Podcast Summary

We Talk Back – “Black Don't Crack, But It Do Cost”

Hosts: TamBam & AJ
Date: August 28, 2025
Podcast Network: The Black Effect & iHeartRadio

Episode Overview

In this episode, TamBam and AJ dive into the real cost of "Black don't crack"—the cultural pride and pressure around maintaining youthful, flawless appearances as Black women. They explore the intersection of beauty, self-care, societal expectations, and the hefty price tags behind it all, with their signature blend of humor, honesty, and cultural critique. No topic is off-limits: they break down everything from cosmetic procedures and beauty budgets to the deeper issues of self-worth, financial priorities, and the sometimes toxic cycle of over-consumption in the Black community.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Life Updates and Relocation Talk

[03:23–04:43]

• TamBam shares her recent move out of New York, debating future locations (maybe Atlanta or Texas), while AJ says her next step is likely out of the country due to draining energies and high costs.
• Discussion on the importance of cost of living, business, and taxes when choosing where to live.

2. Babies, Beauty, and Black Genetics

[05:29–06:44]

• TamBam gushes over meeting a friend's newborn, joking about wanting to steal the baby due to cuteness overload.
• Reflection on how baby boys and men often have the best features (lashes, edges), sparking envy and laughter.

3. Dating, Money, and Value – The Sasha Vickery Story

[06:57–09:19]

• AJ introduces pro tennis player Sasha Vickery’s policy: a $1,000 deposit for a date, citing negative experiences with men.
  • Quote [08:55] AJ: “I ain’t mad. And if the men are willing to pay for it, like, who complaining?”
• Comparison to celebrities charging for meet & greets (Chris Brown: $1,200; Dr. Umar: $500).
• Conversation on OnlyFans and women monetizing desirability.

4. Celebrity Interactions and Relationship Boundaries

[09:21–11:25]

• Viral story: A woman gets dumped after hugging Chris Brown at a meet & greet. The hosts discuss the harmlessness of celebrity crushes and the pettiness of jealousy.
  • Quote [09:40] TamBam: "I will trade my boyfriend for a meet and greet with Chris Brown a hundred more times."
  • Quote [11:10] AJ: "He probably jealous Chris Brown dick wasn’t on his back."

5. Relationship Needs – The '47 Minutes' Study

[12:29–16:25]

• AJ reads about a study that claims women need 47 minutes of undivided daily attention from their partners for fulfillment.
  • Wry humor about the oddly specific number and whether a minute less could ruin a relationship.
  • Quote [15:08] TamBam: “Was 46 minutes... and the bitch was like, I’m still sad.”
• TamBam shares a story about a man not checking on her after a scary situation, signaling a relationship red flag.

6. The Real Cost of Looking Good – Skincare, Cosmetic Procedures, and Upkeep

[18:13–31:33]

• Segue into the main theme: the literal and figurative cost of "Black don't crack."
  • Stories of spending on Botox, chin filler, and even upcoming chin lipo.
    • Quote [24:05] TamBam: “I just had some Botox in my forehead.”
    • Quote [26:36] TamBam: “Between the chin filler, the Botox in my forehead, I be spending, like, a stack [a thousand dollars].”
  • AJ talks about cosmetic mishaps, including a chemical peel gone horribly wrong.
  • Reflection on the confidence boost vs. the potential self-sabotage of overspending to look like “the filter.”

7. Splurging on Outfits and Bodily Enhancements

[31:33–36:42]

• TamBam’s story: renting a designer dress for Miami, only to pay $2,000 after a club fight ruins it.
• Both hosts reflect on unnecessary cosmetic procedures and the often minimal real-life results, cautioning listeners about where to spend.

8. Self-Care vs. Self-Sabotage

[37:42–43:32]

• Is the beauty upkeep self-love or self-sabotage?
  • AJ: Disclaimers in dating about always having a weave and why she doesn’t reveal her natural hair to new partners unless it’s done.
    • Quote [41:17] AJ: “I think it’s self-love. I don’t think it’s self-sabotaging in any type of way.”
• Both discuss boundaries in relationships about appearance and the importance of maintaining some personal “mystique.”

