020: NDS Chronicles - Arson

Summary

Nephilim Death Squad - Episode 020: NDS Chronicles - Arson

Release Date: May 29, 2025

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Introduction to NDS Chronicles

In Episode 020 of Nephilim Death Squad, hosts TopLobsta and Raven delve deep into the realm of paranormal testimonies submitted by their listeners. This episode, titled "NDS Chronicles - Arson," centers around eerie and unsettling accounts that blend conspiracy theories with biblical perspectives.

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Listener Testimonies

Cody Gringham's Sleep Paralysis Experience

One of the standout stories comes from a listener named Cody Gringham, who shares his harrowing experience with sleep paralysis and its profound impact on his spiritual journey.

• Initial Experience: Cody recounts experiencing his first sleep paralysis during high school, where he felt an overpowering sense of dread and encountered a sinister presence.

  Cody [10:27]: "The rabbit hole led me deep into the world of conspiracies. And before I knew it, I was rethinking everything I thought I knew, including my belief in God."

• Spiritual Awakening: After multiple encounters with sleep paralysis, Cody began searching for spiritual solace. He describes a pivotal night where he prayed to Jesus Christ during an episode, leading to an immediate cessation of the terrifying presence.

  Cody [37:22]: "The moment that is burned into my memory forever is when I said the word Jesus Christ. Because the instant those words left my lips, it was gone completely instantly, like someone flipped a switch."

• Impact on Belief: This experience solidified Cody's belief in God, contrasting his earlier atheistic stance and highlighting the intersection of paranormal experiences and spirituality.

  Cody [37:29]: "That experience solidified my belief in God. I've always been someone who needs firsthand experience to truly believe in something, and this was undeniable."

Jabrowski's Orb Sightings and CE5 Encounters

Another compelling submission is from a listener named Jabrowski, who details his sightings of mysterious orbs and subsequent encounters that verge on the supernatural.

• Orb Sightings: Jabrowski describes observing bright orbs in the sky, their unexplained movements, and patterns that defy conventional explanations.

  Jabrowski [49:32]: "I noticed a very bright star that looked out of place... within five seconds, it fades into black and it's gone."

• CE5 Activities: He touches upon his involvement with CE5 (Close Encounters of the Fifth Kind) activities, attempting to establish communication with extraterrestrial entities, which seemingly led to more intense paranormal experiences.

  Jabrowski [51:25]: "The CE5 will end in things that are, like, poltergeist activity, and they'll end in, like, demonic encounters, and... alien abduction experiences."

• Personal Trauma: His account culminates in a traumatic incident where his actions lead to arson, questioning the reliability of his memories and experiences.

  Jabrowski [67:07]: "I ended up admitting to committing the arsons after several hours of being interrogated and spent the next four years in prison."

Cheryl and Dakota's Short Submissions

The hosts also address shorter submissions from listeners like Cheryl and Dakota, who express discomfort with the podcast's language despite their interest in its paranormal themes.

• Cheryl's Feedback:

  Cheryl [94:39]: "I happen to find your show and was happy to listen until the F bomb and other curses... I can't deal with the language."

• Dakota's Story:

  Dakota shares a fragmented account of personal experiences intertwined with drug use and supernatural phenomena, though parts of his story remain incomplete.

  Dakota [93:25]: "But it's hard to think that as I reflect back on those times. During this time, I slept in a den room that was at the back of the house."

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Audience Interaction and Demographics

TopLobsta and Raven engage in candid discussions about their audience demographics, revealing that approximately 17% of their listeners are women. They express surprise and disbelief at the significant female listenership, addressing comments and feedback from listeners like Cheryl and Dakota with a mix of humor and frustration.

Top [57:09]: "One fifth of our audience is women. And I posted that. Yes. The other day I posted it on Twitter and I was like, these women are crazy. Like, these women in particular."

The hosts also grapple with balancing authentic content with audience sensitivities, debating the inclusion of explicit language and its impact on different listener groups.

David [97:36]: "But if you're like me, then you would feel the same way. You go, oh, this is good content. I want to listen to it in that way."

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Controversial Content and Host Commentary

Throughout the episode, Top and David maintain a raw and unfiltered tone, often using derogatory language to express their disdain for negative feedback and certain listener behaviors. They discuss personal anecdotes involving drug use, criminal activities, and supernatural encounters, intertwining them with critiques of societal norms and contemporary issues.

• On Audience Criticism:

  David [101:07]: "They want to stop beating their ass. Like, tie one hand behind your back. This is an unfair fight."

• On Language Use:

  Top [94:39]: "On Philander, I don't know. And other curses started to consume the conversation. I listened to Blurry Creatures and we know prophecy watchers, etc. I don't even know the rest of those shows. Love the subjects and your podcast piqued my interest. Sorry to say I can't deal with the language. Even though I like your subjects. Respectfully, Cheryl."

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Plans and Announcements

The hosts make several announcements related to their Patreon model, urging listeners to support them for exclusive content and early episode access. They also discuss the upcoming event at Bohemian Grove, promoting ticket sales and VIP experiences.

David [104:08]: "Go to patreon.com/backslash Nephilim Death Squad and sign up for whatever you want. I don't care. But it'll help you continue watching this."

They express enthusiasm for their fanbase and plan interactive segments, including potential musical performances by a character named Toad, aiming to enhance listener engagement during live shows.

Top [42:24]: "Has he done anything recently? I don't know. Do we have time for it?"

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Conclusion

Episode 020 of Nephilim Death Squad offers a blend of intense listener stories, candid host interactions, and robust discussions on paranormal phenomena. While the episode navigates through personal traumas, supernatural encounters, and audience dynamics, it maintains the show's signature edgy and unfiltered style. Listeners are encouraged to support the podcast through Patreon for continued access to exclusive content and live interactions.

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Notable Quotes

• Cody Gringham [37:22]: "I prayed to Jesus Christ... it was gone completely instantly, like someone flipped a switch."

• Jabrowski [51:25]: "The CE5 will end in things that are, like, poltergeist activity, and they'll end in, like, demonic encounters."

• Cheryl [94:39]: "I can't deal with the language. Even though I like your subjects."

• Top [57:09]: "One fifth of our audience is women... these women are crazy."

• David [101:07]: "They want to stop beating their ass. This is an unfair fight."

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For more detailed testimonies and exclusive content, become a supporter of Nephilim Death Squad here.

Transcript

[David]

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[Top]

No matter what you're building.

[David]

You shouldn't have to worry about how fast you can cover your roof. Zip System Roof assembly is an easy to install panel and tape system that helps you quickly achieve rough dry in to keep your roof all zipped up. Watch easy installation [e-mail] packages by Expedia.

[Top]

You were made to be rechargeable we were made to package flights, hotels and hammocks for less Expedia Made to Travel Top Lobster Productions we are being hypnotized by people like this news readers, politicians, teachers, lecturers. We are in a country and in a world that is being run by unbelievably sick people. The chasm between what we talk cold.

[David]

Is going on and what is really.

[Top]

Going on is absolutely enormous. Oh yeah dude, there's some Nephilim shit.

[David]

It's like we all know what's going down but no one's saying shit. What happened to the home of the brave? They control us now when no one's talking about how they made us finally slaves and everybody's just walking around heading the clouds and won't awaken to a dead in the grave. But then it's too late. We need to be ready to raise up welcome to the end of day Everybody is slave. Only some are aware that the government releasing poison welcome back ladies and gentlemen to another episode of NDS Chronicles, the show where we read your submitted paranormal testimony. You can submit those paranormal [e-mail] if you want us to read your stories. That's Chronicles NDS gmail.com also guys, a little bit of it's not business and we're just letting you know that at half an hour mark we're going to cut this stream and go live exclusively to patreon.com backslash Nephilim Death Squad and you can continue enjoying this show, engaging in the live chat, enjoying an ad free Experience and graining early. Graining early access to the episode before the general public does. And you can do it all for free. If you sign up for the seven day free trial at patreon.com backslash Nephilim Death Squad. Try to absorb all of our backlog content. Impossible because we make more content than we can put out. And you can try to get out of there before the billing cycle kicks.

[Top]

That's right.

[David]

But you're going to want to stay.

[Top]

Get there. Join the Spotify. Join the other podcast app. Spotify is where the video will be. Other podcast app is where the, the audio will be. Ad free. It's great. It's. It's a fucking great value. It's a great.

[David]

It is, dude. It is because we, we, we, we record so much for every one episode that we release, we've recorded two to three. And at that rate we're simply never going to catch up. Honestly, one day I'm, I'm considering, you know, doing some sort of like all of our, all of our material was in a memberships place and it's like, maybe, maybe that's okay. Maybe that's okay. Maybe we don't need to be out and about on Rumble because that platform is dying and it sucks. Maybe we don't need to be out and about on YouTube because that platform also sucks. But all of our stuff is there. Patreon.com backslash netflix squad also guys, Bohemian Grove tickets are available. Go to brogrove.com and pick them up. They are moving. This has been fucking awesome. We did a good job exclusively giving tickets to the Patreon members. And so all the VIP tickets went and then some. So that means that we're gonna have a packed house of dangerous. And that's exactly what I wanted. But the cat's out of the bag now, guys. And the tickets are available to everyone. So if you are a late comer, if you didn't get them, go to brogrove.com and pick up your tickets before they're gone because surely they will be soon. What are we going to talk about today?

[Top]

Buy them now. Go buy them. They're. They're for sale. They're saying that they miss broke. David. I don't know what that means. Oh.

[David]

Oh. Because I have Pokemon card money now. That's why things have changed me. Yeah, you know, it's, it's not a, not a big deal, but I am podcast rich now and I do. I just be. I'm just buying Pokemon cards. Look at that Vaporeon. Look at that Holographic vaporeon, guys. If you're coming to Leesburg, Florida, if you're coming to hang out with it. Look at that baby bad boy. Isn't that beautiful? If you're coming to Leesburg, Florida, here's my. My ride shoe. That's a nice one, too. Really like that ride shoe. My favorite one.

[Top]

Yeah.

[David]

Be sure to stop at the local card shop and pick me up some holographic cards, okay? That'd be a nice gift.

[Top]

To pay homage to. To David. Go ahead and stop. Stop off there and buy him a rare holographic Pokemon card. Whatever you want.

[David]

I know that there is a sealed. I actually, this is how crazy I am about old school Pokemon cards. I don't even want to say it. I'll say it on the air. But I swear to God, if any of you come to Leesburg and you steal this card, I will find you and I will buy it.

[Top]

I'm gonna go buy it right now. I'm gonna be there.

[David]

No, no, I'm not even gonna say, you know what? No, I'm not. Because you will do that. You're the type of motherfucker that. Go buy my card up.

[Top]

I will rip it. What is it?

[David]

God, I would just tell me.

[Top]

Just tell me, because I want to know. They're not going to buy it.

[David]

It's a sealed. It's still in the seal. Right in the package. Holographic gen 1. It's a first edition machamp.

[Top]

How much does it cost?

[David]

It's like 45. I bought a fucking 35 card the last time I was there. So I was like, let's not go too crazy. But I got my eyes on. Don't go to Leesburg. If I find out, I will interview. I'll tell them to pull up the security footage and I will find whoever it is that takes that card. Yeah. Pokemon cards in a few cans of Celsius is. That's it, man. Living the dream. Living.

[Top]

I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do a GoFundMe right now, guys. Like $5 between 9. I can buy it today and at Bohemian Grove. I will cut it in front of me.

[David]

No, don't do that. Don't do that. It's a beautiful card. It's a beautiful card.

[Top]

Snip it right in front of his face.

[David]

Look, I'm talking to my Pokemon card homies. Remember the 151? Remember the original booster packs when we were kids? Remember how it came with a holographic Machamp? It's that one. It's the first edition holographic Machamp still in the wrapping. No, don't look. Look, I'll take it as a gift. Please don't steal it from me. Don't do that. That would deeply upset me because I am coming back for it. And if you guys are looking for gifts, there you go. No matter what you're building, you shouldn't have to worry about how fast you can cover your roof.

[Top]

Zip system.

[David]

Roof assembly is an easy to install panel and tape system that helps quickly achieve rough dry in eliminating the need for felt. Whether you're adapting to schedules, codes, or weather, our products keep your roof all zipped up. Watch easy installation tips to protect roofs during and after [e-mail]. all right, that's it. Wrap up the show.

[Top]

That's. Oh, well, one more point of business. So we have. There's a possible way to open up another like 7. 7 seats for VIP. 7 more spots? I think so. Yeah. How do we.

