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Host 1 (likely male)
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Host 2 (likely female)
Sure, they seem scary, but they only exist in books. And what do we do to books? We read them. And today we're reading all about Stephen Miller. We're learning all about his past. And we're learning a little bit about the woman who loves him. Because she made this lady angry. And when you make this lady angry, she opens tabs. How many tabs?
Host 1 (likely male)
Too many times.
Host 2 (likely female)
Remember to smile. Welcome to Too Many Tabs, a podcast where a husband and wife duo sit next to each other at a table
Host 1 (likely male)
and we talk a lot of sass.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, this week? This week is. We're reading. Yeah, we're reading.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh, it's going to be gossip, it's going to be drama, and it's going to be talking shit. But guess what?
Host 2 (likely female)
What?
Host 1 (likely male)
There's big news that you need to share with the audience.
Host 2 (likely female)
That's right. I do need to share because I am going on Tour with Phil DeFranco to probably a city near you, if you were in the continental United States. That's right. Crashing Out Live is traveling all across the United States. We have so many different places we're going to, and we're trying to add more, but. But you can find out more information by going to crashing out tour.com. and I'm going to go ahead and put a little hint to everybody, okay. If this goes well, if me and Phil DeFranco touring the nation and doing a podcast does well and it's. It's a good time, maybe. Maybe I can convince someone else.
Host 1 (likely male)
Podcast could go do a tour. Maybe.
Host 2 (likely female)
Maybe.
Host 1 (likely male)
Just depends.
Host 2 (likely female)
Maybe. But that's also why I'm wearing my Crashing out stay angry merch today. Cause I know Mrs. P. Listen, to convince Mrs. P to let me to wear a different podcast merch, even though it's still a podcast I'm on, was difficult for too many tabs. But that being said.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Now that we got all that out of the way and people can go to crashing outdoor.com to find out more information and to see exactly which city we're going to.
Host 1 (likely male)
Tickets to Pittsburgh.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, yeah. Listen, Pittsburgh. I'm coming.
Host 1 (likely male)
We got Pittsburgh.
Host 2 (likely female)
He coming. Pittsburgh. Okay, listen. Yeah. What is today about? I.
Host 1 (likely male)
Today is about talking shit.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay. Because some woman, Katie Miller. Do you know who that is?
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, I know who Katie Miller is.
Host 1 (likely male)
Katie Miller got on this Internet.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
She got on the Internet. Beyonce's Internet.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
And she said that liberal men are ugly. She said they're unattractive. Oh.
Host 2 (likely female)
And she said.
Host 1 (likely male)
And I said, katie Miller, hold up. If I remember correctly, you're married to Timu Nosferatu. Okay. You're Latin. Nosferatu. Crack it.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
And you're going to have opinions about other men's attractiveness.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. She looks like she basically goes down on Gollum.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yes.
Host 2 (likely female)
In, like, the worst way possible.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
She. She makes decisions poorly.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And then she wants to talk about liberal men like me. And now listen, am I out here saying that I am the top of manliness? No. I'm not doing any of this different stuff. But for her to be throwing around an ugly stone.
Host 1 (likely male)
Listen.
Host 2 (likely female)
In the ugliest glass house we ever did see.
Host 1 (likely male)
He looks like a foreskin. Okay. Your husband looks like. Listen, I'm not gonna get into that right now, okay. But it's gonna come out.
Host 2 (likely female)
Her husband is Stephen Miller.
Host 1 (likely male)
Her husband, Stephen Miller. Just so you know, a picture of the ugliest dweeb Around.
Host 2 (likely female)
But here. Here's what's fun. Here's what's fun, actually, about this whole thing is when she posted that. Yeah, right. I did pull it.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
When she posted. Had 4.6 thousand likes.
Host 1 (likely male)
4,000 likes.
Host 2 (likely female)
4,000 likes.
Host 1 (likely male)
Not a lot.
Host 2 (likely female)
But then a Democratic congressman from Michigan.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay.
Host 2 (likely female)
He literally was like, you fuck this, and posted him 142,000 likes on the dunk.
Host 1 (likely male)
Because we can all agree that the ratio is correct.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, the ratio is correct.
Host 1 (likely male)
She had three kids with that guy.
Host 2 (likely female)
Hmm.
Host 1 (likely male)
She got into that three times.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, well, I mean, but maybe they're all his. We don't know. There's been accusations thrown around. Okay. Because people also claim that she's not only into him, but she's also into Elon. Whoa. Yeah. There's been rumors about Katie Miller and Elon for a while because, yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
They're like, yeah, she has the worst taste in dicks.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, well, she. She likes to get doge. You know? Listen, I'm just saying.
Host 1 (likely male)
I'm just saying this episode is about making fun of her for saying that.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
But what happened was I got on the Internet and I was. How dare you ever say anything about anybody else when you're sleeping with the ugliest man inside and out? The thing is, he's ugly on the inside, too. Well.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
And so what I did was I just wanted to see who the fuck Stephen Miller is. Let's go over his past. Let's. Let's see where he started and how it's going and how they got introduced. Got it.
Host 2 (likely female)
Got it.
Host 1 (likely male)
That's what I want to do.
Host 2 (likely female)
Can I just tell you, I love the fact that because Katie Miller has a podcast, too.
Host 1 (likely male)
She does.
Host 2 (likely female)
She does. It's. You know what it's called.
Host 1 (likely male)
You like how I did no research on this bitch.
Host 2 (likely female)
I know, I know. And I know about her just tangentially from people like you and Suzanne Lambert talking shit on her all the time. Yeah. But. Yeah, she has a podcast called the Katie Miller Podcast.
Host 1 (likely male)
Terrible name.
Host 2 (likely female)
So this is. This is Podcast V. Podcast right now. Okay. That's what we're doing. Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay, good.
Host 2 (likely female)
Because she talked that shit on your husband by saying that liberal men are ugly.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
So now you're gonna talk shit on her husband by just saying that?
Host 1 (likely male)
Just talking about. Yeah. That's your husband.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, that's your husband.
Host 1 (likely male)
You married this.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. You married this crazy, weird Nazi.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay, Stephen Miller.
Host 2 (likely female)
Stephen Miller. We can't realize. We can't hit the no Nazi guarantee button.
Host 1 (likely male)
You absolutely cannot.
Host 2 (likely female)
We don't have we have been trying to figure out a way to hit
Host 1 (likely male)
that button is a difficult button to hit in 2026, especially not for Stephen Miller.
Host 2 (likely female)
No, not for him.
Host 1 (likely male)
Who was born Aug. 23, 1985.
Host 2 (likely female)
He's younger than us.
Host 1 (likely male)
He's younger than us.
Host 2 (likely female)
He's younger than us.
Host 1 (likely male)
He's younger than us. He got no hair. He's ugly.
Host 2 (likely female)
Hold on, hold on. What? He's younger than us.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay. For the audience, listeners, he's just flouncing his beautiful, luxurious red curls around. Okay.
Host 2 (likely female)
He's just younger than us. Hold on. He's younger than us. Wow, wow, wow.
Host 1 (likely male)
What was that like for you, Alec?
Host 2 (likely female)
That felt good.
Host 1 (likely male)
I couldn't do that. My hair. I got one hair on my head that felt placed very specifically.
Host 2 (likely female)
Listen. That felt good. You see this, Steve? It's called natural. All you have to do, Steve, is not be a fucking bigot.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And your skin looks good. Your hair grows back in. Yeah, go ahead.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay. So he was born into a rich, fancy neighborhood in Santa Monica, California.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay, that is insane already. Yeah, it's already insane to be in Santa Monica, which is already like pretty close to like a paradise. Yeah, like, the weather's always nice. There's just.
Host 1 (likely male)
The weather is always nice.
Host 2 (likely female)
There's just attractive people everywhere.
Host 1 (likely male)
The joke is it's always sunny in Philadelphia is. Because it's never foging sunny.
Host 2 (likely female)
So gray here all the time.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah, sometimes also when the sun is out, that's when the more chaos begins.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. Actually when, when the sun comes out, then you just hear dirt bike kids go by. Yeah. But Santa Monica is like beautiful. There's an Everclear song about it. That's good. Yeah, there's. I just picture when I hear Santa Monica, I picture like people. Maybe I'm picturing Venice beach, but I do picture like rollerbladers.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Like, you know, I mean, like I
Host 1 (likely male)
just pictured that if you grew up in a well to do family in a nice neighborhood in Santa Monica, you might be chill. You should be. You might have had so much privilege in life that you would just be chill.
Host 2 (likely female)
You should be.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay. It also said. Now this is from Wikipedia. The Wikipedia said, he is the second of three children. Which is the nicest way to say you're the fudgeing middle child. You're the middle child. The second of three children. The middle child.
Host 2 (likely female)
Now, real fast, real fast. I do want to say, because we are going to be probably insulting one of history's greatest monsters here, Stephen Miller, a lot if you feel like any of these jokes are targeted at you because you ourselves are a middle child. No, we just know that it bothers Steve that he wasn't first.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. Oh, no. If I say anything mean about looks, the way people, Their bodies look, this is specifically about Katie and Steven Miller. Nobody else.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
And they are helping commit crimes against humanity across this country that we don't. We can't even track yet.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
We don't even have the complete understanding of the horrors he and his wife are committing in this country. And therefore, I'm going to say she got a fat, ugly face and her Botox is bad. And that's not about anybody else. She looks like John Fetterman in a cheap shake and go from Amazon or. Okay. And that's not about you listeners or viewers. That's about her ugly ass face. Okay. Don't take it personal. It's not about you. It's about them. Got it? All right, that's my warning for the whole episode.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Stephen Miller was born of Ashkenazi Jewish descent.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
His family lineage escaped the Russian pogroms and the Holocaust. Holocaust. And they all immigrated to America. He is from a family of immigrants who. Who fled dangerous areas to the safety of America.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. Because he's from Eastern Europe. But it's probably very similar to my family.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Because my family is from. At the time when we left, it was Russia. But then later, after the Soviet Union fell, we were then informed it was actually. Now it's Ukraine.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. I think it might be Belarus area.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. It's like Belarus, Ukraine. There was, like, a whole contingent of Jews in that area, and they were heavily killed in the Holocaust. They dealt with pogroms heavily. The reason why my family left, they just kept burning our village down.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
It's just. That's the story that I've been told. If you want more information, watch Fiddler on the Roof.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. You know, they were. They were kidnapping people from their home. Yeah. Putting them in prison.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Killing them indiscriminately.
Host 2 (likely female)
Sending secret police into their neighborhoods and terrorizing them.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. So you think. You'd think.
Host 2 (likely female)
You'd think. You'd think that. You wouldn't be like, write that down. We're going to do that. Write that down. We got to do that. When that happened to your own family, you would think that.
Host 1 (likely male)
Miller's mother, Miriam, graduated Columbia University and became a social worker.
Host 2 (likely female)
What? Shut the up. His mom was a social worker.
Host 1 (likely male)
Social worker.
Host 2 (likely female)
A social worker. Okay, okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
She. When she was growing up, she described.
Host 2 (likely female)
Can I catch. Real fast. Real fast. Miriam, you're A failure of a mother. I'm gonna put that on you. I'm putting that one on you. I'm sorry. You're a failure of her mom.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah, we're the whole family. We're taking. Listen.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay. So she describes the family as New Deal Democrats, but also that they had pretty conservative views. Because they're rich. Yeah, they just have those rich people. Conservative.
Host 2 (likely female)
They got the extra comma.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Once. Once you get the second comma in your. In your savings account.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Instantly you're like, well, I'm more of a fiscal conservative.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. Liberal. Liberal, yes.
Host 2 (likely female)
Suddenly you start looking, what are they putting in their shopping carts with my money?
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
You know, it's a. Lunatics.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay, Now I. Here's what happens. Okay. So now we know where he was born, about his family, his family's history. We know that he is younger than us.
Host 2 (likely female)
I wish he went out to us
Host 1 (likely male)
and looks aged beyond his years due to the force of hate that lives inside of him. Like, does Sauron age people?
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, well, it's like the ring in general does, but also, like, you know. You know, evil and power corrupts people incredibly and it begins to visibly show on them. Um, I always thought that. I mean, I knew that he was on the younger side for, like, these people, but I didn't know that he was younger than me. Yeah, it's very upsetting. I thought he was, like, a hard 48.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Not a difficult 41. You know what I mean? Like, that fucking is insane. Also, I just want to just go back to the song Santa Monica by Everclear. Like, I wish he swam out past the breakers and then just didn't. Just left the world behind. That would be great.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah, I've been great. Okay. So I found an interview with someone who was a classmate of his in third grade.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay. All right.
Host 1 (likely male)
Do you know how. What an impression you have to leave on somebody that they remember you from the third grade?
Host 2 (likely female)
I don't remember anyone from the third grade.
Host 1 (likely male)
No.
Host 2 (likely female)
I think I remember a couple of kids, like, from my bus, but I couldn't tell you if they were in my class.