9. Beauty Budgets, Community Consumption, and Culture of Spending

[43:32–60:00+]

• National stats: Black consumers spent $9.4B on beauty in 2024; expected to hit $10.2B.
  • [51:15] TamBam: “We are the greatest spenders in the country, even though we make up a fraction of it.”
• Problems in prioritizing aesthetics over essentials (rent, savings, health).
  • Quote [48:41] AJ: “Niggas will wear the money instead of actually having it.”
• Effects on kids: parents splurging on designer for children who’ll outgrow or destroy it.
  • Quote [55:30] TamBam: “He is three years old. If you don’t want him to scruff them shoes, get him some little Pokémons.”

10. Prioritizing Wealth: Home, Life Insurance, and Smarter Spending

[59:40+]

• Why real wealth isn’t about flashy spending; most wealthy people aren’t label-obsessed.
• Black families urged to prioritize life insurance and investments over material consumerism.
  • Quote [71:57] AJ: “Nobody had life insurance, right? ... You better sell some of them bags, bitch, because I don’t know what to tell you.”

11. Quickfire Budget Game

[66:45–70:09]

• “Spend or Save” dilemma game: Would you buy a designer bag or buy groceries?
• Both favor practical choices as older women, poking fun at priorities and bad lash experiences.
  • Quote [67:58] TamBam: “And say, I’m fasting. Bitch, you’re broke.”

12. Community and Cultural reflections

[57:50–66:33]

• Societal pressures, including mean-spirited criticisms of women’s bodies online (Nelly Furtado example) from men who don’t measure up.
  • Quote [62:18] TamBam (on trolling men): “How dare you over there... dirty fingernails, balding head, fucking stomach hanging over your pants cracks showing, dusty, rusty ass, got the nerve to talk about this woman...”

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• [08:55] AJ: “I ain’t mad [about $1,000 date deposits]. And if the men are willing to pay for it, like, who complaining?”
• [12:29-15:08] Hilarious riff on “47 minutes of attention” for women’s relationship happiness.
• [24:05] TamBam: “It’s not all just melanin. It’s also a little bit of nip tuck facial structure.”
• [48:41] AJ: “Niggas will wear the money instead of actually having it.”
• [55:30] TamBam: “He is three years old... get him some little Pokémons or something, you know?”
• [59:54] AJ: “Rich people really don’t spend money, okay? ...We are the consumers.”
• [62:18] TamBam: “How dare you over there with dirty fingernails, balding head... got the nerve to talk about this woman because she put on weight.”

Practical Tips & Takeaways

• Balance is key: Don’t sacrifice essential needs or savings for luxury purchases.
• Cosmetic spending adds up: Even moderate procedures like Botox or filler can grow into thousands over a year.
• Prioritize self-worth over appearance: True confidence isn’t attached to brands, filters, or trends.
• Don’t succumb to peer pressure: It’s not “self-love” if it leaves you broke or unhealthy.
• Invest in health and security: Life insurance, sound budgeting, and homeownership should come before designer bags or unnecessary cosmetics.

Timestamps of Important Segments

• [02:34] – Podcast intro, hosts check-in
• [06:57] – Sasha Vickery's $1,000 dating policy
• [09:21] – Viral Chris Brown meet & greet breakup story
• [12:29] – “47 minutes” relationship study
• [18:13] – Core episode topic: “Black don’t crack, but it do cost”
• [23:06] – Airport story: “How y’all do that?”
• [24:05–26:36] – Cosmetic procedures: Botox, fillers, and prices
• [28:21] – Chemical peel horror story
• [31:33] – Splurging on outfits and failed cosmetic surgery
• [41:17] – Self-love vs. performing for men (weave, boundaries)
• [51:15] – Black beauty spending statistics
• [55:30] – Designer goods for kids and misplaced priorities
• [59:54] – How real wealth works & consumer culture
• [66:45] – Budgeting and “spend/save” game
• [71:57] – Life insurance and community advice
• [74:21] – "Dumb Bitch Story": Buying a car for a woman who ghosted
• [77:25] – Final advice on beauty, spending, and balance

Tone & Language

• Conversational, comedic, and unfiltered
• Emphasis on real-life experiences, cultural critique, and practical wisdom
• Supportive, honest, and occasionally irreverent

Closing Thoughts

TamBam and AJ wrap up with a heartfelt reminder: love yourself, invest in what truly matters, and don’t let consumerism define your worth. Splurge if you want, but save, plan, and keep your eyes open to the bigger picture—because “Black don’t crack, but it do cost,” and that bill always comes due.

For full details, advice, and plenty of laughs, listen to the complete episode on your favorite podcast platform!