[David]

How do we do that?

[Top]

I run the numbers and we're allowed to number runner.

[David]

Hold on. I just saw somebody in the chat say Fat Pikachu from the Jungle Pack is. Is peak. And I know I got that fat piece of hiding in here somewhere. Hold on a second. This is a Pokemon card episode. Guys, this is great podcast. It is great podcasting. We're gonna get into some of the Chronicle submissions at some point, I imagine, but are you. I knew it. I had a feeling. You made me big screen. Give me a second, guys.

[Top]

We're gonna just waiting. Flip it through the microphone so at least we can get the ASMR and hear it.

[David]

Oh, here it is. Here it is. Oh, no, this isn't Jungle Pack. I thought it was this one. It is Fat Pikachu. Fat Pikachu is not Jungle Pack dog. When they did Jungle Pack.

[Top]

Oh, that's a nice.

[David]

You lost a couple of pounds. He lost a couple of pounds. So. So not quite accurate. I know which one the Jungle Pack is, though. That's a good Pikachu. I guess he's fat, too. Anyway, let's get into today's show. We're gonna start with Cody. This was. What was that? March 30th. March 30th. And he does. He does say. He says, what's up, guys? I don't care if you dox me. So there we go. So I could just say Cody Gringham.

[Top]

Thank you for writing for us for Massachusetts.

[David]

Wait, wait, wait. Did you just say his last name? You're not supposed to say his last name. Dude, he just said he doesn't care. All right, I typically. It's like a soft doxing.

[Top]

All right, well, whatever, go ahead and read it. We're gonna check.

[David]

All right, let's get into it. What's up, guys? I don't care if you dox me or you could just say Cody. Okay, so yeah, if you do end up reading this. Haha.

[Top]

Well, we are.

[David]

He says, I'll start by saying I found your show after listening to the Paranormies a few months back. I'm actually not familiar with the Paranormies. Top bought it because we were to say, who the hell is the Paranormies and I? Somebody that we like, lightly beefed with on Twitter and then they remember now.

[Top]

No, yeah, he is cool. Like, so I forgot what the beef even was. But it was one of those things where like, we're just like pushing each other and then it was like, wait, I like you. He's like, yeah, I like you too. I like.

[David]

I like when that happens because, you know, sometimes you be dragging somebody and then. And then you like their style and they like your style and you go, oh, you know, we're homies. And that's always nice when that goes away. Johnny started the podcast by saying that he listens to nds, so I looked you all up and I've been binging your shit ever since. Oh, thank you. That's very nice, Johnny. I guess over at the Paranormal. Shout out the fucking paranormal. Go listen to those guys. See what they're all about. You should definitely go on or have them on. I think it would be a cool ass episode. Maybe we could make that happen. Anyway, I've been listening to NDS Chronicles for the past couple of episodes and I now feel compelled to share my story. Lol. Is that a joke? I'm going to try to condense it as much as possible so it's not super long and boring. So here it goes. All right, guys, here it goes. I'll start off by saying I was never religious growing up. In fact, I was the exact opposite. I was your typical edgy atheist, convinced I had everything figured out and that anyone who believed in God was just ignorant. So worse. Kind of.

[Top]

Very cool. Very cool.

[David]

Yeah. Yeah. I'm so. I'm blessed. I never went through the atheist phase. Very gay. But in my late mid to late 20s, I started questioning a lot of what science claimed to be the absolute truth. The rabbit hole led me deep into the world of conspiracies. And before I knew it, I was rethinking everything I thought I knew, including my belief in God. Many such cases, right? That's the. What does Sam Tripley say? He's like, conspiracy always leads to spirituality because you're just inundated with so much conspiracy shit that has this spiritual backdrop that you're forced to address it. It's like, yeah, I get that they're banging kids, but why are they doing ritual when they're doing it right? Okay, I'll try to keep this as brief as possible because I tend to go into way too much detail and don't want this to turn into a ten page novel. So some people don't spare us that. Some people go, fucking, you're gonna read all this, you bitch. And you're gonna enjoy it. And, you know, that's cool too, I guess. But after listening to your podcast, I realized that many guests and listeners have had experiences eerily similar to mine. That's why I feel like I need to share my own story. Cool. Cool. That's one of the things I love about Tony's show, is you're listening to it and if you've had a couple of weird things happen in your life, you recognize the patterns. Even though strange shit happens to people, it's not that different from what a lot of other people go through. They just don't talk about it. The first incident. Hold on a second there. It's a little loud. The first incident I experienced was my first ever case of sleep paralysis. Oh, my God, dude. My son has a phone now and.

[Top]

Oh, no. Paralysis from the phone?

[David]

No, he hasn't had sleep paralysis from the phone. But we're going through his messages, his group messages. You know, he's got, like, friends from school, and they're all just, like, you know, aggressively talking about sleep paralysis. Like, they're obsessed with the idea of sleep paralysis, these children. And I think it's because a lot of the new. I guess this is Gen Alpha, their entertainment on YouTube. It started in our kind of circles, actually. Might have been Gen Z that did this. I think Gen Z is responsible for the Benadryl Hatman narrative. And then it kind of became a meme. So once the hat man became a meme, sleep paralysis became a meme. Like the way you see, like, sleep paralysis demon memes all the time. So now meme culture has bled into Gen Alpha and they're, like, obsessed with this fucking notion of sleep paralysis. I'm like, that's not good.

[Top]

Well, look, this is why all these people have sleep paralysis out here. Look at this shit. It's like smoking weed in front of your newborn baby.

[David]

Wow.

[Top]

And then doing some shoulder presses with it.

[David]

I, I could respect the shoulder presses. That's crazy. And she's just thinking about how she hates that. Who left for milk and never returned. Yeah, that's it. That's a woman who's, who's over head pressing a baby and thinking about her deep hatred for men.

[Top]

And the baby too. Oh my God. It's crazy.

[David]

Why would you record yourself doing that? That's a wild, that's a wild move.

[Top]

I'm just looking at that and thinking about the generational trauma. Like, oh, yeah, you're. You're getting a baby high, secondhand high off a smoke. And you're opening some kind of doorways in this poor baby's minds that like the kids are already, they're already like open to the supernatural. When you do that, when you, when you give a baby a psychedelic or a drug like that, it's like, dude, completely ruined.

[David]

Yeah, that's one of the things that I think, you know, because they say in men, your prefrontal cortex isn't done developing and that's the, the part of your brain that's like decision making and, and delaying instant gratification. Like that sort of a thing isn't, isn't done developing in men until 25. And I started smoking at like 16 and then like smoking heavily, constantly. And you know, got to the point where like by the time I was 17, when I was homeless, luckily I had enough friends when I was homeless that I always had weed. I never had to pay for any of it, but it was like back to back to back to back. Like we would sit down and from the moment we linked up to the moment we separated that night, it would be blunt after blunt after blunt. And I'm like, that's why I'm crazy. That's why there's something wrong with me. Something that did something terrible to my developing mind. And now I'm basically retarded. It just, I'm blessed that it happens to be entertaining and confirm. Can confirm. Okay, so first incident I experienced was my first ever case of sleep paralysis. I was in high school at the time. Somewhere between 2010 and 2013. I don't remember the exact year, but I know I was in my old bedroom in my childhood home. I woke up, but I couldn't move. Instantly, I was hit with this overwhelming soul crushing sense of dread. Yes, there it is. There it is. Then as my eyes adjusted to the darkness, I saw it hovering above me. Near the ceiling. A classic gray alien face with massive black lifeless eyes staring straight into me as it floated closer. Man, you saw a demon, baby boy. But those are those. So already he's talking about patterns that I recognize, right? Which is waking up that you can't. And you can't move but then instantly hit with this overwhelming soul. Crushing sense of dread is the way that he describes it. And some people who haven't experienced that would be like what the fuck kind of pattern is that? Yeah, we know. Sleep paralysis. Of course you're going to be scared if you wake up paralyzed. No, it is far beyond logical fear. This is not your analytical mind processing what's happening around you and then making a judgment about the level of danger that you're in. This is a fear for your mortal soul. It's fucking cr. It's a. It's a bizarre fear. And I've said it before, I'll say it again. Nothing in waking life ever merits that level of fear. I don't give a fuck what it is. You could be experiencing home invasion. There's something else. It's. It's almost like it's put upon you. Instead of a naturally occurring sense of fear. The moment our eyes locked, I experienced something impossible to describe in words. It was like hearing the loudest, most ear piercing scream imaginable. Yet at the same time it was completely silent. It was as if the sound wasn't coming from the outside world but instead drilling directly into my brain. It was the most.

[Top]

What's that like telepathy?

[David]

Yeah, I guess so. Yeah. I mean I've heard that a lot when they just communicate with you is. You know, you see their face but their mouths aren't necessarily moving in the set. And the sounds not coming from their. It's. You know, it's being projected into your head. But this is fucked up. I just decided to scream at him.

[Top]

Mine screamed at you.

[David]

Mind screamed at you. Not good. Not good actually.

[Top]

Hilarious to do to somebody.

[David]

Do you? I like to think if they are just automatons and drones then they probably don't have a sense of humor. But I wonder. I think the whole situation of the abduction experience becomes a lot more nefarious if these things have a sense of humor because then they're no longer. It's like there's a Stockholm syndrome where some people will get abducted but still return thinking highly of their abduct. Abductors. Abductors. And there should be like Oregon Trail.

[Top]

But you play from the. The point of view of the. The demon Slash alien.

[David]

And you're like, that's an Oregon Trail.

[Top]

No, they. No, there should be. It should be an NDS Oregon Trail where you are the demon slash alien. And it starts off. Every game starts off as like, okay, you're in the bedroom. And it's like, okay, you gotta. Now you have to press a button. You gotta zap them. And it's like, boom. Okay, he's in sleep paralysis. Did he do it right? Oh, he woke up. Oh, you're dead. He killed you because he's just a bag of bones. All right, you make it past that level, what do you do? You have, like, six options that you could choose. You have to get it to either, like, follow you back to the ship, or you have to scare it, or. Honestly, every single time I'm fucking screaming at it, I'm just gonna go.

[David]

Spam that button.

[Top]

Mind scream. It's the most hilarious thing you could do to somebody who doesn't understand the concept of telepathy. Just something in front of it scream and watch a shit its pants. And then event is over. You didn't get any semen from this guy, but you got a lot of screams.

[David]

You have people, though, that they leave there and they're like. You know, it's like, okay, they took your pregnancy, right? Or they impregnated you. Let's start.

[Top]

You died of piss and Terry.

[David]

Z man with the fucking bangers. So. So you have. They're taking you against your will. They're impregnating you, which is to say they're. They're raping you. And then in some cases, they're taking your pregnancy. And there are still people that can't separate. They're like, ah, yeah, but they're doing it because I'm special and we're preparing for something, you know, a coming calamity, whatever it is. Like, trust me, they know what they're doing. Despite the fact that this is all so invasive. And I think that if people ever got the sense, like, if there was just one. If there was one abductee who was on the fence, who wasn't too sure, but then went through regressive hypnosis, and they're like, I'm on the table. They've clamped my wrist down, They've clamped my ankles down. They're now aggressively penetrating my asshole with, you know, what appears to be a space dildo. But they're laughing. I swear I heard them chuckle. Once the chuckle happens, it's all out of the window. You're never gonna believe that they have to maintain an air of seriousness. If they. If they do have a sense of humor and they ever do laugh at putting things in your butt, that is not. I think that's worse.

[Top]

This is for the betterment of humanity. And they're like, put this in your butt.

[David]

Unbelievable. All right, all right, all right. Where the hell were we? It was the most. Okay, it wasn't as if the sound.

[Top]

Was kind of times, it was the worst of times, it was the best.

[David]

Of times, it was the worst of times. That was my favorite episode of hey, Arnold. If it. It was as if the sound wasn't coming from the outside world, but it was instead drilling directly into my brain. It was the most primal, gut wrenching terror I have ever felt. And then nothing. I don't remember if I woke up blacked out, or just snapped back into normal consciousness, but the next thing I knew, I was awake and frantically searching online for an explanation.

[Top]

That means that you leaned back into it, homie. They presented you the. The space dildo, and you were like, just take it.

[David]

And you never even heard them passed out before you heard him laugh.

[Top]

That's it. Yeah.

