We Talk Back Replay* | Bring Back Shame

Summary

We Talk Back Replay | Bring Back Shame — Detailed Episode Summary*

Release Date: January 16, 2025
Host/Authors: TamBam & AJ Holiday
Produced by: The Black Effect and iHeartPodcasts

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Introduction to "We Talk Back"

At [02:38], Tam Bam warmly welcomes listeners to the latest episode of the "We Talk Back" podcast, a collaborative production by iHeartRadio and the Black Effect Network. Alongside her co-host, AJ Holiday, Tam Bam sets the stage for an engaging conversation aimed at guiding femininity to its ultimate greatness through raw, unfiltered, and comedic repartee.

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Body Image and Personal Fitness Journeys

• Body Types and Personal Goals
  Tam Bam and Harley Quinn Smith dive into an open discussion about their personal experiences with body image. Tam Bam shares her long journey from being slim in her younger years to dealing with social pressures upon returning to the South.

  • Tam Bam (03:12): "I want to be one of them in between for the rest of my life. Okay? So that's my goal."
  • Harley Quinn Smith (03:25): "I've been on every area of the spectrum. I've been a big back burly. I've been skinny. And now finally visiting the in between kinda."

• Impact of Social Environments on Fitness
  The hosts explore how social settings, such as being surrounded by friends or engaging in social drinking, can derail fitness goals.

  • Tam Bam (04:05): "When I'm isolated someplace by myself, I be looking my best. It's like as soon as you start being around motherfuckers, social, drinking all the time, eating."

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Sexuality, Abstinence, and Creative Energy

• Choosing Abstinence for Creativity
  AJ Holiday shares insights into how abstaining from sexual activities has heightened his creative focus.

  • Harley Quinn Smith (04:16): "I think there might be a correlation between the two."
  • Tam Bam (04:30): "Sexual energy goes into your creative energy. So you just did a little swap out and now you're more focused without dick clouding your brain."

• Cultural Commentary on Sexuality
  The conversation touches on societal expectations regarding sexual activity, citing rapper Dreezy's statement on abstinence.

  • Tam Bam (05:19): "People don't realize it's like really getting to know the really finding out people antics and all the hard part. That's why it's okay to wait."

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Navigating Current Events and Social Media Pressures

• Beef Between Drake and Kendrick Lamar
  Tam Bam and Harley Quinn discuss the escalating tensions between Drake and Kendrick Lamar, analyzing the potential deeper issues beyond their publicly released music.

  • Tam Bam (10:11): "From what we know, there has to be more going on behind the scenes than just these songs."
  • Harley Quinn Smith (14:16): "But music is not the way people dancing... that's not how it should be brought to the light."

• Impact of Public Shaming and Racism
  The hosts critique DJ Vlad's involvement in black affairs, highlighting systemic racism and the misuse of power by white individuals in influential positions.

  • Tam Bam (20:01): "How dare you black woman be a professor at an Ivy League college, right? How dare you."
  • Harley Quinn Smith (20:23): "But then he double back and was like, I didn't mean it like that."

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Public vs. Internal Shame

• Definitions and Distinctions
  The conversation shifts to defining shame, distinguishing between public and internal shame, and discussing their personal struggles with both.

  • Tam Bam (33:25): "Shame is a painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by the consciousness of wrong or foolish behavior."
  • Harley Quinn Smith (34:23): "You look at yourself in the mirror, you feel great. But I'm like, you're disappointed."

• Consequences of Social Media-Induced Shame
  The hosts argue that social media amplifies shame without tangible consequences, leading to destructive behavior and misunderstanding.

  • AJ Holiday (38:07): "Social media doesn't come with any consequence. You can see people get mad when social media starts to come with consequence."

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Relationships, Communication, and Emotional Support

• Expectations in Relationships
  Tam Bam and AJ Holiday debate the role of emotional intelligence in relationships, questioning whether men should be open about their feelings without burdening their partners.

  • Harley Quinn Smith (58:12): "I'm not trying to control him. I just want to share."
  • AJ Holiday (58:27): "Exactly. That's the problem. Because if you start telling a woman your feelings, you're a therapist."

• Shame in Personal Relationships
  Personal anecdotes reveal the complexity of addressing shame within romantic relationships, emphasizing the need for genuine communication without emotional exploitation.

  • Tam Bam (60:00): "Men should not get into the habit of unpacking all this onto a woman and then wanting her to use those things that he's told her to justify bad behavior."

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Personal Anecdotes and Experiences with Shame

• Tam Bam’s Teenage Pregnancy
  Tam Bam opens up about a past teenage pregnancy, expressing deep personal shame and the fear of public judgment.

  • Tam Bam (50:20): "I am ashamed of that. I would never, like, show somebody this person that I lit sweat on me one time in life."

• Karen’s High School Incident
  Karen from "Cancellation Island" shares a harrowing experience from her high school years, detailing false accusations and the lasting impact on her reputation.

  • Karen (84:07): "My whole life is defined by shame. I mean like, you want like a.... Just something you don't want people to know."

• AJ Holiday’s Relationship Exploits
  AJ recounts a series of regrettable relationships, highlighting his own involvement in perpetuating shame and his efforts to change.

  • AJ Holiday (76:34): "I do not change. I do never. I don't think I'm too good for no woman."

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Discussions on Money, Power, and Exploitation

• Understanding Money as a Tool
  The hosts explore the concept of money beyond its physical form, discussing its role as a metric of value and its influence on societal dynamics.

  • Karen (71:55): "It's a measuring stick, it's a metric. It's not representative of wealth."

• Exploitation in the Strip Club Industry
  A critical look at the financial realities faced by strippers, debunking myths about their earnings and exposing the exploitation inherent in the industry.

  • Tam Bam (70:14): "How they recycle money or just carry around the same knot..."
  • Karen (71:18): "It's the way America treats you. It's the way you position a dollar itself."

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Conclusion: Empowerment Through Self-Awareness and Accountability

As the episode draws to a close, Tam Bam and AJ Holiday emphasize the importance of self-awareness and accountability in overcoming shame. They advocate for fostering environments where individuals can express themselves without fear of public humiliation, ultimately striving for personal growth and healthier relationships.

• Tam Bam (67:57): "We need more wise men and daddies and uncles."
• AJ Holiday (83:04): "Words are important... we cannot have children."

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Notable Quotes

• Tam Bam ([03:12]): "I want to be one of them in between for the rest of my life. Okay? So that's my goal."
• Harley Quinn Smith ([04:16]): "I think there might be a correlation between the two."
• Tam Bam ([10:11]): "From what we know, there has to be more going on behind the scenes than just these songs."
• Tam Bam ([33:25]): "Shame is a painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by the consciousness of wrong or foolish behavior."
• Harley Quinn Smith ([58:12]): "I'm not trying to control him. I just want to share."
• Tam Bam ([67:57]): "We need more wise men and daddies and uncles."

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Final Remarks

Tam Bam and AJ Holiday wrap up the episode by encouraging listeners to engage with the podcast on their preferred platforms, including iHeartRadio and Apple Podcasts. They also promote their collaboration with label mates on future episodes, promising continued insightful and thought-provoking discussions.

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Join the Conversation

Stay connected with Tam Bam and AJ Holiday on Instagram and follow the "We Talk Back" podcast for more enlightening conversations every Thursday.

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Disclaimer: This summary is based on the transcript provided and aims to encapsulate the key discussions and themes explored in the episode. For the full experience, listen to the episode on your preferred podcast platform.

Transcript

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[Tam Bam]

Panoramic moonroof, ambient lighting, bows and massaging leather. Appointed seats are optional features.

[John Cameron Mitchell]

This is John Cameron Mitchell and my new fiction podcast series Cancellation island stars Holly Hunter as Karen, a wellness influencer who launches a rehab for the recently cancelled. In the future, we will all be canceled for 15 minutes, but don't worry, we'll take you from broke to woke or your money back. Cancellation Island's revolutionary rehab therapies like bad touch football, anti racism spin class and mandatory ayahuasca ceremonies are designed to force the council to confront their worst impulses. But everything starts to fall apart when people start disappearing.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Karen, where have you brought us?

[John Cameron Mitchell]

Cancellation island, where a second chance might just be your last. Listen to Cancellation island on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Kevin Smith]

Hey, kids, it's me, Kevin Smith.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

And it's me, Harley Quinn Smith.

[Kevin Smith]

That's my daughter, man, who my wife has always said is just a beardless d ckless version of me. And that's the name of our podcast, Beardless Me. I'm the old one, I'm the young one. And every week we try to make each other laugh really hard. Sounds innocent, doesn't it? A lot of cussing, a lot of bad language. It's for adults only. Or listen to it with your kid. Could be a family show. We're not quite sure. We're still figuring it.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

It's a work in progress.

[Kevin Smith]

Listen to Beardless with me on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Damien Hurst]

Do you remember what you said the first night I came over here?

[AJ Holiday]

Ow. Go slower.

[Damien Hurst]

From Blumhouse TV, iHeart podcasts and Ember 20 comes an all new fictional comedy podcast series. Join the flighty Damien Hirst as he unravels the mystery of his vanished boyfriend. I've been spending all my time looking for answers about what happened to Santi and what's the way to find a missing person sleep with everyone he knew, obviously. Listen to the hookup on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.

[Tam Bam]

Welcome to We Talk Back podcast, a production of iHeartRadio and the Black Effect Network.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

We're just two unapologetically black women with an opinion who talk back. What's up, y'all?

[Tam Bam]

Thank you for tuning in for a new episode of We Talk Fat, a show dedicated to you, big back, burly and slim. Okay. This is your co host, AJ Holiday. What's up, Tam Bam?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Everybody in between we. She said that because we just got finished talking about this. We ain't gonna tell y'all which but one of them. One of them, girl.

[Tam Bam]

But I want to be one of them in between for the rest of my life. Okay? So that's my goal.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yes. I've been. I've been on every area of the spectrum. I've been a big back burly. I've been a skinny. And now finally visiting the in between kinda. My back still kind of linebackery, but it's getting smaller.

[Tam Bam]

I've been a skinny since like 2000. And when I was living in Columbia, once upon a time, I had got real slim on them. Even when I lived in St. Louis, I was slim as hell. And I came back south with all the bullshit.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

See, when I beans and rice out this motherfucker.

[Tam Bam]

Yeah. When I'm isolated someplace by myself, I be looking my best. It's like as soon as you start being around motherfuckers, social, drinking all the.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Time, eating, listen, I think I'm in the best shape I've been in in a long time and I ain't had no dick all year long. And I think there might be a correlation between the two.

[Tam Bam]

Yes. Because now I really do. And you know that sexual energy goes into your creative energy. So you just did a little swap out and now you're more focused without dick clouding your brain and dealing with men. I saw Dreezy, one of my favorite rappers. She was on Poor Minds, and she was saying how she hadn't had sex in two months. And you know the thing people don't realize is that like sex is the easy part. It's like really getting to know the really finding out people antics and all the. That's the hard part. And that takes time. So that's why it's okay to wait. Sometimes I think the older we get, the longer we be waiting to spend. I don't even be. I'd be good. Okay. I don't gotta smash all the time, especially when you guys.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I miss it. I watch this dude on Snapchat and he posts his dick every morning and I. That's my morning affirmation.

[Tam Bam]

That's. That's all you be thinking. Tick, tick, tick. Be at the gym, at spend spin class. Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick with the beat of the song.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I miss it, but it's okay. I'll be fine without it Till I meet me a nice. A proper suitor. That's what I'm waiting on, the proper suitor.

[Tam Bam]

Shame.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

And not a moment before. Let's get in this. Oh, wait. Your weekend.

[Tam Bam]

I do. What did I do this weekend?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

It was Cinco de Drinko.

[Tam Bam]

Yeah, not Cinco de Drinko. Cinco de Negro. I do nothing. I didn't even go off a Cinco de Mayo. I think Saturday was raining real hard. I'd be reneging a lot, man. It was so many different things to do this weekend. Last weekend, I just didn't do anything. This weekend they have like a little Greek festival, so I might go check that out in the city.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

But I didn't. I went out Friday night. I met some friends at a bar for a couple drinks, but I was home by 11. I drank so much the weekend before while we was in Atlanta. Like, I feel like I drank Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday. Then I drank on Tuesday. Then I drank again on Thursday. I was like, all right, I don't care what holiday it is this weekend. I cannot drink another. And then I still drink on Friday a little bit. So I was like, Saturday and Sunday, I'm not. I don't care what holiday it is. I don't want no more.

[Tam Bam]

I can't do it no more, y'all. I've been buying Costco brand tequila. Tammy had that when she came down here.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yes, it's good all day. The next sick. I was sick the next day.

[Tam Bam]

That's because your ass is smoking too. See, I gotta choose one. I can't do both ever. Okay.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

And then I always do both.

[Tam Bam]

Yeah, you be tripping.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I always do both. But that Costco brand. Had that hurt the next day.

[Tam Bam]

Kirkland, Costco, Kirkland brand. That should be good as hell. You can get the anejo. Okay. Tequila for $30. 29.99. I like, was.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I mean, it went down smooth.

