“WE MOVED IN FAST”

Summary

Podcast Summary: Therapy Gecko – Episode “WE MOVED IN FAST”

Introduction

“WE MOVED IN FAST” marks a significant milestone for the Therapy Gecko podcast, celebrating five years of enlightening and entertaining conversations. Hosted by Lyle from iHeartPodcasts, this episode delves into personal journeys, relationships, and the complexities of adult life through candid discussions with callers. Skipping the usual advertisements and non-content segments, the episode focuses on heartfelt exchanges that offer listeners both insight and relatability.

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1. Conversation with Cody ([04:22] – [29:20])

Life Updates and Achievements

Cody enters the show with a plethora of life updates, sharing his recent graduation, upcoming EMT certification, engagement, and homeownership. His enthusiasm is palpable as he recounts his journey:

• Cody: “Life's been going great, man. I graduated school. I'm gonna become an EMT next week. Getting engaged. I got engaged. I'm getting married September...” ([04:33])

Lyle commends Cody’s accomplishments, highlighting the significance of his role as an EMT and the stability it brings to his life.

Reconnecting with Family

A pivotal part of Cody’s story is his reconciliation with his mother after an eight-year hiatus. Moving into his mom’s basement for Passover symbolizes a return to his roots and healing old wounds.

• Cody: “Honestly, it was, I was oddly calm the whole way. But immediately when I was there, it was like I felt my hands shaking...” ([14:46])

Lyle empathetically explores the challenges Cody faces in blending his rekindled relationship with his fiancée and his strained relationship with his father.

Coping with Change and Stability

Cody reflects on the balance he maintains between adulthood responsibilities and personal fulfillment, acknowledging feelings of being both ahead and behind in life milestones.

• Cody: “Sometimes I feel like I'm behind a little bit, but then sometimes I feel like I'm a little bit ahead of the curve.” ([24:33])

Engagement and Future Plans

Cody shares heartfelt moments about his engagement, including his creative proposal in an escape room and his excitement for upcoming wedding plans in North Carolina.

• Cody: “I bought an engagement ring and reenacted like our first date... I popped the question there.” ([09:03])

Lyle offers warm congratulations, reinforcing the positive trajectory of Cody’s life and the importance of maintaining peace and balance.

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2. Conversation with Crazy ([34:20] – [60:43])

Introducing Crazy

Crazy, an aspiring musician from Hawaii, brings a mix of passion and struggle to the conversation. His artist name reflects his embrace of individuality and the broader theme of handling life's chaos.

• Crazy: “I think that crazy is such a broad term. So, yeah, I would categorize myself as crazy...” ([34:55])

Career Challenges and Decisions

Crazy discusses his journey in music production, operating his studio “Fuck Around and Find Out Studio,” and grappling with financial and health setbacks after injuring his leg in a mosh pit.

• Crazy: “I want to make music, and I want to be a recording engineer for other people.” ([42:57])
• Crazy: “I went to this concert... I got kicked or just uppercutted in the knee.” ([48:23])

Lyle advocates for practical alternatives to formal education, encouraging Crazy to leverage his existing skills and network to advance his career without incurring substantial debt.

Emotional Resilience and Creative Pursuits

Crazy opens up about his battle with depression following his injury and his determination to stay creative despite the hurdles.

• Crazy: “I wasn't really even appreciating my life... I try to catch myself.” ([47:46])

Lyle emphasizes the importance of maintaining mental health and pursuing passions as coping mechanisms, reinforcing Crazy’s resilience.

Future Aspirations and Self-Acceptance

Crazy contemplates his future in Los Angeles versus returning to Hawaii, ultimately expressing a desire to continue making music and connecting with creative communities.

• Crazy: “I'm just trying to make it happen probably here... I screw myself.” ([43:13])

Lyle offers encouragement, reinforcing the notion that Crazy’s creativity and determination are key assets in his journey.

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3. Conversation with Loofah ([70:34] – [101:13])

Navigating Long-Distance Relationships

Loofah introduces a deeply personal dilemma involving his relationship with a Canadian partner. Having recently moved to Montana to be closer, he faces the challenge of potentially relocating to Canada amidst uncertainties.

• Loofah: “I'm debating whether or not I should just take out a bunch of student loans and live off those or just give up.” ([37:32])

Communication Barriers and Commitment Concerns

The conversation delves into the complexities of defining relationship boundaries and the fear of commitment, especially when past experiences with infidelity loom.

• Loofah: “I need some kind of commitment that, if I were to work towards moving to Canada... she wouldn't just leave me for someone else.” ([94:22])

Lyle advises Loofah to seek clarity and have honest conversations with his partner to address insecurities and solidify their future plans.

Balancing Personal Goals and Relationship Stability

Loofah wrestles with balancing his personal aspirations with maintaining a stable relationship, highlighting the emotional toll of such decisions.

• Loofah: “We met hiking on the Arizona trail in Arizona. We've known each other for two years... We plan to meet each other very often.” ([79:07])

Lyle empathizes, acknowledging the emotional strain and encouraging Loofah to make decisions aligned with his true desires and well-being.

Future Plans and Emotional Well-being

As the discussion progresses, Loofah emphasizes the importance of mutual support and clear communication in fostering a healthy relationship while pursuing individual dreams.

• Loofah: “I really want this life with her... I don't know if she would just leave me.” ([85:21])

Lyle underscores the value of self-awareness and emotional resilience, urging Loofah to prioritize his happiness and relational health.

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Notable Quotes

• Cody on Life Achievements ([04:33]):

  “Life's been going great, man. I graduated school. I'm gonna become an EMT next week. Getting engaged...”

• Cody on Family Reconnection ([14:46]):

  “But immediately when I was there, it was like I felt my hands shaking. It was definitely weird.”

• Crazy on Self-Identification ([34:55]):

  “I would categorize myself as crazy, but I think that any, like, I don't know, I've never really met somebody who I don't think is crazy unless they're like, super boring.”

• Crazy on Career Goals ([42:57]):

  “I want to make music, and I want to be a recording engineer for other people.”

• Loofah on Relationship Dilemmas ([37:32]):

  “I'm debating whether or not I should just take out a bunch of student loans and live off those or just give up.”

• Loofah on Commitment Concerns ([94:22]):

  “I need some kind of commitment that, if I were to work towards moving to Canada... she wouldn't just leave me for someone else.”

---

Conclusion

In this episode of Therapy Gecko, Lyle fosters an environment where callers like Cody, Crazy, and Loofah can openly discuss their personal challenges and triumphs. The conversations highlight themes of personal growth, relationship dynamics, and the pursuit of dreams amidst life's unpredictability. Through empathetic dialogue and insightful guidance, the episode offers listeners a blend of relatable experiences and motivational takeaways, reinforcing the podcast’s commitment to exploring the human condition with humor and heart.

Transcript

[Lyle]

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[Lyle]

Hello, it is me. It is Lyle. Welcome to the Therapy Gecko podcast. I don't normally record intros for these because the calls just kind of speak for themselves, but I don't know, I felt like doing it today. I felt like addressing the people who listen to this show. I don't know. I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you for listening to this show. It's this summer. It'll be five years of being the Therapy Gecko, and it's been a really wild ride. It's had a lot of ups and downs for me, you know, personally, and it's just so cool that this is. This has lasted this long and that I've gotten to do this. And so I just. I maybe wanted a public record of myself so that I can know when I'm 50, whatever years old that in the moment that I was doing this, I recognized how cool it was. So, yeah, I don't know. I just wanted to. To do that. And. And today I am ready to talk to people on the phone. Um, I am currently recording this in my mom's basement where. Where the whole thing started five years ago. Uh, I am home for the Jewish holiday of Passover. Uh, so I'm gonna be eating matzah and saying. Saying stuff. I'm in my mom's basement, and I'm ready to take phone calls like it's 2020 again, except with all the bad 2020 stuff. So let's do it. Therapy Gecko podcast today.

[Cody]

Hello.

[Lyle]

Hey, what's up, man? What's your name?

[Cody]

My name's Cody.

[Lyle]

Cody, what's happening, Cody? What's. What's life looking like for you today?

[Cody]

Life's been going great, man. I. I graduated school. I'm gonna become an EMT next week. Getting engaged. I got engaged. I'm getting married September. I. What else is new? Got a house, watching Love on the Spectrum. Everything's going great, man.

[Lyle]

That's wonderful. God damn. Yeah, you sound like life is going good. Emt. I talk a lot about real jobs on this podcast. EMT is such a super real job. It's like, such a necessary thing. Although I. Are you. Are you worried? I don't know why. I don't know why I'm going to the negative here, but are you Worried about seeing fucked up shit as an emt.