[David]

Before you heard him laugh. So he says that was the first time he ever heard the term sleep paralysis. That's a fucking nightmare, right? Because I had something similar, but it was the opposite. He goes through sleep paralysis. He then starts researching, which is bad. I'm not saying you shouldn't do it, but I'm just saying I know what you found. And having just gone through a fucking sleep paralysis experience, the last shit you really want to do is find out that this is a worldwide phenomenon and there's a. A plethora of different entities, from hat men to fucking, you know, tall, skinny grays. And they're doing everything from choking you out demonically to. To artificially inseminate. Like.

[Top]

I know we don't really play this game that much. Is it gay? Sleep paralysis gay?

[David]

Is sleep paralysis gay? Yeah, because it's like you're being dominated, right? Like, what? Some. All right, there are some women out there who like to be, like, choked, right? And so you're in a. What would you call it, missionary position, and you're doing some choking, some light choking, and this is all very sexual. Now all you do is you remove the penetration, but it's the same thing now. You're a man lying on your back, and you're getting dominated by this thing, and you're getting choked, and it's asking you, do you like this? But it's doing it in ancient Sumerian. So you have no idea what.

[Top]

Just mind.

[David]

Please don't just do the mind screaming.

[Top]

I told somebody someone was messaging me and people in the inner chat, in the inner group. If you're part of the patreon, then you're part of the. The private group chats. You'll know who I'm talking about. But this person messaged me and he was like, I just get so mad, and I try to, like, not get mad, and I don't know what to do. And how do you handle it? He asked me how I handle it. Like, about people doing and how I handle. And I was like, I just think it's gay to let another man get inside of you, whether it be your butthole or your emotional hole. Yeah, your hole, your mind.

[David]

Don't let. Don't let any. Don't let men inside your holes.

[Top]

Yeah, no, dude, don't. Not gonna be in my mind hole, not in my content hole, not my butthole, none of those holes. So, yeah, whenever I come across it, I just go, not going to be gay with that. You know, not in that hole. Yeah, none of my holes. My holes are for my, my wife, I think.

[David]

And you know what?

[Top]

My E hole.

[David]

I. I do think that there's something.

[Top]

That happens your T hole for this.

[David]

Do you remember when you were younger, right, and you first met your. Your wife, and you would, you'd be enamored. You're like, you know, you're in the pursuit, you're in the chase. You're trying to. You're trying to woo her to win her over. And, and you'll even have these moments where you're like, you know, you're thinking about her before you go to sleep, right? You go, that's. That's the last thing you're thinking about is what. What slick thing did you say via text message or did she say, you know, that kind of stuff? It's very gay to be thinking of an entity, and that's the last thing you think about before you go to sleep. You know, like, that kind of stuff is reserved for people that you're dating or people that you're killing, because I imagine you do spend some time thinking about your mortal enemies and the way you're going to thwart their plans against you. Those are the only two times anybody should occupy your mind before you go to sleep. If you're. If your mind is being occupied by something and you're afraid of it, and what are you afraid of? It's going to get on top of you. It's going to choke you. And it's going to say, do you like when Daddy does that? But it's going to do it in Sumerian. That is gay. Pretty gay. That's very gay.

[Top]

Yeah.

[David]

Yeah. So don't. Don't. If you experience sleep paralysis, same as sucking your cousin's dick. It was the most. Okay, so I don't remember.

[Top]

It was the worst of times.

[David]

Here, you want to take this over? Flash forward to 2022.

[Top]

I'm now married, living in an apartment with my wife, our dog, and our cat. My wife was pregnant with our first daughter at the time. Over the years, I had continued to experience sleep paralysis occasionally, but I never found a way to stop it once it started. However, this was also the time when I was. When I was actively searching for a relationship with God. I had been listening to a podcast or watching a video about sleep paralysis, and someone mentioned that if you pray in the name of Jesus Christ, it will stop instantly. Okay, we've heard that that doesn't work all the time from a couple of people. I think Timothy Albarino was the first to mention it, and Fringe also had mentioned it. I don't know how true it is. I don't know exactly what's going on, but that's what people say. But whatever.

[David]

From now on, we're only allowed to reference Timothy Albarino as Indiana Moans.

[Top]

Indiana Moan. Like, yeah, actually, that's it.

[David]

From now on, he's Indiana Moans.

[Top]

Have you seen the mounds in Peru? All right, we'll stop.

[David]

The name of Jesus doesn't always work.

[Top]

Yeah, he wears like. I like him, but, like, the pants. Pants he wears are kind of too tight. Also why you always look like you're going on an adventure.

[David]

I. I fucking love that about him, though. As much as I call him Indiana Moans, it's because I'm a big fucking hater. Because this guy gets to go spelunking and crawling all over ancient artifacts and megalithic sites and shit while we.

[Top]

This is Gay Dog. If I'm going to megalithic sites, I'm wearing my fucking Pool Jordans, all right?

[David]

If we go to megalithic sites, it's to sacrifice Toad. That is exactly the only reason. If I ever climb to the top of a temple, it is to sink a blade deep into the heart of Toad. Not because I dislike him, but because I will reap great benefit from.

[Top]

Oh, for sure.

[David]

Worthy sacrifice.

[Top]

This is a top 10 podcast if we do that. But you got to stick it in his T hole, right in that lower back. You got to get it in there. Real nice.

[David]

Knuckle deep. At least. Knuckle deep.

[Top]

I had experienced it. I had experienced it so many times by then that I figured, what do I have to lose if it happens again, I try it. So he's just fine with, like, you're just saying you're okay with all the gay shit that happens to you, and now you're just giving in, but you're.

[David]

Like, well, no, no, he's saying. He's saying, like, it. I've been dominated several times by these mind screamers. And maybe this time I'll try calling on Jesus Christ, see how that works. What do I have to lose?

[Top]

Imagine the torture.

[David]

It would really be a nightmare by.

[Top]

A great alien and just screams at you.

[David]

Like, just fucking constantly silent screaming. Unbelievable.

[Top]

Then one night, it happened. My wife, my dog, and my cat and I were all asleep in bed. I woke up paralyzed, staring at the ceiling. I could move my eyes just enough to see my wife and pets beside me, completely still. And then came the familiar wave of dread, the silent scream. So every time this thing comes, it's.

[David]

Just like a hundred percent, it's fucking with him. 100%. It's fucking with him that just shows up and screams in your mind. Holy. Unbelievable.

[Top]

You ever seen the sun from Rick and Morty? The. The sun that just screams?

[David]

Yeah. How it screams? Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. Just screaming in your ears. Or not your ears, your.

[Top]

Your.

[David]

Your mind hole.

[Top]

The silence, screaming, the crushing, suffocating fear. And honestly, that's. That's horrifying from, like, a dead sleep. My son has done that. My daughter, too. Like, they wake up, they have, like, a bad dream. They just start screaming. They just scream. And I'm like, fuck. What happens?

[David]

Yeah, everything's all chaotic when you get woken up like that. Yeah, yeah. Not good. Honestly, that's what makes me feel like. I know that if you do that to somebody, you'll generate a disproportionate amount of fear. And I do think that these things feed off of it. They're attracted to that sort of negative energy. But it also strikes me as very funny. Like, that's how you would prank your homie, right? Like, you would just, like, if we were ever hanging out and then Clint was sleeping, if we walked up and we said, on three. One, two, three. And then we just went.

[Top]

And we started screaming, disoriented for like five minutes.

[David]

And we would have the best time ever getting to see that.

[Top]

This is why I said, like, with that. That girl. I saw that. Are you with Those five midgets in the room and the one tall girl, you're like, how do you defeat all of them? You have to water balloon. So it's like shock factor. You walk in, you slap somebody as hard as you can, or you scream in their mind. In their mind. And they go.

[David]

That would be the. Yeah, if I had fucking telepathy, I would use it very poorly. I would, I would scream at the cashier that I walk by. 100%, 100%.

[Top]

He's like, cash or credit? And you just scream in her mind.

[David]

And then I'll tell you what, I forgot to tell you this. So the other day I left, I was going to the corner store to get some ice, and I'm walking through my parking lot, and for the first time I think since I've arrived, I was like, oh, this place is really shit. Like, this is the hood. And I hate it because it's not. As you're leaving. As I'm leaving. Yeah. Well, what happens is God puts road rose colored glasses on me. So everything that I see that I know, I think it's amazing.

[Top]

You put rose colored glasses on yourself.

[David]

Maybe. Maybe I do that. And God's like, you gotta go, you gotta get the out of here.

[Top]

Then you wear them on stream.

[David]

That's true. All right, fine, fine. But he removes those rose colored glasses as it gets close to me leaving that place so I could see it for what it is. So I leave, I walk out, I see a guy and he's in the parking lot and he's just fucking acting crazy. And I'm like, I gotta go around the building now. I can't go that way because he's there. Who knows who, he's gonna ask me for a dollar or some shit. So I start walking around a different way. Then all of a sudden there's just like shirtless dude covered in tattoos who's just tweaking, like in the fucking parking lot. And I'm like, great, now I got to walk past that guy. So whatever. I go into the corner store and as soon as I walk in, I. Dude, I never. I never leave my gun home. I never leave my gun home. One fucking time. One time. I leave my gun home and 15 black dudes walk in and they have skin ski masks and they have red bandanas hanging out of their pockets. And the only part of their faces that you could see covered in tattoos. And all they're talking about is guns. They call them their blickies. So they're just some. Oh, blicky. This Blicky that. And they're just going off talking about their guns non stop.

[Top]

Blicky this. Blicky.

[David]

Yeah, dude. And I'm just like, man, like, I'm. I'm. I'm trying to. And then of course, like, black people have this thing that they do where they love to narrate because the energy of a black person is often. I wish a motherfucker would, right? And so they'll do provocative things, right?

[Top]

So you see what you're saying is just not untrue. Like, you're just saying things and everyone's going, you've been there. But we're supposed to act like we have, and it's crazy.

[David]

Well, this is one that. You'll hear this and you'll know that black people do this. So I go over, I get myself a little zip zap water from the thing, and I go, hey, what's up, Frank? He goes, hey, David, how you doing? I go, hey, hey, can I get three bags of ice? And he goes, yeah, David, no problem. And then all I hear from behind me is, damn, three bags. Isn't they getting three bags of ice for my three bags?

[Top]

You must have a big freezer.

[David]

They. Yeah, out the freezer. Oh, damn. Oh, this gonna pay for. Oh, pulling out his card. Gonna get.

[Top]

He's trying to get you. He's trying to get you to respond. And look at all I. Yeah.

[David]

Oh, because it makes you. Because you're talking about me. You're not saying anything and you're talking about me, but you're not talking to me, right? So it makes you want to turn around and say, what? And then they'd be like, what you say? And then they'll stab you and shoot you and kill you. And so it just really upset me.

[Top]

Because what you're saying is, I don't know if people are, like, unaware of this. I'm looking at the chat. Or people that will listen to this in the future. I don't care if you're black or not. If you listen to this. I wonder, I wonder. What are you, black people?

[David]

Why do you narrate what we do?

[Top]

It's not all of them, but, like, the ones that we're talking about, they do. And this exact technique. You know what? Somebody threw a. They hit me with a battery. They threw a battery at me on the bus. They were doing the same thing when I was in high school. Assault with double A battery.

[David]

Salt and battery, baby.

[Top]

Yo, listen, they. Somebody threw it, and they must have threw it. Like, I swear to God, he In my mind, he threw it like this, like, Like a monkey throw.

[David]

Yeah, he's like, wherever that goes.

[Top]

It hit me in the head and I, I felt it. But I, I heard them talking the same way to get me to turn around and this hit me and I had a lump on my head and I'm like. So I, like, I don't do anything and I wait for a second and I see the battery roll towards my foot and I pick it up and then I turn around and it's my stop. And I go, who the do this? And they all go like, quiet. Now they're waiting to see, like, what I do. And I said, who threw it? And it's just like monkey noises. So I just take it like, they don't know what I'm gonna do now. So I just take in that as hard as I can. And I threw it. Look, if I would have hit somebody, I would have killed them. Went right to the back of the bus and all you heard was like, wow. To the, to the metal. And I was off the bus. I was gone. But I was like, yo, yeah, you.

[David]

Got to take your little wins where you can, because if you, if you overstay your welcome, you get stabbed. That I was going to get.

[Top]

Yeah, I was going to get jumped there, but I was like, if I hit one of them, I don't care. Like some, like, why would you do that? But this is just what they do.