[Tam Bam]

You know, a lot of times you just gotta use the bathroom after drinking. You gotta get that stuff out your. Out your body after you finish drinking. So if you don't pass a bowel movement, it'd be, like, stuck in you.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Typically, if I eat something greasy and drink a bunch of water before I go to bed, I'll be okay the next day. But if I. If I'm eating, like, how I'm eating now, it's all bad the next day, life feel like it need to be over the next.

[Tam Bam]

Y'all better stop trying to act like y'all young man. Listen, my body does not process alcohol well. Like, I be really up, up. I ruined my whole next day because of three drinks. So my max, like, nowadays is like two drinks. That's it.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

That's two drinks?

[Tam Bam]

Yeah. That's enough to where the drunk people around me don't annoy me. I'm enough, like, I got enough in my system to deal with somebody else's drunkenness.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

That's all you drink when you go out is two drinks.

[Tam Bam]

Yeah, I don't. I can't drink too much, man. I can't. I don't be feeling good. We literally poison ourselves. It's poison.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Damn justice. Get out and live a little.

[Tam Bam]

Wait a minute.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Hold on.

[Tam Bam]

Before.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

It's a whole big world out there for you to fuck up in.

[Tam Bam]

Hold on. Before we get into stupid Internet news. Did you see how. See, I didn't realize this. That poetic justice coincide with boys in the hood. Did you realize that?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I did.

[Tam Bam]

I didn't realize it.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I felt like it did. Nah, it's all some of the same bitches in the same neighborhood in the same. It felt. It felt the same. It felt like the same.

[Tam Bam]

And the character that Regina King plays, she was like, yeah, I'm against so and so the same N from the cookout on Boyz n the hood to beat your ass.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

That was funny. I didn't.

[Tam Bam]

I didn't realize.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yeah, I didn't. I didn't realize that. But it felt like the same group of people, right? Did it not?

[Tam Bam]

No, it was just one person that was from the other movie, which was Regina King. Everybody else was characters.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

It seemed like the same. Around the same time, the same neighborhood, right?

[Tam Bam]

No, no, no. I never. It did feel like I never made that connection until I saw that on social media. You learn something new every day. Yeah.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Let's get into sis. What happened, girl?

[Tam Bam]

Oh, that's what I did do this weekend. Okay, wait, this. These niggas had me in a chokehold on Instagram and between Instagram, YouTube, the blogs, trying to see who responded, who said what. So let's run through right quick. Just a chain of events from this past weekend.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

She y'all she talking about Kendrick Lamar and Drake.

[Tam Bam]

Yes. These niggas. Well, one of them is a nigga, apparently.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

That shit had me stressed. I was. I had to log out of everybody, the whole world. I had to log out. I was like this. I cannot consume much more, y'all.

[Tam Bam]

We gotta. We talk back. Group chat. Okay, okay. It's us and our producers. And this got out, I had to create a whole separate account, a separate text thread, so, you know, she can live over there. But one accidentally sent one extra thing, and that left the group like I did and did. Oh.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

And that's what I said. S1 before it happened. I said, send more. One more thing and see if I don't leave this group chat.

[Tam Bam]

Bye, Felipe.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Look, exit stage left.

[Tam Bam]

Who team? Y'all think Tammy on leaving the group.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I don't have a team.

[Tam Bam]

You got a team.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Listen, listen, I. You know, if I was on the team, it would be Team Drake. But then it got too dark. All of it got too dark. And now I don't. I'm on Team J. Cole. As much as I love Drake, I'm Team J. Cole. Like, pedophilia, child molestation, domestic violence, colorism. It was just too much darkness. It was. It was too dark for me. Okay? You know, I'm. I'm in the gym. I'm. I'm on a light plane right now. I feel I have too much endorphins for that.

[Tam Bam]

I hear that girl. I dwell between the both, okay? Light and dark over here. That's what self awareness is. When I know she can get stupid if need be. And otherwise, I'm here. Okay? But, yeah, okay, so now this whole been going on, like, I know for a fact that there are some things that are not. I don't know for a fact. I'm just saying, okay? I'm speculating. There has to be more going on behind the scenes than just these songs. Okay? Because there was a lot of vitriol that came out in those last two songs from Drake and from Kendrick Lamar. So from what we know, right, the public, this is started on October 6th with first person shooter with Drake and J. Cole. This is where J. Cole, I don't respect how he bowed out because why are you even on that song if you cool with Kendrick Lamar? Because that whole song was like a big shot at a bunch of different people. Drake, was everybody okay with lyrics? Of course. Okay, right? So just March 22nd this year now Kendrick Lamar features on Future on. Yeah. Futures Song like that. Okay? Everybody was going, wow. I even made A little Gemini post. Listen, I trust Geminis. I trust their judgment because I know.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

You about to go through the whole time, everything that happened.

[Tam Bam]

No, no, no, no, no. We don't have to. But I mean everybody know the last couple days, which songs the last two songs. Not Like Us. Okay. We got a club banger for the summer. Okay. And then the Heart part six. Drake was his response to like that.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Actually three Distance Not Like Us three.

[Tam Bam]

Three diss tracks later. No, Not Like Us was J. Cole. I'm what the Not Like Us was Kendrick Lamar.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

And then the Heart Part six was the response.

[Tam Bam]

Yeah. So he basically stole Kendrick Lamar's songs too. Because Kendrick Lamar has the heart one through five. So Drake stole his.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

His song the Hard Part.

[Tam Bam]

So I just felt like Drake did a lot of. A lot of explaining on the part six. Now has gotten real because now somebody has shot a security guard in front of Drake's Toronto mansion. Okay. So I didn't feel like could get like to that type of beef and I don't think it's them. Okay. I think we have to. They need to take into consideration that it's crazy people out here who takes this entertainment and go left with it.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Everybody's pouring and feeding this dark energy. They're feeding it, feeding it, feeding it.

[Tam Bam]

It doesn't feel dark to me though. It really doesn't. The thing is, is that pedophilia, child.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Molestation, domestic violence, that don't feel dark to you?

[Tam Bam]

Listen, we live in America where trafficking that stuff has always been an industry in America. But it also needs to be. It needs to come to the light. It should no longer be taboo. So if somebody is dwelling in that type of darkness, they do need to be ostracized. They do need to be put out on front street. I don't think that's something that a real would just say about somebody with no merit. I just don't think so.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I. I agree, but I don't think music is the way people dancing and he's a pedophile dancing in a club to the song. That's not.

[Tam Bam]

No, no.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

That's not how it should be brought to the light.

[Tam Bam]

It's actually you're a freaky 66 and not God 69 guy.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

It should be more. It should be a serious thing where, you know, you taking serious action against people who are doing these things. Not rap. These rap battles are just like blogs to beat as far as I'm concerned. This ain't nothing but an episode of Mari to be. I actually, I didn't even listen to Drake last song. And y'all know how much I love Drake. I'm one of Drake's biggest fans in the world. Okay. And I, I left. I left. I didn't even support the last song because it just was. None of it made me feel good, you know?

[Tam Bam]

Yeah. So it was a whole two week gap in between Drake's. Drake's song and well, Drake's reply to the. The lyric, the one part of future song was a whole two weeks. And then Kendrick Lamar came through like a wrecking ball on last week, Monday also, you know, right before. I guess right before like that came out. What. What day was that? Hold on. On the 29th, the Weeknd, which is another name that was dropped through some songs. Abel. Right. Kendrick Lamar. Actually Kendrick Lamar didn't drop the weekend's name. Drake dropped the Weeknd's name. Like dissing the weekend. Also another Canadian superstar and his co manager's house was shot up or the security guard was shot at his house on the 29th also. And this is before all this even kind of. This is the 29th was when this is way. This is before all of this kind of started this month. Anyway, 29th of April.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I just, I just hope don't nobody else get hurt behind this because these take these songs real serious even if.

[Tam Bam]

The people singing them aren't. Yeah. Like people a lot of. There are a lot of grown adults who don't know the difference between entertainment and. And like this is not reality.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

It don't have it. Yeah. Until somebody dies though. Like that's it. And then listen, I left the group chat because I just was like annoyed with the conversation. I didn't want no more parts of it. When we talked again, Taylor was like, hey, I want you to know I love you. I'm like, girl, it's not that deep. Not mad but it's people really out there falling out behind like this Girl.

[Tam Bam]

This worse than a election. Like I fell out about my. With my mom about who I voted for. Like she might be on Drake's side. This might be something else to be.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Argued about at a. Yeah, that's what I hope. I hope that people are discussing the election like this. Are we going to get up in arms and. And have a timeline for this election? Because then we might be. All right, don't care about that.

[Tam Bam]

But everybody beefing. I was looking forward to another response from Kendrick, but I guess he probably just let it go. Like you explaining or maybe he waiting.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

For what can't do it all on one day. God damn. People need a break. Let's watch the playoffs and then when the playoffs is over, maybe drop a song.

[Tam Bam]

Right? God damn shame. So what else we got going on? Oh, girl dog. So this is still a lot. So like along the lines of the. That's going on with Drake and Kendrick Lamar. But DJ Vlad had been posting and you know, I got some choice words for DJ Vlad and I really wish black men would stop sitting down with him. For real, man. Now after this last thing like so there's a. A former Princeton University professor commented back to Vlad and told him basically stay out of black folks business. He just started going in like I'm pretty sure a lot of people was adding him responding to his post or whatever. I'm. I'm trying to figure out why you chose this woman in particular to go at her job. To go at her job also, you know what I'm saying? To go at. Go after her livelihood. It just seemed kind of weird to me. But expected.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

He, he like he tried to do. I'm gonna do a you on you. That's what, that's what he thought he was doing. But it don't work the same, baby. No, it don't work.

[Tam Bam]

And that's what racism is, right? Because you have the power to actually put stuff, put a machine behind your prejudice. Right? We don't have the power to do that. So you white man who graduated from an Ivy League school. School probably have. You're. We are well connected and they have planted you in. I believe in hip hop in the culture, right? He's there. He don't even be in studio with these people. They literally be talking to him over an iPad or a screen because, you know, you always just see their faces. You don't ever see his face in his videos. Why y'all still going over there? It's weird to me. Stop going over there.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Because she said that you weren't black and this wasn't a black affair. You really wanted to take her job. That was what you thought of. That's.

[Tam Bam]

And it's because it was Princeton. Because if it was Benedict College, he wouldn't give a. But how dare you black woman be a professor at an Ivy League college, right? How dare you.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

And. And then tell me I'm white and this is a black affair.

[Tam Bam]

How dare you. Yeah, no, you're not involved.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

But then he double. He doubled back and was like, I didn't mean it like that. I wasn't gonna do it.

[Tam Bam]

I was just talk about the damage is already Done. And see, that is the same way I feel about how Drake posted those text messages between him and his mom and called Rick Ross racist. You know what I'm saying? I feel the same exact way. Like, who are you signaling when you do that? We don't want to hear you say no more. Anyway.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I feel like he can say it.

[Tam Bam]

Whatever, girl. Let him say why he hit that ass. Okay.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yep. Y'all.

[Tam Bam]

Did you see the Tom Brady roast? The Netflix Tom Brady roast?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I had to watch. I. First of all, that was about 17 hours long. I don't know why it was so long. I had to watch it in three parts. But that was funny. I enjoy every bit of it. Tom Brady looks so uncomfortable with half of them jokes. And he just kind of grinned and buried or kind of grinned because his face so tight. Don't he look like kind of like the American Psycho a little bit?

[Tam Bam]

Yes. He fine now. He's a nice looking man, but I'm pretty sure he's gotten Botox.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Oh, yeah. And filler and all that.

[Tam Bam]

He better not play with his wife, man. She a whole witch. He even said it before and this is why Giselle. Yes.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Well, they. They getting a divorce.

[Tam Bam]

No, they divorced. Yeah.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Oh, they are divorced. When you say his wife. Well, his ex wife.

[Tam Bam]

I did say X wife.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

No, you said his wife.

[Tam Bam]

I see. I. Oh. Anyway, he better not play with his ex wife because she then people play with her all night and she didn't appreciate it either.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I would have been mad as hell if I was Giselle. He said, somebody said, you put the jizz in Giselle.

[Tam Bam]

Listen, I'm all for jokes and actually like those. That type of joke, like jonesing off each of of people. Like, that's my favorite type of comedy. Really?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Me too.

[Tam Bam]

You know what I'm saying? Because I got an hour worth of stand up for a trying to play with me. Okay. When you chunky with a Jerry curl in elementary school, you better have jokes because after you talk about this juice, I'm coming for your crackhead ass mama next period.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I always had jokes like, so it's funny. And if. If people like, I don't think I'm the type of person who could be roasted like that. Like be the person who everybody came out to roast. I know it's done in love, but something that I'd be ready to fight.

[Tam Bam]

I think it's a whole ritual. Y'all know I go, yeah, I don't think it's nor it's not normal to have someone centered in that way and then spew all these ridicules at them. That's what it is. In a joking manner. It's not funny. Like, it's funny, but it's not funny because it's like you're really telling this person's business in front of a room of people plus the whole world. It's humiliating. It's very humiliating.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yeah, yeah. I would have been like, say you went too far that time and be fighting that.

[Tam Bam]

You see like, you know how them your mama jokes turn into hands.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yeah, yeah, absolutely.

[Tam Bam]

I'm catching somebody in the parking lot after the Netflix special.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

After. During that. Gonna turn into a WWE out there.

