Podcast Summary: RISK! Episode - "Beat Yourself Up"
Release Date: July 1, 2025
Host: Kevin Allison
Featured Storytellers: Glenn A. Dunsweiler, David Wayne
Episode Title: Beat Yourself Up
Introduction
In this emotionally charged episode of RISK! titled "Beat Yourself Up," host Kevin Allison delves deep into the complexities of self-criticism and personal growth. The episode features two powerful true stories from Glenn A. Dunsweiler and David Wayne, each exploring profound personal challenges and the journey toward healing and acceptance.
Glenn A. Dunsweiler: "The Friction Point" [00:00 - 18:03]
Summary:
Glenn A. Dunsweiler shares a heart-wrenching narrative about his strained relationship with his sister and the burdens of familial responsibilities. The story begins with a childhood incident where Glenn, at 17, accidentally injures his sister by rolling back his car over her feet. This event marks the beginning of a long-term rift between them.
As adults, Glenn becomes a university professor while his sister remains in Sacramento, building a stable life. Their father, referred to as "the butterfly," contrasts Glenn's transient lifestyle as he moves across the country seeking success in LA. The plot thickens when their mother is diagnosed with cancer, prompting Glenn to return to Sacramento to support his family. Despite his intentions, Glenn's presence exacerbates existing tensions, especially as he struggles with his own ambitions and the realities of his family's circumstances.
Key Moments and Quotes:
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[07:31] Glenn recounts the car incident:
"I have the keys to the house, and she wants out. Glen, stop the car. Stop the car. I don't stop the car." -
[17:09] Reflecting on his father's declining health:
"You are living some kind of spiraled life. You're just... I can't figure out why and I can't release you from it."
Glenn's efforts to assist his aging father lead to more turmoil, culminating in being struck by a car for the sixth time. The story highlights Glenn's perpetual struggle to balance his desires to help with the unintended consequences of his actions, leaving him feeling ineffective and misunderstood.
Host's Reflection and Apology [18:03 - 24:11]
After Glenn's intense storytelling, Kevin Allison offers a poignant reflection on the impact of sharing such personal narratives. He acknowledges the strain it placed on Glenn's family, revealing that Glenn's father has since passed away. Kevin mentions that Glenn shared the recorded story with his sister as a public apology for the discomfort it caused within the family.
Kevin also promotes upcoming online storytelling workshops, sharing testimonials from past participants who found the experience transformational and healing. These workshops aim to foster a supportive community for aspiring storytellers.
David Wayne: "Five Minutes" [24:11 - 38:04]
Summary:
David Wayne presents an emotionally gripping story about his father, Mark, and the profound impact of his untimely death. Mark, once absent due to a drug addiction, strives to make amends and build a strong relationship with David. Their bond is evident as Mark supports David, especially when he comes out as gay, proudly embracing his son's identity.
The narrative takes a tragic turn when Mark is involved in a motorcycle accident. David receives the devastating news and faces the harrowing decision to let his father go. The doctor informs him that Mark's injuries are unsurvivable, leaving David to grapple with guilt and regret over unanswered calls and lost opportunities to connect.
Key Moments and Quotes:
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[35:33] David reflects on his father's character:
"What makes a perfect parent is someone who wants to be there. And my dad, despite his flaws, really wanted to be there." -
[42:05] David shares his invaluable lessons:
"First is answer that phone call if you can, because it can be the last time that you get to. And answer it, even if it's a little uncomfortable... Secondly, if you have a chance to say goodbye, make it count."
In a climactic scene, David is granted five minutes to say goodbye to his father. Despite the emotional turmoil, he delivers a heartfelt farewell, emphasizing love, forgiveness, and acceptance. The experience serves as a cathartic moment for David, reinforcing the importance of seizing fleeting moments with loved ones.
Concluding Remarks and Future Episodes [38:04 - End]
Kevin Allison wraps up the episode by reflecting on the powerful stories shared by Glenn and David. He emphasizes the importance of vulnerability and the courage it takes to share one's deepest struggles. Kevin announces an upcoming all-female episode featuring stories from Shannon M. Turner and Lindsay Ames, promising a diverse and enriching listening experience.
The episode closes with a reprise of Johnny Cash's rendition of a Nine Inch Nails song, echoing the themes of loss and reflection presented throughout the narratives.
Notable Quotes
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Glenn A. Dunsweiler [07:31]:
"I have the keys to the house, and she wants out. Glen, stop the car. Stop the car. I don't stop the car." -
Glenn A. Dunsweiler [17:09]:
"You are living some kind of spiraled life. You're just... I can't figure out why and I can't release you from it." -
David Wayne [35:33]:
"What makes a perfect parent is someone who wants to be there. And my dad, despite his flaws, really wanted to be there." -
David Wayne [42:05]:
"First is answer that phone call if you can, because it can be the last time that you get to. And answer it, even if it's a little uncomfortable... Secondly, if you have a chance to say goodbye, make it count."
Final Thoughts
"Beat Yourself Up" is a compelling exploration of personal guilt, family dynamics, and the quest for redemption. Through the raw and unfiltered stories of Glenn A. Dunsweiler and David Wayne, listeners are invited to reflect on their own relationships and the importance of forgiveness and communication. RISK! continues to provide a platform for authentic storytelling, encouraging individuals to share their most vulnerable moments in pursuit of healing and understanding.