[Cody]

So. So somewhat. I mean, I. I guess I'll cross that bridge when I get to it, but I had ride alongs. I had four ride alongs, and those honestly weren't that bad. I saw a shooting. I. Well, I didn't see him get shot, but he got shot in the leg. Somebody got, like, cut up in his stomach. But other than that, I mean, I. I reacted fine to that. I do have a funny story, though. So I was nervous on my first ride along, and they were like, oh, give her some aspirin. And I was like, okay, cool. So I had like four, like, little. Little pills of aspirin, and she had a free hand. And I don't. I don't know why I did this, but I, one by one, just kind of popped the pills in her mouth. I was like, 1 and 2 and 3 and just. I was like. That was weird. I did it in front of, like, four paramedics and they just all just. I popped up and they all looked at me and I was like, yeah, that was something weird. I did. They didn't call me on it.

[Lyle]

Just counting the pills. While you were popping them in her mouth?

[Cody]

Yeah. Yeah. And then I looked at her and I was like, I guess. Swallow now, please.

[Lyle]

I guess that's not that weird, right? I mean, someone's got to keep track of how many pills were going in there.

[Cody]

Yeah, but I mean, I could have handed it to her in her hand.

[Lyle]

Oh, instead of popping it in her mouth?

[Cody]

Yeah, it was a little odd. How old was this? She was like, 50. 60.

[Lyle]

Okay. All right. You know, I don't. Maybe, maybe, maybe. Maybe she. Maybe it was helpful. I don't know. Maybe it made her feel safe.

[Cody]

Was there something. Yeah. Was there something you wanted to talk specifically about? I sent a few texts over.

[Lyle]

Yeah, sure, man. Let's see. Well, you sent me a couple things. I think you sent me something about how you. You moved in with this lady after two months of knowing her and now you guys are engaged. That's. I want to hear your story. You sound like you have, like, a pretty cool, stable, good life. You seem like a good member of society, and I want to hear your tale.

[Cody]

I try to be. So you. Yeah, we met off Tinder, of all places. So whoever says you can't find love off Tinder, you just gotta look hard. But my lease was coming up and we were just riding around in the car. About a month into knowing each other, we barely even said, hey, we're boyfriend. And girlfriend. And I don't even think we said that we were boyfriend and girlfriend. And we. She was just like, hey, your lease is coming up. I kind of want to move out of my parents. How. How about we move into a two bedroom apartment house type deal? I'm like, that sounds pretty sick, man. And ever since then, it's just been. Been pretty good.

[Walton Goggins]

We.

[Cody]

It's been amazing, actually. We got. We got three cats, two ferrets. Then I. Within like four months after that, I. I bought an engagement ring and reenacted like our first date. Our first date was an escape room and we did not pass it. So I. I hid the ring in like the end of the escape room and I made sure that we would actually pass at this time. I ran through the whole escape room with the escape room people and popped the question there. And ever since then, it's just been. It's been going great. We. We got invitations ready. We got. We got a whole. We got a whole little life here and ever. I don't think we ever had like one fight. We haven't even had a fight yet. We're going on two years.

[Lyle]

Wow, that's awesome. How soon, how long ago was this like. Like moving into getting engaged? How long was that?

[Cody]

About four months, five months or so. Actually. My anniversary present to her was to go see.

[Lyle]

Oh, no shit, really?

[Cody]

Yeah, yeah, it was in Charlotte.

[Lyle]

Oh, which was it, 2023 or 2024?

[Cody]

The one that just happened.

[Lyle]

Okay, cool.

[Cody]

I think.

[Lyle]

Cool. Hell yeah. Did she have fun?

[Cody]

She had a great time. Yeah. Yeah. I tried to get her to send a message, but she. She got. She was a little stage fright. I. I wanted to definitely go on stage, but it was an interesting show. I had a good time there.

[Lyle]

Yeah. Yeah. That's awesome, man.

[Cody]

Especially the. The second guy that popped up there.

[Lyle]

Oh, God. Who was the second guy? Oh, was this the guy who talked about, like, how slavery is good?

[Cody]

Yeah. And then he got into a fight with somebody across the stadium and was just like, something about like, I'm not on drugs. And he was clearly like his friends were holding him back.

[Lyle]

Yeah, I don't even know what was happening. No, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, you know, look, that's at the Therapy Gecko. Live shows, characters do make make appearances, you know, that's. I guess that's part of the. It's part of the shindig, but. No, that's. That's sweet, man. That's fucking sweet. Well, that's awesome. That's interesting. I always feel like I learn a lot about love through this podcast because there's a lot of different stories and a lot of different timelines that people have with each other. How old are you guys?

[Cody]

She just had a birthday yesterday. She's 23. I'm 22.

[Lyle]

Oh, fuck. So you guys are young?

[Cody]

Yeah, yeah, we moved in when we were like, 20, 21.

[Lyle]

Oh, fuck. And everything's going good?

[Cody]

Yeah, everything's going good. Honestly, without her, I don't know if my relationship with my mom would be as good as it is. I, I, I have a lot of. So I don't know how deep I should get into that, but she, my mom came down because I live states away, and my mom came down to come see me. And see, I, I wanted to bring my fiance with me, and I was like, I, I really, I, I would really appreciate it if you come see me, if you took, if you came with me to come see her. She took off a couple days of work so that I wouldn't be alone because I haven't seen my mom in, like, eight years, and I only talked to her like a year before that. So it was, I owe a lot to her. She's an amazing person. But, you know, I got a younger brother and a younger sister, so I definitely owe a lot to my fiance.

[Lyle]

How was it reconnecting with your mom?

[Cody]

So, honestly, it was, I was, I was oddly calm up into. Because we planned to come see each other like, a month before. She was like, oh, I'm going to. Is it okay if I come see you? And I'm like, yeah, of course, of course. So I was oddly calm the whole way. And then, like, immediately when I was there, it was like I felt my hands shaking. It was, it was definitely weird. Definitely had some, some emotions turning. That was, it was, it was definitely a little hard because we didn't end on, on very good terms. And we're working on it. It's kind of like getting to know your parent. It's like getting to know a stranger, which is weird.

[Lyle]

Right?

[Cody]

Right. I haven't seen her since I was like, 16. And then she just drops that. I have a whole sibling and whole, a whole, she has a whole life. And she, she's like, talking about stuff that I knew back when I was like, 16. Like, she's like, oh, do you still like the Walking Dead? And I'm like, I, I don't really know because I, I haven't, I haven't seen that film, so.

[Lyle]

Right, right, right.

[Cody]

It's a, it's, it's a little hard, but it's, we're getting there. We're getting to. As long as she supports me. She actually just sent my fiance cupcakes for her birthday.

[Lyle]

That's nice. So did you just have the one kind of meeting with her or have you been recurringly seeing her?

[Cody]

I will be seeing her on my wedding, and I'm nervous about that because she doesn't really get along with my dad. So it's, it's definitely hard because I don't know how to bring it up to my dad. And I think a part of me is nervous that my dad would be almost upset that I, I know her again. You know, I don't know if that makes sense.

[Lyle]

No, that makes, yeah, I'm so, I'm.

[Cody]

I'm so close with my dad, but I, I noticed me getting very, sometimes like, want to impress him too much, but I just don't know how to bring it up to my dad that, hey, the, your ex wife is gonna be there that you thought I didn't talk to. So I just, I need to figure out how to bring that up as well.

[Lyle]

Are you, are you looking forward to having your mom at your wedding?

[Cody]

Yeah, yeah, she's gonna be, she's gonna be super proud. I'm looking forward to both of them being there. I just, and I don't think anything will happen. I just, I'm not entirely sure why I'm nervous except, like, I, I don't think any drama is gonna pop off. I don't think any, I don't think anybody's gonna get into a fight or start to talk to each other. I just, I want, I want everybody to be as comfortable as they can. And. I don't know. I, I, I don't know. I don't know. It's just, it's, it's weird to explain.

[Loofah]

Because.

[Cody]

It'S hard, but I'm definitely looking forward to all people being there.

[Lyle]

Do you, you know, by the way, you can get as deep or not deep into this as you want to. You know, we can talk about any number of things. But, you know, is there, is there, is there a reason why you stopped talking to her? Like, eight years ago?

[Cody]

She, she said that she didn't want to talk to me. Basically. She, there was a really messy divorce with my dad and really the whole family, but it, yeah, it was just, it was just really, it was just really messy. She just, I, I just, I, she just said she didn't really want to talk to me, so I just, I, I Let it be. And then she said she wanted to, but I was. I was too hurt to obviously say, hey, yeah, that, that, that stuff's never happened. What happened? What, what you said before never happened, you know, But I mean, I'm, I'm working past it. She's. She's genuinely working, she's genuinely trying, and she's 110%, like, she was already a good mom. And I think that just. She had, she had a lot of stuff on her plate. And I'm not taking anything personally from what she said it did or what anybody said or did, but what is.

[Lyle]

What'S the deal with your. You said you have a lot of siblings. What is their deal? Are they. Are they cool with your mom?

[Cody]

Yeah. Yeah. So my, My younger brother, he. He saw her for the first time with me too. I was like, hey man, I'm. I went. And I went to go see her, but I, I understand if you don't want to go see her because he was down here for a couple days. I was like, hey man, I went to go see her. If you don't want to, it's totally okay. But I'll be right there with you. And he. I only have like the one biological sibling, but, yeah, he's. He's working his way there. He's. He's. He's not as far as me because I don't. I. I don't know if he can. I don't know. I don't know what the right word is. But he, he's not as. I guess he's just not as. As far as me as like in like, forgiving or understanding. But he might be. Who knows? He's. He's a. He's a hard book to read sometimes.