[Tam Bam]

I mean, Will Smith walking up on the stage. Keep my name out your mouth.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Just slap the. Yeah. Real quick.

[AJ Holiday]

Ah.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

That's why they don't have that many of them. Because people, you know, people don't want to participate.

[Tam Bam]

And Kim K. They got on Kim K. Two, if you got your ass.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Up on that stage, you were. You. You had to be open to it.

[Tam Bam]

She didn't look comfortable with the jokes that was coming back at her at all.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

No.

[Tam Bam]

And you got to know all of it's scripted. You know what I'm saying? All that is scripted because some of them people aren't comedians. Like, Kim Kardashian is not a comedian.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yeah. Somebody wrote that for her.

[Tam Bam]

Yeah. And then the responses that Tom Brady had, He's not a comedian. Okay. Him talking about Kanye and the kids. Be home with Kanye and all this. That's. This all scripted. Like who? Like, it's just weird to me. I don't. I would never want to participate in some like that because I might shoot that whole thing up.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yeah, me too. I ain't with it.

[Tam Bam]

For real.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I be giggling at first, and then. And then it's up.

[Dylan Mulvaney]

The first two years of 2025 have been quite a year. Work deadlines, group chats you can't escape, and your world cousin's latest overshare. It's a lot. But here's the good news. You don't have to bring that stress into your car. The all new Nissan Murano is your piece on wheels, thanks to its available features. Imagine sliding into the relaxing, massaging seats that feel like they were made to melt your tensions. Take in the skyline views that let the sunlight pour in and watch as your day brightens. I have a special playlist that always gets me right. And with the Bose premium sound system, you too can vibe like you're at your own private concert. Plus, with the 64 color personalized light option. You can set the mood any way you want, be it romantic, chill or in a straight up do not disturb mode. Let the Nissan Murano be your oasis in a chaotic world. Because sometimes the greatest rush isn't rushing at all. Drive the all new Nissan Murano today.

[Tam Bam]

Panoramic moonroof, ambient lighting, bows and massaging leather. Appointed seats are optional features.

[Joe Locke]

Is this a good time? It's me, Dylan Mulvaney and my dear friend Joe Locke from Heartstopper. And Agatha all along is my very first guest on my brand new podcast, the Dylan Hour. It's musical mayhem and it is going to be so much fun.

[Tam Bam]

I like a man.

[Joe Locke]

You like a man. What do I like, Joe?

[Tam Bam]

You like a man too.

[Joe Locke]

We often. There's quite similar. There's some cross pollination happening in here.

[Tam Bam]

Not like. No. Have we? No.

[Joe Locke]

No, not yet. Never say never. I cannot wait for all you girls, gays and they's to join me on this extremely special pink confection of a podcast. There is so much darkness in this world and what I think we could all use more of is a little joy. Listen to the Dylan hour on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to your podcasts. Love ya.

[John Cameron Mitchell]

This is John Cameron Mitchell and my new fiction podcast series, Cancellation island stars Holly Hunter as Karen, a wellness influencer who launches a rehab for the recently cancelled. In the future, we will all be cancelled for 15 minutes, but don't worry, we'll take you from broke to woke or your money back. Cancellation Island's revolutionary rehab therapies like bad touch football, anti racism, spin class and mandatory ayahuasca ceremonies are designed to force the council to confront their worst impulses. But everything starts to fall apart when people start disappearing. Karen, where have you brought us Cancellation island, where a second chance might just be your last. Listen to Cancellation island on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Kevin Smith]

Hey, kids, it's me, Kevin Smith.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

And it's me, Harley Quinn Smith.

[Kevin Smith]

That's my daughter man, who my wife has always said is just beardless dickless version of me. And that's the name of our podcast, Beardless Me. I'm the old one, I'm the young one. And every week we try to make each other laugh really hard. Sounds innocent, doesn't it? A lot of cussing, a lot of bad language. It's for adults only. Or listen to it with your kid. Could be a family show. We're not quite sure. We're still figuring it Out.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

It's a work in progress.

[Kevin Smith]

Listen to Beardless with me on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast.

[Tam Bam]

Yeah, I can't say a bitch.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Get the sweat up there and swaying. Oh, hell no. She mad.

[Tam Bam]

My skin is rice paper, okay? My skin is too thin for that. Who are you talking to? I'm mad as hell.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

First joke out. Say something about my thin edges. I'm about to turn this out.

[Tam Bam]

Like, anybody want to do a joke little session with me? Just call me fat, and you win. You win. I might run out crying. For real. I'm. I'm that sensitive about my weight. You know why you win. I don't even want it.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Somebody just call me fat. You win. I hate you.

[Tam Bam]

You win. All right, so, y'all, this week we're in Atlanta, okay? And we did a collab with one of our label mates, okay? No Ceilings podcast, hosted by Glasses Malone and Peter Rose Gold Bass. Okay, y'all stay tuned. We got Rose Gold Pete and Glasses Malone on. We talk back this week, y'all. What's up?

[AJ Holiday]

And we're in Atlanta, but y'all are good. Like, I. I don't listen to a lot of.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

He's more critical.

[Tam Bam]

It takes a while for me to say shit. So when I say it, I mean it. So it might not be received.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

And we not getting these targets when we talking about every last.

[AJ Holiday]

We had sponsors. We lost all our sponsors. The first show.

[Tam Bam]

Really?

[AJ Holiday]

The first show.

[Tam Bam]

No, I don't think nobody paying attention to what the fuck we talking about on this show, because we still got sponsors.

[AJ Holiday]

So it works out.

[Tam Bam]

Podcasting these sponsors, man, there's a lot of people not really making no type of checks in podcasting, and you need shade.

[AJ Holiday]

You. No, see, that's my problem. I don't have none. Like, I have some in real life. But because I am me publicly out in front of everybody, I don't really have shame to the same capacity. Like, I'm more ashamed. Ashamed of myself, like I was telling aj. Like, I. I'm ashamed that I know better and I don't do better. That's a real shame. But I actually admit that I know better and I don't do better.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Right?

[Tam Bam]

And once you say it out loud, it's no longer something to be ashamed of.

[AJ Holiday]

Well, I'm still gonna be ashamed, right? Because then.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

But that's internal shame.

[Tam Bam]

Yeah, there's internal, and then there's public shame.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Right?

[AJ Holiday]

Oh, other people shaming.

[Tam Bam]

Right? Other people shaming you. So once you say the thing and you know that you can do better. Ah, I can see why you would still be ashamed because like I said, I'd be wanting to get up earlier, but my body won't let me. I like to be awake when everybody else sleep. I think better and I know that about myself. So that's just a level of self awareness. I'm a sleep. I'm gonna make some T shirts that say, I let it lay down. Sleeping is awesome.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I'm like, oh, definitely.

[AJ Holiday]

I didn't think about it.

[Tam Bam]

I like linen, I like bedding.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Every time I say ho. Now I keep thinking about your grandma.

[AJ Holiday]

And I hate it.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

How many episodes we gonna drag this lady, man?

[AJ Holiday]

I don't know why you brought it up.

[Tam Bam]

I can see drag across a black.

[AJ Holiday]

Of color coming up to you. And they'd be like, oh, Pete. Somebody hit me on Twitter, was like, that dog, why would you let Pete talk about his grandmother like that? I'm like, bro, how many times do.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

You hear, why do you let Pete blank. Like, I feel like that's a term, that's a phrase that I have heard come up at least a dozen times.

[AJ Holiday]

It's probably true because people. I have to remind other black people that you're white. I think people hear you talk and like, don't get me wrong, you have a very sophisticated tone. You could tell you know your shit, but you have a little soul. So people think maybe you're light skinned.

[Tam Bam]

I'm like, no, cuz that's Tommy off power, isn't it? Yeah.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Like, for real.

[AJ Holiday]

It does, bro. So it's like, it's intellectual Tommy. And he's going to tell you how.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

They used to call me that at the strip club. It's crazy as stars.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

There was like half a dozen of them. Girls used to always call me Tommy. And I had never seen the show. I didn't know what the fuck they were talking about for years, like three years.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I finally go like, my name is.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I'm like, no one else comes in here looks like me. They're like, it's not a guy who comes in here.

[Tam Bam]

Where you getting the strippers though?

[AJ Holiday]

But mind you, the strip club he's talking about, only black people go to the strip. This is in G. So if y'all been to la, like, so there's a couple black suburbs, right? Carson is a black suburb. Gardena is a black suburb.

[Tam Bam]

Oh, black people live there. I never knew.

[AJ Holiday]

Yes, there's pe. The strip club he's talking about is in the black suburb Garden.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

And that's your spot.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Oh, they closed it down. But that was everybody. It's not my spot. It was everybody's spot, man.

[AJ Holiday]

But he would be one of the only few people that look like him there. It's gonna be very few people that look like Pete that ever go there.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

That might also be true, Tommy.

[AJ Holiday]

That's why they called you Tommy. Because think about it. If you from where we from, like, you don't see that many white people. It's either postman, the mailman, the police, somebody serving the subpoena, and then Pete White. And Pete.

[Tam Bam]

Yeah, shame for real.

[AJ Holiday]

And Pete has none. That's what make no silliness. Great. That's the one thing I have.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

No shame. But my life is defined by just an absolute. Just deluge of personal shame.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yeah. You have personal shame?

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Of course. And public shame. Absolutely. Yeah.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yeah, we all do.

[Tam Bam]

So y'all know I like definitions. Okay, let's read the definition of shame. Okay, so shame is a painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by the consciousness of wrong or foolish behavior. She was hot with shame.

[AJ Holiday]

Yeah, I like that. Okay, read it one more time.

[Tam Bam]

A painful feeling of humiliation. So then if you're humiliated, that would have to be public shame. Sure. Because things that you do in private, you wouldn't necessarily be. Be humiliated.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

That's not true. Because after I finished math, I was.

[Tam Bam]

Just thinking that as I was saying that I'm like, disgusting. I'm so shameful. As soon as I come, I'm like, I'm disgusting.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

It's shame.

[Tam Bam]

They go hand in hand. I'm happy.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I'm not disappointed.

[AJ Holiday]

Is there pain? Is there humiliated?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

You look at yourself in the mirror, you feel great. But I'm like, you're disappointed.

[AJ Holiday]

You look at yourself in the mirror, you be like, you nasty girl.

[Tam Bam]

Nasty. Cut that off. It's for real. As soon as you come, you come to your senses, like, pushing shit away.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Push your laptop away.

[Tam Bam]

Now I gotta hide my vibrator.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Go to the girl's place and have her to my place.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Why?

[AJ Holiday]

Because you don't gotta get in.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

It's easier to get yourself out of somewhere than get someone else out of your place.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Oh, this is true. Absolutely.

[Tam Bam]

You could just say, what you doing tomorrow? What you about to do?

[AJ Holiday]

I just go to line. Yeah, that used to be my prime. Go to line. What you about to do? I feel so bad.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

That is so mean.

[Tam Bam]

But you know what?

[AJ Holiday]

I changed as I got older. Like, right when I finally hit my 30s, I start realizing, like, did I really want to sleep with the Girl. So personally, I used to just like, get in the shower, right? I would rub one out and then if I still wanted to call her, then I would call her. That pretty much fixed 95 of the problem.

[Tam Bam]

Yeah, absolutely. That's why I always. I always had this campaign when vibrators were ran by batteries. Now, you can charge them up with the cell phone, but them triple double A batteries save your life. Like, once you just get one out right quick, you ain't about to do no dumb bitch. Like, you're not calling him over.

[AJ Holiday]

You stop exchanging with people. That's not worthy.

[Tam Bam]

Exactly.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Just like your laptop.

[Tam Bam]

Yeah. You just tripping. Like, the chemical imbalance is up right now.

[AJ Holiday]

There's something bad about it. Might not be to be like, well, it ain't that bad. And then you rub one even, oh, this motherfucker's the scum of the earth. I can't believe I let this motherfucker.

[Tam Bam]

I feel shame fucking with him.

[AJ Holiday]

But that. But no, if you really think about it now, back to that point with Diddy, like, so when they talk about cuz parties, like, that's really. Now I've been to Diddy's party. I've never seen drugs. But I don't know if I'm probably the person. He probably wouldn't be like, let me get glasses in the room where the drugs is.

[Tam Bam]

Right.

[AJ Holiday]

But I'm saying, think about every time we talk about these type of situations, somewhere along the whole premise is drugs.

[Tam Bam]

Yeah. Because they don't call alcohol, for one, spirits for no reason.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Right.

[Tam Bam]

So if you're leaving your body open and people want it, but people want to get into that frequency. That's why they do the drugs. So is it the drugs or does the shame come before or after?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Like, because I think allows you to be free and who you already are. I feel like.

[Tam Bam]

Exactly. So that is already an element of who you are once you take the drug. You don't give a who knows anymore. Or you just trying to limit it to the little bit of people you let in that room.

[AJ Holiday]

So are you the person you are when you hide or are you the person?

[Tam Bam]

I'm the same person every day online, offline, on drugs. Aqua.

[AJ Holiday]

I could already say we kindred spirit.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

But I'm different when I'm high. Cause I be freestyling when I get high.

[AJ Holiday]

Yeah.

[Tam Bam]

Rapper.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yeah. I turn into a rapper. Instrumentals, give them to me. But when I'm not high, I don't want to do that.