Host 1 (likely male)
The only reason I remember people from. From my third grade is because we did one to eight together because I went to Catholic school. So you do one to eight together, and then when you go to high school, they separate you. All girls and all boys. Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
So I only know the names of the third grade class because it was the same in my eighth grade class.
Host 2 (likely female)
What was crazy for me is third grade is, like, my school district. Like, did a split and they added a school. So I went to this other school. So I won through, like K through 2. I was in one school.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Third, I went to another. Then I went to middle school. And then my middle school was a weird feeder to two separate high schools, so my middle school got cut in half. So I was always, like, gaining and losing people all the time. So literally, if you weren't on my bus.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
If you weren't on my bus and I did and you weren't still my friend or like, close to me by ninth grade.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
You're gone, buddy. You could walk up to me. Honestly, I'm going to throw this out there while I'm on tour. You could walk up to me and be like, we. We were in second grade together. I'd be like, sure.
Host 1 (likely male)
Sounds right.
Host 2 (likely female)
Probably.
Host 1 (likely male)
Maybe.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay. This guy named the elementary school.
Host 1 (likely male)
This guy was in third grade with Stephen Miller. And he remembers it very clearly, what it was like.
Host 2 (likely female)
Stephen Miller was such a crazy person that he has vivid memories of it.
Host 1 (likely male)
He describes that Stephen Miller's favorite hobby in third grade is that he was obsessed with putting glue on his hands and rubbing his hands together to create that peeling sensation.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
And would just like, peel his hands all day in class.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. Well, that's fun.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. That's.
Host 2 (likely female)
To be fair. Okay. That's like the least evil thing.
Host 1 (likely male)
They also.
Host 2 (likely female)
I'm just holding real fast. I just want to sit on this a little bit. Okay. Because you said it in like a way that was like, ah. Like that was cool.
Host 1 (likely male)
Let me finish the thought.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay, go ahead.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay. Because they also interviewed his third grade teacher who also remembered him. Do you know how many students a third grade teacher has to deal with that they would remember you? And she said he kept to himself, but she remembered that he was particularly dirty, ate dried glue off himself, and was reminiscent of the Peanuts character Pig Pen.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay. I need you to understand the elementary school teachers, for the most part, obviously, hashtag, not all elementary school teachers are our own particular level of angels.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
They are dealing with our children. And for the most part, they want to do the right thing.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And the fact that she looks back on her life and career, probably 30 years in the classroom and is like, I wish Elmer's glue had not been non toxic because of him. Like, there's a reason. Because I was gonna say, listen, I used to do that. We rub it.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. We all did it once in a
Host 2 (likely female)
while, peel it off, and it was fun.
Host 1 (likely male)
You don't make it your whole personality,
Host 2 (likely female)
not your Whole personality. So he was just globbing glue and just peeling it and eating?
Host 1 (likely male)
Yes.
Host 2 (likely female)
The classmate that I'm better than anybody with a different skin color than me is his feeling.
Host 1 (likely male)
The classmate that remembers this is the reason he remembers it is cause they shared a desk. They had one of those. Desk.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, it was like a desk table.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah, that's table. So a little cubby. What he remembered is that Stephen Miller was really dirty and gross, but every day he would get, like, tape and put it down the middle of the desk and, like, be like, you're not allowed to cross this boundary line.
Host 2 (likely female)
You're okay. So that is like, that's a sitcom trope. Like, that's from sitcoms. But also. You mean to tell me at eight fucking years old.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Stephen Miller was already obsessed with Borders?
Host 1 (likely male)
Yes. He was deep into border control at 8 years old. He's building a wall between him and his classmates with tape. Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
He was like, this is a line
Host 1 (likely male)
and you can't cross it. And the kid is like, I don't want it. You're dirty. Your side of the desk stinks.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. He literally is like, no, I'm on. This side is perfect. This is. I have Stephen Miller desk. Except exceptionalism. Over here, we don't fall for communism. Over there, you have universal glue. This is insane. Like, I just can't. Like, he was psychologically profiled at 8.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
To be a bad person.
Host 1 (likely male)
Do you want to see a picture from the third grade class? Because I have it.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
All right. This is him.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
That's Stephen Miller.
Host 2 (likely female)
Shitty kid.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. And this is the kid that was
Host 2 (likely female)
next to him in the tie dye. Yeah, in the tie dye.
Host 1 (likely male)
That's the cool kid.
Host 2 (likely female)
That is the. That's. Listen. Yeah, that's a cool kid, but also, that's a kid who's like, definitely doesn't want to remember sharing a desk with Stephen Miller.
Host 1 (likely male)
I picture that kid growing up to be like, what was his name? Like, Tyler or Kyle. Kyle Birkenstock from the. The Clueless movie. Oh, because, like, the Birkenstock, that's where
Host 2 (likely female)
you went with it. Okay, got it, got it. Yeah. Yeah, he does. He has kind of like a fish feel to him at 8.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah, that's what I mean.
Host 2 (likely female)
Like, kids wear tie dye. That's just. Tie dye is like a kid. But, I mean, that means. Speaks more to the parents. Also, again, it's Santa Monica. He looks like.
Host 1 (likely male)
I picture all the kids that are coming out of Santa Monica to grow up to be, like, birds.
Host 2 (likely female)
Because you're picturing all of them be like, also from Clueless. Because Clueless is set in California.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yes.
Host 2 (likely female)
Got it.
Host 1 (likely male)
Birkenstocks, Hacky Sacks, smoke and weed.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
I'm picturing if you grow up with enough, like, privilege and wealth, be chill, dude.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. They can't chill. He can't do that because I feel good about it. He has to keep someone else away from it.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
That's how it is. It's a zero sum game for conservatives.
Host 1 (likely male)
Miller has said that his turn to the right began in seventh grade. So he's saying that that behavior in third grade was not him being conservative or of the right.
Host 2 (likely female)
Him drawing a boundary. He said that him drawing a boundary and call in pretending that's a border that you cannot cross. And that he was highly protective of his items.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And refusing to let anyone else use it.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
That is not conservatism.
Host 1 (likely male)
No.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
No, no, no. He started getting into conservatism when he got a subscription to Guns and Ammo magazine in seventh grade.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay, I need. Okay, okay. All right. Just hold on. A seventh grader had a subscription to Guns and Ammo?
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
That's. Okay. All right.
Host 1 (likely male)
And then from Guns and Ammo, he found out about his. Who's going to be his new favorite guy? Rush Limbaugh.
Host 2 (likely female)
You know what? Okay. Now that you're introducing Rush Limbaugh, I need a break.
Host 1 (likely male)
We're going to take a little break.
Host 2 (likely female)
We're going to take a break, and when we get right back, we'll learn more about the childhood of Stephen Miller. Mother's day is Sunday, May 10, and 1-800-Flowers is here to make sure you don't forget. Which is good, because I had forgotten until I started reading this, because they're sponsoring today's episode and they want you to know at 1-800-FLOWERS, every bouquet is picked fresh, carefully packaged, and backed by a freshness guarantee.
Host 1 (likely male)
I recently ordered a bouquet.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
And it wasn't for myself, although I could get myself a Mother's Day bouquet if I wanted. But I ordered someone else one, and it was called the Daydream bouquet. And it was super pretty. It had, like, pink roses and lavender daisies. It was a very cute scene. I loved it.
Host 2 (likely female)
Right now, when you order one dozen roses, 1-800-flowers will double your bouquet to two dozen roses for free. That's twice the flowers for your mother or any special person in your life. Mother's day is Sunday, May 10th. The bouquets are selling out fast. Trust me. Don't wait to claim your double roses offer before they're gone. Visit 1-800-flowers.com Too many. That's 1-800-f l o w e r s.com/Too many. 1-800-flowers.Com/Too many. And just a reminder for everyone, Rush Limbaugh, just like Dick Cheney, is still dead.
Host 1 (likely male)
Nice.
Host 2 (likely female)
Just because when he gets mentioned, you're like, oh, this is terrible.
Host 1 (likely male)
But he is, but he did die.
Host 2 (likely female)
He's dead.
Host 1 (likely male)
He's dead in hell with Dick Cheney.
Host 2 (likely female)
He's in there and they're in hell together.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Looking up.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. Being like, man, a lot of exciting stuff's going on up there.
Host 2 (likely female)
And honestly, real fast, real fast, before we, before we get even deeper into Stephen Miller's life, to everyone out there, especially if you're working, if you're at your job right now, AirPod M. Stand up. Take a deep breath.
Host 1 (likely male)
Stretch.
Host 2 (likely female)
Roll your arms back. Roll your shoulders back. You know what I mean?
Host 1 (likely male)
Coffee.
Host 2 (likely female)
Remind yourself that you're alive.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay. And Rush Limbaugh is not.
Host 1 (likely male)
Absolutely.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay. So it's 1998, and Stephen Miller is 13. Okay.
Host 2 (likely female)
The terrible year.
Host 1 (likely male)
A terrible year.
Host 2 (likely female)
Being 13 sucks. I, I, it was, I'm lucky I got through it.
Host 1 (likely male)
Same.
Host 2 (likely female)
You know what I mean? Like, it's a bad time.
Host 1 (likely male)
But it got really bad for Stephen Miller because guess what?
Host 2 (likely female)
What?
Host 1 (likely male)
There was a lot of legal issues going on with his dad's company, and because of some random lawsuits or whatever, his parents are forced to downsize their life.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
And they had to sell their home and move to a smaller home in a less affluent area.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh, no.
Host 2 (likely female)
So they went from, what, they went from, like, upper class to, like, upper middle class.
Host 1 (likely male)
Literally. Literally. They had plenty of money. According to a biography that was written about Stephen Miller, his family went from having daily made a nanny money to once a week made a nanny money.
Host 2 (likely female)
Wait, okay, so they went from having a cleaning. They went from having a maid every single day.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
To having a cleaning lady.
Host 1 (likely male)
A weekly cleaning lady.
Sponsor/Ad Voice
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
That's Any complained about that a lot. A lot.
Host 1 (likely male)
Made his whole personality really changed him fundamentally as a.
Host 2 (likely female)
Fundamentally. Was somebody suing his dad for something?
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And then them, him not having a date. Daily person to scream at. To clean up after him.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Also, he really hated the housekeeper nanny. I didn't, I couldn't find the person's name, but apparently one of the housekeepers used to drive him to school. This is after the downsize.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
And when the housekeeper was driving him to school every day, she would take her car and he was so Embarrassed about being driven to school in what he described as a shitty car. That he. He felt that that was the greatest embarrassment.
Host 2 (likely female)
Take the bus. Take the bus, bitch.
Host 1 (likely male)
Also, your parents aren't paying her enough to have a decent car that's on them.
Host 2 (likely female)
But also. Yeah, that's fucking insane. Your parents. Number one, your parents don't care enough about you to fucking drive you yourself because nobody fucking cares. Number two, you're a fucking demon. Number three, you're pissed off. Why? Because she's driving a champagne colored Toyota towards her cells are hard. It's the 90s.
Host 1 (likely male)
She works for the Miller.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. She works for your parents, the cheap bastards. The fuck are you talking about? I'm so fucking. Oh God, he's the worst. Imagine being that cleaning lady.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And being like. And this is, by the way, this is your villain origin story.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
She couldn't afford a nice car to drive your lazy ass walk, bitch.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah, take the school bus. Take the regular bus. Also, if it's that big a deal, why she could. Why are your parents not letting her drive their car?
Host 2 (likely female)
Yo, why don't you make friends? Oh, do you ever think about that? You could have made friends. Carpool, motherfucker.
Host 1 (likely male)
Save the environment.
Host 2 (likely female)
No, you couldn't have done any of those things.
Host 1 (likely male)
Stephen Miller, get a skateboard. I feel like Santa Monica is a place where you have a skateboard and
Host 2 (likely female)
Katie Miller, you suck his dick. Oh, Jesus.
Host 1 (likely male)
Rough.
Host 2 (likely female)
That's insane.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh God. Oh, okay, what do the kids say? Gluck. Gluck. Okay, so Stephen. See, I got him the. Also, Stephen Miller was still recently on his parents phone plan according to himself because when the government tried to subpoena his phone records after January 6, he had his attorneys file a motion to stop the discovery because he was on his parents phone plan.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay, so I. Okay, so I can't front too hard on that one.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Because I was on my parents phone plan for a very long time. Yeah. In fact, you were on my phone plan for a little bit there too. Yeah. Until all there was, it was we're on there because with my. My dad had in for a very, very, very long time. He was grandfathered into an unlimited.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
On Verizon.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yep.
Host 2 (likely female)
And I was on the friends and family and everything was great. And then he. I brought you onto it. Yeah. Like this is great. Whatever, it doesn't matter. And I was like, I'll just pay you whatever a month to cover like our portion of it. And then my dad just started complaining about us using up like data or something. And we were getting throttled and eventually like we. I was like, fine, I don't want to hear it anymore. And so I pulled to a different plan.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
In like my mid-30s.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
It around probably pretty close to when he did.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And the thing that annoyed me at the time that was so annoying is I was like, this didn't make anything better for anyone.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
We just now are double paying Verizon.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Until we started this show and got a Mint Mobile sponsorship and now we use Mint Mobile.
