Austin Picard (34:52)
Right. I mean, I find. I found it so interesting. And that also kind of reminds me that I do value, like, let's say culture jamming for an example. You know, I. I always thought it was valuable because at least it. It forcefully removes the veil for some people. And I appreciate that because it does move the needle in a positive direction. But then I wonder, you know, how much of a consequential outcome of like the, The. The polar opposite is. Is kind of reinforcing these bad ideas in a certain way because it's misinterpreted, but not that that robs it of its value. I just think that this is, you know, this is the name of the game, man. We're dealing with kind of like mental midgets at a certain level. You know what I mean? Like, they're at this very low frequency of their interpretation and, and ability to critically think through these, these ideas and is, is due to this lack of self discipline and, and sort of like, you know, committing yourself to, to just one growing as a person, as an, as an individual. I think that in itself, it's like you better be actively pursuing that on a daily basis in, in your conscious mind, in the forefront, you know, remind yourself what's most important because I think knowing who I am personally, it's a slippery slope, my friend. You know, like one bad decision leads to the next, and, and then I've become a monster. And I mean, that happens to people. And, and I feel like once I had to. I had substance abuse issues in my past when I was a younger person. And, and you know, it, it forced me. It forced me to reflect on the decisions I had made and the person I had become. And I, I kind of. There's a moment I'll never forget, man. Like my straight up. I was addicted to opiates for a while, right? And, and essentially, man, just looking for a fix at every level, you know, facing, you know, just sort of consequences that, you know, I deserved. But at the same time, it was just like, man, to see the collateral damage, right, that, that you cause. And, and my man, I mean, I've done things that, that make just. It makes it difficult to, to really love yourself at any level, you know what I mean? Because you kind of have, that you have to come to terms with your character defects and the, the mistakes you've made in your past, but to what level you can kind of like set that aside and, and remove your baggage at the door. It's always a difficult task, you know, and I think that there's a moment I'll never forget. And you know, my mom, she. She looked at me once and I was just desperate for a fix in the moment and, and acting a fool, you know, and, and she just looked at me, man, and she's. Tears in her eyes, you know, who are you? I don't even recognize you anymore. And, and it's just like, thank God. Thank God that I had the ability to climb out of that, you know, darkness because it was like I saw so many people never get out, you know, and like, just going through recovery and, and seeing like, yeah, just the ultimate toll and how some people just might not have the ability to climb back out from, from, from that pit of hell that they put themselves in. And I think that people need to remind themselves this is why you surround yourself with, with people who who, who drive you to be a better person and to improve at every level. And, and you know, I think that it's really, you know, once, once you understand that that's what matters most of all. Right. Is that. Is that you're consistently hoping to, to at least. You know, I, I think that one, it's, it's sort of just as far as like I'm very blessed to have married a woman that, that, that definitely brings the best out in me in many ways. Right. And she's sort of like drives me to be a better person. And I think that, you know, you sort of need that in your life at least some. Definitely some people do. I don't know. I agree that applies to everyone, but for me personally, absolutely it does. And, and, but I'm very grateful ultimately at the end of the day that I went through all of that and, and you know, because sincerely I, I was, I was forced to grapple with you know, the sort of. Just when it comes to actually having these, these kind of psychological demons, you know, it really does become that. And I think that, man, that was when I was researching Project Monarch and, and basically the roots of, of trauma based mind control, you know. Yeah. I basically just discovered that really there's, it's so strange when, when you figure out that that Monarch itself was, was really kind of like obviously if you're considering the origin of Monarch, it's. It seems to have been human honey pots utilizing child prostitutes, obviously. But as far as, like, I just think that understanding that there's this sort of interesting as far as. In my opinion, I think that people don't understand how loose of a grip they have on free will in general. You know, and, and what I found is that there was, there's legitimately a history of Project Monarch where they talk about demonic possession being the altars in the dissociative identity disorder equation. And I was starting to like, made me uncomfortable. It was very unsettling reading through it and because truly it made me consider that this is possible. Right. And again, honestly. Go ahead. Did you have some.