[AJ Holiday]

I ain't got no bars. I know for Real. I thought we was Kendrick spirit. I could tell that. Like, straightforward. And it's like. It's honest. It ain't about like one upping people, but I think that's because I walk out every day as myself.

[Tam Bam]

Exactly. And I think in this world now, it's like not cool to be yourself. And I mean, when I say be.

[AJ Holiday]

It's no social currency in being yourself.

[Tam Bam]

Yes, there's none.

[AJ Holiday]

There's no social currency.

[Tam Bam]

People have a problem with you being yourself. So that's why. Why I feel like. So shame is necessary and then it's not necessary at the same time. Like, I don't want to publicly shame people for however it is that they present.

[AJ Holiday]

See, I'll be shaming the shit out of them.

[Tam Bam]

I ain't gonna lie. I can be very judgmental, but I.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Don'T wanna see the difference.

[Tam Bam]

I don't. I feel shame publicly shaming somebody. Like when I see people comments like, bitch, did you brush your teeth before you're publicly trying to shame this person? Like, your comment makes you look crazier than the person you're commenting on. You see what I'm saying?

[AJ Holiday]

But social media gave everybody in their mind a voice. Really, they had a voice.

[Tam Bam]

And some people should shut the fuck up.

[AJ Holiday]

Well, the difference in social media is when you have a voice. Like in real life, if you say the wrong thing to somebody, it comes with like, my man Pete, favorite word, consequence.

[Tam Bam]

Right?

[AJ Holiday]

Social media doesn't come with any consequence. You can see people get mad when social media starts to come with consequence. They start getting upset. They already cut. They banned my account. It's like, bro, you can't just say anything. Might come with consequences.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

And it's an inverse power hierarchy. The more powerful you are on social media, the more vulnerable you are because you have a million followers and a big footprint and a lot to lose. Then 500 nobodies who do nothing and don't matter in any way, shape or form. They'll be what brings you down. But you can't bring them down in the same way because they're irrelevant. They don't exist.

[Tam Bam]

And the more power you have, the less shame you have. I think also you do more of the shit you want to do and you don't give a fuck.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Maybe in private, right, Privately, but publicly.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

You probably got in the social media space.

[Tam Bam]

We've talked about Sexy Red.

[AJ Holiday]

I've argued. I've argued with people, but it's different when you villain. Like, that's how I feel like, right? Being a allows me to Be the villain. So like I'll say what the. I want to say if expected from you. Yeah. That's why I say if. If like I look at I saw Jeezy art on that's crazy. I saw Jeezy on social media defending himself cuz they said he slapped his wife. And I'm thinking to myself, why the would you defend you, Young Jeezy? If you slapped your wife, Ain't nobody going to say nothing. Like you knew this was some.

[Tam Bam]

Yeah, but he actually put in a caption. Y'all know me. Me actually we don't. I didn't expect him.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Don't say nothing to him.

[Tam Bam]

I didn't expect him to marry an Asian woman.

[AJ Holiday]

Is that so? Now if you slapped him, I'm not surprised. It's Young Jeezy, that crazy girl. Don't say nothing to him.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

That's a lyric.

[Tam Bam]

I don't see Jeezy as he likes. I see Jeezy like to smoke.

[AJ Holiday]

That's a character mixed arm and Hammond with his coat.

[Tam Bam]

We know the rappers being character.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Hell no.

[AJ Holiday]

I'm a Crip, for real. I'm not a character.

[Tam Bam]

You think Jeezy is really about that life? For real?

[AJ Holiday]

I should.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I do.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

That's not the question.

[Tam Bam]

Do you think he's about that life? And especially once you get to a certain level, like you ain't about to crash out because expect me to crash out.

[AJ Holiday]

Slappy old lady is crashing out of you, Young Jeezy.

[Tam Bam]

I mean in relationship shifts happen. I might have to reset your ass one day, you know, like.

[AJ Holiday]

Like what if she was like ass nigga and he slapped her? If you can't understand, like who the would. I can't live in this world.

[Tam Bam]

There's nuance.

[AJ Holiday]

One set of rules. Now if you slap this woman cause your coffee was cold. You are a savage. You are a horrible human being. You missed her from Color Purple, right? But if she said something. What if she call you a nigger.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

With the hard er.

[AJ Holiday]

Yeah, fucking nigger.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I knew I shouldn't have fucked with you.

[AJ Holiday]

Nigger.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yeah. Then it's a problem.

[Tam Bam]

I don't think she was saying it's not about him. I don't think that he did that to her. Because she's not the one who filed for a divorce. All it is now is coming up because he's trying to leave your ass and you are publicly shamed because bitch, I never been left. So now you getting left by a man publicly with a baby. So she's pulling all type of shit out her ass at this point, as far as I'm concerned, I don't think.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

You wanted this black culture baby. You got it.

[Tam Bam]

Have a baby by me. Be a single parent.

[AJ Holiday]

Like you're young Jeezy, bro, you used to sell drugs all the time, right? Your biggest fear should not be you slapped your ex wife. Like, oh, he's abusive. It's young Jeez. You know what you getting if you come for girls be pleasantly surprised when they interact with me because they already had me figured out. They think I'm finna fire them up. When I come to them to. To discuss a problem, they'd be like, well, they don't even know how to answer it because they expect me automatically to kick their ass. And I'm like trying to explain to you what's wrong.

[Tam Bam]

I don't never expect anybody to put their hand because you. If you see me with that bag of any sort, you better not put your hands on me.

[AJ Holiday]

I'm saying people expect that of me. So then when I don't feel like.

[Tam Bam]

That, your energy does not say you be smacking dog.

[AJ Holiday]

Not at all. But that's not what people think of crips.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Oh, oh yeah, that, that.

[AJ Holiday]

And people know that I'm genuinely a. So they like, this is expected. So when I come to them with amicable resolutions, they be disappointed.

[Tam Bam]

So you think you'd be attracting women that wanted to smack that are used to it.

[AJ Holiday]

Guaranteed.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yo, he don't love me if he didn't hit me. That kind of girl.

[AJ Holiday]

Yeah, because they don't. That's how most men on drugs communicate. All my homies had to fight them, smoke weed, smoke sherm, blah, blah, and then somebody else. You can't communicate effectively. You know what I'm saying? This is why people doing that. So then they communicate the way they communicate, which I'm. I honor they request because, you know, I'm such a. So you slapping gentlemen? No, not. I'm saying I will fight my friends.

[Tam Bam]

Oh, okay, enough.

[AJ Holiday]

A girl telling me to slap her, like, that's just weird.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

What about sexually?

[AJ Holiday]

That's weird. That's weird. Like, you know, slap you on your ass is one thing, but I met girls who wanted me to slap them in the face or choke them. And I'm like, look at my hands, man. If I choke you with just enough.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Food, what's just enough when you're choking.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

That I don't die right at the.

[Tam Bam]

Edge of death, right?

[AJ Holiday]

No. So, yeah, like, but that's back to that same thing I was saying for.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Which One of us.

[AJ Holiday]

There is something.

[Tam Bam]

I remember that you said last week.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Came and she went, that's too much.

[Tam Bam]

Stupid.

[AJ Holiday]

No. So. So Jeezy. I feel like Jeezy is dealing with that wrong. But that's also because he's catering to a different audience. And that brought shame to that audience for him. Like, people was like, oh, you was abusing. It don't matter. They gonna already call you an abuser, my nigga. They used to call you a drug dealer. You prided yourself in that.

[Tam Bam]

I just. I have a problem with her if she's. You can't just say shit like that about a black man. That shit ain't cool.

[AJ Holiday]

Facts, especially.

[Tam Bam]

And this is why you need to steer your ass in the house.

[AJ Holiday]

That's why. Stay away from black.

[Tam Bam]

Stay your ass.

[AJ Holiday]

Stay away from other women.

[Tam Bam]

But black women not even, like, just have more discernment. You know what I'm saying? I feel like. Like I'm the type of person, I want to knock all this shit over with my forearm and start anew. I don't want proximity to close to certain people. You know what I'm saying? There's some people who really want change, and there's some people who just want proximity to bullshit. Like, there's some niggas lined up to be diddy. They really.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

What do you mean by that?

[Tam Bam]

They are willing to do the things that Diddy did to get a billion dollars. They are willing to do that. They already know who they gonna kill in a family. All type of shit. I feel like this is what I feel like. They already know who they gonna sacrifice around the block. They already know who they're willing to sacrifice for the check.

[AJ Holiday]

I'm sure. I mean, let's be. Diddy is actually. God damn it. We talk about.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Listen, we gotta get back to Shane. Let's get away from Diddy. Let's get back to the shame, you guys.

[AJ Holiday]

But I'm saying. But it's all. It's all incumbent. It's all the same, right? So.

[Tam Bam]

Because y'all disagree with what I just said, should I feel shame? Cuz I don't. I meant to what I said.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Like, it's gonna just supplant the word shame in the English dialect.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I mean, I felt so diddy about myself.

[AJ Holiday]

Crazy. This is what we doing.

[Tam Bam]

Turning publicly, publicly shame. Gucci Mane right now for his new song. And he used like, the. The Biggie and. And Diddy little. Remember they were in the bathtub with the bubbly and all the women around. Yeah, like, that's his album covers, him and Keisha Kyor and a couple other in the. In the. In the image. Yeah. So now they're probably publicly trying to shame Gucci for using that imagery because of what Diddy is now going through.

[AJ Holiday]

But Diddy is not going through anything.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

He look like he looking a little.

[AJ Holiday]

Slim, but that's because.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Going through some.

[AJ Holiday]

That's because he's having an issue because he was the hero. See, that's the thing. Like, if he was the hero, I always tell C the same thing. Charlamagne, don't become the hero. Be the anti hero. At best, be the anti. Like, be the villain. Black people in America, Puff was the hero the whole time. He was the shining white knight for white people the whole time.

[Tam Bam]

Oh, I see what you're saying.

[AJ Holiday]

You know what I mean? Like, he was Suge or Diddy. Suge fucking looked like Satan to the white fol. They was like, oh, he making us pay them the money that we owe them. He's the evil man.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

He did the Sting song.

[AJ Holiday]

Yeah, that is hero. That screams hero.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

But it wasn't. I didn't like.

[Tam Bam]

So you mean palatable? No, the delectable palatable Negro.

[AJ Holiday]

Listen, no black person is really hero. It's America. Come on. Yeah, O.J.

[Tam Bam]

He'S safe, though. He was safe for them.

[AJ Holiday]

O.J. puff, you know what I'm saying? They, like, look at the alternatives.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

OJ Was not a hero in American.

[Tam Bam]

I think so, man.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

In black America's eyes, but not in America.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

O.J.

[AJ Holiday]

You young. You are young.

[Tam Bam]

Yes.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

No, no, I'm very grown.

[AJ Holiday]

No, you young.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

You think O.J. was a hero.

[AJ Holiday]

O.J. was an American white hero.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Okay? Prior. Not for black people, 394.

[Tam Bam]

But what is for black people? You know, people be so mad because trying to shame him for saying that he's not black is subjective.

[AJ Holiday]

No, no, it's not.

[Tam Bam]

Yes, it is.

[AJ Holiday]

That's a fact. He's black.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

They, like, pull over. Get your black ass out the car.

[AJ Holiday]

Exactly. He's not talking to me.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

He's talking to y'all.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Y'all.

[AJ Holiday]

So it's Jim Brown or O.J.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

The way O.J. s arrest went, he proved that he was not black. Yeah, they followed him at about 13 miles per hour driving about 80 miles. He came in. They didn't arrest him. He walked in, he poured himself a glass of orange juice and said, you need any more time?

[AJ Holiday]

And talk to his mother.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

All right, we're gonna have to ask you to come here, make a couple.

[AJ Holiday]

Calls, talk to your mom.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I that was wild. I was like, wait, after all that.

[Tam Bam]

They let him walk inside of Poor Orange Juice? It wasn't.

[AJ Holiday]

Even a chase.

[Tam Bam]

Driving Miss Daisy.

[AJ Holiday]

It wasn't even a chase.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Flagrant stall.

[AJ Holiday]

It was an escort to his mansion.

[Tam Bam]

Exactly. They was escorting him.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

They were just. The police just happened to have somehow fucked around and got behind the car.

[Tam Bam]

O.J. innocent. If the glove don't fit.

[AJ Holiday]

Yep.

[Tam Bam]

You must have quit.

[AJ Holiday]

So. So I'm saying, right, you had Suge Knight, Puff. That was the pantheon of blackness when it came to white eyes, Jim Brown, O.J. simpson. So it's like, you know. Yeah. Like, they chose him. They chose Puff. He was the hero. So all the stuff that we heard about, they didn't hear about it. Now, some of them white folks knew about it, but we heard about Puff. All black people coming up in our era, the 90s, we heard about the he was doing. Oh, we heard about Puff. Puff parties is crazy. Puff, they got the. They got the pink cocaine, they got all the drugs. You go to Puff Party, all the girls give you some head, and it's popping. We heard white people didn't hear that. Only the white people that went to the parties that knew it. But the average white kid thought of Puff as the hero or OJ As a hero. That's why they be so disappointed in these moments. And then that shame sets in. Gots to be more careful when that shame sets in.