[David]

I guess it's just like, here we go. Raven is a cousin sucker says ironic to assault someone with a battery, but then still not be able to change the battery in your smoke alarm. Was it, Was it a 9 volt? It was like, this belongs in your smoke alarm, dog. This isn't a weapon. This isn't a projectile to, to hurt somebody with, I don't know, 9 volt.

[Top]

I would have definitely killed somebody if I hit it, but it was a double A and I threw that. I'm telling you, threw it. I was throwing like 90 at the time I was in.

[David]

He says, was he black? Yeah, we already established that we're telling stories about black people.

[Top]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. This person. Well, it was a whole bunch of them anyway.

[David]

I want to know though, if you're, if you're a black audience member and even if you don't do this, but you know the reason, I would love to know why. Like, you know, they'll see somebody walking by and they're like, shit, Nick got two feet walking. Look at him walking with their shoes. And they had, look, look, look, look at him. Look at him. Look at him walking. Look at him swinging his hands. He got two hands.

[Top]

Well, they might start saying, I've been in a situation where it'd be like, blue pants, black shoes on. And I'm like, this guy talking about me. And then, like, once you. Once you buy into it and you go like, huh? Then they're like, what the you looking at? What are you looking at? What are you looking at, son? And then another one said, oh, why is he looking at you like that? And it's like, you'll be looking at me, son. And now they're both talking to you. I'm like, now I'm gonna either have to kill one of them or they're gonna kill both of me. And it's like, why? So I just said, you know what I did? I got a U Haul truck. And I said, I'm. I'm moving. I typed the demographics where you're not.

[David]

That's it.

[Top]

We go. And then I go there.

[David]

Demographics where you're not is it Is. Was the actual Google.

[Top]

Very sad. Very racist. Also very true. Very true.

[David]

All right, enough about bedroom door. Actual shadow people.

[Top]

The bedroom door slowly creaked open. A thick, black mistake, like a living, writhing fog began creeping in from the hallway, slithering along the ceiling. If you've ever seen the black smoke from Lost, it was just like that. Oh, cool, we're gonna have a smoke machine at Bohemian Grove. Apparently.

[David]

That's a crazy plug, dude. Holy crazy plug.

[Top]

Evan hall will be there. He said he's bringing magic mushrooms. Okay.

[David]

Mushrooms?

[Top]

Fuck, yeah. I will not be doing those, but that's fine.

[David]

Bring me Pokemon cards.

[Top]

Is it Machamp? Machamp. Holographic seal.

[David]

Why did you put inflection on it like that? Don't do that.

[Top]

Machamp or Machamp?

[David]

Not Machamp.

[Top]

Some people say Nephilim. I don't like.

[David]

That's true. I don't like when they do. I go, hey, you know what this show is called? And they go, that's not how it's pronounced. And I'm like, we're fucking tomato. Tomato.

[Top]

Yeah.

[David]

It's an accent, all right.

[Top]

He watched an absolute terror as it floated. I watched as it floated toward us because he's still in the room with all of his wife and his cat and his dog. The pressure in the room growing heavier with every second. And then, as it descended toward us like it was about to enter or consume us, I did something I'd never done before. I prayed.

[David]

Mind scream.

[Top]

Mind scream.

[David]

You just got a mind scream at Jesus. Jesus, please.

[Top]

I don't remember my exact words, but I know I begged for protection for my wife, my unborn child, my dog, and my cat. But the moment, but the moment that is burned into my memory forever is when I said the word Jesus Christ. Because the instant those words left my lips, it was gone completely instantly, like someone flipped a switch. The fog vanished in the air and the room became lighter and my body was suddenly free. I could move again. Everything was exactly the same. My wife, my dog, my cat, still in their places. But it was as if reality had been reset in a fraction of a second. That experience solidified my belief in God. I've always been someone who needs first hand experience to truly believe in something, and this was undeniable. I've had other sleep paralysis experiences since then, but nothing came close to the intensity of that night. I'm not proofreading this, so if it sucks, thanks and keep up the good work, guys. Thank you, Cody.

[David]

Thank you, thank you.

[Top]

Excellent story.

[David]

Yeah, that right there at the embryo. The experience solidified my belief in God and I've always been the type of person who needs to see it firsthand. That's why a lot of people will try to push me on Jesus and they're like, oh, what if it's just an aggregor? What if it's a thought form? What if your belief in this thing gives it and otherwise it doesn't exist anywhere but in your mind and that you could. Conversely, you know, maybe. Actually I don't even know if I made that word up or used it correctly if it is real. But you could use the name of like any other deity and it would save you from it. And I'm just like, dude, when you're that desperate, it is the, the thing that sticks out to me is how insulting it would be to like turn on God and be like, I'm not too sure. Like, I was pretty sure in that moment when I, when I prayed to Jesus to save my bitch ass. I was very sure, you know, gay.

[Top]

To say to be that way. It's like, yes, that's how you want to do it.

[David]

Okay, that's what I'm saying. Like, I never want to do that because I know that that fear and that desperation was so potent in the moment that it eliminated any doubt that I had. And then it's just so convenient when you're not being beset upon by a greasy demon to then be like, well, let's get into this idea of Christos oil, you know what I mean? It's like, I wasn't saved by oil. My. My wife wasn't saved by oil. My. My son wasn't saved by oil. And he wasn't saved by the 33 vertebrae in his spine either. You know what I mean? Like, it's. It's just. It's. It's very gay to. When it's convenient, then start having your doubts. So I know what he's saying there, and I agree.

[Top]

It's kind of funny. It's kind of funny to do that.

[David]

It is funny to do it, but it's a. It's a gay. Like. Like, I'm not saying there's anything wrong with, like, taking in information, but. But if it comes from a place of, like, doubt, you got to recognize how convenient it is to doubt when you're not desperate. You know what I mean? Like, it's just. You want nothing more in the world than to be saved in that moment. And then as soon as that moment passes. Now this thing that was the most important thing in the world.

[Top]

Nah.

[David]

Yeah. No, I don't think so. I'm like, ah, that's not good.

[Top]

It's. It's hilarious. It's hilarious to do. Hilariously insulting, but yeah, good for him, man. Good for him. He.

[David]

Where is. Did we. Did. Did Nancy do a no call, no show? We got a docker pay. Where. Where is she today? This is crazy.

[Top]

She's not here. She might be in the hospital working or whatever. She does.

[David]

Whatever she does. She just makes up stuff. Yeah, I don't think she has a job.

[Top]

She's probably looking at, you know, fucking dead videos. All right, so we got a couple more in here. What is this?

[David]

Oh, we got to kick out these. These poor people, though, because the. The wealthy members of our Patreon are displeased having. Sharing their quarters.

[Top]

Oh, that's right. Okay.

[David]

36 is live, by the way.

[Top]

Yeah, not anymore. Not for most of you. Sorry. See you in Florida, Evan. Thank you.

[David]

Hey, check that out.

[Top]

We will be there.

[David]

Guys, we're at the 40 minute mark and we're gonna cut it. If you're watching someplace else that's not patreon.com backslash nephilim death squad. You're stupid.

[Top]

That's it.

[David]

Go to patreon.com backslash Nephilim Death Squad and sign up for whatever you want. I don't care. But it'll help you continue watching this. And if you don't do that, that's fine too, I suppose.

[Top]

I suppose, I suppose. See you later, guys.

[David]

Give me A second. I gotta make a ppa. I gotta. I gotta turn on my ac.

[Top]

Oh, wait up. Before you go, let's. Let's turn on. Let me. Let me kick music.

[David]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Top]

We'll give some sh. Shouldn't have kicked him out.

[David]

Transition.

[Top]

Yeah, yeah, we'll kick. We'll kick everyone out, and then we'll play some. Some good waiting music. What do we have. What do we have today? Has he. Has he done anything recently?

[David]

Is he gonna do a musical performance at Bohemian Grove or Rapapalooza?

[Top]

I don't know. Do we have time for it?

[David]

Even if it's five minutes, one song would be adorable. Honestly, if Toad did one song, you know, the fucking, like, the whole audience would go wild.

[Top]

Yeah, most likely.

[David]

That's what I want. I want Toad to play a song on ukulele. And then I want us to cheer disproportionately hard.

[Top]

All right, guys. Everybody cheer. For the next three minutes.

[C]

I wish that I could stay but you are.

[Top]

You.

[C]

And more than this I wish you could have seen my face in backseat staring out the window I'll do anything for you. Kill anyone for you so leave me something, dad. Cause I will be coming back in freeze to cut these lips I love you. The morning will come in the press of every kiss With a head upon my chest Where I will adore you with every waking breath until you decide to wake up I've learned through up in faith and these curves around your face and I'm the one you hold forever if morning ever comes for either one of us Then disappointed you wherever. I'll do anything for you and this story is for you I'd do anything for you Kill anyone for you so leave yourself intact. Cause I won't be coming back in a freeze to get these lips. I love you. The morning will come in the press of every kiss with your head upon my chest Where I will adore you with every waking breath until you decide to wake up.

[Top]

Beautiful. Beautiful. Thank you, Toad.

[David]

That was nice. I don't. I don't think he's here, right? Toad's not here. Toad's not in the chat. He shouldn't be in the chat.

[Top]

No, I don't think he's in the chat. I told him that we're playing his music, though.

[David]

I saw that. So this is what I want. I want to tell the audience because it would be our Patreon members who. Who are buying up VIP tickets and who are going to be, you know, close to the front. I want to do this thing With. With Toad. And that is, I want to get, like, a sign, and I want it to say, like, go apeshit. And when Toad steps out there, I want to pop out from behind that thing, and I want everybody to go fucking nuts. I want to create. Remember that thing where they would show a child on the Jumbotron? Remember that? When they would show the kid on the Jumbotron and everybody would cheer, and then every time it would cut away, people would, like, boo at something and they'd cut back to the child and the crowd would go crazy. That's what I want to do. Every time I pop out with that sign, I want people. I want motherfuckers outside to hear us screaming for Toad. Okay? That's what I want. I want him. And if we can pull this off without him ever knowing that that happened until he sees the footage, that would be the greatest shit in the world. Just pop out from somewhere.

[Top]

How great.

[David]

Ape shit.

[Top]

How great would this be? Like, we have Shane Cashman announce him. Like, do, like, a. An entire, like, dramatic announcement. He comes out in the dark, and then boom. Like, spotlight. And once the spotlight goes on him, people just fucking lose their shit. Can we, like.

[David]

Can we get him a frog hat? You know, the adorable little frog hat.

[Top]

With the little toad hat?

[David]

Yeah, a little toad hat.

[Top]

If. I think we. I think we could dress him up however we want. I think we want him.

[David]

Guys. I just want you guys.

[Top]

Can we. Boo Jose, if you could.

[David]

Boo Jose. It's a up dude. He would be. He would fall the apart, like, what the. The one time I get on stage and do some. But. But I want people to. I want you guys to, like, lose your voices screaming for Toad. I want women in the audience to show their tits.

[Top]

We want Toad chants. We want, like.

[David]

Yeah, yeah. I want randomly throughout the show, crazy for Toad. I want women to ask Toad to sign their tits.

[Top]

When Owen Benjamin is doing stand up. I want you guys to just do like we want to. We want. Don't do that.

[David]

No, no, but. But we'll do that. Okay, so just keep an eye out for the sign, because I'll be popping out with the sign that says, fucking go ape. And it's all about Toad. All right, we finished with Cody. Thank you, Cody. Sweet, sweet Cody. Cody who? Who shall be doxed. And now I guess we're gonna go to Jabrowski.

[Top]

Yeah, I like Jabrowski.

[David]

I like that name. And he says, melee, question mark.

[Top]

Melee, question mark. One out of two pages, but really, it's only one page.

[David]

Yeah. It's strange.

[Top]

Read that.

[David]

Okay. He says, yo, Raven and Top. Yeah, what's up?

[Top]

What a retard.

[David]

He says, I see orbs, like every couple of days or weeks on my way back to work. It started about last winter. One morning, heading out to work, I noticed a very bright star that looked out of place. I really think, what's that?

[Top]

A morning star? Some say that it's woke.