[Lyle]

Mm.

[Cody]

But yeah, he. He's. He's becoming cool with her too. Really likes my, My younger sibling. We went. Had a good time there, but.

[Lyle]

And so this is a, this is a half sibling. Like your mom went and had it? Yeah. With someone else?

[Cody]

Well, she adopted.

[Lyle]

Okay. Is your mom. Is your mom with someone new?

[Cody]

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

[Lyle]

Okay. Do you like him and do you like their adopted kid? Like, have. You. Have you chill with them?

[Cody]

I. The adopted kid was. It's pretty cool. He was, he was a handful. He was very active. He was like, I think like four.

[Lyle]

Oh, okay.

[Cody]

But yeah, yeah, he was crazy. But yeah, he was. He was a fun time. And her boyfriend or husband, he's. He's pretty cool. I think he was just nervous to meet me the first time because he was A. He was a chatter.

[Loofah]

He would.

[Cody]

He really liked to talk. But I was like, at some points I was just like, okay, man, I'd like to speak to, to my mother.

[Lyle]

But yeah, he's not. Yeah, it's like, it's like you already don't really. Like, if you, if your mom already feels like a stranger, your mom's new boyfriend is, is going to feel like, you know, why do I give a fuck about talking to this guy, right?

[Cody]

No, no, he was, he was cool. He was a cool guy, but at some point I was just like, okay.

[Lyle]

Okay, you're not, you're not the main event at this table, right?

[Cody]

No, I think he just wanted to like impress us or whatever.

[Lyle]

Sure, whatever. Yeah. Which I guess is nice that they, it's nice that they, they as a couple want you guys, you know, in. In their life. They want you to like them. I guess that's nice.

[Cody]

Yeah, I'd rather he do that than just sit in the corner on his phone or just.

[Lyle]

Sure, yeah, yeah. Knock off someone else. Yeah, man, you know, that's you. Yeah, I gotta say, you're on. You're 23. 22. 20, 22. You're so. God, I don't know how this feels for you to hear, but you're just, you're dealing with so much like, you know, I know 22 isn't fucking 14 or whatever, but you, you dealing with so much adult shit. You know what I mean? Like, you're the, you're the real adults in the room, like doing EMT shit, getting a fucking house, getting married, doing the whole, like, you're a real. You're very grown up 22 year olds, you know? Do you. How does that, like, how do. Yeah, how does that feel for you? Because I'm 27. I feel like I'm. I'm 16 years old.

[Cody]

Well, I mean, yeah, I don't always feel like an adult. I kind of sometimes feel. Sometimes feel like I'm like behind it a little bit, but I think that's, that's everybody. Because I got some point. Like, I'm like, oh, I, I joined EMT too late. Because some people get into it when they're like 18, 19. I saved up so I could go to school because I was living on my own. I'm like, oh, I'm a little bit behind on that. Or like, oh, I'm. I'm buying Pokemon cards when I'm 22 years old. It's. I know sometimes I feel like I'm behind, but then sometimes I feel Like I'm. I'm a little bit ahead of the curve. But I appreciate you saying that.

[Lyle]

Trust me. There are many men in their 30s, 40s and beyond who are. Who are also buying Pokemon cards.

[Cody]

I know those scalp is a crazy nowadays.

[Lyle]

Yeah, no, I got. I got a lot of. I got a lot of respect for you, brother. You're, you know, because that's the thing is all this stuff is hard now, but I just have a feeling for you that, like, I don't know, you're gonna. Life's gonna continue to be good for you just because you're fucking, you know. Not insane.

[Cody]

Not insane. That's what I try to be.

[Lyle]

Well, let's see, man. I know you texted me a bunch of other stuff. Maybe I could get into that. You said. Well, you said. You just texted me saying, I'm playing Wii Sports right now. I don't know if you have. Have anything to say about that. That would. You texted me that over a year ago. I'm just looking at. I think I texted you now.

[Cody]

Yeah, I think I was. I remember that day we were eating brownies and we were playing Wii Sports and then I was like, hey man, GEK is. Geck is streaming right now. I need to try to get on, but I know what else to say. I was like, Wii Sportsman, what's your favorite Wii sport?

[Lyle]

Probably bowling, because it is. I think it is the easiest. It's probably the most stationary of all the Wii Sports.

[Cody]

Bowling's good. Bowling's good. I like. I like golf. A lot of stuff to do in golf.

[Lyle]

Yeah, I used to have the little plastic attachments that you put on the Wii for the Wii Sports and you know, I used it once and then they went. Now they're in a. In a landfill somewhere. What's your name again?

[Cody]

My name is. My name's Cody.

[Lyle]

Cody. Cody, is there anything else you want to say to the people at the computer before we go or anything else you want to talk about?

[Cody]

Not. Not too. Not too much, man. Yeah, you're invited. You're invited to the wedding.

[Lyle]

Where's the wedding?

[Crazy]

Where?

[Lyle]

Yeah.

[Cody]

North Carolina.

[Lyle]

North Carolina. Oh, man. When is it?

[Cody]

Free pizza. September.

[Lyle]

September. If I truly hate making promises that I can't keep, so. But I'll make you this. I'll make you this promise. If for some reason I happen to be in Charlotte for some other reason, that the weekend that you're having your wedding, I'll 100% go. If I have some.

[Loofah]

We would.

[Lyle]

Other reason that I am there. I. I'll Go the way.

[Cody]

We'd love to have you there. Free pizza and beer and wine for you.

[Lyle]

Okay. Rock and roll. Okay. All right. What. Where's it from? Where are you getting it from?

[Cody]

It's like this, like homemade pizza place, low key. It's like five minutes down the street from when we're getting married.

[Lyle]

Mazel tov to you, Cody. You got a good life. Don't. Yeah. Be. I hope you're at peace. I hope you're at peace. You deserve some. You deserve some peace. You got a peaceful life, my friend. I'll, I'll, I'll. I'll talk to you again. Around the universe, dude.

[Cody]

I'll see you, man. Do some more. Stand up. I appreciate it.

[Lyle]

Okay, I will. Wait. You. Oh, wait, just. Oh, at the show? Yeah, I'm planning to. I've been going up open mics and stuff. That's been fun. All right, take care, man.

[Cody]

Yeah, you too. Bye.

[Lyle]

What is. What a sweet fucking guy. This happens on the show all the time, dude. I'll meet like a 21, 22 year old. 20 year old calls in and they're just like their fucking whole. All their shit is so. Is so together, you know, it's fascinating. It's fascinating because I'm always, I don't know, I always bring it back to myself, but I'm like always on the. That I think I do it in my regular life, but I also do it on this show is like, you know, when you're, I think, on like a journey for peace or a journey for like the life. Life doesn't really come with a handbook or anything. So you just look at what other people do with their lives and they're like, did that. Is that a way to get peace? You know? And I don't know. I like, I liked Cody a lot. He seemed, you know, he had a job, that means something. He seems to be in a nice relationship. He just seemed calm when I talked to him. And that's difficult. It's. Achieving peace, I think, is difficult. So I'm happy for him. And if, if I have some other. I'm not, I'm not gonna go to Charlotte just for his wedding. I'm. I, I'm not gonna go just for his wedding. But if I, if, if I, if there's two weddings going on in Charlotte, maybe I'll go. I need, I need a. If anyone has a second thing, it's really compelling for me to go to Charlotte in September. Maybe I'll do it. I want to go back there for A live show. I love the comedy club there. The Charlotte Comedy Zone. That place is awesome. I've had great, great fun shows there. But yeah, shout out, Cody. Mazel tov. Hey, folks. This episode is sponsored by ChatGPT. ChatGPT plus is free for college students now through May. That means you have no limits on how many ways you can prompt ChatGPT to help you through the worst part of the school year. There's many ways you can do this, like uploading your class notes and having ChatGPT quiz you on them.

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[Crazy]

How are you? Yeah, how are you? Can you hear me?

[Lyle]

Yeah, I can hear you. What's up, man? What's your name?

[Crazy]

My name's Crazy.

[Lyle]

Crazy. That's a good name.

[Cody]

Yeah.

[Lyle]

What's up, Crazy? Why are you crazy?

[Crazy]

Oh, that, that's, that's my artist name. It's my rap name. And it's just, it's because I think that crazy, it gets a bad rep, like. So I'm trying to represent and uplift the name Crazy.

[Lyle]

Do you. Do you feel as though you are crazy?

[Crazy]

Oh, I mean, people have called me crazy before, but I think that crazy is such a, like, it's such like a broad term. So, yeah, I would categorize myself as crazy, but I think that any, like, I don't know, I've never really met somebody who I don't think is crazy unless they're like, super boring.