[Tam Bam]

I'm not. I don't have shame. So this I have.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

You don't have any shame.

[Tam Bam]

I do. Okay, so shame is when nobody. Shame is when people know about your little things that you do. That's when the shame comes in. I do. I have, like, personal shame. Not for real. It'll be some, like, what Glasses said, like, bitch, you know, to get up and go to the gym and do all the things.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Do you have anything that you've ever done that you know? If people knew, you might feel shame.

[Tam Bam]

But once I say it out loud, some girls, it's no longer like, yeah.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Like some girls that you knock down.

[AJ Holiday]

Like, some girls, as you said, it's things that you do. Some girls, yeah. If everybody knew I slept with her.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I'd be, yeah, you have shame. So that's not.

[Tam Bam]

I talked about my crackhead first on an episode. Like, he's a crackhead now. I feel shame.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

But he wasn't a crackhead when he did it, when you dated him.

[Tam Bam]

But he had no business even then. Like, he might have been a crackhead. Yeah.

[AJ Holiday]

Like he could have thought positive.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yes.

[Tam Bam]

And Then when I was a teenager, I got pregnant for this guy. I am ashamed. That is one thing I am ashamed of. I would never, like, show somebody this person that I lit sweat on me one time in life, dog. Yeah, I'm like 35 years old at a time now. I'm in front of my mom's house, coming from out of town. I hadn't seen this person since I was a teenager. And somebody down the street like, ashley, come here. What the fuck is called? I'm like, you're in a car. You come here. This car reverses and this thing gets out the fucking car, dog. And he like walking and pulling his pants up, still like a teenager, like, eh, what's up, baby mama?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Let me hold $40.

[Tam Bam]

My heart dropped. Let me get what you. What you got going? I gotta get your phone now. I'm like, no, I have a family plan now. I'm talking real bougie to him, like, nigga, you don't know me, okay?

[AJ Holiday]

He think it is by like, yeah, I had that.

[Tam Bam]

You don't got no kids? No, I don't have any kids. You got kids? No. Lying because my. My sister told me she saw you in county jail, like for child support, but just looking like thing or it. See, at 11, I let him hit that body.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

At 11 hours, 59 minutes and 59 seconds on new Year's Eve, all my bodies get erased for the year.

[Tam Bam]

Unless that died, he's still there. So now that's a factory reset. That's why you gotta have that M4H money, man, you gotta get these out here, cuz. You know, at some point we might get like, you know, super, super duper stars. It is going to be somebody that comes out the woodwork that will. I hit that.

[AJ Holiday]

And that's how we really do it, though. I ain't gonna lie. That's how we really do it.

[Tam Bam]

Don't even remember. They wait until they see you with your.

[AJ Holiday]

Were you popping? Yeah, you sure was something like, yeah, that was me. That's. That's why, like, when you date a girl, you feel me like you, she don't realize everything she did in the past you inherit. Because if it's the wrong type of dude, he gonna let, especially if it's a nigga, that ain't nothing on your status. Like, one thing I've always tried to do is never be an embarrassment for a woman. Like, if she says she fuck with me, it's always, I don't give a fuck if she came and fuck with Warren Buffett. After, she gonna be like, yeah, that glasses. You feel me? Like, I'm gonna be the best version of me. But, man, when you get that kind of girl and you look at the kind of guy she slept with, and you like, you was fucking him.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yeah, we feel the same way, though.

[Tam Bam]

Yes. That's why I like to see people, exes. I like to know, like, the type of women you like. I don't like men who got a bunch of different types. I like somebody who has, like, preference. You know what I'm saying?

[AJ Holiday]

I got nurses, Oscar winners.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

But that's a profession.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Is it?

[Tam Bam]

Like, I'm talking, like, aesthetic. Like, look.

[AJ Holiday]

No, literally, I. I have made it my business to explore the pantheon of women beauty. I'm talking about as short as 52 or 5 1, to as tall as 6 foot 3.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

But do you have a preference within.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Right. Like, is it like, she's intellectual.

[Tam Bam]

It don't matter. That's scary to me.

[AJ Holiday]

When you don't care when you young, right? You don't. Because really, you looking for one thing specifically. When you first meet somebody, right? Then as you get older, that one thing obviously stopped being the most important thing. And then everything else start mattering. But so for a long time, you know, you coming into, you know, I'm hustling you selling drugs and shit. You hustling you girls is, you know, you kind of getting your choice and you, you know, getting the music business. Some things work out for you. You around? I'm around. Lil Wayne. The quarter three is out. I'm picking. You know what I'm saying? We up.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

So it's just like, who did.

[AJ Holiday]

I want to sleep? Because that's really. What else do I want them to do? Like, you know, I mean, you. Who do I want to sleep with? So at that point, I don't have a type. Like, it'll just look crazy.

[Tam Bam]

And that's what I'm saying.

[AJ Holiday]

I'm talking about light as the clouds.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

And dark is the night as well.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I have more of a type. But there's like, there's spectrum to that, you know, so it. And, like, I get what he's saying, what he's not saying. So, like, at this point in time, your type is a certain type of personality compatibility. You can't necessarily call that from across the street.

[Tam Bam]

Right.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

So it's more on the soft value. It's. He actually values more of what women say they wish men valued.

[AJ Holiday]

That's true.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Not all women, but I'm just kidding. So, I mean, yeah, it depends.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Like, so there's still a type. It's just not an aesthetic.

[AJ Holiday]

It's like, I don't really. I didn't have a type like forever.

[Tam Bam]

Like you have a type now.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

You have a personality profile.

[Tam Bam]

Because I feel like there's only. There's only, like, I want to say like five different profiles or five different characteristics. And you could find that. Find that same characteristic and multiple people tell us. So people aren't like you on your show. People aren't really that unique. So what is that thing that, that those five things that you look for, that it has to be something that attracts you to these different people?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Any mini minimum.

[AJ Holiday]

Well, okay.

[Tam Bam]

You want anybody juice on you?

[AJ Holiday]

Like, I didn't think of it like that at that time. I didn't have. We don't value ourselves, you know, we can't make a baby.

[Tam Bam]

I always say men, men just.

[AJ Holiday]

Y'all should value yourself because y'all can like, you like God, you can make a child. You bring a child into the universe. That's crazy. So how y'all give pussy away is absolutely absurd. Like, you literally can carrying on a nigga's lineage, like, that's the decision you making with this shit is ain't shit.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

We're like Magellan. We're just trying to make it all the way around the world first.

[Tam Bam]

Wait, so do men have less shame?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Of course. Oh, absolutely. Absolutely.

[AJ Holiday]

Of course.

[Tam Bam]

Why do y'all get to be shameless? Why do y'all get to be scum of the earth and still accepted by women and everybody else?

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Shame for consequences.

[AJ Holiday]

Yeah, that's exactly what it is. Exactly. That's exactly what it is. Listen, I remember growing up thinking, because, like a girl with a big ass booty was something, right? And then you get your world rock by a skinny ass piece of plywood. You can't judge this. You got to just go with the flow and see who fuck with you. See how y'all interact and then you build from there. That's it.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

So that's how you pick your person now. Like, it's just like.

[AJ Holiday]

Well, it depends. Like, right?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Do we sit next to me? Let's talk? Is that how.

[AJ Holiday]

No, Like, I don't really. I don't really even. Even at all time. I don't really entertain that way. I'm not really looking. I haven't looked in 12 years. I don't look like. We'll just interact and then if they interact has, like, if something there's. And we, you know, we'll see where it goes. Then I'm not. I've been so past just finding something, like, to sleep with, like, now. It's just. Do we interact or not? Then we'll see where it go.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

That's fair.

[Tam Bam]

You sound like an adult. Yeah, Grown ass. Like, what?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

For real? Because before, it was just about sex, is what you're saying.

[Tam Bam]

Do women really want men who are emotionally intelligent?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I do.

[Tam Bam]

I don't think a lot of. I don't think a lot of women are even ready for that.

[AJ Holiday]

Dog, you do not want no coming to you about his feelings all the time.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I do.

[AJ Holiday]

No, you don't. You just think that you're gonna be.

[Tam Bam]

Like, who was that? K. Michelle was saying?

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Do you. Do you want a guy who comes to you with his feelings all the time or whatever because it's an alibi for your emotional instability instead of being.

[Tam Bam]

God damn it.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Wait a minute, wait a minute.

[AJ Holiday]

Here's your thought. Just a thought.

[Tam Bam]

Yo.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

No, I just want him to feel like it's a safe space to share his feelings with me.

[AJ Holiday]

You don't think that's personally empowering for you? To make you feel like you have more say and control?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I'm not trying to control him. I just want to share.

[Tam Bam]

Share.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

This is my partner. I want him to feel like he can say anything to me, especially how he's feeling, because black men especially don't get an outlet for their feelings, especially with other black men. Where are you taking your feelings? You know, take it to me. I'm your safe.

[Tam Bam]

No, I'm not your therapist.

[AJ Holiday]

Exactly.

[Tam Bam]

You see, that's it.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

And I'm not saying I want to be.

[AJ Holiday]

That's the problem.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Why?

[AJ Holiday]

Because if you start. If he starts telling you what's wrong with him, you're a therapist. And if you start fixing them or.

[Tam Bam]

Trying or trying to find.

[AJ Holiday]

You heard what Shaq said.

[Tam Bam]

What?

[AJ Holiday]

He said, don't tell a woman you're feeling because she gonna bring it up.

[Tam Bam]

No, that's mean people. And I. That's what Tammy's getting at. I've. I hate when. And I say this a lot because, I mean, it's mean. People use your vulnerabilities against you. It's not something that's exclusive to women. Because I have never, ever, ever, ever been with a man who did not call me a bald head, fat bitch when we got in an argument.

[AJ Holiday]

I'm gonna say the closest thing that I'm thinking, but not some woman.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Shit.

[Tam Bam]

I don't say the worst shit to win an argument because I want you to love me later. You Know what I'm saying? Like, when I say the worst dog, I mean that dog.

[AJ Holiday]

I don't really know. Boom.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Right in the gut when I'm mad.

[Tam Bam]

See.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I'm working on it.

[AJ Holiday]

This is why you don't tell her. No, this is why you don't tell you.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Because you Wait, no, listen, I used to be that way. I'm working on it now where I won't say the worst thing, but I did.

[Tam Bam]

Your woman cannot be a therapist, dog. We not like, everybody is not. I feel like I could be a therapist. Right. I give a lot of good advice and I may not always take my own. Right. But men should not get into the habit of unpacking all this onto a woman and then wanting her to use those things that he's told her to justify bad behavior.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Okay, that's fair.

[Tam Bam]

That the gets to be kind of up sometimes. Like, oh, you had a bad relationship with your mom. You know, she was a. Right. A lot of men are sons of. In a real way.

[AJ Holiday]

I had a slut grandma make that profanity. You get it.

[Tam Bam]

Okay. And you don't want to end up with somebody like that.

[AJ Holiday]

No, not at all.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I keep talking about that because that is the craziest ever.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I don't get affected by single incident matters.

[AJ Holiday]

What about double is like great grandma and grandma.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I, I, my brain's only, like, if I have like a large enough sample size that would be like for, you know, state presidential polling, you know, in a small state, like, they'll, they'll, they'll, they'll determine that Biden's trailing Trump by 500 people.

[AJ Holiday]

So you're working off 12 month replays. I'm only 12 months.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I'm just going like, if I can observe enough data in the aggregate to go, okay, that's happening. That's my critical mass point.

[AJ Holiday]

Okay.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I don't take anything that just happens personally.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

What's the point in having a partner if they can't come to you with their feelings?

[Tam Bam]

What is the point? But I can't always, I can't offer.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

What is the point?

[Tam Bam]

What is the point?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

If I, if my partner is feeling all these things and he's holding it in because he feels like I'm gonna use it against him later, or he just feels like it's quite a safe space.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

What are you gonna do about it?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

What am I gonna do about what? Him not coming to me with my feelings.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

No. So he's got all these issues. He coach tells you about you. What are you gonna do about it?

[AJ Holiday]

What are you like, babe, you're just.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Gonna be like, all right, you're a little weaker than I thought you were.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I don't know. Maybe I could just be nurturing to him in that moment.

[Tam Bam]

If that's what he now use.

[AJ Holiday]

Mama, who needs nurturing, which is really what you supposed to.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Black men need nurturing. You don't feel that?

[AJ Holiday]

That's the truth.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yeah. So.

[AJ Holiday]

So you want to be somebody, Mama, then that's really what love is.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I want to be. I don't want to be his mom, but I want to be a safe space, feel comforted in love.

[Tam Bam]

I don't like it, though, because I be feeling like. Because dog and I do love, and I. I have a love that is unconditional for him. This is somebody I'm back with now after many years. Right. And I do have.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Not the same guy from the car story earlier. No, I just.

[Tam Bam]

But I don't. Why are you bringing up. Oh, shit. I don't feel like he has unconditional love for me, though, because through. Through conversation, like, through conversing. And now I'll say like, well, what if I did what you did? Oh, no, I'm gonna up out of here. You don't have unconditional love for me.

[AJ Holiday]

It's different. It's not.

[Tam Bam]

How. When do women get unconditional love? When do I get the grace than women's love is?

[AJ Holiday]

Yeah.

[Tam Bam]

How?