Host 1 (likely male)
Should we cut to an ad?
Host 2 (likely female)
No, it's. We just did a sponsorship recently. We're not going to cut to an ad. But we just did the other one so we're going to listen. Just a heads up to everybody, there is a Mint Mobile sponsorship coming somewhere. Episode is sponsored by them. This is not that ad. Yeah, yeah, no, but I just, I can't talk shit on him. Still using his parents plan that lay in the life though it does speak to the fact that they co sign every single thing that he fucking does.
Host 1 (likely male)
Absolutely.
Host 2 (likely female)
Because he was still working in the Trump White House.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
If they, if he is on his parents fucking parent plan.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
On January 6, 2021. Yeah. That means he was on his parents plan the entire time.
Host 1 (likely male)
You'll never guess what we're planning.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Texting his parents.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Know what's going on.
Host 2 (likely female)
Fudgeing scumbag. That's insane. All right, go.
Host 1 (likely male)
Stephen Miller went to Hebrew school at Beth Sher Shalom. And the only reason I'm bringing this up is because his classmates were interviewed at a certain point and that they said that many people interviewed that were his classmates there said that he was an annoying contrarian.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, that sounds about right.
Host 1 (likely male)
Everyone remembers him as shitty.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yes. I love this. I, I love how many people they're able to find. And every single one I'm like, oh, that guy sucks. Sucks. So. What an asshole.
Host 1 (likely male)
And you know, is one thing, he's all ugly and I wouldn't have sex with that guy.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. Katie Miller.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. Okay, so right before high school, Stephen Miller breaks up with probably his only friend because we're not finding any other friends in all these.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, he had a friend this morning.
Host 1 (likely male)
He had a friend.
Host 2 (likely female)
He had a friend.
Host 1 (likely male)
Uh huh. Who was of Mexican descent.
Host 2 (likely female)
That's shocking.
Host 1 (likely male)
And before high school, Stephen Miller met up with him in person and said that they couldn't be friends anymore. And Miller explained to him the decision of not being his friend before anymore by attacking his height, his bad skin, his lack of confidence and his Mexican American Heritage. The friend described it as, quote, what he targeted was, looking back, an impressive feat of understanding about what I didn't like about myself. He went on to describe it as, quote, it was the opposite of empathy.
Host 2 (likely female)
I mean, he's done a lot of evil things. Stephen Miller's done a lot of evil things.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
This is going to rank up there.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Like, there's. How many stories are there of people, typically, you hear about it of women.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And girls when they were coming up. And it's around this time, that middle school to high school, junior high to high school phase, around 14, 15, where because of puberty, some people have taken off, some people have. And some people get acne real bad. They have looks, all those different things. But the fact that he also targeted race on top of all of that is so crazy. And to be staying there and being, like, attacking someone for being Mexican American in Santa Monica.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Like, that's insane. You're in St. Monica.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
No, sorry. Santa Monica. Because it's fucking California.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
It was Mexico.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yep.
Host 2 (likely female)
Like, this is insane.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
He's a lunatic.
Host 1 (likely male)
He's a lunatic.
Host 2 (likely female)
And also, that was, like, his only friend.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And he was like, you're not good enough for me.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. We can't go into high school as friends anymore.
Host 2 (likely female)
No.
Host 1 (likely male)
Because this is such mean girl behavior.
Host 2 (likely female)
Because he wanted white friends.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Because he want to write fence. Because he's a fucking Nazi.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay. In 1999, he begins attending Santa Monica High School.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay. That's a public school.
Host 1 (likely male)
It's a public school.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Now, one of his greatest hobbies as he's starting out high school, is he is bullying. It's like a group at the school called the Chicano Student Movement of Aztlan. I apologize. I said that wrong.
Host 2 (likely female)
Aslan.
Host 1 (likely male)
Aslan. Basically, it's a chapter at the school for Mexican and immigrant students that helps them find community.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Helps them navigate college prep, all this stuff. Right.
Host 2 (likely female)
It's very similar to, like, the black student unions.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
A lot of schools and things like that. It would be similar to, like, an LGBT group or any other ones, where it's a group of people to come together, to share resources, to build community, to have all this different stuff. And Steve hates it.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
I'm. I'm shocked by that. I'm shocked that he's. He hates the Mexican American group.
Host 1 (likely male)
He would go to where they were meeting and stand outside the door and scream in the door, speak English.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
I. I want to say.
Host 2 (likely female)
I'm not shocked by this. I want to say Something this.
Host 1 (likely male)
By the other high school students. And I listen. This is opinion Alleged only. This is a comedy history podcast. He didn't get punched enough. Okay. Sometimes you just got to get punched in high school. I got punched in high school. I punched other people in high school.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Sometimes you just got to get punched in high school, and maybe that was a problem looking back.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Somebody need to walk out of that class and just knock some sense in them. That's just an opinion.
Host 2 (likely female)
That's an opinion. That's an opinion.
Host 1 (likely male)
An opinion.
Host 2 (likely female)
Because now he's a deputy adviser for the White House, who is the one who's controlling our immigration policy and is currently sending children into Daily Detention Center, a place where Ms. Rachel Daly is calling for it to be closed because the children are being kept from medical care and being fed food with worms in it.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. And the young girls keep going missing.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. That's what Steve's in charge of now. He went from screaming, speak English. Outside of out. Outside of a Latino Chicano Student Union group, to stealing their children.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Legally. Through the federal government.
Host 1 (likely male)
And that's why we're not going to not talk shit on him. And. And his ugly wife.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
So one.
Host 2 (likely female)
And his nose that looks like a dick.
Host 1 (likely male)
He's got a dick nose like the Camel. The Camel cigarette Camel.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yes.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
He got a dick nose like Joe Camel.
Host 1 (likely male)
So one of the classmates that went to his school, her name is Cynthia Santiago. She was the first Latina president of the school's associated student body, and she is now currently an immigration defense lawyer who has been helping people impacted by Trump's travel bans.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. That poor woman. That poor woman. She. So her high school bully is currently terrorizing her entire community and everyone who looks like her.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
That's insane.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Because the thing is, is, like, listen, you'll be like, oh, you didn't say that. That he had ever interacted with her. If you were Mexican or brown at Santa Monica High School, I'm assuming that Steve Miller screamed at you at this point. He said to have had to have,
Host 1 (likely male)
or you would have heard it or
Host 2 (likely female)
added to the climate.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
To make things worse for you, he's definitely done that for America. So I can extrapolate that he did that to a high school, because that was just his experiment at a smaller level. This is fucking insane.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. You know what it is also, is that he, as I was, like, going through this. He's a nerd. He's a dork. He's a Dweeb.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
He is a doofus in every way.
Host 2 (likely female)
He loves Star Trek, and actually, he's been attacking modern Star Trek.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay, does he just not understand what Star Trek's about?
Host 2 (likely female)
No, he doesn't. He thinks it's because, like, he's one of these guys, like, who watched Revenge of the Nerds and didn't understand that the. When you watch a movie like Revenge of the Nerds or all these different things, especially about stuff that's set in the 80s and 90s about nerds being bullied by jocks, he didn't understand that it's. No. Because we should have acceptance and love for everyone.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Nerds should love jocks, and jocks should love nerds. Because we' all people.
Host 1 (likely male)
And then kiss.
Host 2 (likely female)
Then we should kiss. But we're all part of the universe looking back into itself, learning more about each other, and, you know, we're all God's children. All this stuff. Whatever, Whatever. Whatever. You want to go with all that stuff. Right. But he didn't see that. Instead, what he saw is. No, if we are in control, if nerds are the top of the conservative hierarchy, then the world will be better because nerds can then control the women.
Host 1 (likely male)
Ah, yes. See, the thing is that I, as I was doing all this research for about his youth is I realized that he was very specifically, like I said, a dweeb. But he was a bully. Yes. Then that's like, the craziest part is because usually, especially in the way that, like, it gets described of like, oh, I was an outcast. I was a nerd, bubba. And then he's like, just. He's the victim in the story, but he's not. He is a bully. He is Randall from recess.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Do you know what I'm talking about? Okay, I'm gonna put. I'm gonna make sure Mr. Third puts a picture up, because every time I think about him in high school and grade school is just Randall.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
And not Randall for Monsters Incorporated now, which does kind of similar as. Well, maybe it's the name Randall. Maybe we just associate the name Randall with really dork guy.
Host 2 (likely female)
Well, Randall bad. Randy good.
Host 1 (likely male)
Randy good.
Host 2 (likely female)
Randy is good. Randall is Randy Newman. Randy Newman. Yeah. It's pretty good.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. Because we watch a lot of Toy Story. But the thing is, the thing is, you need to keep in mind with guys like this, right. Having been a high school nerd and all those different stuff, there are lanes you find.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And where you go through like, this is like, some people, like, you learn how to get build up your self defense. All those different things. Like, for me, I took karate.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yep.
Host 2 (likely female)
And through karate, I learned, like, not only self defense, but I learned self esteem. And I learned, like, how to make. Find actionable goals and how to meet those goals and, like, understand how my body works, how my brain works. Learn de escalation. Like, there's all these different things that I learned that were more important than learning how to do a roundhouse kick.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
That I learned those things through karate and stuff like that. It sounds to me like what Steve learned was if I attack people, if I can create enough others, then I can try to band people to me, because we all hate the others. That's what it sounds like.
Host 1 (likely male)
His go to self esteem comes from doing esteemable acts.
Host 2 (likely female)
Wow. You hear that, Katie Miller?
Host 1 (likely male)
Just throw that out there.
Host 2 (likely female)
You hear that, Katie Miller?
Host 1 (likely male)
You get self esteem by doing esteemable acts.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
I'm just saying. Anyway, he wore a suit to school, like, every day.
Host 2 (likely female)
He was a suit kid.
Host 1 (likely male)
He was a suit kid.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, no.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, he's.
Host 1 (likely male)
He's behaving like this in a suit in high school.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, no. And he's not in the ska. No, he's not in the scar. Okay. Because there's. Listen, we got it. Not all suit kids. All right? Cause there's two types. Yeah, there are two types. There are suit kid, which is the Stephen Miller type, which is. I'm wearing a suit. But you should. Cause you should respect me because of who my father is.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
I'm wearing a suit because of that way I'm dressing for the job. I want those people. Fuck those people.
Host 1 (likely male)
I want to make a good first impression.
Host 2 (likely female)
Fuck you, you fucking nerd. You should get shoved into lockers. And then there's Scott kid. Ska kid's different.
Host 1 (likely male)
Ska kid's cool.
Host 2 (likely female)
Ska kid. He's. He's out here. He's just. He's listening. And not only is he listening to Scott, he doesn't just like a horn section. He likes the message of racial equality.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yep.
Host 2 (likely female)
He wants to skank and he knows no skinheads are allowed.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Stephen Miller is the opposite of a scar. Scoot. Suit kid.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah, riot. By the way, I just realized that Stephen Miller's body was like, you're a skinhead and just did that to him. Yo. Also the zoot suit kids, because this is like, 1989 and, like, zootsuit was having a. Yeah, so like, again, if you're a kid and you're coming in and your zoot suit riot outfit. Also cool.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. No Zootsuits. Are so cool. Also, again, we're in. We're in Santa Monica, which is Los Angeles.
Host 1 (likely male)
So many opportunities to be cool in Santa Monica.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay. But also beyond that, though, with zoot suits in particular. Zoot Suit Riot is a song about a literal riot that happened because they tried to ban zoot suits because they
Host 1 (likely male)
were part of the Hispanic culture.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yes. Because they're part of Mexican culture in Los Angeles.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yes.
Host 2 (likely female)
And they're like, that makes you part of a gang. And they're like, that's not what makes it us part of a gang. It's the gang that makes us part of a gang because we're being suppressed from other forms of employment and you're redlining our fucking communities. I'm sorry. There's a lot just unpacked in there. Yeah, but you know what? Let's unpack something else during this little break. Right after this. Say goodbye to overpriced phone bills when you switch to Mint Mobile. Same coverage, same speed, unlimited talk, text and data, all on the nation's largest 5G network. Mint Mobile plans start at just 15 bucks a month for three months. And I have to say, ever since we switched to Mint Mobile, it's been a game changer.
Host 1 (likely male)
Absolutely.
Host 2 (likely female)
It has helped us in our wallet, it has helped us make sure we still have good service. And honestly, it's just helped us feel good. Yeah, it's been an awesome time. Bring your current phone and number over to Mint. No long term contracts, no hassle. Mint makes it Easy with a 7 day money back guarantee. And I want to let you know that transfer of how to switch that phone number over super, super easy. If you like your money. Mint Mobile is for you. Shop plans@mintmobile.com tabs. That's mintmobile.com tabs upfront payment of 45 for three months. Five gigabyte plan required, equivalent to 15amonth. New customer offer for first three months only. Then full price plan options available, taxes and fees extra. See mintmobile.com for details. It feels like I called that ad. Yeah, I called that ad like long before it hit.