[Lyle]

Bro, you and I are, are built of the same. We're cut from the same cloth. I was in a car with my, my best friend the other day and he was telling me about, like, he was like, you think everyone is crazy. You've gone on so many rants about how all things are crazy, all people are crazy. You talk about how you don't shut the fuck up about how life is crazy. And it's, it's true. I'm so with you. I feel like I found a kindred spirit in you. Crazy because I'm, I'm with you. I think life is. I try not to. I'm trying not to think about it less because I don't think it's fun to think about, you know, as your default way of thinking. But yeah, life is Crazy. Everybody is crazy. Consciousness is crazy. All people are every. Yeah, I'm with you. I'm with you. Crazy. Everything's crazy. Thank you. Finally, finally got. I am so happy and excited to talk to you crazy. Because for a while, for, for a while crazy. I'm telling you.

[Crazy]

Yeah.

[Lyle]

I thought I was crazy for thinking that everything was crazy. And here you are crazy, and you're like, yeah, no, everything is crazy. You're, I feel very validated by you crazy. So let's, let's talk about things being crazy.

[Crazy]

Hey, let's, let's do it. Yeah, no, I've been, I've been, I've been a fan of your, your stream for like a little bit now. I just, I just started watching it randomly, but I, I think it's really cool, man, seeing people calling. Yeah, I mean, I'm down, I'm definitely down to talk with you, man. Yeah, basically, I'm just, I'm just calling because I, I moved to LA like, about a year ago to pursue music, and I'm just kind of at like, like a turning point in my life because I just messed up my leg and so I can't work right now. And. Well, I mean, I'm trying to get jobs where I can work with a mess of leg, but yeah, basically, like, I'm, like, debating whether or not I should just, like, take out a bunch of student loans and live off those or, or just, like, give up. I don't know, but I don't know. Yeah, that's, or just try and make it happen some other way.

[Cody]

I guess.

[Crazy]

Those are, like, my three options.

[Lyle]

Okay, sorry, I, I, I want, Let me, let me backtrack here. Your three options, Recount them again. Is to take out student loans to go to school or to just take out loans.

[Crazy]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. To go to school.

[Lyle]

Go to school to do what?

[Crazy]

Audio production.

[Lyle]

Okay. What are the other ones?

[Crazy]

Other one is I give up and fly back home.

[Lyle]

Okay.

[Crazy]

Live in a tent.

[Lyle]

Okay. Is living a tent option three? Or if you went back home, you'd live in a tent?

[Crazy]

Yeah, I live in a tent.

[Lyle]

Okay. Are you serious about living in a tent? Or do you have, like, family you could go back home with?

[Crazy]

Well, I'm serious about living in a tent because, like, I, if I went back home, I'd be living in a tent on my, my dad's property.

[Lyle]

Your dad wouldn't let you live? Your dad would let you live in the, in, like, the house part of the property.

[Crazy]

He doesn't, he doesn't have A house. He just has land.

[Lyle]

Where's he live?

[Crazy]

So I live in a tent. He lives with a roommate right now, but he's trying to. He's trying to make it happen in, like, a van and build, like a shack out there.

[Lyle]

All right, cool. All right. So you would live in a tent. And that was option three.

[Crazy]

Option three is just try and. Just try and hope for the best with. With what I'm already doing. Just trying to, like, make money and do jobs. And then, like, I started a studio at my house. It's called Fuck around and Find Out Studio. And I'm only charging people 25 an hour to record songs. And I've been doing this for, like, 10 years, recording. So I'm, like, confident in my skills of, like, a recording engineer, but I still need to work on mixing, mastering. That's why I want to go to school for audio production.

[Lyle]

Okay, so you've been doing this for 10 years? In. In this. And where. Where is home for you? Like, what state?

[Crazy]

Oh, Hawaii.

[Lyle]

Hawaii. Oh, cool. Okay. And so you have, like, the past 10 years, have you been in LA or have you been in Hawaii? Because you told me you just moved, right?

[Crazy]

Yeah, yeah, so. So I just got here to LA on April Fool's Day last year. Well, technically April 2nd. But my. I moved into my new spot. Yeah, it was like. Yeah, it's basically been April 2nd because I missed the Greyhound. I caught like a Greyhound from Seattle because me and my friends moved from Seattle. I only lived in Seattle for, like, four months.

[Lyle]

So when you say you've been doing this for 10 years, like you've been doing it on your laptop for 10 years, doing, like, mixing and mastery and shit?

[Crazy]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. At least eight. Eight, Seriously. But around ten.

[Lyle]

And why did you go to la?

[Crazy]

To make music. There's, like, a lot of opportunities music here. There's a lot of creative people here. It just feels like a place that I fit in more than in Hawaii.

[Lyle]

Okay, so you. I mean, you like being there?

[Crazy]

Yeah.

[Lyle]

Okay, so option one is to take out a bunch of student loans and go to music school in la. Option two is to go live in a tent in Hawaii. Option three is to keep doing what you're doing right now, which. Tell me again what that looks like.

[Crazy]

What that looks like is hoping that my knee recovers quickly, signing up for more jobs and trying to freelance a studio business out of my house.

[Lyle]

Can't you just. Okay. I have a few questions about your options. Right. Is like. Okay, well, number one with the school thing is like, you know more about this industry than. Than I do. But is. Is there anything in the universe of music production that you can't just fucking. There's a fire truck on. Is there anything in the world of music production that you can't just learn? I feel like we're in a. We're in a song right now that has the police sirens in the background, you know, I'm saying. Okay, sorry.

[Crazy]

You're good. That's just my. My house. Yeah.

[Lyle]

I was. Okay. Sorry. I was gonna say, why can't. Okay. Why can't you just learn this on the Internet? Why do you have to spend a billion dollars to go to school?

[Crazy]

Because, well, I can learn it on the Internet to a degree. It's just that I'm. I'm limited by the type of equipment that I can use. So, you know, I have, like, an okay setup, but if I went to school, then I could learn how to use, like, million dollar, like, equipment.

[Lyle]

Okay, what's your ultimate, like, goal? Is it to, like, do you want to do, like, your own artist project or you want to be a producer for other people?

[Crazy]

Well, I want to make music, and I want to be a recording engineer for other people.

[Lyle]

Okay. Do you think that. How much would it cost for you to go to school?

[Crazy]

Oh, man, it's like 88,000. But I could probably get some, like, student aid.

[Lyle]

Here's the thing. I'm not a. I've gone on this rant on this show a billion times, but, like, I'm not. I'm not a huge fan of, like, going $88,000 into debt for, you know, like, something that's not, like, a hot guarantee. You know, I'm not. If you were to tell me, like, yeah, I'm investing money into equipment, you know, that would. That would make sense. Or you're investing money into, like, online courses. But I just don't think that the absolute best way to invest in this is, like, through school. I mean, I guess if I were you, you're already out in la. I assume you have your cost of living as low as it can go with, you know, roommates and whatever.

[Crazy]

I kind of screwed myself. Yeah.

[Lyle]

How'd you screw yourself?

[Crazy]

Well, I signed a year lease, and then the, like, literally the day before my, like, whole year started for the lease, or like two days before, I really messed up my leg. It's like my knee is all messed up.

[Lyle]

Why did that screw you? Why did that screw you in your living situation?

[Crazy]

Well, because now I don't have the three jobs that I had anymore, so.

[Lyle]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Crazy]

I mean, I technically still have two of them, but they're just. I just have to, like, figure out how I can come go back to them and. Yeah, all that stuff.

[Lyle]

I don't know, maybe I'm a boomer about all of this, but I don't know how the. The music industry works. It just. It just seems like something that has, like, a low barrier to entry in terms of the making of the stuff. Right? Like, and I'm sure. I'm sure that DJs and music producers will get furious with me for saying that, you know, just as. Just as I say. I say that, you know, you can make a great movie on your iPhone, right? But I think when it comes to wanting to be a producer for other people, it's like, well, you know, make a list of the 20 fucking people that you really want to do it for or a hundred people you really want to do it for and find out how to reach out to them and find a sample. Make a sample that you're really proud of. And there's a lot of kind of, you know, whatever. Hustle. Yeah. Entrepreneur. Y ways you can go about it other than just, like, going to school.

[Crazy]

I totally agree. You know, I think you convinced me, man. School, college, club sucks. I never wanted to go to college anyway, so. Yeah, you convinced me, man. I'm just trying to make it happen probably here. I mean, I don't. I really don't want to go back to life. I just. Yeah, probably gonna make. Try to make it here, but. Yeah, man. I mean, I just. Yeah, I realized, like, when my leg got messed up like, that I was just. You know, all my jobs, like, were almost like, zero skill involved in them, unfortunately. I mean, I was. I'm like a delivery rider, and I work at a grocery store and a restaurant. I was just like, dang. Like, I just realized that, like, if I didn't have my leg, like, my job just doesn't give a about me. Like, not. Or they just don't really have the room for me. And, like, I don't know. Yeah. Just kind of like. Well, it did make me. It made me depressed. Like, the first day, to be honest, I was like. I was a little bit depressed. I mean, the doctor asked me if I was depressed. I was like, no, because I don't know. I. I recovered from it, like, kind of quickly.