[David]

Yes, the. The. The light bearer. Don't. Don't really think too much of it. You know, I got. I got up to piss and then I fucking forgot to turn my AC on. I'm sweating. Don't really think too much of it. But a couple of seconds later, look back to the same area and it's gone. Kind of just brush it off and keep driving. And it happens again. This time I literally watch it flare to the brightness of a star in the sky. Then within five seconds, it fades into black and it's gone. I saw something similar to that once. It was like a meteor. It lit up in the sky and it left a trail. And then it dimmed. And then it just kept going, like indefinitely, forever. Not very fast, like the speed of a plane, you know. And it just kept going. I watched it for fucking almost 20 minutes until it finally disappeared into the horizon. This goes on for a week or two, always in the same general area of the sky. But one day I'm stopping to turn onto a main road. And as I'm coming to a stop, I see three of these orbs in a vertical line. I'm watching the bottom orb. I'm watch as I'm watching, excuse me, the bottom orb moves forward and they form a triangle and just fade away. A month or two goes by and I see another orb. And I decide to tell my brother who rides with me to look. He did. And he saw it and thought it was weird. But after that, I didn't see them for the whole summer. This winter they pick back up again. Usually only one. Excuse me. But sometimes two. One time I was kind of doing CE. A. CE5 thing.

[Top]

Not kind of.

[David]

Kind of. Yeah. I mean, you know, it's. Where does the line between thinking about a UFO showing up and CE5, where's that line? You know what I mean? Like, I don't know, because that's how they're doing it. They're meditating and they're telepathically calling these things in. And I was just thinking towards to sky to appear. Towards the sky to appear. Okay, so he's looking at the sky and he's thinking that he wants something to appear.

[Top]

And I hit a striping.

[David]

Holy, dude. And I hit a snow drift. Went sideways. And as I'm correcting, one of the orbs flashes super bright and makes an upside down U shape and flares out right in front of me. What the. That's crazy. That thing was. That was its way of being like, eyes on the road, homie. Jeez. Then just this past Monday, I saw another 3er. 3er and watched the bottom left orb disappear, then the right one, then the top one. It's weird. And it's. And it's just here happening. Lol. It's wild. Anyway, I hope this reads well. I be retarded. Love the show. Keep up the good work. He spelled it. Technically, it says detarded. I think he means danger tarred. Right? We're detarded.

[Top]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[David]

I like that. I also got locked in a room by something, and that was pretty wild. Also. Also, Raven, I'm the guy who tweeted that little footprint to you. Oh, that's right. Yeah. This dude sent me. Either that or he tagged me in a footprint out in the woods. And it's a pretty decent sized footprint, but it's just strange because he was so deep into the woods and it was a bare footprint. Like, it was bare feet. In other words, like, a man is walking around, no shoes out there, and he's got a considerable.

[Top]

A barefoot.

[David]

This is a guy with a big foot. I wouldn't say it was a big footprint as much as I would say it was just a big footprint. But then it's like, why is there a barefoot man walking around out here in the forest? That's very strange. Yeah, man. Thanks for the story. Probably stop focusing on those.

[Top]

Yeah. Because don't think about them.

[David]

Right. The CE5, the more you do it. I think I saw a fringe posting about, oh, my God, did I miss a phone call from my wife? That's not good. The. I'm sorry, I'm at the.

[Top]

I'm at the store right now. There's 15 black guys talking about blickies.

[David]

I know. What's going on. Anyway, so the CE5 will end in things that are, like, poltergeist activity, and they'll end in, like, demonic encounters, and. And they'll end in alien abduction experiences. And there was a time where I was, like, thinking about, is it inherently wrong to astral project or to remote view? And I was asking God to sort of guide me on it. And if it's a natural, functioning thing that's not inherently bad to engage in, then show me how to do it. And if it is bad to engage in, then let me know. And then almost immediately afterwards, we got hit by an email that was like, yeah, dude. I started doing the remote viewing, astral projecting, and it just led to demonic experiences, abduction experiences, sleep paralysis, poltergeist activity. And it's like, okay, there you go. There. There's your answer. Don't do it if you aren't a fan of having that happen to you. So I would say, Jabrowski, don't fucking do that no more, baby boy. Also, keep your eyes on the road. Good God.

[Top]

Now. Damn. This guy's like a dick. You're, like addicted to doing that stuff, huh? That's crazy.

[David]

That's like me driving and auctioning Pokemon cards or buying Pokemon cards.

[Top]

I do say, yeah, I do the same thing. One a nice pair of Jordans. Like that, but. All right, go call your wife. I'm gonna read Dakota.

[David]

Oh, no, we're all good. She said it was an accident, that she just never let me know it was an accident.

[Top]

All right, good for her. I'm glad she's alive. All right, let's check out Dakota. This was in the nds. NDS Chronicles at the bottom there. You can email us at chronicles ndsmail.com that's where we want our emails to go to so that way our other email doesn't get clogged up and this doesn't get missed.

[David]

But Nancy, Dakota, I'm getting Jabrowski, Victoria Thomas, and go back and refresh it.

[Top]

I put. I just put it in there.

[David]

Okay. Okay.

[Top]

Yeah, it's in the email. There's a couple more that needs to be updated with it, but like I said, Nancy. Nancy Docs in that pay.

[David]

Nancy Docs and that pay.

[Top]

My name is Dakota. Soft docs is. Okay, we already said it.

[David]

Hello, Dakota.

[Top]

I've been a long time subscriber and I love this channel. Genuine retard due to the amount of acid and other psychedelic drugs I have taken at a youngest age. This is my paranormal experience mixed with a few other stories that may be relevant. I was never a religious person, but the occult always fascinated me. What fascinates me is the amount of females who listen to the show.

[David]

Is Dakota a lady name? Yeah, I guess.

[Top]

I suppose so. Right.

[David]

Would it be Dakota if it was?

[Top]

Let's look that up.

[David]

Honestly, there are.

[Top]

So you ever met a dude named Dakota?

[David]

No, I've never met.

[Top]

Well, name of the episode, A dude named Dakota.

[David]

If you go to our analytics. It tells you, like, what percentage. I'm trying to see if I can find it. What percentage of our audience is women? And I, I. It's not a huge percentage until you start thinking about, like, let's say it was 20. Like 20 of whatever the hell we got going on is quite a bit. So there's like thousands. Thousands of women that listen to this show. What the fuck?

[Top]

That is weird. Let's see audience. We can do that. Audience.

[David]

I'm trying to find it. I can't fucking.

[Top]

I mean, it's like by YouTube. How do I see by gender? We could see a bunch of 35 to 44 year olds for sure. Oh, so male. 82% male, 17% female.

[David]

Yeah, that's a lot. That's a lot.

[Top]

Yeah.

[David]

That's too many. One fifth of our audience is women. And I posted that. Yes. The other day I posted it on Twitter and I was like, these women are crazy. Like, these women in particular.

[Top]

Crazy people.

[David]

Crazy people. Yeah. Yeah. And I guess it's the good kind of crazy, but it's a lot of women that listen to this. Strange.

[Top]

Yeah.

[David]

I don't understand it.

[Top]

Stay away.

[David]

I think women love spooky, to be honest. Not that we do only spooky on the show, but I do think women really love spooky. They like paranormal, ghost stuff, you know.

[Top]

Out of their minds. But, yeah, I think you're right. All right, so let's get back into it. Dakota, whether you be a male or female, as a matter of fact, if you write in you're a female, just let. Let us know that you're literally.

[David]

Look at. Look at the past 10 comments. One woman, two women, three women, four women, five women. Like, that's crazy.

[Top]

Yeah. Look at this. Hi. Hi, ladies. Sorry you're here. All right.

[David]

Sorry that. There's nothing. There's nothing better for you. Honestly, though, I'd rather them be watching this than all the shit that Netflix gears at them. There's no trans characters on this show yet. Well, not yet.

[Top]

We haven't made enough money yet, But David on his way at.

[David]

How much a trans character costs? Quite a bit. All right, you're. So let's keep going here.

[Top]

Okay. One of the earliest memories that stick out to me when I was a child stemmed from when I was roughly five to seven years old and living in a trailer park with my father. So when they say roughly. They said it. I think they said it twice here. Makes me seem like there it's a guy. Women don't use roughly that's true.

[David]

Yeah. Women don't typically. Because that's a unit of measurement and that's not quantifying things. Measuring things.

[Top]

Yeah. They're like, this is what, six inches? Six inches? They don't know.

[David]

Roughly six inches. Six inches, lady.

[Top]

All right. So this person, they thems with their father. Parents divorced when I was one. It was a mobile home that was divided by doors in order to get to the next room. So like a. Like what do they call those? Railway home. So it would be kitchen, living room. Walk through a door and you'd be in my room. Go through a door and you'd be in the bathroom. Go through a door and you'd be in my father's room. That's a fucking nightmare setup.

[David]

The worst shit ever. I almost had an apartment like that when we moved. I forgot where we moved, but I was like, no, I'm not doing that. I'm simply not doing that. I'm not gonna have it so that you have to walk through my bedroom and shit to be.

[Top]

Unless her dad had like a door on the backside there. So his own private.

[David]

I mean, the railway houses. I remember it was like, you know, we were going to get a two bedroom and I would have had to have constantly walked through my son's room every time I wanted to get up, go to the kitchen, go to the bathroom.

[Top]

Not good waking him up every single time. Jesus, A nightmare. So I used to be obsessed with an Elmo doll. That will come up later in the story. Keep a mental note. Might be a girl. I don't know. Bitches love Elmo.

[David]

Bitches do love Elmo. We used to have a haunted Elmo. Not nice Race says does David had David's head look huge compared to his body. So there's a combination of things happening. One, my camera is elevated and then tilted down looking down on me. So my head is the first thing. And also my posture. If it gets like. If I'm back here. Look at how normal everything looks.

[Top]

Proportionate.

[David]

Yeah, that's. That requires me standing or sitting. I fucking. I even drive like that. Like I'm fucking retarded. Everything I do, I fucking do it headfirst. It's very heavy.

[Top]

Head for head first, baby. Like. Like a dog.

[David]

I got to be back here. Like if I'm back here, it just looks like a normal fucking head.

[Top]

Perfect. Now his head. His head is normal sized. All right, here we go. His rings, though. The rings are bigger than you'd expect. Well, one night I had a dream and can still remember it very vividly. My brother and I stole my dad's cargo van and drove up a windy road to a stereotypical Transylvania castle. Once we made it to the door, Scooby Doo answered and was dressed as Dracula. Dumb. But yeah, as I was a child, I was terrified. From the right, right from the gate, he started showing us around the castle until we stumbled upon a room that had the mask Jim Carrey movie in a glass case. My brother broke the case and put the mask on. Bad idea. He started speaking gibberish and was bouncing off the walls. This scared me to the point where I woke up. The moon was shining through my room and I was able to see a figure in the corner next to the door that led to the kitchen living room. It was a smoky figure that was tall. It was doing nothing but heavy breathing and looking at me. I got up from my bed and started to walk towards my dad's room, continually repeating while locking eye contact. Please don't hurt me. Please don't hurt me. Please don't hurt me.

[David]

He's talking to Scooby Doo.

[Top]

He's talking to this shadowy figure standing in his room now as he woke up from the Scooby Doo dream.

[David]

Oh, okay, okay.

[Top]

Once I made it to my dad's room, I collapsed myself onto the floor and promptly fell asleep. Two weeks later, our trailer burned down from an electrical issue. I was just down the street at a friend's house while my dad was at work and discovered could be a coincidence and possibly totally unrelated, but this is the start of the fires. What?

[David]

The fires. Multiple fires. Oh, shit. Yeah, I see he's listing them.

[Top]

She, he. She is listing them. Damn. Ohio fire. Okay, yeah, after the trail. So it says Ohio after the trailer burn.

[David]

I burned a lady's house down once.

[Top]

Wow.

[David]

Yeah. Let me clip that accident. There was a woman who used to let the neighborhood kids pull her weeds and shit if they pulled her weeds and she would let them into her in ground pool. And in hindsight, very suspect. I saw her but once.

[Top]

But how did that happen?