[AJ Holiday]

Because you don't have to do anything.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Women. Men are producers. Women are consumers.

[AJ Holiday]

Yeah, you don't have to do anything.

[Tam Bam]

I feel like men consume us. They eat us alive. You have to give a man your soul to prove to him that you are the one. Men are predators. Men are the consumers. Y'all suck the energy and life out of women. That's why single and live longer. Right.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Leave them with babies.

[AJ Holiday]

Really?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Y'all don't take. When y'all leave. Y'all don't take the babies with y'all.

[Tam Bam]

Y'all don't got no shame. Y'all just be around here doing for that.

[AJ Holiday]

Because it's. Men have families. Women have children.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

And who makes families? It comes out of you first.

[AJ Holiday]

No, I'm saying we have families. You guys have children.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

What the does that mean?

[Tam Bam]

I just saw an African man.

[AJ Holiday]

She just said.

[Tam Bam]

He said he got six baby mamas. He said three. No, excuse me. He has six kids. Three women and two of them. Two of them. Something like. However, he was telling how many. This one has two kids, so she should be good. She shouldn't stress this one has one kid. You know, she shouldn't stress that much. This is. And he's like making it okay that he has now spread himself this thin between different households and will create a way to justify bullshit is what really that is. Men have families and women have children.

[AJ Holiday]

True. We don't. We can't have children.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

What you mean you can't have children.

[AJ Holiday]

Once you're actually can't have children.

[Tam Bam]

No, y'all. No, y'all can't.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

You can't.

[Tam Bam]

You can't.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

You can't bear a child from your body.

[AJ Holiday]

So then therefore we can't have children.

[Tam Bam]

You'll be pushing the girl.

[AJ Holiday]

You can give us.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Like that's just semantics that you're talking about.

[AJ Holiday]

It's actually the fact.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

What do you mean you have.

[Tam Bam]

What are they working on? A lot of missing women. And they probably missing their uterus at the same time.

[AJ Holiday]

We can't have children.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

You can't physically have.

[AJ Holiday]

Yeah, you have children.

[Tam Bam]

Birth children.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

But you can have children.

[AJ Holiday]

No, no. They can be my child. It could be my seed. It could be my.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

You have children and then we got kids. If you made one with me.

[AJ Holiday]

That's the goal then. Now we have a family.

[Tam Bam]

Dog. They really.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

This is just words at that point. It's not.

[AJ Holiday]

Words are important.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Words are different.

[AJ Holiday]

So that's why you have to be that much more serious about the decisions you make. The words right. We cannot have children.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yes, we can.

[AJ Holiday]

No, you can have a children. We can have a family. That child can be my family. You. We can be a family. That's why she just said it a second ago. Like me.

[Tam Bam]

You could. If we had kids, me and you could never be family. You are related to them Churns. So when the fuck you leave, take them with you.

[AJ Holiday]

But we are a family, though, at that point.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

How leave.

[Tam Bam]

Not really.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Before the child shows up. You can't.

[AJ Holiday]

Exactly.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yeah, that's true.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

You know what I'm saying?

[AJ Holiday]

So that's why the power. You.

[Tam Bam]

You and your package delivered ups FedExing your daddy house.

[AJ Holiday]

If you can find him.

[Tam Bam]

Mama guess what he could find.

[AJ Holiday]

Guess what? The baby gonna find your ass.

[Tam Bam]

I'm sick of this call.

[AJ Holiday]

Come grind out that man. The lady go. Come hand that right to you. But are you saying don't hand it to me.

[Tam Bam]

Do you think that's okay though?

[AJ Holiday]

It's nature. It's not about what we like to have or to create a false sense of balance because it ain't really real.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Right.

[AJ Holiday]

It's.

[Tam Bam]

You think women should just be with the children and men shouldn't be around.

[AJ Holiday]

No, no. I think that you should really decide who the you have a child for. I think you gotta stop acting like we can do the exact same thing and find some shame in who you're giving to because this is a serious decision on your. It's not as serious for me.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I leave my.

[Tam Bam]

But it should be though. It should be as serious for men who they give them bought their bodies to you leaving your body open to all type of you. Trying to figure out why you're not as successful as you think you should be is because of the lousy bitches that you allowing to have access to you. Not you in particular. I'm just talking about men, period.

[AJ Holiday]

I'm not disrespecting.

[Tam Bam]

You want some inspiration? Go to the fucking strip club Rose Gold and those bitches is in there getting money tomorrow. All of a sudden your money multiplied. Cause you got this energy of the hoes.

[AJ Holiday]

I totally understand. But I'm saying.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I'm saying the problem is how the glasses be talking.

[AJ Holiday]

No ending with that.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Go to the strip club. You're gonna be richer tomorrow because the hoes got money.

[Tam Bam]

The hoes got the hustling frequency, the hustle spirit.

[AJ Holiday]

No.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Dozens of strippers as I've known personally they'd be broken. I've never met one that didn't make a 7 or 800 a night. And I never met one that had any money.

[Tam Bam]

Yep, these in Atlanta got that bag. Okay.

[AJ Holiday]

And they be broke as a.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

They got money.

[AJ Holiday]

They still got to depend on somebody. Still some they waiting I think because.

[Tam Bam]

Sometimes they be getting pimped, you know, somebody else managing their coochie.

[AJ Holiday]

Listen, the truth is, you guys body is worth much more than our body in the grand scale of having children. Which is the ultimate purpose of sex and the greatest, you know, reward of it all. Your. Your legacy being carried on your DNA spreading. So if. If we make the same decisions based off of the fact that we have equal plan. We're not equal doing this.

[Tam Bam]

I agree. And you know, when you were on our show before, like we. I look at comments and stuff and oh, don't have him back on. I don't like. You know why? Because women don't like being shamed. We don't like being told what to do or accountability. I don't want to say account.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Every time I hear that word, it hurts.

[Tam Bam]

But it should though, because we don't like being reprimanded. We think we are above reproach. And I tell Tammy this all the time we leave relationships, right? Without seeing the part we played in the. I feel like especially a marriage, it's not winning, like, you know what I'm saying? Divorce is like, you lost. Y'all lost something when you get a divorce.

[AJ Holiday]

I am the greatest advocate of women, especially black women today in the podcast space. As a man, right? I remember I did Mandy in them show, right? And the women was mad cause I told them, hey, you should have hold pussy till you get married. That made me the villain of the show.

[Tam Bam]

And that's whack to me, right, Because.

[AJ Holiday]

And it's like everybody else is catering to your sense of, you know, again, you already don't have no consequence the concept until you have a child. See, they not saying that. And this is where Pete will agree, right? Once you have a kid, all your consequences come boom. You won't have none till that point. So again, us making a child, it might take me five seconds. Like, we could lay down in five seconds. I did my part. Nigga is 10 months for you. And I don't gotta do one thing. And you should make decisions knowing that that's the truth.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Absolutely.

[AJ Holiday]

So I agree with you.

[Tam Bam]

So the women not gonna feel me.

[AJ Holiday]

I feel em, you know what I'm saying? But I'm telling you something that no nigga gonna tell you. Like, you probably should not be giving a pussy away as easy. We just don't have those consequences in that regard.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Not in that regard.

[Tam Bam]

And that's why we need more wise men and daddies and uncles.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I want to go back to something that you said, though. You said you didn't know strippers. They would make a lot of money, but they still didn't. That's part of the finesse. They probably were telling you that they like, why would I ever have money? I never have money.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I don't give.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Even if I got money and I've.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Known them and I've had ones that were friends, I've lived with them, you know.

[AJ Holiday]

You're not lying.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

This is not. They don't have any.

[AJ Holiday]

There's no rich prostitutes.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

They off money like you, you couldn't believe.

[Tam Bam]

Like drug dealers, you know, I always would make jokes about drug dealers. They would always have the same knot. They always had a bunch of money, right? But we don't know how old that knot of money is. Like, how have you recycled? Or you just carry around the same knot for if this your bank account you got in your pocket, they really don't be having a whole bunch of money because they gonna they spend it and they make it right back. They spend it and make it right.

[AJ Holiday]

Back to save money. Like you still got to do good business. Even as a D boy, like some of my homeboys, that's hella successful. That was hustling million dollar dudes. They were, they could have ran businesses. Now that don't mean they could take the mind and then make it work somewhere else because they're not as informed in those specific keys, you know, all of that. But like the homies, most people, she right. Most of my homies that sell drugs, like none of us most money I've had something drugs about ninety something thousand.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Dollars and that kind of money because it doesn't have like proper gateways. It's basically just plastic gift cards. It's retail only money. It's not a tool. It's not the tool that capital is made to be. It's just simply transient gift card cash.

[AJ Holiday]

So he's not tripping when he's saying like I have met a lot of strippers. I never met a rich stripper and I knew strippers, I was making good money, but I never met one that had no money. You know what I mean? They might have a bins, they might have had a little apartment, they might have had some bags, but they ain't never had no money.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

The only time that they get money is when they transition out to being RNs.

[Tam Bam]

And some of them don't make it there they be in cna.

[AJ Holiday]

Because money is not just a. Like that's his point I think too. That's dope. I never thought about that. Money is not just the currency you hold in your hands, right? It's the way America treats you. It's the way you position a dollar itself. It's the way you could leverage the dollar for more. And when you in a dope game, you can't.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I didn't even need to ask if you read Scandal of Money yet. I know you haven't.

[AJ Holiday]

I haven't. Yeah, right. Exactly.

[Tam Bam]

What is it talking about?

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

It's a book about the.

[Tam Bam]

The creation of the system.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

No, it's about the theory of what money actually is.

[Tam Bam]

It's the energy a currency.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

It's a measuring stick, it's a metric. It's not representative of wealth. It's a measurement of wealth and value. It's a definition of what value is. Where money's gone wrong, where baseless currencies, floating currencies, all that kind of stuff. It's just that kind of stuff. N. It's a ruler It's a tool like anything else.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

When bitcoin came out, I just could not wrap my mind around what the it was like at one point. Dollar, the dollar had gold or silver to back in. Right. So bitcoin is just an idea and people put value to it.

[Tam Bam]

The dollar is an idea now cuz it's no longer backed by gold and silver. So now we are giving it the value it has. That's why I'm pissed about my stocks today. And I've been nervous all this time.

[AJ Holiday]

Remember the money? The money that, that we even use now? Right. Abraham Lincoln started printing that money. It wasn't green bags. Like it's some. It's some shit.

[Tam Bam]

Yeah. So having that paper.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

We're gonna be wiping our asses in the notice simultaneously. When you're in bad state of the economy, when everything's going up at the same time, that means the measuring sticks going down.

[Tam Bam]

Exactly.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

You know, you shouldn't have tech stocks, energy stocks, real estate, gold, bonds, everything. So everything's going up against the dollar.

[AJ Holiday]

So. Yeah. That's why strippers really dealing shame. Whether you know it or not. They really still be trying to find somebody rich. Rich people don't try to find somebody rich. They just find somebody.

[Tam Bam]

That's true.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yeah.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Yeah.

[AJ Holiday]

Unless you white, white rich people always try to find other white rich people so they can get richer.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I think we should all like make that decision.

[AJ Holiday]

Women would not get chose at all. If women got chose on a monetary value. It would be bad if men got chosen.

[Tam Bam]

That's why you just lie bad. Like huh.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Finesse.

[Tam Bam]

My homegirl yesterday, she said a guy, this guy she was talking to told her, you know, I thought yesterday I thought about something. I. I don't know nothing about your past. And she was very offended by that. Like why you need to know anything about my past? Like what are you now? Like are you inquiring about me around town now or something like that. I'm crying like you asking about me.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Equal fox now credit check.

[Tam Bam]

Yeah. Don't be checking my whole facts because listen, but I, I like dick facts. I like to see who you were with before, right? Because I. I just don't want to behind certain. I don't want to you behind her. I don't like how she looks. She looks stank. Like I don't want to do it.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yeah.

[Tam Bam]

Like I seen guys baby mama. I mess around and get turned off.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Right.

[Tam Bam]

I'm turned off from you now because I saw what you actually are used to. And that's why I Said men with money, y'all should have access to the women you had access to before you got the bag, right?

[AJ Holiday]

That's how I feel.

[Tam Bam]

Okay.

[AJ Holiday]

I don't change.

[Tam Bam]

Let me see your first baby mama. That's how you know who you dealing with.

[AJ Holiday]

I do not change. I do never. I don't think I'm too good for no woman. Long as she got something to offer. Like, her mind is cool. We cool. I don't give a fuck if she grew up right where I grew up at or she live in Beverly Hills. They all the same. It's the same Tams. We going to the same Tams. Like, I'll take. I. I no lie.

[Tam Bam]

It's a different brand name on there, though.

[AJ Holiday]

I've took wealthy women. I took wealthy women to the burger stand in Compton and I took ghetto girls to the best restaurants in Beverly Hills. I just try to make people experience better. You know what I'm saying? Like, you experience life. I remember. Oh, man, if I told her, she'd be high. But there's one lady who won a Grammy, right? She was like, into me. I think she just a. Like a fetish or something, you know?

[Tam Bam]

I mean, but she was just gang banged. Is that what I'm hearing?