[Lyle]

Yeah.

[Crazy]

But, like, I just try to catch myself. I was like. I just noticed that I was. I was starting to do, like, bad habits. That I've, like, since, like, moved on from in my life. And I felt like that was, like, assigned to me. I was like, okay, like, I'm feeling a little bit depressed because, yeah, I was just bummed out because, like, I wasn't really even appreciating my life. And I even tell you the worst part, man. I didn't even tell you, like, how I messed up my leg, man. That's like the most embarrassing part.

[Lyle]

How'd you mess up your legs?

[Crazy]

Well, I messed up my leg because I went to this concert. It's like a NASCAR Aloe concert. So it's like trap metal music and metal music, and I was like, dancing in the mosh pit for, like, the whole night. But then once NASCAR Aloe comes in, because he was the headliner, he was the last artist, he started playing his song Move to Move to America. Right? And. And when he was playing that song, they. They messed up my leg pretty bad.

[Lyle]

Yeah, the. The. The mosh pit.

[Crazy]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I. I got distracted because I was just busy dancing. Like, I. I don't even like mosh in the mosh pit. I just was, like, dancing and dodging people, but I got distracted because NASCAR Isla was going. Going off, and then, oh, my leg just got messed up.

[Lyle]

Yeah. I mean, yeah, the mosh pit is a bit of a fuck around and find out kind of place I was.

[Crazy]

Yeah, that's why I named my studio that. Yeah.

[Lyle]

Oh, you named your studio the Mosh Pit?

[Crazy]

No, I need my studio. Fuck around and find out. Studio.

[Lyle]

That's fun. I. Yeah, dude, I. Some people, I was. I don't know why, but I was at a, like, as. Four months ago, I was at a punk show in Baltimore with my friends, and I hadn't been to, like, something like that in a. In a long time. And the mosh pit is crazy. People are doing full 360 degree wheels with both arms, just like, beating, just. Just a tornado of fists and they're running all around. It is. It is an orgy of kinetic energy and violence. It is a lot of fun. It's fun to go near, but you don't. You don't want to tow the line because you will get punched in the fucking face unapologetically.

[Cody]

Yeah.

[Crazy]

Luckily, I didn't get punched in the face. That's what I was thankful for. But I did get either kicked or just uppercutted in the knee. And the doctors say I might have torn my meniscus. But. Yeah, I don't know.

[Lyle]

What's your name?

[Crazy]

Again, I tried to bike home afterwards. Crazy.

[Lyle]

Crazy. All right. Of course. How could I forget Crazy Crazy. Okay, a couple things. One is, you know, if you decide you don't want to go to college and you want to save the money, you know, I think that's cool if you have to go back.

[Crazy]

Well, I don't have any money.

[Lyle]

Well, yeah, if you don't have any. If you don't have any money, you don't want to have negative money, you know, with debt.

[Crazy]

Yeah, I guess that's true.

[Lyle]

So I think, yeah, have. Yeah, I mean, that's, that's the. If you're gonna go into debt, I think it should be for a real, real fucking good reason. But also, but like, look, man, he's. If you have to go back and live in a tent in Hawaii, don't. Don't consider the dream dead.

[Crazy]

Nah, that shit.

[Lyle]

Nah. Look, here's what I'm saying, here's what I'm saying. I don't think you're gonna have to go back to the tent. I don't think you're gonna have to go back to the tent. I think you can make it in Los Angeles. I think you can. I'm holding out for you to hold out, but if you're looking around and you just financially leg Lee, whatever, you got to go back and live in the tent for a second is. It's not over if you have to go live in the tent. You can make music and be around other creative people making things in, in really any major city in the world and just on your. Or just fucking, you know, in the world we live in on the fucking computer. So you know what, you can twitch stream, you can twitch stream sets from the fucking tent. You know, there's ways to do all this. So yes, I encourage you to just, I guess try to be creative and try not to count yourself out and you know, keep, keep doing your shit. Crazy. You're fucking crazy. I'm crazy. Everything's. Everything's crazy.

[Crazy]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm crazy. All right. And yeah, I mean, yeah, I mean that, that was mostly, mostly the reason I called. I'm gonna have like a housewarming party tonight. But yeah, it's just like, it's just, it's just nerve wracking and stuff. But I mean, I think that I, I think I'll make it to my friend. He moved out here too. He's like. He just like doubled his rent and stuff. But I don't know, I'm not gonna put his information out too Much.

[Lyle]

You're having a. You're having a house party tonight.

[Crazy]

Housewarming party. Yeah, but it's just two of my friends. It's not really a party.

[Lyle]

This fucking fun, man. Glad to have fun. Don't look. Whatever. Here's the thing. Worry and stressed and be out. I mean, worry and stress out during the day, but once it hits around 7pm Just clock out and hang out with your friends because, you know, that's the only fucking real thing.

[Crazy]

Yeah. Yeah, you're right. You're right, man. Well, yeah, man. Yeah, it's definitely been helpful and. And. And, yeah, like. Yeah, man. Appreciate your help.

[Lyle]

You want to plug? You can plug if you want. I want to hear your shit.

[Crazy]

I mean, it's just. It's crazy spelled, like K, R A.

[Lyle]

Y E Z Y. K, R A Y E, Z Y, Z. Oh, cray cray easy.

[Crazy]

Yeah.

[Lyle]

Yeah.

[Crazy]

Some people say crazy. Yeah. I fuck with that.

[Lyle]

Oh, well, I. Cray easy. Y.

[Crazy]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Lyle]

Like, what do you want?

[Crazy]

R A Y.

[Lyle]

Is your name okay? You're okay? You're Kyle? Is that you?

[Crazy]

Oh, yeah. Well, you're on Instagram or something?

[Lyle]

Yeah. Oh, is that. Should we not. Is that bad to have?

[Crazy]

Oh, no, no, it's fine. I mean, I don't really care that people. I. I didn't really say.

[Lyle]

Oh, no, I'm just looking for. I'm just. I was just like. What are you. Okay. I'm on your. Okay. Soundcloud. Is that where you have most of your.

[Crazy]

I mean, you have one.

[Lyle]

So you have one song? You have one song?

[Crazy]

Yeah, it's only one.

[Lyle]

Can I listen to it? It's not gonna be able to play on the podcast, but I'll just live reaction, listen to it.

[Crazy]

Oh, thanks, man. Yeah, no, that'd be sick.

[Lyle]

All right, this is cray. All right. If the people at home want to listen to this, this is Cray Easy. The song is Antiseptic, so you can probably find it on. On his. You can find it if you go on the Internet. All right. I'm gonna blind listen to this.

[Crazy]

Yeah.

[Lyle]

Little crazy.

[Crazy]

Yeah. Thank you.

[Lyle]

I like it.

[Crazy]

Thanks, man.

[Lyle]

Yeah, for sure. I like. I think people check it out. I just realized that I wasn't. I just realized that if I can't put it on the podcast, I was gonna be staring, standing there in silence for.

[Crazy]

Oh, yeah, yeah, that would be awkward.

[Lyle]

20 seconds. But I didn't want to talk over it. But I like it. I like. I'm not. I'm not Anthony Fantano or anything. But I, I, I, like, I, like, it's definitely crazy. I sound like. I sound like I'm trying to come up with something nice to say, but I genuinely. I genuinely do like it.

[Crazy]

No, no. Yeah, yeah. I'm just saying, you tell me if it's trash, right?

[Lyle]

Yeah, I would tell you if it's. If it was trash.

[Crazy]

If it was trash, then I'd be. I'd be on a plane back to Hawaii, probably. No, I'm just kidding. I, I don't, I don't take one person's opinion that seriously. But, like, if enough people convince me that it's trash, then, like, I guess I'm like, I'm still gonna make music, but I'm probably not gonna try and, like, make it in a major city because it's a little bit tough. I don't know. You know what? I screw other people. I. I don't know. I don't. I don't care what other people think, actually. But it does make it easier if people are like, okay, yeah, you're going in the right direction. Like, I respect everybody's opinion, but I don't think that I should let it affect my actions.

[Lyle]

You know, getting validation on your life. You know what the scariest fucking thing about being, like, an adult with free will is? Is that no one can really give you some sort of final validation on any of your life choices.

[Crazy]

No, yeah, that's true. That's true.

[Lyle]

It's what it is. It is one of the most terrifying parts of being. Being an adult. But it caught. But you know what? It's. That's. It's a tax on having the freedom to make those decisions. But anyway, crazy. Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?

[Crazy]

Oh, yeah, yeah. Okay. So to the people, the computer, I just want to say that, you know, always love yourself, always stay positive, no matter. Oh, and. Well, I mean, I would just say to all the atheists out there, I would just say reconsider that. Just.

[Lyle]

You're a man. You're a man of God.

[Crazy]

I believe in a higher power. Yeah.