[David]

Was just hanging out. She was asking me because I was transitioning from middle school female, male to female. And she, she's. I remember she's like, are you excited about high school? Do you think? You know, yada, yada, you're gonna be. And I'm like talking to her and I look down. It's just. It's just. No, no. It was all. She was like. I had a. I don't know if her shit was pulled to the side or if she Just wasn't wearing underwear and a. A bathing suit skirt. But either way, she was just letting that old thing hang out. It was very bad, but still, we used to go there all the time, pull the weeds, and we would get to go in the pool. And so sometimes we would wait on her porch for her to get back from work. And then when she got back from work, we'd go, joyce, can we pull your weeds? And as we're waiting there, she had on her porch a bag of charcoal. And we said, oh, that's cool. So we, you know, dumped the charcoal onto the porch on the floor, and then we found lighter fluid and, like, for whatever, maybe like a grill, and we dumped it all over the charcoal and we set it on fire. And we said, this is good. And we were having fun with that. And. And I don't know what happened, but I guess there was something else flammable nearby. So the fire just can't go. We can't get the fire to go out. So what we do is we start running to the backyard pool and grabbing water. We take towels, we throw the towels in the pool, and we now have saturated towels, and we're slapping them on the fire. This is making the fire worse because whatever is flammable is, I guess, an oil base, you know, whatever, so that, you know, it's like a grease fire. So as soon as the water hits it, the whole fucking porch just goes in on fire. And now the walls are on fire and the ceiling of the porch is on fire. And. And we're trying to run in there, but now the heat is just too much for our little. We're too small to get in there. And all of a sudden, some dude that's, like, across the street who's power washing his fence comes over with the power washer. And. And because of that, he. He's able to put the thing out with the power washer. But he literally tells us. He's like, get out of here. Get out of here now. And we fucking ran. And then, like, that was a whole case. He never told. We never told. And it was just a big mystery. Who the fuck set Joyce's house on fire?

[Top]

Did he ever go back and pull her weeds?

[David]

Yeah, I looked at her pussy, too. It was crazy.

[Top]

That was after.

[David]

Yeah, probably, I think so.

[Top]

It's crazy.

[David]

It is crazy.

[Top]

That is nuts. All right, whatever. Here we go. So after the trailer burned down, my father shipped me off to go live with my mother and my two siblings in Ohio while he figured out a permanent living situation. For both of us. He was staying with different friends for an extended amount of time. I don't recall too much of the Ohio experience other than fireflies, fireflies, tornadoes, and being bullied by my brother's friends. So I think this is a guy. They probably bullied you because your name's Dakota.

[David]

Yeah, it's a girl's name.

[Top]

Yeah. But something that sticks out to me is our apartment that my mother lived in at the time burned down after about six months of me living there. Now, to me, I recall a completely different story than what my siblings remember of how the accident happened. This person is bad luck. Maybe you're an arsonist.

[David]

Yeah, that's what it sounds like. Sounds like you. You're one of those kids that fucking really likes fire.

[Top]

Maybe you burned his shit down. I don't know. It was the middle of the summer. My brother and his. His friend that for some reason treated me like an absolute, absolute dog water. Well, in my memory, I recall this one day, I got so angry with how he was treating me and not including me into. In the various things that they would do that I set his house on fire. This is you, man. So he.

[David]

Charcoal briquettes and fucking.

[Top]

You broke into this person's apartment on the bottom floor through a window and threw some papers onto his stove and turned it on. What the fuck, dude?

[David]

You did do this. This is your fault. You're an arsonist.

[Top]

I'm not even sure how a child that's maybe 7 years old could fathom to do something like this, but a couple hours later. A couple hours later, everyone was rushing out of the building. News came out later that night, and the fire department stated that the fire was determined to be an electrical issue on the third floor that caused it.

[David]

So you just fucking. That's a little peek into the fact that firefighters just be making shit up, huh?

[Top]

Why did you do that? Holy shit.

[David]

That lady, by the way. So. So we hung out with the crowd. You know, I was probably like 11. No, no, I was going into. I was going into high school, So I was 13. And some of the kids were as young as, like 10 or 11. And then some of the kids were as old as like 16, 17. And we just had like this big crew of miscreants and. And those older kids, when she wasn't home, they would break in to her house and. And bang on her bed.

[Top]

Damn.

[David]

Yeah. Diabolical. Diabolical behavior.

[Top]

That is crazy, dude. See, that's why you get. Can't live next to this stuff. Can't Live next to it.

[David]

In fact, one of those chicks that got banged in that bed, she. She was much older than me. Gave me a lap dance when I was a child. And I was. I was like horrified by it because I could smell her butt and vagina through her pajama pants. I got. I got a. I was. I was. I'm sorry, this is just. My mind is just spiraling now, but I was somewhere yesterday, where was I? And a woman walked by me, and I. I was. I was sat down where the was.

[Top]

I could smell her butt and vagina through her pants.

[David]

Yeah, well, she was white trash, you know, like a dirty. Like a dirty. So, yeah, I was. I was like all up about it. I was like, oh, God. And. And I was actually. I think at this time I was probably like 12. But whoever I was yesterday. And it's actually really upsetting me that I can't remember it. Oh, I was at the barbershop. My son's getting a haircut. Woman walks in and she's got like crazy cheeseburger ass. You know, like an older lady with cheeseburger ass where it's just like. It's. I can't even explain it. It's just like.

[Top]

It's all.

[David]

It's when your hips are so wide that it does like a giant wobble. Those kind of old ladies.

[Top]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[David]

And she. I was looking down at my phone and I'm sat down, so when she passes by, my head is ass level. Dude, when I tell you I smelled like fish oil. Like fish oil. She walked by me and I got. And I went like it was ass and fish oil. Crazy. And I said, oh, this poor old lady, she can't wash her, because she probably can't, but please take that deep.

[Top]

Yeah, I mean, your arms. It becomes a point where your arms can't even reach that deeply in the crack.

[David]

What are you supposed to do? How are you supposed to have sex? I don't know. I don't know.

[Top]

You don't. You don't. You've lost your ability. Not your ability, but your self respect to have sex. If men had any self respect, they wouldn't do it. But yeah, this is out here wild.

[David]

Like a cheeseburger.

[Top]

Cheeseburger ass and fish pussy.

[David]

Cheeseburger ass and fish pussy. Thank you very much.

[Top]

All right, so this guy burned down an entire apartment complex. Or girl. Could it have been a false memory that I've been holding on to for some odd reason and really wasn't my fault? No, it was you, dude.

[David]

Oh, because he's saying he has the memory of throwing things on the burner, but they're saying that it was a electrical issue on the third.

[Top]

Oh, right. Yeah. I don't know. It's hard. Listen, when you get into, like, the pathology of fire or fire, like a fire science, people think that they have it nailed down, but it's so chaotic in there. I.

[David]

It is.

[Top]

It's. That's actually my. My major in college. Fire science, Fire protection and management. And I, I like you quickly could tell, like, they're like, oh, look at that. Look at that end. Take.

[David]

Sorry, I was just. Yeah, go on.

[Top]

The people like, yeah, yeah, we know the source of the fire and we could actually track it. And like, this is chaos in here. Like, when you see the scenes, like, this is fucking chaos.

[David]

Like, you can tell being on the inside. Do you think that it's easy for. For firefighters to determine the source of a fire, or do you think they just be saying, shit, it's difficult.

[Top]

I mean, they could find clues. You can find things. But like, there could have been an electrical fire that started from the original fire that you caused.

[David]

Right, right, right, exactly. Like, one thing leads to another. Now all of a sudden it looks like it came from your Xbox. Not the case.

[Top]

Shit starts to blow up. Like. Yeah, you don't know what goes on. You can. You can definitely see where fire comes from. But to tell exactly what started, I think it's a little more difficult than they.

[David]

It's interesting because those things are utilized in court.

[Top]

Yeah, they. They do. They do use that. Not just in corporal, like insurance. I think it's. A lot of it is to just get insurance companies. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I'm not so sure. Like, as we. As we learn more even about, like, DNA, they're like, oh, well, there's actually DNA evidence. I'm like, first off, you didn't have it for a long time. Now you have DNA evidence. And now we're finding out that's not really that accurate all the time.

[David]

So after the PCR test, when I learned that you can. In any sample of anything, if you look hard enough, you will find traces of virtually every single element or, or. Or, you know, molecular compound on earth. Then that's. That's not good. That doesn't seem reliable.

[Top]

Exactly. And now you're talking about tracing back, like, the most destructive force in nature, which is fire. It's either water or fire. And fire is the thing that basically just deletes everything in its way. I mean, you're going to give a sacrifice to God. You burn it, this goes up. It's like dissipated.

[David]

It's gone. Gone.

[Top]

It's gone. That shit is gone. Whatever. All right, so it could have been a false memory. No, you burned it down. He says I don't have the slightest clue. Shortly after this, I moved back home with my father.

[David]

And then my father set on fire. And. I don't know, was that my fault?

[Top]

Spontaneously combusted. All right. High school. I started to smoke weed in the summer, going from eighth grade to ninth grade. My whole family at this point in time were all smoking. And it just kind of fell into my lap. At the age of 14, I've already picked up several burglary charges. This is a guy.

[David]

Damn. At 14. Yeah. Yeah. With women, with girls, you got to worry about them getting pregnant. With boys, you got to worry about them going to jail.

[Top]

Yeah, it's like one path or the other. So I was already on the, the track to being a career criminal. My house became the trap house. Figuratively speaking, was a nice neighborhood, but. But we were the odd ones out due to my parents being deaf and my dad collecting a social, Social Security checks in order to afford the rent payments. My parents being deaf, what's that mean? Like they literally couldn't hear.

[David]

Those are people that I, by the way, I warn my son about is when you go to your friend's house when you're older, if he has cool parents, if it, if they say things like, you can watch the thing over here that you can't watch at your house, or if you get a little bit older, like 16, 17, 18, and they're telling you you can smoke in this house. I'd rather you do it here than on the streets. Get the fuck out of here. Don't ever fall. Don't let your kids fall for the cool parents. Because that's. Those are the predatory parents. And that's also the places where shit happens. I've. I've hung out in those places. You want to know where 16 year olds are fucking and getting teen pregnancy shit in those houses, the cool mom's house, the cool dad's house, that, those parents, that, man, I, I really am not a fan of that type of. I've been around them a lot. I spent my childhood in those houses and only as an adult do I look back and realize, oh yeah, there seems to be a pattern where cool parents, you know, trap house parents, whatever, they're the ones where all the kids who were spiraling at that time, they've grown up they, they. They don't have jobs. They're in jail, Whatever the case may be. Yeah, 100%. The cool parents are not what you. You don't want to have them, and you don't want to spend time with people who have that. I know. It's alluring because as a teenager, you're like, I don't got shit to do.

[Top]

Where.

[David]

Where can I be? Where can I hang out? And there's always some cool parent that's like, you can hang out here, you can smoke here. You can look at my pussy like that. That's what happens. That's how it goes. It goes. You can hang out here. You could smoke weed here. Hey, look at my pussy. That's exactly how that goes.

[Top]

Do you know who was the cool parents? My cousin's mother. Not like, look at my pussy, cool parents, but like, hold on a second.

[David]

Hold on a second. Hold on a second, bro. Curtis said, funny my mom would let us drink at home. Oh, yeah. She fucked one of my friends. There you go. There you go. I don't lie to you guys. I'm not here to lie to you guys. I'm a pattern recognizer. Fuck cool parents. And I don't mean it literally, because they were apparently.

[Top]

Yeah, any. Anyway, it's either. It's either they're going to fuck your friends or. Well, my aunt was the cool house where she let them. Like, the kids would go and smoke in the basement and do whatever. But this house was severely haunted. It was almost like she's. She was like. Like fostering all this bad, juvenile energy in the house. I don't even know if she knew what she was doing. But you wonder why. This was, like, extremely haunted. I was like, yeah, that's why. Because your house.

[David]

Those are. Those are parents who do that. I'm your friend, and they want to remain your friend. And then when you. You know, there's a natural detachment that happens when you're a teenager.

[Top]

You.

[David]

You fall away from your.

[Top]

That's why I tell my kids. I tell my kids right away. I was like, I don't like you.

[David]

Like, that's right. I'm not giving you anything. I'm not your friend. I don't even think you're funny.

[Top]

Yeah, you're lucky I let you live here.

[David]

You're lucky I let you live. But I'm serious, though. I do think there's something the. It's the Oedipal mother, right where, like, she wants to baby you. She wants to be your friend. She doesn't want to be mom, necessarily. And then what? That hat. What that means then is she is the facilitator of all the. That will be your downfall in your teenage years. And that's. That's a huge problem. And then you suck your friends into it, and then she sucks your friends off. It's fucking not good.

[Top]

Crazy. It's a vicious circle.

[David]

Yeah.

[Top]

All right, so let's see where we at. So his house was the cool house. His parents were deaf. They couldn't hear shit going on, so they were just doing whatever they wanted there. My brother would sell weed to all the high school kids, and they'd come over to my place to smoke. We turned our garage into the smoke spot. Lined with couches and a coffee table. Throughout my high school years, I started experiment. Yeah, yeah, right.