[AJ Holiday]

Weird. She used to get disappointed when she found out. I read and I swear this. Read it, right?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Have you seen the movie American? American Fiction? Is it. Nobody's seen that. It's about this black author. He's very intelligent, but his books won't sell. And then he starts making this literature that's like very ghetto. And he had to become this very ghetto. Like just out. Fresh out of prison. Yeah.

[Tam Bam]

Donald Goins, the white people were like.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Oh, my God, he want his books. Like, they was like, what do you want to call it? He was like, we'll call it Fuck. Like that's what he named the book. And they were like, we love it. This is amazing.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

And it's so real.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yeah, so. So that's basically the goal.

[Tam Bam]

No?

[AJ Holiday]

Yeah. She was just into it. She was just like into it and shit. So when we. I ain't gonna lie, I'm always sober. So I size everything up, up really fast. So I seen what she was into, and I remember I picked her up in my Low Rider and all that. I brought her to this, my favorite spot, Tams, on Long Beach Boulevard, right in Compton. And she was just so blown. It made her day. It made her day. She thought it was just like the greatest thing in the world.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

It's a hood spot.

[AJ Holiday]

Yes, girl.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Guess what? I went to the ghetto for sure.

[AJ Holiday]

You know what I'm saying? So it's like you got to know what people want from you and then it's your job to over deliver.

[Nissan Advertiser]

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[Tam Bam]

Panoramic moonroof, ambient lighting, bows and massaging leather. Appointed seats are optional features.

[Joe Locke]

Is this a good time? It's me, Dylan Mulvaney and my dear friend Joe Locke from Heartstopper. And Agatha all along is my very first guest on my brand new podcast, the Dylan Hour. It's musical mayhem and it is going to be so much fun.

[Tam Bam]

I like a man.

[Joe Locke]

You like a man. What do I like?

[Tam Bam]

Joe, you like a man too.

[Joe Locke]

We often. There's quite similar. There's some cross pollination happening in here.

[Tam Bam]

Not like.

[Joe Locke]

No.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Have we.

[Tam Bam]

No.

[Joe Locke]

No, not yet. Never say never. I cannot wait for all you girls, gays and they to join me on this extremely special pink confection of a podcast. There is so much darkness in this world and what I think we could all use more of is a little joy. Listen to the Dylan hour on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to your podcasts. Love ya.

[John Cameron Mitchell]

This is John Cameron Mitchell and my new fiction podcast series, Cancellation island stars Holly Hunter as Karen, a wellness influencer who launches a rehab for the recently cancelled. In the future we will all be canceled for 15 minutes. But don't worry, we'll take you from broke to woke or your money back. Cancellation Island's revolutionary rehab therapies like Bad Touch Football, Anti Racism, Spin Class and Mandatory ayahuasca ceremonies are designed to force the council to confront their worst impulses. But everything starts to fall apart when people start disappearing. Karen, where have you brought us Cancellation island, where a second chance might just be your last. Listen to Cancellation island on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Kevin Smith]

Hey, kids, it's me, Kevin Smith.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

And it's me, Harley Quinn Smith.

[Kevin Smith]

That's my daughter, man, who my wife has always said is just a beardless d Ckless version of me. And that's the name of our podcast. Beardless D? Ckless Me. I'm the old one.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I'm the young one.

[Kevin Smith]

And every week, we try to make each other laugh really hard. Sounds innocent, doesn't it? A lot of cussing, a lot of bad language. It's for adults only. Or listen to it with your kid. Could be a family show. We're not quite sure. We're still figuring it out.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

It's a work in progress.

[Kevin Smith]

Listen to Beardless with me on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

All right, so I need everybody to share something that they are ashamed of.

[Tam Bam]

I already told y'all, I'm ashamed of that nigga I was pregnant for.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

No, you already told that. You already said.

[Tam Bam]

I'm saying that's my shame.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

That's the only shame you have?

[Tam Bam]

Yes. That I would like to say and not be publicly shamed about. That's so one shame. So when I thought about. I thought about this. This topic a couple weeks ago, but I explained it better maybe last night where we can have a conversation about it. But I told Tam and her homegirl, like, one of the things I'm ashamed of. But I've since learned other bitches do it, too. Okay. When we use public restrooms, we have to squat. And sometimes the aim ain't always, like, on point. Sure. Okay. So if I pee on the toilet seat a little bit, I'm gonna use the toilet tissue, like, first to wipe my wipe first. And then I might, you know, pat. Pat with the same tissue to clean the pee off the toilet.

[AJ Holiday]

Okay.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I was like, we all do that, right?

[Tam Bam]

And I feel like it's the person who comes behind me to use the restroom to be mindful. Don't sit your nasty ass on that toilet. Because it's like, the whole thing is to appear clean, but that is dirty as hell.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Right?

[Tam Bam]

Full of shame.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Okay, all right, here's my.

[AJ Holiday]

This is gonna be good.

[Tam Bam]

Yeah.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Who does anybody else want to go first?

[AJ Holiday]

Oh, no, you brought this up.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

You said you wanted to do this.

[Tam Bam]

Okay, go.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I feel embarrassed. All right. It was Cinco de Mayo.

[AJ Holiday]

Oh, man, this is getting better.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

We went to this Mexican restaurant.

[AJ Holiday]

Oh, my God, this is getting better.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

They had this delicious bean dip.

[AJ Holiday]

Oh, no, this is getting worse.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

We went to the club and we had hookah.

[AJ Holiday]

Something about the hookah and Mexican food. Oh, your stomach is crazy.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I shit in the club, y'all. I took a shit in the club. In the club? Yeah, I took a shit in the.

[Tam Bam]

In the bathroom though, right?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yeah, in the bathroom. Not like at the section. I just.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

So your moment.

[Tam Bam]

I've never taken a shit at the club.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I pooped in a club.

[Tam Bam]

Look, I'm a stoner. I'm stoning you. I cannot believe you took a shit in the club.

[AJ Holiday]

That's your story.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I can't believe you. You went to the restroom. In the restroom.

[AJ Holiday]

White people. You see what I said? White people just like. So you use the restroom. Pete got so much so.

[Tam Bam]

Yo, you took a shit in the club. You came back and party like you was regular bitch. I can't take a shit without taking a shower.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I came back and enjoyed my night and I shit in a club.

[AJ Holiday]

Different levels of shit.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Did you take anybody home that night?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

No, I didn't.

[Tam Bam]

Shitty booty.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Okay, that one, that one.

[Tam Bam]

Why the fuck everybody naked over here? Dog, what is happening? We stayed. We saw naked bitches all day telling you with no shame.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Welcome to Atlanta with no shame. Yeah, so. All right, I told y'all my story. Like, judge me if you will.

[Tam Bam]

Come on, Rose Gold.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Jesus. The last time I embarked on a shame derived monologue, we got suicide watch emails.

[AJ Holiday]

Oh, yeah, to him he was shade.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

So I don't even know. My whole life is defined by shame. I mean like, you want like a. Like a funny shame story or like, like just.

[Tam Bam]

Okay, maybe think about some shit that some. That something every time we say from here on out, look at me. Just something you don't want people to know or something.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

No one knows me anyhow. Anybody that knows me knows my. No one.

[Tam Bam]

That.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

No one that doesn't know me just doesn't know me.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Stop looking at me.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Sorry.

[AJ Holiday]

Go ahead.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

No, I mean, probably my worst is just like a myriadly long through my 20s situation. Just. Just like perpetually finding myself having woken up from drunken stupors in places I didn't know where the hell they were, how I got there, and then having to go, go backtrack, like myself into coherent functionality. Like how the. Where Am I?

[Tam Bam]

And who is this?

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

How the. Did I get here? No, it wouldn't even be.

[Tam Bam]

Oh, you would just be, like, on the street somewhere, like.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

But I. But like, oh, where's my phone? My phone's gone.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Whose baby is this?

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I don't know where I am.

[Tam Bam]

Like, blackout.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I gotta go find where my car is. I gotta get my wallet back. All this other type of fine. And then. Ah, did I. Am I gonna get arrested when I go outside? Like, do I. Did I do something? Did somebody is gonna be somebody after me? Like, all this type of having to try to backtrack and then the worst part of it is getting the phone and you got to look in the phone.

[AJ Holiday]

Oh, it's like hangover.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I gotta call somebody who was around last night so I can do a responsibility check to make sure that I gotta know, you know, there's something I got to deal with that's very, very serious. And those calls, those like, 11:00am oh, you're alive. Yes. Don't rub it in.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

You owe me money, man.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Last night I got a really, really, really, really. Answered any fires? Nah, none. Just the usual. All right, good.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Have you ever had any huge fires to put out, though?

[Tam Bam]

Not showing up at a girlfriend's house.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

You got married to a stripper last night kind of shit?

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Nah, that wouldn't have been that big a deal.

[Tam Bam]

So he would be a good hangover character?

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I would be like, me and the hangover would be like the Asian dude in the Hangover sequel.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Just like, way.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

But I don't do drugs. It's just. It's just purely alcohol.

[AJ Holiday]

You see.

[Tam Bam]

So you, you basically listen, you. You were a walk in your whole 20s, basically. Like a spirit can come walk into your. And had you. You just getting animated all over town.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Not my whole 20s. It was like late teens and early 20s. And then there would be like an occasional relaptic moment that just became, you know, further and further spaced out as I went out my. Out of my 20s.

[Tam Bam]

I think I was the drunkest in my 20s, too. And I think about it now is like, why the. Was I drinking that much, like in college?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

It's a right.

[Tam Bam]

That's why I don't drink.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

America.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I did have one fire, and it turned out to be kind of a faux fire, and it turned into a really messed up situation. Like, my whole, like, my last year of high school was like.

[Tam Bam]

Your whole what?

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

My. My whole last year of high school from, like, whatever prom, like in 11th grade, like, I. I hadn't hardly drank that many times before, like, that in my life, but, like, I drank too much of some, like, like fireball. The story of what I did to some girl became very opaque. And I'm like, that sounds like. But I was. I can't. I can't argue. I'm not in a position to argue or push back to anybody. But the story just kept ballooning. And so for, oh, like, a long time, like, years in my hometown, like, there was. There was a lot of that on me and on my reputation, on how people viewed me and saw me, whatever. And I think probably like seven or eight years later, I bumped into this girl. I was friends with her sister, sister's friends, whatever else, and. But I hadn't really gone when I got out of high school. I really just didn't go back there. And so I'm sitting there and I was probably in my late 20s, whatever, and this girl was like. It was like. It was like an awkwardly sound. I was like, hey, you know, I don't think I've ever got a chance to talk to you. I was like, you know, whatever happened? She was like, oh, I mean, nothing, like, really happened. It just kind of got blown way out of proportion. And then. And I'm like, huh? So nothing happened and they got blown out of proportion.

[AJ Holiday]

You got labeled as.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

It depended. Like, I, like, my nose broke. Like, you see my nose broke.

[AJ Holiday]

Sure.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Some dude got pissed at me at a party who was friends with that girl, and he was, like, drunk and trying to start a fight with some. And like, I'm working the type. I'm more worried about winning a fight than losing a fight. So I wasn't too worried about him, but he. And I was like, I'm a roll this dude. And then he said something about that, and I was like, oh, if he wants to punch me and then over that, then I'll, you know, whatever. I'll take it. So I didn't, I didn't. I didn't throw a punch. He. I. I let him take off and get. Get a couple, and I just slipped like five or six and somebody grabbed him or whatever. But, like, when I was done letting him hit me, he didn't hit me again.

[AJ Holiday]

So you had to walk with that label, whatever that was.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

So, like, for a while, it was.

[AJ Holiday]

Like, is the label.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

No. Well, that what it was was I had, like, hit her, then it was like I'd beat her. Then it was like I beat her and pulled her into a closet and tried to rape. It was like, anybody who the thing told just kept adding a new chapter to this book and I found out.

[AJ Holiday]

It was like high school work.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

It was like well no, you just got really mad and were like kind of raise your voice at me. I'm like huh?

[Tam Bam]

But it started with her though. She had to have told people these stories.

[AJ Holiday]

No, she told somebody a simple story and it's a bunch of drunk kids in high school.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Yeah. And probably got razzled and stuff and was emotional and I. People start crying.

[AJ Holiday]

He kicked his ass. Oh he jumped on her and stepped.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Her out and find out for probably 10 years. Man, that sucked. But that was only my own fault because if it wasn't for that, that wouldn't have gone on anyway. I would, you know, would have traumatizing like you living with this therapy, this.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Scarlet letter over some that never really happened.

[Tam Bam]

I remember one of my subs like not substitute but like a tutor. This after school program I was in. In middle. In middle school like sixth grade. This lady really. I lived with shame until I was an adult thinking I had done something to this lady. And when she told me what I supposedly did to her. So after I finished, after I stopped going to the after school program, all the kids told her I used to talk shit about her. Like she's really the reason I started wearing eyelashes. This lady had long real hair, black lady. But she would always wear lashes and I loved the lashes. So she came to me after I stopped the program because she lives three doors down from my mom still and she's real sick now. And that's why you don't with me. So she was like. She was like, yeah, you told all the kids I wore weave and all this weird. And I'm not going to tell your mom. I'm gonna let you tell her. So I was afraid for years. Like I felt like I really did something to her. And now as an adult I realize I ain't do to you. You might have had a couple tracks and you wear fake lashes. Like that's the truth. But she had me feeling like I really did because I didn't have that. Yes, you shame kids into not even being themselves no more. Understand adults do that. Adults kill little people.