[Lyle]

I believe. I don't know if I believe in, like, Christianity so much, but I. A higher power. I'm starting to. I'm starting to kind of think there's got to be some. I don't know if I don't know about Jesus, but there's almost certainly some form of higher consciousness or something like that.

[Crazy]

Yeah, I respect that. I respect that. Yeah. That's why I, like, I'm not Hating on the atheists out there. I'm just. I'm just asking them to. To maybe reconsider because, you know, why commit to. To not believing in an afterlife or in, you know, anything greater than this world? Because, I don't know, sometimes, like, it could get super depressing if you think, like, oh, yeah, this is it. This is the. This is the meaning of it all. We're just, you know, here doing this. Because, like, I mean, at the same time, though, I mean, while you're here on Earth, I think that spreading positivity is the best thing that we can do because we can. We can lift everybody around us up and we can give other people the motivation to, like, chase their dreams if we just. Yeah, if we just don't give up on ourselves and if we. If we don't do things that. Because I feel like everybody has the conscious, and like, sometimes you ignore your conscious and. And that's when. That's when you start thinking negatively a lot of time.

[Lyle]

Crazy. Thanks for calling and good luck on your journey, brother.

[Crazy]

Thanks, Lyle. It's super good talking with you. And yes, they stay crazy, bro.

[Lyle]

Hopefully my. Hopefully I'll be less crazy next time you talk to me. But you. You. You stay crazy too, brother. You stay crazy, too.

[Crazy]

Yeah, yeah, I'm gonna be crazy, and then I'm gonna be a little crazy eventually because, yeah, I feel like I'm on the same journey.

[Lyle]

Yeah, you'll be. You'll be. Yeah, you'll be. You'll be a little crazy. You'll be a little crazy because you're a little less crazy. All right. See you. Crazy. Yeah. Fuck. I hung up on him. But I didn't really hang up on him. The conversation was over. I liked that guy a lot. I really did. I liked that guy a lot. Yeah, he was talking about, well, okay, what is an atheist? I'm gonna actually Google this. A theist definition. A person who lacks belief in the existence of God. But what, like, what is God? God is like a supreme being, creator, principal object of faith. Yeah, I think, like, the concept of, like, God is like a. Is sort of like there's a supreme being who is like. And like. And like, existence is. Is a monarchy ruled by God. I don't know. I don't think I believe in that. But I. There's got to be some kind of higher power. I was thinking a lot about, like, oh, I've sure I've talked about this on the fucking podcast before, but I've been thinking a lot about just like, whoa, what we are all experiencing is quite psychedelic and bizarre and miraculous and beyond comprehension. Even if you. I guess, even if you study stuff. Someone in the. Someone in the. In the. In the stream chat said you could even say that life is crazy. And that's. I believe that. So I don't know if I believe in like there is a God and he is watching and all that. You know, Jesus and stuff. But you know, when we die or was just when we died, it's probably exactly how it was before we were born. That makes a lot of sense. But then what the fuck is our consciousness? Where does that go? Does that go anywhere? I don't know. I don't know what. Look, I also. Well, also also, you know what? I was. I'm gonna. Alright, I'm gonna keep going on this rant because it's. I'm enjoying it. Like you ever. Like sometimes you'll be walking and you'll see someone and maybe they're like, I don't. Like I'll be in New York and I'll see somebody like sleeping on the street and I'll just be like, there's no. Like, tell me if this makes sense to folks. There's no real reason at all whatsoever why I am me and that guy is him. There's no real reason. You know, I mean people make arguments about like, you know, making different choices and people make. And you know, but, but yeah, yes, this is the thing. You grow up in different circumstances that are completely utterly fucking random. You know, your brain chemistry caught. Even. Even if you and someone else do make different decisions, your brain chemistry is completely fucking random. And so the, the. The reason, so the, the reason why you make the decisions that you make is. Is completely random. Like, it's just so rare. There's no fucking reason why I am me and anyone else is anyone else. There's no. And again, you sure? Certain point you can argue it's like I had. I intrinsically made different decisions. But there's. But what is it in my head that causes me to make decisions that negatively impact my life or positively impact my life? And I'm not talking about specifically me. And it's like, yeah, it's a fucking singularity. We're all one. So I think that is God. That's kind of God to me in a sense is answering that question. Why is anyone who they are. Why am I me random? I'm so. I'm. I'm myself so randomly it's insane. There's no fucking reason why I am. I am me. And anyone else is who they are. Why am I not a fucking dog? Dude, I think about this too much. All right. Anyway, I get. Yeah, that's. My God. I think. Alright, that's it. I, I, I'm, I'm gonna stop ranting about this because I'm gonna stop ranting about this because I missed the, I missed the times in my life where I just fucking played Super Mario and I didn't think about any of this shit. I'm glad I do think about this shit. Sometimes I think if I went through this r, this ride of life and I never thought about any of this shit once, I'd probably have an awesome time. I'd probably have so much more fun. But whatever. I am who I am. This is I. These thoughts come into my brain. I accept it. It could be worse. Alright, whatever. Let's keep going. Hey, folks. This episode is sponsored by ChatGPT Plus. ChatGPT plus is free for college students now through May. That means you have no limits on how many ways you can prompt ChatGPT to help you through the worst part of the school year. There's many ways you can do this, like uploading your class notes and having ChatGPT quiz you on them. Or asking ChatGPT to take a complicated concept and try to explain it to you in simpler terms to help you understand. You can even use it to help design a diet and exercise plan that optimizes your energy for studying. You can use the voice feature to practice interviewing for jobs post graduation. 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[Lyle]

Hello. Hi. What is your name?

[Loofah]

No way, dude.

[Cody]

Lyle.

[Loofah]

My name. Oh, my gosh. Wow. My name is Loofah. Let's go with Loofah.

[Lyle]

Loofah, good to talk to you. Loofah. How you doing this evening?

[Loofah]

It's good to talk to you, man. I'm doing all right. Just got home from work, had some Chinese food. I was about to go ride my bike to get my car fixed and saw that you're streaming, so thought I'd hit you up, man. So it's super cool to be on. You know, I've listened for a for A hot minute and. Yeah, that's cool to catch you at. How are you doing tonight?

[Lyle]

You know, I'm not just saying this, but I'm actually doing better now that I'm here recording. You know, idle hands are. Are they belong to the devil. The devil uses idle hands to. To jerk him off and come devil fire on your face. That wasn't that funny, but I tried. You sound like you're having a chill night. I love a chill night. You're getting Chinese food and you're gonna ride a bike.

[Loofah]

That's the plan. I am gonna ride a bike.

[Lyle]

Are you a, you know, the chill guy meme?

[Loofah]

Like with the like dog with hands?

[Lyle]

Yeah, with the dog with hands. That's who I imagine you as. Are you. Would you identify with that?

[Loofah]

Um, no.

[Lyle]

Really?

[Loofah]

No. Like, for one, typically phone calls are like horrible. Like for me personally, I actually have a stutter, but right now I'm pretty fluent, which is kind of funny. But yeah, like phone calls for work and just even talking to like my parents and stuff. Sometimes, like I just like, I don't know, I'm not very chill. But yeah, yeah. But I feel all right today. It's Friday.

[Lyle]

What about in real life? Are you better in real life or is it. Is it just the phones?

[Loofah]

For sure. Better in real life? Yeah. Like I feel like phones, like the only medium of conversation is, you know, voice and like audio and so like every cue, like every non verbal cue that you have with talking in person is just not there, you know, so. Yeah.

[Lyle]

Mm. Well, what do you. Oh, oh, oh. I know what I was gonna say. Was there anything in particular that you wanted to talk about today? It's okay. If not you talking about nothing.

[Loofah]

No, I kinda do have something to talk about. I kind of like big picture in my life. I feel like I'm just kind of at a crossroads with where I want to take my life. You know, I. I don't know where exactly to begin. I recently moved to Montana, which I'm loving, it's such a cool state. And I moved here to be in a smaller town, but also be near the mountains. But also because there's a girl I am, who is Canadian, she is in Canada. And we're both like in this really strong like situationship where we both like really love each other. Like we both like go and visit each other and go on hikes and go rock climbing and do all these awesome adventures together and. But she's living in a current like work living situation where she doesn't want to Leave. And I kind of don't really want to leave either to, like, try and get my Canadian citizenship. And, like, at the same time, it's just like, this weird disconnect of poor conversation or, like, poor communication her and I have. And I just don't know if I should try and move to Canada to be closer to her and, like, jump through all these hoops to try and be with her and, you know, like, maybe her and I don't work out in the long run, and then I'm in Canada and I don't really want to be in Canada anymore, but I've, like, worked so hard to get there. Or do I just stay here and keep living separate from her and, you know, keep seeing each other, like, maybe once a month and. I don't know. Yeah, yeah. So it's just kind of like general, broad terms of I don't know where to go from here and, like, like, if I should be Canadian, I don't.

[Lyle]

Know if I should become Canadian.

[Loofah]

Yeah.

[Lyle]

So you moved to Montana to be closer to this girl? Because Montana is near Canada. Is she near Montana? Ish.

[Loofah]

Yes. Yeah. We're five hours drive away from each other, so I'm like, an hour south of the border. She's like, four hours north of the border.

[Lyle]

But then how can't you hang out in Canada for a fair amount of time? Time, like, don't. Isn't there a tourist visa you can get Same with, you know, to the U.S.

[Loofah]

Yeah, yeah, like, there is, like, a visa. Well, there's like, a really expensive travel visa. I think that, like, you can only, like. That's only good for, like, two years, and after that, I think you just have to leave. But I think I could, like, get my permanent residency through my work maybe. But, yeah, I guess, like, I don't know, like. Like one of the big, like, cruxes of it all. And it's like, I just don't know if. If, like, if I moved and, you know, did all this work, if she would be, like, like, committed to, like, stay with me. I don't know. I don't know. It's just something that I need to talk with her about. But.

[Lyle]

How old are you guys?

[Loofah]

We're both 28.

[Lyle]

And how'd you meet her?

[Loofah]

We met hiking on the Arizona trail in Arizona.

[Lyle]

Cool. Cool. How long have you guys known each other?

[Loofah]

Like, two years now. See, we met. Yeah. In 2023 in the middle of the desert.

[Lyle]

And this is not like, girlfriend with a capital G.

[Loofah]

No, no. Which is another confusing thing. Like, we haven't made anything, like, official, but we really enjoy seeing each other. Like, we plan to meet each other very often and we do see each other very often, but it's nothing like official. Like, she says, if I were to be able to live with her, then we would, like, she'd be comfortable with, like, being official. So do you really.

[Lyle]

Do you really like this girl? Do you see a future with her?

[Loofah]

I really do. Yeah. I do. Like, we have, like, similar, I guess. Well, for sure, things that we love to do. We love to be outside and adventure together and bird watching. Like, but more than that, like, we just have similar, you know, humors and just have similar values and, you know, want kind of the same thing out of life. So I do, like, really love her, and she, you know, says that she loves me.

[Lyle]

What is it that you guys both want out of life?

[Loofah]

I guess, really just to have, like, a base camp somewhere that's, like, in, like, nature, you know, not have kids, but to just have some kind of base camp where we can, you know, make just enough money to have a lot of free time to go explore and do cool things and then to come back, you know, to our headquarters and just. Yeah. Like, live life there and, like, do it all over again. You know, go and leave for six months and go, like, hike and explore and. Yeah, yeah, just do that again, you know.

[Lyle]

So you want to live? Yeah, like a little. Like six months traveling, six months hanging out at your base camp?

[Loofah]

Yeah, yeah, for sure.

[Lyle]

Sounds awesome.

[Loofah]

Yeah. Kind of a random segue, but I remember when you and the. Oh, my gosh, what's his name, Something. Merlin. The guy that you went to Japan with.

[Lyle]

Jason. Jason Sensei. Martian.

[Loofah]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was watching y'all stream on the last day of Yalls Walk.

[Lyle]

Yeah, yeah.

[Loofah]

And I was the one that mentioned Heelys. You by chance remember that?

[Lyle]

I do. I vaguely remember that. Yeah. Yeah.

[Loofah]

Hell yeah. Yeah.

[Lyle]

That had nothing. Had nothing to do with the rest of our conversation, did it?

[Loofah]

Correct.

[Lyle]

Okay, that's totally fine. I was just making sure. I was just making sure. I didn't know if you had anything else, you know. So this base camp, would it be in Canada?

[Loofah]

Probably. Yeah. Yeah. Like, she's kind of turned off on the idea of being American, like, especially right now, but. And also, like, it'd be cool to not pay for expensive health care, you know, like in the U.S. yeah.

[Lyle]

You becoming Canadian is the better. The better deal, right?

[Crazy]

Yeah.

[Loofah]

Like, mainly just not having to be tied down to a job for health care.

[Lyle]

Right?

[Loofah]

Now is. Yeah. Like, a pretty lucrative thing.

[Lyle]

That's so sick that they just do that. You just don't have to pay for health care.

[Loofah]

Right, Right. Like, that sounds amazing. Like, I guess there are, like, some way that you do pay for it, that everybody pays for it, like, through taxes.

[Lyle]

Right.

[Loofah]

But it must be much cheaper than, you know, getting injured, breaking your leg without insurance, being slapped with a bill for a bajillion dollars here.

[Lyle]

I feel for you on this situation, brother. Love is difficult, and making things. Things like this work is difficult, and it's. And. And everything you described to me, like, being so aligned on the future that you guys want to have, and everything is. Sounded really, really compelling and really, really touching. And so you're worried about going through the whole process, and then it just doesn't work out. What does that mean? It just doesn't work out.

[Loofah]

Oh, man. Like, I just feel like.

[Crazy]

She.

[Loofah]

I don't know. Like, for one, we just have kind of not the best, like, communication. Like, we'll talk. Like. Like, I will typically bring up the fact that, like, hey, like, kind of weird telling everyone that I know that you're just my friend when, like, it's kind of obvious, you know, like, we're more than friends. Like, it's. And, like, you know, whenever we. Whenever I bring up kind of that and just have. Try to start harder conversations. Like, she just kind of has no input, just kind of, like, bottles up and doesn't really want to talk about it.

[Lyle]

Yeah.

[Loofah]

You know?

[Lyle]

Yeah.

[Loofah]

And, like, it's hard, too, because I honestly don't. Haven't talked to anyone about this, and, like, it does, you know, just seem like, kind of like there are some general red flags and, like, I don't know, like. Like, I'm just. I just had this, like, gut feeling of, you know, maybe she might go meet someone else who, you know, like, has a situation like her. Like. Like, where they can take off months at a time, and, like, you know, she just leaves me for. For them. And, you know, like, her not being committed to me, like. Like, would seem like a validation for her to just go and do that, you know, to just leave me for someone else.

[Lyle]

Mm.

[Loofah]

Yeah. And I don't know if I want to. I've gone, like, back and forth with, like. I don't know. I don't. I don't. Yeah. There's just some other things to it that is, like, we're both not proud of. Yeah.

[Lyle]

Is it? Yeah. You know, whatever. You don't have to talk about it, but you Know, do you feel like you've expressed all your honest feelings to this person?

[Loofah]

I feel like I have not told her what I just told you I've not told her, but I just told you.

[Lyle]

Yeah. What. What specifically? What specifically? That you feel like she's. The communication's bad.

[Loofah]

That. And that she would just leave me for someone else if she were to meet someone that she likes more?

[Lyle]

Well, that's more of, like, I guess I'm playing complete armchair psychologist, and I'm. I'm truly actually horrible with relationships and relationships matters and whatnot, but just from my gut, it's like. I don't know, something about that is like. That's more of, like, a insecurity, I think, than it is like a actual, like, oh, this. This is like a thing that we need to communicate on and get an answer about. Right. You know, cuz. Just. Just saying, like, oh, I'm worried you're gonna leave me for someone else. It's like, you know, I don't know how she's supposed to respond to that. Like. But, like. Like, the thing. The thing that you said where you're like, hey, listen, are we. You know how. The thing. The thing where you're basically like, look, how committed are you to actually fucking doing this shit? You know, that prompts a response. So, I mean, that's worth talking about. Wither. But yeah, the other. The other thing, I guess again, I'm. No, what. What's that lady's name who says stuff but I'm not her. But yeah, the other one seems. Seems just kind of like an insecurity. Like, I don't know if it needs to explicitly be brought up, unless if you, like, actively have, like, ever believe that she is, like, cheating on you, you know, like, you don't want to be, like, accuser. You don't. You don't want to be, like, accusatory, but you do want to be like, hey, right, I'm. You know, you don't be accusatory, but you do kind of want to be like, hey, look, if we're gonna do this, I kind of need this. What do you think about that?

[Loofah]

That's a good point. Yeah.

[Cody]

Yeah.

[Loofah]

That maybe the specific thing of her being with someone else is just kind of a. Like, more of like an insecurity, maybe on my part, where it doesn't prompt, like, a response. Mm. Yeah. But I mean. Okay. And then here's another kind of twist to it. She definitely has been with someone else, like, last year. Like, she just, like, hooked up with someone and she told me. And like, I, you know, like, asked and it hurt. Like. And it's like a complicated thing because she's, like, not even talking to him anymore. And. And like, you know, like, we're.

[Crazy]

Like.

[Loofah]

I know, like, we're not, like, you know, officially dating, but we also, you know, like, both, like, don't want to stop seeing each other, you know, it's just like. I don't know. I don't know. It's all very complex, but. But simple.

[Lyle]

Yeah. Yeah, now I get you on the complex but simple, my brother. We have all been in situations like this where we're like, yeah, this is not a movie romance. This is a fucking. A formis thing. Unlabeled and on defined and, you know. Yeah, be. Being in purgatory with someone sucks, right? It sucks ass. It's not fun. It's not really fulfilling. And it's. It is filled with tons of emotional drain and pain. So I, you know, I feel you on that. I would say again, in this situation, okay, so she hooked up with another guy, but. So she hooked up with another guy because there was no formal or even informal understanding of exclusivity between the two, which you. Do you agree upon that or is that not true?

[Loofah]

No. So your question is she hooked up with him because her and I are not exclusive, right? Like, because of that?

[Lyle]

Not. No, not because. Not. Not because. But she felt that it was not a problem because of that. Yeah.

[Loofah]

Maybe. And like, that's what. I don't know, you know, like, if she. She thought it wasn't a problem because of that.

[Lyle]

Look, man, let me ask you, because we could go in circles about this shit, right? Is like, do you. What information do you need from. From this lady? Or is it a matter of, like, what information do you need from this lady right now that you don't have?

[Cody]

I.

[Loofah]

I don't know. I guess just like some kind of, like, commitment that, like, if I were to work towards moving to Canada and being to Canada, that she wouldn't just, like, leave me for someone else.

[Lyle]

It's like, yeah, if I'm going on the fucking website and I'm converting American dollars to your, you know, fucking Canada money, and I'm like, submitting applications and doing papers and going to the embassy if I. If I'm doing all this shit. You are my girlfriend. I'm not doing all this stuff for a, you know, friends with benefits situation. This is. This seems. Yeah, sort of what I'm hearing for sure. Yeah. So, I mean, shit, brother, let me Tell you, I, I, I know that making these kinds of decisions and, and identifying deal breakers is fucking really scary and hard because you're like, well, what if she doesn't want to do that? It's like, well, then am I gonna have the strength to walk away? It's fucking insanely difficult. You form a strong attachments to people and, and you, you look back at, you know, you don't always time, you don't wanna be alone, all this stuff. Like, I get it, I've been there. But a bunch of everyone's fucking listening has probably been there. But yeah, I mean, it sounds like, you know, kind of what you want from this lady and then it's just a matter of telling her, seeing how she responds, and deciding whether or not you're satisfied with her, her response.

[Loofah]

Yeah, yeah, for sure.

[Cody]

Yeah.

[Loofah]

Just, it'd be a huge life change and, you know, there's some big conversations that go with that, you know.

[Lyle]

Yeah, well, yeah, dude, I mean, being, being like, hey, I'll do this for you. If you actually are like, committed to making this life that we've been talking about, wanting to live together. But if you're just like, oh, it would be cool if you came. I'm not gonna fucking be, I'm not gonna change my nationality for that.

[Loofah]

Right, right. Like, and like, I've even told her too, like, nothing would change if we were like, you know, dating. You know, like, it would still be cool to be like in, you know, an open relationship where we, like, communicated and, you know, told each other what was going on. Yeah. Like, I don't know, spice some, some things up sometimes. Like, but I'm sorry.

[Lyle]

Well, well, well, look, look, look, look, look. Someone in the chat said, do not under any circumstances move to Canada chasing a woman. Then someone said Gordon Lightfoot had whole albums about this. I know that means, I don't know, man. Listen, here's, here's, I think we've been going a little bit in circles on this, but I'll say that, yeah, you know, it sounds like you have some, it sounds like you have some, some conversations that you got to have with this lady. And then after those conversations, you gotta fucking, you gotta deep breathe, get high, look yourself in the mirror and go, what do I actually want? What do I actually want my fucking stupid life to be? Like, those are hard questions to answer. These are really hard questions to answer. But from, from everything. If my life was your life, that's what I would be doing. This is asking myself those questions. And, and with my life Being my life. I'm asking myself these kinds of questions. So you're not alone in your imperfect navigation of the scary universe. I hope that makes you feel any bit better about the decision making process. Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go, man?

[Cody]

Gosh.

[Loofah]

It'S so strange to hear you say that. And now I'm responding to it, man. I just want to say that your podcast has been just a really, just for one, like, really entertaining platform, you know, like, it's really just gotten me through some hard times and it's just been fun to hear you continue, you know, everything that you've been doing and see travel and. Yeah, yeah, it's been awesome to follow along. And I guess what I'd like to finish with is that just remember that everything is temporary, you know, like everything. Like the good and the bad times throughout life, like if there's some shitty thing that is happening, like just know that it's going to end. And if there's some awesome times that you're going through, just, you know, like, remember that times won't always be awesome and just. Just enjoy the good times while they're here and know that the bad times will eventually end as well.

[Lyle]

What's your name again, man?

[Loofah]

My trail name is Loofah.

[Lyle]

Loofah.

[Loofah]

That's my name.

[Lyle]

Loofah. Good luck with your life, buddy. I'll talk to you later.

[Loofah]

Thanks, Lyle. Have a good night.

[Lyle]

Thank you, Loofah. Thank you for sharing. Cool.

[Loofah]

See ya.

[Lyle]

Have a good one, man.

[Loofah]

Good night.

[Lyle]

Fuck, man, I. I feel for that guy. I called him buddy because that felt Canadian, you know, I. I feel for that guy. I feel for that guy. It's so hard to. I don't know, it's hard to make decisions. Sometimes I wonder about that though. Sometimes I wonder if a decision is hard to make. Maybe that's kind of informs your answer a bit, right? Does that make sense? Is that a stupid thing to say? Because some decisions are easy to make. There's an easy decision to. Wow. It's the last easy decision I made. Oh, they were giving out samples at Costco today. Ice cream with a cookie in it. That was an easy decision to make, to eat that because it was just a little scoop of ice cream. It wasn't anything crazy. Yeah, that's if that was a horrible example. But you know what I mean, some decisions are easy to make. So maybe if a decision is hard to make, that's. That's your answer. I don't know. I'm a gecko. Thank you for listening to my Therapy Gecko podcast. Thank you for your continued support of my lizard endeavors. I feel really good today. I feel really good about continuing to do this podcast and I'm extremely grateful to you guys for listening to the show. And I'm gonna keep doing the show and I'm gonna keep trying to do other things. That's my goal right now. I'm like trying so fucking hard to figure out other stuff to keep doing with my life. I'm always chasing. I'm always wanting to do more shit. I'm always wanting to chase more. I'm editing a video right now about the 50 mile walk I took. It was referenced in the episode with Jason, AKA Sensei Martian. So that'll be out when I finish it. I'm working on continuing to not go insane. We had some pretty good progress on that recently over the past three days. I'm back to smoking weed, which actually is good. It means that my brain is in a place where I can handle it. I'm. I still have dreams and hopes for the future that I want to do. I have business ideas that I want to do and events that would be cool. And I was hanging out with my dad last night. My dad's 67 years old and he showed me this big list of projects that he wants to get done. And I was like, ah, fuck, I'm gonna be like, it's in my DNA to wanna do stuff. I'm gonna be 30 years from now still trying to be doing stuff and making YouTube videos and whatever. And the reason I said oh fuck is because I don't know why I associate with, I associate that with like never being satisfied. But baby, you know what? Which is a blessing and a curse because it kind of curses you with like forever all is never ending sense that you didn't do your homework and it's due tomorrow night. And you know, kind of that feeling every day. But you know, look, that feeling causes you to kind of lights a fire under your ass. To be. Be a present and conscious contributor to your own life and to hopefully the world. So I'm gonna try to embrace it instead of letting it drive me completely fucking insane. Alright, thank you for listening to the podcast, Geck. Bless you. Catch you in a few days. Bye. Hello folks, it's Lyle here. That's the end of this episode. But get this, I'm releasing a bonus episode this week. That's right, an entire extra hour of the podcast that you can listen to by becoming a Premium member of Therapy gecko over at therapygecko.supercast.com Supercast subscribers get access to bonus episodes. They get a completely ad free podcast feed of the regular show. They get recordings from my live shows members only streams and they help support my ability to continue doing this podcast. So here's a clip from this week's members only bonus episode.

[Cody]

Well, I want to talk about my oldest daughter. Mainly it's just my wife and I for the past couple of years. We just feel like, like maybe we.

[Loofah]

Babied her too much.

[Cody]

It just seems like at this age she still isn't able to get a hold of her emotions. You know, we have a five year old as well. My oldest is eight, my youngest is five. And like, you know, you're not supposed to pick favorites, but it's hard not to think of the other one as the good one. And, and not that we love the other one more, but it's very hard for us to like not have.

[Lyle]

Listen, this is here, okay? If you love one of your children more than the other, you can tell us. If you want to hear this full conversation, you can sign up to become a premium [e-mail] or find the link in the episode description. That's therapygecko.supercast.com Alright, I have nothing else to say. Teaching you how to to live your life. But he's not really an expert. Hey folks. This episode is sponsored by ChatGPT Plus. ChatGPT plus is free for college students now through May. That means you have no limits on how many ways you can prompt ChatGPT to help you through the worst part of the school year. There's many ways you can do this, like uploading your class notes and having ChatGPT quiz you on them. Or asking ChatGPT to take a complicated concept and try to explain it to you in simpler terms to help you understand. ChatGPT free for college students through May. Restrictions apply.

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[Cody]

Com.

[Walton Goggins]

Terms apply.