Host 1 (likely male)
Called the shot.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, I called. I was like Babe Ruth on that ad. I was like, Mint Mobile ads coming. Okay, ready? All right. So he was a suit kid. He was a suit kid in high school. Stephen Miller. Not the cool one of history's.
Host 1 (likely male)
The annoying kind.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. Not even history's greatest one. One of current events. Greatest monsters. Yeah, it goes like, it goes like Benjamin Netanyahu and then I think Stephen Miller because he's, he's really Helping with a lot of this.
Host 1 (likely male)
It's a lot of his ideas.
Host 2 (likely female)
A lot of these are his ideas. It's him sitting in the corner in a cuck chair after he's watched his wife suck Elon's dick. Allegedly. And then he looks up, he goes.
Host 1 (likely male)
So let me tell you about what he was a big fan of in high school.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay. Because you have people get into stuff, you get hobbies.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
You. You like certain music, you go to certain shows.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Stephen Miller is a huge fan of Larry Elder, the conservative talk radio guy.
Host 2 (likely female)
Wait, Larry Elder didn't. Larry. I think Larry Elder ran for governor of California quite a few times. He lost, like, hard a lot.
Host 1 (likely male)
I just. I can't get over the fact that, okay, we have a high school suit kid who's yelling at Latino and Hispanic students. He's bullying people. While the C is in the heart of 90s California culture. He could have been. He could have been seeing like STP live. He could have. He could have gone to all the coolest concerts. He could have been drinking Zima. He could have been touching boobs and doing skateboards. But instead he was just listening to conservative talk radio all day.
Host 2 (likely female)
He wasn't there either. Lily was in the middle of like the height of new metal.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yes. He could have been like, corn is from that area.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. I mean, I'm just saying.
Host 1 (likely male)
He could have seen one of the first corn concerts.
Host 2 (likely female)
Everyone else was. Everyone else was watching Total Request Live with Carson Daly.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yes.
Host 2 (likely female)
Everyone else was like listening to Ryan Seacrest on the radio. Right. Or Delilah or something like this. And this is in his. He. He is in his cleaning lady's car.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
In her. What I'm assuming is like an old beat up Toyota, probably champagne color, because it was very. It was very common at the time. The time.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And he was like, put on Larry Elder.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
It's like you, babe. The Destiny's Child is just starting.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh, my God.
Host 2 (likely female)
On every channel like this is.
Host 1 (likely male)
You can hear no Doubt with the windows down. You know what I'm saying?
Host 2 (likely female)
Well, you know what? He heard no Doubt and he made her conservative.
Host 1 (likely male)
That's what happened. Fuck her for.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, fuck. When Stefan.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
For a while, you know, you did.
Host 1 (likely male)
Lady built an entire brand off of appropriating every other culture.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay.
Host 2 (likely female)
Anyway, but now she's. That she's adding the final stone.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. That's Thanos stone.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yes. Her final. Thanos stone is appropriating Midwestern white conservatism. She was like, I'm done doing Japan. Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Like, I guess I'll untie these bantu knots from my hair.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, sorry. Let me clean the bindi dot off my forehead, you psycho.
Host 1 (likely male)
She. Her entire career is like a passport. Okay, so it's all the stamps. I was trying to write a joke.
Host 2 (likely female)
Got it. No, I understand.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay, so, okay. He loved the Elder Show. Larry Elder show. So much.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
That he even went on the show itself.
Host 2 (likely female)
Really?
Host 1 (likely male)
He appeared on Larry Elder show after the September 11 attack to talk about how schools weren't patriotic enough.
Host 2 (likely female)
Wait, okay, so, all right, that's. That was what he, as a high school student, goes on Larry Elder. He watches. Because he was probably like me where he watched it happen in school. Actually. He was West Coast.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
So they might have actually just not gone to school that day. So he might have watched it from home, but it doesn't matter.
Host 1 (likely male)
And then he calls in because. Oh, the thing is, is he's calling into the radio station all the time. Larry Elder knows who he is because he calls in so much. By Stephen Miller's own account, he called into the show at least 69 times.
Host 2 (likely female)
That is such a loser number to put. He's doing that on purpose.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Because you would say close to 70 or over 50 more. Yeah, over 50. 50 plus. I called in like 50 plus times like that, but it'd be like I called him 69.
Host 1 (likely male)
And then he tips his fedora in his suit.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Dork.
Host 2 (likely female)
You loser.
Host 1 (likely male)
Dork.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. And this is. This is who Katie Miller finds attractive, by the way.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
All right.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. She puts on. No, I was gonna say sexy lingerie, but that can't be true.
Host 2 (likely female)
No, that can't be.
Host 1 (likely male)
That can't be true.
Host 2 (likely female)
They just reach over and turn that light off. All right? That's what.
Host 1 (likely male)
They can't have the light on.
Host 2 (likely female)
No, you can't.
Host 1 (likely male)
You can't have the light on.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. Woof.
Host 1 (likely male)
Because then you're like, it is the Nosferatu. Like.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Like. Ah.
Host 2 (likely female)
There may have been a time where she looked down and thought that she was giving birth to the Antichrist. All right. That is a different thing altogether.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay.
Host 2 (likely female)
You figure out the visual.
Host 1 (likely male)
Don't, don't. We're not trying to put that in your brain.
Host 2 (likely female)
I am.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay, so he is so despised at high school. Everybody hates this kid.
Host 2 (likely female)
Everyone hates him.
Host 1 (likely male)
He is Randall from recess. The only person that likes him is the teachers. Maybe. Because I don't think the teachers like them either. His third grade teacher didn't even like him.
Host 2 (likely female)
No, because I'm gonna tell you why they didn't his teachers definitely didn't like him because my mom was a teacher. And kids like this are so. They're beyond disruptive.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
They also have main character energy and main character syndrome. Yeah. Everyone needs to bend to their will. All this other different. And this is the thing that happens, like, all the time. Because at the end of the day, a teaching is just a job. And you are just trying to. You're working for the weekend at a certain point.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And so if you're like, we're gonna. All right, today, guys, today we're gonna teach the history of India. Why are we teaching the history of America? 911 just happened. No one here's patriotic enough. It's like, God, I think that's. Damn it.
Host 1 (likely male)
I think that's literally what he said on the Larry Elder show. Like, word for word.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. I mean, like. But because again, they're just like, hey, I have a lesson plan. We wrote this a decade ago.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
We're just going.
Host 1 (likely male)
Or Magistra's case. Millennia.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. So two millennia ago, actually.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay. So he's so unliked in school that the school newspaper made fun of him directly in their April Fool's article because they basically put out a fake issue on April Fool's Day.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah, okay. And they pretended to write an article in his voice to lampoon him. And the school parodied his voice, the way he spoke to people. And the article was celebrating a decision to cancel an event where people sold foreign food. Okay. Santa Monica is much better off without that gross display of multiculturalism encroaching on our pure American values. It read, the iron fist of ethnic culinary domination has held this school in its vice like grip for far too long. Yo, the newspaper is coming for you, dude. They put out the April schools article at you also.
Host 2 (likely female)
But again, also, this is. He's in Santa Monica, Right. We're around Los Angeles. All this different stuff. So. Which means, like, he might be going to school with the sons and daughters of Simpsons writers. You know what I mean? Like, there's comedy writers at their. Kids are at that school and they're like, yo, fuck this kid, dude. I asked my dad for advice. He said, just. Just act exactly, like, endlessly right to his fucking.
Host 1 (likely male)
Looks like a scrotum. He probably still had some hair then, but you look like a scrotum now, bitch.
Host 2 (likely female)
I will hit. Okay. Yeah, I just. I love this. Cuz also, they're pointing out.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
What is he scared of? Enchiladas.
Host 1 (likely male)
Enchiladas.
Host 2 (likely female)
He probably. This is a guy who probably Calls lasagna ethnic. Right?
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh, you're an enemy of Garfield.
Host 2 (likely female)
It's so cool.
Host 1 (likely male)
You're an enemy of.
Host 2 (likely female)
Imagine. Imagine being so racist that people are like, you can't handle garlic. You think garlic is spicy, you piece of. They probably. Listen, I know we mentioned that he's Jewish early on. He probably still eats matzah because that is about his spice level. Yeah, he likes it.
Host 1 (likely male)
He likes it on Leaven.
Host 2 (likely female)
He likes it unleavened.
Host 1 (likely male)
I can't put leavening in.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, just like Katie Miller. I did unleavened. All right. I meant because she's flat chested. I didn't say yeasty.
Host 1 (likely male)
Whoa, hey, hey, listen. She's been doing the. The Mar A Lagos. I have before and afters of what her old face looks like.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, really?
Host 1 (likely male)
And her old face is what I'm talking about. What I'm talking about. I'm talking about a gummy smile with no top lip and some fat under eye bags. But she went down there and got that Mar? A Lago treatment. But I remember the north remembers because we got pictures. I got. I'll pop them up. I'll have Mr. Third pop them up. Before and afters. Anyway, okay, okay.
Host 2 (likely female)
In 2002, remind me never to make you mad ever. Okay, okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Ever.
Host 2 (likely female)
I. You did re. You got so mad. You did research.
Host 1 (likely male)
That's the. That is the mission statement of this podcast.
Host 2 (likely female)
I know.
Host 1 (likely male)
I get mad. I do research, and then I yell that research at you for the goofs.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. And the gaffes.
Host 1 (likely male)
And the gaffes. Okay, okay. In 2002, he runs for student announcer. And he gives us runs for student. I mean, I don't know how the high school works.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay, all right.
Host 1 (likely male)
You had to explain field day to me once, and I'm still pissed.
Host 2 (likely female)
I know, I know. Mrs. B went to a Catholic school. And we drove past. We're in New Jersey one time. We drove past a bunch of kids outside playing on stuff and, like, doing games. And she's like, what is that? That doesn't make sense. I said, oh, it must be field day, because it was like May.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And then I proceed to explain that field day was a day where it was a nice day. So they would take all the kids into school and let them go outside, and they would set up, like, special games and let people do events. And I have, like, lemonade. And then she flew into a rage because they used to play wall ball in a cemetery. Yeah, that was all they had.
Host 1 (likely male)
That was in grade school. We play wall ball in the Cemetery. In high school, there were iron bars and barbed wire around my house because I went to inner city high school. So there was no field.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, there was no field. But in the suburbs, a lot of. It's before a lot of spraw. Rarely happen.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
In some of these areas around here, the. The high school typically are on a very large field.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And so they have football and. And baseball.
Host 1 (likely male)
My high school had a small field across the street from it, a very busy street, I might add. And the only thing really marking it from anything else in the area was a mural of a young woman who died of one of the first opiate overdoses in our high school.
Host 2 (likely female)
And you know what's crazy is you had that experience in Northeast Philadelphia at literally the same exact time that Stephen Miller was growing up in Santa Monica.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And you didn't turn out to become a racist shithead who has tried to kill millions of people over the years. Getting closer to Donald Trump.
Host 1 (likely male)
No.
Host 2 (likely female)
No.
Host 1 (likely male)
So he runs for this student announcer.
Host 2 (likely female)
I just want to say that's a nature versus nurture thing. Right.
Host 1 (likely male)
What were his parents.
Host 2 (likely female)
I think. I think his nature is parents push back.
Host 1 (likely male)
And look at him. Be like, you're a little. Yeah, you need to go to therapy. You need to get a real hobby. You suck. And his parents did not do that.
Host 2 (likely female)
No.
Host 1 (likely male)
Because they were paying for the phone plan at January 6th was.
Host 2 (likely female)
Because they did not see it. Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh, right.
Host 2 (likely female)
Right alt.
Host 1 (likely male)
Right. He ran for student announcer. He gave a speech where he questioned. Hold on. I'm actually just gonna play the clip for you.
Host 2 (likely female)
My. The only one who is sick and tired of being told to pick up my trash.
Host 1 (likely male)
And we have plenty of janitors.
Host 2 (likely female)
So is he. He's just a dirt ball. And he hates anyone who doesn't immediately clean up his own dirt. Is that what this is?
Host 1 (likely male)
He's a dirt ball who thinks he's better than everybody.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
And he's. He just likes poking people and starting fights.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. But I'm saying specifically, like, he's screaming about janitors.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
In that clip. Right.
Host 1 (likely male)
And we know that since third grade, he's been messy and dirty. Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
But also. But before that, though, you said his influx. His crux was when they lost their daily maid and had to have a weekly cleaning lady.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Probably mean the only thing the parents ever pushed back on him was the fact that he's probably just throwing trash everywhere.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Because I think he's just a dirt ball.
Host 1 (likely male)
I think he's just a dirt ball.
Host 2 (likely female)
I think he's just like Literally a dirt ball. But he's. He has. He knows it's wrong, but he needs there to be an underclass of people that he can blame for his filth.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yes.
Host 2 (likely female)
That's where. I mean, I'm not a psychologist, but that is what.
Host 1 (likely male)
That's what it's looking like.
Host 2 (likely female)
That's what it reads like.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And I want to put that.
Host 1 (likely male)
So he got on.
Host 2 (likely female)
I was going to read, like. And I would like to burn that book. Does that make sense?
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
He lost that election.