[AJ Holiday]

I thank God I was such an honorary kid.

[Tam Bam]

What's your shame glasses? What you shame about? Oh, you already said you shame because your ass working out.

[AJ Holiday]

Not just working out, but just eating better.

[Tam Bam]

Right.

[AJ Holiday]

You wanna know a good story? This is a good story. About 32, 33 years old. So this is roughly 11 years ago. 44 now. So it's 33. 30, maybe 33, 34. I had met a girl, right? And she started Dming me on Instagram, right? So I was like, you know, she was cool. She would just talk to me. I didn't trip, whatever. We ran into each other in real life. She's like probably 5 foot 4, 11, 5 1. Somewhere in there. This really short girl, right? Petite. She's cute. And she was just on me. She just liked me a lot. And she had a cool personality. So I ended up sleeping with her, right? I end up sleeping with her probably a little bit more. Because when I was fucking with her, my dick felt like it was 16 inches long.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Cause she was so tiny and her.

[AJ Holiday]

Hands were so little.

[Tam Bam]

Was she a little person?

[AJ Holiday]

No. She was close to it, though.

[Tam Bam]

Like, Tammy height.

[AJ Holiday]

No.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Way shorter than Tammy tall. I'm like five.

[AJ Holiday]

Way shorter than 10, right?

[Tam Bam]

I got my measuring tape.

[AJ Holiday]

So she was shorter than tan. So I kept sleeping with her because of, like, she would do here feel big.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

That was it. You didn't like her. You just were using her for her hands.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I have.

[AJ Holiday]

That's the truth.

[Tam Bam]

Hold on.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I have hypothesized that that is the root cause behind the white guy, Asian girl fetish thing. Like since I was. Since forever.

[AJ Holiday]

Like, so don't get me wrong. Like. Like a girl that's regular size, you know, it's two heads is normal. But like, she would have needed like five or six hands. And it just take my strong hand.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I imagine this with this take my.

[AJ Holiday]

Hand, made my Dick feel like 18 inches long. And I just kept. Sleep with her. You should so embarrass.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

You should be ashamed of that right now.

[AJ Holiday]

I didn't even like her.

[Tam Bam]

I'm trying to find this.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

It was this.

[Tam Bam]

It was this. It's a series on Amazon. And one of the characters just passed away recently. A young guy. He looks. He's a biracial dude. But these kids have superhero. It's called V, something like that. V. Like all of these kids got this vaccine at some point. Like, their parents signed them up for this experiment. And now they all like in a school together where they all have like these special powers. And so one of the girls, she can make herself really big, like giant. And then. Or she can get really small. So whenever she felt depressed, she'd be. You'd be looking for her and she would be sitting right here somewhere, right?

[AJ Holiday]

She felt shame.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

She was tiny.

[Tam Bam]

So the dude she was dating, like, he was acting like he liked her so much because her fucking. She was making Herself little around his dick on the fucking. On the episode. Like she's sliding down a dick. Like they showed a dick and it was her.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

And it was her whole body sliding down. Yeah.

[Tam Bam]

So she just like holding on like.

[AJ Holiday]

Yeah. So.

[Tam Bam]

Yeah, go to the left. Go to the left.

[AJ Holiday]

So shameful.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

That's glasses.

[AJ Holiday]

It's so shameful. It's so shameful.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I never told that story. Woman's body sliding.

[AJ Holiday]

I never told that story out loud.

[Tam Bam]

On his wet dick.

[AJ Holiday]

Like, I've never told this story out loud. So it's so funny. That was. Now that I think about it, I was like, that is hella shit.

[Tam Bam]

So you meant to stop with her after the first time, but you way after the first time.

[AJ Holiday]

Like, right after the first time, I.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Bounced back in my steps.

[AJ Holiday]

Really the reason why, because I kind of took up this. I took up this morale point at like 28. I was like, yo, if I'm not gonna be with you, I'm not gonna sleep with you. So that kind of changed a lot, right? So if I can't be with you, I'm not gonna sleep. 99% of the girls we interact with, we can't be with. You know what I mean? And I could tell cause I'm always sober. So, like, I knew I couldn't be with her even before we slept together. So I should have never got that far. But even once I slept with her, I knew I shouldn't have been with her anymore because there was no way we could be together.

[Tam Bam]

That's the only time he had a 16 incher.

[AJ Holiday]

Man, I felt like Godzilla, you know what I'm saying? It's the greatest, one of the greatest experiences we have.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

This segment on our.

[Tam Bam]

I was about to say, are we going to trade it out for the. For the shame? Same us saying our little shameful things. Is that a trade out for. For a SIMP series?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

It is. I mean, do y'all want to tell another embarrassing moment perhaps when y'all got.

[Tam Bam]

Played by the opposite sex?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

When you got played by the opposite sex.

[AJ Holiday]

Oh, that happens all. Yeah, that happened to me when I grown up a lot. I remember I took this girl that slept with like three, four dudes on the football team to not scary. I left her there.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

No, you already told that story on our show. You gotta tell a different one.

[AJ Holiday]

That happened too.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

You told that before. Look.

[Tam Bam]

So we'll get one for Rose Gold and that'll be it.

[AJ Holiday]

Pete, a girl played you.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Yeah.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Oh, he got a new one. Please.

[Tam Bam]

Everybody else story be from high school.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I've let myself get played sometimes to prove a point or out of. Usually if I get played, it's out of my own arrogance where I'm like, oh, whatever. If I gotta, like, bend the rules a little bit to get some more FaceTime. Or she just. She just hasn't been around me enough, long enough to like you, to get it. To understand what's. What's really, you know, good for her.

[AJ Holiday]

Yeah, to understand magic.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

So That's.

[AJ Holiday]

That's.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

That's 99 and a half percent of any, you know, rude incidents like that. But this one was weird. I've never in my life. Of all the scammer and all the. All the LA lifestyle, all of it for. Since forever. I've never ever seen anything like this before in my entire life. 40 years when she did. I've known this girl for damn, like nine or ten years. No, her mom, we go back like, cool. She's the only person that's come to visit me in Miami since I've been in Florida, like, whatever. So I get her a ticket out here, like last month, and I pick her from the airport. We go to dinner, stop off at Walmart. She buys all of her or whatever. She had some family out. She was going to go see her niece and some people. Whatever. All right, cool, Great. So next morning, you know, she gets up, gets dressed and goes. And I shot her a text in the afternoon, like, hey, there's this thing that's like Taco Tuesday deal, if you want to go. I didn't want to go, but I was like, if they wanted to go, oh, I don't know what we're doing. Well, then later in the night, I got to, you know, know if you're coming back, so I can let you back in. So I text her on here for her, like, well, I'm getting tired. I want to go to sleep. So I call, man, blocked my number.

[Tam Bam]

She used you for a flight?

[AJ Holiday]

Yes.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Which is so odd because she'd been out and stayed with me for a week twice before. And I've known, like I said, I've known this one for 10 years.

[AJ Holiday]

I told you.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

And she blocked my.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I didn't start.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Yeah, I Her years ago, but y'all.

[Tam Bam]

Just recently started back around.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Nah, I wouldn't. I didn't even that night.

[Tam Bam]

Sometimes it'd be subtle. Women make up in their minds that they.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Okay, alive.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

She is alive.

[AJ Holiday]

And he didn't understand, but he did. I told him he did something.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I didn't do anything.

[AJ Holiday]

She don't know she might be did.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

You find she on some she on some scam. She on some dumb But I didn't know I know for sure.

[Tam Bam]

Did you give her your credit card number to book the flight or you booked it for her?

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I booked it.

[Tam Bam]

Oh okay.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

I'm just trying to see somebody for.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

360 and I have not since is your bathroom.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

No, that's not enough.

[AJ Holiday]

It's not enough. He did something was like it was weird.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

It was like in the morning she's talking to whoever she's talking to like oh yeah we're over here. I'm at Peter's place. It wasn't like she was oh that was was that that was also was weird like oh she came I got swoked up by some dude whoever the picked her up. When you're telling the person you're saying you're at my it was just.

[Tam Bam]

And you haven't spoken to her since.

[AJ Holiday]

Saw some picture she found something somewhere.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Nothing in there. Place is a science. She wasn't in my phone. My place is a science lab. It's sterile and how does this make you feel?

[Harley Quinn Smith]

You feel played?

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I feel played. I'm just like puzzled. Yeah I'm like what in the living I don't mind like what the you.

[Tam Bam]

Got to do why you ain't just ask me to buy the ticket?

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I wasn't so there's. It just doesn't. It's like for. For what it was like what for what was it the it was. I only bought one way it was like 150 bucks for 150 like what.

[AJ Holiday]

Are we talking about he did something I keep telling I didn't do anything.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

You had cuz why would I mean this is someone you don't is she for 150 ticket is she on. She's on crack. That's the only it's cocaine.

[Tam Bam]

It's got it got to be coke. She might have ended up on a drug binge whenever she left your house and she just can't even tell you she's ashamed what she did. She's ashamed, you know for the 360 something happened. Oh no. Something happened.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Yeah, something happened.

[AJ Holiday]

I keep tell he said nothing happened.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Don't work that way. Something happened. It was. She got another dude.

[AJ Holiday]

No she wouldn't have blocked you 360 like that.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Yeah she was just.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Why wouldn't she just tell you you.

[Tam Bam]

Might have fart in your sleep, dog. You might have fart on her in your sleep.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

No, that one was still talking on the phone.

[AJ Holiday]

No that Wouldn't have did nothing. That's one of them. I saw something that. That really me up. That led me. And it's not that it's like.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Because if you know someone for that fucking long, then you. We. She was up at my place like three hours. Like you can. You know, I'm saying if you. If someone on that was that weird person like her can't hide that in her face. You know what I mean? Like, you know, like if someone's. If someone uncomfortable.

[Tam Bam]

So she wasn't seeming uncomfortable at all. At no point.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Regulars, all that like that, that.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Are you sure she's alive?

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

Yeah, for sure.

[Tam Bam]

You know, they create AIs. This is website called these People are not Real dot com.

[AJ Holiday]

Oh.

[Tam Bam]

And she could be on there. You just keep hitting the hit and refresh and a different person pops up and they don't. They're not real people. So maybe they done created the AI of her on her social media doing.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

She really might not be here anymore.

[Tam Bam]

She's got Tyrone.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

I know for a fact. But like, I wish.

[Tam Bam]

Or did he?

[AJ Holiday]

I wish.

[Tam Bam]

Okay, y'all. All right, y'all. If you enjoyed this episode, y'all tune in every Thursday on the Black Effect podcast, I heart radio app or wherever the you get your podcast at. This your co host, AJ Holiday. Y'all follow me on Instagram. Kick a tam.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

It's official Tam bam on Instagram. Y'all follow me.

[Tam Bam]

Remember, speak now and never hold your peace.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

Are your ceilings.

[Tam Bam]

We Talk Back podcast is a production of iHeartRadio. Visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.

[John Cameron Mitchell]

This is John Cameron Mitchell and my new fiction podcast series, Cancellation island stars Holly Hunter as Karen, a wellness influencer who launches a rehab for the recently canceled. In the future, we will all be canceled for 15 minutes. But don't worry, we'll take you from bright broke to woke or your money back. Cancellation Island's revolutionary rehab therapies, like bad touch football, anti racism spin class, and mandatory ayahuasca ceremonies are designed to force the council to confront their worst impulses. But everything starts to fall apart when people start disappearing. Karen, where have you brought us Cancellation island? Where a second chance might just be your last. Listen to Cancellation island on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Kevin Smith]

Hey, kids, it's me, Kevin Smith.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

And it's me, Harley Quinn Smith.

[Kevin Smith]

That's my daughter, man, who my wife has always said is just a beardless version of me. And that's the name of our podcast. Beardless Me. I'm the old one, I'm the young one. And every week we try to make each other laugh really hard. Sounds innocent, doesn't it? Lot of cussing, a lot of bad language. It's for adults only. Or listen to it with your kid. Could be a family show. We're not quite sure. We're still figuring it out.

[Harley Quinn Smith]

It's a work in progress.

[Kevin Smith]

Listen to Beardless me on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Damien Hurst]

Do you remember what you said the first night I came over here?

[AJ Holiday]

Ow. Go slower.

[Damien Hurst]

From Blumhouse TV, iHeart podcasts and Ember 20 comes an all new fictional comedy podcast series. Join the flighty Damien Hurst as he unravels the mystery of his victim Spanish boyfriend. I've been spending all my time looking for answers about what happened to Santi and what's the way to find a missing person. Sleep with everyone he knew, obviously. Listen to the hookup on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.

[Joe Locke]

I'm ready to fight.

[Tam Bam]

Oh, this is Fighting Words. Okay, I'll put the hammer back. Hi, I'm George M. Johnson, a best selling author with a second most banned book in America.

[Damien Hurst]

Now more than ever, we need to use our voices to fight back.

[AJ Holiday]

Part of the power of black queer creativity is the fact that we got us.

[Tam Bam]

You know, we are the greatest culture makers in world history. Listen to Fighting words on the iHeartRadio.

[Karen (from Cancellation Island)]

App, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcast.