We Talk Back – "Big Homie" (Nov 27, 2025)
Hosts: TamBam & AJ Holiday
Theme: Can relationships survive when women out-earn their partners? Side chicks, success, ego, and the real currency in love.
Episode Overview
In this Thanksgiving-themed episode, TamBam and AJ Holiday balance relatable holiday banter with unflinching analysis of relationships, gender roles, and money. Using recent celebrity drama (notably Summer Walker’s “side chick” controversy and Kandi Burruss’s divorce news), they dive deep into why successful women often find relationship balance challenging, what “being a Big Homie” in love really requires, and why ego—not money—is usually the relationship killer.
Highlights & Key Segments
1. Thanksgiving Vibes & Gratitude Check-In
- [03:36] – Hosts exchange holiday greetings and share what they're grateful for, with plenty of humor about family, health, and “side teeth.”
- AJ: "I'm grateful for good health. I'm grateful for healthy relationships. I'm grateful for bundle deals tomorrow. I'm grateful for my side teeth." [03:52]
- Culinary confessions: Mac ‘n cheese, seafood salad, crab rice, and the reality of taking laxatives post-holiday meal.
- [05:38] – AJ jokes about cooking for "five different families" and getting paid for it.
2. Holiday Shopping Scams & Black Friday Realness
- [08:26] – Venting about lackluster Black Friday deals.
- TamBam: "The Black Friday sale is not black enough for me." [08:30]
- Zara coming to Charlotte: excitement over shopping locally versus fighting crowds [09:11].
3. Personal Life Updates & Work Hustle
- [10:07] – AJ recounts the physical grind of working extra hours at the salon: "I worked like a Hebrew slave this weekend."
- Shoes and survival: Hoka vs. Asics for hair stylists [11:04].
4. Hot Topics: Summer Walker & Side Chick Culture
The "Pizza Hut" Scandal
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[12:24] – The hosts break down the viral audio of Summer Walker coaching Rich the Kid on “side chick” tactics.
- “Just get a second cell phone and save her number as Pizza Hut. She don’t give a fuck.” [12:55]
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Dissection of side-chick normalization, hypocrisy, and effects on women’s self-worth.
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AJ: "You don’t think you deserve better than that? Baby girl, you are not a pizza place. You are a whole mother..." [13:06–13:17]
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TamBam tallies up Summer Walker’s dating history, questioning public personas versus private behavior.
- "Y'all bitches ain’t who y’all think y’all are." [14:43]
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Accountability for “side” behavior and the cyclical nature of romantic drama in public and private.
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Quote — TamBam on Summer Walker:
- "Now, at this point, I don’t know … she’s a fucking dweeb at this point. That's why I'm looking at her like, girl, what? And I love Summer Walker, man." [18:28]
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Reflection on how heartbreak cycles affect a woman’s self-esteem and public perception.
- "You're not looking at a confident woman. No, that's not what I'm seeing. Because you wouldn't be … you wouldn’t be second best to any bitch." [19:25]
5. Infamous Funeral Side Chick
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[21:44] – The viral video of a side chick jumping into her partner’s grave in front of his family. Comic relief meets real critique.
- TamBam: "You hopping in the grave you ain’t paid for, bitch." [21:56]
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Debate about side women showing up at funerals and expectations for respect and privacy.
6. Random: Kenya Hill’s (ANTM) Odd Encounter
- [24:27] – Model Kenya Hill threatens to sue a streamer for rejecting her public kiss on livestream.
- Discussion about women's inability to handle rejection in the social media age.
- AJ: "I'm confused as to why she wanted this stranger to kiss her in the first place. Was she just found him attractive or something or what was that about? It was kind of weird, right?" [25:43]
7. Main Topic: Can Relationships Survive When Women Out-Earn Men?
Set-Up: Kandi Burruss’s Divorce
- [26:48] – Candy Burruss files for divorce, prompting deeper questions about gender roles and financial power.
- “Can women be more successful than their spouse and stay in a relationship?” [26:56]
Key Discussion Points
- Role Reversal & Resentment
[32:50] – “A man's value is directly tied to what he brings to the table. So if he's not the breadwinner, is he a valuable partner?” – AJ - Male Ego & Relationship Power
[34:24] – TamBam doubts most men can truly handle their partner out-earning them:- "Men say that they can deal with that, but I really don't think they can."
- Real Life Examples: Strain, Sabotage, and Shrinking
- Women often “shrink” their success for men. Relationships can become competitive, not cooperative.
- Fair Division: Who Keeps What?
- "You leave with what you came with or whatever we acquired together." – TamBam [34:00]
- Emotional Labor & Value
[56:03] – “For men, your value isn't only financial. So that's the biggest one.” – AJ - Successful Women, Contentment & The Trap of Overcompensation
[35:17] – TamBam: "The woman is always, like, overcompensating for him." - When It Works — Rarity and Requirements
- “When a man is emotionally secure, the roles are flexible, not rigid. Both partners value teamwork over power, and communication is honest and consistent.” – AJ [44:57]
8. Memorable Quotes & Moments
TamBam on male ego and breadwinning:
"The sweet spot for men is being a breadwinner. I just think that's where they are more comfortable." [62:57]
AJ on what kills relationships:
"Success doesn't kill relationships. Ego does." [68:00]
TamBam’s rule on choosing men:
"Find a nigga who make more money than you. That is still the standard." [67:51]
AJ’s advice on shrinking:
"Don’t dim your light ever. Choose emotionally mature men … Pay attention to his reaction to your success." [48:43]
TamBam’s anecdote on unsupportive partners:
"The first thing he says to me all day that day is, 'You a hoe.' … That was the first thing he said to me and it really was, you know, to make me feel a way about myself. But when you know thyself, can nobody do that to you." [49:11, 51:41]
9. Advice for Listeners
For Women:
- Never shrink for a man.
- Choose emotionally mature partners who don’t resent your success.
- Celebrate yourself, and set boundaries early.
For Men:
- Your value is not solely financial.
- Learn to contribute emotionally; celebrate your partner’s wins as your own.
- Avoid competition—practice partnership and honest communication.
Final Takeaways
- Ego—not success or money—is the real killer in relationships.
- Men and women both need to know themselves, communicate, and choose wisely.
- If you can’t celebrate your partner, you’re in the wrong partnership.
- Society still expects, and most people are comfortable with, the man as breadwinner—going against the grain creates challenges, but they can be overcome with emotional maturity and true partnership.
“Know your personnel and don’t be on your partner. There’s a reason why you got with this person. Know the ebbs and flow of life—they might not always be up, you ain’t always gonna be down. But expect it, know who you’re with.” – TamBam [67:08]
Tune in every Thursday for more raw, real, and hilarious takes from TamBam & AJ Holiday.