[David]

With.

[Top]

So he's experimenting with various drugs, primarily Xanax, perks, and Adderall. It's psychedelics. Mushrooms, acid, salvia. And at the age of 15, I started to jockey box. I don't know what the fuck that is.

[David]

Jockey box. Is that euphemism for jerking off?

[Top]

I don't know. That's where I would wake up at midnight and go hit the surrounding neighborhoods and looked for. For unlock cars.

[David]

Okay, me too.

[Top]

Criminal activity.

[David]

I used to do the exact same thing. Yeah, we.

[Top]

Shit, dude.

[David]

There's some shit that. I'm not sure the statute of limitations on that I'm not even gonna mention here, but we got some shit from some cars. What'd you get, man? I don't know. I don't know if I could say it.

[Top]

I mean, at this point, is anyone reporting this?

[David]

That's true. And this is just. This is actually. In Minecraft, we found a. An unlocked police cruiser.

[Top]

Oh, yeah, let's not say that. That's. That's probably not past the statute of limitations, but I'm sure you.

[David]

We just found one. It was there. I didn't do. I didn't say we did anything to it.

[Top]

We set it on fire, dog.

[David]

You just found it. And we found some stuff in it. All right.

[Top]

That's where I would wake up at midnight to open up a police cruiser is insane.

[David]

Yeah.

[Top]

It's insane to even see it and then touch it.

[David]

Yeah. It's insane what we found in it.

[Top]

I want to know. I want to know, all right. There's a dead body. It's a dead hooker in the trunk.

[David]

All I know is there. There had to have been an officer released from the force. That's all I know. Somebody had to have. There had to Be some fucking disciplinary action there.

[Top]

Okay, so.

[David]

Awesome. Shit.

[Top]

Sometimes until the early break of dawn, crossing several miles of ground, he sees opening car. Yeah.

[David]

Yep.

[Top]

Each time I did that, I would. One time, I was in my dad's car with my girlfriend in the middle of the night doing some stuff, and somebody did that. They opened the door and I. Yeah, they opened the door, but I was in the back seat and I fucking swung at them and. But they. They, like, backed up. Close the door, and just ran away.

[David]

Because they're run away.

[Top]

They were just there to steal shit, you know?

[David]

You know how bad we were. So. So we would pull some handles and the alarm would go off, and then we would run. We'd sprint like, I don't know, maybe half a mile away. And then we just continue.

[Top]

Yeah.

[David]

So it was like, if you. If you were lucky enough to be on the block that had an alarm, at least we wouldn't hit your block. We'd run. But then we would just pick it up just, you know, a few blocks away and just continue. I mean. Yeah, we found some shit, man.

[Top]

Crazy shit. All right. All right, here we go. Where are we at? So into the early breaker dome. Each time we did that, I would get this feeling that over overtook me. It's hard to explain, but it's just like I was alive when I would do it. Yeah. It's called adrenaline.

[David]

Yeah.

[Top]

I started to fall behind in school, sleeping in class, and really only looking forward to the next high I was gonna get and the next crime I was gonna commit. At 16, the paranormal came back. Or at least I started to see it more often. It started with what we called the death chair. Fuck. All right, read from here. This is. I have a feeling it's gonna get good.

[David]

Z Man has a good point, though. Your car is the public service announcement. Your car is not your holster, guys.

[Top]

It's not a holster. Take that with you.

[David]

Okay. Did you highlight it for me? I'm retarded.

[Top]

Right here. My mother gave us a chair that she received from a friend.

[David]

Okay. My mother gave us a chair that she received from a friend. It was like a throne. And we treated it like one. First into the garage, would be able to sit on it, and we would always get. Oh. And they would always get the first hit of whatever we were doing that night. That's great. So that's what the throne gets you, is the first bump or the first pull. It would always be either my sister or myself. Rarely would someone beat us there. Over the course of a few months, we Started to notice that the people who would come over there weren't regulars to the garage. Oh, I'm sorry. Those people who weren't regulars to the garage would experience a wave of sickness, go pale white, and feel like they were having difficulties breathing with increased heart rate, and only while they were sitting in this chair. Damn. We reached out to our mother and asked where she obtained this chair from, and she stated that it was from the depths of hell and she had sacrificed a newborn to achieve it. She says it was from a friend who.

[Top]

She said it like this. It was from a friend.

[David]

It was from a friend who suffered, who passed away by a heart attack in that chair. What the. Dude.

[Top]

Damn.

[David]

Why would you.

[Top]

What.

[David]

What discernment do you lack that you're like, I'm gonna bring the dead chair into the house. That's a crazy decision. I mean, that's fucking. Even if you're collecting spooky stuff like, damn, man, that's a far cry. So we named it the death chair. And any newcomers who would come by, we would provide the lore, and then we would see if they wanted to try and beat the death. Okay, So I guess it's like, hey, sit in this chair and see if you can overcome getting pale and sickly and nauseous and anxious. One time, I remember very well, this kid named Jimbo. Never met a fucking kid named Jimbo. I swear to God, I thought they just made those as adults. I've never met a child named Jimbo. I thought it just men over 50.

[Top]

You earned that name.

[David]

Yeah, you earned that name. Your name is Jim. Jimothy. Whatever. And then fucking after. After you reach a certain age, you get the suffix bo. Jimbo came over and started to experience the symptoms above, but he was a bit more unique. He blacked out and his eyes rolled to the back of his head. And when he came to a few seconds later, he said he was getting visions of killing his cousin who was in the room with us. Oh, that's not good. Don't kill your cousin. And also probably stop. I don't know. I mean, I guess up until something really spooky happens, this is all very fun. You're doing drugs and you have the Ouija board of chairs in your garage. And so I could see how if you're. If you're retarded and you don't have information yet, this could be fun. From that point, we decided it was best to move the chair into storage and replace it with camping chairs. Okay. We were freaked out by. It could have been the drugs that made these people sick, with all of us being pretty young but doing a lot of different shit. But it's hard to think that as I reflect back on those times. During this time, I slept in a den room that was at the back of the house. I would hear footsteps leading from the front door on multiple occasions to the opposite side of the house where my sister and dad slept. House would be completely empty, and no one was home besides myself. Each time, I felt like there was a presence that reminds me of that last story we read where that reptilian is stomping around this dude's house and leaving prints inside of his carpet.

[Top]

Right? Right.

[David]

Good. Eventually, my sister moved out and I overtook her room. This is where the Elmo doll resurfaced. I've told you guys I had a haunted Elmo doll. We threw it at the back of the stairs or the bottom of the stairs. My mom used to get expensive toys for dogs and. And even though the batteries were at. Were out of it, it would be at the bottom of the basement stairs going, ha ha ha.

[Top]

That tickles.

[David]

Horrifying, dude. My friend found it and tucked it away behind my dresser in the corner of my closet and clowned me for having it. I told him it wasn't mine, and I don't even remember where it came from. Each day for two weeks, I would throw the doll into the living room, and it would appear back in my room the next day in a random location, sometimes behind the dresser, sometimes by the window, but it always came back. After a little while, I started to think someone was playing a prank on me, and it was just utterly fucking with me. One night, I had four friends over. We were getting high on some Xanax.

[Top]

Fucking Jesus, why not?

[David]

And a little bit of Adderall. What is the. Dude, make up your mind. Do you want to be asleep, or do you want to be really awake? What is that?

[Top]

Like, I want to be dead.

[David]

I want to be somewhere in between. Limbo is where I'd like to be. Adderall and Xanax. That's a wild combination. My wife and I did unisoms and Adderall once, so I guess I can't really, because it was like. The point was, the Adderall was supposed to keep you awake, but the unisoms was supposed to shut your body down and put you in a state of, like, waking sleep. And it did just that. I saw a lot of shit. I saw panthers.

[Top]

Damn.

[David]

And I saw light that would not dissipate. So if I took My phone and I turned the light on and I streaked it across your face. It would leave a tangible streak of light that both you and I could see and we could explore it in like three dimensional space. Very strange.

[Top]

I don't know if. Do you, do you ever remember taking Jack3D as like a pre workout?

[David]

I thought those were doritos.

[Top]

No, no, jack3d was a pre workout for. They made it illegal because it killed a bunch of people. But.

[David]

What?

[Top]

Yeah, yeah, it was really. The original formula was. I mean, I would take that and then in the gym, I mean, veins like all the way through my neck. You see everything in my body. You're just like, yeah, it was great, but I wouldn't be able to sleep. Like, I would take it at 6pm and then you can't sleep. And I remember being chased by like jaguars specifically, but like superhuman jaguars. It was a consistent thing to the point where I stopped taking it. Not because of like, yo, wait a.

[David]

Second, dude, you're taking pre workout and you're seeing jaguars?

[Top]

Well, when you try to sleep, yeah, it's like you're. It felt like I was sleeping with my eyes open, if that makes any sense. Like you just cannot sleep and you're being chased by like a jaguar like creature. But I just remember that from a long time. That's why I stopped taking it. Like, you would have heart palpitations, you would have like all kinds of going on. But the, the effect of it was worth it. Like I was, I was lifting. Like, lifting. It's just like getting chased by the Jaguars was just too much. So I stopped.

[David]

I can understand how that could be. If anything fucks in my sleep, I have a real hard time for it. Where did this guy. Somebody just said, oh, Marnie says she used to do Xanax and meth. Good. Wow, Marnie, that's incredible. You're fucking overachieving. You're just trying to show off.

[Top]

Marnie, I see the type of woman that listens.

[David]

That's what I'm talking about. We're like, who is this? The woman that listens? Who are the 20% of our female audience? And it's like meth and Z enjoyers, damaged people.

[Top]

These are people that are the men.

[David]

Yes. Yeah, they're all. Well, we all are. I'm, I'm as up as they are. But it's like, I like people who were thrown into hell and who like looked around for a little bit and was like, this is crazy. And then maybe even decided like, I can hang out for A while, and then eventually decided to come, you know, crawl out of it. I. I really like that. All right, where the hell were we? I was. I was talking and. I don't know.

[Top]

You had Xanax and a little bit of Addie right here.

[David]

Oh, yeah. Playing some Call of Duty when one of the friends found the doll. That's a great time. Xanax, Adderall, Call of Duty. I told my buddy to throw the doll outside into our front yard. A few hours later on this, one of the girls we were with said there was a man out front with a large black dog standing on the sidewalk staring at our house with the Elmo at his feet. A man with a large black dog. I like this. This is reminding me of the hellhound stories from the confessionals, but one in particular, where a man and his siblings found Dracula on a mountain.

[Top]

Oh, yes, the large dog.

[David]

Yeah. When. When Dracula was no longer in the coffin, he was seen dressed in all black with a big black dog. That's fascinating. He picked up. Picked it up.

[Top]

The.

[David]

The Elmo. He picked it up and placed it by our mailbox. We all witnessed this happen. Keep in mind, it's like 2am the next morning, it's gone. Later that night, it's back in my room.

[Top]

Whoa.

[David]

We lit it on fire and joked that if it came back, we knew it was haunted. You probably fucking had a pretty good indicator before that. And he says it never showed back up. That's crazy, though.

[Top]

Problem is, like, when you burn those effigies, where does whatever was inside of it, where does that go? Like, it's been released now, you know?

[David]

And are you sacrificing it.

[Top]

This person? I mean, live by the fire, die by the fire. Right, Right.

[David]

Well, it inhabits an inanimate object, and then you burn that inanimate object and you free the spirit. Well, I imagine it was, like, relatively free before it inhabited the object.

[Top]

Right.

[David]

I don't know how that works, but what happens to the spirit that's inside.

[Top]

That goes into you? Maybe. I don't know. So about a month, shortly after I turned 17, I get this urge to go jockey boxing. It was calling me. I started at my usual time in my usual places, but this time it felt like a trance. After going through roughly a few hundred cars, I was coming up short. I felt this rage build inside of me, and I lit the next five cars on fire that I had access to. What the fuck? Three exploded completely and two had minor damages.

[David]

Wow.

[Top]

That is crazy. Yeah, dude, this is. This is you You're a pyromaniac. My friend who was on house arrest at the time, lived in the neighborhood and happened to witness the last car explode and ran to their house to wake up the family before they ended up engulfed in flames.

[David]

Wow. I can killed his.

[Top]

His homies, Yomo, your homies, neighbors. Yeah. I continued on my path, and I ended up stealing a gun from a car. A month later, I have atf, my probation officer, and some plainclothes police at my door looking to speak with me. I ended up admitting to committing the arsons after several hours of being interrogated and spent the next four years in prison.

[David]

Holy shit.

[Top]

Worst time of my life. Fuck.

[David]

I got bragging rights over him, Dakota. They wrapped me up at 17 or 18 for a drug deal that went bad and ended up in a stabbing. And they kept us for like six hours. And. And we never broke. We never broke. We got out of there. I thought I was going to prison. We got out of there, and then when they posted it in the news, it just said, edison, New Jersey, man robbed at knifepoint for his wallet. That's not what he was robbed for, but, yeah, that was. That was a fucking really scary time. That was probably the scariest experience I've ever had, and that did not make me feel like my soul was in mortal danger. All right. Even the scariest things don't give you that feeling that sleep paralysis does.

[Top]

Damn. All right. Since being out of prison, I've met a wonderful woman whose family showed me the word of God, and my life has changed drastically. I've repented for the sins I've committed and the people I hurt at 30 years old. 30 years old now I'm happy to know Jesus Christ and the blessings he has graciously given me. There's a gap between meeting this woman and me being released from prison that involves a psychedelic bender. Some meth. Some meth use. Accident.

[David]

It's an accident. He didn't mean to use a method.

[Top]

Yeah. And the shadow people. You smoked meth by accident? I guess.

[David]

Ah, so this one is accidental meth use in black people.

[Top]

If you'd like to hear this portion, please let me know and I'll send another email. Hell, yeah. Stay. Dakota. Yes, Dakota. Dakota's our pen pal. Please send us another email about that. That portion. Very interesting story.

[David]

He's. Man, I really do have an affinity. You know why? Because these people never take on a holier than thou, you know, Persona. They never act like they're better than you. Like, I like people who have gone through the ringer and who, you know, for all intents and purposes should be disregarded by society. But then all of a sudden they have something valuable to contribute which is their testimony or, or otherwise. I love that. I love that. Those are, those are my people. That's. I really enjoy them. Much more so than that. Holier than thou buttoned up Christian.

[Top]

This is our audience, I suppose, like, I wonder a lot of the times where it's like, oh, you know, oh, actually let's read this. I'll read this email really quickly.

[David]

Okie dokie.

[Top]

And then we'll, we'll end it. But this one here is in the Chronicles email. This is from somebody named Religious Doctor. Her name is Cheryl. Cheryl says, what was that?

[David]

I said, what's her last name?

[Top]

Yeah, well, I'm not going to say your last name. But she goes, hi, I happen to find your show and was happy to listen until the F bomb and other curses. The F bomb when we said fuck, okay. Or faggot.

[David]

It could be either one, but go.

[Top]

On Philander, I don't know. And other curses started to consume the conversation. I listened to Blurry Creatures and we know prophecy watchers, etc. I don't even know the rest of those shows. Love the subjects and your podcast piqued my interest. Sorry to say I can't deal with the language. Even though I like your subjects. Respectfully, Cheryl. And then I said, it's not.

[David]

Now wait, wait. Whatever you say next. I just wanted. She did say respectfully.

[Top]

Yeah.

[David]

So there's that.

[Top]

Respectfully. This is not, it's not right. Star Crimes. Don't say that.

[David]

Come on, Star.

[Top]

So I just answered her. It's not for everyone. Those are some great shows. Even though I don't know the other two. Thanks for your interest. And then she says, thank you for your quick response. So that's our last one of our latest listener submissions, I suppose. Even though they must have listened to like half an episode and said, these guys say nigger way too much. I just can't do it. Yeah, you're not wrong. But it's not for you. This is for drug addled retards like Dakota.

[David]

Yeah.

[Top]

Who have girls names.

[David]

That's what I'm saying. Whatever we're doing here. A boy named Sue. Whatever we're doing here is. It brings me a lot of satisfaction, a lot of joy because I am making content that I want to make and I am making content that I would listen to. And you imagine then that there are other people like me. If you're like me, then you would feel the same way. You go, oh, this is good content. I want to listen to it in that way. You're like me. If you're like me at all, then maybe you did do stupid. Maybe you did smoke this and take that and go to jail. And you know what I mean? Like, and so I'm attracting. We're attracting a crowd that is literally like. It's, you know, a huge portion of it is. Is people that went through the same that I went through. So if I wanted to make a. A product that was for everybody, then maybe I would make like, I'm not. I'm not on these people at all, but maybe I would make like blurry creatures or. Or the confessionals. And these guys are very worried about the language that they use and. And they're marketing this thing towards as a family product, which it is. And it's a great product. But they have that covered. They already have that. I am only doing whatever you've come here and you found distasteful or whatever you've come here and you found enjoyable. It is all genuine. All we're doing is talking about the things that we want to talk about to the people that we want to hear. That's it. Yeah, Nothing. Nothing complicated here.

[Top]

I will say. I'll do a little rejoinder. In the Patreon. I had asked if it. If people would find it useful if they got the version. The audio version of these episodes without the curses or the slurs, like. And the reason I said that is not because of people like Cheryl, because she's offended by the notion of it being used. Even if you used, you know, intelligent, sparkly language to say these words rather than. Yeah, it's about the insinuation. It's the idea that we're going there, that we are pointing at a certain thing, I guess, telling the truth in a certain way. So even if I did block out the words for her, it wouldn't matter. That was more for, like, if you're listening in your. Yeah. Your children are not going to put together the context clues of, like, some of these slurs that we're saying, but they also won't hear them to be able to repeat them. That might make you more comfortable. Most people were like, just fucking do your show. They, like.

[David]

The adult people got mad at. Some people are like, what are you doing? Why are you censoring? It's like, no, no, no, don't worry. We're not going to actively censor. We're gonna have an AI, go back and clean up what we said just so that your children don't have to hear faggot.

[Top]

And it would also have been like, it wouldn't have been instead of. It would have been also so you could listen to this or that. But honestly, it's a lot of work and the amount of shit that you guys gave me, I don't think I want to do it now. So.

[David]

But there are those places, though. There is a confessionals. There is a blurry creatures. These are shows that I myself enjoy. And I don't look at them and go, like, look at these faggots. They didn't say nigger. Like, I don't feel that way at all.

[Top]

He's like, but they thought it. But they thought it.

[David]

They thought it that whenever they, Whenever I know they're thinking it, but they don't say it that way. They lose when that happens.

[Top]

Just say what you're thinking. What's the point of having a podcast if you can't say what you're thinking?

[David]

That's it. So. So, yeah, to those people that find this distasteful, I understand. And you're not wrong. I used to eat trash out of the dumpster, so this is a lot better than what I used to do. And I just can't. You know, there's a lot of people that want you to be like this, this kind of upstanding Christian character. And, and it's like, even if I do become that, it doesn't happen all at once. You want me to just snap my fingers and, and behave differently because I knew I now have a different set of rules that I have to adhere to. Like, I'm. I'm retarded. It's going to take me some time.

[Top]

So, like, that the canary coal mine guy, he's like, aren't you guys a Christian? Like, aren't you guys Christians? How could you tell me to just go and shove my opinion of my. I was like, well, aren't you a schizophrenic retard? Like, why am I supposed to. Like, I don't know. You're holding me up to certain standards, but you're allowed to be a. Just a complete lunatic.

[David]

And also the very Christianity that, that we adhere to is something you find distasteful, abhorrent, and incorrect. So you don't even respect this thing that you're trying to weaponize against me? Like, you.

[Top]

Yeah, you don't respect it at all that I just, I correct people. Like, being a Christian means that I believe Jesus Christ came and died for our sins. He's the son of God, sits at the right hand of the throne, and he resurrected after three days. That's what being a Christian means. I say bad words, you get offended at it. I don't really know what to tell you, dude. Especially. Especially those people, the ones that like, like to. It's like they're. They're trying to fight you with a handicap, you know?

[David]

Yes, that's exactly. They want you to stop beating their ass. Like. Like tie one hand behind your back. This is an unfair fight. And it's like, oh, you know, how.

[Top]

About I just keep punching you? And they're like, but that's not quite Christian. I was like, well, neither are you. So now we're playing by the same rules. How does it feel?

[David]

Yeah.

[Top]

And it's funny, that guy hasn't said shit to me in a couple of days because I've thoroughly embarrassed him.

[David]

Well, that's what keeps happening, is these people keep coming for us, and they assume that we're some sort of shill or some sort of fed. And then. And then all you find is like, we're just potty mouths.

[Top]

Yeah.

[David]

Oh, very boring. Very gay. And instead of moving on, being reasonable, you just decide to double down. Now you go, all right, I didn't find what I was looking for. Maybe General Flynn isn't paying for your events, but I did find out that you have a proclivity for the word faggot. And I'm now. And it's like, that's not even as potent as General Flynn.

[Top]

That's what he did. He looked every time I said gay on Twitter. And, I mean, I could imagine what he found literally every other tweet. And he's like, look at this. And I was like, yep, I said that. Like, how about this one? I was like, cold. My co host. Gay, too. Yeah.

[David]

I call myself gay. It's. I don't know. These people are retarded. But, you know, I. Sometimes I think we spend too much time on that, because the truth of the matter is, there are thousands of people who enjoy this show. We're talking about a vocal minority of retards. Actual retards, right? Not. Not people that are pushing against the status quo. We're talking about people that are spiraling that, you know, have that sort of paranoid schizophrenic lean and have latched on to us, but they represent.01% of.

[Top]

Of.

[David]

Of our fan base. And then there's. There's this massive body of people who enjoy what we're doing. But just like them, when I listen to a good episode of Tinfoil Hat, I don't go, hey, Sam Tripley, keep up the good work. I don't do that. I listen to it and I go, that was a fucking banger. And I keep it moving, right? And so normal people, they don't say those things. There's a huge percentage of people that enjoy what we do. And it's evident by the success that we've had. And sometimes I think we just get caught up on the very small minority of retards out there.

[Top]

This is actually interesting. Nether Knight is telling me to look up brood of vipers in Greek. And what it means, I don't know. I wonder. Can you just tell us that Nether.

[David]

Knight spoiled it for us. We're too retarded to do all that typing and stuff like that.

[Top]

Yeah, I know. Now I have to Google this. What does that mean? Yeah, I have the Greek word for this. I have to copy paste it. Thanks a lot, Nedler Knight.

[David]

You see this one?

[Top]

This is.

[David]

This is the U2. That was the promo for when we went to the movies in 1999.

[Top]

It's beautiful.

[David]

Handed these out and I got that thing right there. Isn't that nice?

[Top]

I guess he's not going to tell.

[David]

Us before we get out of here.

[Top]

We're waiting.

[David]

We're waiting now, now. The Nether Night. We simply cannot leave. We're gonna stay here. I. I just realized that we've gone a whole show and Nancy never showed up for work. Wow, that's crazy. A whole show. No call, no show. Disciplines are going to be taken.

[Top]

It says the fruits of viper. What's that mean?

[David]

The fruits of viper? Gay vipers.

[Top]

Are they calling them gay?

[David]

Gay snakes? The fruits of vipers.

[Top]

I don't know what that means. Nethernite, message us. We'll see you guys later.

[David]

Okay. Oh, wait, guys. Oh, what? Brogrow.com. get your tickets?

[Top]

Yeah, go to Brogrove.com if you haven't already. They're already. Almost. Almost gone. Almost gone. But there are. I think I'm going to open up a few more. Like I said, maybe seven more. Because we have. There's 28. The problem here is there's 28 VIP tickets. We have to save space in the. In the restaurant to make sure that we have enough for the content creators that are going to come and the VIP people. So I think seven more will be good.

[David]

Maybe. Maybe we could do that. I love gin. She goes, nancy's working a job. Yeah, I don't know what the acronym is, but I do think it's funny that j. O. B. Actually getting paid.

[Top]

Yeah, good for you, Nancy.

[David]

Dude, think metaphors. The nether night. You really got to spell it out for us. We're fucking retarded. It's. It's not good. All right, guys, Brogrve.com. go and get your tickets and watch tower gang tonight. Is that it? That's all we got.

[Top]

That's it. The greatest hypnotist on planet earth is a oblong box in the corner of the room.

[David]

It is constantly telling us what to believe is real.

[Top]

You can persuade us that what they.

[David]

See with their eyes is what there.

[Top]

Is to see on, because they'll in the face of an explanation that portrays the bigger picture of what's happening, and they have.