a part of their. Because that's like, they're a couple, right? Like, they're. They seem to be a unit of each other, all right? Who knows what's going on in their dynamic? But they seemed like they. They. They weren't keen to add you in. And I'm sorry for the tough, you know, love here, but listen, you. They didn't. They didn't want to add you into the couple. You were a member.

[Eric]

They did of.

[Lyle]

Of the swing.

[Eric]

It was just. It was like a vote kind of. And like, it was two against one, you know?

[Lyle]

Who were the two?

[Eric]

I was their boyfriend. I mean, they were the two. I was their boyfriend.

[Lyle]

And then who was the one with them?

[Eric]

I was the one.

[Lyle]

So they did. So listen, man. They. They didn't let you join their polycule. And it's. Listen, here's the thing. I'm gonna start. I'm gonna. Dude. But dude, these guys. And look, you. You know, these guys, whatever, you've been in the bed with them and had the feelings and been there, but, like, dude, these two guys, like, they have their couple thing going on, right? And they have their adventures where they go to the construction workers sex party shit, right? And you, You. It sounds a little like you were, you know, part of their adventure and part of their thing. But you're not. You're not in the main club. And it might not. And listen. And listen. You're not, but you're not the main club. But it's not. It doesn't have anything. You shouldn't take it as a personal reflection of who you are, right? You're just not in the main club. And so there might not be enough room in the main club. It might. They. There might only in most of these fucking things. Like, there's only room for two in the club. And so for them, it might be like, listen, we want to be in a couple. Like, we're. We love. We. We have enough bandwidth for each other and then peripheral people on the peripheral to be in the club. It sounds like you wanted to be in, like a whole ass polycule, but they were kind of keeping you on the peripheral. And you know that that is what it is what it is, but, like, it just sounds like they don't have the bandwidth and, like, you could sit there and, like, be on the peripheral of their club, but it's just not. It's. This. This situation is just not working for you, man, and you know it's not working for you, so just, like, whatever, like, you can. You can keep fucking these guys if you want. That's fine. But, like, keep fucking these guys. But, like. But the things are open, man. So, like, keep fucking these guys, but stay on Grindr, stay on feels, stay on all the apps and, like, keep meeting people. Keep putting yourself out there. And who fucking know. You don't know. You haven't met all the. All the. All the gay guys in whatever fucking state you live in. Yeah, so you don't know. You don't know what the fuck is out there. So listen, man, just keep putting yourself out there. If you really want to keep fucking these guys, then. Then fuck these guys as much as you want. Who cares? And. But in the meantime, keep putting yourself out there and try to make yourself emotionally available to, you know, other people that may or may not come into your orbit, you know, but, like, don't. But. Don't. Don't but these guys. But, like, don't fucking sit here and, like, wait for these dudes who didn't, like, who, you know, didn't want you to come with them to the. To the orgy, you know, that's what you want someone who wants you with. You want someone who wants you with them at the orgy. Okay?

[Eric]

So it's all.

[Lyle]

So if you really want.

[Eric]

Things had gone like.

[Sponsor Voice]

It's like.

[Eric]

The thing is, like, what I was trying to explain was that, like, I'm getting used to this new kind of, like. Like living like this, you know? Like, it's something I've not. Like, I'm only used to this context, being single, you know? Like, I'm only used to, like, random. Random people hooking up, like, being, like, a single person. I wasn't used to it in a relationship when I have feelings for somebody, and it's something that I'm kind of, like, trying to adjust. I. I do want to keep an open mind. I. I guess it scares me that they might be wanting to keep an open mind because, like, I do love them, you know, But I get what you're saying. I do. And, like, I've talked to this, like, to, like, everybody, like, in my direct life, and, like, they've told me the same thing, you know, They've told me, like. Like. Like it's different, you know? Like, it's it's different. Like, I. It's awkward. It was awkward telling people, like, you know, like, I have two boyfriends.

[Lyle]

Yeah, yeah. Yeah. That's not. That's not what we're talking. We're not talking. Yeah, but that's not what we're talking about, you know, that's not really what we're talking. We're not talking about how weird. We're not talking about, like, the. The weirdness or not of the polycule. We're just talking about, like, kind of normal relationship dynamics in the context of this abnormal relationship that you have found yourself in. So, like, listen, if this was one guy, right, and the guy. And the one dude didn't want to be in a relationship with you, but wanted to do all this is, like, a weird thing that it's just, like, not the thing to be holding out for. Whether or not it's one guy or two guys, you know, they don't want you in the relationship. So, like, don't fucking, like, hold out. Don't keep holding out. Just, like, go live. Go live your life, Eric. So. Eric, listen, just because we're talking in circles here.

[Eric]

No, I get what you say. It's valid, you know, like, okay, I deserve. Yeah, yeah. I'm okay. I'm just. I'm hitting my day.

[Lyle]

I'm crying.

[Eric]

No, I felt like I'm crying. No, I'm not crying, man. I'm good. I'm good. I have been going through a lot of emotions this last week, but I'm not crying right now. I'm like. It's been good. Like, it was. I didn't even know if they wanted to see me. I didn't even know if they wanted to still make things work. That was something that they said yesterday, and I was like, well, like, so do I.

[Lyle]

You know?

[Eric]

So.

[Lyle]

Eric, I'm gonna. I'll. I'll let. I'll let this be the final thing before we get out of here, but, like, just. Just to reiterate, listen, if you want to keep these guys, keep these guys. But don't stop other guys, you know, because they're other guys.

[Eric]

Yeah.

[Lyle]

So you should. Other guys and, you know, whatever. Like, all the guys you want. And then, you know, eventually, the journey of all the guys you want and being. Living the full unapolog. Unapologetic life of Eric, I think will lead you to whatever it is that you do truly want. So that's my two cents, Eric.

[Eric]

Now that. That I know. I know that's, like, what I should do. And it's what I've been doing, I guess. It's obviously, it's still very fresh, but it's what I've been doing. Yeah, I guess. Yeah.

[Taylor]

Hello?

[Lyle]

Yeah, go ahead.

[Eric]

There was something that I wanted to ask you. I didn't know if I would ever like call crazy because I guess this is fake because I. I didn't call more than once. I just called once and then, you know, I got on. But I guess, like, I'm sure you probably. I don't know if you play Pokemon or not, but I guess I have a shiny Trico that I would love to give to you.

[Lyle]

I. That's very, very sweet of you, but I have no way to take your shiny Treecko. I'm not a Pokemon guy. I don't like. Dude, Pokemon without like, I don't. Pokemon's like a rp Turn based. Like it's. I know it's like the most popular thing ever, but I'm not like that big into number. Yeah, turn based RPGs. But the Poketopia shit, that, it does look kind of cool. But it's. It's not something I would ever really play or get into. I'm not a big Pokemon, dude. I don't even know. Like, I look back at when I was a kid and I'm like, how the fuck did I play this? Like, it doesn't. It's. It's kind of complicated for like a. Like a kid, you know.

[Eric]

That's what I love about numbers. Like it has something for kids, but it's also like something like. That's the shit that keeps it interesting. Like, you know, like when you get older, you know.

[Lyle]

Eric, is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?

[Eric]

Oh, man, I have no idea. I guess gay bears out there listening. I'm single,

[Lyle]

dude. All the gay bears listening. Please go. This guy. I endorse fucking this guy. Who is on the phone. Doris, if you're a gay bear, I endorse making a comment on the Spotify comments and saying, hey, here's my email address. If you're Eric and you're listening, you know, feel free to message me and we'll have sex. I endorse that happening for you.

[Eric]

Thank you for your endorsement.

[Bella]

Of course.

[Lyle]

Thank you, Eric. Have a good rest of the night.

[Eric]

You too.

[Lyle]

Bye, Eric.

[Eric]

Bye. Bye.

[Lyle]

And hey, maybe after, maybe after you and Eric have sex, he can give you that shiny Treecko.

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[Lyle]

hello.

[Bella]

Hi.

[Lyle]

Hello. What's your name?

[Bella]

My name's Bella.

[Lyle]

What's up, Bella? How's life?

[Bella]

So crazy. I saw your little posting, and I woke straight up out of sleep. I was like, I'm a stand calm. See if he sees.

[Lyle]

So you were asleep just now?

[Bella]

Yeah, I was. I was out and I woke up, went on Instagram, saw your little post. I was like, let's try, because I haven't actually tried to call you, but I have been listening to your podcast for a really long time.

[Lyle]

Oh, fuck, yeah. Thank you, Bella. Well, now that we're connected, was there anything in particular you wanted to talk about today?

[Bella]

Well, I feel like the only interesting thing to talk about was that I work with rats.

[Lyle]

You work with rats? Do you? Do you. But now, do you by chance work in an arcade that serves pizza?

[Bella]

No, I don't. They're not cute rats like those.

[Lyle]

Do you by chance work in a lab that tests various medical cosmetic products?

[Bella]

No, because then they'd still be pretty rats, right?

[Lyle]

Oh, no. Okay. What kind of rats are you working with here?

[Bella]

So think of, like, a rat farm.

[Lyle]

A rat farm?

[Bella]

Yeah, like a. So it's like a facility where we grow up the rats from kinkies, which are babies, and then mice and then. Wait, no, I lied. Fuzzies. And then lean and then small, and then medium, and then medium large and then large and then mammoth and then colossal. So they all go to, like. They're for reptile feeders and stuff. And then some people buy them for pets.

[Lyle]

Oh, so you breed them to be eaten by snakes?

[Bella]

Snakes and coatamundis and whatever other stuff people have to feed them, too.

[Lyle]

Does it ever. Do you ever feel bad for the rats because, you know that you're birthing them for the sole purpose of being eaten as food?

[Bella]

No, not really. Because they're, like. So they're, like, super emotional creatures, which, I guess, in theory, if you say that. Yeah, maybe I'm. Maybe. Maybe I feel a little bad about it, but they're super. They get treated with a lot of, like, respect before they gotta go. So it's not like we're torturing them. So it's like they don't know what's coming. So maybe it's a bummer. Maybe it's a little up.

[Lyle]

Do you have a lot of respect for rats in general?

[Bella]

I don't think I could if I worked here, because I see so many die all the Time. But I have respect for the life that they have while they're there.

[Lyle]

Do you think that your life is inherently more valuable than the life of a rat?

[Bella]

No, I just feel like it's a power dynamic thing.

[Lyle]

Ooh. Do you feel powerful leading the rats to their death?

[Bella]

No, I feel like. No. I want to say I'm just doing my job.

[Lyle]

But if one of the rats started talking and begged you not to feed them to the snakes, what would you do?

[Bella]

I would grant its release, of course.

[Lyle]

Really? You get fired, though? If I was your. If I was your boss. What's your name? Bella.

[Bella]

Yeah, if.

[Lyle]

What do you. What do you exactly do?

[Bella]

So there's, like, so many parts to the shop right now, and it's kind of like, in a weird spot. I don't even know if it's gonna see it past, like, three or four months because it got underneath us.

[Lyle]

But what do you. But what do you. What do you do in the process?

[Bella]

Oh, like, everything. So. Damn. It's really complicated. It's really weird. So, like, the easiest parts are, like, prepping all the things that they live in so they lay on bedding and stuff, and different sizes, need different sizes. Containers, and then you got to take them out and clean them because they get all nasty and covered in doo doo.

[Lyle]

If I. I just wanted to say, if I was your boss and I heard that you let a rat go because it spoke to you, I. I would. You would be so fired. You really. I would be so furious at you. I would be like, it is. I don't care if the rat did a tap dance and sang a song, all right? I don't pay you to make friends with the rats. That's what. That's what I tell everyone who gets into this business. You never, ever, ever make friends with the rats, okay? Your job is to feed the rats, to make them all fatty and juicy for the snakes. Your job is not to let the rats sing a song that clutches at your heart, okay? This is not a job for. For weak people who can be so easily swayed by. By. By a Mickey Mouse performance, okay? You're not cut out for this industry, sister. That's what I would say. I would. I would say something like that to you if you let Iran.

[Bella]

Well, I'd say, well, sir, boss, I just. I just got it going in the process. I'd take a handful, and we'd go frolicking, and they'd be free, and I'd be jobless. But at least the five sentient rats got freedom.

[Lyle]

Freedom doesn't pay the bills. Okay. Freedom doesn't pay the bills. What pays the bills is. Is murder, Rhett. Yeah, that's what pays the bills. Okay. You work with rats. How's the rest of your life going? Are you okay?

[Bella]

Oh, yeah, it's. It's gone. It's going awesome. So I live on the same property that I work at, so it's like. I kind of live with the rats, too, if you want to think about it that way. So I walk, like. Yeah, I walk, like, three feet, and they're there, so.

[Lyle]

So I guess you're living with the rats, and you really. You haven't formed deep emotional bonds with them.

[Bella]

Yeah. So, like, I was thinking about, like, getting two to, like, keep my own, because they're really sweet, actually.

[Lyle]

Would you tell. Would you ask your boss if you can have the rats, or would you just kind of lift them?

[Bella]

So the interesting thing is, is that my father is the owner, and then his girlfriend's my boss.

[Lyle]

Oh,

[Bella]

yeah. We're all on the pretty same page about things. And if I was like, hey, I'm gonna, like, jack these two rats, they'd be like, all right, just like. Just like, don't forget to take them when you leave.

[Lyle]

Hmm. Do you have. What are your general life aspirations?

[Bella]

To learn how to be happy, to have a life outside of making money and. Yeah, to learn how to be happy.

[Lyle]

What do you think is preventing you from being happy?

[Bella]

I had some stuff happen that I'm trying to. I can't remember it, but it sits dormant in my mind, and it kind of like, it makes things difficult to be hopeful for, if that makes sense.

[Lyle]

Oh, sure. Sure. Are you hopeful about anything?

[Bella]

I'm hopeful that I'll keep moving forward because I know that I can't stop.

[Lyle]

Okay, you can't stop. You can. You shouldn't, but you totally can. In fact, that's actually important. That's important to remember. That's very important to remember that you actually totally can stop. I feel like if you can't. I feel like if you really couldn't stop, it would make not stopping less impressive. But I'm impressed that you don't stop, because you totally can. You can always stop. You can always stop, but you don't, which makes you. Which makes you strong.

[Bella]

It makes me really tired, but, yeah, strong is one way to put it.

[Lyle]

What are you going to not stop doing?

[Bella]

Working and being productive. Or else I'll just bedrot all day because I could sleep 14 hours and still wake up and be tired. I Love sleep.

[Lyle]

What's your name again? Bella.

[Bella]

Bella.

[Lyle]

Mm. Bella, is there anything else you want to say to the people with the computer before we go?

[Bella]

No. I appreciate you answering after I spam called you 20 times. You're a cool guy.

[Lyle]

Hey, you're a cool rat. That didn't make any sense, but God bless you, Bella Geck. Bless you, Bella. Have a good rest of your life. And you know what? Free those MF rats, all right? Free. Free a couple. Free a couple of them. Yeah, free couple of them. Name one Lyle. And the other Jenny if it's a girl.

[Bella]

Okay. Sending pictures of my new gecko rat children on Instagram. I got you.

[Lyle]

Beautiful, beautiful. Have a good rest of your life.

[Bella]

You too. Bye.

[Lyle]

Bye, Bella.

[Podcast Announcer]

No one knows what the future holds, but you deserve a weather app that can help. Weatherbug is easy to use and provides forecasts for your every need. From storm warnings to pollen levels right at your fingertips. Get the fastest local Alerts and comprehensive 10 day forecasts wherever you are. Its hyperlocal, real time customizable alerts. Make sure the weather never takes you by surprise so you can plan every day with confidence. Download the free Weatherbug app from the App Store today and start getting accurate weather forecasts 24. 7.

[Lyle]

This is Chelsea Handler from Dear Chelsea, after the Big Game. Like most people, I kept thinking about the commercials. And there was one that stayed with me. It was from the Blue Square Alliance Against Hate. And it wasn't loud or flashy. It showed a Jewish kid being targeted at school and another student who chose not to ignore it. As someone who was Jewish, that moment

[Podcast Announcer]

felt very real to me.

[Lyle]

Not dramatic, just familiar. And what struck me was how clearly it showed that hate doesn't always announce itself, but the impact is still huge. If you saw the Blue Square spot during the Big Game, it's worth thinking about. And if you want to show support, sharing the Blue Square is one small way to do that.

[Podcast Announcer]

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