Host 2 (likely female)
Of course he did. You have to be likeable. There was no electoral college for school announcer.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
A job, by the way, at my school, which is, like, no one wanted.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Like, every. Like, I think there was, like, two people who, like, they just traded days.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. He probably wanted it because then people would have to listen to him.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh.
Host 1 (likely male)
Because I think everybody fucking ignores him and they see him coming through Muji.
Host 2 (likely female)
Goji. There's a.
Host 1 (likely male)
Speaking like, shut the fuck up.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, yeah. Know what? You're completely right.
Host 1 (likely male)
And he probably wanted to be the voice of English.
Host 2 (likely female)
He was gonna be Doge.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh.
Host 2 (likely female)
He would have probably not announced things he didn't like.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Or refused it. And then be like, it's an elected position. You can't take away from me. I refuse to announce that it's Taco Tuesday. It should be Hot Dog Tuesday every day a week. Because hot dogs are the American.
Host 1 (likely male)
They're not. They're German. They're German.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, but he likes Germans.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay. Miller was involved in the school's band, tennis, religious studies, and political and youth groups.
Host 2 (likely female)
What do you think he played in band?
Host 1 (likely male)
I don't know. I tried to find out, but nobody could say. And it kept bringing up the Steve Miller Miller Band. So I don't know if maybe it's just like the. The Internet is like the Steve Miller Miller Band.
Host 2 (likely female)
The SEO one. That might be.
Host 1 (likely male)
It's really.
Host 2 (likely female)
I kind of need to know if
Host 1 (likely male)
anybody that went to high school, Steven Miller, knows what he played, if you please.
Host 2 (likely female)
We need to know what instrument is, because I know it's not drums. Honestly. He might have just been marching with them because he likes goose stepping.
Host 1 (likely male)
He loves marching.
Host 2 (likely female)
He just likes marching because I can't picture an instrument that he not only would play well, but that would. Because, like, the instrument also vibes with the person. Right. Like, I was in. When I was in school, I played cello.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
All right. I played cello, and it was good. And the reason why. I just want everyone to know the reason why I picked cello was because they Brought the instruments to. When I was in third grade, they showed a string instruments in third grade. And then in fourth grade, you were allowed to pick band instruments.
Host 1 (likely male)
Got it.
Host 2 (likely female)
They brought in third. And I really wanted to play saxophone.
Host 1 (likely male)
Bill Clinton, baby.
Host 2 (likely female)
I wanted to play actually. Literally. Yes. Because the. The Arsenio hall made it look really cool.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
But I. I really wanted to play saxophone. And I was like, oh, I'll learn how to read the music first.
Host 1 (likely male)
Smart.
Host 2 (likely female)
By doing a string instrument. Yeah. Now I picked cello. And the reason why is because much like marching band in the strings, they had a thing called strolling strings.
Host 1 (likely male)
Got it.
Host 2 (likely female)
And so they would make the violinist walk around while playing. And I was like, I don't want to fucking walk while I play an instrument. And so I picked cello. Because you had to sit in a chair.
Host 1 (likely male)
You just wanted to sit down.
Host 2 (likely female)
I just wanted to sit down.
Host 1 (likely male)
You wanted to do stand up comedy, but sit down music.
Host 2 (likely female)
I want to do stand up comedy, but now I do a podcast where I sit down and I'm literally doing a tour where instead of doing stand up comedy, I am sitting down with a microphone. And my good friend Phil DeFranco. And you can find out more information at crashing out tour.com.
Host 1 (likely male)
nice plug.
Host 2 (likely female)
Thank you. But real fast, I'm gonna go with him. I'm gonna say he probably. I mean, like, honestly, he's a bitch. So it was probably like flute.
Host 1 (likely male)
And that's not to say flute players are bitches.
Host 2 (likely female)
No, it's not.
Host 1 (likely male)
It's just that Stephen Miller's a bitch and Katie Miller has sex with. With him.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
And that's gross.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. She has sex with a flute player. That's what I think it would be, because. No. When I go through all the other different.
Host 1 (likely male)
No. He plays a fife. Is that the one that the little. With the little horns, like.
Host 2 (likely female)
No. No. Because that's just too weird. I don't want to. I don't want to give him that. And also because we have fife and drum corps around here because of Valley Forge and stuff like that. And I don't want to impugn those guys by saying they have anything in common with Stephen Miller. Maybe. Maybe clarinet. He might be a clarinet.
Host 1 (likely male)
No way, dude.
Host 2 (likely female)
You don't think he'd be a clarinet?
Host 1 (likely male)
No way, dude.
Host 2 (likely female)
I don't know. I just. I refuse to let him hear.
Host 1 (likely male)
His favorite musician was Elvis Presley, and his favorite film was Martin Scorsese's Casino. It was often reported that he tried to copy the look of Robert De Niro's character. And Would dress like a mobster to school sometimes. And often he says this. He went to trips to Las Vegas where he reportedly would dress up like Robert De Niro and says he was a skilled craps player.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay, first thing, you are not Robert De Niro from Casino. You are Joe Pesci from Goodfellas. That is how this ends. Okay, just gonna put that out there. I'm watching Trump throw people left and right under the bus. The only thing that might protect you is that you are not a woman. That might be the only reason why you last if you were you.
Host 1 (likely male)
Be an ugly ass woman.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. Like your wife. But the other thing that I want to say here is I'm obsessed with the fact that he's obsessed with Robert De Niro, knowing that Robert De Niro personally hates him.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yes. Robert De Niro, quote, called him. How do you say that guy's name? Not Goebbels.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, Goebbels.
Host 1 (likely male)
He called him Goebbels. That's quote. Yeah, he's Goebbels. And then he said, quote, he's a Nazi. Yes, he is. And he's Jewish. He should be ashamed of himself. Yeah, End quote. From Robert De Niro, who fucking hates you, dude.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yes. Stephen Miller.
Host 1 (likely male)
You dressed up like a man for four years of high school, and he fucking hates you, dude.
Host 2 (likely female)
But also, just. Just real fast. I'm sure Mr. Third may have already thrown it up. Let's throw it up again. An image of Stephen Miller next to Joseph Goebbels. Because many people have pointed out that they both have a lot of the same mannerisms. If you watch Stephen Miller go on Fox News.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And when he's sitting there in front of the White House and saying his weird bombastic shit, the way that some of the language he uses has been. People have pointed out, it feels very cribbed almost directly from Hitler's chief propagandist. That's who Joseph Goebbels was. And all these other different things. Other thing, too. Let's just go back to him loving Elvis. Fuck you.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah, dude, Fuck you.
Host 2 (likely female)
All right. Because Elvis was pro integration. Elvis famously went pushed back against a lot of this stuff. Now, at the end there, did Elvis go and hang out with Richard Nixon and was he anti.
Host 1 (likely male)
Did he marry a child?
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, sure, sure. All those things happen.
Host 1 (likely male)
Did he steal all of his music and ideas from the black community?
Host 2 (likely female)
Yes, yes, yes, yes. But at the same exact time, he also was.
Host 1 (likely male)
Elvis would have told you you were a dork.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yes, he would have. Because he would have been like, hey, man, you're a little too overt, all right? I'm not saying that. We're not saying that Elvis didn't share some ideals with them.
Host 1 (likely male)
Jesus.
Host 2 (likely female)
But I am gonna say that Elvis would have been like, hey, man, chill. Not on main, okay? Katie Miller. We're just saying, like, some people. Jesus.
Host 1 (likely male)
When it's time to scale your business, it's time for Shopify. Get everything you need to grow the way you want, like all the way. Stack more sales with the best converting checkout on the planet. Track your cha chings from every channel right in one spot. And turn real time reporting into big time opportunities. Take your business to a whole new level. Switch to Shopify. Start your free trial today. Instacart makes grocery shopping easier. And just because you're not doing the shopping yourself doesn't mean you don't care how it's done. With Instacart Shopper notes, you can get particular about what you want right in the app. Like rotisserie chicken. That's extra crispy steak with marbling the Romans would have loved, and lettuce you'd actually pick yourself. Just leave a note for your shopper so they can get it right for you without having to ask. That way you can get groceries just how you like. Download the Instacart app and shop today. Conservative writer David Horowitz. Do you know who this guy is?
Host 2 (likely female)
I've heard of this name. I like because there's certain writers like that where they just kind of like, are. They're in the background. And I think they matter to the movement, but they don't matter to me.
Host 1 (likely male)
I didn't. I have no idea who this guy is, but I did look him up.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Conservative writer David Horowitz is listening to the Larry Elder show, as one does just in their car. Listen to the Larry Elder show. The way that people are listening to too many tabs.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. Well, and the thing to remember is a lot of these conservative radio shows like Rush Limbaugh, Larry Elder and others, they're nationally syndicated.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
So even though he's calling into what's more or less a local radio show in California.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
That show is being played nationwide.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yes.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay. And so David Horowitz hears Stephen Miller on the radio show.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
And he feels that Stephen Miller is going to be a great, let's say, disciple of the cause.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay. So he is Stephen Miller's Obi Wan.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yes. He decides he wants to find Miller and take him under his wing.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, no.
Host 1 (likely male)
Now, I did do a little bit of Research on this David Horowitz guy. Because I was like, who is this guy?
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
David Horowitz founded Heterodoxy, a monthly magazine focused on exposing what he described as excessive political correctness on United States university campuses.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
It was meant to have the. This is a quote. It was meant to have the. Have the same feel as the Samas.editor inside the gulag of the PC University.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Can you please.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yes. So the heterodoxy is the idea that there should be multiple ideas.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay. And one of the things that conservatives pushed for a very, very, very long. They still push for a very, very long time is that all higher education centers, especially universities and colleges, push only one form of thought. And they say that's liberalism. And. Or Marxism. Sometimes use the term cultural Marxism, which is a Nazi dog whistle, which really just means Jew stuff.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
But that. That's been a big thing. So that's the Ben Shapiro's of the world. Charlie Kirk.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
All these other guys, the reason why they kept going to colleges is they kept saying that they were fighting back against the communist socialist indoctrination of our kids. And so the idea of heterodoxy is the idea of we need to insert another thought process into these colleges and we need to fight back against them.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And again, it's because. Just so you guys know, it's because reality has a liberal bias. That's a pretty famous thing where it's like, yeah, you can say all these things over here and that's what you believe, but at the end of the day, when we use a scientific method and testing and all these other different things, we find that actually it's over here. Yeah, that's just how that works. And when people go away to college from a small conservative community and they find out things about the scientific method, logic and other things, things. They come back with slightly different ideas than the people who never left that fucking community. And that is literally Plato's allegory of the cave. And this is what these conservatives were trying to fight against. And all those different things. That thing that.
Host 1 (likely male)
That type of magazines, you said it's Psalm is Dot.
Host 2 (likely female)
Sam, is that. That is a Soviet counter revolutionary magazine. What I mean by that is inside of the Soviet Union and the Warsaw Pact countries, which was Eastern Europe during the fall, you know, during the Berlin Wall, and all those different things. All the things that behind the Iron Curtain there were groups of people who were pushing back against the authoritarian communist regimes, and they were doing that by having small local zines. And it was Illegal to have those.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And so even inside of the gulags, which is where they took people who were political prisoners who maybe spoke out against Joseph Stalin or Nikita Khrushchev and Kermit the Frog. And Kermit the Frog famous. They were all sent to gulags in Siberia. And even inside of those gulags, which are prison camps where you're put under hard labor, where many people would die, even inside of those gulags, you then still had people who were still trying to pass around ideas counter to the communist authoritarian government. And I say, I'm just gonna keep saying communist authoritarian government, because people are gonna get in the comments and say a bunch of different shit about communism. At the end of the day, this is about authoritarianism. And the thing is that guys like Stephen Miller and David Horowitz, what they want at the end of the day is they want authoritarianism where they're in charge.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
That's what they're. That's what all of them are fighting over. The. At the end of the day, conservatism is the belief in hierarchies, and that there are, quote, unquote, natural hierarchies throughout not only human civilization, but the natural world. And this is what they teach. As you start looking into things, you're like, that isn't true there. It's not a. It's not a pyramid. They are circles and cycles and all these other different things that you can kind of look at. And some of them we still don't understand. The idea of the alphas.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
This is where, like, all of these manosphere guys, like Alpha wolves. That was from a broken zoological record about wolves. There are no alpha males. They don't exist in any sort of pack anywhere.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
There are no Alphas and Betas and all these.
Host 1 (likely male)
It's a. You just said it. It's a pack. It's a. They're pack animals. Therefore, they. They move in a group.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
And if you are a lone wolf or an alpha wolf who's outside of the pack, you're going to die.
Host 2 (likely female)
You die, you die, you die.
Host 1 (likely male)
That you do not survive if you are a pack animal. And guess what? Humans, pack animals.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, exactly.
Host 1 (likely male)
So going back to David Horowitz appeared in a documentary called Occupy Unmasked, which was a 2012 documentary portraying the Occupy Wall street movement as a sinister organization formed to violently destroy the American government. Okay, so that didn't work, apparently.
Host 2 (likely female)
No, it did not. And number two, it was. What was most sinister about it is that no one knew what the fuck we were doing? No, I was there. I was at Occupy Philly. I knew other people who are. Occupy Wall Street. There's a lot of people inside it. What's crazy, too, is actually a lot of people from Occupy ended up. A bunch of them actually end up eventually going maga. Yeah. Because of. It's part of the great mental break around the Great recession. So in 2008, when the great Recession happened, people started looking at the systems of our government and world, whether that be capitalism, whether that be democracy itself, all these different things. And they started questioning it. And some people were like, it's all a lie. Some people saw the fraud that was inherent in it. And some people were like, we need to reform that. And other people said, well, if there's fraud, then there is no morality. And that's kind of where there's a bunch of different.
Host 1 (likely male)
And then they just decide to elect the biggest fraud in his. Commit the most fraud.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, but they thought that he would commit it on their behalf.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Because they're stupid. There's just. These are dumb people. I just. MAGA people are stupid.
Host 1 (likely male)
No, guess what? They're also evil.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, and. And ugly.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Like Katie Miller and Stephen Miller.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
I'll go, you hideous fucks.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay, so let's see Unmasked, and then.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, real fast. Please support our Patreon, because I'm pretty sure this episod episode will be demonetized on YouTube. I'm relatively sure. Why?
Host 1 (likely male)
What we've said.
Host 2 (likely female)
I've said nothing. No, we've said nothing at all.
Host 1 (likely male)
You can't say that somebody's ugly.
Host 2 (likely female)
No, I'm just saying that both of them should have been swallowed.
Host 1 (likely male)
Well, okay. Oh. Oh. Horowitz is the inventor of the question, do you condemn Hamas?
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, Jesus Christ.
Host 1 (likely male)
Which he directed to a Muslim student at the University of California, San Diego, on May 11, 2010. The student was a member of the Muslim Student association and then holding a. They were holding a Justice in Palestine Week, which Horowitz kept referring to as Hitler Youth Week.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay, so he's a rabid Zionist.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. So Horowitz becomes a very good friend with Stephen Miller. They find each other in the ether and become great friends. Stephen Miller invites Horowitz to come speak at his high school, which he does. Who attended? Comment below if you attended that.
Host 2 (likely female)
God, imagine. Just like. I just, like, think of all of the high school things they made us do.
Host 1 (likely male)
Ours were about, don't do drugs and don't have sex.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
That was about it.
Host 2 (likely female)
Well, that's because you went to a Catholic high school. We had the don't do drugs one. We, we used to get a lot of motivational speakers.
Host 1 (likely male)
No, we didn't get any of that.
Host 2 (likely female)
No, we got like motivational speakers who would come in and be a guy who's like, yeah, I, you know, I had a horrible accident, but I still climbed, like, Mount Kilimanjaro type of stuff. Okay, well, I remember that one. Who was a guy. And then it's stuff like that where they'd be like, you could do anything.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay, well, guess what? Can't do anything because he's dead. Oh, hey, he died of cancer.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
But then I looked into his family, and he does have a son who is currently a tech start angel investor. He invests in tech startups. That's what he does with his time and money, including Twitter. So the cancer is still alive, but David Horowitz is dead.
Host 2 (likely female)
Got it. So David Horowitz son is now one of the owners of Twitter alongside of Elon Musk, who may or may not have power. Face Fox. Katie Miller. Yeah, allegedly. According to people on the Internet.
Host 1 (likely male)
That's just an opinion and a joke.
Host 2 (likely female)
That's just it. Listen, this is a comedy history podcast and we're talking about recent history.
Host 1 (likely male)
Stephen Miller once jumped into a girls track meet to prove that men are athletically superior to women.
Host 2 (likely female)
Say it again.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay. Stephen Miller was playing tennis at school. Right. And he gets done his tennis match and I guess across the fields, the. There's the girls track meet and the ladies are running a 400 meter. He jumps on the track at 50 meters and claims he won the race to prove that men are athletically superior to women.
Host 2 (likely female)
So he jumps into a race after it starts.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Disrupts it because he's not supposed to be on the track.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Then claims he won.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
But this is also the same guy who has been screaming for years about keeping trans women out of women's sports.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah, same guy.
Host 2 (likely female)
Same guy.
Host 1 (likely male)
Same guy.
Host 2 (likely female)
Same guy also entered himself into women's sports to claim and show that he was stronger than women. Okay, just want to.
Host 1 (likely male)
Let me also tell you something that no one from the Athletics Athletics admin could corroborate that this happened. So, like, people went. And after he said that this happened. Yeah, people went, journalists went and tried to find all the coaches and stuff. They're like, we don't remember that happen. We would have remembered if during the
Host 2 (likely female)
races, his third grade teacher remembers.
Host 1 (likely male)
Everybody remembers.
Host 2 (likely female)
Everyone will remember if Stephen Miller ran onto a truck.
Host 1 (likely male)
Here's the Thing. Stephen Miller's the one that said. Said this. He went back to class and he said, I did this and I beat the girls, blah, blah, blah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Because he's a lie.
Host 1 (likely male)
And so he also. He claims he won. And. But none of. There's. There's no women from this track meet coming out to say this happened. But when the one former student was interviewed about this and said, quote, I had no doubts he would do something like that. It was definitely on brand for him. Yeah, because he sucks.
Host 2 (likely female)
No, because also, it sounds like. This is what it sounds like. Can I tell you what it sounds like? It sounds like he was out there playing tennis. Right. At his public school.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And so he's playing tennis and he's. He's leaving and he sees the girls track meet and he pictures it in his mind of him doing it.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And then he went back to class and then started telling the other guys, especially the jocks, because he desperately wants them to like him.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Even though he's a fucking Star Trek dork. That is unlikable in every single way possible, even by the people who run Star Trek.
Host 1 (likely male)
And he doesn't understand Star Trek.
Host 2 (likely female)
No, he doesn't. Which is now owned by the Ellisons, who love Steven. Okay, so he's probably gonna ruin it.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh, God.
Host 2 (likely female)
Stephen Miller actually tweeted at the guy, the guy played Captain Kirk, William Shatner. He tweeted at William Shatner that he should be the one actually running Star Trek. And William Shatner was like, yeah, leave me out of this guy. Yeah, like, thanks, but no thanks.
Host 1 (likely male)
Shatner was on this space mission with Elon. Like, hey, just leave me out of this.
Host 2 (likely female)
No, that was. That wasn't Elon.
Host 1 (likely male)
It wasn't Elon.
Host 2 (likely female)
He went up with Jeff.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh, he went up with Basis.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, he went up with Bezos. And when he landed, Jeff Bezos was so off putting because. Because literally William Shatner's like, crying, I finally went to space and, like, trying to read this poem. And the whole time, Jeff Bezos, like, let's get drunk. You know what, Mr. Third, insert clip. The impression I had that I never
Host 1 (likely male)
expected to have
Host 2 (likely female)
is, you're shooting up.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh, my God.
Host 2 (likely female)
Come here. I want one. I want to hear this. Here. You want a little of this?
Host 1 (likely male)
Yuck.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yep.
Host 1 (likely male)
So Stephen Miller starts writing, like, say, blogs. He starts writing blog articles on Horowitz's website, which was called Front Page Magazine. And on this blog. He wanted his school's culture to embrace, quote, inclusive patriotism in contrast to multiculturalism. And one of his demands on his blog was that they would institute the pledge of Allegiance five days a week. And he pushed this issue so hard that I guess the. The school did institute the pledge and Miller reported it as a huge victory.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay, sure.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. Okay.
Host 2 (likely female)
I mean, I guess that's just like the. Again, I think the announcer reads. Yeah, because like, we had pledge allegiance at all my schools and all those different things, and it turned into one of those things where it's like, some kids would be like, I'm not doing it. And the teacher's like, okay, yeah, who cares? Yeah, it was just one of the things like, all right, you're in your rebellion phase.
Host 1 (likely male)
Like, that was kind of welcome to high school students.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, it's just high school. Oh, you told. Oh, wait, you told a 15 year old what to do.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh, oh, great.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
I'm sure they're gonna listen.
Host 2 (likely female)
That works out well.
Host 1 (likely male)
So high school, this high school, Santa Monica High School is going to finally be free of him.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
He is going to go forth and ruin the days of college students at Duke.
Host 2 (likely female)
What? He went to Duke?
Host 1 (likely male)
Miller started duke University in 2003.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, my God. That makes sense. Makes so much sense, honestly. Can I say something real fast? I just want to say something. This is the. The perfect match made in Hell yeah, Duke. Yeah. You guys don't know Magistra. My mom went to University of North Carolina. That's where she met my dad. Tar Heel family over here. I'm a Tar Heel born, I'm a Tar Heel bred, and when I die, I'm a Tar Heel dead. Because it's rah rah Carolina liner. Rah, rah, Carolina liner. But I just want to just, just, just sit in this for a minute because they are. I don't know if you know this. It's the Duke is the Blue Duck Devils.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay.
Host 2 (likely female)
They're. They're, they are. They're literally devils.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
It's a private school. Yeah. And they're all scum.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And yeah. I mean, yeah, they do some good doctors. Like, their medical stuff's fine.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh, the one doctor from community, Ken Jeong, he went to both.
Host 2 (likely female)
He went to Duke and unc.
Host 1 (likely male)
So.
Host 2 (likely female)
Heated rivalry. My entire life. I was raised to the point where someone actually asked my mom what would happen because I applied to University of North Carolina. I didn't get in.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And someone asked, well, what if you applied to Duke? And he got in and my mom looked at him dead in the face and she would say, well, if he accepted it, I don't have a son.
Host 1 (likely male)
Wow.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, that's just like, one of those things there. But the fact that he went to Duke is so goddamn evil. Yeah, it's so fucking evil.
Host 1 (likely male)
I heard that everybody went, the Duke is ugly.
Host 2 (likely female)
Wow. Wow. But enough about Katie Miller.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh, I don't think she went there. She went to, like, Florida.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, it doesn't matter. I don't care. She's got Duke face.
Host 1 (likely male)
Whoa. Oh, God. Okay, so as a freshman at Duke,
Host 2 (likely female)
real fast, if you are a member of our Patreon and you.
Host 1 (likely male)
We're just kidding. This isn't about you.
Host 2 (likely female)
I'm not kidding. I want you to unsubscribe. No, I want you to unsubscribe from the podcast.
Host 1 (likely male)
Stop it right now.
Host 2 (likely female)
And then someone else who is a good person who went to University of North Carolina or one of the other many great schools out there, please join us at Pearlmania500.net Become a team lead today and get ad free access to our show. All right, keep going.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay. As a freshman at Duke, according to a biographer who wrote a book about him, Miller left garbage strewn across the floor of his dorm after he missed the trash can all the time. And when other students asked him if he was gonna pick it up, Miller said, what hellhole are you from? We have people here for that. The common room got so messy that students were temporarily banned from it. And when they received notice from the school about cleaning up the room, Miller wrote a two page response blaming the janitors.
Host 2 (likely female)
That's so fucking. So he's literally over here going, kobe. And it's just missing. Yeah, he's just. Katie Miller, you have had sex with a man who cannot even get it into a trash can.
Host 1 (likely male)
I bet there's. Wait, that makes everywhere.
Host 2 (likely female)
That makes you the trash can.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh, Katie, Jesus. Wow.
Host 2 (likely female)
Also, I checked out your view count on your pod. It's not doing well. We regularly do better than your pot all the time, Katie. Regularly. We don't have to bring Elon Musk on to Papa Rating. We just stay consistent with both our MA Morals and our view count.
Host 1 (likely male)
Nice. Okay, so you blame the janitors. In 2004, outraged at Duke's decision to schedule a Palestine Solidarity Movement Conference, Miller founded the university's chapter of of Horowitz's Students for Academic Freedom and rallied students to oppose the conference. The following year, he was the author of a column in the Duke Chronicle, the newspaper, and he titled his column Miller Time.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay, there's a lot to unpack there. So he's a rabid Zionist who wants to silence people from their Free speech.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
For speaking out against the suppression of Palestinians through the American. American foreign policy.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
He hates his fellow students.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And then on top of all of that, he did copyright infringement for a beer brand for his stupid fucking column. And then he called it Miller Time.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
I just want to let you know, Steve Miller Time has given me diarrhea many times.
Host 1 (likely male)
Miller time ruined 2003 for me. This is like 2004, so.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Same.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. Yeah. You're a piece of shit.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, that's. We've.
Host 2 (likely female)
No, it's been established the entire time.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. His combative debate strategy in the column earned Miller a reputation at the school as being the fucking worst.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. 100%.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. The being fucking worse.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
They use different language, but that's what it is.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, yeah. Got it.
Host 1 (likely male)
People read this and were like, that guy sucks.
Host 2 (likely female)
That guy sucks.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
I bet he's wearing a bow tie at that. That point he feels like a bow tie kid.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh, God.
Host 2 (likely female)
No, but he probably. He's just emotionally.
Host 1 (likely male)
No, he was dressed differently. I'll get into it later.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Miller invites Horowitz to come speak at Duke, who in turn named Stephen Miller to lead the Terrorism Awareness Project, an initiative that conflated Muslims and Arabs with terrorists.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. Of course.
Host 1 (likely male)
And Stephen Miller was then. Then appeared on Fox and Friends to promote that effort.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yes. 100%. I think people. A lot of people forget exactly how Islamophobic, especially the conservative movement was.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
During this time. I'm not saying that the libs were any better, but there was a wild difference in it. Guys like Stephen Miller, specifically, in the same way he's been doing with ICE now.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Are heavily pushing racial profiling.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yes.
Host 2 (likely female)
And, like, listen to, like, if you're brown, if you have a beard, if we think that you might be Muslim any sort of way, then they should be targeted. It's the same thing he's been pushing with ICE and they. Now. It's called Kavanaugh Stops.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Where if you're speaking a foreign language, if you look like you might be here with questionable documentation, is the language I'll use for it.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
That ICE or other federal agents can be allowed to stop you. They can say literally, the person you are is specifically enough to warrant search.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
To warrant questioning. When before. We've always been a nation of. No, the cops have to have a reason. Oh, I think that man over there committed a crime. Well, what do you. What proof do you have that you think he committed a crime? Well, he's standing in the street holding a gun and wearing a mask. Well, sorry, buddy. That means he's an ice agent now.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Like, that's where we are with it. Yeah. And that's because of fuckheads like Stephen Miller.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yes.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay, now this next sentence I'm gonna read is directly from Wikipedia. This is not how I described it.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
In the aftermath of the Duke lacrosse rape hoax. That's what they're calling it. Okay. Miller defended the three members of the Duke's men lacrosse team who were accused of rape, arguing that they had been presumed guilty for being white male. He went and appeared on Nancy Grace and also went on the O'Reilly Factor to discuss the case. Stephen Miller later told the Atlantic that his support of the players was his greatest college achievement.
Host 2 (likely female)
Jesus. All right, I.
Host 1 (likely male)
You have sex with that guy, Katie Miller. You birthed his kids.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. So the thing is, with this entire thing with the Duke lacrosse team. Yeah, it was. There was a Rolling Stone article, I believe There was a bunch of other different stuff in there. There was a lot with the reporting.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
It wasn't because they were white that everyone went after them. It was because of, like, There was so many other factors around it that are very muddled and confused. But again, this was one of those ones where Stephen Miller grabbed it. There was. There's other incidents throughout the last 10 years where Steve has grabbed these moments where it's like, oh, some things have, like, didn't work out quite the right way. And he's like, this is proof. This is proof of reverse racism.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And this is exactly. Use that as a springboard.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
To get on the Fox, to get into these different places. And so that way he could show people, look at me. I can have a TV presence while I'm still in college.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. Okay. Now, speaking of how he's dressing, because, like we said, he's not wearing a suit anymore.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Or he is, but he was really trying to fashion himself as a gentleman. In the college paper. He often lamented at the lack of mahogany and leather or even a smoking room that he could relax in on campus. He was often seen walking around campus in a terry cloth robe, drinking scotch.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay, so he is. So. So he's like, mainlining movies about college.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Because he's. That's Van Wilder. That is Animal House. There's a little bit of, I think, old school mixed in there as well. The Will Ferrell movie.
Host 1 (likely male)
Not experiencing college. He's watching media about college and trying to match the media.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yes. 100%. 100%. Because he's an unfuckable loser. For the exception of Katie Miller. Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Katie Miller would do it.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Multiple times, apparently.
Host 2 (likely female)
Because emotionally they're equal.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Physically too.
Host 1 (likely male)
Stephen Miller joined the Duke.
Host 2 (likely female)
There's not enough mahogany around here. You're at Duke University.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
You're surrounded by some of the richest people. You're there to network. Yeah. And you're complaining about the. The wood.
Host 1 (likely male)
Put the picture of the white lotus dad in the Duke sweater right here.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, yeah. Let me tell you, every time that he put that thing up to his head, I was like, do it.
Host 1 (likely male)
All right. Okay. So Stephen Miller joins the Duke Conservative Union.
Host 2 (likely female)
Of course he did. Of course. I think that's just called going to Duke.
Host 1 (likely male)
I think it's just called.
Host 2 (likely female)
I think that's just being at Duke.
Host 1 (likely male)
He eventually becomes the organization's executive director in his senior year.
Host 2 (likely female)
Of course he did.
Host 1 (likely male)
Now, through the union, you know who he met in the union, who did he meet? Richard B. Spencer, known white supremacist.
Host 2 (likely female)
The Nazi.
Host 1 (likely male)
The Nazi.
Host 2 (likely female)
The Nazi.
Host 1 (likely male)
The actual self proclaimed one.
Host 2 (likely female)
He was free. Became friends with Richard Spencer, the Nazi,
Host 1 (likely male)
through the Duke Conservative Union.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay, real fast, we're just gonna put up an image of Richard Spencer being punched in the head and having sonic rings fly out.
Host 1 (likely male)
Nice.
Host 2 (likely female)
All right. There we go. Yeah. You know what's so crazy now is actually, Stephen Miller has made the world so bad that Richard Spencer is now regularly speaking out against Donald Trump. Yeah, that's how. That's how. Through the Looking Glass. But just like Tucker Carlson. Fuck that guy. Not allowed in the tent.
Host 1 (likely male)
No.
Host 2 (likely female)
Hey. Not allowed the tent. Not allowed to be a leader. Not allowed to be a fucking leader. All right.
Host 1 (likely male)
Go rot.
Host 2 (likely female)
Fuck off.
Host 1 (likely male)
Although Stephen Miller told Nancy Grace when he was on her show that he wanted to be a prosecutor, he skipped his scheduled LSAT test. That which is required to get in the law school. He didn't go to it. And when asked about it later in life, he said that he was really focused on establishing a memorial for the September 11 attacks, and that's why he missed it.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay. Oh, I didn't take the LSATs because I was thinking about statues.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. Off forever. You liar. You just knew you're gonna fail because you spent all things. He spent his entire college running around screaming at people for being brown, demanding that they look at him while he was wearing a bathrobe and smoking and then just like setting up his weird little conservative groups. Yeah, he was there. He did college the way that he did college to network. He didn't go there to learn anything.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Because if he had learned anything, he would learn that 90% of what he believes is wrong and gross.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Just like his face.
Host 2 (likely female)
Just like his face. And you know what? We'll be right back after this.
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Host 2 (likely female)
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Host 1 (likely male)
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Host 2 (likely female)
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Host 1 (likely male)
He's gonna graduate from Duke University.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay.
Host 1 (likely male)
Polyci mage.
Host 2 (likely female)
Of course he is. Cause he's a piece of shit. Listen, as somebody who Was like, nearly a poly sci mage. And know a lot of people who are poly sci mages. It's like, it's fine. But it is also one of those ones where it's like, what do you do with that?
Host 1 (likely male)
There's.
Host 2 (likely female)
There's a. Weirdly, a lot of parents. There's like. I feel like he is like the reverse mate. That's how this is. Felt the entire episode.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh, no.
Host 2 (likely female)
Like, he's like, I have long hair. He has none.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
I have a beautiful wife who has a successful podcast. He doesn't.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
He went to Duke University. I didn't get into unc. You know what I mean? Like, there's a lot of different things like that.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Where I'm like, sitting through here like I was going to be. I was like, the poli sci history and philosophy.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And like, in all of those, when I was looking at it, I said, what do you do with those? And I couldn't figure out, you know,
Host 1 (likely male)
what he did with his. He graduated from college and then embarked on a birthright Israel trip.
Host 2 (likely female)
Of course he did. Yeah, of course he did. It's my birthright. Your land. Okay, that's great.
Host 1 (likely male)
Through David Horowitz, again, most people I
Host 2 (likely female)
know who went on birthright trips came back and it's like, oh, that's fine.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Most people I know who did that come back and go, oh, that's fucking crazy.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah. Not doing that.
Host 2 (likely female)
That's what we.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay. So through David Horowitz, Miller began working for Minnesota representative. I nailed it. Minnesota.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Representative Michele Bachmann.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, no. Michelle Bachmann. Jesus. She was. She was proto Marjorie Taylor Greene.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Michelle Bachman was her own type of looney and a big part of her district. The reason why she was able to get into office is because they gerrymandered her district and they counted the prisoners.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh.
Host 2 (likely female)
There was a prison in her district, so it raised the amount of people, but the prisoners couldn't vote because they're felons.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
So it was like a whole thing in there. Eventually she got, like, districted out and all this different stuff. But, yeah, she was a real piece of shit.
Host 1 (likely male)
He's working as her press secretary, and he moves to D.C. where his family, his mom and dad and his family assisted him in purchasing a condo for $450,000.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, okay. So they do. They. They are still.
Host 1 (likely male)
They're still supporting. Still supporting all of this.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Never being like, hey, you suck.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. And this is in 2000. What, like 2009?
Host 1 (likely male)
Ish.
Host 2 (likely female)
9. So 2009, he spends $450,000 on a condo which is as home prices crashed.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
So they have a lot of money. Yeah, they have a lot, A lot of money to be able to buy a $450,000 condo in D.C. in 2009.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
That is probably a million dollar condo today.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Just from thinking about prices. Because if you watch and look at like, if you go to Zillow and look at the chart, it goes like big dip there and then it like kind of flatlines for a bit, starts slowly going up and then it spikes in 2020.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay, so Miller stops working for Bachmann and goes and gets a job with Arizona Representative John Shadag. And with John Shadag, he participated in the Tea Party protests against Barack Obama.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. Okay, so he's in the early Tea Party, which was a. Basically a sock puppet that was put together of. This is where you get the people. People holding up signs be like, keep your government hands off my Medicare.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
That level of stuff.
Host 1 (likely male)
But yeah, the government distributes Medicare care.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. They don't know that they're government.
Host 1 (likely male)
Who do you think gives? Who does the Medicare?
Host 2 (likely female)
I want you to know, MAGA people are stupid.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah, I know. And also evil. We can't just let them go off with just being dumb.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Because I had a conversation with a guy at the hotel the other day.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Because we were talking about something and we shouldn't have been talking about while he was on the clock because we're just yelling about politics loudly.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
And I was like, I love this for us. But I was like, I'm tired of hearing that. Oh, they're just dumb. And they didn't know. And now they're coming around. They voted for a bomb. They voted to explode the country, to hurt everyone. They said, we fucking hate all of you. We're going to blow you up. We hate you. That's what they voted for. They knowingly voted for a bomb. And now they're mad that they're getting hit with shrapnel. Yeah, fuck you. Bleed out.
Host 2 (likely female)
All right.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay. So then he leaves that job in Arizona.
Host 2 (likely female)
You are really sexy. I just want you to know. All right.
Host 1 (likely male)
He leaves that job in Arizona for the Arizona guy because he's still in D.C. and he begins working for Alabama Senator Jeff Sessions.
Host 2 (likely female)
Jeff Beauregard Sessions.
Host 1 (likely male)
Jeff Sessions.
Host 2 (likely female)
Jeff Beauregard Sessions. Little guy. Little racist guy. Yeah, that's. So he is. He is. That's a who's who. So he went to. He went to Michelle Bachman. David Horace Concern with Michelle Bachman. Minnesota. Right. Which also. And then you can see some of the targeting he's done at Minnesota over the years. So he goes to Minnesota, then he's down to Arizona, because. Border stuff. Yeah, that's what. That part. And then going to Alabama to Jeff Beauregard Sessions. Yeah, that's just because he wants a taste of that. That classic racism.
Host 1 (likely male)
One of his things is he sought out to legitimize his criticisms of immigration and he wanted to get a larger audience. So he formed a lot of relationships while he was working for sessions with anti immigration organizations including the center for Immigration Studies, the Federation for American Immigration Reform, and what's something called Numbers usa.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, I don't like that name of that last one. That's terrible.
Host 1 (likely male)
No, that sounds bad.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
While working for Sessions, he also met Steve Bannon and Andrew Breitbart. Both men recognized Miller from his time on the Larry Elder Show. They were like, oh, we remember you. We heard you when you were in high school talking on Larry Elder. Can you fucking imagine the dork level of being Andrew Breitbart and Steve Vaddin and be like, oh, yeah, I remember listening to this high school dork talk on a news radio show and being like, I'll remember that name. Losers.
Host 2 (likely female)
I can't get over this. Also throw up the image of Steve Bannon, one of the ugliest people on fucking earth. I bet Katie Miller thinks he's hot. Yeah, because she's blind, apparently. And Andrew Breitbart dead.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yay.
Host 2 (likely female)
High five. Yeah, yeah, stay dead, you fucking loser.
Host 1 (likely male)
Rocks.
Host 2 (likely female)
And yeah, Andrew Bepart. A few people point out that Andrew Bee part would not like what Steve Bannon did with his name through brief art, which is a massive disinformation and misinformation operation that Steve Bannon used alongside people like Milo Yiannopoulos and Stephen Miller to. After they learned all these different tricks from Gamergate on how to play with people's brains.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah, he actually, Steve Miller worked to influence the editorial coverage of Breitbart News. He would send editors links to white supremacist online only magazine American Renaissance. And he often. It was often said that he helped legitimize Breitbart's language through his influence.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. So what he did was he's like, hey, guys, there's a market for being a Nazi. Yeah, that's what he's doing. Yeah, He, Stephen Miller is subscribing to Nazi websites and white supremacist websites. And then he's going, hey, you can go harder. Yeah, because you Guys are sound a lot like Mitt Romney.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
You guys are sounding a lot like John McCain. We don't want that. I want you to sound like Adolf Hitler. Yeah, that's what he's doing. And that's. And because he's. Again, part of it too is with all these different things is you can convince a company when all they care about is bottom lines and numbers, when they're looking at analytics, you can convince them for a bit to care about gay rights because you say, hey, there's some gay people have a market and they have money. You convince them to care about Black History Month. Hey, black people have money and there's a market. Yeah. All these different things. But you can also, using that same logic, convince them that Nazis have a market. And if you're willing to throw out gay people, black people, immigrants, all these other different groups and say we're just going to work on the Nazi market, you can, you can argue, which is what Stephen Miller did, that you don't need to. Cuz there was a movement after 2012, specifically after Mitt Romney lost to Barack Obama, where they said, we need a kinder, gentler Republican Party.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
We need to lean away from our white supremacist dog whistles.
Host 1 (likely male)
Okay.
Host 2 (likely female)
We need to bring in Latinos. Specifically, we need to bring in black people. And that was what the autopsy report was. Post after post. The 2012.
Host 1 (likely male)
Let me just read this real quick.
Host 2 (likely female)
Sure, go ahead.
Host 1 (likely male)
As a communications aide for Jeff Sessions of Alabama Republican, he was working with Republican leaders. And Republican leaders had concluded from Mitt Romney's loss in 2012 that the party needed to court Latino voters. Miller took the opposite view, deciding that the path to victory lay in further demonizing immigrants to win over white working class voters. Miller devoted himself to studying the intricacies of immigration law to find ways to help sink all bipartisan efforts on immigration. So he, he decided again, he did not go to law school.
Host 2 (likely female)
No.
Host 1 (likely male)
He just was like, I'm gonna learn everything I can while working with Jeff fucking Sessions.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
And go against what the Republican, the RNC was saying at the time, like you were just saying.
Host 2 (likely female)
Well, and what he learned was he could go and read into the bills and, and say things like, they're giving, they're going to give them free money and they're not going to give you free money. Yeah, they're going to give them help over these things. Oh, wait, no, no. And he'll use language. He does it all the time. And he, until Trump came to power the second time. Oh, no, it's not that we hate all immigrants. We just hate illegal immigrants. Yeah. They're cutting the line. If we were to go do. Even though this is exactly what actually Ronald Reagan did, we're giving amnesty to a bunch of different people because the system got so backlogged. We had. There was a bill for Biden, a bipartisan bill that got sunk by Steve Miller and Donald Trump because they actually had a work to that they figured out bipartisanly how to handle the immigration issues that were happening in the 2000s post Covid and back in 2020 through 24. There were deaths in 2013. Obama pushed on that really, really hard. There were also times when George W. Bush said that we were needed to fix our broken immigration system because our immigration system is broken.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
But now with Stephen Miller in the White House, the only immigrants that we're letting come in as refugees are white South Africans like Elon Musk, because Katie Miller needs to have sex with someone while Steve Miller allegedly sits in a chair in the corner.
Host 1 (likely male)
Allegedly.
Host 2 (likely female)
So I've heard.
Host 1 (likely male)
It's a joke. It's a Comedy Podcast. In June 2015, businessman. Failed businessman, I might add. Donald Trump declares his candidacy for the 2016 presidential election. Trump's views on race interested Miller.
Host 2 (likely female)
I wonder why. Yeah, yeah, that's because his opening sentence. Trump opened his campaign by calling by saying that Mexicans, specifically.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Were criminals and rapists.
Host 1 (likely male)
And Steve Miller's giant, outsized, ugly ears perked up.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yep.
Host 1 (likely male)
And the wrinkles in his forehead went down just like Randall from the show Recess.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yep.
Host 1 (likely male)
Miller was particularly invested in defeating Rubio, son of Cuban immigrants and a member of the Gang of Eight who was running for president. The Gang of Eight was four Democratic people and four Republicans that were working together to fix immigration.
Host 2 (likely female)
Rubio is Marco Rubio. He was the senator from Florida. He is currently the Secretary of State of the United States, who is in. Stuck in basically a fight between him and Vice President J.D. vance on who will succeed Donald Trump. Which is insane, because Donald Trump sits upon a golden throne, and we must feed psychics to him every single day to make sure the webway stays open. That's a 40k joke for some of you. But the. The. The thing that's so funny about this is finding out that Steve Miller personally wanted to destroy Marco Rubio because Marco Rubio, again, the Gang of. They were like. I'm saying, they were working on.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
They were trying to figure out how to fix immigration.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And Marco Rubio, Steve Miller hates you because your last name Ends in a vowel. You Catholic?
Host 1 (likely male)
Well, no. No quarter for Rubio either. He's currently strangling Cuba, and people are going to suffer and die because of the actions he's taking.
Host 2 (likely female)
And also, he's been currently bombing Venezuela. He also attacked Iran. Marco Rubio is more complicit than anyone else in human history. And, Marco, it's because of that foam party, isn't it?
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Huh. Huh. We'll just leave it there. Marco, the rumors about you at the foam party in Miami.
Host 1 (likely male)
Don't Google it. In January 2016, Miller joined Trump's presidential campaign as senior policy advisor. He began writing speeches for Trump. Trump, at Steve Bannon's request and a lot of encouragement from Jared Kushner, Trump's son in law. Miller intensified Trump's language, often embedding the term radical Islam. That. That literally. We can thank Stephen Miller for radical Islam.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah, that was a term he really pushed.
Host 1 (likely male)
Stephen Miller wrote what is called the American carnage speech.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Which was when Trump's first inauguration. He said, quote, I will fight for you with every breath of my body. I will never, ever let you down. America will start winning again. Winning like never before. No. Okay. We will no longer accept politicians who are all talk and no action. Constantly complaining, but never doing anything about it. The time for empty talk is over. Now arrives the hour of action. Uh, Trump also went on to say that the elites in Washington are prospering. And their victories have not been celebrated as your victories. Their triumphs have not been your triumphs. And while they celebrated in our nation's capital, there was little to celebrate for struggling families across our land. That all changes started here and now, because this moment is your moment. It belongs to you. These. This American carnage stops right here and stops right now.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That was a. That was a speech that was so bizarre that George W. Bush himself turned to Hillary Clinton and said, and I quote, well, that was some weird. Huh?
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Like, that's. Yeah. The American Carnage speech. That was. It was that speech. Because I was at work when he was inaugurated. I had a little radio on my desk, and I listen to NPR because I don't like the Larry Elder Show. And I was listening, I heard that speech, and I was like, that was weird. And then a couple days later, he gave his first press conference. And then I put in my two weeks notice at my job.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Because I was sitting there and I had a picture on my desk of Mrs. P. And our dog, our old dog at the time. And I looked at that and I was like, we could die at any moment.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
You could just fire off a nuke. And I hate this job. I hate my boss. I hate all of this. This shit sucks. And I just, I called you and I'm like, I think, think. I think I'm gonna try something else.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And I did. And it was, it was a big moment for me.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
Because I think I still would have been at that job today. Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
So I guess I have it all. Stephen Miller to thank.
Host 1 (likely male)
No, no, no. Also I looked it up and in his original inauguration. Inauguration speech, he said I 3 times my 1 time and me 0 times. In his. His second inauguration speech, he said I 33 times my 15 times and me two times.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
So in the first one he's like, we are gonna do it. It's for America.
Host 2 (likely female)
This is all for you. I'm doing it for you people.
Host 1 (likely male)
And then in the. The most recent one, he's like, this is for me, buddy. I'm not going to prison.
Host 2 (likely female)
I'm back.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh, no. Okay. So after President Trump is elected, Stephen Miller meets the ugliest woman around. Katie Miller, I don't know what her maiden name is. Didn't care to look it up.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
She was a former DOGE staff member and he met her. They were introduced by friends that also worked in the White House.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yep.
Host 1 (likely male)
White House is a big place.
Host 2 (likely female)
Well, can I tell you how that what she was doing at the White House. But she was actually working for the Vice President.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh, okay.
Host 2 (likely female)
She was the Vice President's communication director.
Host 1 (likely male)
Got it.
Host 2 (likely female)
When Stephen Miller sent all those people to go attack the vice president on January 6th.
Host 1 (likely male)
Right.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
Right.
Host 2 (likely female)
But they got married before that.
Host 1 (likely male)
Right. So she didn't know that was gonna happen.
Host 2 (likely female)
She probably did.
Host 1 (likely male)
She just don't check the phone record. She's on his parents plan.
Host 2 (likely female)
Exactly.
Host 1 (likely male)
Great.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah.
Host 1 (likely male)
They had three kids. Because she had sex with the ugliest guy in America.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yep.
Host 1 (likely male)
At least three times.
Host 2 (likely female)
And we don't know that.
Host 1 (likely male)
Well, what's her at her podcast have on Apple?
Host 2 (likely female)
I looked it up. It had 2.6 stars. We're at 4.9. Because one guy, one guy got real mad at me for talking shit on Gamergate and he came in and review bombed us.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
But we actually have for she's.
Host 1 (likely male)
Which is literally just proves the point of everything you said about Gamergate.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. Yes.
Host 1 (likely male)
Revu Review bombing our podcast. How many years later about your opinions on Gamergate and then writing all of that in the comments proves that you were right about the people of Gamergate.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yes. I know. But anyway, Katie Miller sucks. I've looked in. Because what she does, she has the interview podcast.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
And so the ones that she's had that have done Well, I got 250,000 plus in those things are when she, like, interviews, like J.D. vance or the Elon Musk one that she did in four months. Months ago. That got a lot of. Got a lot of views. Because, again, Elon Musk's name is an SEO driver.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
So, like, with the title of this one, like, we could call it Elon Musk's Cuck.
Host 1 (likely male)
Yeah.
Host 2 (likely female)
You know, like, that's what we could call it.
Host 1 (likely male)
Probably the Ugliest man in America.
Host 2 (likely female)
No, I think I was gonna go with Birth of a Monster.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh, that's a good.
Host 2 (likely female)
Yeah. Birth of a Monster. The Stephen Miller.
Host 1 (likely male)
Do you know who Dan Burrows is?
Sponsor/Ad Voice
Dan.
Host 2 (likely female)
But the name sounds familiar.
Host 1 (likely male)
You should look it up.
Host 2 (likely female)
Okay, I'll look up Dan Burroughs. That's in relation to Stephen Miller.
Host 1 (likely male)
No, I would never say that.
Host 2 (likely female)
Oh, okay. Got it. Well, this has been a fun episode of Too Many Tabs. Thank you guys so much for joining us. Make sure you, like, subscribe, comment, follow us everywhere, and always join us on patreon@pearlmania500.net Bye, everybody. Too many frauds and too many scammers that we wish weren't real. Too many cons and too many spammers and we're starting to feel like we've got too many tabs open. Too many tabs. Remember to smile. You know, I'm really glad we're not Katie Miller.
Host 1 (likely male)
Oh, every day I wake up grateful I'm not Katie Miller.
Host 2 (likely female)
So much prettier.
Host 1 (likely male)
Thank you. Inside and out.
Release Date: April 26, 2026
In this raucous and sardonic episode, the husband and wife duo behind the Pearlmania500 podcast dive deep into the origins, formative experiences, and career of Stephen Miller—Trump White House advisor and architect of some of America’s harshest anti-immigration policies—as well as the online and personal drama involving his wife, Katie Miller. Prompted by Katie’s recent criticism of "liberal men’s" attractiveness, the hosts take listeners on a comedic, research-packed journey through Miller’s childhood, high school years, ideological development, rise in conservative politics, and marriage, all seasoned with biting humor, pointed anecdotes, and personal reflections.
“He was deep into border control at 8 years old.” —Host 1 (17:35)
“Sometimes you just got to get punched in high school… maybe that was a problem.” —Host 1 (32:06)
“His favorite hobby in high school is bullying.” —Host 1 (30:40)
“He was a nerd, he was a dork, he was a Dweeb. But he was a bully.” —Host 1 (34:18)
“We can thank Stephen Miller for radical Islam.” —Host 1 (101:59)
This episode of "Too Many Tabs" serves as both a comedic roast and an incisive, tab-heavy exposé on Stephen Miller’s evolution from privileged, contrarian child to influential architect of reactionary politics. Through layered research and relentless ridicule, the hosts draw connections between personality, privilege, ideology, and real-world impact—always mindful to distinguish their targeted roasting from attacks on anyone but the Millers themselves.
If you like your history with an edge (and a lot of tabs open), this episode delivers: sharp takedowns, substantial backstory, and plenty of pointed laughs at the expense of America’s "greatest monsters." And yes, remember to smile—at least you’re not Katie Miller.